I will claim you
by hopelessromantic5
Summary: Jacob Black has imprinted on Seth and is determined to make him his submissive. No matter what Seth thinks or wants, he will be claimed by the one he hates. Adopted from Heartsink. M for abuse and sexuality.
1. Chapter 1

**"Warning: contains Abuse and violence. Possibly lemons in future chapters.**

**Disclaimer: I do NOT own Twilight, any of its plot or its characters.**

"What about Seth?"

I stiffened as I heard my name. I was sitting on a chair in the school's too-small library, doing homework. I recognized the voice and the tone: Paul.

"What about him?" That was Jared's voice, sounding distracted.

"Do you think he'll ever "join" us?"

"_Not on your life."_ I thought.

Jared snorted. "Not likely. He's the runt of the Clearwater clan. A three year-old could beat him up."

Paul chuckled.

I was the smallest kid in my school. A tough gig, seeing how most of the kids there could hold their own at any weight lifting competition. I often wondered whether our ancestors had been exposed to some kind of radioactive substance that made them grow freakishly huge.

The vast differences in size might have been painful for a kid who was five-three in a school where the average height was five-seven, but I made up for it with my speed. I could outrun nearly anyone. But I still would have traded my running ability for a few extra pounds of muscle and maybe a three inch growth spurt in a heartbeat.

You would have thought that I would be pretty big, considering my family. My brother Sam was gigantic and my sister Leah was, well, let's just say that she could kick just about anyone's butt. She liked to practice on mine when I annoyed her, when she could catch me.

But I was small and there was nothing I could do about it. I was never bullied, thanks to the fact that I lived with my brother and he was known to blacken eyes for less than a petty insult.

Me and Leah lived with Sam and his wife Emily. My mom and dad had died in a car wreck nearly three years ago so Sam got stuck with us. It still hurt to think of them, sometimes, so I tried not to.

It was hard to ignore what other people wouldn't.

I would hear them sometimes, whispering to each other: "Poor boy, it's a wonder that he lived through birth," Or some other kind of crap.

"Why do you think that he isn't like the rest of them? Sam and Leah are one of us." That was Embry, or it might have been Quil.

Sam and Leah were part of some kind of group that only a select few could join, led by Jacob Black who was the closest thing La Push had to a president. Basically, he was the chief and what he said, went.

I didn't know why he was treated that way and whenever I asked Sam about it he would look at me with a really weird expression and say the exact same thing my dad used to say when Sam and then Leah was acting freaky.

"You'll understand someday, Seth," he would say, trying not to sound uncomfortable. "And if you don't, well, I'll explain it to you." After saying this, Sam and Leah would leave together to meet up with Paul, Jacob, Jared, Quil, Embry, and other idiots who were hyped up on steroids. I didn't think there were others, but there might have been and I wouldn't have known. Sam and Leah never talked about those meetings and they didn't like being asked.

They would often leave me and Emily alone for hours while they ran off to join their pals in some kind of get-together. Sometimes they wouldn't be back until the next day, looking like they had slept outside. I didn't know what they were up to and I honestly didn't care. I hated Jacob; he was always looking at me and laughing as if at some kind of private joke. I hated Paul, he was a jerk and a pain in the rear, and I hated Jared because he had been a bully before he joined up with Jacob and company. Then Jacob had straightened him out. That was the only good thing he ever did.

Maybe it was just a natural part of who I was. Hating. It seemed to be the thing I did best. I hated my size, I hated my physical weakness, I even hated my natural intelligence.

I wasn't really sure how I felt about Quil and Embry. All I knew was that they had been friends with Jacob up until he started up his little gang. When he did, he ignored them, just like he did everyone who wasn't in his club. Then they joined up with him, Embry first and then Quil later and it was as if they had never broken up.

I heard the rustle of cloth as someone behind the bookcase shrugged.

"Who knows? Maybe it's a quirk in his DNA like Jacob's dad." Silence.

Then there was a sad chuckle I recognized as Embry's. "Or lack thereof" he said.

Silence again. Then Paul spoke, loud enough for even those at the other tables who hadn't been listening in to look up. "Who cares? He's not one of us, and he never will be."

There was hissed chorus of 'shut up' from his companions and he fell silent.

I heard them begin to move towards the exit as they found whatever they had been looking for. Looking up just in time to see them walk out the door towards the checkout line, I tried not to glare. They always seemed to catch you at it, like they had eyes on the back of their heads.

They were all dressed in light, cheap clothes and only a few of them wore shoes. They all had cropped black hair and russet skin like mine, albeit my haircut made me look like a six year old who had taken scissors to his head on a rainy day.

I began to write again, wishing I had never come here in the first place.

"Hey Seth." said a voice, followed by the sound of someone sitting down across from me.

"Hey, Kim." I muttered, not looking up.

Kim was the only girlfriend I had ever had. Or she was the closest thing to a girlfriend I could get, I could never figure out which. She talked too much and whined and gossiped. But she was a good friend when she wasn't talking my ear off.

There were a few moments of silence while I wrote.

"Are you busy?" She finally said.

Yes.

"What does it look like?" I asked, regretting the sharpness of my tone immediately. It wasn't her fault that I was short and happened to come from a family that was known for its size. Or that I was in a bad mood.

"Like you're reading the same paragraph over and over." She didn't sound hurt. She must have seen Jacob's underlings leave the library and guessed how that would affect me. Or it just meant she wanted something from me. My guess would be with the latter.

I chuckled and looked up. She was dressed in a really girly shirt, pink with rhinestones on the front and along the sleeves. Her braces twinkled in the late afternoon sun as she spoke again. "So how's Leah?" She asked, not sounding as if she cared.

"Same," I said, looking down again and realizing I had gone two paragraphs over what the minimum for the paper was.

_No need to overdo it_, I thought as I began to collect the papers and books I had checked out, _don't want to get an _A+_._ I was determined to stay out of the smart group, I was teased enough about my size without getting called a nerd too.

"There's a new movie out, _Gunshock_, or something," Kim said, trying to sound casual but failing miserably. I could tell she had something she wanted to ask me since the moment she had seen me. She was so incredibly unsubtle; it was almost an insult if she managed to hide her real motive from you.

I knew she wanted me to ask her out, despite the nonchalant way she was doing it, so I decided to do away with hours of pointless conversation as she tried to wheedle a 'yes' from me.

"Do you want to see it?" I asked, putting the last of my school junk into my bag and looking at her.

She beamed and nodded. She made my life that much easier by being so predictable.

I stood and she followed suit. It was always easier to stay around her when I remembered that she was shorter than me.

"See you tonight," She said, not bothering to make it seem like she hadn't come into the library without the express intention of getting me to take her to the movies.

"Sure, sure," I said, using the phrase that Sam had been saying lately.

I left the library and walked to Emily's car, not caring that Paul and Jared were watching me and whispering to each other as I walked.

The movie sucked. Not that I watched any of it, I began to feel sick almost as soon as we sat down. But it sounded like it sucked and I was a pretty good judge of such things. When the movie ended I all but dragged Kim out of the movie theater feeling like I was going to throw up. Thankfully Sam was already waiting for us in front of the theater.

After taking just one look at me he sped up and drove Kim home. I didn't complain, though, and I was mildly pleased with that fact.

"Are you okay?" Kim asked when we reached her house. Not that she really cared. She only cared about herself and makeup.

I felt something start to build up in me, like a volcano. She was probably just trying to soften me up for some other thing she wanted from me. I felt anger pulse through me, trying to rip me apart. It felt like it was going to just blow me up.

But then a small voice at the back of my head, one that I had never heard before, began to talk. _Get a grip,_ it said, _don't act like a maniac just because she wanted to make sure you were okay._ The voice was calm, cool, and soothing, like a wet rag was being pressed to my forehead. I listened; it felt like it was the smart thing to do.

"I'm fine." I finally snapped. She scowled, having missed the expression that I had on my face, and got out of the car without saying anything, walking around the front.

I felt a strange urge to get out of the car and punch her, make her hurt for cheating on me.

_Wait a minute_, said the voice, _she's cheating on you? Why do you care? You know that she can't get another boyfriend; you're just looking for an excuse to be mad at her._

It was true, Kim couldn't get another boyfriend until her braces came off and that wasn't for another year. Everyone knew that braces were geeky.

_Now then,_ the voice continued, _get back in the car and listen to Sam. _

After she got into the house Sam sped off in the general direction of his house. I was feeling sicker by the minute and even though Sam was driving like a demon, I felt I was not going to make it home before I had to throw up.

Sam's cell phone rang and I could recognize the voice on the other side of the line, it was no other than Jacob Black. Wait a minute, since when was my hearing so good?

"I got your message, are you sure Sam? He wasn't showing any of the warning signs"

"I'm almost certain, it came all of the sudden, the anger, he looked like he was ready to bite the head off his girlfriend."

"Ok Sam, get him in the woods, we'll find you."

"Sure boss." After the short exchange they both hung up. If it wasn't for the fact that I felt like crap, I would've made fun of Sam for calling that idiot "boss".

I felt a huge tremor rush through me and threw up all over the dashboard. I staggered out of the car, racing for the woods and throwing up periodically.

I reached the trees and collapsed, panting, on the forest floor. My stomach hurt, like someone had punched me and it felt like my gut was full of worms, writhing inside me, shifting; then my chest hurt, like I was running out of air. My shoulders were next, followed by closely by my butt and my arms, hurting wretchedly. And then my legs followed suit, feeling like they were on fire, every muscle being pulled.

Then my head had all the blood rushing into it as I was bombarded by heat, burning, twisting heat that made me feel like I was being thrown into a bed of lava. I was going to explode.

And I did.

Into a huge wolf.

I knew only pain and darkness. Then I slept as a huge Sandy wolf on the forest floor. I didn't hear the others come around me and drag me off. Didn't hear the minds that probed mine, or the gentle nudges that two wolves, one black, one gray, gave me. I didn't feel the shock of one of them as his entire world stopped revolving around himself and focused on a new point.

I didn't see the longing that flooded his mind that every other werewolf in the La Push cult did. Desire for my body beneath his, perfectly fitting into his shape like two pieces that were made for each other, my body arching as I screamed one name as he thrust into me again and again and again.

_Jacob._


	2. Chapter 2 The Pack

_**Hello everybody, this story was originally created by Heatrsink. The first 14 chapters are all hers. Thank you for reading.**_

_**Disclaimer: I don't own Twilight or any of its characters.**_

Chapter 2 The Pack

_Why does it always have to be painful?_

A voice in my head. Wow, second time in one day. I was delusional.

_Calm down, it was a lot worse for the others._ A new voice. It sounded familiar.

_But why? Why does it hurt? He's in pain!_ The first voice sounded panicky now.

_Why? _I thought._ Why did it sound freaked out? _For some reason it didn't occur to me to be terrified at the voices in my head. It felt natural somehow. And I _didn't_ hurt. I was a little sore, but that was all.

_Welcome to the pack, shorty. _

Okay,_ that _voice I knew.

_He remembers me. I guess those bruises I gave him where worth it after all._ Her voice was both amused and affectionate at the same time as it rang though my head.

I was suddenly bombarded by a million thoughts and sensations, each one as tangible as any I had ever smelt or heard or felt. I couldn't even remember each one; they slid out of my mind like water. I only remembered the intensity of them. A few were repeated often and those I remembered. There was the smell of pine, bitter, spicy, and sweet all at the same time. There were the sounds of hearts beating behind muscle and fur, some calm, one thumping rather excitedly.

Then there was the feeling of... brotherhood. I was connected to each of them in a way that could only be compared to strings, steel chains that linked me to them in ways that were both tenuous and unbreakable.

I saw myself from several different perspectives, a sandy wolf fast asleep on the forest floor. If I had been human my mind probably would have exploded from all the information that was pouring into it.

I could hear thoughts. I would only phase when I got mad. And I knew about imprinting, the method of finding one's mate. I knew all of this in an instant, like I was remembering something I had forgotten.

I wasn't afraid of my new form. I couldn't be. Not now. Not with my brother and sister near me. Not when Jacob had imprinted on me. That was much worse.

_Worse? _Jacob's voice was in my head now and I recognized it as the one that I had heard first. His thoughts were shocked, then angry.

I felt his anger at my disgust for his imprinting on a guy. I felt his lust for my body, veiled by his anger but still bubbling beneath the surface. I felt my own fear as I saw countless images rush through his mind. They were all the same, only the scenario changed. A large bed, springs squeaking beneath him as he slammed into my body, the forest floor at twilight, dirt and sweat covering my body. The shower, water running over me as I... uh... sucked him.

And in all of them, the imaginary me seemed to _enjoy_ it. Yup, he had imprinted.

Sick.

I opened my eyes and sat up. Jacob was the biggest one and drew my gaze first, his shaggy red-brown fur sticking up like a cat that was threatened. That was due to his anger, I assumed. I quickly looked away from him and swept the clearing I had been laying in with my eyes. Sam, black as midnight, sat next to a small gray wolf that I knew was Leah. He was trying to feel pleased with my joining the pack but he was slightly sickened by the lascivious thoughts Jacob had been having about me since imprinting. Leah's thoughts were, like her emotions and her spoken words, to the point and entirely undisguised.

She was completely grossed out.

And, to be honest, so was I.

Embry and Quil, the former a dark gray with spots on his back and the latter a warm chocolate brown, stood next to each other near Sam and Leah.

I couldn't sense anything coming from Embry but Quil was excited to have another person to be allowed to hang out with.

Jared, a dark honey brown with white feet, was closer to Jacob. He was glancing from me to Jacob as if trying to believe that we were connected. As I saw him he was in the process of wondering whether or not I was capable of having kids since Jacob had imprinted on me. He felt my gaze and he looked at me, curiosity overcoming his embarrassment for his thoughts.

I still didn't want to meet Jacob while he was angry or imagining me completely naked against a tree. Both of which he was still in the process of. On his left stood Paul, a silvery wolf with a slightly lopsided face, like he had stuck it in a blender when he was a kid.

Scrambling to my feet, I tried to get used to the feeling of speed and power that I could feel pulsing through my body. I stumbled slightly when I took a step that carried me a little further than I had intended. I wasn't used to the strength in my legs and it was difficult to gauge how far each step would take me.

I spent several minutes getting used to my new form while the pack looked on, Jacob's anger melting away in the face of my awkward attempts to walk.

Feeling him watch me, affection and concern for my clumsiness mixing in him, I began to concentrate harder to try and block out the feelings that were swirling around me without much success.

I finally began to feel more comfortable in my new body and decided that it was time to try running. I had been pretty fast in human form; maybe I would be faster than the average werewolf.

_Don't count on it,_ thought Leah, getting to her feet and trotting over to me. _I'm the fastest in this pack and I don't intend to give up that position easily, _she thought as she nudged my shoulder affectionately before heading for the outside of the clearing. I was a about to run after her when a sharp voice rang out though all of our minds.

_NO!_ it said, anger merging with fear for my safety. We all turned in surprise towards Jacob.

His fur was sticking up again and he was glaring at Leah, feeling furious at her for even suggesting that I race her when I had only been a werewolf for a few hours.

_Why?_ I asked, confused by the jumble of emotions that rushed out of him.

_You could get hurt!_ Jacob shouted, accenting the thought with a threatening growl.

_So?_ I thought, getting annoyed as I felt him wincing at the image of me tripping and possibly dying.

_So, I'm not going to allow it!_

_Well,_ I snapped mentally, _it's not your life to lose, is it?_

_That may be, but you aren't going anywhere until you're have more practice._

I felt something snap inside of me, and this time the voice didn't come to my aid. I was thoroughly grossed out by the possessive feelings he had towards me and I wanted to get rid of them.

I started to concentrate. I had never phased back into a human and I wasn't sure how to go about it, but I damn well wasn't going to put up with any more of his imprinting crap.

I felt a small tremor of cold run up my spine, almost the exact opposite of the heat that had run down it when I had phased god knew how long ago.

_Uh, Seth?_ Jared thought, _Could you do that somewhere else?_

_Why?_ I thought testily. I wasn't too happy with him either; I could sense a certain amount of disgust that he was directing at me. Apparently, if your one of the imprints is gay, so is the other.

_Your, uh, clothes don't just reappear whenever you phase back._

I saw what he meant and I felt the heat rush to my face. I now knew why Sam and Leah went through clothes so fast.

_Here,_ Sam pushed a bundle towards me. _I got these for you. Phase and put these on in the woods._

_Thanks,_ I thought, picking up the bundle and scampering into the outlining ring of trees that surrounded the place, trying to ignore the thoughts that Jacob was having about me completely naked in the middle of the woods.

I found a small space that was a fair distance from the clearing. I wouldn't have put it past Jacob to come up from behind while I was changing and take advantage of me.

I let the cool tremor run through my back, letting it spread to the rest of my body. A few seconds later, I was a completely naked fifteen year-old human on all fours on the ground.

I couldn't help but feel pleased at having been able to phase back so easily.

I slid the shorts on, feeling a strong sense of relief in the silence of my mind. They had an elastic band and were pitch black. I recognized them as the ones that had gone missing from my room a few weeks ago. Sam and Leah had been hoping that I would become one of them, I realized, so they had nicked them just in case.

"You look good in black." Jacob's human voice made me jump. I whirled around. He was leaning against a tree a few feet from where I was, his arms crossed. He had no shirt and wore a pair of faded khakis.

Good grief, he was _huge_. Broad shouldered and prominently chested, I could tell even from a distance that he was taller than me and he had muscles all over his body, each one toned and bulging underneath his red-brown skin, like padding. Only I could see very easily that they were all as hard as rock. He was barefoot and his feet, like his hands and neck, were thick and covered in veins.

He noticed my stares and grinned, showing brilliant white teeth. How long had he been standing there?

"You like what you see?" he asked, raising one eyebrow cockily. That got my attention. I had always been secretly jealous of Jacob and his body and now that I had seen him without a shirt, it just reaffirmed that he was pretty good-looking. But it was the cockiness that had always bugged me

"The faster it leaves, the more I'll like it." I snapped. I had come out there in order to get away from Jacob and his stupid possessive thoughts and seeing him here, towering above me and reminding me that I was small didn't put me in too good of a mood.

His grin vanished.

Good.

"Believe me, Seth, me and body won't be leaving any time soon." He smiled coldly. "Or you and your body for that matter."

He straightened up and started towards me. I gulped and took a few steps back.

"Stop." Jacob's voice was commanding. My body froze, despite my efforts to the contrary. He walked forward, agonizingly slow.

He finally came close to me, maybe a foot from where I stood, frozen.

"How are you doing that?" I asked, trying not to sound awed by the power that he had implied in that one phrase.

"Alpha's order get obeyed, whether they like it or not." He said, chuckling.

He was the Alpha? I stared at him as I tried to piece together what that meant for me. Obviously he was in charge and he could make...

Oh God.

He could make me do things with him. If he told me to bend over and hold still, I would have to do it. He could make me sleep with him, no matter what I wanted. He could make me do all the things he had imagined me doing with just a single command.

His hand came up, slowly, and reached for my face.

"So... beautiful." he murmured, as if to himself. "Seth."

I tried to push him away from me but my arms just hung limp, refusing to do what I wanted them to.

His hand touched my cheek and then slid it across my face until he was cupping it. Then he moved his other hand up and placed it on the other side of my head, sandwiching my face between them.

"Mine." He whispered.

Then his lips smashed into mine, moving roughly, violently and possessively. He let go of my face and grabbed my waist in one hand, pulling me against him, the other grabbed a handful of my hair. He pressed my face closer to his and he shoved his tongue into my mouth, exploring it. He started backing me into a nearby tree, pressing my back onto the rough surface.

I wanted to scream, I wanted to shout. Hell, I wanted to do anything but what he was doing right now.

He pulled away, looking into my eyes with a lust that made him look like he was angry. "Take off your shorts," He ordered in his Alpha voice. "Give yourself to me."

Okay, anything other than what he had been doing and what he was about to do.

Then, like an angel, the voice came to me, cool and calming and confident. Only instead of giving me a step by step tutorial of what to do to stop Jacob from pounding my ass to pieces, it said only one word.

_Faint._

Not exactly what I had been expecting. But it had been a good idea to follow its advice before, so I followed it this time as well.

I slumped in Jacob's grasp, closing my eyes and letting my head fall onto his chest.

I felt him stiffen.

"Seth?" He asked, sounding concerned.

Suddenly, I could move my arms. I pushed away from him, and took a jump away from.

Jacob looked shocked, then hurt, then very, very angry.

His hands clenched into fists at his sides and he took a step forward.

"Just leave me alone!" I shouted. "Stop acting like you own me!"

I turned and ran away from him, towards the surrounding woods and a small amount of solitude. Why did he have to be so incredibly perverted?

Suddenly, I was on the forest floor, Jacob on top of me. I felt his hands around my neck and my body stiffened instinctively, like a puppy would do if it was held by its scruff.

"You're wrong," Jacob snarled in my ear, I felt his nails dig into my shoulders. "I _do_ own you, Seth Clearwater."

"Get off me, you stupid homosexual!" I yelled, trying desperately to free myself. I was terrified, I admit, and if I had been able to move I would have been shaking with fear.

His grip on my shoulder and neck tightened.

"If it had been anyone else that said that to me," he snarled, "I would have made sure that they regret it for the rest of their lives."

I didn't even want to think of what he would have done to me if I had called him that and hadn't been his intended mate.

"You're my imprint," he continued, his thumb running along the skin at my shoulders, feeling the texture of my flesh. "And you belong to me."

"NO!" I shouted, "I don't belong to anyone! Least of all to you!"

There was a pause, during which I realized that the others had come up around us, silent as the dead, looking on as Jacob tightened his grip on me.

Of course, they couldn't do anything. If they tried to help me they would risk getting their arm ripped off or something.

"Then I'll just have to _make_ you belong to me." he snarled in my ear before biting down on my eardrum. I managed not to cry out, somehow, though I felt my eyes filling with tears.

I knew what he was planning and I felt my heart plummet. It definitely involved me, him, and a whole lot of screaming.

Well, I wasn't about to be raped by him, imprint or not. I would fight him rather than let him claim me.

At least, I would try.


	3. Chapter 3 The Agreement

**Disclaimer: I do not own Twilight or any of the characters created by Stephenie Meyer**

Chapter 3 The Agreement

I sat on the edge of my bed, covering my eyes with my hands, wondering what I had done to deserve my fate. Had I killed someone? Starved a third world country? Started WWIII?

Not to my knowledge.

I lay my back on the tangled sheets that still smelled like Jacob with a groan, willing myself to go to sleep. It had been the worst Saturday in the history of the world because I only had three months left to be a virgin.

Like I said, worst Saturday ever.

My eyes smarted horribly. The tears that I had shed last night, combined with the lack of sleep, left them dry and sore. My arm still hurt and my lips felt swollen.

Could I even go to sleep? Now that I knew what lay in store for me?

Sam had interfered at the last second, managing to save me from Jacob and a butt-load of pain, but only temporarily. I suspected that he only stepped in to save Leah, really. As soon as Jacob had started to take my shorts off she had attacked him. She was in wolf form and he was still in in human, but he had still gotten the upper hand.

I winced, remembering the encounter.

_A growl shot through the clearing as Leah charged Jacob, still on top of my frozen body. He had turned me over and had been about to remove my shorts. As she reached him he grabbed her by the scruff and heaved her across the small space. She crashed into the trees, Jacob starting towards her, still in human mode, when Paul growled threateningly at him._

_Paul and Leah had been pretty much best friends since they were kids, never advancing past that stage and content for it to stay that way. They never dated, only hung out, and never got jealous if the other one had a girlfriend or boyfriend. Paul had even gone through a stage where they both had boyfriends and Leah was perfectly fine with this._

_She accepted him even when he had been gay, however temporarily._

_In a way, I guess they were only friends because they could put up with each other in a way that no else could. She was frank and sharp-witted, almost to point of insulting, and he was as sarcastic as the day was long and dumber than a board. He teased and she retaliated, he tripped, she punched. It was almost as if they showed their affection for the other by fighting and knew that, no matter what was said, it was never honestly meant._

_They just laughed whenever people told them that they should become more to each other; they were happy in their relationship and didn't want it to change._

_I knew all of this from just observing it as a human and it was only confirmed when I saw it in their minds._

_They were living proof that opposites attract and if there was one thing that the big-mouthed jerk hated, it was to see anyone to physically abuse his BFF._

"_Shut up." Jacob snarled at the silver wolf. Paul's mouth snapped shut with a click but the hair on the back of his neck remained up. He struggled against the gag that Jacob had put on him and started forward._

_I wondered what he would be saying if he had been human. Probably none of it would have been below a rated-R movie._

"_Stay were you are." Jacob shouted, running towards Leah as she struggled to regain her footing. Paul froze in place, watching them with panic on his wolf face. As Jacob neared her a shiver ran down his spine and I realized that he was about to phase. I tried to cry out but Jacob's order even applied to my mouth. I knew that if Jacob could do that to Leah in human form, she stood no chance against him when he was in wolf mode._

_He phased into the russet brown wolf and was charging her. The order hadn't just been directed at Paul. He had meant it for everyone, even Leah. I could tell she was panicking as he came closer to her._

_A whine from Leah was all I heard and Jacob had her down._

_Cheater. _

_He had ordered her to freeze and he was going to hurt her. I couldn't watch, like the coward I was, I turned away._

_Where was the voice when you needed it? I tried to focus as Jacob closed the distance between himself and my sister. I had to relax my body, to somehow get rid of the bonds that Jacob had put on me just a few minutes before and move between them. I had to save her._

_There was the sound of teeth tearing into flesh..._

I sat up with a gasp, pain shooting through my arm. Damn, it still hurt. I had moved it only an inch or so, but enough for it to react.

I had managed, somehow, to get between them, but at a price. Jacob's claws had gotten into my arm and it were still healing, a day later.

A knock on the door.

I turned away from it willing whoever it was to go away.

Not that it had ever worked before.

"Seth?" Emily peeked around the open door, looking around at my trashed room.

"Yeah?" I mumbled, glancing at her as she walked in, kicking aside the shoes and clothes that littered the cramped space.

She was gorgeous, as always, with straight black hair that reached just past her shoulders. She had perfect skin that looked like the color of toasted cinnamon, only marred by a bright red scar on her neck that still hadn't healed completely, like my arm.

Only a few people knew that the scar went the length of her body, and still fewer knew that the scar was the consequence of having a werewolf imprint on you. Sam had lost control a few years back and he had hurt her without meaning to.

He still blamed himself for it, although Emily told him that it wasn't his fault. The scar on her neck and the one on my arm were proof that even imprints weren't completely safe from the one who did the imprinting.

"Hey," I murmured, looking away from her. I was ashamed of what I was and I didn't really want to spend time with anyone.

"Do you want some company? Or some chocolate chip cookies?" She held out a plate full of chocolaty perfection. She was a chocoholic's dream cook and I was the worst one on the planet.

"I'd appreciate both," I said, feeling the weight of the night before lift off somewhat. Still, I wanted to spend more time alone. Jacob had given me a lot to think about, and I was feeling nostalgic. But she had baked me her award-winning confections and I was willing to put up with a little company in exchange for them.

She smiled slyly. "Liar."

"What do you mean?" I asked as she crossed the room.

"I mean that you're not telling me the truth." She set the plate on the bed next to me and, sitting down next to them, took one.

I grinned; she could lift the mood even when she was being sarcastic.

They had a great relationship, Sam and Emily. She was the laughter and he was the solemnity. They were polar opposites, like Paul and Leah, only they had something helping them cope: the imprint. Sam had met Emily when she was sixteen and he was eighteen. She had been visiting a cousin and he had gone head over heels for her. And that was before he had phased.

I could totally understand why he had fallen for her. She was bright, cheerful, and a great cook. All of these were essential in an intimate relationship with my big brother. He was way too intense and serious and he ate like a bull. She helped him get through times when he was discouraged and he loved her more than life itself.

It helped that he was already in love with her when he had imprinted. She was a little more willing to go into a relationship with him than most imprints were at first. In most cases, the one who imprinted started to bug the object of their affection until the person broke down and went out with them.

Like Sam had said, it's hard to resist that level of commitment.

"What am I lying about?" I asked, following her example and taking a cookie.

"You tell me, you're the one doing it." She said, finishing her cookie and starting on another.

"Well, you seem to be the one who's jumping to conclusions and making unfair accusations." I pointed out, my words sounding thick from the cookie that I had stuffed in my mouth.

She sighed, then got up.

"You just want to spend some time alone. You don't want company."

I blinked in surprise. Was I that transparent?

"Get some rest," she continued making her way past the clutter. "I'll call you when supper is ready."

I watched her shut the door and felt a rush of affection. If not for the fact that she was my sister-in-law I might have had a crush on her when I was a kid.

I lay back on my bed, overturning the cookies. Several of them clattered onto the floor adding to the mess already covering it.

I didn't feel the need to pick up my room. The only thing I felt was despair.

Despair and resentment.

I didn't know why I was in this situation but I would let Jacob claim me with a completely, with willing heart, before I submitted. I would fight it; I would fight him, even if I ended with a missing arm.

Like the plate and its contents, my life had been overridden by forces that were beyond my control.

But, unlike the cookies, I wouldn't let my fate rule me. I would go against it, even if it killed me.

I closed my eyes and continued in my reminiscing.

***FLASHBACK***

"Jacob agreed to wait until you're sixteen before he mates with you."

I stared at Sam as he sat across me on the log, shock mingling with disgust.

"Mate with me?" I squeaked. "As in..." I couldn't go on; the thought was too gross for me to process with too much detail, even if I had been a hairsbreadth from it not two hours ago.

Sam nodded, looking exhausted.

I could totally understand why he looked tired. After dragging the three of us apart he had been faced with the prospect of having to get Jacob to talk when he was still determined, as Sam had put it, to "mate with me."

He had accomplished that task after some time and had come back without his leader and looking like Jacob had punched him. He had some source less blood running down his lip and a slightly purple eye. Even these small injuries had faded by the time he had reached me, squeezed between Paul and Jared on a fallen log.

This had been Jacob's only stipulation when he had agreed with Sam to negotiate my virginity.

Smart move on his part, since I had been seized by several bouts of cowardice in their absence and would have left somewhat sooner than Jacob would have preferred if not for my body guards.

They were careful not to touch me though. They had seen what Jacob done to Quil when the chocolate wolf had tried to help me up. The scar the alpha had given his friend wouldn't be healing any time soon.

"We need to talk." Was all Sam had said.

I had followed my brother to a small clearing that he and Jacob had apparently just vacated without much enthusiasm on my part. I wasn't too excited about finding out what my fate would be.

It was a small space, about ten feet across, that was well shaded from the evening sun. Two boulders sat in the middle, perhaps five feet away from each other, looking like large cubes of gray ice.

When we reached it Sam had turned to me and said, before sitting down, "I want this to be a normal meeting, if you please."

There were claw marks all along the trees and one of the two ton boulders looked like it had been freshly rolled into the small space for someone to sit on. I could see why he had made that request.

That was when he had told me the news. Which brought us to our current situation.

"It took some persuading," he said as I sputtered in front of him, "But I got him to agree that he would wait until you were sixteen to claim you. He accepted my proposal on the condition that I agree to sex if it was willing on your part."

I started to speak, angry denial of me ever willingly becoming intimate with someone who had almost raped me in front of the entire pack, flooding into my mouth and threatening to explode out of me.

_Oh, please, not this again,_ the voice in my head said, _calm down, you should be glad that he managed to get you three months of virginity instead of just backing down and letting Jacob have you._

I tried to think of an angle to argue from.

I couldn't. The voice was right. Three months was better than none.

I tried to think.

Impossible. My thoughts were so jumbled I couldn't think at all.

I tried swallowing.

No success. My mouth had tightened when I recalled all the things that Jacob had imagined doing with me, making the simple act of gulping impossible.

I tried breathing. I needed to stay alive, in any case.

Even less so.

I tried not phasing.

At last, victory. The voice was still there; calmly talking to me as if I were a child afraid of the dark and it was my mother, comforting me.

"Is that all?" I managed to say with difficulty. The tremors had faded but I had ripped my left short leg to pieces in the process of calming down.

Sam looked surprised that I hadn't phased and attacked him but kept his composure.

"Yes."

I nodded and started to get up.

"Seth," Sam suddenly looked a million years old, give or take a century. "Don't condemn him."

I stared at him. He was asking me not to hate Jacob?

Then I started to get angry.

"Oh, I wouldn't think of it," I snapped sarcastically, "That would be unfair of me. It's not his fault that he nearly raped me on the ground and is still determined to follow through with his dirty work. It's all my fault for being born."

"You should be glad he agreed to wait." Sam's face had turned into a mask-like state, the only sign that he was angry.

"Why?" I shouted, throwing my arms up.

"Because he's the Alpha."

"So?"

"Alpha's are hardwired to mate the moment they imprint," snapped Sam. "It's a part of who they are; they can't control it. He kept a grip on himself when you were unconscious for the sake of your sanity but when he saw you human and then later naked, it kind of hit a nerve. You started a chain reaction and his instincts took over. Every minute of the next three months are going to be torture for him. Every time he sees you he'll want to claim you, but he can't stay away from you."

"Then I'll leave him alone." I shouted. Actually, I'd make a point of avoiding him if I could help it.

"Have you ever seen me truly happy when I'm not around Emily?"

I scowled.

"Please, Seth, don't antagonize him. I don't know how long his control will last and I'm not about to have my brother pounded into submission on Jacob's sheets."

I didn't say anything. There was nothing left to say.

Sam stood and led me back to the clearing where the rest of the pack was waiting for us, Jacob mercifully still absent. I didn't think that I could have stood another minute in his company, so it was a small blessing that he was still missing.

Leah, in human form now, walked up to me. Without a word, she took my hand and led me away from the watching eyes of Paul, Jared, Quil, and Embry.

We reached the road where Sam's car lay idly on the side of the road, and Leah gestured for me to get in, still not speaking.

She drove, I was still miserable and she must have sensed it, not trying to make conversation.

Dinner was almost normal. The only differences being that Sam was absent and that I ate nearly twice as much as normal. I just felt ridiculously hungry and Sam never missed a meal if he could help it.

The evening passed slowly, almost lethargically. Nothing out of the ordinary happened, except for my accidentally breaking a glass in my abnormally strong grip. I still wasn't used to my strength, unfortunately for Emily's favorite mug.

It was eleven when I got sick of waiting for Sam to come and headed for my room, hoping for a few hours of sleep.

I wasn't really surprised to see Jacob sprawled on my bed, waiting for me. I wasn't surprised, but I was disappointed. There went all hope of getting a good night sleep.

I stood in my open doorway, my arms crossed. I felt his eyes rake over my body and resisted the urge to shiver. I was wearing jeans and an olive green t-shirt, thankfully, so at least I had some protection against his lustful stares.

He was dressed much the same, albeit with a black t-shirt that clung to his body much more than mine did. He patted the spot next to him, inviting me to sit.

I scowled and shook my head.

"What do you want?" I snapped.

He moved off the bed and walked over to me. I somehow stopped myself from running away from him.

He pulled me into my room before closing the door.

"I would think that it was obvious." He said, turning around.

I said nothing, just crossed my arms again.

He reached for my face, touching my cheek with his middle finger. "Beautiful." he whispered.

I growled and knocked it away.

His face darkened.

Suddenly, I was against the wall, Jacob hands pressing my shoulders against the blue painted surface.

"Remember whose you are." He snarled in my face.

"Leave me alone," I said through my teeth. Probably the stupidest thing I could have said since the last time I had said it I had ended up on the forest floor.

He chuckled.

"And if I don't?" he asked more quietly, removing one hand from my shoulders and running the back of it across the side of my neck.

I couldn't think of anything to say. There was really nothing I _could _do.

He smirked, an amused chuckle creeping in at the end.

"I thought so." He said huskily, lust in every syllable.

Then his lips were against mine, one hand under my chin, the other on my neck.

I didn't know what to do. I couldn't fight back and risk setting him off. On the other hand, I wasn't about to just let him make out with me whenever he wanted.

The problem was solved for me as I was suddenly on the bed, Jacob kissing me even more passionately than he had in the woods. I felt his lips leave my mouth and run along my jawbone and then my neck, kissing the flesh. I was petrified with fear, that much I could admit, and if I hadn't been so stiff I might have shook.

"You taste so good." He moaned against my throat. As if to prove his point, he ran his tongue over my skin, coating it in a trail of saliva as he moved upward.

Okay, if I had been merely sickened by his behavior before, I was totally disgusted by what he was doing now.

Then I felt his swollen erection pressed against my stomach.

He was turning on.

That was it. I wasn't going to put up with this.

I opened my mouth to shout and bring Emily and Leah when my cellphone rang on the bedside table. I had brought it in from the car and had left it charging. Jacob's head snapped up, and shot for the phone.

I tried to grab it out of his hand but Jacob had already flipped it opened and put it to his own ear.

"Hello?" His voice was hostile.

He listened and I felt him stiffen. He glanced at me, still trapped by his body. I gestured for the phone but he ignored me.

"No, I'm afraid he isn't available right now."

He paused as the person talked on the other end of the phone. As they continued, his pose became gradually more rigid before the tremors started. Whatever the person was saying, it was starting to get him mad.

"I'll be sure and tell him that," he snarled into the phone. "Good-bye."

As I watched, he crushed the phone in his hand and flung it to the side, turning his attention back to me, his face livid.

"Do you know who that was?" he snarled, regaining his grip on my shoulders.

"No," I squeaked.

"Kim," he spat the name out like a curse word.

I gulped. That could not be a good sign.

"And do you want to know why she was calling?"

I thought about it. Survival instinct overrode curiosity and I shook my head.

His gaze softened and he let his torso drop onto his elbows.

"She wanted to see if you wanted to hang out tomorrow."

"Oh."

He chuckled.

"Can I go?" The words were out of my mouth before I could stop them.

He stiffened again and his eyes flashed with anger.

"NO." He snarled.

I glared at him, annoyance getting the better of common sense.

"Why not? She's just a friend."

He snorted. He didn't believe me. It was true; really, she only pretended to be my girlfriend for the sake of her image.

"That's not what she told me," he sounded accusing, as if I had lied to him.

I was silent, deciding that pretending to be a mute was the best option at the moment.

He sighed, then pressed his lips against mine, more gentle this time. I kept still, not letting myself feel him.

After several moments he pulled away.

"Seth," he said, "I want you to break up with her. You belong to me, and I don't want to see you talking to her."

I opened my mouth, about to refuse to his demands, when his grip on my shoulders tightened, inflaming the partially healed wound on my arm. I managed not to gasp in pain but a wince escaped me.

"You can't..." I started before he interrupted me.

"Break up with her." He was using the alpha voice.

I would have to.

I was about to make some sort of rebellious comment when I felt his erection pressing into my leg. I felt the color race out of my face.

He smiled.

"No one is ever going to touch you again." his voice was light, conversational, "You belong to me and I'm not going to let anyone take you from me. I'm going to be the only one who ever kisses you and I _will_ be the one to take your virginity." His smile vanished and his tone became sinister. "And if anyone ever tries to be more than a friend, I'll rip them to pieces."

I shivered.

"And if you ever try anything with anyone..." He trailed off.

"You'll what?" I asked, though I pretty much knew the answer.

He smiled coldly and, next thing I knew, my legs were on his shoulders and his crotch was pressed to my butt. I could feel his clothed erection straining to break through his jeans.

"I'll make you mine." he growled lustfully.

Then he let me slid back into my previous position before reaching over and flicking off the bedside lamp. He lay down next to me and pulled me against him until my back was against his chest. He held me tightly so I couldn't wiggle free and occasionally kissed the nape of my neck.

In the darkness that followed, as he slept beside me, I began to cry.

***END FLASHBACK***

I fell asleep on my bed, trying not to cry again.

I didn't hear Jacob come in through the window.

I didn't feel the gentle kiss he placed on my cheek.

I didn't hear him whisper in my ear. "No matter what you think or want or plan, Seth Clearwater." I didn't hear him pause before he kissed my neck. "I will claim you."


	4. Chapter 4 The Promise

**Disclaimer: I do not own Twilight or any of the characters created by Stephenie Meyer.**

Chapter 4 The Promise

"Jacob, let go of him," Sam's voice came to me through a haze of sleep.

"No," Jacob snarled, his voice low and threatening. "He's mine."

As if to confirm this fact, I felt a pair of arms tighten around me. The smell of cinnamon rolls was in the air. Emily must be in a good mood if she got up early to make them. The woody smell of Jacob was pressing in around me, making it hard to breathe, reminding me simultaneously of old spice body deodorant, earth, and pine.

I hated it.

Maybe I wouldn't have loathed it, if not for the fact that it was Jacob who was the source. Again, hating was natural, but it was intensified in Jacob's case.

I loved freedom, and Jacob was depriving me of it. The possessive and sexual thoughts he was continually having about me were gradually getting worse and it wasn't helping his cause.

The last month, the first of the three months I had left to remain unclaimed, had been just awful. He was always with me, hovering like a mother, and viciously attacking anyone who touched me, intentionally or not. He had broken Embry's nose twice for brushing up against me during a patrol. He had snapped Leah's arm when she gave me a pat on the back for beating her in a race. Jared and Paul had both had their tails bitten and their legs twisted for the monumental crime of teasing me. Even Sam wasn't safe. He had given me a spanking, which I still got if I needed them, when he caught me trying to make calls to the FBI and the end result was a scar to match Emily's.

I had been kind of annoyed at this; we had been raised that way and Sam was giving me justly deserved punishment.

Jacob's excuse: "If he needs to be disciplined, I'll be the one to do it. No one else is going to punish my mate."

Quil was the only one unscathed but I knew it wouldn't be long before he suffered because of Jacob imprinting on me.

If not for the pack's ability to heal, Jacob might have put the entire group in the hospital in just a few hours.

They had since fallen into the routine of giving me a wide berth, never coming too close where they might accidentally touch me and end up in the hospital. The only physical contact was with Emily and Jacob. Since Emily was human and already imprinted on Jacob allowed her to at least give me a hug. Otherwise Jacob was the only one who could touch me, kissing or stroking my face, whispering things like: "beautiful" or, "my Seth." If a stranger had some to town, he would have thought that my name was "Mine."

Stupid imprint.

But Emily was the only one. I hadn't gone back to school yet and Jacob had expressly forbidden me to talk to any of my old friends, especially Kim. If I did see them, which was rare, it was always in the company of Jacob. He would usually do one of two things: drag me away from them, muttering curse words that would make a sailor blush, or kiss me possessively, making sure that my friends saw that I was his.

When I did go back to school, I knew it would be to pretty much the same thing as with the pack. They would avoid me and if they didn't, it would be that they were suicidal or just plain crazy. Add in the fact that I was already considered gay by the whole non-werewolf community and you have a great recipe for an awful school year to look forward to.

My life had become a living hell and there was nothing I could do to stop it. None of this made me like my overprotective imprinter any more. In fact, I liked him less every day, if I had liked him at all.

"It's just for a few hours, maybe less." I felt a hand touch my arm, trying to get a grip on it. That was Sam. I could tell by the direction of his voice that he was right next to the bed, just a few inches from where I lay, wrapped in Jacob's way too possessive embrace.

Sam had been pretty decent about the whole thing. As long as Jacob didn't eat Emily's food or claim me by pounding my body into the nearest flat surface, the alpha was welcome. On Sam's part anyway; Leah would have liked nothing more than to rip Jacob to shreds. She was the only one who was openly sickened by Jacob's behavior and his undisguised intent to ram his third leg up my hole. The others tried to remain aloof from my predicament but their disgust was something that was hard to hide.

"I don't care, he isn't going." I was jerked roughly away from the hand and the arms tightened around me. I let myself fall limp and be pulled about. It was instinctive, like breathing. I knew that if I resisted it would make it that much worse. It was better to rebel when I wasn't in arms that could crush me to death.

"Don't you think he deserves an explanation? That he should know why all this is happening?" Sam's voice was demanding and upset, like he was hurt by Jacob's refusal.

"If he goes, so do I." Jacob snarled. My ears pricked up. If it was somewhere where Jacob wasn't allowed, I definitely wanted to go.

"Jay specifically said for him to come alone," Sam sounded snappish.

I wondered how late or early it was for Sam to snap at Jacob. I still hadn't opened my eyes and it could have been the middle of the day for all I knew. That was the thing about La Push; it was always the same when it came to lighting. The clouds created an impenetrable wall that blocked out the sun except on extremely rare days when the sun got the better of the evaporated water that made up the eternal barrier between the land and the sky.

"Then he isn't going. I'm not going to let him go anywhere where there might be danger," Jacob growled, his arms tightening around me.

If that was the case, then the only safe places in his opinion were where he happened to be. How convenient.

"He only wants to give him some pointers on being imprinted on." Sam had an exasperated quality to his voice now. Now I was definitely interested. Maybe this guy could tell me how to get Jacob to un-imprint.

That thought alone was enough to make me want to go even more than I already did.

"Then why can't I go?" Jacob was demanding and arrogant. He just couldn't understand how I could go somewhere where he couldn't.

Yup, I wanted to go.

"Because he doesn't like alphas." Sam snapped, the sound of his teeth grinding together joining in on the end of his sentence.

"Why?" Jacob's voice was demanding and I could almost hear the scowl he was undoubtedly wearing.

"Because it was an alpha who banished him." Sam's voice was tense.

"Tough luck, Seth isn't going" Jacob hissed. The arms closed tighter around me, if that was even possible.

It hurt like heck so I decided to play the I-just-woke-up-and-didn't-hear-anything-you-said card.

I yawned and opened my eyes, stretching as best as I could in Jacob's grip. The window was dark as was the room. Sam towered above me and Jacob as we lay on my bed, Jacob holding me with my back against his chest and his legs twisted around mine.

Jacob had formed the habit of spending the night in my bed, holding me close to him and not letting me go until morning. Then he would escort me to wherever the rest of the pack happened to be meeting. Probably to make sure that I didn't sneak away while he was asleep.

I would have run away if not for the fact that I knew he would hunt me down and there would be nothing to save me from him.

At least he always wore clothes when he was forcing himself on me; I didn't know what would happen if he kissed me while one or both of us was topless or worse, bottomless.

"Where?" I said, struggling into a sitting position. Jacob tightened his grip again and I fell back on the bed next to him. I cut him a withering glare before turning my attention back to Sam.

"A man wants to talk to you and explain why Jacob imprinted on you." he said, his face completely enshrouded by darkness, keeping his expression in the dark.

"Who cares why I did it?" Jacob practically shouted. If I had any doubt that he could hold me closer, I was proven wrong as he held me so tightly that I was positive that I was going to bruise.

"I do." I managed to gasp out, starting to get up. Jacob let me go, much to my surprise

"Seth you aren't going." He said in a much softer voice, his hand closed around my arm just before I could leap out of the bed, right over where the scars from the first day I had phased were. They had since healed but they seemed to be the place he usually grabbed, almost as if he was trying to cover them up.

"Yes, I am." I snapped irritably, the need to show him that I had a life of my own building up in me.

"No you aren't." He was starting to get angry. I felt his grip tighten still more.

"Yes I am." I hissed, trying to pull away from him.

"No, you're not." He growled in the alpha voice.

Cheater.

I scowled at him before turning back to Sam. He still stood over us, like sentinel, silent and immovable.

"Can he come here?"

I barely made out Sam's head moving from side to side as he shook his head.

"No, he wanted to meet you on the border. He doesn't want to trespass." He said, crossing his arms.

"Well," I said, my cheerful voice sounding false even to my own ears, "I'll just meet him there and come right back." Jacob growled and tightened his grip.

Jeez, he was like a freaking anaconda.

"You're not leaving my side until I say you can," he growled.

That was probably the worst thing he could have said.

"Darn you Jacob, I'll do anything I like!" I shouted.

I struggled against Jacob's death grip on my arm but only succeed in making him angrier.

"You aren't going Seth, and if you try to leave I swear that I'll rip your pants off and pound you until you can't walk!" He roared at me.

I pulled still more and he retaliated by squeezing my arm until tears began to form in my eyes.

I had never been so grateful to hear the voice in my head than I did at that moment.

There had been a lot of opportunities for it to come to me in the last week but it had been speaking to me less and less as I got more in control of myself. I still hadn't phased out of anger and no one could figure out why. I had tried explaining it to them but they merely shook their head and told me that they couldn't hear anything in my mind except my own thoughts, so I had eventually stopped telling them about it.

_Why don't you bargain with him?_ It said, _tell him that you'll make out with him when you get back if he lets you go._

_But he already kisses me whenever he wants;_ I thought back, _why would that sort of promise get me to the border?_

_Tell him you'll kiss him back,_ the voice whispered.

I blanched mentally. I certainly didn't want to encourage him, but I was still hoping that I could find out how to make him stop being such an over-protective bone-head and the guy seemed like the best option. The idea of kissing another guy was disgusting in and of itself but to actually respond was out of the question.

Still, I really wanted to see this guy, though I wasn't exactly sure why.

I took a deep breath and looked at him, rallying my courage. He was scowling at me and I thought I saw a flicker of lust in the corner of his eye. It wasn't exactly encouraging to see still more evidence that he wanted me. It didn't make me want to make the deal any more then I already did. In fact, it lessened my opinion of that course of action by a considerable amount.

"Jacob," I started. He growled and tightened his grip, bringing tears to my eyes.

"No." he said, his voice acidic.

"Will you just listen?" I snapped, not meeting his eyes. Whenever he was doing stuff like this I found it was best not to meet his gaze. It only made him more of a wolfish jerk.

He didn't respond so I continued.

"If you let me go to meet this Jay guy and you don't follow me, then when I get back I'll make out with you."

Jacob's eyebrows rose on his forehead then narrowed suspiciously.

"What do you mean by 'make out'?"

I took a deep breath of air, trying to get a grip on my mouth which was longing to throw a sarcastic comment at him.

"I mean I'll kiss you back." I finally managed to say.

Jacob's eyebrows rose again. Then an emotion raced across his face that can only be described as a combination of lust, greed, hunger, longing, and apprehension with a topping of suspicion.

Mix well and serve with a side of horny.

"Do you promise?" he demanded.

I nodded.

He smirked at me, the lust in his face more prominent now.

"Deal." He growled, a covetous grin appearing on his face.

He released my arm and I clambered out of my bed, desperate to get away from him.

I dodged around Sam and began to look for a fresh t-shirt, something that didn't smell like Jacob and his arousal. Sam had stood there during the entire argument, not saying a word. I had almost forgotten that he was there.

"He wanted to meet you on the beach where Forks meets La Push." Was all he said before leaving the room.

As he opened the door, allowing light from the hallway to spill into the darkened room, I saw his face. He looked exhausted and troubled, like he was working on a math problem he couldn't quite solve.

I opened my mouth to ask what the matter was when Sam glanced sideways at me. He gave me a worn out smile before exiting the room.

I felt Jacob's hands grip my shoulders gently from behind me and his lips on my neck.

"Let go of me." I growled, trying to pull away.

His lips paused on my neck and his hands tightened their grip on my shoulders.

Suddenly, he spun me around until I faced him, a low snarl reverberating through the cramped space before pulling me towards him until my mouth was barely an inch from his.

His hot breath ran across my face as he hissed: "I'll never let go of you, Seth." He paused, his hands creeping up until they were on the sides of my face, forcing me to look into his eyes as they burned in his face, anger and determination in them as he practically shouted: _"Never!"_

Then he crushed his lips against mine, his tongue forcing its way into my mouth, mixing his spit with mine, coating the inside of my mouth with his saliva. He took his tongue out of my mouth only to coat my lips with the same substance he had just filled my mouth with, before kissing them once more. All the while his mouth kept moving, his teeth cutting into my lips as he scraped them across my mouth in his wave of passion. His breath ran across my face and filled my mouth, filling my lungs with the taste of him.

He left my mouth and trailed kisses along my chin and throat until he reached my collar bone. He then moved along it until he reached the area where the neck meets the shoulder, kissing and nibbling the skin.

His hands moved to the top of my pants. He paused, and then gave off a shuddering gasp. He was trying to control his lust and his instinct. He pulled away from me, his eyes closed and breathing in deeply. Then he opened his eyes and he looked me over.

"I'll be looking forward to when you get back." He growled lustfully, reaching out and touching my face. I winced at his touch and he noticed, his eyes darkening with anger.

"Don't try anything Seth, you'll pay for it if you do."

I turned to answer him but he was already leaving. His face was apprehensive; as if he wasn't sure he was making the right choice by letting me go. Or maybe he just wasn't sure if he had done the right thing by threatening me.

"I'll be fine," I muttered when he left. "I'm not a baby."

I left my room, closing the door behind me, and leapt down the stairs.

The smell of cinnamon rolls was still in the air and I saw Emily serving some to Sam and Leah. Both girls were dressed in nightgowns and looked careworn. Sam's face was a little more alive, his eyes following Emily as she spooned out a half dozen cinnamon rolls onto his plate.

_It must be nice,_ I thought_, to have an imprint that doesn't kill anyone who looks at you_.

Leah gave me a brief smile before attacking her breakfast. The clock read two o'clock in the morning so it was impressive she had found the strength to even move her mouth at this hour.

Jacob was leaning against the counter, stone faced. He didn't look up as I entered the room and headed for the door.

"You have two hours." He growled warningly as I neared the exit. "After that I'm coming after you."

I shrugged, grabbing a roll from the counter across from him and heading out the back door. "Sure, sure." I muttered.

"Be safe," He said more softly, looking up at me as I stuffed the roll in my mouth. "I love you."

I didn't answer, only raced for the woods, stopping on the outer fringe of trees as I tried to hold back the tears of guilt that swam up in my eyes.

His words hurt more then I was willing to admit, even to myself. I knew that he truly did love me and that I could only give him hatred and loathing in return. I knew that he couldn't be in command of himself at all times and that he was doing his best to stay in control. But part of me was unwilling to forgive him for an act that he had had no control over. I was that selfish and biased; the result of a lifetime of self-centered behavior. I was trying to like him and was failing miserably. Every time I saw his thoughts they became more possessive and I hated him for it, even though it was instinctive.

I made sure that no one could see me and took off my pants.

I phased before pointing my nose towards the place I was supposed to meet this guy.

The moon hung in the sky above me, stars surrounding it like cold blue diamonds, uninhibited by clouds. Today was going to be one of those rare sunny days. Hopefully I would be able to spend it doing something other than being made to feel like a piece of property.

The beach opened up before me, the water glistening from the light of the moon. I phased back into human and pulled my pants back on before adding the t-shirt to my body. It was a light tan, the same color as the sand that lined the beach. The same color as my coat when I was a wolf. I hadn't thought to bring shoes but this didn't surprise me. I had gotten into the habit of not wearing my shoes if I could help it. They were expensive and I was on my last pair. Besides, if I stepped on something it would heal.

The beach was empty; the only living things were myself and the seagulls. They swooped around on the surf, looking for something to eat, ignoring me.

I was about a mile from the border so I took off, walking at a human pace so that, on the off chance that a human was watching, they wouldn't get suspicious.

As I jogged I watched the gulls fly around me, probably wondering if I was a particularly tasty morsel, I started thinking of one of the most unusual things that I had learned since the day Jacob had imprinted on me.

I had found out that not all thoughts were revealed in the pack. Only those that were the strongest, the less easy to mask. Weaker images, thoughts that weren't meant for communicative purposes and emotions could be hidden through a great deal of practice. Jacob's thoughts about me he didn't bother to try and hide, they were too strong for him to cover up. Embry, Paul, and Jared usually kept their "under-emotions" as they called them, to themselves so I didn't know much about them other than what I knew from my time as a human and what they allowed to get through their mental barriers.

Paul was a jerk, which I had always known, but at times I caught traces of sadness and longing when he wasn't paying attention. I had also found that there was a tender part to him as well. He was sadistic to all of us except to Quil, who he treated like a little brother, always smiling quietly when Quil made some kind of joke and always watching out for him. I might have thought that he had a thing for Quil but I knew that Paul had already imprinted, so there was no chance of him having chosen the poor kid as his mate, thank goodness.

Her name was Laura and she had lived in Oklahoma. He had seen her when he was visiting his uncle and imprinted. She had died a few months later and Paul had stayed alive for the sake of his aging grandpa. He still thought about her sometimes and we all knew that he was planning on committing suicide after the old man's death. It was kind of sad, at least it would have been if he wasn't such a idiot, but it was nice to see that he gave Quil a little of the affection that he was unable to give his dead imprint.

Not that I blamed him, we all loved Quil. He was a happy kind of person that you couldn't help but like. He was full of energy and enthusiasm that was impossible to resist. He had one of those personalities that you only see in movies; he was innocent and funny and never cracked a joke that was laced with innuendo. He had a ridiculously cheerful and sunny disposition and he could put a smile on anyone.

Jared had yet to imprint but I had managed to deduce that he was experiencing "tugs." These were small urges that a werewolf got when his mate was ready to be imprinted on. At first the tugs were weak but they grew stronger over time, pinpointing it to the person that was destined for them. He knew that the person lived in La Push but he hadn't been able to see who it was specifically. Personality-wise he was nothing special. He had a temper, a sarcastic streak and thought too much of himself. A stereotype was the word I had used to describe him to Embry when he had asked me what I thought of the pack at the bonfire the night before.

Embry I knew the most about, but just because I asked him, he would never volunteer that type of information. He came across as a quiet, shy individual who spoke rarely but was braver than a lion in battle and cleverer than a fox in a tight spot. He was extremely quick-witted and intelligent, acing nearly all of his tests.

He loved flowers, especially violets and lilies, and he loved soft things. His favorite color was dark gray and light green and he preferred strawberry ice cream to any other flavor. His favorite type of movie was comedy and he hated video games. These things I only knew from him telling me when I had asked him about himself. I suspected that he had a streak of vanity in him since his favorite color happened to be the same as his coat when he was a wolf. I knew nothing else about him; he always kept his mind carefully hidden.

I had also learned that, in each werewolf, there was a separate identity called "their wolf." It housed the instincts and the ability to transform. It was because of Jacob's "wolf" that he was having trouble looking at me without having an over-powering urge to _*gag*_ mate with me.

I had wondered whether the voice in my head was my wolf, talking me through the ins and outs of being an imprint. But I knew from watching Jacob that an inner wolf was animalistic, it acted purely on instinct. It could be caged, trapped, but it required an insane amount of will power and it was very easily released. Jacob had minor control over his, I knew that it had manifested itself in his possessive behavior and overprotective nature.

The voice was reasonable; there was a certain amount of logic behind everything that it said whereas Jacob's wolf was basically an animal, completely made of emotion and desire and ferocity.

I was jerked out of my thoughts by a smell tugging at my nose, sweet and faint. I glanced down the length of the shore and that was when I saw him.

A lone figure stood on the beach, perhaps a few hundred yards from where I stood, his hands behind his back and his body facing away from me.

I walked up to him until we were about three arms lengths away. I remained still for several minutes, waiting for him to notice me. He didn't, so I finally cleared my throat.

Then he turned and I saw his face. He was a chalky white, as if he had fallen headfirst into a vat of baby powder and it had stuck to his skin. He was beautiful, almost painfully so, with the kind of face you saw on an airbrushed model on a magazine cover and I could tell by the breadth of his shoulders and the prominence of his chest that he had a body to match. His long dirty blond hair was tied back in a loose pony tail and his eyes were blood red.

He was dressed in the sort of outfit that hikers wore: jeans, leather shoes, hoodie. The jeans were worn as well as the shoes, almost as if they had been put to a great deal of use. The hoodie was dark blue and the hood had fallen onto his back. It was unzipped, revealing a white v-neck sweater that was flecked with dirt and… blood?

A vampire.

My body wasn't reacting like it was supposed to. Technically I should have sensed that he was my mortal enemy and attacked, attempting to kill him. Instead, I felt frozen in place, like Jacob had told me not to move.

He smiled at me, showing bright white teeth. I caught a whiff of his scent. It was sweet, but it didn't burn my nose like a vampire smell was supposed to. If I hadn't seen his face and his eyes I might have thought that he was a human.

I was completely freaked out.

The man smiled even wider and looked me over, sizing me up. I tried to phase, I tried to run, and I tried to tremble. Nothing. Nada. Zilch.

It was as if he had turned me to stone like a modern day Medusa.

"Hello," he purred in a voice that had a slight German accent, "you must be breakfast."

**Up next: A Jacob POV!**


	5. Chapter 5 Seth lsure looks hot

**Disclaimer: I do not own Twilight or any of the characters created by Stephenie Meyer.**

Chapter 5 Seth Sure looks Hot When he is Naked

I ran as fast as I could towards the beach, fear for my mate's life driving me forward.

I had gotten a call just a few seconds after Seth had left from someone I had never heard before. He, I was pretty sure it was a guy, had told me that, and I quote, unless I got my oversized dick and ass to the beach, my imprint was going to get killed.

The thought had occurred to me that maybe it was a joke, that one of the pack was just playing a prank on me. It was just the sort of thing that they would do.

Then I realized that there was no way that any of the others could know that Seth was gone and was heading towards the beach, since I had just found out myself a few minutes ago.

Needless to say, I wasn't about to take any chances with my mate's life.

I ran as fast as I could, the pull in my heart directing me like a compass to where my Seth was, his amazing scent showing me the exact path he took.

I increased my speed as the sound of the surf reached my ears which were already strained for any sounds that would indicate my mate was in danger.

I had already imagined all of the worst possible things that could happen to Seth while he was out of my sight in just the first few seconds of agreeing to his ultimatum but now, after the finding out that there was potential danger my imagination was working overtime, conjuring up situations that made me run all the more quickly to make sure they weren't real.

I made it to the beach in record time, phasing as fast as I could and yanking my shorts on. I raced out onto the shoreline, looking for any sign of my imprint.

I had just noticed a pair of footprints in the sand and was starting to follow them when the voice I had heard on the phone came from behind me.

"If you take one more step your mate dies."

I stiffened then turned slowly, feeling panic for Seth and anger at the fact that I hadn't noticed him. I hated missing things that were obvious; it made me feel like an idiot.

What I saw was the last thing I expected.

A boy stood on the surf a few yards away from me, his white-blonde hair with streaks of light blue throughout waving gently in the wind as the surf washed around his bare feet. He was about thirteen, maybe older, and his pale skin and eyes, combined with the hair, made him look sickly and distinctly alien; kind of otherworldly. He was dressed in a plain blue t-shirt that was several shades darker then the streaks in his hair. His hands were shoved into the pockets of his khaki shorts and I noticed a blue tattoo on his arm that was the same color as his highlights.

Well, he wasn't a fan of any other colors in the rainbow, that was for sure.

But the thing was, he was alone, my Seth wasn't with him. I had expected to see some creepy jail escapee or maybe a thug of some sort holding my mate by his throat, a knife against the flesh that only served the purpose of being fondled by me.

The boy looked me straight in the eye with his pale gray orbs and said the weirdest thing I had ever heard come out of anyone's mouth.

"When you have Seth up against the tree, try not to hurt his arm. It's healed all the way but if you squeeze too hard it will get inflamed again." He said, taking one hand out of his pocket and using it pick a piece of lint off of his shirt.

I stared at him, wondering if maybe I was in the company of the president of the deluded fruitcakes anonymous club.

The boy then pointed towards the beach, in the direction the footprints led.

I looked in the direction that the boy was pointing, not knowing what else to do.

What I saw was Seth, walking toward us. I couldn't see his face but his steps seemed slightly shaky.

I longed to run right up to him and hold him in my arms where he would be safe from any danger.

I started to take a step forward when the boy spoke again.

"Don't," He said, his voice warning in tone, "He's just gone through enough stress without having to deal with being crushed to death."

I ignored him and ran towards my mate, glancing over his body to make sure that there was no injury to his precious body.

There was none that I could see, though his face looked somewhat pale.

I reached him in a matter of seconds, capturing his lips in a brief kiss before I wrapped my arms around him, pressing his delicate frame into my over-large bulk.

I sighed, content with the feeling of my imprint's breathing and the faint thud of his heart. The heart that I knew was mine.

His heart was mine.

His body was mine.

Seth was completely and totally mine.

No one else would have him.

I inhaled his sweet scent and nearly gagged as the putrid scent of a vampire came at me instead of the Delicious chocolate and strawberry smell that was the only thing worth smelling.

I growled and began to rub my mouth across his neck, trying to remove some of the stench and causing friction which let off his real scent.

The smell that I wanted to smell twenty-four seven. The smell that I wanted all over my body. The smell I wanted to take into my body as we became one.

I leaned his torso away from mine, glancing briefly at his body that showed lusciously through his t-shirt before leaning in and pressing my lips against his.

The wolf growled lustfully in my chest, desire suddenly rushing through me as my Seth's body unexpectedly folded into my shape, letting me feel the arc of his hips as they curved to accommodate my rapidly growing erection.

The wolf howled in victory. Whatever Seth had seen had made him want me, want to give into me.

Suddenly, my Seth was the only real thing in the world.

It didn't matter that there was a boy that I knew nothing about and could be capable of anything standing a few feet behind us witnessing or passionate kiss.

It didn't matter that he still smelled like vampire, that it was still two months until he turned sixteen, didn't matter that he was a guy.

Nothing mattered but my little mate.

My little Seth.

Suddenly I knew what I needed to do, to make sure that I never lost him.

Seth's bare chest seemed to glow in the light of my bedside lamp, shining from the sweat that covered him as I continued my thrusts.

"Jake..." he moaned, tossing his head back and gasping as I hit the sweet spot inside of him.

"Seth..." I growled as I ran my hand across his lean torso, loving how the muscles were each clearly defined but not as much as my own, enjoying how much I bigger I was then my little mate.

"Harder, Jake, harder." Seth gasped, grinding himself into me, causing me to buck as I complied to his command.

"So tight." I hissed, sweat running down my forehead, beginning to grunt as I thrust in earnest.

Seth began to cry out as I jerked his erect cock with my hand, the feeling of his arousal in my grip bringing me close to my release.

"JAKE!" he screamed, his cum spraying over both our abs as he hit his orgasm.

Then, with a speed that surprised even me, he sat up and attacked my nipples with his mouth, still keeping my cock in his hole. I groaned as I felt his tongue go across each one in turn as he started to bounce, both actions sending waves of pleasure across my body as I gripped his ass and held his weight on my hands.

His hands then went to my shoulders and he maneuvered his hips out of my grip.

"No," he whispered, his voice husky and filled with lust, "It's my turn to pleasure you." Then he began to suck on my neck while he ran one finger over my hard nipple and used the other hand to tickle my groin. He kept it up, continuing to suck and kiss my neck as he alternated his hand between nipples.

A pressure began to build in me as Seth used my shoulders as leverage and quickened his pace. Each time I went into him he sent me careening towards doing exactly what I had wanted to do since I first imprinted on him.

"Seth, babe," I groaned, leaning my head back and letting him suck on my throat with his gifted lips, "I'm close, get on your back."

I heard him snicker into my skin and he only moved faster.

I growled and grabbed his shoulders, forcing him into a laying position.

"I said, lay down." I growled, a grin creeping onto my face despite my efforts to the contrary.

He shrugged innocently, a smirk on his mouth.

I chuckled before reaching out to touch his face, the feel of his skin turning me on almost as much as the sensation of fucking my beautiful, perfect mate.

I paused for a brief moment, even though my instincts screamed for movement, for pleasure, for Seth. I looked down at my mate, feeling love rise in me like a volcano.

I loved my little mate more than life itself, more than my pack, my family, more than my own life. He truly was my all, the center of my universe.

His big gray eyes, almost black but with flecks of lighter gray across them, looked back at me with desire and hunger. He wanted me almost as much as I needed him.

I ran my hand through his short, inky black hair, loving how soft and smooth it was under my fingertips. Then I leaned in and kissed his full lips, my tongue instantly dominating his as we kissed briefly, but passionately. Then I pulled away and looked at his torso once more, feeling myself hardening even more than I already was as I inhaled his sweet scent.

He had the perfect body for me. Small, not completely fragile, but delicate enough to warrant the protection I so desperately wanted to give to him. A nice six pack that just yelled to be licked, a sculpted chest that was just right, and a build that folded into my shape like we were made for each other.

He smirked at me as I began to thrust into him again. Then his smile vanished and he replaced it with a moan that nearly undid me as I went across the sweet spot again.

I began to really pound him, the sound of our sweat covered skin slapping together creating the perfect background music.

"Claim me, Jacob." He shrieked as he came once more without my even having to masturbate him.

I was finished at the sight of my mate's ecstasy.

I threw my head back and screamed my imprints name as I-

I snapped awake, gasping for air as I shot into a sitting position.

I was in Seth's bed, its owner curled up into a ball beside me, looking absolutely mouthwatering with his tight body with only a pair of shorts and a thin white t-shirts. He looked even more appetizing when he was clothed in real life, than when he was naked in my imagination.

The wolf growled appreciatively, forcing me to look at the way his body was in just the right position for me to sink my already hard cock into his amazing heat.

I scrambled out of the bed, desperate to put some distance between me and my mate's body before I raped him in his sleep.

Hmm...that would make such an awesome scene. His terror and pain fading as he gave in to me while I- no, I wouldn't think like that, the wolf was restless enough without my over excited imagination helping him.

I didn't want to hurt my mate which I knew I would, if I took him against his will. He would struggle and it would only make me and my wolf angry. And it wasn't smart to be near the alpha when he was upset.

The wolf was instinct, he was passion, he was desire and he was rage. Every emotion that had to do with sex was my wolf. He was used to being obeyed and he took what he wanted at the moment he wanted it. That was why he was furious at having been denied his mate for so long.

Whenever I got angry, it was as if my mind went into overdrive and the wolf took control.

Every second I was with him was a battle to save my Seth from getting raped.

Every time I was with him it was as if all my hormones went off the chart, my instincts screaming at me to pound his perfectly formed ass until I had no more cum left in my oversized balls.

His scent was a heroin, begging me to take him, to make love to my wonderful mate. He smelled amazing, like chocolate covered strawberries, that made my mouth water with desire. His room was filled with the intoxicating smell, making my head sin with lust and need and it wasn't helping me fight my wolf's desire to claim his...my mate.

The alpha growled at being separated from his imprint and forced me to take a step forward. As I did so Seth moved slightly in the bed, moaning in the process.

Crap.

The wolf roared with need, forcing me to move forward as I clenched my jaw and fists, trying to fight my gradually rising sex drive.

_You're fighting a losing battle,_ the wolf said, _Just give in, you know you want it. Besides, why should you wait a few months for what we both want? Why should we not have him just because Sam said so? What do we owe him?_

_We owe him Seth, I thought back, He protected him when I was too concerned about what others would think. When I didn't care that I was feeling the tug._

I had been feeling the tugs for months before Seth phased but I had ignored it, laughing at him behind his back because I was scared that if I showed too much affection I might actually imprint on him and be branded as gay.

To tell the truth, I had always been attracted to him with his serious manner and gray eyes that seemed to see past your skull and right into your brain but I had been terrified of my feelings for him.

Yes, I, the mighty alpha, had been afraid of a little kid that I could have held down with my pinky.

I had known perfectly well that it was Seth that I was going to imprint on but I had hoped that, if I ignored him, it would fade and I would be attracted to someone a little more normal.

And preferably female.

But the wolf had known that it was Seth that I was meant to spend the rest of my life with and I had always picked him out of the crowded cafeteria subconsciously, my eyes always looking for him whenever I went into history and he was in the classroom across the hall.

Our separation during school wouldn't last long. I would make sure that our schedules were rearranged so that we could spend as much time as possible together before the mating.

_Yes,_ thought the wolf, _the mating that should take place right now._

I winced as I felt the desire go through me once more. I felt like Smeagol, fighting my evil side in order to save someone I cared about.

_Are you sure that I'm Gollum? _The wolf's voice was persuasive,_ how do you know that he doesn't want it too? Maybe he's afraid that if we take him forcefully he'll like it? Maybe he just thinks that having sex with another guy will brand him as a freak._

The thought of Seth, crying in the bathroom after someone bullied him for kissing me caused my heart to both ache with sorrow and burn with anger at the same time.

My Seth was returning to school today and if anyone mocked, derided, or even touched my little mate, I would kill them. I felt my wolf growl in agreement and I allowed myself to close the gap between myself and the edge of Seth's bed.

I looked at his body as it lay in a tight s-shape that gave me a hard-on a porn star would have killed for.

I lay myself gently on my side, facing towards the wall like Seth was.

I reached out and touched the side of his neck, loving how his skin sent waves of electricity throughout my body.

I leaned forward and pressed my lips to the nape of his neck, tasting the skin with the tip of my tongue and feeling his pulse underneath.

He moved slightly underneath me, causing his ass to rub against my crotch, sending waves of lust and need though me in a shock wave that caused the wolf to scream in agony at not having his mate.

Seth moved still more, practically grinding himself into my too-tight jeans that housed my erection that was straining against the cloth, threatening to break out.

I gasped as lust rushed though me like the tide, his body calling out to me, begging me to make it mine, to mark his body in such a way that no one would ever try to take him from me.

My mind felt like it was being filled with cotton, obstructing my thoughts. I couldn't concentrate, desire was making it hard to think and my hand went out against my will and touched the exposed skin between his shirt and shorts, reveling in the texture of the warm flesh.

_Take him._

Then, like in a movie, I found myself remembering what was said earlier that week. At the beach with Jay and Seth.

And the promise I had made to Sam to keep his little brother safe.

I had promised that I wouldn't hurt my little mate. And if I did it would just end up with him hating me and I couldn't bear that.

FLASHBACK

"Excuse me," said the boy as I continued with my assault on Seth's downright amazing lips. I ignored him, pressing my tongue against my mate's teeth, loving how his hands twisted in my hair, drawing me closer.

Holy crap!" the boy suddenly shouted, "The vampire's back!"

I let go of Seth and pushed him behind me so that I could protect him, my eyes flying wildly over the apparently empty beach, looking for the bloodsucking bastard that had been so close to my mate.

"Well now" said the boy calmly. "Now that the kissing is over with, I suggest you sit down, this will take some explaining."

I glared at the boy who was already walking towards the fringe of trees that began the forest.

"Cocky bastard," I muttered as I clenched my fists, trying not to phase with my mate so near to me.

I looked at Seth as he watched the boy go.

"You don't have to go if you don't want to." I said gently, rubbing the shoulder nearest to me in a soothing manner.

Seth muttered something that sounded dangerously like "Has it ever mattered what I wanted?" before he headed after Blue Hair.

I sighed and followed after him, wishing that he would stop rebelling and just let me protect him.

Ha, fat chance of that happening in the near future.

I didn't trust the blue-haired boy, he seemed really weird and he gave me no incentive to follow him. But I would go wherever my mate went. Be that school, Canada, the woods, or even death.

We entered the woods, my hand holding Seth's as we came into a small clearing a few yards from the beach.

"Okay," the boy said, "I'm going to make this brief, I'm just going to explain the basics."

I nodded, putting my arm around Seth's shoulders and pulling him to my side.

He grumbled and pushed away from me, trying to separate his body from mine.

I wasn't about to let him do that, there was still the danger of the kid turning out to be an enemy and, if that was the case, I wanted Seth in my arms where I could protect him. I growled warningly and tightened my grip.

Out of the corner of my eye I saw him shoot a glare at me.

"For starters," said the boy, "my name is Jay, sometimes known as James, and that vampire that you just saw was named Caius. He won't be coming back to the states for the next hundred years so you don't have to worry about him. He nearly wet himself when he saw Jacob."

I stared at him, confused.

"Caius can see potential. It's a special gift of his and he could see that you had the potency to kill him single-handedly if he hurt Seth." He explained, crossing his arms and relaxing his posture.

I couldn't help but feel pleased that I had the potential to kill a vampire by myself, though I wasn't really surprised. I was capable of anything when it came to Seth.

"So," I said, feeling in a slightly better mood, "What did you want to tell us?"

Jay stared back, his look confused. Then his face lit up.

"You seriously don't already know about Dominates and Submissives?" he sounded highly amused at this and it bugged me to no end.

"No I don't," I growled, working hard to stop the tremors that were racing through me. "Why don't you elaborate before I rip your blue hair out by the roots?"

Jay snickered once more, then put his face in a more serious expression.

"Well," he said, "for starters, this entire relationship should have never happened."

I growled at his denial that Seth and I didn't belong together.

Jay didn't seem surprised at my reaction and continued as if I had never spoken.

"In most cases," he said in a manner that made me believe he had rehearsed what he was about to say many times, "A male shifter will imprint on a human female and will protect, cherish, and pretty much obsess with their imprint. There are cases when a male shifter will imprint on a human male and, in this case, the shifter will form a bond with their imprintee that is stronger than the normal imprinting. This is mostly to rectify the fact that the imprinter has been raised to like girls and would otherwise fight the imprint, resulting in a great deal of pain on both sides."

He glanced at us, probably checking to see if we had gotten what he had said.

I gestured for him to continue, looking down at the top of Seth's head and marveling at how soft it looked.

"The cases of male shifter on male human are rare and often end in heartache," said Jay, running his hand through his blonde hair and making stand up on end, giving him a particularly deranged look. "But the cases of male shifter on male shifter are even more unheard of. In these cases, one of the shifters will become the Dominate," he pointed at me. "And will be a typical werewolf imprinter, caring for his mate, protecting him form danger, and become extremely possessive of him just like in a more normal imprinting.

Jay glanced at Seth, apparently sizing him up.

"The submissive has the better side of it though. They have a female wolf living inside of them and the female is basically the mate of the wolf and she will call out to her dominate, resulting in an imprint on both sides. These relationships are happy ones since they're each madly in love with each other."

I looked down at Seth, wondering if he was just fighting the imprint. In that case it would be easier to break his defenses down.

"Unfortunately," Jay said to Seth, causing my head to snap up to look at him. "You are different than most shifters, Seth. You cannot imprint."

I breathed a sigh of relief; there was no chance of losing my Seth to an imprint.

"Your wolf is a female, true enough, but she is different than the other female wolves. She does not imprint on others and she is there merely as a guide, to help you through life rather than an instinctual entity that governs your inherent aptitude, like Jacob's."

"Which brings us to Jacob." he turned to me, "I should say ahead of time that an alpha imprinting on a human male is almost unheard of, with only one or two cases that are known. But an alpha imprinting on another shifter is impossible. Or it was."

I waited for him to continue.

"An alpha is responsible for carrying on the wolf gene even more so than the normal shifter. Therefore he will claim his mate almost as soon as he imprints to ensure that the imprinted will bear a werewolf child as soon as possible. In these cases the alpha will become protective and possessive of his imprint so that there is no chance of the object of their affection being lost to another human."

"So, long story short, my imprint is three times as strong as the normal imprint?" I asked.

Jay nodded.

I smirked to myself, pleased that I was unique among those who were already different.

"Oh, and one more thing. Seth can become pregnant."

I stared in shock at him, then felt my heart soar as an image of Seth, his stomach round with my child, his face glowing as he rubbed it gently with his hand as I held him close to me raced through my mind.

It was all I could do to not rip his clothes off and claim him right there, to put the seed in his body that would allow him to conceive my child. Our child.

"If you rape him in the middle of the forest, he'll hate you for the rest of eternity." Said Jay, calmly.

I stared at him, completely lost for words at how he had read my mind.

"How do you do that?" I asked, awe creeping into my voice.

"Do what?"

"Guess what's about to happen."

He smiled brightly.

"I'm a bit unique for a human," he said, his chest puffing up a little bit and his eyes shining with pride. "I can see the future and I sense imprinting facts."

I looked at him in surprise.

I decided to test him.

"How many fingers-"

He cut me off.

"Three, and in a second you're going to hold up five." he sounded smug.

I was about to say something when Seth suddenly spoke.

"Why is it that I didn't smell the vampire when he was on the beach? And why did my instincts freeze up when he looked at me?"

Jay yawned, looking at a watch on his wrist.

"That's because you're a submissive. You smell differently to vampires and vampires smell different to you. You're not meant to fight so you aren't made for killing vampires. Sorry."

Seth paused and I saw him bite his lip as the words sunk in. It was a good thing that we had never come across a vampire in the recent months, Seth might have been hurt.

"Why do you have a bite mark on your shoulder?" he asked suddenly.

I saw Jay wince and glance down at his shoulder, where a mark I hadn't seen before peeked around the collar.

"That's the mark of my mate."

I looked at him in confusion before glancing at Seth who seemed to be thinking hard.

"You're on the run from an alpha aren't you? You're one of the cases where an alpha imprints on a male."

Jay nodded sadly.

"Yes, I was imprinted on and claimed by Ephraim Call, the alpha of the La Posta Indian Reservation in California."

"Embry's dad? You're the reason he left his wife and son?"

Jay shook his head.

"Ephraim left because he had just found out that he was the chief of the La Posta pack. He had to leave without them because he wanted his son to join the La Push gang. He imprinted on me when I was visiting California with my grandma and grandpa."

I noticed a tear escape his eye as he spoke.

"He told me that unless I let him claim me he would kill my grandparents. They both died a few weeks after he had his way with me so I left. They were all I had in the world so there was nothing holding me there. I know that Ephraim is after me and I'm trying to stay on the move so he won't find me. I don't want to go back to being his submissive."

He wiped his eyes and began to turn away.

"Have a nice life you two." he said over his shoulder.

I was about to leave with Seth when James suddenly turned.

"Jacob," he said, a fierce determination burning in his eyes. "Promise me you won't take Seth against his will. I know what that feels like and if you rape him I can see him going through more heartbreak than should be allowed."

We looked at each other for a long moment, his hands clenched into fists at his sides, my arm still around Seth. I felt admiration well up in me. I could see in his eyes that what he said was true. If I took my mate against his will than there would be no chance of us having the happily ever after I so desperately wanted.

I nodded.

Jay gave me a watery smile before starting to leave.

Seth called after him.

"Jay," he said, straining against my grip. "Will you be okay? I mean, how do get money for food and stuff."

Jay smiled sadly and tapped the side of his head.

"You'd be amazed at how easy it is to win at poker when you know exactly what will happen."

With that he left, leaving us alone.

I turned to Seth, admiring his beautiful features.

"Submissive," I murmured, liking the sound of it as I touched his face. "Seth, my submissive."

He glared acidly at me before turning away and walking away.

I growled and ran up behind him, sweeping him up in my arms before heading towards the house where I could put him to bed and make sure that he didn't leave.

***END FLASHBACK***

I pulled myself away from Seth's sleeping form and began to do push-ups, the monotonous task somewhat keeping my mind off of what was laying in the bed, where he could be taken so easily.

As I continued, sweat dripping off my forehead and running down my neck, I could feel the wolf growing slowly stronger at the thought of his submissive.

I knew it would only be a matter of time before he took control and hurt my Seth.

I also knew that the wolf wasn't afraid to hurt his mate and would do so if Seth ever defied him again. I could only hope that Seth wouldn't do anything at school, my control was weakening and I didn't think I would be able to stop the wolf if I caught him touching someone.

Seth would soon be mine, whether he like it or not.


	6. Chapter 6 The Changes

**Disclaimer: I do not own Twilight or any of the characters created by Stephenie Meyer.**

Chapter 6 The Changes

A boy of fifteen with purple shadows under his eyes stared back at me as I looked myself over in the bathroom mirror.

He had slightly protrusive gray eyes, spiky black hair that was a mortal enemy of brushes and hair gel. He had a fairly decent face, though somewhat young in appearance and his body was okay, too, lean, with a fairly nice abdomen that showed all of his stomach muscles.

But the thing that was confusing me was the lack of hair.

I was sure that a few days ago there had been some curly black pubic hair around my crotch and hole. Now it was completely smooth, not even an eight o'clock shadow was visible on any part of my skin, even on my armpits. My face hadn't needed shaving and it was this that had alerted me to this mysterious change in my body.

I ran my hand across my jaw, feeling how completely smooth my face was. There wasn't a trace of hair to be found on me except for the rebellious clump on the top of my head. Hell, there wasn't even any on my knuckles.

Okay, I was officially freaked out.

"Seth! Get your ass out of the bathroom or you're going to be late for your first day of school!" Sam's roar on the other side of the door made me jump and I nearly slipped on the floor that was still covered in water from my shower.

"You know, the freaking world won't end if I'm a few minutes late!" I shouted back, feeling my temper rise. Who was he to tell me what to do? Why should I listen to someone who was going to let...no, I wasn't going to think the deal he had made with Jacob

I wasn't about to phase in the bathroom of all places. Jared and Quil would never let me hear the end of it. That was another reason I was so worried about going to school today. I had either one or both of them in every one of my classes, making my life one of the best cases of complete and utter despair ever been recorded.

Those two had recently been put under instruction by Jacob, to watch me and, needless to say, they had been looking forward to humiliating me when Jacob wasn't around to stop them.

The high, mighty, and overly-hormonal alpha had been unwilling to let me go out of his sight in the outdoors, let alone in a school, so I knew that he would have me watched at all times.

Perfect.

I turned my attention back to the mirror and wished yet again that I knew why my body was behaving like this, changing in subtle ways that made me look even more feminine than I already did.

But, like so many other things in my life, I had no real, satisfying answers to my questions.

Jay had given me the hows last night but he hadn't given me the why's and this bugged me.

There were so many questions I had wanted to ask him.

Why did Jacob imprint on me?

Why was I able to have kids?

Why were all signs of puberty vanishing from my body?

Is there any way to get out of this mess I'm in?

But these were questions I would probably never have the answers to.

I sighed, running my hand through my hair as I looked at the bruises that adorned my arms and neck.

The one on my arms were from when I had gotten out of his grip and made a run for it but he had caught me, pinning me to a tree. He had squeezed my arm so hard that it was back to stinging whenever I touched it.

The one on my neck was from where he had bitten me after he had finished violating my mouth's privacy. It was almost gone but it was a reminder of how determined Jacob was to have me.

Like I needed another thing to remind me that I was the alpha's property, or was going to be, however unwillingly.

I was even more pissed about the knowledge that I was able to have kids. The look on Jacob's face when he had heard the news was like a cross between a kid on Christmas day and a sadistic rapist.

Jacob might think that he was being fair to me but I could honestly say that he was either the biggest jerk in the world or just plain stupid. But the idea that he was both was more likely.

I winced as I remembered the animalism and possession in his growl as he attacked my lips. I was still furious at him for marking me, however temporarily, so it was a good thing that he hadn't been around this morning.

I had woken up alone in my bed, alone for the first time since I had phased and would have liked this fact if not for two other annoyances.

One: I had my first day of school today. Well, first day as a werewolf anyway, and I wasn't exactly looking forward to breaking up with Kim. She was a good friend, if a little talkative, and I didn't like hurting her, knowing that she would be hard-pressed to find another boyfriend with her braces.

Two: I had a major headache. I mean seriously, it felt like a hangover or something. I had never actually gotten drunk but I had come across Jared when he had consumed a few thousand too many drinks. I had to drag him to my house so Sam could look after him and his migraine the next day while we were on patrol together was enough to give me one.

Shoot, the last thing I needed on my big return to the realm of mortals was a jackhammer in my head and a three hundred pound werewolf raping me in the school hallway.

But the fates apparently had other plans, seeing as I had more of both than I would have otherwise preferred.

I sighed and wrapped a towel around my skinny hips, securing it tightly in my left hand before turning off the light.

I opened the door only to see Jacob waiting for me, leaning against the wall a few feet in front of me, his hands in his pockets, his jaw set in a sort of half-smirk, half-scowl. He had a pair of worn jeans and a dark gray t-shirt that showed every muscle of his massive torso in high definition.

Jeez, was it really so hard to wear a shirt that wasn't three sizes too small?

"Hey baby," he murmured, walking towards me, his eyes racing over my body and stopping at my hand as it kept the towel from coming apart. He licked his lips and I gulped, feeling fear rush though my chest as I saw the lust in his eyes.

"Don't call me that." I snapped, tightening my grip on the piece of cloth and resisting the urge to shiver as he neared me.

He continued until he was a few feet from me, reaching past me and closing the open bathroom door before putting his hands flat on the wooden surface just a few inches from the sides of my head.

I backed into the door instinctively as he moved his head forward, realizing my mistake too late as I saw that I was trapped by his arms. His lips brushed mine briefly before he ran them across my cheek as he made his way down to my neck, his hot breath running across my skin and making me shiver.

"My mark is fading." he grumbled into my skin as he kissed the exact place that he had bitten me.

"Thank god," I muttered, clenching my hands into fists and wishing that I had the strength to actually cause some damage to his stupid weight-lifters body.

Then, before I could close my mouth, I blurted, "Wouldn't want Paul to get the wrong idea."

His head flew back up until he was facing me again, rage in his pitch black eyes. His hands came down and gripped my shoulders, his grasp so tight I could feel my bruises moving aside to make room for some new ones.

"What?" He shouted as he shook me, causing my hand to bang against the door several times. I could feel a goose egg start and vanish each time it left the wooden surface, only to be replaced by another when my head came back down.

"I was being sarcastic," I yelled back, shoving against his chest, trying to get him off me. "Get a grip you stupid jerk!" With that I pushed him away and stormed into my room, slamming the door behind me.

I seethed as I went around my room, grabbing a pair of boxers and an outfit that would state: I am a person, not a sex toy.

I managed to find a nice navy blue t-shirt and a pair of white khakis when Jacob kicked open my door, his eyes dangerous as he shoved me against the wall.

"I should fuck your tight little ass right now." He muttered darkly, his right hand sliding down my shoulders until they were on my hips while his left moved to the center of my chest, keeping my body against the wall.

I gulped and started to squirm as he began to move the towel that was still on my waist aside. This was the last thing I wanted and I wasn't going to go down willingly.

"Such a nervous little submissive," He murmured, his breath rushing across my face as he moved his mouth towards mine. "Don't worry, I'll be gentle."

He chuckled and I could feel his burning hand just inches from my cock." At least until you beg me to move faster."

Oh crap.

"Jacob!" Sam's voice made me jump again but I was glad to hear it none the less. He stood a few feet away from us at the entrance to my room, shooting daggers at Jacob.

"What?" Jacob snapped, his left hand still holding my torso to the wall and his right still in the towel.

There was a moment of silence as Sam took in the scene in front of him, me in nothing but a towel and Jacob with his hand inside of it, the alpha's intentions painfully obvious.

"Your dad wants you home." Was all my brother said before casting him a warning look.

A growl went through Jacob's chest but he removed his hand from the almost completely exposed region between my legs.

I breathed a sigh of relief but it was caught in my throat as Jacob brought his hand up and gripped my face, forcing me to look at him as he glowered down at me.

"We'll finish this later, baby." he growled threateningly, kissing me roughly before leaving, muttering to himself under his breath.

He paused at the door, glancing at me in a way that made me feel even more naked than I already was.

"I promise," he growled, a smirk on his face before he left.

I waited until I heard the front door slam before I allowed myself to breathe again.

I slid down the wall until I was in a sitting position, practically hyperventilating as the realization of how close I had come to having him touch me in the last place I wanted him to came over me like a tide.

I sat there for several minutes, trying to relax or at least stop breathing like I had just spent an hour underwater, both of which I was in the middle of doing.

_Good luck with that,_ I thought. _How can anyone relax when you have a dominate who wants nothing more than to rape you until you don't have the guts to even breath without his say-so._

Dominate.

The title suited Jacob. Everything about him was dominating and possessive. And not in a good way.

I leaned my head back and closed my eyes as I waited for my heart to stop its hyperactive beat. It finally got bored of thumping out the beat to Hot n' Cold and calmed down.

I groaned as I got to my feet and collected the clothes I had dropped and pulled them onto my body before throwing my bag over my shoulder. I was still sore from last night and I was almost positive that what had just happened hadn't been the best thing for my bruises.

Oh well, there was nothing I could do about it, except pray that I would get run over by a truck. Not that it would kill me; just make me black out long enough for my bruises to heal.

Phft, I should be so lucky.

Or better yet, why not ask for Jacob to get run over, then maybe he would go into a comma for a while and give me time to escape.

I finished with my preparations and staggered down the steps in a manner that would have led a stranger to believe that I had been enjoying myself a little too much at a bar the night before.

"Morning, sleepy-head." Emily's voice was bright and cheerful and I blessed her with a weak smile before attacking the dishwasher, looking for a clean bowl.

After reminding me to take my lunch money from the counter and wishing me a good day at school, she left to get ready for the day, humming to herself as she went.

She was so lucky to have such a positive outlook on life. The only outlook I was able to have was ridiculously negative.

Then again, she had a bright future to look forward to, whereas I only had a life of submitting in my future.

"Billy said that he's giving the pack a ride to school so be sure that you're outside when he arrives," Sam said absentmindedly as he scanned the paper as he ate what looked like his eighth bowl of cereal.

"Anyone dead?" I asked, yawning as I poured the cereal and milk into a bowl usually reserved for mixing cookies and other confections.

"Not yet, but there will be if I catch you and Jacob going at it again." His voice was accusing and threatening as he looked at me over the paper.

If I had been in wolf form my hackles would have raised to their full capacity as I glared at him.

"Believe me, Sam," I growled acidly while I gave him a glare that should have burned a gaping hole through his head, "If I could stop Jacob I would, but he kisses me, I don't reciprocate."

"That's not what Jacob said last night. He claimed that you kissed him of your own free will." The accusatory quality in his voice became more pronounced and I thought I heard some disappointment behind the carefully layered tone.

I scoffed.

"Yeah right, he ordered me to kiss him back. There is no way I would ever do it willingly."

Sam stared at me and he seemed about to believe what I was telling him. Then his eyes narrowed.

"That's not what he told me."

I snorted as I shoved another spoonful into my mouth, chewing it up before swallowing.

"Jacob gives orders as often as he draws breath, he probably didn't even realize he was making me kiss him." I said, my voice sounding thick through the wad of goo in my mouth that was all that remained of my spoonful of cereal.

Sam's face softened and he returned to his newspaper, murmuring something that sounded like "Probably."

We ate in silence for a few moments when Leah came bounding down the steps, her hair tied into tight pony tail that made her head look smaller than it normally did without the wavy black hair that usually framed her face.

"So," she said, grabbing a bowl and pouring herself some breakfast. "How'd it go last night? I mean, with the Jay guy."

I shrugged, my mouth full of cereal and a lump growing in my throat as I remembered the look of pity Jay had thrown at me when he was leaving.

I swallowed the lump and the cereal before answering, grabbing my empty bowl and rinsing it out in the sink. Emily was very adamant about people cleaning up after themselves and it wasn't a good idea to get her angry when she had a werewolf husband who would happily crush anyone who upset her.

"It went okay, I guess, he explained about how I'm a freak among freaks who already freaks to other freaks." I wasn't able to keep the bitterness out of my voice but I did make a considerable effort, even if it was in vain.

I felt Leah's arms wrap around my shoulders from behind me in a comforting embrace.

Suddenly, the pressure of what I knew I was going to have to go through came crashing down on me and I burst into tears, turning and burying my face into Leah's chest as I bawled, soaking her front completely in the liquid incarnation of my despair.

I didn't want this, I didn't want to live my life in submission to a person I abhorred, a person who wanted my complete and total compliance to whatever depraved, twisted thought came into his perverse mind.

I didn't want to be labeled as gay, which I wasn't. I didn't want to be known only as Jacob's property, I wanted to be known for my own choices, not my stupid dominant's mistakes which I knew must be numerous.

Leah rocked me back and forth in a soothing manner as I cried until I had no more tears left in my eyes, after which I just gave off the occasional dry sob as the sound of Leah's comforting heartbeat calmed me.

I finally pulled away and gave her a watery smile.

"Thanks," I croaked, "I needed that."

She smiled affectionately before giving me a pat on the back and returning to her now soggy cereal.

I wiped my eyes and grabbed my lunch money. I did feel much better now that I had given release to some of the turmoil inside me.

"So," Sam's voice made me jump again, he sounded awkward so I knew he must have witnessed our display of affection as he stood in the doorway to the kitchen. "What did you think of Jay?"

I shrugged as I grabbed a glass from the cabinet and filled it with water from the tap. I gulped it down and winced as my eyes watered, my werewolf body using the moisture to get my red eyes out of their puffy and dry state and giving me back my energy.

"He seemed okay, I mean, he didn't kill me or anything."

I glanced at myself in the microwave, somewhat impressed at how I looked exactly like I had before bawling. One of the perks of being a werewolf. I didn't even feel emotionally drained which I would have been under normal circumstances as I turned back and walked over to the table, grabbing my bag from where I had thrown it under the table.

"The only thing that bothered me," I said as I shuffled through it, making sure I had everything. "Was that it seemed way too convenient that he knew everything about imprinting and his only excuse was that he had some sort of special gift. I mean, honestly, he seemed more like a grown-up stuck in a kid's body than someone who watched his grandparents die and got raped. He didn't look like he'd gone through anything worse than deciding what to have for lunch."

"Yeah, he's quite the character." Sam chuckled.

I glanced at Sam as he leaned against the counter, having changed positions without my knowledge.

"You've met him?"

Jay didn't look old enough to have been around when Sam phased.

He nodded as he looked into the distance with an expression on his face that was partly nostalgic, partly amused.

"Yeah, he talked to me when I first phased. He's the one who told me everything about werewolves. Except he said that he was from another universe."

I looked at him, confused. Why did Jay lie?

He glanced at me, an understanding look on his face.

"I know, I was confused when I found out. Turns out no one know anything about him; he changes the story every time you ask him. He's been around forever, since werewolves first came into existence and he hasn't aged in all that time. We think that he's some kind of spirit, perhaps the soul of the first werewolf or Ephraim Black, Jacob's ancestor, and he goes around explaining things about the supernatural world to people who don't have anyone else to tell them."

"He did say that someone named Ephraim raped him so maybe he just likes using himself in his stories."

Or maybe the story he had told me was true. It wouldn't surprise me, seeing how he was related to Jacob.

Sam shrugged, moving towards the door after glancing out the window at the sound we both heard. The sound of a truck coming down the gravel road towards the house. I grabbed my bag and followed him, calling out to Emily that I was going.

Leah shouted a goodbye from the kitchen and I heard her pull out her phone then the click of buttons as she did one thing or another with her gadget.

I wished I had a cell phone; I should start hinting to my family that I want one for my birthday.

Not that I would actually be able to enjoy my birthday, seeing how I would be, however grudgingly, involved in other activities with my alpha and his dick.

I shuddered as I thought of the things he had imagined since imprinting on me. None of them were especially appealing and I knew that once Jacob got an idea in his head he wouldn't let it go until he had fulfilled it.

Lovely.

"Jay is certainly an enigma. One that'll probably never be solved." Sam continued as he opened the door and we stepped out onto the porch, just in time for a red truck to drive up the driveway. "I wouldn't worry about him too much."

The majority of the pack was in the back of the pick-up, all laughing and talking, happy as any bunch of werewolves could be on a school day.

Jacob was in the passenger seat, his eyes burning into my head as I avoided his gaze. His promise was still fresh in my mind and I wasn't about to provoke him when he hadn't had time to cool down.

His dad, Billy, was driving. I felt him cast a disapproving glare at me but I ignored him, I didn't have any respect for the man who had a hand on cursing me with Jacob by helping him come into existence.

"Have a good day, don't get into fights, get good grades, the usual junk." Sam chuckled, ushering me off the porch.

"Sure, sure." I muttered as I saw Jacob start to open the cab door.

Such a gentleman. Hah, I would sooner die than accept courtesy from a guy who had threatened to rape me not twenty minutes ago.

I ran up to the back, tossing my backpack into the heap of school bags in the middle of the back of the truck before he was able to get fully out of the cab.

"Don't bother." I muttered to him as I heaved myself over the edge before siting myself between Embry and Quil, crossing my arms in a defiant manner.

I heard Jacob slam the door and saw him walk around the truck until he was on my side, his look murderous. I gulped and felt the color rush out of my face. He certainly wasn't coming over to give me a pat on the back.

"Jacob, get back in the car." Billy's voice was stern but I detected a hint of fear in his voice, like he had never seen his son act like this. But, for once, Jacob listened to his dad and climbed into the passenger seat, grumbling.

I resisted the urge to smirk, knowing that he was probably watching my every move through the rear view mirror.

Instead I contented myself with a small smile and joined in with the rambunctious conversation as best I could, carefully avoiding all subjects that had to do with girls since I knew Jacob would be furious if I talked about that kind of thing.

Stupid Imprint.

As we drove I glanced around at the pack as they disregarded my attempts to be a part of their chattering.

I felt ignored and I found this fact extremely weird. Usually I was fine being left alone but being brushed off by the same people I had shared my inner-most thoughts with, however unwillingly, I found somewhat ominous.

Quil suddenly turned to me, his smile bigger than ever as he spoke.

"So, you want a boy or a girl?"

I stared at him in shock, not able to say anything.

How the hell did he know that I was able to have kids? Did Jacob tell him? Was he the only one, or did the whole pack know?

I saw that the conversation had stopped and they were all looking at me, Paul with a smirk on his face, Jared looking kind of sickened, Embry with his usual even temperance, and Quil expectant, the same smile still on his mouth.

"Er," I stammered, at a loss for words, "What are you talking about?" Might as well play innocent.

Quil's eyebrows furrowed confusedly and he frowned slightly.

"Jacob said that you can have kids, it was all he talked about this morning and he said he couldn't wait for-"

I felt the color drain from my face and a shiver race up my spine. Just what was he planning?

"That's enough Quil," Billy and Jacob growled in unison over the roar of the truck, apparently having listened to the whole brief exchange.

Quil frowned still more but turned away, obviously baffled by my denial of being able to have kids.

Quil loved children and they loved him, he was the big brother of nearly everyone from the ages of twelve to one in the whole of La Push and he just couldn't understand why anyone wouldn't to have one. I knew that one of the major things he was looking forward to about imprinting was having kids.

We rode the rest of the way to the school in silence, me trying to get my head together, and the other members of the pack giving me glances that varied from grossed out to pitying.

We finally parked and I grabbed my bag from the heap and hopped down, knowing that Jacob was probably still mad at me for defying him.

Just what I needed, a stern talking to.

"Hey," his voice sounded softer than it usually did, instantly putting me on the defensive. If he was talking to me like someone he cared about as a person rather than a piece of ass, it didn't bode well for me.

"What?" I snapped irritably, shouldering my backpack more securely on my shoulder before making my way into the crowd of students as they filled into the schools double doors. I made it to my locker and opened it, depositing several items into it and making a mental note to clean it out as soon as possible.

"I'm sorry."

Annoyance got the better of me and I turned around to face him, crossing my arms across my chest. He really did look regretful, his head tilted slightly to the side in a way that made him look even more pathetic than he usually did.

"About what?" I growled, "Imprinting on me? Threatening to rape me? That I'm not yours? Tell me Jacob Black, just what are you really sorry about? "

His eyes flashed and he trembled slightly.

"Never speak to me that way again." His voice shook as he moved forward slightly, his hands in fists at his sides. "Never say that you aren't mine, Seth. You belong to me and don't you ever try to believe differently."

I felt my temper rise but I managed to not attack him...for the moment. "Well, that's the beauty of it," I said coldly as I shoved a stack of books into my backpack, "I already do."

I grabbed my bag and stormed towards my first class. I was just glad that it wasn't history so I wouldn't have to deal with Jacob who was walking right behind me, making me feel uncomfortable in addition to being pissed off.

When I entered the class Jacob's hands went around my shoulders, pushing me against the doorway in full view of the people in class and in the hall. A small crowd began to gather outside the door, staring at me with wide eyes.

"Just remember Seth," he snarled in a low voice, his mouth inches from mine, "If anyone touches you or you touch them, I'll kill them and fuck you over their dismembered corpse."

I gulped and he kissed me possessively before leaving me to face the stares of my classmates and the small crowd that had temporarily parted to let him through.

I felt my face turn bright red and I was just glad that Kim wasn't in this particular class; I didn't want her to think that I was leaving her to be with Jacob.

I sat down and quietly seethed in my chair as the others in class kept glancing at me with the same emotions the pack members had visited on me earlier. Even the teacher looked at me more than she usually did.

When class let out I was more pissed than I had ever been in my life.

I shoved my way through the throng of students and stomped out of the room in a fury and into the rapidly filling hallway as I made my way to my locker, ignoring the looks I was getting.

Honestly, gossip must be the most popular form of communication in La Push. Now everyone knew about me and Jacob.

Shit, Damn, and other curse words.

I was walking down the hall from my locker to Algebra, wishing I had a shotgun with which to blast Jacob's balls off, when several things happened.

I saw Kim running towards me, an excited look on her face as she picked up speed while she wove through the crowd. She must not have heard about the incident outside of class since she seemed excited to see me.

If she had heard she would have avoided me, and been crying her eyes out. She didn't handle breakups very well.

I saw Jacob coming down the hall towards me, his eyes on Kim's back as she neared me, his thoughts painfully etched on his face. He was obviously thinking: _That bitch, I'm going to kill her._

I saw Jared brush past me, a smirk on his face as he tripped Kim so she went flying into my arms. This surprised me so much I lost balance, falling onto my back with her top of me.

We stared at each other in shock for a full two seconds before a blood-curdling roar of anger shot through the school hallway and I saw Jacob running towards us, shoving people out of the way as he neared us while we lay dumbfounded on the floor in a very suggestive position, murder in his eyes.

Oh crap.


	7. Chapter 7 The Unexpected

**Disclaimer: I do not own Twilight or any of the characters created by Stephenie Meyer.**

**Chapter 7 The Unexpected**

Time seemed to slow as Jacob neared me and Kim as we lay petrified on the floor. And in that time I managed to make a four-part plan.

Step One: get Kim off of me. She was the main reason that Jacob looked like he was about to commit a murder and a sexual assault in the next few minutes, so I needed to remove her from on top of me in order to give her a chance to get away. I doubted Jacob would want to kill her after he had finished with me, so there was little chance that she would be killed.

Then again, Jacob was known to carry grudges.

Step Two: somehow get Jacob to calm down without getting raped. The most impossible part of my plan but still attainable. I hoped.

Step Three: find out what the hell is wrong with Jared. I mean, what did I ever do to him? Did I ever mock him? Not out loud. Had I ever tried to embarrass him? He certainly didn't need my help.

Step Four: get the hell out of here. That was the part of my plan that I was looking forward to the most.

I initiated step one by throwing Kim to the side, making myself vulnerable to Jacob's impending ravishment of my body but at the same time getting her out of his range. He didn't even seem to notice, just kept coming at me as I lay on the floor.

Then he pounced, landing on top of me with his hands on my shoulders and his knees on my thighs, effectively pinning me to the ground.

I struggled against his grip for a few seconds before I risked a glance at his face.

What I saw scared the living shit out of me.

His eyes had a dark, hooded look to them but at the same time there seemed to a smoldering passion and affection in his rage filled face.

Crap.

"I thought I told you that I wouldn't let anyone touch what's mine." His voice low and husky.

"It was an accident," I squeaked.

"Sure, sure," He said acidly.

I whimpered as he lowered his mouth to mine.

God, did I just whine like a fucking puppy? I was a complete and total pussy if I was going to let him intimidate me.

As his mouth neared my lips, I turned my head so that he caught my ear. It was then that I saw that Kim was staring at me in horror, shock written all over her face. Shit, now she knew.

Jacob growled and bit down on my ear, effectively bringing my attention back to the monster on top of me as his hard-on pressed into my leg, the smell of his arousal suffocating me with its musky scent.

If I wasn't already being deprived of air by Jacob's bulky form on top of me, limiting my supply of oxygen to a bare minimum I would have held my breath. As it was, I had to content myself with gagging mentally.

I gasped as the pain from my ear as he bit down harder shot through me like a shock wave. It was then that I realized that the hallway was deathly silent; you could have heard a pin drop.

His hand grasped my chin and forced my face back to his.

"I'm going to enjoy this," he whispered, leaning his mouth down to my ear, "Though I doubt you'll be able to stand afterwards." He drew his head back, a sadistic smirk on his face.

God, I hated him more than anything. Though my fear for what was coming was rapidly overcoming my loathing.

He began to kiss me before running his tongue down my cheek, tasting me.

"God, Seth" He groaned into my ear as he neared it, "You taste so good."

Well, he wasn't one to go for originality over functionality. If it worked for how he was feeling, he would use the same sentence over and over again, no matter how annoying or repetitive it might be. I must have been told I tasted good more times than an ice cream cone.

"Mmm..." he moaned as he sucked on my neck. "I want you so bad."

At least he had added some different sentences that had been induced by sexual arousal to his fairly limited repertoire, I could give him that.

His right hand trailed down my chest and stomach until it stopped at my belt buckle.

"Jacob..." I said in what I meant to be a warning tone but it came out as a whimper. Again, I mentally reprimanded myself for begging to a person who had made my life hell.

"That's right," he whispered as he undid my belt, "Say the name of your Dominant. Scream my name, baby."

"Jacob!" I screamed as he squeezed my thigh, his nails cutting into my leg. My mouth clamped shut as I realized I had followed his orders without him even imposing the alpha voice. Good god, I really was a submissive. And that fact pissed me off to no end

"Seth," he whispered, pausing as he looked at me. Another, stronger wave of his aroused scent hit my nostrils as I saw the hooded look come back into his face and I began to struggle against his grip.

"Stop!" I shouted as I tried to yank my lag away from him.

I saw his eyes flash and, faster than I could comprehend, his head shot forward and clamped onto my neck, where the shoulder meets the neck, biting down until he broke skin as I screamed in agony.

The smell of blood, my blood, filled my nose along with the scents of an extremely turned-on dominant werewolf. If I could have breathed I would have retched all over the floor.

I heard a sucking noise and realized that Jacob was drinking my blood.

"So good," he moaned as he continued to suck the warm liquid that I knew was probably pooling from my newest mating mark.

The sicko actually liked how my blood tasted? That was just plain wrong! He was like a bloodsucker or something!

The need to throw up came over me in a fresh wave.

I felt my skin come back together thanks to my werewolf ability and Jacob pulled away, his smile showing that even blood didn't alter his blindingly white teeth.

"Now the fun really begins," He whispers, his hands coming back to my pants in order to finish removing them.

"God, I can't wait to feel myself inside you." he growled, possession and dominance in his voice as he undid the button. "And make you mine."

I was still frozen in terror, unable to move. Either that or my treacherous submissive body was working against me and giving in to its dominant alpha.

Why wasn't anyone helping me? Where they afraid of Jacob? Did they think that I wanted this? Why couldn't I move?

I didn't dare look away from him as he began to slide my pants down to see what the reactions where on the faces of my classmates. I might have been able to tell how they were reacting by their heartbeats if not for my own which was hammering away in my chest.

Why did I ever think that I could somehow get out of this? My life was too horrible for my problems, namely Jacob and his dick, to just vanish like a wisp of smoke. So why had I deluded myself into thinking that I might be able to have a normal existence? One where I lived happily ever after with someone that I liked. Maybe Kim and I would've ended up together if this had been a normal world. It was certainly probable, if she had stopped talking so much and got a little more grounded in reality. But no, I had to get stuck with a werewolf who had a billion too many hormones. Why was I stuck with this life? Stuck in a world where I was only meant to be claimed and dominated by Jacob Black, winner of Pervert of the Year?

As long as I was asking questions, I might as well ask the one I really wanted to know the answer to: _WHAT THE HELL WAS HIS PROBLEM?_

Jacob looked at me, his black eyes somehow looking even darker than before.

"I love you, Seth," He whispered.

"Don't," I sobbed, only now realizing that I was crying. I tried to stop but couldn't as I felt a slight draft around my crotch as he moved the pants down my shaking legs.

"STOP!" Someone shrieked.

Both of our heads whipped to the side to see who had spoken. Kim stood on her feet, visibly scared but still defiant, her hand balled into fists at her sides.

Jacob was silent for a brief moment, obviously sizing her up.

"Why?" He finally said.

"Because he doesn't want this." Her voice shook as she gestured at our position. She had guts, something I would have never guessed from a person who was obsessed with clothes.

Jacob growled and slowly got off me, giving me a chance to scoot back a few inches. After he had gotten to his feet he began to move forward, his body shaking slightly as he neared the terrified Kim.

"And just how would you know that, little girl?" He sneered as he walked up until he was about a yard from where she stood.

"Because he's my boyfriend," She snapped, apparently trying to rally her courage.

Bad answer.

Jacob's shaking visibly increased and he raised his hand as if he was about to slap her. Only I knew that if he did, he could potentially kill the defenseless girl.

"Jacob, stop!" I shrieked, scrambling to my feet in an attempt to somehow save her.

His hand hesitated for an instant and I thought/hoped that he would lower it. Then his face hardened and his hand came swooshing down towards Kim, who didn't even have a chance to cover her face with her arms.

NO! _(A/N I was going to leave it here but I knew you would all hate me for a very long time.)_

A split second before his hand made contact with her face, Jared came out of nowhere and stopped his arm with his hands. I froze, standing stock still in the middle of the infinitely less crowded hall as the voice whispered to me: _don't interfere, you'll only make it worse._

Needless to say, I did what it told me to do, I wasn't an idiot. At least, not as much of one as a certain dominating alpha I could mention was.

Jacob's head whipped around and stared in shock at Jared. The former bully wasn't known for protecting anything but himself and those he cared about. Usually he let innocent bystanders alone and only interfered if he knew the person and had some sort of affection for him or her.

"Jacob, stop." Jared's voice was calm but I saw that he was shaking somewhat.

"Why?" growled Jacob, his head turning back to Kim as she cowered against the locker she was pressed against. "She touched my mate." I noticed that his arm muscles were flexing even more, showing that he was putting up more resistance against Jared's grip. Kim flinched and cowered even more, her panicked glance going from Jared to Jacob in complete confusion. Her eyes flicked to me and Jacob growled, bringing her attention back to him.

Moron, he couldn't even handle someone looking at me. Stupid jerk.

"It was my fault," Jared said, his voice shaking with an emotion I couldn't place. Shame? Guilt? Constipation? "I tripped her."

Jacob turned back to face his friend and appeared to be about to argue when he saw Jared's face. I didn't know what he saw, seeing how Jared's head was turned away from me. Whatever he saw seemed to convince the alpha and he pulled his hand away, sending one more glare at the still shaking Kim before turning back to me.

"Get Quil, Embry, and Paul and tell them that we're taking the day off. We're going to meet at Sam's."

Jared nodded, obviously avoiding Kim's confused stares.

Jacob grabbed hold of my arm and pulled me along with him towards the exit.

**LATER**

As soon the pack had assembled Kim was whisked away by Emily into the kitchen as Jared got up in front of the whole pack. Leah was the only one absent, and I wondered if she had even gotten the message. She was supposed to be at school but I hadn't seen her. She had been behaving oddly, always texting or talking on her phone but always hanging up when I walked in whatever room she happened to be in at the time. I made a mental note to confront her as soon as possible.

"Kim is my imprint."

I felt a small piece of my heart break but ignored it.

I mean, it's not like we ever even had a future together. Plus, she would sort of be my sister so I would still get to hang out with her. Still, I had hoped that, if I had ever gotten out of the mess I was in, we might have become more to each other.

There was a round of congratulations and a few wolf whistles from Quil and Paul.

Embry and I stayed silent, though Embry had a small smile on his face that seemed to be about something other than the subject at hand.

"So," said Paul, sidling up to Jared and throwing an arm around his shoulders. "When are you going to sleep with her?"

"Shut up, Paul." growled Sam in a warning voice, though there was a trace of amusement in his voice as Jared's face went red.

"What?" Said Paul innocently, looking at Sam with wide eyes. "That's what imprinting's about isn't it? I mean, you pile drive Emily all the time, why shouldn't Jared be allowed to do the same?"

I noticed that Jared flinched as Paul used the word pile-drive.

Sam growled but a blush colored his cheeks so I knew Paul had hit home.

"Yessir," he continued with a smirk, "We all know how she likes it: deep."

I heard Quil snicker and even Jared had a smile he managed to hide somewhat.

Sam always hid his more personal interactions with his wife from the pack but we all knew that Emily liked it rough. Hearing her scream "harder, Sam, harder" at night and sometimes after lunch was enough to give us that much information.

"I heard that!" Emily shouted from the kitchen.

"Don't be ashamed, Emily, I like it hard and deep too." Paul called back, a smirk on his face.

I heard her snort and a quiet giggle I recognized as Kim's came at us from the room, mixing in with the sound of a beater as Emily made cookies.

"So Aaron tells me." She called back.

Aaron was Paul's one time boyfriend and we knew that he had slept with Paul multiple times. Aaron dumped Paul when his responsibilities with the pack took precedence over their "play time". That had ended their relationship and made him hate gay people. That was probably why he always induced the other members to tease me, the only person he considered gay who wasn't his alpha. Paul had been the all too willing bottom and Aaron had pounded his ass frequently before the break up and we all knew that the usually independent boy had liked it. A lot.

Paul's grin vanished and he turned tomato red as we all roared with laughter.

"Good, one honey!" Sam called out to her, his voice shaking with laughter.

As Sam and Embry continued to tease a still blushing Jared and an obviously embarrassed Paul, I noticed that Quil had vanished. He always behaved oddly whenever Aaron was mentioned, almost as if he didn't like the idea of guy-on-guy action.

If that was the case, I totally agreed with him.

I started to get up when I felt Jacob's hand on mine.

"Where are you going?" He growled.

"Out." I muttered, yanking my hand away and heading for the door.

I went outside and went up behind a tree to change. After putting my clothes in a pile where I could retrieve them later I phased, following Quil's scent. Normally I would have just followed him in human form but it was rare to be alone in wolf form so I took the opportunity. There was something quieting about being alone in wolf mode, the way you felt at one with the forest, like the animal in you made you feel peaceful in your natural home. Otherwise, there were other people in my mind so I didn't often get to enjoy it.

As I made my way through the woods I enjoyed the dim mood that the trees created. It made it easier to wallow in my self-pity.

My life sucked.

It would always suck, as long as Jacob was in my life. And he was obviously planning to hang around for a while. Say, forever?

Like I said, my life sucks.

After I had been walking for about ten minutes I felt a rippling in the air that betrayed the fact that someone was phasing.

I swear, if Jacob was coming after me-

The memory hit me with all the force of the entire pack tackling me.

***MEMORY, ?POV***

I sat in my room, nervously awaiting the arrival of my mate, my life.

He walked in, dressed in nothing but a pair of boxers that were slung low on his hips, a small portion of black pubic hair visible in between the elastic band and his belly button.

Paul smirked as he caught my ogling. I couldn't help it, he looked amazing half naked.

"Like what you see?" he said seductively, making my heart twitch with desire as I nodded eagerly.

"Good," he growled, his tone playful as he swaggered over to me.

I felt my face burn and turned away to hide my blush, I didn't want him to see how ugly I looked when my face was bright red and blotchy from embarrassment.

His hand went to my chin and he gently turned my face back to him. He looked at me for a long moment, his gaze so intense I could feel my face heat up even more.

"You know," he said quietly as he gently leaned me back to a laying position on the bed and then straddled my hips. "I don't like it when you hide your face when you're embarrassed; you have the most beautiful blush I have ever seen and it's a crime to hide it."

I felt my face gain new amounts of blood under his compliments. Who knew that Paul could so...adoring? With any luck, I would be the only one who ever saw this side of him.

He smiled and leaned down, gently brushing his lips against mine, his warm, sweet-smelling breath going across my face which was now in full on blush mode. I closed my eyes as he continued to brush his lips across my mouth, never letting them stay in the same place too long. I felt his hands on the side of my face and he began to rub my cheekbones in slow, rhythmic circles. I felt the blood in my face rush down to my groin as his mouth left mine and he brushed them across my cheek, leaving trails of gentle warmth until he reached my ear. Once at its destination, his mouth began to whisper strange things, things that had no meaning.

"What are you saying?" I whispered breathlessly, not opening my eyes.

"Those are called sweet nothings, baby," he whispered before gently biting on my ear.

The pressure was too much. Here I was, straddled by the most amazing guy in the world as he whispered things that turned me on more than I had ever been before in my life, and I've never even kissed him.

"Paul," I moaned as he took my whole ear into his mouth and began to suck, filling my head with the sounds of his mouth, the slurp of his cheeks as he suckled my ear, the rush of his breath, the moans he gave off as he ran his tongue over the curves of my ear.

He pulled away after a few seconds.

"Hmm?" he asked, his eyes running over my face.

"That was without a doubt the most amazing ear job I've ever gotten."

But I still hadn't kissed him. And I wanted to. More than anything.

He grinned down at me and a sudden rush of boldness went through me and I threw myself forward, throwing my arms around his neck and latching onto his lips with all the passion I had in me. He staggered back from my unexpected attack and his knees slid off the bed but managed to fall onto his feet. I wrapped my legs around his waist, running my tongue over his bottom lip as he stood.

It broke my heart when he didn't respond. I kept kissing him, desperately hoping for him to kiss me back.

His hands went to my shoulders and he gently set me on my feet. I had to crane my neck to try and reach his mouth but he pulled his head away from me.

I nearly cried when he looked at me with the most sorrowful expression I had ever seen.

"Baby," he said, his voice calm but his hands shaking. "Don't ever do that again."

He hated me. I felt the tears come into my eyes but I blinked them away.

He sighed and put his left hand on his hip before setting his forehead in the palm of his other hand.

"I don't want to hurt you, but if you kiss me again I'm not going to be able to hold back."

I realized what he was saying and looked at him hopefully.

He continued, still in his I'm-thinking-hard pose.

"I'm trying not to attack you and fuck your brains out right now, plus I have a boner just from your smell." The tent in his boxers was enough to show that. How had I not noticed that he was hard before?

I stood up and walked to him, wrapping my arms around his neck and putting my face against his chest, listening to his heartbeat.

"Then why don't you put it to good use?" I said, trying to sound seductive and failing miserably. "The boner, I mean."

I felt him stiffen and for a second I thought he would push me away. Instead, to my complete and total ecstasy, he wrapped his arms around my shoulders, pulling me into his warm, comforting embrace.

"Are you sure? Do you mean you're ready to be mine?" He sounded nervous and I found that beyond cute.

I leaned up and licked around the base of his ear, getting me a moan from Paul as he leaned his head back.

"I already am," I whispered as I bit his earlobe. "I always was."

He growled and pulled his head back, causing me to whine at the loss of contact with his flesh and my tongue.

I was instantly pacified as he caught my lips in a heated and passionate kiss. He gently laid me back onto the bed.

He pulled away, his eyes glazed with lust. But then he hesitated and for second I thought he was going to change his mind.

"These clothes in my way," He growled, fingering my shirt.

"Then get rid of them," I moaned, "I hate this outfit and I went commando so I don't care."

He smirked at me.

"Gladly," He said huskily before ripping my shirt and pants off my body with such possession and animalism I felt like I was going to explode if I didn't feel him inside of me soon.

After exposing my naked body to the night air he attacked my nipples eagerly, causing me to cry out from the unexpected wave of pleasure that racked my body.

He pulled away, concern on his face. I almost cried due to the loss of his mouth

"What's the matter, baby?" he said, looking worried. "Did I hurt you?"

I almost laughed; he just looked so funny and cute when he was worried. His eyebrows always turned up at the ends and he would chew the inside of his cheek, giving him a look that would melt a heart of stone.

"No, Paul, you just startled me," I said, running my hand through his hair as he rested his chin on my chest, his whole head rising whenever I took a breath. "I'm just not used to you being this...affectionate."

He looked relieved and pressed his lips over where my heart was, leaving butterfly kisses as he trailed himself towards my mouth. He finally reached my lips and kissed me, his tongue ravishing my mouth.

He pulled away and looked at me as I lay underneath him, naked as the day as I was born.

"Get used to it, baby," he growled before kissing me.

I moaned as he began to suckle my neck, causing me to buck against him. It was then that I realized that he wasn't wearing the boxers any more. When did he take them off?

"Are you ready for me baby?" He moaned into my skin.

I nodded, unable to speak from nervousness. He pulled back and gave me a brief kiss on the mouth. Then he broke away and looked at me searchingly.

"Are you sure that-?" I cut him off with my lips.

"I'm more than sure." I breathed into his mouth.

He pulled away and gave me a beautiful smile, flashing his white teeth at me, visible even in the semi-darkness that surrounded us.

"Do you want me to prepare you?"

I shook my head, the need for him overwhelming the fact that I would probably feel like hell in the morning if I wasn't stretched.

"Just go slowly."

He grimaced. "Baby, once I get inside you there is no way I can be gentle. My wolf wants you and he doesn't care about your comfort, he will hurt you and I won't be able to stop him."

I bit my lip, trying to think of a way around the problem when another thought hit me.

"We'll need a condom." I said, running my hand across Paul's broad chest and eight pack feeling the smooth skin as I spoke,

Paul closed his eyes and groaned, though whether from my hand's administrations or from the suggestion I couldn't really tell, though I hoped it was the former.

"We won't be able to use protection."

I blinked in surprise.

"Why not?"

He opened his eyes and looked at me, his expression sorrowful.

"I need to mark you as mine." That wouldn't surprise me; my body felt like it was on fire with desire for the bronze-skinned god on top of me.

"What do you mean?" I asked, moving my hands down to his thighs. He moaned again, confirming my secret hope that my hands were the cause of his noise.

"For the first time I need cum inside you, for our scents to mix, that will tell other wolves you are mine, only mine"

I bit my lip hard then came to a decision.

"Then I give you permission to cum inside me." I said, nodding my head.

He looked at me hungrily, then with a hint of pain and I realized that he was fighting his wolf's urge to mate with me.

"Baby," his voice sounded strained, "If I come inside you I'm basically marking you as mine. I'll become really, really possessive and protective of you, plus I don't know if you could become pregnant, I don't know how these kind of things work for werewolves and I'd rather not risk it."

I was about to tell him that I would be fine with that, actually I would be thrilled to be marked by him, to be his mate. And a possessive Paul was a sexy Paul in my opinion.

"We could just wait until-"

I grabbed his face and forced him to look at me, feeling my desire burn inside me like a fire.

"Paul Lahote," I growled. "I love you and I'm willing to put up with whatever crap this mating thing brings, be that a baby or a butt load of pain, just get into me and _start pounding._

You're sure?" he said, still looking apprehensive.

I rolled my eyes. "Yes, moron, I'm sure, now claim me as yours."

He leaned backwards without answering and grinned as he towered over me, the lust and need in his face turning me on even more than I already was. His black eyes raked over my body as it lay completely exposed beneath him, causing me to blush with pleasure at his obvious approval.

How had I never noticed how beautiful his eyes were? Why had I denied myself, and him, for so long? I had known that I had always wanted this, deep down inside. I had wanted him to claim me in exactly the way he was about to, on his bed. Right where I belonged, in his house, with him always beside me, protecting me.

I loved him more than life itself and I was willing to do anything for him, I would go through fire and ice, flood and tornado, just to see his beautiful eyes looking down at me with such love and desire.

I looked down at his throbbing cock and gulped. The thing was _huge_.

As if reading my mind Paul smiled encouragingly at me.

"Don't worry, it'll fit."

I took a deep breath and nodded for him to continue.

I groaned as he teased my entrance with the head of his cock.

"Please," I pleaded as his hardened member entered into me, feeling like I was being impaled with an amazingly soft, amazingly firm hot poker, "Take me."

For one long minute we looked into each other's eyes and I saw nervousness, confidence, worry, lust, and love flash across his face.

Then I saw the wolf take control.

He grinned at me like a piece of meat, ready for consumption as he gained a predatory quality to his black eyes.

"I've waited too long for this," He growled.

He slid the head in, causing me to buck instinctively.

"You belong to me." He snarled as he slammed all the way in, causing me to cry out as the pain went through me.

He began to thrust, not giving me a chance to adjust.

The pain was incredible, I didn't think I was going to last, I was being split in two.

Then the sensation of being filled, the pleasure that covered every inch of my body like the sheen of sweat that already covered me like a film went through me and I moaned, "Paul,"

He smirked at me as he moved faster, bringing back a little of the pain but sending fresh waves of pleasure through me.

"That's right, baby, say the name of the one you belong to. Say the name of your mate."

A pressure began to well up inside me, making my body tense as the sensation mounted and grew.

"PAUL!" I screamed as I came.

"Mmm..." he moaned, "So tight and wet and warm; I can feel all of you, babe."

I gasped and closed my eyes as his thrusts picked up in intensity.

"God," He muttered, his eyes half closed, "I'm close, so close."

I felt a sharp pain go through my neck and my eyes flew open. Paul had bitten my shoulder, marking me as his, claiming me so that all would see I belonged to him. I could see along his muscular back, see the sweat that coated his dark skin, see each thrust as he mercilessly pounded me.

I felt his cum go into me, warm and smooth, like a jet of warm water on a freezing piece of skin.

I groaned and leaned back onto the bed.

He smiled dreamily at me and I gave him a tired grin in return.

"Mine," he whispered, his thumb brushing my cheekbone. "All mine."

I reached up with what little strength I had left and touched his cheek.

"Yes," I said as I began to drift into sleep, "All yours."

***END MEMORY SPOV***

I snapped out of the memory, shock going through me as I recognized the one the memory belonged to.

What. The. Hell?


	8. Chapter 8 The Marking

**Disclaimer: I do not own Twilight or any of the characters created by Stephenie Meyer.**

**Chapter 8 The Marking**

_What the hell was that shit about, Quil?_ I bellowed mentally. _Why are you and Paul screwing each other?_

I felt Quil jump. The retard hadn't even waited to see if anyone else had phased before starting on his little fantasy.

Einstein he was most certainly not, the idiot.

_Seth?_ He squeaked, shock going through him as he realized that I had seen everything his perverse mind had come up with.

_No,_ I snarled mentally, feeling the hackles on my neck rising as Quil began to panic, fear of me telling the pack about his lust for Paul, _it's the Easter bunny. What your problem man? Why are you Paul's fucking bitch?_

_It was just a dream_. He stuttered, his explanation ringing true as he showed me a mental image of his neck, which wasn't marked like in the dream.

_Phft,_ I scoffed, _what does that prove? It would have healed by now._

Quil's thoughts began to fill with pain, a sorrow that I couldn't quite pinpoint the cause of. _A mating mark doesn't heal,_ he whispered. _When the dominant claims his mate, he marks their neck to show other wolves that he's taken and it stays._

_Since when do you know so much about it?_ I growled.

_Jacob told us on the way here,_ Quil thought, an image of an extremely excited alpha telling his pack members about what Jay had said as he helped his dad out of the wheelchair and into the truck.

It didn't escape my notice that in the memory, Billy's face was set in a scowl as he listened to his son's chattering. Obviously he didn't approve in his son's choice of mate.

Well, sucks to be him. Or me for that matter.

_At least you know that you have someone._ Quil thought sadly, _I don't have anyone._

_I would gladly trade with you,_ I snapped, annoyed, _I'd take being alone over being ravished by Jacob every stinking second of every single stinking day in a heartbeat._

_Well, at least you know that he loves you._

_Yeah, as a piece of ass for him to fuck. _I snarled in reply.

_No, he loves you,_ Quil insisted, _I've seen it in his mind when you're not around. It kills, him Seth, it kills him to hurt you. But he has no choice, the wolf-_

_Yeah, yeah,_ I snapped, cutting him off mid-thought, _the wolf is the reason to blame; I've heard that excuse before._

_I wish you could see his mind like the rest of us do. He wants you to be happy, Seth; he wants to be with you, he wants-_

Under normal circumstances I wouldn't have interrupted him again. It was just that his words were pissing me off really, really bad.

_That's just the thing!_ I shouted mentally, ignoring Quil's flinch as he saw all the things Jacob did to me on a regular basis. It's all about what he wants. Not what I want!

_Shouldn't you want the same thing? You guys are meant for each other._

I growled, anger filling me.

_NO WE ARE NOT!_ I screamed at him, snarling on the outside, loud enough for Quil to hear from wherever he was.

Quil plowed on, refusing to back down.

_If you're not meant for each other, then why is it that he's terrified of losing you, huh? Why is it that he's willing to be a monster in your eyes, as long as you're safe?_

_Because I'm something he can't have and it pisses him off,_ I yelled back.

_No, he loves you,_ Quil insisted.

_I'll believe that when he stops threatening to rape me in the middle of the hallway._

Quil was silent for a moment.

_Give him a chance, Seth, you might find that he's willing to wait a bit longer if you just let him in a little more. Maybe kiss him back a few times, tell him your thoughts, stop being so damn resentful and just accept your fate._

_I don't give a fuck about fate,_ I growled, _fate is for people too lazy to make their own future._

An image of another one of Quil's dreams came at me. Unlike the first, which was purely pornographic, this was a simple kissing scene in the middle of a meadow, Quil on top of a peaceful -and fully clothed Paul. The latter letting the former guide the kiss as Paul squeezed the younger wolf's ass in a possessive, but loving grip. Then there was a house, Quil sitting on Paul's lap in a rocking chair, watching two children play as Paul gently kissed the crook of his mate's neck, right where two crescent scars lay on the junction between the shoulder and the neck. Quil's mating mark.

I snorted as the memories faded, but my anger slowly started to vanish as I felt his despair wash over me. He really wanted to be Paul's submissive, and the dreams were causing him nothing but grief.

Blech.

Gag.

Barf.

I felt a small amount of annoyance break through the clouds of agony in Quil's mind. Well, at least he wasn't totally in lust with Paul.

_What makes you say that? _Quil asked, trying to get control of his tormented mind.

_Well, _I thought, trying to think of something funny to say to help lighten the mood,_ if you were, you would be so consumed by grief you wouldn't have heard anything I said. You'd be on the floor, howling in agony._

There was a moment of mental silence.

_I don't get it,_ Quil thought, confusion in his thoughts.

I laughed, both on the outside and inside. Neither did I.

I felt the waves pulse through the air, disrupting our painfully short mental conversation. We'd have to talk some other time.

_How 'bout we meet for dinner, I can tell you everything?_ Quil asked hurriedly, trying to wrap up before whoever was phasing had time to listen in.

_Sure, sure,_ I said, laughing, _how about six o'clock at Black Beards?_

_Perfect_, Quil said as the new person joined our mental chat room.

_'Sup, ladies? _Sam said, his stomach full of cookies and his mind of Emily.

_Speak for yourself,_ I muttered. _And sick, Sam, I don't need to have another episode of "making out with Emily" playing on repeat in my head._

Sam chuckled and shoved another memory of a particularly steamy moment with his wife at us.

_Eww, gross,_ Quil laughed, stop it or I'll show that to Leah.

Sam gulped and we felt his panic.

_You wouldn't,_ he whimpered.

_I would_, Quil thought, revealing how good he was at covering his emotions. One second he was in more pain than my mouth after being kissed by Jacob, the next he was as happy as a lark, joking around as if he hadn't a care in the world.

But Sam and I both knew that he could follow through with his threat very, very easily.

Leah did not like recollections of intense make-out scenes and least of all when it concerned her sister-in-law. The last time Jared had shown us a kiss-fest with some girl on the Rez, she had attacked him, screaming: that was sick, you stupid son of a bitch, keep your crap memories to yourself!

Needless to say, Leah wasn't a huge fan of romance

Leah wasn't an extremely girly girl. She avoided make-up like the plague and always managed to be on patrol whenever Emily wanted to go shopping. Thus limiting Emily's choices to either me, who could never tell when she was planning a trip to the mall like Leah did, or Sam, who even though was more than willing he had to work. So, as should be expected considering my luck, I was always picked to go.

A few months ago I would've killed to get out of one, now; I wanted nothing more than to go with her, to get out of La Push for some time alone with my always cheerful sister-in-law. But, naturally, Jacob thought that there was too much danger in the outside world so I was resigned to a life of staying in one place. Jacob had said, however, that I could go on the condition that he went with me.

Ha, as if that wasn't the purpose of going.

If Emily was the mother of the pack then Leah was the big sister. She was extremely protective of her pack, with the obvious exception of alpha, but she still didn't like being in the minds of a bunch of over-hormonal teens, especially if they were fantasizing about knocking up her friends.

At least she was allowed to have friends.

_Well,_ I thought, bringing myself back to the conversation at hand, _what do you want?_

_Jacob wants to discuss some stuff at the house,_ Sam thought, still wary of Quil who was creating a mental image of Leah with steam pouring out of her ears, her face twisted into a crazed expression as he spilled the beans.

Yeah right, he probably just wanted to make sure Quil and I weren't mating in the forest like a pair of rabbits.

Sam chuckled and I saw him glance over his shoulder at the house. He was on the outskirts of the forest about a hundred yards from the porch where Jacob stood, pacing back and forth, his brow furrowed as he muttered to himself.

_Probably, he said that you need to come home right now._ He paused for a second, an image of Jacob, shaking with anger when I had knocked his hand away and left the house earlier went through his mind before he continued. _Or else._

_Why didn't he phase himself? _I asked, more out of annoyance than curiosity.

_Oh, he's having some thoughts he didn't think you'd appreciate,_ Sam said, his laugh sounding strained as he blocked an image from us.

_Hmm,_ I thought, feeling my danger alarm start to beep, _that was nice of Jacob. Almost...considerate._

What was he planning that he didn't want me to see?

Next thing I knew, my mind was blasted by Rascall Flatts crooning voice and Lady Gaga's annoying beats roared in my head as both Sam and Quil blocked me out of their minds.

_What the hell?_ I shrieked, dropping my head and covering my ears with my paws, trying to block out the noise, _anything but country and pop!_

"Life is a Highway" and "Poker Face" vanished and were replaced by another tune. "Unnadicted" by Emily Osment.

I would have found it funny that they both picked the same song if I wasn't so annoyed.

_Okay, _I growled, _soft rock I can handle._

Sam and Quil snorted with mental laughter.

_Where did you hear that?_ Sam asked the chocolate wolf.

_I heard it on the radio this morning, _Quil replied, apparently amused, _you?_

_Same, _Sam chuckled, _we must have been listening to the same channel._

I growled, disliking the fact that I was being blocked out by a song that would have put me to sleep in a minute. It was pretty catchy, though, and kind of melancholy.

For some strange reason that I couldn't explain, it reminded me of Jacob.

I tried to stop that train of thought but it continued anyway.

Like the girl in the song, Jacob was addicted. He needed me like he needed air, like he needed food and water, and no matter how hard he tried, he couldn't get un-addicted. No matter how much he wanted to, he couldn't move on, couldn't let me go.

Shit, the last thing I needed was to feel sorry for him. Damn you, Emily, and your stupid songs.

I forced myself to think of Jacob along with the words of "Robot" by Miley Cyrus.

Ah, much better. I wasn't his tool, something for him to use at his pleasure. I would never let myself be tamed. Hah, another Cyrus song came to mind.

_I thought you hated pop_, thought Quil, starting to make his way towards the house.

_Just Lady Gaga,_ I thought as I followed his example and started to walk in the direction of home. _Her music annoys me._

Quil growled playfully, letting "Just Dance" flood his mind.

I snorted, responding with a rousing chorus of "Round and Round" by Selena Gomez.

_How do you manage to remember all the names of the songs and the artists?_ He asked absentmindedly, his thoughts on an all too important squirrel that was crossing the forest floor in front of him; _I can hardly remember the choruses, let alone the title._

I shrugged mentally, I didn't know, I had always been able to. It just something that was easy for me.

I saw Sam as I neared the house, keeping the song "Telephone" at a bare minimum as he sang it to himself.

_Please,_ I thought as tolerantly as I could without bursting out into a fit of laughter, _no more, my IQ is dropping by the second._

Sam laughed. _Tonight I'm going to make you sing "Paparazzi" on Rock Band._

I snorted. Him and what army?

_I'll get Emily to bribe you with a pudding bowl at the party._

What party?

Owl City and Taylor Swift roared into my head.

_AARRGGHH!_ I screamed, _fine, keep your stupid secret, I'm phasing!_

_What about clothes?_ Sam thought over "Fireflies" and "You Belong with Me"

_Stashed 'em in the bushes._

_See you inside. _He said with a laugh, his mind vanishing as he phased.

_Sure, whatever,_ I muttered as I let the jet of ice wash over me. I made my way over to the bushes after I had phased and pulled my clothes back on, just in time for Quil to appear, dressed in a beige t-shirt and ripped jeans.

"Are we still on?" He asked as I tightened my belt buckle.

"Absolutely" I said as I walked beside him to the house.

Jacob stood on the porch, his arms crossed and his feet spread apart in what he obviously meant to be an intimidating pose.

Ha, it made him look like a Darth Vader wannabe.

I closed the distance between us as slowly as I dared, letting Quil get ahead of me. Jacob's eyes never left my face, his jaw clenched.

Quil leapt onto the porch and started to go past Jacob when the alpha's arm suddenly shot out, grabbing his elbow in what I knew was a grip of iron.

"What's going on?" He growled darkly as he kept his gaze on me and his grip on Quil.

There was a brief moment of silence as I tried to think of how much to tell him.

The problem was solved as Quil spoke. "Seth and I are meeting for dinner tonight."

I saw Jacob's grip on Quil's arm tighten.

"You mean a date?" He snarled, his face livid as he continued to stare at me.

"No," whimpered Quil, looking like he was about to shit his pants, "he, er, lost a bet with me so he owes me dinner."

Jacob didn't look convinced and seemed to be struggling with himself, like he was having an internal conversation and he was losing. Then, he straightened up, his jaw tight and a vein pulsing on his temple.

He turned very slowly and glowered down at Quil, his face twisting into a threatening visage.

"You can go" he snarled, all the while leaning slowly forward, his eyes blazing with withheld anger and threats, "but if you touch my mate, even accidentally, I swear to god I'll kill you slowly and painfully."

Quil gulped and nodded, his face relieved but still scared.

Jacob squeezed his arm one more time before releasing him, causing the younger wolf to wince.

After Quil went inside, the slam of the screen door jarring me to my senses, Jacob turned his glare on me.

"The same goes for you Seth," He growled, his gaze hard and merciless. "Except I won't kill you, just ram you into my sheets until you're in worse shape than my dad."

A sudden image of myself, trapped in a wheelchair as Jacob, lust in his eyes, slowly lifting me out and onto his bed went through my mind.

Anger suddenly went through me, the song I had been thinking of just a few seconds ago running through my brain.

I wasn't going to be his plaything, something for him to control and intimidate.

I would sooner rot than be scared by his threats.

"Whatever," I growled, stalking past him in a way I hoped was confidant and insolent.

"Seth," I felt his hand touch my elbow and I knew he was going to grab it like he had done with Quil. Before he could get a grip on it I yanked my arm away.

"Back off!" I shouted before kicking the door open and storming through the kitchen and into the living room, ignoring the gazes of my fellow pack members as they filled the small room and flung myself between to Embry and Sam, who had Emily on his lap.

There was a moment of shocked silence, during which I noticed that Leah had returned. She sat on the loveseat, her legs on her pack mate Paul's lap, her arms crossed across her chest, her hair out of the pony tail that it had been in earlier. She looked a little confused and kept glancing at Paul, as if trying to believe that he wasn't going to jump her at any second. Quil sat on the floor across from them, on the fireplace, his expression stony.

"Where's Kim?" I growled, trying to break the uncomfortable silence.

"Jared took her home." Sam said, looking worried.

It was then that I noticed that Jacob hadn't come after me to place some sort of edict on the pack that discontinued any contact with me.

As if reading my mind, Jacob walked in, his hands curled into fists at his side, visibly shaking as he walked into the room, looking like he had just tussled with a bobcat.

Which wouldn't have surprised me.

Instead of doing something violent that involved my mouth and his dick like I had half-guessed, Jacob merely walked in front of the fireplace and began to announce the schedule for the evening.

I fully expected him to give me more patrols than I would possibly be able to get done in time to prevent me from going to dinner with Quil. But instead, he gave only one round with Sam.

He was probably going to order Sam to pick my mind for information, trying to make sure that I wasn't romantically involved with Quil.

I crossed my arm and kept up my stubborn silence as Jacob re-announced about Jared's imprinting on Kim for Leah's benefit.

"Wonderful," She muttered as Paul began to rub small circles on the leg nearest to his stomach, causing Quil's fists to tighten. "Just what we need, another brainless moron guilty of underage sex." Mumbled Leah

Paul chuckled, "Hey, don't call me a moron!" A small smile invaded Quils lips as he gazed at Paul, adoration in every inch of his face. It was obvious that he was insanely in love with the gray wolf and this only increased my curiosity. Why was Quil so enamored with Paul? What did he see in him?

I would find out tonight, hopefully, and these observations only increased the suspense.

Now that I thought of it, why didn't anyone else notice? Couldn't they see how Quil's eyes kept going back to Paul, how his gaze would always snap back to him every time the elder wolf made the slightest movement?

Then I realized that Quil really was alone, viewed only as the comic relief, the innocent big brother without anything but smiles and rainbows in his heart. We only gave attention to him when he did something funny or something that was worthy of admiration. Otherwise we ignored him, too absorbed in our own little worlds to notice that he was in pain.

For the first time in a long time I felt pity for someone other than myself.

I was jarred out of my thoughts by a loud cheer from the pack members, most likely from whatever announcement made by Jacob that I had ignored.

"What?" I asked confusedly, trying to gather my permanently scattered wits.

"Collin and Brady are about to phase," Embry said, a grin on his lips as he spoke, "Probably within the next few days."

Even Jacob had a small smile on his face as he listened to Paul cheer as he high-fived Leah, causing Quil to flinch. Wow, the kid was in deep if just a high-five between friends made him jealous.

Collin and Brady, huh? I only knew that they were a bunch of relatively nice kids who were best friends, never ones to cause trouble. Otherwise, I knew nothing about them.

"Finally," Paul cheered, a mischievous smirk on his face "We'll have someone who's never seen a piece of honest to goodness porn. We'll break them in with that episode where Sam went all 'March Hare' on you in that little clearing you called Wonderland."

Emily snorted, a smirk of her own in her perfect features. "You just wish it was you, Pauline, I can see you're just green with envy at how Sam actually knows how to get some."

Paul growled, looking annoyed while the rest of us choked on our laughter, Leah not even trying to hold it in as she rolled around

Sam joined in with the silent chuckles before nipping Emily on the neck in an affectionate manner. This action must have surprised her because she jumped, causing him to bite his wife on the shoulder a little harder than he meant to, making her yelp. She shot an acidic glare in his direction before grumbling something about no sex for a week. Sam whined at this, sucking her neck in a soothing manner, trying to appease her.

"Please?" he whimpered pitifully as he continued to suck.

Emily shifted uncomfortably, obviously trying to resist my brother's charms and we all knew she wouldn't last. Sam could be really persuading when he wanted to be and Emily was too kind hearted to make anyone suffer for a long period of time.

"Fine," she finally muttered, crossing her arms and trying not to smile as Sam gave off a cheer and began to kiss her ear enthusiastically, "Just don't let it happen again."

Sam didn't answer, just smiled wider and began to whisper things in her the ear he was kissing that made her turn bright red.

"Well," Jacob said, getting up off the fireplace and heading out the door. "I'll see you guys later."

There was a round of farewells before the pack slowly exited the house, leaving me to wait while Sam continued to kiss his wife.

Finally, after about ten minutes of watching them grope each other like a couple on prom night, with a mounting level of annoyance I cleared my throat.

Sam glared at me, looking irritated at my interruption while Emily looked embarrassed as she climbed off of his lap and went into the kitchen, cleaning up the mess from the cookies that I had never gotten a chance to sample.

"What?" He asked, expression annoyed.

"I'd like to get my round done sometime today, if you don't mind," I replied, rolling my eyes as I made my way out.

Sam followed after me, pausing to kiss Emily on the cheek and whisper something in her ear that made her laugh.

"What was that about?" I asked absentmindedly as I walked to the edge of the trees and pulled my clothes off.

Sam chuckled. "Don't ask or I'm going to play Jay-Z the entire time."

Needless to say, I didn't press him.

I walked into the living room, cleaned up and ready to go to dinner, dressed in a light blue polo and faded jeans, my newest pair of shoes on my feet.

Jacob was lounging on the couch, looking preoccupied.

To my credit, I did try to sneak past him but, unfortunately, he heard me.

"Going somewhere?" He said, not looking at me as I froze.

"Yes." I muttered.

His head turned around and he saw me. His eyes widened as he took in my appearance.

"Wow," he breathed, "You look amazing." I didn't miss the lust that flickered through his eyes.

Stupid jerk.

"Whatever," I muttered, making my way towards the door, keeping him in my line of view, feeling wary.

"Are those the clothes you're wearing to dinner?" he asked suddenly.

I nodded. He gave me a smile I didn't like and gestured me to come closer.

Phft, never.

His smile vanished and he bared his teeth. "Come here," He growled in the alpha voice.

Under normal circumstances I would have called him a cheater but it was feeling old so I decided on a new word for him whenever he used his leadership abilities.

Pervert.

I gritted my teeth and came forward, slowly, until I was in front of him.

"I'll let you go on one condition." He said looking up at me and then down at my body.

I looked at him, feeling nervous. "What?" I asked, feeling wary.

Instead of replying, his hands shot up and grabbed the front of my shirt, yanking me onto him as he devoured my mouth. I felt one of his hands in my hair, controlling my head to move against his lips' advances, pulling me closer as his other hand slid under my jeans and gripped my ass in his large hands, squeezing it possessively. I began to struggle as his tongue snaked into my mouth, ruthlessly raping my mouth's innocence -or what was left of it, the bulge in his jeans rapidly swelling into my stomach. He tugged on my lower lip with his teeth as his aroused scent attacked my nose.

Good god, not again.

He pulled away, his eyes wild and filled with lust.

Take off your shirt" He ordered, a smirk appearing on his face as the blanket of control settled over my limbs, forcing them to do his bidding. My hands went to the hem of my polo, starting to lift it over my head.

"Slowly," He growled, his eyes trained on the small amount of skin at my waist that was exposed to his ravenous gaze, "I want to savor this."

I say again: pervert.

My hands obediently began to slowly remove my shirt in a very suggestive manner, letting him see me only an inch at a time, always making him want more.

Good grief, I hated this. And him, and my life. Oh, what the heck, I hated everything.

After I removed my shirt I tossed it to the side before looking at Jacob expectantly, waiting for his next order. I didn't have to wait very long.

"Get on your stomach on the couch," he growled, "and keep that sexy little mouth of yours shut."

I pulled myself off of him and walked towards the couch, laying on my back before I turned my face to the back of the couch, not wanting to see him or what he was about to do.

I heard a shuffling noise that betrayed Jacob walking over to me. He climbed on top, straddling me as he used my butt as a cushion.

"I won't be mating with you, Seth," he growled into my ear as I heard the sound of his zipper being pulled down, his tone betraying the fact that he wished it were otherwise. "But I'm going to mark you so Quil knows to keep his hands off what's mine."

I gulped as I heard him begin to grunt as I strange slapping sound filled my ears as his body began to shake. Was he about to phase?

"What are you doing?" I asked, afraid of what the answer might be.

He groaned, his voice sounding shaky, "I'm going to cover you with my scent, baby. Fuck, oh god, Seth, I love your fucking ass."

What was going on? My confusion mounted to the boiling point. Then I smelt something that was an awful lot like...pre-cum?

Oh shit, was he _jerking off_?

SICK!

The noise continued, followed by moans and curses, my name mixing here and there as I felt small drops of his arousal fall onto my exposed back, the smell coming at me like a fog that was thicker than Paul's skull.

The shaking increased and with it Jacobs moans as he pleasured himself over me. I hated his freaking guts.

"Seth," he moaned, "I'm...really, really close...shit, you're so wet."

Wait, was he imagining that he was actually mating with me? Despite my disgust, I was kind of glad that he was just pretending, instead of actually doing it.

I felt his left hand twist into my hair and he yanked my head back, his other presumably occupied with his cock.

"Say my name Seth, say the name of your dominant," he groaned into my ear.

I gritted my teeth, refusing to submit to him. I would sooner… He yanked my hair painfully, causing me to yelp.

"Damn it, Seth," he snarled, the squelching noise of his hand rubbing his cock acting like background music, "say my name."

I screamed at him in my head, calling him all sorts of names, none of them appropriate. Instead, I snarled his title through my teeth, making it sound like a curse word. "Jacob."

I felt his body arch and streams of warm goo cover my back, making what was left in my stomach decide it wanted some sunlight. Jacob continued to pant, the noises from his hand on his cock fading as he milked his orgasm, all the while whispering a rehash of the words he had said as he had masturbated himself.

Then I felt his hand go across my back, gathering his cum into his palm like some leftover jelly he wanted to eat out of his hand.

Then he flipped me over, showing me his sweat soaked forehead, his shirt darkened at the armpits and around his collar. Thank God his dick was back in his jeans, that much I could be thankful for.

Jacob looked down at me, smirking before he rubbed the cum in his hand onto my chest, coating my torso with his sperm like some kind of sick lotion. His movements were slow and sensual, feeling every curve of my body as if memorizing it. He tried to play with my nipples but I sent him a glare that showed him I didn't want those particular areas addressed. He responded by taking one into his mouth, trying to coax a response out of me. When he did this I just went into a sort of trance, not feeling lest I might actually moan which I knew was what he wanted. After he realized that I wasn't going to let myself go he gave up.

Ha, take that you stupid dominant!

After coating me with his putrid fluids he kissed me, his movements gentle as he sucked on my lower lip. After the cum had dried he leaned down and sniffed, a smile on his lips as he kissed the line between my pecs, obviously enjoying himself.

"I smell good on you," he whispered as he pulled away and kissed me once more, this time more roughly.

Ugh, was it even possible for me to loath him with any more intensity?

"If I even catch a whiff of Quil on you," he growled into my mouth, his eyes narrowed as they pierced mine, his hands squeezing my arm. "I'll take your tight little ass where you stand, be that in the woods, on your way home or on the porch when you get back."

He pulled away and got up, leaving me sticky and extremely pissed off on the couch.

"See you when you get back, baby," he smirked as he made his way towards the bathroom. Probably to jerk off some more, to prevent me from showering or both.

"Don't call me that," I snarled in a low voice when I was sure he was out of earshot.

_I loathe him with everything I have_, I thought to myself as I took my shirt and raced out the door, looking for a spring where I could scrub myself raw and maybe get some of the smell off of me.

With my luck, all the water sources in La Push were probably dried up.

I walked up to the front of the restaurant, only to see Quil standing alone in the doorway. Thank God I had found a stream to wash myself off with. I was late, but at least I didn't smell like Jacob's jizz. As I neared my pack brother, I heard soft sobs that were being emitted from his chest as the smell of tears came at me.

As I neared him he looked up, his tear-stained face a small testament to the pain he was obviously feeling.

"Seth," he sobbed, his voice breaking, "Can...can we eat somewhere else?"

"Why?" I asked, "Don't you love seafood?" Maybe love was too weak an adjective, 'obsess with' might work better. The kid adored eating shrimp and french-fries at Black Beards, it was his favorite restaurant in all of La Push. It was also the only restaurant that sold beer but Quil liked to think this didn't affect his preference to any other restaurant.

"Not tonight," He croaked before leaving the doorway, allowing me to see into the restaurant.

At first all I could see was cigarette smoke and an endless sea of heads. The music blared through some cheap speakers, mostly obliterating the football game that was on the small TV mounted on the wall.

Then I saw them, sitting in a corner booth in full view of the public. Their arms were so tightly wrapped around each other it was hard to tell whose was whose as they kissed like their lives depended on it.

Paul and...was that...?

I was going to kill that stupid son of a bitch.


	9. Chapter 9 The Explanation

**Disclaimer: I do not own Twilight or any of the characters created by Stephenie Meyer.**

Chapter 9 The Explanation

Quil and I walked in a tense silence towards Bella Notte, the only other decent restaurant in La Push outside of Black Beards. I was still mad about seeing my sister making out with her supposed best friend and Quil was apparently still heartbroken.

The question was, why? Why was I so upset about seeing Leah kissing Paul like they had been doing it forever?

Easy, I didn't want Paul as a brother-in-law. And the way they had been glued to each other suggested that they were heading down that road. Brilliant choice of a boyfriend, Leah. Choose the one guy who not only has anger management problems, is the biggest jerk on the planet, and the IQ of a hamster, but also the one who has a werewolf pining after him.

I still had absolutely no idea why Quil was acting like this. Paul wasn't that great of a guy so why should Quil be so ridiculously in love with the bastard? It was an enigma, a mystery that I was going to solve, even if the answer was as stereotypical as Quil having imprinted on him.

Damn you, whoever invented curiosity.

Needless to say, we were both in a sort of uneasy mood. We would have to be careful, one false step could have one or both of us phasing, thereby bringing the National Guard by for tea, cakes, and a bunch of mutant werewolves they would undoubtedly want to study and turn into secret weapons.

Bella Notte, an Italian restaurant that was named after some cafe in a Disney movie, was the place most couples went out to eat together for some time away from their bratty kids or just to be alone together. And as we entered the sandy colored building it was easy to see why. The place was a scene from a romantic movie just waiting to happen. A group of small tables filled the middle, each with a candle, a basket of bread sticks and a tiny bottle of olive oil in the middle of the plain white tablecloths that covered the wooden surfaces. Lights hung from each one, suspended above the tables like miniature suns, casting a very romantic atmosphere. Along the walls were several booths, set much the same as the round ones albeit the bread sticks were much more numerous and the lighting was much less subtle, giving those tables a homier look.

If not for the fact that I was in the mood for Italian anyway and Black Beards was the only other restaurant that wasn't crappy, greasy, or a breakfast place, I would have refused to go in. Why couldn't Paul and Leah have made out somewhere else? Like in the bathroom?

Bella Notte was mostly empty due to the late hour but a few people sat at the tables or booths, laughing or talking, the clink of glass and metal mixing in with the rush of conversation.

A Quilete girl walked up to us, looking like she hadn't slept in days. She was dressed in a blue polo much like my own with the words 'Mabel' written across them in bright orange cursive letters. "Can I help you two?"

_Yes,_ I thought, _I have a maniac werewolf that wants to have forced sex with me and my partner here, also a werewolf, is in lust over a jerk that I just saw making out with my werewolf sister. What would you suggest?_

Quil remained silent; looking down at his feet with his shoulders slumped. I looked at him, feeling the utmost pity and confusion for him. The tension of not knowing what was going on with him was, to be honest, maddening.

After a few moments of polite waiting, Mabel turned to me. "Is your boyfriend shy or something?" She asked, looking at me over with obvious contempt.

She thought Quil...was my _boyfriend_? I had never been in more danger of phasing than at that moment.

"He isn't my boyfriend," I spat, more harshly than I intended. Who was she to judge me? Just who did she think she was?

I felt the tremors start, causing me to shake violently as rage boiled deep inside my chest like an animal that wanted to be released. I had never felt this mad before and is scared me, like there was something inside me, a monster of unimaginable proportions, and it wanted out.

_Think calm thoughts, calm, calm,_ I repeated to myself.

Leah, laughing as I showed her a picture I found that I had drawn when I was nine. Her teaching me how to swim, barking orders at me like a drill sergeant, but squealing with glee when I finally managed to stay afloat longer than ten seconds.

Sam, attempting to play a video game with me, whooping when he finally managed to kill me by accident. Emily, her eyes sparkling as she welcomed me home from school with a big smile and a plate of brownies.

The last picture we had of Mom and Dad, standing in on snowy mountain side, both their brown cheeks rosy from the cold and the excitement they were obviously feeling. The car crashed the day after they sent it, killing them both instantly. They wouldn't want me to lose control; they would want me to keep it together for the pack and my family's sake.

The tremors slowed and finally ceased, though I think I might have given off several growls in the process, causing several guests to turn and look at us.

"Oh," Mabel stuttered, apparently surprised at such a large amount of ferocity coming out of such a tiny person. "I just, uh, saw the way you were looking at him just now and thought-er...um, do you want a booth or a table?" She finally managed to get out, looking nervous, like I would blow up at any second.

_A table so we can stare at each other and get lost in our own perfect little world like in a stupid romance novel! Insert sarcastic happy dance here!_ Ugh, I needed to take a nap, I was an emotional wreck.

"A booth," I finally said, struggling to get a grip on myself.

Phft, what did she think we wanted? Was she even capable of thinking? I doubted it; she looked like she only thought about make-up. Just like**…** Kim.

Both of them, Kim and the girl in front of me, were just... stereotypes, never different from the rest of the population, never remarkable, never doing anything other than think of themselves.

Though I had to admit Kim had surprised me by standing up to Jacob and she was handling the whole werewolf thing pretty well, all things considered. Hadn't even screamed when Jared had shown her his wolf form, just stuttered a little and then took the whole thing in stride, like some goddamn pioneer, forging into unknown territory with a sappy grin on her face.

She talked to him and they had agreed that she should come to our next bonfire and she could hear the stories that pertained to our freak existences. Jared had asked me to stay away from her and I suspected he was already starting to develop a possessive/protective side for Kim.

Well, sucks to be her or me for that matter. Wait, didn't I already say that? Wow, now _I _was starting to lose what little originality I had left.

We walked behind Mabel and she led us to a corner booth, letting us sit down before asking what we wanted to drink. After writing down our requests, root beer for me and coke for Quil, she left us to look at our menus.

I read through the various dishes, looking at the prices. Damn, how could people here afford this kind of stuff?

"You were just kidding about me paying for this, right?" I asked, looking at Quil as he looked down at his menu with little or no interest.

He looked up at me and gave me a small smile that had at best only a third of its former mischievous nature. "Nope."

I cursed under my breath. This would set me back big time, financially. But hey, curiosity made the cat go bankrupt, or something like that.

I finally settled on a single piece of lasagna, keeping in mind that Quil would order a lot, being a werewolf, and that I could always raid the fridge when I got home.

I waited for Quil to make his selection(s), munching on a bread stick or five to keep the hunger at bay. The place smelled good, a fact I hadn't noticed earlier. Like tomatoes and Italian seasoning with fresh bread and grated cheese mixing in. God, I was hungry, I felt like I could clean out their kitchen in no time flat.

I looked down again and noticed that there was a deal for all-you-can-eat-spaghetti. And it was on sale.

To hell with that stupid piece of lasagna, I was going to get me some spaghetti!

Then, as if on cue, Quil looked up and said quietly, "I'm going to get the all you can eat deal, if that's okay."

I grinned at him and nodded, just in time for another waitress to come up. This one was dressed like the previous waitress though this one was blond, almost unnaturally so, with a weird mole next to her dark red lips. Man, I was going to make sure I ordered some Parmesan cheese with my spaghetti. Her white skin made her look like she had rolled in the stuff. Shit, now I was even hungrier.

"Can I take your order?" she grumbled, looking like taking our order was the last thing she wanted to do.

"Two all-you-can-eats please." I said, noticing that her name, Ronnie, was also sewn on front of her shirt.

She wrote our requests down and took our menus, leaving just as the first girl came up with our drinks. She told us which drinks were which and gave me a fearful glance and Quil a pitying look before leaving without a word.

We sat in silence while we waited, me watching Quil as he picked miserably at the tablecloth.

"So," I finally said, feeling awkward but the uncomfortable silence and my own curiosity pushing me forward. "What's up?"

Quil took a sip of his coke before answering. "Love."

I stared at him.

"Okay," I said slowly, completely put off by his strange choice of word. "Why are you in love with Paul? Because, to be honest, he's not that great of a guy to be wasting your time on."

Quil gave off a weak laugh, "That's what he wants everyone to think. He thinks you all will let him go if you don't like him that much."

I blinked in surprise. "Why would he want that?" I finally asked.

Quil sighed, looking out the window with a pained look in his eyes. "Because of Laura."

That's when I remembered Paul's dead imprint. "Oh" I whispered.

There was a moment of silence before Quil spoke again; still looking out the window like it was a passage into his memories.

"About a month after I phased Paul came up to me and asked me if I would hang out with him, that he just needed someone to talk to. I went to his house and he told me about Laura while he worked on his car, about how she was killed not long after he imprinted. He told me that as soon as his Grandpa died he would have nothing left to live for. He said that he was planning on committing suicide. I told him that he was a moron for thinking about doing that. I called him an ass and told him that it would devastate the pack if he killed himself, that it would be like cutting off all of our right arms."

Quil's face softened slightly as I listened in rapt attention.

"A few days later," he continued, "he asked me to come over again and told me that I was right, he wouldn't do away with his life. He said that he was glad that I had talked him out of it and asked if I could come over every once in a while. He said he liked talking to me because I was like Leah in the respect that I wasn't afraid of him and was willing to be honest in my opinions."

Quil finally looked at me, his black eyes brimming with tears.

"I kept my word and came over twice a week and we would just talk, not about anything important, just blabbing at each other. Those were the best weeks of my life. He taught me how to spit and how to fix cars and a whole bunch of things other people wouldn't dream of teaching me. He told me his life story and actually listened to mine. He would ask me questions and answered everything I wanted to know, with no sugar-coating."

He gave me a bleary smile as he blinked, sending his tears cascading down his cheeks.

"I can't even tell you how much I love him Seth," he sobbed, shocking me with the rawness of the love he was so obviously emitting for Paul. "He treats me like I deserve to be treated, if I'm a jerk he says so, if I'm being too nice he tells me. He noticed me when no one else would and didn't treat me like a boy in a man's body, like I was a big teddy bear that needed to be cuddled. He makes me laugh when I'm miserable and he isn't afraid to act stupid if that's what it takes to make me feel better. And all of that took a toll and the next thing I knew..." He broke off, bawling into his hands.

I gulped looking around at the people who had decided that they would like to observe us rather than their own conversations.

Quil's sobs became louder to the point of a siren's volume.

I got up and sat down next to him, feeling a little uncomfortable when he turned himself and cried into my shoulder just like I had done with Leah earlier that day. He slowly wound down, reduced to a few mere sobs as he finished the cry he had so obviously been holding in for so long. I couldn't even imagine how he must have felt keeping all that locked away inside of him. It was even more of a wonder that we had never noticed.

I ran my hand in soothing circles on his back as I waited for him to finish.

"I started to notice things, like the way he smelled and how he looked without a shirt. Then it was how his laugh sounded and I started to wonder what his hair would feel like if I ran my fingers through it. The feelings just kept growing and growing and then Paul came to my house one night. He was drunk and asked to see me. I came out onto the porch and he asked me if I would do something for him."

He paused for a second and drew in a shuddering breath before he went on, his body shaking with withheld sobs.

"Before I even had a chance to reply he kissed me. Then ran inside and threw up in the toilet. He didn't even remember it the next day. That night I had my first sex dream and woke up crying because I was so confused by how bad I wanted it. Then I finally realized that...I loved him, that it didn't matter if he was a guy, I wanted him to be my first and last. But eventually he started to go out again with some random girls and I didn't say anything, even though it hurt to see him hugging or kissing them. Then I found out about Aaron and it felt like someone had stabbed me in the chest but I managed to hide it."

Quil sounded exhausted and I continued to massage his back, knowing that it always made me feel better if someone gave me a few rubs on my shoulder blades.

"Anyway, Paul hates gay people now and if he knew that I loved him he would hate me." Quil whispered, "And I couldn't bear that."

Wow, Quil really was in deep. Paul opened himself up to Quil and the poor boy was insanely in love with the older wolf. I wondered how many people got to see that side of Paul.

After another awkward pat on the back I made my way back to my original seat across from Quil, keeping my mouth shut.

"That's also why I always make fun of you." Quil said, his voice shaking slightly, "I was jealous."

I gaped at him.

"You were jealous of me?" I said disbelievingly, "Why? You want to be a submissive, to be controlled by someone else for the rest of your life?"

Quil's head shot up, his puffy red eyes glaring at me. Wow, talk about bipolar. One second he's crying like a girl, the next he looks like he wants to kill me.

"If that's what it takes to be with someone who loves me." He snarled, looking defiant.

I growled, my hands clenching underneath the table. "But what if you don't love them back, huh?" I snapped, "What if you hated them with every fiber of your soul, would you want to continue submitting to them as long as they loved you?"

Quil's glare grew in intensity, his shoulders shaking slightly." I know that, given enough time, I could grow to love them. It's impossible to fight love with hate, Seth, Emily would know."

That stopped me. "What do you mean?" I asked, a sense of foreboding going through me.

"I mean, that if a person loves you, you won't be able to hate-" he started before I cut him off.

"No, what did you mean about Emily? She's never hated Sam," I said, feeling the sense of doom grow in intensity.

Quil now really looked mad. "You really like fooling yourself, don't you?" he scoffed quietly, the shaking increasing, "You think that Sam has always been wonderful to Emily. Well, he hasn't. You've deluded yourself into thinking that all Jacob thinks about is sex and that you're just another thing for him to claim. You don't see that he wants you to love him, that he loves you more than anything and he wishes that the wolf-" Wow, I really liked to cut him off, seeing how this was the fourth time for me to do it.

"Why does everyone keep blaming it on the wolf? Why can't they just admit that Jacob is an over-hormonal, controlling, possessive-" _Quil_ cut _me_ off, that was a surprise.

"Dominant, that's what Jacob is," he growled, "he's following his instincts, doing what he was meant to do, to protect you, to love you, to cla-"

That was it. I slammed my fist on the table causing everyone in the restaurant but Quil to either jump or flinch. "I swear if you say that he was meant to claim me," I shouted at him, the fury that I had tucked away coming back in full force, "I swear to God I'll rip off your balls and shove them up your ass!"

Quil was silent, letting me get control of myself. I finally did, though I was still quivering, and he leaned forward, his eyes piercing mine. "Why exactly do you hate Jacob, Seth?"

I shot him a glare before speaking.

"I hate that he tries to control me," I muttered, " I hate that he seems to think that I'll just fling myself into his arms and beg him to fuck me. I hate that he doesn't think I'm capable of taking care of myself. I hate how he thinks that I'm his and his alone. I hate that he wants to deprive me of my freedom, I hate being forced into anything, let alone sex."

Quil said nothing, merely leaned back in his chair and looked at me for a long moment.

"I see your point," he finally said. "That would suck." Then he shrugged, "But hey, I'm just a submissive kind of guy, whereas you're...you."

I laughed, couldn't argue there.

Ronnie, came back with our two orders, ignoring Quil's still tear stained face and my awkward look. She probably thought that we had just broken up or something. Moron. She set our plates in front of us and gave a lackluster apology for the delay before leaving.

Quil gave me a small smile that I heartily returned before beginning to eat.

We ate in silence, both understanding that there was nothing left to be said. But it was a comfortable silence, the kind between good companions. In those next few moments Quil and I silently agreed to be friends. Pouring you heart out to each other usually seems to do that.

Fourteen plates a piece later we left the building, knowing that the all you can eat deal would be gone by tomorrow.

As we walked I glanced over at Quil, noticing for the first time that he was the closest to my height in the pack, maybe a few inches difference. I also noticed that his shoulders were a lot less broad than the others, his chest less prominent.

"Quil," I said slowly as we walked up the dirt road towards my house, "Have you thought that maybe you imprinted on Paul?"

Quil chuckled sadly. "I wish, it would make this so much easier. But it was gradual; I fell in love with him naturally, not with a bang and bunch of explosions."

We were silent for a few moments. Then I saw Paul waiting in the middle of the road, his arms crossed and his feet spread, looking annoyed.

We looked at each other, Quil with panic and me with annoyance.

As we walked up to him I saw Quil's face change, instead of the scared boy who was deeply in love with Paul, I saw the eternally cheerful, always joking werewolf that I had thought was Quil.

"Sup, Paul?" He asked, a grin on his face. Wow, he was good at this.

"Jake sent me to get you two, said you were staying out too late." He muttered, looking angry. "I had to leave a date for this so I hope you guys have a good excuse."

That's when I remembered that Paul had been with my sister.

"Is that why you were at the Black Beard restaurant?" I said, keeping my voice sweet and innocent in a sarcastic way, "waiting for us?"

Paul glared at me, completely ignoring Quil who was whistling through his teeth as he looked at his surroundings, apparently not interested in our conversation. Only I saw that his pose became rigid, like he was trying to keep himself from jumping on the older wolf.

"It's none of your business who your sister wants to go out with, submissive." He sneered the last word, not even noticing Quil wince at his obvious disdain for anyone who submitted.

"I'm not the only submissive here, Paul," I said coolly, "I seem to recall you screaming Aaron's name, rather than the other way around."

Paul bared his teeth before he took a step forward. "Ever mention that bastard to me again, Clearwater, and I'll make sure that Jacob has his way with you before you can even blink."

"And just how would you do that?" I scoffed, crossing my arms defiantly.

"I can be creative when I want to," he said in reply, smirking at me, "I'll just make Jacob think you're cheating on him and he'll be on you like a dog in mating season."

"Charming," I said acidly, taking a step forward as well, my arms still crossed, "You just compared your leader to a dog, I'm sure he'll be thrilled to hear that."

Paul opened his mouth when a voice suddenly shouted out of the darkness. "Seth, get your ass up here or there'll be hell to pay!"

"Get a grip, Sam!" I shouted back, "I'll be there in a second!"

"NOW!"

I rolled my eyes, uncrossing my arms and moving past him. "Guess we'll have to finish this later, Paul," I growled as I walked around him.

"See you later, Quil." I called over my shoulder.

Mentioning Quil apparently brought Paul's attention back to the chocolate brown wolf.

"Oh, hey Quil." It didn't escape my notice that his voice was softer, much more affectionate. I stopped and listened, knowing that they probably wouldn't notice me.

"Hey, Paul," was his falsely cheerful reply.

"Can you come by on Thursday? It's been a while since you came over and I was wondering if you'd like to help me repair an old Mustang I got."

There was a moment's silence.

"Thanks Paul," Quil finally said, his voice heavily controlled, "but I'm going to be busy on Thursday so I can't."

There was a chuckle from Paul and I heard his voice drop several notes, making his voice seductive. "But it's got a couple of ripped seats and I need your help sewing them up, plus you've got smaller hands and can reach things I can't. I need you Quil, I need your mom's sewing kit and your hands. Don't deny me, please."

His voice was teasing and Quil finally laughed, a real laugh.

"Oh fine," he chuckled, "I'll bring it in at three."

Paul crowed in victory and I made my escape, guessing that they wouldn't like to know that I had listened in on their conversation.

I raced up the driveway and stopped, realizing that I must reek of Quil. Shit. Then, as if he had been called forth by this realization, Jacob stepped out of the shadows.

"Have a nice time?" he asked coldly, his eyes burning into mine.

I took a deep breath, ready to answer when he pounced, bring me to the ground with him on top of me.

"Good," he snarled in my face, "because if you smell like anyone besides me then that was the last meal you've eaten as a virgin."

I gulped before beginning to struggle, panic flooding me as he lowered his head. He pressed his nose against my chest before inhaling deeply. He drew back with a snap of his head.

We looked at each other for a long moment, Jacob calculating, me shaking. God, what did I do to deserve this?

"Garlic," he muttered.

"What?" I managed to get out.

"You smell like garlic." Jacob stood up and looked down at me. "Come inside, I want to talk to you after you take a shower."

Talk to me? Yeah right, more like eat my face off with one of his kisses.

I followed him in, running past him and into the bathroom before he could change his mind. Once in the shower I threw my clothes off and turned the water on high. I spent as long as I dared in underneath the pouring water, going over the events of the night. After about twenty minutes I decided that staying in the bathroom any longer would be folly and removed myself from the warm safety of the bathtub. I began drying myself off, wincing as I remembered what had happened just that morning. I get threatened by a vampire, learn that I can have kids, and almost get raped in the school hallway. Some day, huh?

I left the bathroom, fully expecting Jacob to be waiting for me. He wasn't, though I could hear him talking to Sam downstairs. I made my way into my room and pulled on jeans and a t-shirt, both of them a different shade a gray.

I walked down the stairs, noting that the light in Leah's room was on and I could hear music coming faintly from underneath the door.

Upon reaching the bottom I realized that Emily and Sam were alone, Jacob nowhere in sight.

"Where's-" I started when I felt a pair of arms encircle me from behind.

"Right here, baby," he breathed in my ear.

I gulped before speaking; making sure that my butt didn't touch his crotch. "What did you want to talk to me about?" I asked, trying to pry his arms away and finding no success.

He was silent for a moment. Then one of his hands slid across my chest and down to my hip. Once there, he gripped it in a possessive squeeze.

"Tomorrow," he said slowly, his mouth brushing against the back of my ear, "while the pack is at school you're going to spend the day at my house."

I froze. Being anywhere near Jacob was bad enough but to be near Jacob and his _bed_ with only an old guy in a wheelchair to protect me was just...terrifying.

"Why?" I growled, reaching down and trying to push his hand away from my hip. Of course, I couldn't.

"Sam and I thought you should get to know me better, you know, spend some time alone with me."

Before I could close my stupid, independent mouth I snapped, "The last time we were alone together I almost got raped. And all the times before that, if I recall."

Instead of answering, the hand that I had been trying to remove from my hip went behind and gripped my ass through the jeans, making me gasp as the pain went through me.

"Billy will be there," he murmured into my ear as he gripped my ass harder.

"Wow," I said sarcastically, "I'll be protected by someone who can't even walk, let alone save me if you lose control. That's so comforting."

Jacob gave off a light laugh, his breath rushing across my ear.

"Let me put it this way, baby," he chuckled in my ear, "what choice do you have?"

I didn't answer. He was right, I _didn't _have any choice.

Then, moving so fast I could barely comprehend what was happening, Jacob spun me around and grabbed my thighs, lifting me up and wrapping my legs around his waist as my hands instinctively went around his neck to keep myself from falling. As soon as this happened, Jacob attacked my mouth, his movements erotic and sensual.

Next thing I knew I was being set on a hard surface, his tongue still invading my mouth as I was pressed against a wall. I felt him grind himself into me, letting me feel his erection as he gripped the underside of my right leg, keeping it elevated so he could press himself onto me with less obstruction. I managed to realize that we were on the table in the kitchen by the creaking noise that it made as Jacob put a great amount of pressure on my crotch with his clothed dick.

"Jacob!" Sam shouted warningly. That's all he would do? Yell at him? Give him a scolding?

Get him the fuck off of me!

The alpha ignored his beta but his movements began to slow and I could feel the bulge in his jeans shrinking. He broke away; a string of saliva hanging between us that was quickly broken as I scrambled away from him. He panted as he watched me move away from him, his gaze hungry and lustful as he stood facing me.

"I'll see you tomorrow, baby," he said, his voice low and husky. What was his problem? Once again, I was repeating myself. He must be rubbing off on me. Crap.

With that, he left, making sure that he brushed against me as he sidled past. I sent him my most biting glare but it only made him chuckle and he tousled my hair, causing me to flinch as he left.

I turned my scorching gaze on Emily and Sam as they stood a few feet away from me, looking slightly ashamed.

"Thanks for the help, you're sending me to my doom," I spat as I crossed my arms and leaned against the counter.

"Seth," Sam started but Emily cut him a look that told him to keep his mouth shut. He did what she said, as usual and I was immensely relieved. I didn't want to hear his crappy apologies or stupid explanations.

I glanced at them, standing side by side, perfect for each other in every way. How could they ever hate each other?

"Sam," I asked, knowing that I should be feeling uncomfortable about what I was about to say but, to be honest, I wasn't, "Quil mentioned something about Emily...hating you at one point. Could you tell me what he meant by that?"

The color drained from Sam's face and Emily gasped.

"What did he tell you?" They both asked in unison.

"Nothing," I snapped, still too pissed at them to care if I sounded harsh, "he told me to ask you guys if I wanted to know."

Sam and Emily looked at each other for a long moment, communicating without speaking like they often did. A sort of conversation of the heart.

Finally, Emily sighed. "It's time he knew, Sam; he deserves to know, what with his birthday coming up."

Sam exhaled through his nose before turning back to me.

"Seth," he said, gesturing for Emily to come closer. She walked up and sat on his lap, his arms wrapping around her waist in a loving embrace like she was an anchor and he was a ship that needed her to keep him from flying to pieces, "you know how I said that the week I disappeared was when I had first phased?"

I nodded, remembering the incident well. Me and Leah had been frantic while Mom and Dad kept calm, telling us that Sam was a big boy and would be fine. He had come back at the end of the week with about thirty pounds of extra muscle, four inches in height, and a bleeding Emily in his arms. He had said that he was walking home and found her in the road with a bear leaving the scene. But I now knew that he had accidentally phased. If not for Emily's years of living with four older brothers, her instincts sharpened from avoiding all the tough love that came with them, she would have gotten some scars on her face instead of just on her back.

"Well, they weren't put there by accident."

I looked at him, confused. "What do you mean?"

Sam took a deep breath and tightened his hold on Emily.

"Seth, the day I imprinted on Emily," he said, pain and regret on his face, "I raped her."

Oh.

My.

God.

And.

Er.

Shit.


	10. Chapter 10 The Revelation

**Disclaimer: I do not own Twilight or any of the characters created by Stephenie Meyer.**

**Chapter 10 The Revelation**

I sat in stunned silence for about ten seconds before Sam's words finally sank in. Emily had been raped by Sam...and then she married him? I had never been so confused in my life, apart from when I was introduced to the wonderful world of math.

As if sensing my confusion, Emily got off of Sam's lap and gave him a determined look. "Show him," she said, a hint of stubbornness in her voice, as if she knew he would refuse.

"Emily," Sam started but she held up her hand, palm facing towards him, silently showing that she wasn't going to be moved on this.

Sam sighed and beckoned for me to walk outside with him. I did so, casting Emily a perplexed glance as I walked out the door behind his bulky form. She gave me an encouraging smile that I tried to return, but failed as I sensed that she would rather I not see what I was about to, but knew that it was obligatory, whatever that meant.

I walked out to the woods a few paces behind Sam, practically jogging to keep up with his long strides. We entered into the forest, the moon shining down through the treetops and creating strange patterns on the floor. Sam stopped and turned to me, apprehension on his face.

"Seth," he said, looking nervous, "I'm going to show you what happened the day I phased. I want you to see what it was like for me...what it's like for Jacob."

I didn't say anything, just waited with baited breath as we both shed our clothes and phased, Sam's memories flooding through me as soon as our minds connected.

***Memory (Sam's POV)***

I sat on the couch, watching Seth play video games. I didn't feel the need to join him since I could never understand what he saw in the electronic thingamajigs.

Leah and her best friend Paul where up in her room arguing about some CD that Paul had bought recently.

I could hear mom and dad talking quietly to each other in the kitchen and focused all the more on Seth's game because I didn't want to overhear it.

I knew what they were talking about. They were discussing all the fights I'd been getting into at school and how my grades had dipped in the last month.

What can I say? February had been a shitty month for me. I had been feeling really restless lately and I took it out on some of the guys who made fun of my brother. I had been overreacting in most cases but hey, I was protective by nature. I didn't like seeing people I cared about being mocked just because they were a little shorter than most.

The grades were mostly due to the fact that I had been sleeping and eating a lot lately, therefore limiting the time meant for studying.

Like I said, February was one piece of crap month.

I sighed and ran my fingers though my short black hair, the feeling of restlessness going through me in a fresh wave. I couldn't understand it, I never felt like this before, all stressed out and freaked without even knowing why I was feeling like this.

I watched Seth's car beat the crap out of his opponent, not really seeing the action onscreen.

There was a thump from Leah's room and I hear her door slam as the pair came down the stairs into the living room.

I turned my head and looked at them as they sauntered in, both still bickering away as each argued over the pros and cons of his CD. As I watched, Paul reached over and pulled a strand of hair out of Leah's mouth and tucked it behind her ear.

I felt a surge of anger boil inside me. I didn't like the way he had done that, it was just a little too affectionate in my opinion.

I took a deep breath, trying to calm down as the pair got the Oreo jar out of the cabinet and walked over to join us in front of the TV, Leah grabbing a few glasses and a jug of milk along the way.

Paul plopped himself down next to me and promptly began to eat a few cookies. God, didn't the kid have his own home? I took another deep breath, trying to keep it together before I blew up at the kid for eating some Oreos.

Leah poured us all a glass of milk and handed them to us. Seth gave her a brief smile and a nod of appreciation before turning back to his game.

I couldn't help but smile at this brief interlude. When I saw them together I felt a lot better because I knew that they would always be there for me and that I would kill anyone who hurt them.

Then, as if in synch with my thoughts, Paul reached over and gave Seth a light tap on the head.

"Come on, pipsqueak," he said irritably, "let one of us have a turn."

Anger boiled through me, hatred, malice, and a whole bunch of other emotions I couldn't even name burning inside of me like a fire.

I saw only red, rage completely covering all thought, all reason. All I knew was that Paul had insulted my little brother and he deserved to pay for it.

Next thing I knew, I had Paul up against the wall, my hands gripping the front of his shirt as I pinned him several feet from the ground.

"What did you call him?" I roared at him, shaking his vile, contemptible body as hard as I could, "don't you ever touch my brother you fucking bastard!"

"Sam!" Leah shouted, panic in her voice as she yanked on my arm, trying to get me to let go of Paul. I looked down at her, feeling my rage ebb away as I saw my little sister pulling at me, fear in her black eyes.

The anger faded completely as I saw Seth, his game forgotten, staring at me like I was a complete stranger.

It hurt to see my brother and sister look at me like this and I turned back to Paul, still in my grip. The kid looked scared, like he thought I was going to rip his throat out.

I set him down as gently as I could, feeling regret rush through me as I saw mom and dad looking at me from the kitchen door, disappointment in their eyes.

God, I hated my life.

"Sorry," I muttered to Paul who was still pressing himself against the wall in terror.

"I'm going for a walk," I announced, feeling ashamed of myself for what I had done but the confusion overrode my shame. I hadn't been able to control it. One second I was fine, the next I'm acting like the incredible hulk.

I walked out the door feeling pissed off at the world. Where was I going to go to relieve that? I had no idea.

I ran as fast as I could into the woods, finally letting myself go. It was easy, the woods always brought out the bad side of me, the black part.

I kept running and running, just letting my anger fuel my strides. Was it just me or did I seem to be going faster? I ignored this and kept going, not letting any thought go through my mind.

I had been running about twenty minutes when I felt a dull pain all over my body and realized I was running on all fours. Then I saw two black paws exactly where my feet should have been.

What the fuck?

Several days passed after the whole incident where I discovered I could turn into a wolf and I still hadn't gone home. I didn't want to face my family and tell them that I was freak of nature.

I was walking in human form along the edge of a town that I hadn't bothered to find out the name of.

I was dressed in some clothes that I had stolen, my last outfit still in shreds from when I had transformed for the first time. Control was still an issue and I had nearly killed several people but, for now, my secret was safe. I had called mom and dad on the second day to let them know that I was all right, just needed some time alone. I had done so by using some change I had collected from a fountain that should have frozen my hand off.

Nice thing about being a freak? You're super hot.

Both literally and figuratively, fortunately. I didn't know what was the exact number, but felt hotter than the highest fever I ever had and I gotten some meat. I mean, seriously, I had put on like twenty pounds of muscle and several inches in height. I hadn't been too bad off in either department but it was a much needed ego boost to see girls gape at me in the few towns I had strayed into.

I was walking down a street when I suddenly recognized one of the houses. Mr. and Mrs. Young had been friends with mom and dad for years and I had a crush on their daughter, Emily.

Okay, I never got over that crush but hey, she was a hard girl to get over.

I'd kind of like to see her again and to talk to her for a bit. And show off my new body, just a little. Maybe I had subconsciously wanted to talk to her and come here without realizing it.

I walked up to the door and rang the doorbell, nervous for a reason I couldn't explain.

The door opened and Mrs. Young's plump face peeked around at me. She had a wrinkled face that was all smiles and an oriental ancestry that was quite different than that of her husband, who was a Native American.

"Samuel," she said happily, swinging the door wide open as the smell of muffins attacked me, "what a pleasure to see you."

She took stock of my new build and her eyebrows rose on her head, "you seem to have sprung up overnight," she said.

She had absolutely no idea that that was exactly the case.

"Hello, Mrs. Young," I said politely, not missing she had opened the door a little wider, as if by doing so she was enticing me in, "I was in the neighborhood and thought I'd stop by for a second"

A sly smile crept onto her face and she ushered me in, asking me to sit down. I did so, noting that the place was a lot cleaner than I remembered.

"Goodness," she said as I pulled my hood down, "won't you freeze with so little on?"

Without waiting for an answer she clucked her tongue against the roof of her mouth a few times before saying: "You Clearwaters, always ignoring the cold."

I gave her a weak smile, knowing that she was thinking of my dad and his habit of forgetting his coat on days like this. Mrs. Young excused herself, with my freaky super hearing I heard her hurry into the kitchen where the sounds of pots and other utensils were being emitted.

"Emily," Mrs. Young whispered, "Sam Clearwater is here!"

I heard a brief pause before a light, slightly musical voice answered, "so?"

Mrs. Young sighed in frustration.

"The ignorance of youth," she grumbled as a telephone began to ring.

I heard her answer it as the sound of baking continued and the smells of other confections wafted in. Whatever Emily was making had sure set my stomach into a frenzy.

I heard Mrs. Young listen to the person on the other end of the line and groan.

"Can't you do it?" she asked, "I've got company."

She listened for a bit then sighed in defeat.

"Very well," she said before hanging up.

"Emily," she said, "I need to go pick up Robert, can you keep Sam company while I go pick him up?"

I heard Emily snort.

"Convenient," was all she said.

I couldn't help but chuckle. Yes, it was convenient that we would be alone in the house together. I knew that Mrs. Young wanted me and Emily to get together; she said that we were destined for each other.

I saw Mrs. Young give me a hasty apology that I knew she didn't mean before she left, shutting the door behind her.

I sat for a few moments, waiting for Emily to come out of the kitchen. While I sat twiddling my thumbs, wondering what I was going to say to her, I looked around the room, glancing at the pieces of furniture that were all brutally clean. One thing was for sure, someone in the Young family was a good housekeeper.

As if on cue I heard the final clack as Emily shut the last of the cabinet doors and walked into the living room.

The first thing I noticed was that she had changed since I had seen her last. She had more of an hourglass shape and she was wearing her hair differently, more to the side than parted down then middle. She was dressed in skin tight jeans that showed her legs to their best advantage. She was wearing a short sleeved dress shirt that was a light pink with puffy sleeves.

Then I saw her eyes and my world came crashing down. She was my all, my everything, my light, my purpose, everything I did was her, all that I lived for was her.

My Emily.

I just stared at her, marveling at how perfect she was with her light brown skin and pitch-black hair. She had the most succulent lips I had ever seen and then desire to kiss her until she couldn't even remember her name went through me.

Then, the wolf awoke. Springing to life like he had been waiting for this moment for ages, he growled appreciatively, making me look at her thighs, so soft and full like her breasts.

I wanted her.

I needed her.

She was _MINE!_

"Why don't you take a picture," she snorted as she took in my stares and my new appearance, "it'll last longer."

Why would I want a picture when I could have the real thing? The wolf growled in approval.

_Yes,_ he said lustfully in my head, _make her yours, claim her as your mate, as your bitch, your property._

God, she was so damn perfect, I had to have her.

_Then take her._

I stood up, letting her see how big I really was, letting my size intimidate her so that she would be less likely to fight when I fucked her.

"Wow," she said her eyebrows rising on her perfect forehead, "you're really big."

I chuckled. She was about to find out how big I really was.

"I like to work out," I said huskily as I walked towards her, slowly so as not to spook her. Just like I was approaching a deer in the forest that I wanted to eat. I had been eating animals in wolf form to keep from starving and, though it was disgusting, some of them actually tasted pretty good.

She probably tasted _really_ good. Her scent alone had given me a hard-on.

_Only one way to find out._

"I-I can see that," she stuttered as I came right up in front of her, only a few inches from where she stood. As I towered over her I felt the urge to touch her, to feel how soft her skin was.

I reached my hand out and touched her cheekbone, enjoying how soft her skin was underneath my fingertips.

"What?" Emily asked, sounding freaked.

"Hmm?" I asked, too occupied with cupping her face with my hand to really pay attention.

"You...called me beautiful," she said, starting to pull away from me.

I felt a momentary flash of anger rush though me but I quelled it. She would learn not to shy away from me; she would realize that denying me was stupid.

"Emily," I said, deciding that being direct was the best option at the moment.

"What?" she asked as she slowly started backing into a wall. She was practically handing herself to me on a silver platter.

"I'm going to fuck you," I said before adding, "Hard." Might as well be honest.

It took about ten seconds for my words to register.

It took five more for her to back herself fully into the wall, trapping herself.

It took me one to pin her to the wall and crush my lips onto hers.

God, I was right, she tasted _amazing._ Like honey and cinnamon with a little bit of chocolate swirled in. I thrust my tongue into the moist cavern of her mouth, reveling in the sensation of running my tongue over her teeth, mixing my saliva with hers.

I opened my eyes so I could see her face and realized that she was trying to push me off of her. I growled, not liking her resistance.

"You're not going to get me to stop," I growled warningly at her "so you can stop trying."

I heard her take a breath of air that she was obviously going to use for a scream. A scream that could alert the neighbors and interrupt us.

And I would hate to have to kill them.

I clamped my hand over her mouth before attacking her neck, nipping and sucking on the smooth skin as I used my other hand to fondle her breast. I wanted to suck her nipples, to hear her moan in pleasure but I knew that it would be better for both of us if I just fucked her.

_Claim first, pleasure later._

I picked her up into my arms while still keeping my grip on her mouth and carried her into her room. I had played in this room many times with her and it felt kind of wrong to taint it with the rape that was about to happen but I knew she would be a little less feisty if she was in her own bed.

I kicked the door open, taking in the room with a glance. It was a basic white room with a bed and dresser. Some of her clothes were strewn about and her smell was everywhere, making me even more turned-on than I was before.

I placed Emily on the bed, making sure that I was gentle with my movements. She had stopped fighting me and was silent, just watching me with wide, gorgeous, terrified eyes.

I let go of her mouth pinned her hands above her with one of mine, thereby keeping her from using her arms to hit me. It wouldn't hurt me, but she might injure herself and that would annoy my wolf. After thus assuring that she was unable to damage herself I gently spread her legs, feeling the wolf growl as she began to resist again.

"Sam, stop," she pleaded, trying to pull her soft leg out of my grip.

_Uh-uh, not happening._

I growled and tightened my grip as I slid my hand onto the top of her pants

"I'm a virgin!" she screamed, struggling all the more.

Of all the things she could have said, that was the worst one. The thought that I was going to be the first one inside of her, the first one to fuck her senseless, was too much.

"Good," I growled as I began to pull her pants down, "I'll be your first."

_And your last_

***End Memory (Seth's POV)***

I blinked in surprise as I pulled out of Sam's memory, the confusion overriding my disgust. I watched Sam phase back into human form, following suit a few seconds later.

"What happened?" I asked after I had finished pulling my clothes on, my voice a little harsher than it should have been. Sam looked tired and depressed, like he had just seen the worst thing in the world.

He sighed, not looking at me.

"I raped her," he said simply.

"Yeah, I kind of guessed that," I snapped, feeling anger at my brother for doing something so vile and contemptible. I even wondered if he had forced Emily into marrying him.

But Emily had seemed so happy the day she married him. She did the whole crying and smiling thing and she seemed so in love with Sam. What changed her mind? What made her forgive him?

As if sensing my thoughts Sam spoke again, sounding heartbroken.

"After I was finished, I put some clothes on her and took her away while she was unconscious," he said, his hands in his pockets, "I took her towards the house but she got away from me. I lost control and, well, you know the rest."

I scowled at him.

"No, actually, I don't," I said acidly, "I still don't know why she ever forgave, let alone married you, after what you did to her."

Sam was my brother, but I wasn't just going to forgive him and tell him I understand or some other crap like that. He was family, and family deserved honesty.

He sighed, finally looking at me.

"Emily stayed at the house for a few days, refusing to speak to anyone. I told mom and dad about what had happened and they told me that I was a shape-shifter, the first of my generation. They told me Jacob Black was the rightful alpha but until he phased I was the head honcho. They didn't judge me, they knew about how the wolf can twist a person's thoughts so that what they are about to do seems right, no matter how bad it really is. They both tried to explain things to her but she refused to listen, accusing them of being league with me and said that I was planning to rape her again."

He crossed his arms across his chest, looking like he was in pain. "I almost did...several times."

I gaped at him. He was unbelievable. "What about her parents?" I asked. "Why didn't she call the police or something?"

"Emily didn't want anyone to know what had happened," Sam said, "I think she was afraid that I would kill them if she told. Emily didn't want to go home, so we told her parents the whole bear story and said that she could stay at our house until she fully recovered. They were completely fine with this; Emily's mom thought it would be the perfect way for us to be together.

Boy, she had no idea just how close they had been.

"Anyway, a week after the incident, Jacob phased and-"

A voice cut him off, calling out into the darkness with a clear note of panic in its tone.

"Sam! Seth!"

We both turned our heads towards the direction the noise came from. Without a word we both ran towards the house.

"A vampire?" Jacob shouted, jumping to his feet, anger on his face. The pack had already gathered in the living room when we arrived, all seeming nervous. Then Jared had sprung the news.

"Plural, there's more than one," Jared said, looking nervous and excited at the same time. He had been wanting to fight for a long time, and here was his chance, I suppose.

"How many?" Jacob growled, glancing at me as if to make sure I was still sitting two feet away from him instead of in the middle of the woods, attacking a group of bloodsuckers on my own. Idiot.

"About a dozen, maybe more," Jared said with confidence.

Jacob merely nodded, his arms crossed, deep in concentration. I wondered if it was possible to throw something at him without jarring him to his senses.

"Alright," he finally said, uncrossing his arms, "Quil and Jared are with me," he said before turning to Sam as he held Emily in his arms, looking tense, "Sam, Embry, Leah, and Paul are with you."

Sam merely nodded before giving his wife a brief kiss and leaving with his pack-mates.

It was so confusing, watching her return the kiss after having seen her underneath Sam, screaming, begging for him to stop. It was the biggest paradox since the invention of peanut butter and jelly in one jar.

I looked at Jacob after Sam and company had left. "What about me?" I asked.

Jacob gave me a long ways glance, his look softening slightly.

"You're going to stay here with Emily and you're not going to leave." He said simply as he walked with Jared, who was looking like he might piss his pants with excitement, and Quil, who shot me a sympathetic gaze.

I gaped at the dominant werewolf. Was he seriously putting me under house arrest like I was a criminal? Was it a crime to want to help?

"Like hell I will," I growled, getting up off the couch I had been sitting on and making my way towards the door.

I felt Jacob's arms go around me and, next thing I knew, he was carrying me up the stairs in his arms. He walked into my room, kicking aside some shoes and articles of clothing as he went, me fighting him as hard as I could.

He set me on the bed before straightening up, his gaze threatening.

"I said," he growled as he towered over me, "you're staying here."

Without another word, he turned on his heel and strode towards the hall.

I clenched my fists in anger as I sat on the bed, feeling anger and frustration seep through me like a murderous toxin.

"Gee," I snarled under my breath, mostly for my own benefit, "I guess I'll just have to call the police and let them know I'm being held hostage."

Jacob stopped in the doorway and I realized with a sinking feeling that he had heard me.

He took a deep breath, steadying himself before walking over to the bedside table and picked up the house phone that lay on its surface. I saw what he was planning a second before it happened. With a crack of plastic and a crunch muffled by his hand, Jacob crushed my phone in his iron grip.

He turned to me, his eyes blazing with withheld anger. "You aren't calling anyone or going anywhere," he snarled viciously, his rigid pose reeking of untold threats.

He walked towards the door, the shattered remains of my phone still in hand.

My temper rose like a hot air balloon in my chest, obstructing all reason as the frustration of Sam's memory and his expectation for me to just give in to Jacob now that I wasn't able to deny that he couldn't control himself, shooting through my veins. Sam may have experienced what Jacob was going through to a small degree, but that didn't make me like Jacob. I was being selfish and biased, again, but I didn't care. I was sick of just keeping my opinions locked away inside of me because I was afraid of being raped.

It was time to trust my instincts, close my eyes, and leap, metaphorically, of course. There was no way I would close my eyes with Jacob around, plus my instincts would probably tell me to submit and jumping wouldn't solve anything.

So why did I use that phrase? Because it sounded cool.

"You can't order me around!" I shouted, "I'll go where I want and there is nothing that you can do to stop me! You broke the phone, so what? You lock the door, whatever, I'll just go out the window and if I break my neck then you'll just have to find someone else to control!"

He stopped at the doorway of my room, listening to my rant with his back to me. As I went on, his body began to slowly tense as if trying to withhold back the tremors that now shook his hands.

I continued, ignoring the wolf's voice that was screaming at me to stop, "You think that just because you imprinted on me you can tell me what to do! But buddy, I'm not going to just stand by while the rest of you are fighting! _I'm not yours!_"

He suddenly whipped himself around, his eyes burning. I heard a miniscule crash as the remains of the phone toppled from his hand.

With a growl he moved towards me, his hands clenched at his sides. I tensed, having expected this as I moved away from him. Unfortunately, I tripped over the shoes that were still scattered on the floor and it caused me to stumble against the wall.

He was suddenly against me, his body pressed flush against mine, sandwiching me between his burning form and the icy cold wall. My torso, pressed against his chest, felt like it was on fire, my back, flat against the wall as I tried to get my body as far away from his as possible.

He glared at me, but not with lust; with a dark determination. "That's what you think," he growled in a low, threatening voice.

"Jacob..." I tried to say, my voice warning. He cut me off with a sharp growl, threatening in its animalistic tone.

Then he smashed his face against mine, his lips jerking my jaw around before I managed to clamp my mouth shut. He grabbed my hands and put them around his neck before releasing them. Not knowing what else to do I left them hanging limply. I felt his heart thudding roughly in his chest and the blood pounding in the veins along his neck. My heart was pounding as well but with terror rather than exaltation and his had a panicked rhythm that was both pain and anticipation.

His lips moved roughly against mine, his head leaning down to reach my mouth better. One of his hands was at the back of my head; his fingers twisted in my hair, keeping my head from turning away from his, the other around my back, pulling my waist to his.

His lips, finding that mine refused to respond, became more insistent, moving with such strength that my lips were forced open, his tongue running along my teeth and his breath filling my mouth.

"Kiss me back," he muttered hoarsely, his aroused scent filling my nostrils. I winced as I felt his control settle over me, making my mouth begin to respond to him against my will, moving weakly with his.

He removed his hand from my waist and grabbed my jaw, jerking my mouth open easily. As soon as it felt an opening, Jacob's tongue was in my mouth, familiarizing itself with the interior.

I had never felt so terrified of being raped than at that moment. The feeling of dominance and possessiveness he always imposed was overpowering. The feeling of his tongue moving inside my mouth was so incredibly intimate that it was completely perverse and I felt my own tongue asking for the permission to enter the space between his teeth. He eagerly granted me access and my tongue began to enter.

I felt a fresh surge of panic race through me.

What was I doing? I was only a few steps from losing myself to him! I knew I had to stop or else there was no way I could keep his hormones from overriding his thought process.

I had to regain control of myself...somehow.

_Voice, oh voice, where hast thou gone, didst thou tarry inside my head too long? _Wait, I was making up a rhyme in order to call my wolf? I was completely nuts.

_So, finally ready to listen?_ The voice cooed at me.

_Yes,_ I spat mentally.

_Good, you need to tense, his order is forcing you to relax, if you do the opposite, it will override his control._

I did so as quickly as I could, tensing the muscles all along my body as the wolf talked me through it, telling me which muscles to flex. I felt his control over me slip off just in time for him to squeeze my hip.

I hastily withdrew my tongue and stopped kissing him. He didn't even notice, just kept making out with me as avidly as ever. I bit on his tongue, trying to force him to withdraw it from my mouth but he ignored me, merely picked up speed as his mouth continued its assault. I bit down harder, my temper suddenly rising as I felt a reminder of how weak and defenseless I was against him.

It angered me even more when he didn't react to my futile attempts above a low chuckle of dark amusement.

I removed my hands from around his neck -why hadn't I removed them in the first place; I'd never know and pushed against his chest, feeling the contours of the muscles rippling beneath his t-shirt with more definition than usual despite myself. I hated it when my submissive side made me notice things like that. It didn't turn me on or give me any sort of sexual admiration but feeling my eyes dragging over to watch the way his muscles moved when he walked or how he looked in black was annoying. And disgusting.

This action only encouraged him. Apparently, he thought I was feeling him up.

With an inhuman growl he pulled his mouth away from me and swept me up in his arms. He raced over to the bed and dropped me on top of it, jumping on all fours on top of me before his mouth started anew.

I felt my heart give an uncomfortable thump and I heard blood pounding in my ears as he hitched my knee on his hip, holding it there, and replaced my hands around his neck, his mouth never ceasing its violation of my mouth's privacy. After placing my hands on his neck he put his left hand next to my head, holding his torso aloft

As soon as he let go of my hands I pulled them away and placed them on the bed's surface, trying to scoot myself out from underneath him. My knee slid off of his hip as I did so and I applied both my feet to the task of getting away from him before he lost it completely.

"Jacob!" I shouted, trying to get him to snap out of it.

He growled once more and grabbed my waist with his left hand, yanking it up against his body, molding me against his massive shape as his other arm dropped down onto its elbow to better hold the back of my head as his erection pressed onto my groin.

I felt my body stiffen involuntarily. He was going too far.

He felt my new posture and it seemed to anger him. He began to speed up, but it felt more controlled, as if he was forcing himself to do it.

He finally stopped kissing me but didn't get off. Instead, he very slowly began to move his mouth along my cheek towards my ear. Once he reached it he began to slowly run his tongue along the outer edge. I felt like I was incapable of movement as his hand gripped my thigh.

"Seth," he said, "If you leave this house at any point between the time I leave and the time I get back you'll find that I am not above using violence."

He very gently bit the top of my ear, causing a shiver of fear to race through me.

He spoke again, his voice husky, "I can smell if you've been outside and I can track you if you try to escape. And when I find you," he didn't finish, only ran his other hand across my stomach a few inches from my crotch.

He nipped my earlobe a few times before he got off of me. I sat up and turned to him, not really believing what I had just heard.

"So," I said slowly, some of the anger I had felt moments earlier coming back just a little, "You're saying if I try to help then you'll rape me?"

He sighed, shoving his hands in his pockets. "No, I probably won't go that far, but there are plenty of things I can do to you that won't involve taking your virginity."

I clenched my hands into fists on the bed top, feeling anger rush through me as rebellion clawed its way up my throat and into my mouth.

"Probably?" I muttered, mostly to myself but loud enough for him to hear as well, "I find that hard to believe."

He growled, his voice dripping with dominance, "I once told you that I wouldn't hesitate to use force if that's what it took to keep you safe."

"You're much too brave for your own good," He continued, taking one hand from his pocket and running his fingers across the foot of my bed in a slightly distracted manner, "I know that you want to help, even though you're not made for it.

I gritted my teeth before turning my head away so I wouldn't have to look at his stupid face.

"But I _will_ keep my threat," he said, "Make no mistake about that. You may hate me but, as alpha, I have to keep my promises, both good and bad. And I _won't_ tolerate your endangering your life."

"Fine," I muttered, refusing to look at him, "I've been warned."

I heard him sigh then felt his hand take my chin and turn my face to his.

"Seth, baby," he whispered, his mouth inches away from mine, sorrow on every part of his face, "I know that you think otherwise, but I love you. And I'll always love you, no matter what happens."

I turned my face away from his. He let go of my chin and I felt him lean away.

"I'll see you when I get back," he said over his shoulder as he left. What was it with him calling over his shoulder? Couldn't he just say what he wanted to while facing me and then leave? He was the king of unoriginal exits.

I waited ten minutes after the pack left before I went to the window, checking to see if he had gotten anyone to watch me. I didn't see anyone with my werewolf eyes but I guessed that it was due to the fact that Jacob thought his threats would scare me into submission.

Ha, as if. I wasn't going to be told what to do; I was going to do what I was meant to do. I was going to help my pack protect our home.

I climbed out the window, being careful to close the window before leaving and began to run into the woods, knowing that I wouldn't phase until I was absolutely sure that the others would be too occupied with killing bloodsuckers to notice that I was helping them.

I knew I would probably regret what I was about to do but at the moment, I was willing to take whatever punishment he had planned if it meant that I could be on the edge, no matter how briefly.

I would risk it if it meant I could take my life in my own hands one last time before I was claimed by Jacob Black for the rest of my life.


	11. Chapter 11 The Comfort

**Disclaimer: I do not own Twilight**

Chapter 11 The Comfort

"What the hell were you thinking?" Jacob yelled at me, his face contorted with rage as I glared back at him, my arms crossed over my chest in a defiant position.

Like the moron I was, I had been careless while walking through the woods and had stumbled onto the pack as they discussed battle plans in the middle of the woods. Needless to say, Jacob was furious.

"I told you that I had been warned," I snapped at him, trying to convey my contempt for him with just a few words "Not that I would do what you said."

Jacob's shape shivered as a tremor went through him, showing that he was trying to get a grip on his desire not only to phase, but to fuck me as well.

He raised a shaking hand and pinched the space between his eyes, his brow furrowed and his eyes shut tight.

I glanced at the other members of the pack as they watched our little discussion. Actually, these 'discussions' were completely made up of Jacob telling me what to do and me telling him to forget it.

Sam had his arms crossed, looking like he wanted to chew me out for disobeying my alpha.

Well, excuse me for wanting to have a life.

Jared was shaking with excitement as if he was about to phase from anticipation alone. If I didn't know that he was totally psyched about fighting vampires, I would have thought that he needed to go to the bathroom.

Embry was his usual neutral self, arms crossed loosely across his broad chest, watching the proceedings with little interest.

Quil looked depressed, his stare focused absentmindedly on Paul's shirtless torso as the older wolf leaned against a tree a few yards away. I noticed that the young shifter's hand kept twitching towards his crotch, like he wanted to touch himself through the cloth and somewhat relieve the sexual tension I knew he had.

Honestly, the kid was hopeless. And lucky. I wish I could be that much in love with Jacob; it would make it easier for me to accept my life.

I had been accepting my life for years, content to be the happy little kid who was always smiling. But I had learned that being the defenseless one, the one that always let himself be protected, had its disadvantages. I was incapable of defending myself and this led to being confident that, no matter what, someone would always be there to save me. As a result, the first day at high school had been terrible. I had been mocked for my size, derided for my brains, and called all sorts of derogatory nicknames.

I had wanted to deal with the bullies myself, wanted to show them that I wasn't as weak as they said, but Sam went ahead and told them to fuck off. I was never teased again, openly at least, but I had known that they all thought that I was too weak to take care of myself. The silent judging had been worse than the verbal kind and I promised myself that I would never let myself be weak again, that I would make my own path, no matter what. I wouldn't let myself be controlled.

Or maybe I was just stubborn. Or stupid. Or a healthy dose of both.

I turned back to Jacob, who seemed to have a slightly better grip on himself.

"Embry," he said, his voice shaking slightly with his anger, "I want you to take Seth back to his house and keep him there. I don't care if you have to gag and bind him to his bed, but I don't want him leaving again."

I felt my mouth drop open.

"What?" I shouted, outraged as I stomped my foot. It was a useless gesture, not to mention over dramatic, but it felt like the good thing to do to help drive my point home, "You're still going to keep me at the house? I'm not going to put up with your stupid concerns and I'll be damned if I just stand aside instead of fighting to protect my home!"

His eyes darkened slightly but he kept his cool for the most part.

That is until I uncrossed my arms and held up my middle finger at him like the rebellious idiot I was.

Jacob's face grew even more enraged than before and, with a roar of frustration and anger, he smashed his fist into a nearby tree, creating quite a sizable hole in its wooden surface. An earsplitting crack and a resounding splintering noise shot through the woods as the tree groaned under the immense force it had been victim to.

I dropped my hand and took a step back, feeling slightly intimidated by this show of power. I knew that being alpha meant you were stronger than the normal wolf, but I had never imagined that Jacob was capable of such a thing. A normal werewolf could maybe do that to a normal sized tree, but for him to be able to make an gigantic oak tree shake like it was in a tornado only showed me that he was a lot lot lot lot lot lot lot lot lot lot lot lot lot lot lot lot lot lot lot lot lot stronger than me.

He turned back to me, shaking as he spoke, his voice trembling with all the anger he was holding in, "Seth," he snarled, "if I have to rip your clothes off right now, bend you over, and take your ass as hard and deep as you can handle without passing out so you'll go home and stay out of danger, I'll do it."

He walked up to me, the little bit of fear in my chest growing larger as I saw he was hard through the shorts he was wearing. I took a step back but his hands shot out and grabbed my shoulders, pulling me up to him.

His head dipped down and his lips brushed my ear.

"So don't tempt me," he whispered, earning him a shiver of fear. I felt him smirk into my skin and I pulled away. But not before he could bite gently on the area where his mark had been, as if to remind me that I was his. And, as he squeezed the section of ass I didn't know he had a hold of, only his.

Jerk. Moron. Bastard. Dominant. I couldn't think of which insult to choose for him.

He straightened up and gave me a smoldering look that made me wish the ground would decide that were I was standing was a good place to open a hole and swallow me up. Or Jacob even. Anything just so he wouldn't look at me like that.

He pulled his gaze away, his grip on my shoulders tightening slightly. He ran his eyes over his pack as they stood watching us, Paul disgusted, Quil empathetic and slightly worried, Embry seeming to be a little annoyed at having to miss the battle because of me, Sam looking a little angry himself, as if he also thought that I wasn't capable of taking care of myself. Jared probably hadn't even seen the encounter; he was still bouncing up and down like the tiger on Winnie-the-Pooh.

"The groups are going to be smaller," Jacob said, "But we need to make sure that we stay together. Those that get separated could endanger not only themselves, but the pack-mates that try to rescue them. Stay strong, stay fast," he paused and his gaze drifted down to me, that freaky smoldering look in his eyes again, "and when you think you can't go on...think of your family and friends and that you're protecting them, not just yourself."

It reminded me of a movie I once saw were the general was telling his troops much the same thing as what Jacob was saying. In the end, it turned out that it was supposed to be suicide mission that should have killed the entire group.

He leaned down again as the pack began to disperse to go fight the vampires. Only Embry remained, his arms crossed as he glared at me, the annoyance now more prominent. I felt Jacob's breath run across my face as he moved closer, his arms drawing me in until I was pressed up against him.

"I don't think that we'll lose this battle," he breathed as he began to place butterfly kisses on my face and neck, "but if this is the last time we're together, then I want to feel you one last time."

I felt real, genuine terror race through me as I began to realize what he was saying.

_Didn't add rape into the equation when you snuck out, did you?_ The voice snickered in my head.

Since when did my inner wolf get a sarcastic streak?

_Since you ignored me and yelled at Jacob_, the voice replied, a distinctly snappish quality in her voice now, _resulting in him very nearly raping you. If he had, he would have refused to leave his newly claimed mate and the pack would have been forced to fight the vampires on their own._

There wasn't time to reply as Jacob smashed his lips into mine, his ferocity catching me off guard. He backed me into the tree as he took my bottom lip into his mouth and sucked and nibbled on it. As soon as I my back was fully up against the tree, Jacob began to slowly grind himself onto me, pressing his clothed erection into my stomach before pulling away slightly and then reapplying the pressure an instant later, all the while his mouth continuing to move sensually, his tongue exploring my mouth with an eagerness that scared me even more than I already was. It was almost like he was trying to duplicate the movement of fucking me with his mouth and his covered dick.

I felt my lunch rise in my stomach and I briefly wondered how Jacob would react if I threw up in his mouth. He's probably think it tasted good like the sicko he was.

Or maybe, if I was lucky, he'd be disgusted and start to hate me and break the imprint, resulting in my freedom.

His hand suddenly left the shoulder it had been clutching and slid under my shirt, his rough fingers feeling my abs like they were the most amazing things in the world.

Looks like this wasn't my lucky day: my queasy stomach vanished. Damn it.

"Your skin's so fucking soft," he moaned, his mouth leaving mine and going across my face, nipping at my cheeks and putting the tip of his tongue on my skin at brief intervals, his body continuing it's grounding.

I whimpered as his hand traveled higher, towards my chest. Normally I would have been mad at myself for acting like a submissive but I was so freaking scared of what Jacob was going to do that I let myself off the hook, just this once.

I found some measure of control over my arms and pushed against Jacob's stomach, trying desperately to push him away.

With a gasp, Jacob attacked my neck, biting, sucking, claiming my flesh. His passion was so intense that it caused small amounts of blood which he quickly lapped up to ooze from the wounds.

"Mine, mine, mine," he whispered, his voice sounding delirious.

He had gone off the deep end. And a crazy Jacob making out with me in the middle of the woods meant only one thing: I was dead meat.

"Jacob, the pack is ready," Embry said, his calm voice breaking through Jacob's grunts, moans, and feverish whispers of 'mine'.

Almost as if his pack brother's words were a bucket of ice water dumped on him, Jacob's head snapped up, the passion and lust in his eyes replaced by determination.

"I'll be there directly," he said, authority ringing in his voice.

I stood frozen as Embry left, fear of being alone with Jacob going through me. Or at least I think he left, werewolves move so quietly it's hard to tell where they are.

Jacob looked down at me, his gaze hard and a hint of a wolf in his eyes.

"I'll see you when I get back," he said, his gaze getting more and more wolfish, "And if you put yourself in danger again...I'll break you."

He kissed me once more, making sure to run his hand under my shirt again before taking me by the hand and leading me to where Embry stood waiting, both their faces mask-like. Embry was probably just trying to hold in his laughter.

Without another word I yanked my hand out of his grip and stalked away

I didn't know what would happen tonight or tomorrow, but one thing was for sure, I wasn't going to stick around for either. Even if I had to run away to Canada, I wasn't going to put myself in the kind of danger that staying at Jacob's would certainly come with.

One thing was for sure, I was an idiot and I was going to look back on this and wince.

**(Jacob's POV)**

I smashed my fist into one of the trees that surrounded me, sending it flying into the darkness.

"Why can't he listen to me?" I screamed to no one, focusing my attention on a particularly problematic tree. I hit it multiple times, each hit loosening bits of wood and making the tree bend further over as I continued my assault. With a final kick, the tree toppled, crashing to the ground with a booming crash.

I had never been so pissed in my life. Not only did Seth ignore my order and sneak out, but he had the gall to fight a vampire when he could have easily just outrun her. I had been fighting the coven and we had been losing. Badly. Then Seth's thoughts suddenly joined the pack. He was running from something, though in the heat of battle we couldn't tell what, then he suddenly turned on whatever was chasing him. We only had enough time to see a red-haired female vampire leap at him before his thoughts vanished. In that moment, I knew that Seth was dead. That he had been killed by a vampire. Then I had felt nothing but pain, nothing but emptiness. I was filled with regret as I realized I would never get to hold him, never get to make love to him, I wouldn't be able to see him bear my children. I had felt so lost without my mate that I had just gone wild, destroying vampires left and right, not caring what I destroyed as long as I did something to ease the gaping hole in my chest.

It only lasted a second before Seth phased back, revealing that he had phased into human to catch the vampire off-guard and take her down.

By the time I realized that Seth wasn't, in fact, dead, I had destroyed more than half the coven of vampires. The rest were dealt with by the rest of the pack.

When I heard Seth's thoughts and knew that I would see him again, I had felt relief, joy, pride, and anger. I left as soon as I could because the last one was rapidly overtaking the other three emotions. I knew that if I saw him again, I wouldn't be able to hold back.

The memory and the thought of what could have happened to my little mate was too much and I broke a branch off of one of the fallen trees before I broke it over my knee like a twig. As soon as that was done I began to hit another tree like a punching bag, venting my anger and frustration on the wooden surface.

I had only lost control like this twice before. The first time was when Sam had explained that Seth needed to be at least sixteen before I could fuck him. The second had been when Seth had come back after he and Quil had talked in the woods. I had practically destroyed a patch of woods a few miles from his house but it was nothing compared to what I was doing now. I guess it helped calm me down, kept me from taking him hard and deep like my wolf wanted.

It seemed to work, my hands were covered in blisters and I was exhausted, completely drained of energy. This was great because if I had any strength I probably would have gone over to Seth's and raped him in his sleep.

The wolf had been unnaturally quiet, almost like it believed what Seth had said. _Maybe he is telling the truth_, he mused, his voice the softest it had ever been, _maybe he really had no choice._

I snorted as I began to stride through the forest towards my house. I was more than happy that my Seth had survived, actually I was ecstatic, but I was mad as hell at him for putting himself in danger. I was going to enjoy punishing him tomorrow.

_Even if he did meet that red-haired vampire bitch, he should have just run away,_ I finally thought back savagely as I stepped over the fallen logs, confident that by the time someone discovered the end results of my rampage/workout everything would be overgrown. To be completely honest, I had been exercising over the last few weeks, even though I didn't need it. I hoped that if I made myself more attractive to Seth, he might start to like me.

I guess it wasn't working. So, it would seem that it was time for plan C.

Plan A was for me to use dominance and intimidation for him to just give into me. Girls seemed to like that shit so I thought since Seth was my submissive it might work on him. Imprints were supposed to be the perfect match for each other and I liked dominating so I assumed he would like to be protected.

Plan B was for me to use threats, violence, and some more muscle to get his attention and to show him that I wasn't joking around. If I couldn't frighten him, I would show what I was capable of when it comes to him.

Plan C was the one that I was going to save for last. I had no idea just what plan C was because I had hoped to have slept with him by the time plan A was put into action.

I groaned as I walked into my backyard. My body was screaming in agony which meant I must have really worked it. I have amazing stamina, and it took a long time for me to feel worn out.

I walked through the back door and into the kitchen, pausing to grab some cereal and a bowl from the cabinet. Taking a gallon of milk from the fridge and a spoon from the drawer next to it, I sat myself down at the kitchen table and poured some of the cereal and milk in the bowl and began to eat, wishing I had someone besides Billy to talk to. I always called him that, though I wasn't sure why. I guess my idea of a dad was someone stern and forbidding and Billy was more like a lovable uncle so I didn't call him something I didn't think suited him. He was great to talk to sometimes, but he was as stubborn as I was when it came to my imprint and that was all I wanted to talk about.

Right on cue, I heard the squeak of wheels that betrayed my dad's presence.

"Jacob?" his gravelly voice was soft, almost like he was asking permission to enter.

"What?" I snapped, not looking at him, preferring to sulk instead.

There was a brief silence before he spoke again, his voice lighter, slightly teasing even. "May I come in?" he asked, his voice gentle. I could tell he was smiling, even though I knew he was scared of me.

I could understand that, I was the alpha and I commanded respect, even though I never asked for it. I guess something about me intimidated people, showing them that I wasn't someone they wanted to mess with. Seth was the only person I had been unable to scare. That was probably why I imprinted on him, because I needed someone to be able to stand up to me.

I turned to him, giving him my coldest glare. "I guess you can," I said acidly.

His smile faltered slightly but soon regained its former strength. "Sam called," he said as he wheeled himself in.

"Really," I said, feigning surprise, "what a surprise."

Billy frowned. "I don't like your attitude, son," he said sternly, his scowl deepening as I rolled my eyes.

"Deal with it," I growled, turning back to my almost empty bowl. Damn it, the remaining cereal was soggy as hell and tasted like shit.

There was another deep silence during which I could almost hear my dad thinking how best to approach whatever topic he wanted to discuss with me. "He said that you destroyed nearly half the vampires and saved the entire pack," he finally said, the pride evident in his voice.

I finished my cereal and turned to him again. He was beaming at me like I was the most amazing thing on the face of the earth.

I stood up, towering over him by a good three of four feet, annoyance going through me.

"And did he tell you why I did that?" I asked, my hands instinctively clenching to stop the tremors that were starting. I wasn't sure why I was angry, only that I was.

Billy's shit-eating grin vanished entirely as he took in my face. I didn't know what I looked like but I was pretty sure it wasn't like a happy camper.

"No," he said slowly, his thumbs running nervous circles on his arm rests, signaling that he was afraid of me, "he just said that you suddenly fought like never before, without any fear. Said that he'd never seen or heard of anything like it."

Good. I wanted to tell Billy what happened myself, wanted to lay out the ground rules for tomorrow.

"The reason I fought so hard," I said, my voice as controlled as I could make it, "was because I thought Seth was dead. I saw a vampire jumping at him in my thoughts and then he just vanished, I couldn't hear him anymore. I didn't fight for the pack like you want me to say, I fought because I had nothing left to live for."

I saw his face darken at the mention of Seth. He had been furious when he found out about my imprinting on a guy and he had refused to talk to me for a long time.

"Son," he said, his voice controlled as well, "I don't want to have this discussion again."

I felt the dam burst inside me and all of my anger rush out.

"Well I do!" I shouted at him, fury and anger pulsing through me like the blood that boiled under my skin, screaming for carnage, destruction and, well, general death to everyone. Like I said once before, it wasn't a good idea to be around the alpha when he was mad; the instincts alphas were born with made him unstable.

Billy, instead of backing away like the smart person would do glared back at me and spoke, his voice ringing with the alpha tone he had never gotten to use. His generation had been normal; none of the people of his time were shifters or ever would be. It was people my age who got the load of shit that comes with being a werewolf dumped on them and their lives snatched away.

"Jacob, Seth-"

"IS MY FUCKING MATE!" I bellowed, smashing my fist into the cabinet top next to me, breaking right through the granite surface and creating a hole that showed the pots and pans beneath, "And I want you to respect that!"

Billy was pissed. He stood there, his face pale with rage, his arms shaking as if he was about to phase, even though I knew he couldn't, his eyes dilating with anger. When I was a little _human_ kid, I had learned that getting my dad angry was a bad idea. He never physically abused us, but boy he could spank me until my ass was as red as a fire engine.

But I wasn't human and I wasn't a boy. I was a werewolf and I was a man and he had insulted my imprint with his unspoken disdain. He didn't even blame me; he thought Seth was the reason for the imprint. He had even gone as far as to suggest that I was supposed to imprint on Leah, his sister, but for some reason she wasn't ready. Since they were similar, my wolf had mistaken Seth for Leah and imprinted on him. I was still trying to figure out how to hire a workman without explaining the hole in the concrete that was the exact shape of my hand; the result of that particular suggestion.

"And why should I?" he growled, his voice low and filled with his anger, "What reason does he give me to accept him? He turned my son into a monster."

I stared at him, completely disgusted by his narrow mindedness.

"I was a monster my whole life!" I shouted throwing my hands up to help make my point, "I turn into a fucking wolf for god's sake!"

"No," snapped Billy, leaning forward slightly in his chair, "you were a protector, you always looked out for your pack and you kept yourself under control. But since Seth phased and you 'imprinted' on him," I gritted my teeth when he added the verbal quotation marks around the word, "you act like someone else, someone I don't know, you never lost your temper like this, you were always putting a smile on everyone faces, you were _happy_."

I stared at him, beginning to feel suspicious.

"There's something else, isn't there?" I accused him quietly, moving until I was right in front of him, "There's another reason you are mad about me imprinting on Seth."

I saw him begin to squirm uncomfortably under my intense gaze, refusing to look back at me.

"Tell me!" I barked, implying the alpha voice. I wasn't sure why I used it on a human, but it might have been instinct driven.

Whatever the reason, it worked.

"I don't want my only son's children to come from another male," he choked out, trying to keep the words in at the same they went out of his mouth.

I felt shock and then a realization hit me like a sack of bricks.

"You knew that Seth could have children," I said, feeling a small amount of understanding and anger coming out, "you knew about submissives and dominants but you didn't want me to know."

Billy said nothing, merely avoided my gaze.

"And you would have kept me in the dark right up until the day I fucked him and became a dad?" I asked, letting my face disappear into a mask. I probably would have looked insane if I showed what I was feeling.

Finally, Billy nodded.

I sighed; suddenly feeling like the weight of the world had been dumped on my shoulders.

"Dad," I sighed, sitting on my haunches so we were eye-level and took his hands in mine, noting that, big as his hands were, they still disappeared into mine, "Seth makes me happy. He's stubborn and refuses to listen to me, but I think that's what I need. I guess that if I had a submissive imprint I would eventually hurt them because I would slowly let myself get lazy and lose control because they would just give in to me. I could hurt them and any children that we would have together because I would be out of practice, unable to keep myself together when it comes to phasing. Seth keeps me on my toes, making me focus more on keeping a grip on myself. He forces me to work for his affection, and it makes me want it all the more. I want him to carry my children because I know he'll be strong for them and me."

I paused, looking at my dad, searching for any emotion but found none. I looked down at his hands again and gave a small laugh. "I'm guessing we'll have some pretty big and rowdy kids," I said, running small circles into his rough hands, knowing that mom used to do it to calm him down, "but I know that he'll handle it. He's just that kind of person. No matter what, he takes whatever is thrown at him with a determination. I need that characteristic in a mother figure to my children."

I glance up at him, expecting to see the mask or even anger. I saw neither. Instead, his gaze had softened as he looked at me like he used to do whenever I came out to the garage to help him fix cars.

"Son," he sighed, taking his right hand out of mine and setting it on my shoulder, "I can't doubt that you care about him," I felt my heart soar, and with it, the exhaustion of the day returned to my bones. "I just wish I could know for sure if he was your true imprint."

I laughed, standing up and looking down at him. I felt a lot better knowing that my father might just start to accept my wolf's choice of mate.

"Let me put it this way," I said, after yawning slightly, "every time I see him I want to chain him to my bed and fuck the living daylights out of him."

Billy laughed, appreciating the reference to Sam's comment on Emily when he first imprinted on her. It had been a dark time for both of them, but now they looked back on it and laughed, mostly because after I phased, Sam lost the alpha position and was completely and totally lost about sex. After Emily forgave him and let him make love to her he had no clue what he was doing and Emily later said it was like they were both virgins again. Sam was lucky to have imprinted on her, she was just right for him, which I guess was partly the reason she forgave him.

"Dad," I said before taking my leave, "Seth is coming tomorrow and I want you to treat him like he deserves, like my mate."

Billy gave me a tired smile, the wrinkles on his weather beaten skin growing larger as he said, "I can't promise you that I'll behave myself, but I will try."

I chuckled. "That's good enough for me."

I walked up the stairs, calling good night back to him as I walked into the bathroom. Once there, I stripped and turned on the shower, stepping under the cascading water.

I felt really good and exhausted like I hadn't felt in a long time and I took my time in the shower, going real slow on everything.

Once I was finished, I dried off and walked into my room, plopping down completely naked onto my king sized bed. I was so big; I took up a lot of the space when I was spread eagle on it.

I quickly fell asleep, dreaming of the same thing I always did when I slept: fucking Seth.

"Mmm..." Seth groaned as I stood over him, his head tossed back as I ran the head of my cock along his valley, pausing for a moment at his hole and pushing at it slightly, causing Seth to moan with pleasure.

"Do you like that?" I asked him huskily, feeling myself get harder at the thought of what was coming.

"Yes," he gasped, his body covered in sweat as he panted beneath me, "mm, yes, Jake, I (shit) I love that."

I chuckled and proceeded to push my cock into him. Once the head was completely submerged in his hole, Seth's head suddenly snapped up.

"Jake," he said, a sudden passionate light in his gray eyes, "stop."

I looked at him, confused.

Instead of telling me what he was doing, Seth pulled me out of him, making me growl at the loss of his body against mine.

"Hold on, hold on," he snickered as he struggled to his feet, "be patient."

I scowled at him. "I don't want to be patient," I growled, clenching my fists to keep from grabbing him, "I want to fuck your brains out,"

He merely grinned at me. Then, more slowly than I would have liked, turned around and bent himself over the bed, his forearms crossed, creating a pillow for his head as he offered his ass to me.

I felt a grin cover my face as I saw him bent over double, silently asking me to take him. With a snap of my hips, I slammed into him up to the hilt.

He threw his head back and screamed: "Fuck that feels good!"

I groaned as I felt him tighten slightly around me before I chuckled darkly at him. "Oh, you just wait; I'll make you feel better than good."

I began to thrust, taking it slow, letting him adjust to me while letting myself enjoy being balls deep his tight heat.

"Aw shit," he moaned, his head tilting back slightly.

"So fucking tight," I hissed, my hands on his hips, tightening their grip as I began to slowly pick up speed.

Seth turned his head and looked back at me, his eyes dark and burning with lust. "Harder, Jake," he ordered in a growl through his teeth, "fuck me as hard as you can."

I smirked at him and, without a word, without warning, complied.

Slamming into him with all of my strength, I rammed his prostrate, making him howl with pleasure as I reached around his waist with my right hand and began to rub his cock slowly, one stroke for every three of my thrusts. I felt his pre-cum pour from his slit as I brushed it with my thumb, sending the slick juices cascading down my hand and onto his cock, making it slide more easily in my grip. I felt the results of my own hardness seeping out of my dick and into his hole, my arousal juices acting like lubricant that made me slid into him more easily. Taking advantage of Seth's pre-cum on his dick and my own in his hole, I began to stroke him faster as I pounded him until he screamed my name over and over, curse words like fuck and shit mixing in, making me ram into him even harder and faster.

I felt his hole tighten like a vise around my dick, making me feel every inch of his insides with the most amazing clarity as he came onto my hand. Staving off my own orgasm for a moment, I lifted my hand to my mouth and licked off his seed, relishing the taste.

I looked down and saw the Seth was watching me, an extremely turned on look on his face.

"Do you want me to come in you?" I cooed down at him, starting to thrust again, "And eat it right out of your tight hole?"

He smirked at me and began to move his hips to meet my thrusts, hitting his prostrate with enough force to flatten a tree.

"Yes, yes, like that, just like that," he panted, clamping his eyes shut and squeezing me tightly on purpose, driving me towards my release.

"Cum for me Jake," he gasped as he griped me tightly again, the ring of muscles around his hole contracting as he tensed himself, sending me over the edge, into bliss, in heaven, into-

I snapped up in bed, covered in sweat and panting. Looking down, I saw that my hand was around my dick, cum glistening against the red-brown skin of my abs.

I had been jerking off in my sleep.

Then, like a tidal wave, I felt alone. So terrifyingly alone. The longing for my mate and the desire for the dream to be real was yanking at my heart in the most painful way possible. The weight of my pack and the responsibility that came with it seemed like it had been turned into lead and dropped onto my shoulders. I felt insufficient for the duty I had to my home, to my people, to Seth. I felt despair and fear that I wouldn't be able to protect the ones I loved from the dangers of the world.

And, for the first time since my mom had died, I burst into tears, my head in my hands as I bawled like a three year old child when their favorite toy breaks or their pet dies. I just wanted Seth next to me, running his hands along my back soothing me. I had just left without even seeing him, without making sure he was absolutely okay, I had just told Sam to take him home instead of doing it myself like an imprinter should have.

I felt like such a failure as a mate. I was chasing my imprint away instead of showing him how much I loved him. I was a horrible person and I didn't deserve him, didn't deserve the joy of loving him, of seeing him round with my child.

I don't know how long I cried, how long I just sat there, wishing my dad could walk up the stairs and comfort me. He wasn't Seth, but at least he was someone.

My longing for Seth increased to the point where I could almost feel his hands on my neck, running along my shoulder blades in the most compassionate comfort I had ever felt.

Wait...was the back rubbing thing...real? I took stock of myself. Yes there was something rubbing my back. Probably one of the pack who stopped by to talk and heard me blubbing and came up here to 'sympathize' with me about my problems.

Well, I didn't want any pity. Pity wouldn't do me any good; it would just make me feel even worse about myself.

I started to tell whoever it was to go away when Seth's voice came out of the darkness like an angel of music. Corny, I know, but that's what I thought of when I heard him say: "I can't believe I'm doing this." He muttered the words, most likely to himself.

My head snapped up and to the side, hope racing through me.

Seth sat next to me on my bed, one hand still in the middle of my back. The little of what I could see of his face in the dim light was apprehensive, like he thought I was still angry at him.

"Um..." Seth said awkwardly, giving me a final pat on the back as I stared at him in disbelief. It was like I had died and gone to heaven; Seth had touched me willingly and it was to comfort me. I felt the tears rise in my eyes. I was so incredibly grateful to him; even the wolf wasn't urging me to rip his pants off.

I reached out, slowly, to touch his face. He pulled away, as if I might slap him. Normally I probably would have seen a brief flash of red and kissed him forcefully or something like that, but I was just so happy that he was here, just when I needed him the most, that anger sort of took a background.

I took my hand back and gave him a watery smile, silently thanking him. He crossed his arms across his chest, looking even more awkward than before.

"Er," he finally said, uncrossing his arms and holding out what looked like my cellphone to me. It was difficult to tell in the dark, plus my eyes were too interested in his face to really take any notice, "you left this and Sa- um-_ I_ thought that you might need it back."

I took the object; yes it definitely was my cellphone.

"Thank you," I whispered, trying to convey my gratitude for his letting down his defenses long enough to make me feel better...as well as for the phone.

He gave me a small smile and stood up.

"I should probably get going..." he said, his hands in his pockets. I couldn't let him go, not when I needed him to stay with me.

"Please," I whispered, taking a hold of the arm nearest to me, making sure I didn't squeeze it or anything, "will you sleep next to me?"

He yanked his arm away, causing a stab of pain and a measure of loneliness to go through me. I looked at him, feeling afraid of being alone again, terrified that the feeling of despair would return.

Seth was silent for a moment. I couldn't see his face, he was standing in shadow, but I could tell he was thinking.

"Can I borrow your phone?" he asked quietly, holding out his hand for it. I obliged, wondering what he was going to do.

He flipped my phone open, the light of the screen illuminating his scowling face as he pushed buttons on the keypad for a few minutes while I waited with baited breath. He paused for a few seconds before doing it again. After finishing, he shut the phone and handed it back to me.

"Thanks," he muttered, his hands going back to his pockets.

I didn't say anything, convinced that he was leaving me alone to deal with the dreams, with the loneliness.

Then, to my complete and utter joy and astonishment, he got into the bed and pulled the covers up over his bare feet and shorts until it came to rest in the middle of his gray t-shirt.

I felt like I was going to explode with joy and gratefulness. My mate wasn't leaving me, he was going to stay, he was going to comfort me. I felt another tear start to form in my eye but I quickly wiped it away, getting into the bed and climbing onto the other side.

We lay there for several moments in silence, the sounds of the house settling back into its foundation adding a little noise to the quiet.

But I still felt alone.

"Seth?" I called quietly, hoping against hope that he wasn't asleep.

There was only silence in reply and I was almost convinced that he had fallen asleep when he replied, "Hm?"

I took a deep breath and asked my question, praying that he wouldn't get mad and leave me.

"Will you let me hold you?" Silence. Again.

Then, Seth moved closer to me, giving me sign to wrap my arms around his waist and pull him up to me, his back to my chest. I held him in a loose grip instead of tightly like I usually did. I trusted him and I was showing it by not imprisoning him in my embrace.

I sighed and gently pressed my mouth to the back of his neck, inhaling his scent. I knew I wasn't going to let him off of his punishment tomorrow, but I knew for sure that whatever it was, it was going to be very minor compared what I had originally planned: tying and gagging him to my bed before giving him a homemade tattoo that said: "I Belong To Jacob Black."

"I love you Seth," I whispered as I drifted off into peaceful dreams of Seth, myself, and our children, finally at peace, however temporarily, with myself and the world.

Just before I drifted off, I could have sworn I heard him whisper in a sad voice: "I know, I just wish it was the same for me."

I didn't know what would happen tomorrow, but we both knew, without saying it, that things would go back to the way they were despite what was happening right now. I would continue to dominate him and he would keep on defying me. It probably wouldn't end until I finally claimed him as mine but until then I was content to just hold him, happy that my mate was hopefully starting to see that I was a human being who was capable of feeling an emotion other than lust underneath the possessive exterior of the werewolf who wanted nothing more than to get in his pants,

I was happy because, for once, Seth was letting me love him, no matter how conditionally.


	12. Chapter 12 Short and Lemony

**Disclaimer: I do not own Twilight**

Chapter 12 Short and Lemony

I ran my tongue over Seth's neck, licking over my mating mark as I fondled his ass and palmed his cock through his shorts. I knew I was dreaming because there was no way Seth would let me do this in real life, but I was determined to enjoy myself, even if it was only a dream.

"Jakey," Seth whined as I continued to torture him with my tongue on his skin and my hands on his crotch and butt, "stop -shit- teasing – oh god, just like that- me."

I laughed as I bit him again, causing him to squeal with pleasure as I gripped him harder. "Then beg for me, baby," I growled around the piece of skin I was currently nibbling on, "beg me to pleasure you."

"Please!" He screamed as I bit harder and ground myself into him. I loved how he submitted to me so readily, like he wanted it.

I pulled away and looked down at him as he lay underneath me, his legs around my waist and his fingers fisted in my shirt.

"Do you want me?" I asked as I pulled off my shirt, enjoying the sight of his mouth drop open and his eyes glaze with lust as he stared at my ripped body and bulging muscles. A smaller drop of drool appearing on his bottom lip as he reached back up and ran his hands over my abs, his face awe struck.

"You're so beautiful," he whispered, his fingers leaving my stomach and traveling to my arms, gripping my biceps. I couldn't resist flexing them, letting him feel my strength as he stared with wide eyes at the muscles that tensed along my body.

As his hands continued to explore me, I began to take off my pants, leaving me in boxers, tented from my hard arousal.

Instantly, Seth's eyes snapped to my crotch, his eyes widening further as he saw how turned on I was. I reached out and removed his shirt, my fingers gently brushing his nipples, eliciting another moan from my mate's mouth.

I smirked at him as I pulled my boxers off and threw them to the side along with my pants and his shirt. My own shirt I slid under him before removing his pants. I did this just in case there was blood. I would try to be gentle, but we both knew that I was incapable of controlling myself when I fucked him.

I was preoccupied with the act of getting out a condom and some lube when I felt his hand go around my raging hard on. My head snapped around to look at him.

His face was inches from my cock, the drool in his mouth even more prominent than before. Before I could react, he took me into his mouth. My cock felt...amazing. There was no room for thought as his tongue ran over me, his saliva coating my length as he sucked me, his head bobbing up on my cock as I groaned at the slurping sounds he made.

"Seth," I moaned, my right hand fisting in his hair, controlling his movements, "fuck, that feels good."

He laughed as he took me as deep into his mouth as he could, the head hitting the back of his throat as his hand gripped what he couldn't fit into his mouth. What can I say, I was an alpha, I was gifted in that particular area of my anatomy.

I was getting close to cumming and I knew I needed to stop.

"Babe?" I said as he bit down gently in the middle of my cock, causing a guttural moan to emit from my mouth as I tried desperately to stay focused. He pulled away, looking up at me with a confused expression on his face.

"Hmm?" he asked, his hand still moving up and down on my dick.

"Get on your back."

He stared at me, his confused look growing.

"Why?" He asked, looking down and giving my slit a lick that nearly made me cum all over his face.

"Because I want to screw your ass raw," I snarled, shoving him onto his back and attacking his lips.

I didn't mean to be rough; it was just that I was so damn horny from all his fucking awesome teasing.

I positioned myself at his entrance and slammed in, all thoughts of a condom and lube completely gone from my mind.

He screamed as I thrusted, my name wonderfully melding with curse words.

It was way too short, my thrusts becoming more erratic as I pumped his cock, sweat dripping down me body as I pounded him until blood really did start to come out of his ass.

I finally came, biting down on his mating mark again as Seth shot his release onto my stomach with a scream.

I glanced down at Seth, feeling bad about being so rough, as I saw the blood oozing from his hole and from where I bit him.

"Seth," I started when he shushed me, pulling me down on top of him.

"It's okay," he whispered as he kissed my cheek, "it was worth it."

I smiled down at him as he fell asleep underneath me, his look peaceful.

It may be only a dream, but it was one of the best I had ever had.


	13. Chapter 13 The Reason

**Disclaimer: I do not own Twilight**

**Chapter 13 The Reason**

**Seth POV**

I was an idiot.

Plain and simple.

A complete and total idiot.

As I lay on my back on Jacob's bed with the owners head on my chest, his torso covering me and his crotch way too close to mine, I reflected on that fact.

I was an idiot for letting my pity for Jacob make me go up to his room to discover the reasons for his sobs, instead of just leaving the phone Sam had ordered me to take back to Jacob on the counter.

I was an idiot for agreeing to stay the night.

But, most of all, I was an idiot for not seeing that Jacob was FUCKING NAKED!

I mean, how hard is it not to see that the guy in front of you doesn't have a single article of clothing and is horny as a dog in mating season to boot? And then, I actually agreed to sleep in the same bed as him and didn't even notice that he was naked when he crawled over me and pulled me up next to him!

Did I have a death wish? Did I want to get raped in my sleep by a stark naked werewolf? Of course not, but I was still an idiot for letting my guard down and allowing pity for Jacob get the better of me.

I sighed, with nothing to do except remember last night adventures.

Embry and I had been headed towards my house, just minding our own business, when two leeches jumped us. He tried to fight both of them while I made a run for it in human form, leading them away from the house and the very human Emily, but one of them got away, chasing me as I tried to evade her.

I shuddered as I remembered the look in her eyes as she chased me, the savagery, the complete and total thrill of the hunt with me featuring as the prey. Her fiery red hair rippling around her bloodless face as she herded me towards my death, cackling laughter adding to my panic as I tried desperately to evade her.

It was then that I had acted on instinct and phased. Apparently, the leech thought that I was a human, which confirmed that I indeed smelled differently, she thought that I would make a nice little snack after she was done tormenting me. It had surprised her so much, that she threw caution to the wind and flung herself at me. I phased back into human, my decrease in size making her fall far of her mark, leaving her back exposed.

One thing I didn't think I would be able to forget was the howl that I heard when I phased back into human form. It was pained and filled with remorse and I thought that one of the pack had been struck down. Rage and sorrow for the unknown brother filled me and I made short work of the Vampire.

After finishing of the red-headed bitch, I learned that no one had died. Rather, they thought that I had died and it was Jacob who had given off the cry.

Jacob had surprised me by, instead of raping me like he so badly wanted to, merely ordering Sam to take me home and keep me there, under the threat of...a blow-job.

I hadn't dared to disobey.

When I had gotten home, I realized that Leah hadn't showed up for the fight. Concerned for my sister, I had rushed in, only to have Emily inform me that Leah was "going through some girl stuff and you need to back the fuck off."

She didn't say it exactly like that but it was the general meaning that she conveyed to me after I tried to go into Leah's room.

I took the chance to ask her to tell me the story of how she came to forgive Sam; she promised to tell me soon but not today. Don't get me wrong, I understood what had happened and I had to agree she had a good reason to forgive him, but I just couldn't understand how she got past her prejudice of the guy. I mean, if I got raped, which I was going to be on my birthday, I would never forgive him, as I was planning to do with my future rapist.

But Emily and I were different. She was happy and I was negative. I was prejudiced against everything and she was as forgiving as the day is long.

Then, after Emily and I finished talking, Sam came in and found Jacob's cellphone on the couch and told me to take it to him. I had refused, naturally, but saw the error of my ways when Sam threatened to allow Jacob to have his way with me, showing that he was in a bad mood if he resorted to that in order to get me to do something.

All I knew, was when Sam was in a bad mood, inevitably Emily would be walking with a limp the next day. That was probably why she had been grinning when I left, knowing that tonight she would be screaming Sam's name with more volume than normal. Because when Sam was mad, it meant what Emily called "rage sex." What that meant was Sam would rip Emily's clothes off, tie her to the bed to convey his dominance and control, then literally fuck her senseless. Seriously, I had unwittingly walked in on them after they had had one of those rage sex things, and Emily looked like she had fallen on her head the way she kept blinking, trying to get her eyes to stop crossing. Sam had been pretty mad at me for this so Sam had to carry her everywhere the next day, because she couldn't walk from having to go through two rounds.

It was hard to believe that someone so quiet and sweet could handle the kind of sex that Sam brought. Or that she actually enjoyed, no, loved it.

Admittedly, I knew most of that from other sources like the pack mind, Leah when she was trying to gross me out, and the fact that Emily talked in her sleep.

Actually, that was probably a part of the reason that I had agreed to spend the night at Jacob's. On a subconscious level, I guess, I didn't want to spend another sleepless night with the symphony of Emily's screams and Sam's aroused and possessive shouts "so fucking tight" on high.

I kept my gaze focused on the ceiling, not daring to look down. I had made that mistake when I first woke up, hot and sweaty from Jacob's body smothering me. What I had seen was something I had hoped to never see.

Jacob's ass completely exposed. Apparently, he had rolled over on top of me during the night, making the sheets come off of his rear.

Admittedly, he had a nice ass, maybe even a great one, but to wake up and realize that the person who yesterday morning had threatened to rape me in the school hallway was laying on top of me with his dick between my legs and his naked butt on display was kind of unnerving.

As if, again, reading my thoughts, I heard Jacob chuckle, his hot breath going across my skin through the way too thin shirt I was wearing.

"Enjoying the view?" he asked, his arms tightening around my waist slightly as I felt him turn his face and kiss my chest.

I clenched my jaw at the cockiness in his voice. "Yes," I said coolly, "I never knew that the roof could be so fascinating."

He laughed lightly and I felt his left arm detach itself from my waist and pull the sheets around his backside, hiding his rear from me.

Thank God.

"Now you can look without fear of being awed by the awesomeness of my ass," he chuckled, replacing his arm around my waist and pressing his nose to my chest, inhaling my scent.

So many comebacks sprang to mind and almost all of them I wanted to fling at him but I was still in a very compromising position so I kept my mouth shut. It probably wouldn't be smart to make a remark when I was in the same bed as an extremely naked and hormonal werewolf.

There was a moment of silence as Jacob held me in his arms, his breath becoming gradually deeper as he ran his hand across my back

Then, suddenly, Jacob sat up, repositioning himself over me to where his hands were on either side of my head and his knees were next my hips, his head hovering above mine.

"It's not a crime to be attracted to me, you know," he said, his voice husky as his eyes ran over my face and my body as I lay sprawled underneath him.

"I'm not," I spat acidly.

He just grinned and rolled his eyes, obviously not believing me.

"Sure, sure," he said, laughing somewhat as he began to lower himself on top of me, the smell of his arousal suddenly making an appearance.

I gulped as I realized he was beginning to get turned on...and remembered that he was naked and we were on the second floor, where anyone with a wheelchair would be unable to save me.

He pressed himself against me, his exposed erection pressing against my leg, only cloth separating our skin as I stared in to his suddenly hungry eyes, forcing myself not to look down.

"If you don't find me alluring," he breathed as he brushed his lips against mine, "then why did you spend the night when you saw that I was naked, huh? Couldn't resist the chance to see how big my cock is?"

Anger boiled through me as his words, heavily layered with lust and confidence, hit me. He thought that I cared how big his stupid dick is? The only time I wanted to see his cock was...well, actually, I never wanted to see it.

I took a deep breath, ignoring the smell of Jacob's pre-cum, and answered as bitingly as I could with him grinding himself into me.

"I couldn't stand to see a dumb animal suffer."

He stopped, thank goodness, but he didn't remove himself. Instead he stayed motionless; his groin still pressed against me, his lips still on mine, his left hand gripping the back of my neck, the right hand on my hip. His breathing was shallow as he, very slowly, pulled away.

Leaning back onto his haunches, Jacob pulled the sheets around his waist, hiding himself from me. I didn't even notice, I was too shocked by his expression. He looked...hurt, like I had said something unnecessarily cruel, his eyebrows turning up slightly at the ends and his jaw tight.

"So," he said, looking away from me as I lay frozen underneath him, "that's the only reason you stayed? Out of pity?" He sounded disappointed, like he had expected me to say: "oh, yes Jacob, I wanted to stay because I wanted to suck your dick while you were sleeping like the weakling submissive I am!" or something equally perverse.

"Yes," I snapped, the confusion that his face inspired in me making me angry. It made me not only feel sorry for him again but…

Made me...

Want to...

Punch him.

And then...

Well, punch him again.

He merely nodded in response to my answer before getting off of me, still holding the sheets around his waist as he went to a chest of drawers next to the bed, opening one and grabbing a pair of boxers out of it before turning to leave.

"I'll see you downstairs in a few, I need to take a shower," he said as he left, not having even glanced at me as he exited, his voice sounding almost...like he was about to cry.

I felt a small twang of guilt at my heart as he vanished from my sight, his feet shuffling against the carpet in a walk reminiscent of one who had been told that he was going to be hanged the next day: like he had despaired of everything.

I tried to push the feelings to the side but they came back even stronger as I remembered his thoughts last night when he thought that I had died.

_Gone, all gone, my Seth, my little mate, gone, I'll never hold him again, he's gone, I need him, he's my heart, my soul, and now he's gone, gone._

I sighed, running my hands over my face as I recalled all the despairing thoughts that had filled his mind, the sense of meaninglessness, the pain, the longing...

The love.

I groaned, falling back onto Jacob's bed, my head and heart hurting from the all-out war they were waging. My heart felt sorry for Jacob, felt like maybe he deserved a chance, while my mind was still stubborn, like its owner, refusing to submit.

After a few minutes of heavy debating, I finally gave in to my heart. I would give him a chance.

With a sigh of defeat, I flipped my legs over the side on the bed and sat up, stretching and yawning as I looked around the room. I hadn't had much chance to observe it last night and, with the acceptance in my mind that I was going to cut Jacob some slack, I was interested to see what it looked like.

It was fairly basic, everything in deep tones of navy blue and dark brown, with a dresser, bed, unused writing desk and, as I set my bare feet on the floor, incredibly soft carpet. It was relatively clean, clothes were scattered here and there and various posters of rock bands and movies covered the wall across from me.

I sat up and walked over to the desk to inspect a few pictures sitting on top.

Only two pictures lay on it, a shot of the pack before I showed up and a small picture of me. I looked away, shoving the guilt that was clawing at me aside, and walked around the bed to the dresser, where several more pictures were placed.

There was an outside shot of Jacob with two girls I could only assume they were his sisters, but he was much younger and had longer hair. He looked like he was about my age when the picture was taken. I realized that it was just before he phased and took on the role as alpha. It must have been terrifying, turning into a giant wolf and suddenly you're told that you're in charge and you're supposed to lead the pack for the rest of your life. In a way, kind of, I could sympathize...almost. Jacob hadn't been told that, no matter what, he was going to have to sleep with someone he didn't like in the first place. But, from what Emily had told me, he had handled it well.

I looked away, feeling the guilt prick back up again as I remembered how Jacob had had a huge part in getting Sam and Emily back together. I was grateful, make no mistake about that, but I wasn't going to give in any more than I already was.

Stupid Jacob and his stupid almost-sob that made my stupid heart feel sorry for him.

Next to it was a picture of a wheelchair-less Billy and a beautiful young woman I could only guess was Jacob's mother. I stepped closer, peering at the woman that had a hand in raising Jacob. She was undeniably attractive, with the same shape and color of eyes as her son, but slightly softer around the edges. She looked quiet and sweet at first glance but, upon closer inspection, you could see a hint of mischief and fire in her, almost defiance in her look.

I made my way out of the room and, finding that Billy was mysteriously absent and Jacob was still in the shower, walked through the house, looking around me as I went.

As far as decorations went, the house was nothing special, probably due to the lack of a woman. Everything was slightly disorganized but nothing was unclean. It had four bedrooms; one of which was Billy's and another was being used as a storage room.

I was making my way back up the stairs to wait for Jacob in his room, ready to tell him that I was going to try and give him a chance when I noticed a door next to his room. Jacob was still in the shower so I opened it and went in.

The first thing I saw was a gigantic bed which was set up with its head against the middle of the wall across from me. From what I could tell, it looked like it was an iron bed, one of those ones made for really heavy people and it was about twelve feet across and ten feet long, a double king extra-long. Other than the bed, a few cardboard boxes and a dresser, the room was mostly blank, with white walls, and a window through which the dull light of the clouded sky came through.

I walked in, treading softly on the thick carpet and took a closer look at it. Reaching out and putting my hand around one of the bars that made up the intricate network of steel pipe-ish things on the headboard, I squeezed gently, fully expecting the metal to bend under my grip. Being a werewolf certainly had its perks when it came to strength. To my surprise, nothing happened, even when I applied more pressure until I was griping it as hard as I could.

I let go of the bar and took a step back. Then I noticed that in several places, the bars were bent, like something had pulled them out of position.

This perplexed me but I pushed it aside, maybe it was Billy's old bed and he and his wife...no, I didn't want to continue that train of thought. But still, even if Billy and his wife had been, er, wild on the bed, they wouldn't have been able to bend it, even the small amount that was inflicted on the bars.

So then, why was it here? It looked mostly new, so why was it in here, in this almost completely blank room?

Then, an idea sprung to mind and, against my better judgment, I leaned my head down onto the top of the bed and inhaled deeply. My head snapped back up as my suspicions were confirmed: Jacob had been jerking off on the bed.

Sick.

I shuddered, trying to forget the smell that clung to the otherwise smooth and crisp sheets.

But I still didn't know why Jacob was doing it on this bed, instead of on his own. It didn't make sense.

I walked over to the dresser and opened the top drawer, peering into it. What I saw was probably the three things I didn't expect.

Item No. 1: A green rectangular box with the words "Titan Condoms, Extra Large" on the front in black lettering.

Item No. 2: A white manual with "Metal Workers Iron Bed, Unbreakable and Comfortable."

Item No. 3: A pair of my boxers.

Instantly I understood. Jacob was using my boxers to jerk off, using my scent to arouse himself, to pretend like it was me giving off the scent.

But the bed and the condoms? I blanched at the realization. They were for me. Jacob was going to use the bed to claim me on my birthday and he had made sure that it wouldn't break from all the times he planned to fuck me. And the condoms...I didn't even want to let the words, _Extra Large_, even penetrate my mind.

Anger coursed through me, all thoughts of giving Jacob another chance vanishing as I was reminded of what I was going to have go through when Jacob finally had his way with me.

I had no choice in the matter, I was being forced.

I slammed the drawer shut and stomped out of the room, slamming the door behind me, my rage fueling me, cutting off all thought as I stormed down into the kitchen. I barely noticed what it looked like, only that it was made up of brown wood, dark gray metal and dark green granite counter-tops, one of which had a gaping hole in it.

I threw myself onto one of the chairs and just sat there, fuming, my arms crossing my chest.

After about ten minutes of this and Jacob still hadn't come out of the shower, I heard the front door open and the sound of wheels rolling down the hall towards me.

I looked up just in time to see Billy drive through the door, a white box on his lap as his black eyes instantly snapping to me while I glared at him.

After a moment of tense silence, he finally spoke.

"Good morning," he said curtly, wheeling himself towards me and setting the box in front of me, "doughnut?"

"No thank you," I said, just as curtly, pushing it away from me about an inch or so.

Another long moment of silence, during which I noted that the sound of the shower had stopped, went between us before my stomach gave off a loud gurgle, betraying my facade of cold tolerance.

I scowled down at it as Billy chuckled, his voice slightly less tense.

"Please," he said, a smile coming to his lips, "I insist."

I said nothing, merely stared at the box, weighing my options. On the one hand, I was starving; on the other hand, I didn't want to accept the hospitality of Jacob or his family, not after my discovery.

Billy solved my dilemma for me by opening the box, revealing all sorts of delicious pastries. Chocolate, strawberry, maple, sprinkles, even a few cinnamon rolls. As I watched, he took one, a particularity yummy looking strawberry covered doughnut, and took a bite, his eyes looking at me knowingly.

I sighed in defeat, the room I had just seen temporarily forgotten, and took one, chocolate, and ate. It was still warm and tasted of sugar, easing the cramps in my stomach. I ate a few more, two chocolates, a strawberry and a few cinnamon rolls, then sat back with a mumbled thanks.

"You're welcome," Billy said as he wheeled himself around and took the box, setting it on the counter.

We sat in silence yet again, though much less uncomfortable than before.

"So," Billy said slowly, starting up the conversation again, "tell me about yourself, Seth."

I rolled my eyes and turned to him, looking him straight in the eye.

"Look, Billy," I said, "I know that you don't like me, and the feeling is mutual, but you don't have to pretend to be interested in my life just for the sake of your son. You think that it's my fault that Jacob is a complete and total lunatic when it comes to me, and I can respect that. But don't act like you like me, okay?"

Both of us seemed to like the silence, since another one went between us as Billy looked at me, sizing me up. Then, a slow smile came to his lips.

"Very well, I won't lie," he said, leaning back in his chair and crossing his fingers, "I hate you, I despise you, I loathe you with a vengeance that shouldn't be possible. You've stolen my only son," he held up his hand as I started to protest, "Admittedly, though, not of your own choosing. But I dislike you for the reason that..." he trailed off, acting like he was listening for his son before he turned back to me, "I don't think Jacob would appreciate. I hate you because...you remind me of someone."

I blinked in surprise, this wasn't what I expected.

"Who?" I finally asked, leaning forward in my chair slightly.

He smiled, a sudden distant look in his eyes.

"She was like you, defiant, a rebel even. She hated to give into anything and she would rather talk than make love, which, as a hormonal young man, I couldn't understand."

He sighed and placed his forehead on his hand. Why was he telling me this all of a sudden?

"It is because of her, I think, that I hate you so much. Because I hate knowing how much pain my son is going through and knowing that you won't give him a chance."

I was silent, waiting for him to explain when he was ready.

"When I first met her," he said, looking up, "I was a reckless fool who took what he wanted and didn't care what the consequences were. She was the only woman I wanted but wouldn't have me and this infuriated me to no end. I tried threats, coaxing, all manner of persuasion, but still she wouldn't let me into her heart. And it was in the process of trying to break down her barriers that I began to see what a wonderful woman she was."

He glanced over at me as I listened. His look slightly forlorn.

"I won't bore you with all of the things we did to each other, but, after knowing her for a year, I was hopelessly in love and she hated me more than life itself. I tried desperately to show her how much I cared, but she would not give in and eventually married another. My best friend."

He turned himself towards me; his eyes burning as I suddenly began to understand.

"Your father."

I gaped at him, shock going through me.

Billy had been in love with...my mother? But...how? Why?

He sighed again, looking away once more.

"It was with more pain, sorrow, and anger than I can describe when I watched your mother wed someone who I had always considered my brother. I think Jacob got his possessive nature from me and I did many stupid things to try and break them up. But she refused to stop caring what happened to me, even though she hated my guts. It was she who introduced me to Sarah, the girl who would eventually become my wife and your mother was the one who managed to get me to see past my love for her enough to realize how wonderful Sarah was."

He chuckled and I got the sense that he was no longer talking to me.

"Sarah and I fell in love and I rekindled my friendship with your father. We were married and she bore me three strong children that were as steadfast as their mother and as stubborn and...reckless as myself. She raised the first two, Rachel and Rebecca, to be strong, independent women. But she always treated Jacob just a little differently, like she sensed he was special. She never knew of my heritage and never lived to see Jacob phase, but she still knew he was unique. He took it the hardest when she died. It was actually her death that ignited the transformation so early in his life, the rage, the loss. It was because he lost her...that he wanted to give up the alpha-ship. But it was because of my first love, your mother, that he kept it, though why I don't know and Jacob refuses to tell me or anyone in the pack."

Jacob had wanted to lose the alpha-ship but had kept it anyway? From what I could tell, he enjoyed wielding his power and I couldn't imagine him wanting to give it up.

Billy blinked twice and turned to me, looking slightly angry.

"I know what it's like to try and love someone when they won't return your feelings, Seth," he said, his face hard and determined, "I did some very cruel things to your parents, some very heartless things, but I don't think anything can compare to what Jacob would do if you leave him. The reason I hate you, Seth, is because of any imprint I have ever seen or heard of, you have the most potential to break my son's heart, like your mother did with mine. I hate you, because I don't want my son to go through the same thing I did, not with the responsibilities that are riding on his shoulders."

For a brief moment, I saw Billy as he had once been, strong and confident, and I wondered how all of this would have been different if he had phased. Would he have imprinted on my mom, or on Sarah? Something told me that it would have been my mom, and I would be Seth Black and Jacob would have never existed.

"Seth," Billy growled, his look almost threatening, "let my son love you, let him in. Then you'll see him for who he truly is. And if you don't..." he paused and leaned forward, the threatening look in his eyes increasing as his hands gripped the armrests of his wheelchair, "then I swear on the body of my wife I will make sure that Jacob has his way with you."

Okay, first Paul threatens to get Jacob to have sex with me, Sam tells me he would let him have his way with me if I didn't deliver his cell phone and then Jacob's dad says that unless I love his son, he find some way to get me to sleep with him. So nice to know I have so many people looking out for me.

For a long moment we sat in silence, just looking at each other, both processing what we had just heard and said. Then a door slammed and the thump of feet on the stairs betrayed Jacob's presence.

Billy and I both straightened up, casting each other one more hate-filled glance before smoothing out our faces as Jacob walked into the room. He was dressed in a dark red t-shirt that was less tight than all the ones he had worn before, but it was full of holes and covered in grease stains so it was kind of the same in the respect that it showed off his body and masculinity. He had a smile on his face as he looked at me, no trace of his earlier pain could be seen in his countenance. He was also wearing a pair of black swim trunks and had what looked like another pair in his hands.

"Ready to go?" he asked me, walking over and grabbing the box of doughnuts. Opening it, he took one out and popped it whole into his mouth, chewing happily.

Almost...too happily.

Was he like Quil, trying to hide his pain from everyone else, scared to show what he was truly feeling?

As he finished off the box and walked over to tower over me, he reached down and picked me up into his arms, his right hand supporting my head, his left on the back of my knees. There was no way someone could...well, maybe he was really good at hiding his emotions. Maybe I was just in denial that maybe Jacob could feel something other than lust.

Ugh, my head began to hurt from all the contradictions that I was making.

"Jacob," Billy chided, a smile I knew he didn't mean on his lips, "put the boy down so he can change into his swim trunks."

Jacob ignored him, his gaze concentrated on my face. Then, a grin broke out on his face, a suddenly sly look in his eyes.

"I don't know," he said, pretending to think it over as he held me against him more tightly, "I'm thinking that maybe we should just go skinny-dipping, now that Seth's seen how sexy I am without any pants on."

I didn't miss the little victorious smirk in Billy's eyes and I began to wonder if, maybe, the old man had a part in my unscheduled viewing of Jacob's ass. But how could he get up the stairs in his wheelchair? And, now that I thought about it, how was he able to drive himself to get the doughnuts? I had seen him in the driver's seat earlier yesterday morning and he seemed to be doing the driving, so how was he working the gas pedals and the brake if his legs were broken.

Maybe he had an accomplice, trying to get me to fall for Jacob. Or at least sleep with him for my own personal pleasure. Billy had shown that he would stop at nothing to help his son claim me, the man was insidious, but why would anyone else help him? He couldn't exactly just walk up to someone and say: "I'm trying to get this kid to have sex with my son so I need you to climb up into my son's room, where he's sleeping naked with the kid, and pull the covers off of him so that the kid can see my son's ass."

I tried to think of any pack members that would...

Paul? He had threatened to get Jacob to rape me so...maybe he really did hate me, though why I couldn't say. Maybe he and Billy where conspiring against me, trying to trick me into giving myself to Jacob. Though, yet again, there was no real evidence or reason to support that theory. Plus, outside of Jacob imprinting on me and kind of labeling me gay, we had no reason to hate each other and he was, apparently, dating my sister.

Or maybe I was just paranoid and wanted an excuse to hate Billy even more than I already did. That theory seemed easier to accept, so I just went with that.

"Go on," Jacob said, jarring me out of my thoughts, "go change, I asked Emily what size you wear."

I said nothing, merely let him set me on my feet and walked back up the stairs into his room, not letting my gaze focus on the door that led to the bedroom with the iron bed. I went in, made sure the door was locked, and changed as quickly as I could, pulling on the navy blue swim trunks and folding my boxers and shorts and laying them on the bed, hoping that Jacob wouldn't try and steal them or anything.

I walked down the stairs, only to find that Billy was alone.

"Jacob went to get the car," he said, the cold tone back in his voice.

I said nothing, merely crossed my arms and leaned against the counter. We sat in a very hate-filled silence, knowing that we were mortal enemies, now that I knew how far Billy would go to make sure his son got what he wanted.

Me.

After a few moments, the sound of a horn announced that Jacob had pulled up to the front. As I crossed the kitchen and headed down the hall I heard Billy call out to me.

"Seth," he said, hurrying to get to me, "wait a minute."

"What?" I spat, glaring at him like...something I hated. Like a coconut.

He smirked at me as he wheeled closer.

"Today," he said, moving up until he was a few inches from me, "if Jacob should act a little...frisky, expose your neck to him. It will help calm his wolf."

I wanted to ask him why I should take his advice when he was trying to get me raped but decided it wasn't worth it. I wasn't even going to try it because I knew that if I did, it wouldn't end well for me, so why tell the old bastard that?

Instead, I merely nodded, muttered "fuck you," and went out the door.

To my surprise, the sun was starting to peek through the clouds, signaling that it might be a partly sunny day. From what I could tell, not having checked the clock since last night when I had complained about how it was too late to go anywhere, let alone to Jacob's to deliver a stinking phone.

I looked at the truck where Jacob leaned back in the driver seat, looking comfortable as anything with his left hand on the steering wheel, the right draped across the back of the seat.

I didn't know what he had planned for me today but one thing was for sure, I realized as I saw his sly smirk and mischievous eyes, it didn't bode well for me.

Well, I reminded myself as I got off the porch and walked over to him, since I wasn't going to let him inside my head anymore, not after seeing the condom room as I'd decided to call it, I owed it to him to be able take me where he wanted for the _dumb animal_ comment, even though it was probably to the middle of nowhere so he could rip my clothes off and take me on the hood of his car.

I sighed, feeling despair creep through me as I climbed into the passenger seat, buckled myself in, and watched the house disappear in the rear view mirror while Jacob drove me to the unknown.


	14. Chapter 14 IT

**Disclaimer: I do not own Twilight**

**Chapter 14 **

**Jacob POV**

The water in the shower was hot, but not nearly as hot as Seth was when he was kneeling in between my legs, one hand on my thigh, the other on his cock as he stroked himself, making me nearly shoot my load at the arousing sight. His body was covered in water, his hair plastered to his head and his skin red from the heat.

Then, moving slowly, sensually, he leaned his head forward and gave a single lick to the tip of my cock before kissing his way up my groin, inhaling the scent that came from the pubic hair that grew around my crotch as he followed the thin line of hair that led from my cock to my belly button.

"Fuck Seth, that feels so fucking good," I moaned as my mate ran his tongue across my abs, giving each one special attention before licking higher and running across my nipple. I heard him chuckle lightly as he ran one soft, warm hand up my thigh towards my raging hard-on while his tongue continued to torture my nipples, alternating between them as he moaned into my chest.

I felt his hand pause just a few inches from where I wanted it to be and began moving in slow circles, making me groan out with want. Then, to my complete outrage, he lifted his hand off my thigh and pressed it onto the middle of my chest, using it to push himself away from me.

"Seth," I growled warningly, reaching out and grabbing his arm so he couldn't get too far away from me. What the hell was he thinking, the fucking tease? Not that I was complaining, I loved it when he did this kind of shit to me, but right now, I didn't much care for it.

"Yes?" he asked sweetly, his gray eyes twinkling with mischief. I rolled my eyes, knowing that he was just trying to aggravate me, which in turn only made me more aroused and aggressive.

"Get back over here and suck my damn cock," I growled, knowing how much it turned him on.

"And what if I don't?" he asked, running his hand seductively across his chest, trailing his way down his six-pack and towards his erection before rubbing his upper thigh, making me almost jump on top of him in my intense desire to ravage his little body.

But two could play this game.

I chuckled and began to mimic his action of running my hand across my ripped body, smirking as I saw his hand stop moving, his eyes locked on my hand as I ran it across my eight-pack before beginning to make little circles on each one.

"Then you won't get any of this," I said as I gripped my rock-hard cock and began to pump it, leaning my head back and groaning with pleasure. I kept this up for a few seconds before looking at Seth as he sat on his haunches watching me, his eyes clouded with lust and need.

"C'mon baby," I groaned, using the hand that wasn't pumping my cock to run over my abs again, flexing them underneath my fingers to show them off better, "you know you want it."

I saw him fighting to stay in place, waging an inner war with the side of him that wanted to keep torturing me, pissing me off until I finally just took him hard and deep like he liked it. And the other side, the submissive part of him, the one that wanted to pleasure his dominant.

Finally, he got up and kneeled in between my legs once more, moving my fingers off my cock and replacing them with his own. Pumping me a few times to get me as hard as I could get without cumming, he leaned forward, the water running down his back and dripping off his shoulders onto my thighs, and gave one long lick along my cum tube. He then ran his hand up my arms, pausing to grip my biceps, and began to rub the side of my neck.

"Aw, fuck!" I shouted as pleasure assaulted my body as Seth massaged my sweet spot.

See, every werewolf has a vein on either side of their body, called their "sweet spot," that mostly reacts to the touch of their mate. When rubbed, it gives off waves and waves of pleasure, somewhat akin to getting a blow job, except the pleasure comes from everywhere, not just from one place. You could always tell where it was because it felt good if you rubbed it while you were jerking off. I had actually found out about it from Emily, who had talked about how rubbing Sam's biceps and shoulders always turned him on, then got confirmation from my dad, who was an expert on all things werewolf.

He had told me about how it works and I had immediately taken a shower and explored my body while I jerked off to the thought of some faceless girl with big breasts. I had found that my sweet spot was actually two veins that ran the entire length of my body; from behind my ears, down my neck, intertwining across my shoulders and back, down my hips and thighs and ending at my heels. Since imprinting, I hadn't rubbed it as much since it felt unnatural to be touching myself there, like only Seth should be touching it and filling my body with pleasure.

"Shit," I muttered as he began to pump me while running his tongue across the head of my cock again, making my whole body scream out for release as he began to rub my neck faster.

Then he moved himself a little closer and took me into his mouth until the head of my cock hit the back of his throat. He moaned as he did so and the vibrations were almost enough to make me shoot my load. But, before I could do so, he pulled away, one hand on my cock, the other moving around to his own.

"You taste so good," he groaned as he pumped both of us.

Then he tossed his head back, his eyes screwed shut.

"J-Jake!" He gasped, his mouth wide open as his body suddenly went off of his haunches onto his knees, his pumping becoming more erratic, "I going...shit, I'm...damn...CUMMING!"

At that last shouted word he arched his back and shot his load onto the shower floor. His hand tightened around me as he came, very nearly finishing me, but I was so fascinated by watching my mate writhe in the grip of his orgasm, that I had momentarily forgotten my own needs. But Seth, as soon as he had come down from his high, looked down at me and grinned.

"I guess it's your turn" he said, leaning down and taking my length in his mouth. I felt ready to blow but he decided to torture me some more going around to my balls and giving them each a lick.

"Seth," I moaned as he took one of them into his mouth and sucked gently on it, "finish me."

He looked up at me, smirked, and said in a low, husky whisper, "As you wish."

Then his head shot up from my balls, taking my length into his mouth and sucking forcefully as he used one hand to knead my balls and the other to pump the part of my cock he couldn't fit in his mouth. He then ran his finger across my thigh and found the vein, pressing hard on it as he swallowed around me.

I didn't last long.

"Seth!" I howled, twisting my hands in his hair and pulling hard as the force of my orgasm shook me, "I'm...I'M...CU-"

The rest was cut off in a soundless, wordless scream as I came all over Seth's chest. The warm water rinsing it as soon as it landed on him.

I sighed, frustration going through me as my orgasm finished itself. Why was I torturing myself like this? Always imagining what I should be doing?

_Then do it,_ the wolf growled, _make it come true, show him you're not messing around anymore._

I gritted my teeth and looked down at the cum that was being washed off my thighs, hand, and withering cock by the shower water, rushing away down the drain like my stupid hopes for my control lasting.

"Shut up," I hissed under my breath, hating the fact that an image of Seth, buck naked and covered in my release filled my mind, making my cock twitch.

_You want it_, the wolf replied, _don't even try to deny it, you know he's yours. So take him._

I groaned, leaning my head against the bathroom wall. There was no point in replying, I _did_ want him, more than anything, but I still didn't want to think about it, it just made me even hornier than usual.

Waking up this morning had been amazing; I had been _naked in bed with Seth._ I had actually woken up an hour before he had but I had spent it by rolling him over onto his back and watching him sleep. I had felt surprisingly peaceful, there hadn't been an insane wolf in my ear telling me to rape him, last night didn't seem nearly so bad, and I had felt only my intense love for my imprint rather than the usual lust.

Okay, there had been some lust -maybe even a lot of it- but it hadn't been as pronounced as usual. Kind of. I still wanted to fuck him until he couldn't walk, but I had quite a bit more control than usual.

When I saw Seth starting to wake up, I had decided to give him a little preview of what he was going to enjoy, to sort of get to him, make him want a little more despite what he said or thought. One thing that was certain about imprinting was that it was impossible for the imprinted not to want the imprinter to some degree.

But then again, Seth wasn't exactly ordinary, his wolf didn't imprint. Did that mean that he really wasn't attracted to me? Was I...

I stood up, turned off the water, and stepped out of the shower, walking over to the mist-covered mirror that hung above the sink. Once I reached it, I took one of the towels from the rung next to it and wiped the surface, eradicating the cloudy residue that covered it. With that accomplished, I looked at my reflection.

I had black hair and eyes like Billy but my eyes were shaped like my mom's. I had my deceased granddad's firm chin and my skin was a mixture of my parents, tough but smooth, red and brown, not a freckle or a blemish to be seen. I had a great body, without any fat on me, each muscle perfectly defined and toned, giving me that body-builder/model look that a lot of people craved.

I had to admit, looks weren't the problem.

To cement this fact, I flexed my body, making all my muscle pop, veins appearing along my biceps and chest while my neck swelled, lending the perfect look of strength and power. Adding a sexy and confidant smirk, I had to admit, I was about the closest thing to a fucking sex god on the planet.

The three things I prided myself most about myself was my body, my cock, and my ass. Seth had already seen most of my body, actually I made sure he saw me half naked as often as possible, and I didn't want him to see how big I was until the night we actually mated because I knew that if he did...well, let's just say that my cock was extremely intimidating.

So that just left my ass.

I laid down on top of Seth, making sure that my rear end was exposed, and waited. He had woken up and stretched, letting me feel the soft muscles in his body loosen -giving me a bit of a hard-on in the process- then froze. I had waited for him to say something, but he had been silent.

I closed my eyes, trying to block out the conversation that had followed.

I hadn't been so sure that he was turned on by the sight of my ass; I had even thought I felt his cock twitch slightly at several points so I had been hopeful. But then...well, he said that the only reason he decided to stay was because he pitied me.

That hurt. A lot. It hurt that he didn't stay because he trusted me, that he thought that it was safe to stay with me in my bed without fear of me fucking him. That was what I wanted the most from my mate, his trust. Well, I kind of wanted his body and his submission more, but the wolf was partly to blame for that.

I groaned as I relaxed my body, my muscles aching from the insane workout I had gone through last night trying to keep my temper and hormones in check, the pain reignited by my posing. I would probably put about three pounds of muscle on, not that I was complaining, but I would need all my strength for today, especially with what I had planned for Seth and me.

I opened my eyes, my gaze drifting to the two bluish veins that bulged on either side of my neck, pulsing underneath my skin. I reached up and rubbed one gently, feeling it bend underneath my touch, the pulse rushing underneath my fingertips. God, I wished that it was Seth pressing down on it, pleasuring me with his fingers.

I shook my head to clear it a little, wrapped a towel around my waist to somewhat cover the hard-on that had appeared at the thought, and walked out of the bathroom, pausing at the top of the stairs to listen to the noises from downstairs

"Please," that was Billy, probably talking to Seth, "I insist."

Then I heard the sound of a box opening and paper rustling, the smell of donuts coming up to me. I smiled to myself, glad that Seth was eating something. He would need the sustenance.

I turned and walked into my room, rummaging through my drawers before grabbing the plastic sack that had the swimsuit I had bought for him a while back. I then reached into my laundry basket and pulled out one of my work shirts, full of holes and covered in grease. It wasn't as tight as I would have preferred, but it had the look that I wanted to get across: one of a runway model. I smirked; Seth couldn't deny my looks when I wore this bad boy.

Then, after fishing my own rarely used swimsuit out of the drawer, I pulled it on and walked down the hall pausing at the top to listen. There was no sound but the sound of Seth and my dad, silent as the dead.

I took a deep breath, going over the plan I had formulated in the shower before I had been seized by the image of Seth riding me like a cowboy, covered in sweat and screaming at the top of his lungs, thereby giving me an immediate need for my hand to make an appointment with my cock.

Satisfied with what I had planned, I took another breath and bounded down the stairs, a smile pasted on my face. Seth and Billy were sitting at the kitchen table, facing away from each other, their faces mask-like though there seemed to be some kind of amusement on Billy's face.

"Ready to go?" I asked, keeping my voice cheerful, not revealing the fact that I was still kind of depressed about him claiming to only pity me. I reached over and grabbed the box of donuts, immediately shoveling them into my mouth like my life depended on it.

Seth was silent and I turned to see what was the matter, careful not to show that I was starting to get a hard-on from the smell that covered the donuts. Seth's alluring chocolate smell, distinctive even amongst other chocolate scents.

I loved his smell. I mean, hell, I jerked off to a pair of his boxers on the Metal Workers bed that I bought for the night I claimed him, covering the bed with my scent so that when I finally mated with Seth, it would be on a bed marked by his dominant.

To my surprise, he was looking at me, his brow furrowed and his face contemplative. I then noticed that he had some frosting next to his mouth, looking like a freckle on his skin. I felt my mouth water, the incredible urge to lick it off of him filling me, to taste the sugar against his already sweet skin.

I focused on finishing off the donuts first then walked over until I was standing in front of him, looking down at my mate as he glared up at me, hostility overtaking the thinking look he had worn.

Then, before I could stop myself, I leaned down and ran my hands along his sides, nearly groaning out loud as I felt the slight curve of his hips and the swell of his ass. I felt him stiffen against my touch but persisted, picking him up with my hand gripping his hair and my other arm underneath his knees, holding him to me in a way that was... fairly innocent.

I almost expected him to put up a fight, to squirm and shout at me to put him down like he usually did. That was probably why I had done it; a part of me liked seeing my mate thrash in my arms. Guess it reminded me off all the fantasy's I had of him writhing underneath me, begging for more. Instead, his eyes clouded over and he got the same look he had had a minute ago, like he was lost in thought, his body perfectly still.

I could have stood there for hours, just watching Seth think, watching the cogs turn in his head as he contemplated who knows what. His way of falling into a thought so intense that he was completely blind to his surroundings was one thing I saw rarely from Seth that I liked a lot, besides his naked ass.

"Jacob," Billy suddenly said, smiling at me as I grinned at Seth, my smile real for the moment, "put the boy down so he can change into his swim trunks."

He must have seen the bag that I had thrown on the counter, next to the hole I had made last night. I really need to get that fixed, and soon. I looked back down at Seth, who seemed to be beginning to realize that he was being held by the person he seemed to hate the most in the whole wide world.

"I don't know," I said, tilting my head slightly to the side so it seemed like I was giving it some thought as I pulled him against me, "I'm thinking that maybe we should just go skinny-dipping, now that Seth's seen how sexy I am without any pants on."

To my complete astonishment, Seth _blushed_. I mean, he seriously blushed! Seth, the person who was always in complete control was as red as a fire-engine. I felt myself begin to harden as I wondered what thoughts were going through his head. Was he embarrassed because he really was affected by the sight of my ass? Did he really think that I was sexy, but was just in denial? The possibilities were fucking endless!

But he had that contemplative look again, showing me that he probably didn't even realize that he was blushing. Fuck.

"Go on," I said, working to keep my voice from getting husky and lustful like it wanted to, "I asked Emily what size you wear." Actually, I had asked her to just go ahead and buy the pair herself, since I would probably have wound up getting him a speedo or a thong if I went shopping myself.

He climbed, down, his blush fading but still evident. As he left I noticed, thankfully just as he reached the top of the stairs, that his pants had ridden down on his hips at one point, revealing the tip of the division between his ass-cheeks. Instantly I was hard and if not for Billy's presence, I would have yanked my pants down and started jerking off to the thought of yanking them down and rubbing it until... aw fuck, I really needed to get a grip.

Billy, obviously noting my condition as I leaned against the counter with a pained look on my face while trying not to touch myself, raised an annoyed eyebrow.

"Are you sure you'll be able to handle a day alone with Seth, Jacob?" he asked, his expression showing that he obviously thought I couldn't.

"Yeah," I said in what I meant to be a confident tone but it came out as a sort of moan, "I can control myself."

He glanced at my crotch, where the bulge was beginning to shrink.

"I certainly hope so."

I gritted my teeth, wishing I could explain that I had already been hard from that stupid piece of frosting on Seth's face and from holding him and seeing him blush. But he wouldn't understand how the little bit of skin had just added to my arousal. How could he? He had never been a horny werewolf alpha with a sexy-as-hell-but-as-stubborn-as-fuck imprint that happened to have the best ass in the world?

So I didn't say anything and left without another word, walking out of the door and grabbing the keys off of the hook next to the door before making my way towards the garage.

Once there, I took a moment to compose myself, leaning against the hood of the car I was in the process of fixing. I loved working on cars; in fact, it was probably because of how calm they made me feel that I hadn't gone insane with lust for Seth. Not that I wasn't already insane with lust, just that it wasn't as intense as it would have been if I didn't have a pastime to keep me occupied.

I ran my hand over the rough metal surface, grinning to myself as I thought about what I had discussed with Sam a few days ago, about what I had planned for Seth. Then I thought of what I had done to him this morning while he was sleeping and almost laughed out loud. I wanted to just give in and laugh for a few seconds as I imagined the look on his face when he saw what I had done to him.

But there would time for that later, right now I had a date with an angel. Or more specifically, a sexy-as-hell-but-as-stubborn-as-fuck werewolf.

I grinned, beginning to feel excited for the first time as I remembered Seth's face, bright red with embarrassment. With a little luck, today's activities would take me from mortal enemy to friend, maybe even best friend. But I didn't need to get my hopes up, I would be lucky if I didn't rape him in the truck on the way there.

I hopped in the driver's side and started the truck, enjoying the sound of the engine growling to life. I had worked on this old truck a lot when I had first imprinted on Seth to keep from fucking him, the result being that it ran a lot smoother than before. I drove out of the garage and made my way over towards the front of the house, honking the horn to let Seth know that I was here. The front door opened and Seth stepped onto the porch, wearing the dark blue shorts I had bought him and looking like the perfect picture of discontent.

_Well,_ I thought with a smirk, _he'd have a different attitude once he found where we were going._

Seth climbed into the seat, buckled himself in, crossed his arms, and leaned back in his seat, completely oblivious to the fact that his head was resting against the arm that I had thrown over the back of the seat. I felt my heart pick up speed and my pants become unbearably tight but ignored it, focusing on the road ahead.

There was a moment of silence when Seth suddenly spoke, his voice calm, though with a steel undertone.

"So, where are we going?"

I glanced at him, resisting the urge to slid my arm around his waist and pull him up against me. And then slid my hand into his pants and massage his ass. Then pull over and fuck him against one of the trees. Shit, those kind of thoughts weren't making this any easier.

"It's a surprise," I said, my voice more husky than I wanted it to be from the images my mind had come up with from the idea of ramming into Seth against a tree, filling him up with my seed as he held onto a branch for support, screaming my name in ecstasy.

He snorted, his crossed arms tightening against his chest.

"Wonderful," he muttered, his voice tense.

I chuckled and returned my gaze to the road, though I would have preferred to just look at him in all his perfection. As I drove, the silence began to get a little too tense for my liking so I reached over and fiddled with the radio, trying to get the knob in the right place so that it would actually make some noise. Finally finding it, I began to search the stations, trying to find one that wasn't country or gospel.

Then the modern hits station came on, a group I had never heard blasting through the speakers, filling the cab with the stupid beats and annoying noises that usually accompanied a band that was trying too hard to make a name for themselves.

It was annoying as hell, but Seth seemed to be enjoying it, humming along and tapping his fingers against his thigh along with the beat. I clenched my jaw so that I wouldn't smash the radio to pieces from the sheer stupidity of the song but fortunately we had gotten the station after the second chorus, so the song ended a few seconds later and a new one came on.

Now _this_ was something I could get into. It had an insanely catchy beat, though I couldn't remember the name of the song or the artist, and I found myself whistling through my teeth and tapping my fingers against the steering wheel. I heard Seth snort and I glanced at him, expecting to see him rolling his eyes or something, but instead, all signs of apprehension were gone from his face. I watched, mesmerized, as he rolled down the window and let the wind run through his hair, his eyes closed and his face completely relaxed. He leaned his head back against my arm, looking as peaceful as anyone I had ever seen, humming along to the song in a lazy kind of way.

I felt my heart rise in my chest as I realized that he was, dare I say it, relaxing?

Then, unfortunately, he realized that it was my arm that was behind his head and not the back of the seat, and his body stiffened, all signs of relaxation gone from his face. I quickly removed my arm, although a part of me wanted to keep it there, just to spite him, but the damage was done. The atmosphere was ruined. Adding to this, the song ended and a new one came on, this one by an artist that I loathed with every atom in my body.

I clenched my jaw and turned the radio off, glaring at the road in front of me as the frustration set in.

"Why'd you turn it off?" Seth asked, also sounding annoyed, "That's a really popular song."

"I hate how she flaunts herself in her music," I snapped, clenching the steering wheel as hard as I could, the feelings of lust and dominance suddenly returning. I couldn't understand it, why did my hormones decide to act up now?

The ringing of my phone interrupted the tense silence, thank God. I grabbed it off the dashboard where I had set it and flipped it open.

"Hello?" I growled into the receiver.

"Jake, where the hell are you?" Embry's voice on the other end, calm and controlled as always, even when he was cussing, "is Seth with you?"

"What's it to you?" I snapped, twiddling the wheel slightly to make it stay more in the center of the road.

"I was supposed to pick Seth up from your house and guess what, he wasn't there." He answered, beginning to sound annoyed. I smirked, glancing sideways at Seth as he sat with his arms crossed, glaring out the window. Fuck, he was so sexy I wanted to stop the truck and...no, I needed to focus. Woo now, fuck later.

_Or woo later, fuck now,_ growled the wolf.

"Jake?" Embry reminded me he was still on the phone.

Seth moved slightly, causing his ass to rub against the leather of the seat. God, I wanted him so bad. I gritted my teeth and forced my eyes to stay on the road.

"What?" I snarled, sounding harsher than I meant to but dammit, I was horny and Seth's scent was driving me nuts.

Then, as if he had rehearsed it, Seth suddenly jumped, shouting "OW!" before reaching between his legs and pulling out one of the wires that I had stuffed in there God knew how long ago for whatever reason.

"...Please tell me you're not doing anything that you're not supposed to." Embry's voice surprisingly tense.

I snorted and pulled the truck over, unbuckling myself and pulling Seth's legs apart. He froze, as usually happened when I touched him, but I ignored this, yanking out the rest of the wire and tossing it out the window before pulling back into the road.

"I wish," I muttered, returning my ear to the phone

There was silence on Embry's end before he spoke again.

"So you guys aren't doing anything?" he asked, sounding almost relieved.

I rolled my eyes. Leave it to Embry to assume the worst.

"No," I looked over at Seth, who seemed to be listening in on the conversation with his werewolf hearing, although his eyes were focused on the road ahead. I smirked then said, making my voice low and husky, "At least not yet."

I saw Seth stiffen and I chuckled before saying in my normal voice, "I'll see you later, Em, tell Sam I'll bring Seth home," I glanced at Seth, who was glaring out the window, looking extremely annoyed.

"At least," I said, not being able to resist the urge to tease Seth just a little more, "I'll try."

I hung up the phone and tossed it onto the seat in between us, pleased with my teasing. Then silence once again reigned supreme, filling up the cab like a toxin, choking out the air. I hated this, hated this awkwardness, how we could never communicate, never-

"How is Billy able to get around in this truck?" Seth asked abruptly.

"What?" I said, looking at him in confusion.

"Billy's crippled," Seth said, not looking at me, "so how is it that he drove us to school yesterday and got donuts this morning?"

I raised my eyebrows, surprised he had noticed that much about my dad.

Instead of answering, I pulled over to the side of the road. Seth stiffened almost immediately, and I noticed that his hand twitched towards the door handle. I felt anger bubble up in me at his obvious distrust of me but stifled it, instead leaning back in my seat and started explaining the system I had set up.

It was pretty ingenious of me, I'll admit, my having come up with the idea of putting in a button system on the dashboard that controlled the gas, break, etc. As I explained to him how it worked, I found my earlier anger vanishing, replaced by something I wasn't quite sure of. Enjoyment, maybe? In any event, Seth seemed to be listening intently, his brow furrowed as he leaned back in his seat, his posture gradually relaxed. After I had finished with my explanation, he began to ask questions like how I had the idea in the first place. I told him, feeling my entire body just settle down, relaxing as my imprint began to feel more comfortable. Maybe this was why I was always so tense; I sort of reflected my imprints mood.

But if that was the case then why was I so horny all the time? Could Seth really want me too but he just didn't know it?

I kept my mind off of all the possibilities, knowing that it would just make me horny again, and concentrated on answering whatever Seth wanted to know about cars. Surprisingly, he seemed to want to know a lot, just kept me talking which I thoroughly enjoyed. After I had answered all his questions, I pulled back into the deserted road, feeling a little bit more hopeful about today's outcome.

As we drove, Seth was quiet again, looking out the window as his posture became gradually more tense.

"What are we doing?" he asked again, still refusing to look at me.

I didn't answer, only went onto one of the dirt roads that led off the main highway, heading towards the seashore.

"I ask again, what are we doing?" Seth gritted out, his voice angry, though I noted some fear lining it.

I still said nothing, merely pulled to the side of the road on the border of the trees where the forest ended.

No matter how many times I saw it, the cliffs always stole my breath, the sheer beauty and power that emanated from the sea, the soft sand on the cliff tops, the wind that always seemed to be blowing across the forest, the way the left side of the cliffs dipped down in a steady slope until it joined with the beach, making a perfect pathway to walk back up after jumping in.

"Cliff-diving?" Seth asked, looking at the cliffs with raised eyebrows.

"Yup," I said, unbuckling myself, "cliff-diving."

I watched Seth as he unbuckled himself and opened the door, the wind from the sea instantly rushing through the cab, pushing his scent towards me, surrounding me with its sweet smell. It was all I could do to keep from jumping him right then and there.

I took a deep shuddering breath and closed the door, slamming it just a little too hard, the truck giving off the sound of bending metal. I groaned mentally, knowing that I would have to bend it back by hand when it was time to go. I walked around, only to see Seth already standing at the cliff's edge, looking down. Instantly my stomach clenched, fear of all the possibilities of what could happen to Seth filing me but I took a deep breath, trying to push all my worries down with little success. I had known that this would be hard, that my instincts would rebel against putting Seth in even the least amount of danger, but I was determined to show him, and myself for that matter, that I was capable of letting him do something a little less than safe.

I walked next to him, keeping my step light so that he wouldn't notice me. He was still looking down at the waves that crashed against the side of the cliff, his eyes wide with excitement. Then he looked up from the sea, his gaze awed as he swept it across the seemingly never-ending expanse of gray sky that seemed to almost join with the water below.

"It's beautiful," he whispered.

I looked at him, my gaze trailing down his profile as my heart swelled with pleasure at my mate's happiness.

"Yes," I murmured, my gaze still on Seth, "beautiful."

He gave me a sideways glance before returning it to the sea, his body tensing up immediately. Then... he fucking _blushed_ again! His entire face was bright red with embarrassment because I had complimented him! I just couldn't stop staring at the cherry-red color that flooded his cheeks; it was too fucking sexy on him.

Then Seth began backing away, his face still red, moving slowly from the edge of the cliffs. For a minute, I hoped that he was too afraid to do it, that he was scared enough so he wouldn't jump but would be grateful that I offered. Instead, he paused, his brow furrowed in concentration as I watched him, confused. Then with a yell that sounded more like a laugh, he ran forward and threw himself off.

My wolf instantly sprang to life inside me, screaming with horror at the danger Seth was putting himself in, panicked for the life of my mate as I watched his form vanish over the edge. After a few seconds, during which I used all my control not to run to the edge and jump in after him, a sharp pain stabbed my side, and all hopes of control vanished, replaced by panic. I leapt towards the edge and looked down, fully expecting to see Seth's body splattered along the cliff-side or floating lifelessly in the water. Instead, I saw him swimming towards the shore, obviously alive and well, moving faster than any human could have.

I felt myself relax and breathed out a sigh of relief, my head aching from all the blood that had rushed to it while I had been fighting myself to keep from going after him. I also felt quite a bit more at ease, seeing that he knew what he was doing, and that there was far less chance of him dying

I waited, leaning against the truck and shuffling my feet while I waited for Seth to come back up, my arms crossed tightly across my chest to keep myself from grabbing him and taking him as far away from the cliffs as possible, away from the dangers they presented. I didn't have to wait long for Seth to come bounding up the slope at werewolf speed, his face glowing with excitement, already dry due to his body heat.

He gave me one luminous look that made my heart beat faster than should have been possible, and screamed, "That was so fucking awesome!"

Without another word, he ran towards the edge and jumped again, sending the ice racing through my spine again. It was a little easier and I was able to stay in place for a few seconds longer, but I eventually gave in and ran to the side of the cliff, fully expecting the worst to have happened.

This continued for several minutes, with Seth running back up the cliff and jumping off immediately. I probably would have stopped it after the first few jumps if not for the fact that every time he came back up his entire body was alive with happiness, a look that made all the panic and pain when he jumped totally worth it.

After maybe the twelfth jump, Seth turned to me instead of immediately jumping off again and asked if I was going to jump as well. I had told him no, cliff-diving made my head hurt or something along those lines, and he had shrugged and just went right back to jumping. The truth was, I loved cliff-diving and I loved the rush that came with it, only problem is that I would be in the water with him, and seeing Seth wet was one of my biggest turn-on's which was probably why I mostly saw myself fucking him in the shower or in the rain or in some body of water. I would have a pretty big problem if I saw him wet, specifically in the area between my legs.

Hell, my cock was way too visible when I was just a little hard, not to mention when I had a full blown boner in a pair of swim trunks that didn't do a good job of keeping my junk confined.

After that, Seth began to slow down, pausing at the top to catch his breath before just running off again, until finally, after about the thirtieth jump, he collapsed onto his back in the grass in front of my truck, gasping with exhaustion.

"That's it," he groaned, his hand on his forehead, "I'm done."

I smiled, knowing that he had enjoyed himself and that by itself was worth all the pain that came with watching him jump.

"You bet he's done," said someone, "that was the worst jumping technique I've ever seen."

Instantly I was on the defensive, running over and crouching in front of Seth who had just sat up in surprise only to see Paul grinning at the edge of the forest, shirtless as usual, his arms crossed across his chest. I felt my body relax slightly, but I was getting some of the usual tenseness I had whenever I was with the pack. It was the alpha coming to life, knowing there was a lower wolf that needed my leadership.

"What do you want?" I growled at him, furious that he had interrupted me and Seth's day together.

Paul merely yawned, moving out of the trees and strolling casually towards me as I straightened up slowly from my crouch in front of Seth.

"Well," he said lazily, running his hands over his abs slowly, almost...seductively? Was he honestly trying to seduce _my_ mate? "I heard someone scream that whatever they were doing was fucking awesome," I glanced at Seth who, thank God, didn't blush at the innuendo, "and thought I'd see if I could view some free porn. Pity that I was wrong."

He sounded like he said the last sentence to me, almost as if he were taunting my wolf, making me angry at my lack of ability to claim my mate. I felt a growl unravel in my throat but contained it, just tried to convince myself that I was just imagining things... but didn't find much success.

"Yessir," he said, smirking at me as if he knew what I was thinking, "too bad I was _wrong_."

"Maybe you just _missed_ it," I snapped before I could stop myself.

Paul glanced behind me, where Seth was, and his smirk grew.

"Who knows," he said slowly, more to Seth than to me I thought, "maybe I did."

He shrugged, acting like he didn't care even as I saw his grin grow bigger. I felt myself begin to shake with anger, the need to phase flooding my system, making me see red.

"Well, in any event," he yawned, putting his arms behind his back and stretched, making all the muscles of his torso pop and his biceps bulge, almost as if he were stupid enough to try and show off in front of _my_ mate, "Leah wanted to know what you and Seth were doing and can't refuse that girl _anything_."

I glanced at Seth, who had gotten up and stood behind me at one point, and saw his body tense, anger visible on his features. Paul merely winked, a little more saucily than I would have preferred, then strolled right over to Seth and... _pulled him into a fucking hug!_

_My_ mate was being touched by another fucking wolf! I heard someone growl, only to realize that it was me, my brain feeling fuzzy with anger as it always did when I saw someone touching Seth, like my brain had been stuffed with cotton, cutting off all rational thought. It was all I could do to rip Paul away from Seth and tear him to pieces on the spot, enjoying every minute of it.

Then, though I couldn't be sure through my anger, I thought I heard Paul whisper to Seth, who had gone rigid when Paul had wrapped his arms around him, "Payback's a bitch, submissive."

Then he pulled away, not looking at me but acting as if he knew what I was feeling, and ruffled Seth's hair in a way that was either meant to be brotherly and affectionate but just looked seductive or, if Paul wanted to lose all chance of having kids, it was seductive and he was just trying to make it look brotherly and affectionate.

I was going to fucking kill him.

Fortunately for Paul's manhood, Seth scowled at him, anger on his face, probably mad that Paul had hugged him against his will, and flipped him off. I smirked, proud of my mate but still pissed as hell at Paul for trying something with what was _mine_.

He just laughed and started to walk away, pausing at the edge of the forest and waved, saying "hope you have fun...cliff-diving." Then, with another infuriatingly seductive wink at Seth, he began to walk away, hiking up his shorts so that they clung to his ass, showing it off.

I watched him leave, my blood boiling with hatred.

"What's his problem?" Seth asked before turning to me and glancing at my face. I don't know what he saw, but it obviously scared him because he took a few steps back and said, "Or _your_ problem for that matter?"

"He touched you," I snarled, glaring back at Paul's retreating form, wishing that he was human so I could rip his throat out without having to worry about him healing.

"So what?" Seth asked, sounding annoyed that I was angry about such thing.

I felt my body tense, anger burning my insides as I turned on him, my cock suddenly jumping to life as I saw his petite body leaning against my truck, just begging for me to take him. Under normal circumstances, I might have been able to fight off the lust that came to me, but instead, I felt nothing but rage, my anger fueling my undeniable thirst for his body as I saw how his hair was still sticking up from when Paul had run his fingers along _my_ mate's scalp.

"So I'm going to murder him," I almost shouted, moving towards him as I felt my body tremble, not with the need to phase, but with the need to ravage, to rape, to _claim_.

Seth looked taken aback, fear visibly crossing his face as he began to back away, only to find that he was trapped by the hood of my truck. He froze in place, probably knowing that I would attack if he tried to go to the left or right.

I knew, on some level, what I was about to do, but I didn't give a fucking damn about it. I only knew that another wolf had touched what was mine and both he and my mate needed to learn that no one messed with the alpha's bitch. I guess partly it had to do with Paul's flirting, which was going to earn him a fucking one way ticket to castrate hall, but mostly it was when he had implied that there was no way I could have Seth, that I was too weak to take him.

Well, I was going to prove him _wrong_.

I licked my lips, my eyes running over Seth's body as he trembled with fear in front of me, terror in his face. I found my gaze drawn to the patch of skin that was exposed at his neck, the exact spot where I had bitten him earlier. The mark was gone, but the position was still fresh in my mind. Right where the shoulder met the throat. I felt my pants become tight and I reveled in it, enjoying how turned on my mate made me, even when he was terrified of me.

His fear was good; it showed him who exactly was in charge.

Part of me, the small shred of humanity that wasn't consumed by the alpha, was screaming at me to stop, that what I was doing was wrong, that I would regret it later. I ignored it, I was sick of being denied; tired of having to wait when I was an alpha, the leader of my pack. I should be setting an example, showing the rest of the people under my leadership that I was capable of taking what was mine, no matter the consequence.

The alpha knew that I was going to destroy what little trust Seth had for me, that my mate would probably hate me for the rest of his life, but the he didn't care. As far as he was concerned, all Seth was someone to fuck, someone to pleasure, someone to bear his children. The wolf loved Seth, but not as a person. In the alpha's eyes, Seth was a whore, a bitch, someone to be used and enjoyed, someone to protect and to provide comfort. His only purpose was to belong to that leader of the pack.

I felt a smirk cross my face as I moved closer, what little resolve left in me fading as Seth whimpered, his body shaking. Then I felt my smirk vanish as I felt the tremors fill the air as Seth's outline began to blur.

The kid was about to try and phase? Not if I could help it.

I allowed my lips to draw back over my teeth and growled at him, warning him not to do anything. He either was too scared to hear me or he didn't understand because the shaking just got more intense. I felt something in me snap, and Jacob Black was gone, only the enraged alpha remaining. And boy was he _pissed_.

With a roar, I closed the space between us and grabbed the front of Seth's shirt, lifting him off the ground as easily as if he were made of paper.

"Don't even think about it," I snarled in his face before pinning him to the hood of the truck, my lips on his as I enjoyed him, moaning into his mouth while my hands went from his chest to his shoulders, gripping them hard. I felt my cock swell even more in my pants, straining against the fabric as I burned with desire for Seth's hot, tight body.

I felt him struggle underneath me as he tried to yell around my mouth, his crotch rubbing into mine as he tried to escape. This only added to my arousal and I felt, my alpha gained new confidence as I ran my hands along his sides, relishing the feel of how slim he was compared to my bulk. The alpha liked how small his bitch was, it would make it more pleasurable for both of us when we fucked.

I groaned and pulled away, whispering "don't move" into his ear, the command coming out easily with the alpha in control. I saw his body freeze, his look becoming more panicked as I reached down and gripped the hem of his shirt.

"Jacob," he pleaded, his body tense beneath mine, "don't."

I glared at him, angry at my mate for even suggesting that I stop what I was doing rising to the surface.

"Why?" I growled, moving my hands from the bottom of his shirt to his hips, where I gripped them, enjoying his wince of pain, "why should I stop? I want you and I'm done waiting."

Just saying it made my entire body feel like it was on fire, finally acknowledging that I was finally going to claim my mate. I returned my hands to the hem of his shirt and pulled it over his head, revealing his lightly toned body, so soft and delicate and beautiful. Instantly, I attacked his stomach with my mouth, sucking, licking, exploring the curves that I was going to enjoy many times in the future, no matter what Seth wanted.

"Fuck," I moaned into his belly button as I rubbed my thumbs along his thighs, feeling him tremble slightly from fear like he had done yesterday morning when I had been so close to taking him. Kim had stopped me from doing what I had wanted, if only because I remembered that she had been my mate's "girlfriend" and needed to be dealt with.

I pulled away, my wolf growling with displeasure at the loss of contact with my mate's skin, but was soon pacified as I attacked Seth's lips again, enjoying how good his mouth tasted, like chocolate and apples, nearly making me shoot my load as our naked chests met. I began to kiss away from his mouth after a few minutes of heated, passionate kissing, -at least on my side, as Seth continued to resist me- my lips pressing small kisses on his cheeks and jawbone as I trailed my way down his neck until I found the spot that I wanted. I sucked eagerly on the spot that I had bitten earlier, tenderizing the flesh so that when I marked him for real while I shot my load into him, it would be easier on Seth.

Some part of me, whether it was wolf or human I couldn't tell since they had sort of mixed together in the alpha, found it slightly ironic how I was trying to make things easier for Seth when I was about to fuck him against his will.

I leaned away from him, running my eyes over his beautiful face, the wide gray eyes, the hair that was tussled and stuck out from where I had yanked and pulled on it at one point, his soft light brown skin that always tasted like chocolate, his full lips that were bruised and bleeding from when I had kissed him, and, to crown this picture of perfection, the purple bruise on his neck that marked him as mine.

"Do you have any idea," I panted as I moved my hands down to the top of his pants, making sure to run my fingers over the amazing curves his body offered that no other person could compete with, "how fucking good your skin tastes?"

I looked down, not waiting to hear Seth say anything. With one hard yank, I pulled his shorts off...and felt my heart stop.

When Seth was wearing clothes he was stunning. But when he was stark naked and pinned by my legs to the hood of my truck he was... breathtaking. There was no sight on earth that could compare to it... except the one I would have momentarily when I had him screaming underneath me as I ravaged his body again and again. I ran my eyes over him, my mouth open in awe of this temple of perfection that was mine to claim and mine alone. There wasn't a speck of hair to be seen on him, not around his crotch or his belly button. It was completely smooth, just like I had always imagined it in all the fantasy's that I was going to fulfill. His limp cock rested between his supple legs and I smirked as I realized how much bigger I was than Seth.

I licked my lips and leaned down, ready to taste him.

Suddenly, I heard a deafening crack and saw stars explode as something rammed into my chin, knocking my head back. On instinct, my hand came up and gripped whatever it was that had hit me as my world spun. I shook my head, trying to clear it of all the flashing lights and of the confusion that filled me.

What the fuck hit me?

Once my vision cleared, it was to see Seth, struggling desperately to get away from me, my hand gripping his knee. How the hell did he do that? How was it possible for him to deny my orders when no one else in the pack could? But honestly, I didn't care, all I knew was that my mate had tried to cause me pain and needed to be punished.

I growled and slid my hand down his leg as he struggle against me, my nails cutting into his skin, leaving lines of blood along his thighs that healed almost instantly. His hole wouldn't be so lucky, I promised myself as I grabbed his other leg with my left hand and forced them apart, spreading him out for my appraisal as he continued to fight uselessly against me.

I slid my hands down a few inches further and ran my fingertips over his inner thighs, on either side of his cock. Then, to my complete astonishment, Seth froze, stopped struggling and leaned his head back and moaned, deep and throaty with pleasure as his cock gave a visible twitch.

I felt my smirk grow as I realized I had found Seth's sweet spot. Now this was a stroke of luck, I now had my greatest weapon against my feisty little bitch. Leaning down until my head was in between his legs, I found two blue veins than ran along his inner thighs and vanished into his cock. I chuckled and gave one long lick to the right vein, reveling in the resulting gasp of pleasure that Seth gave off.

The part that was still stubbornly resisting the alpha knew that what I was doing to Seth was wrong, that I was using his own body against him, but I ignored it, only concentrating on how good I was making my mate feel regardless of whether or not it was against his will.

"You like that?" I growled as I pressed harder against the vein with my tongue, watching his cock slowly swell and stiffen, rising off his stomach where it had lain useless, showing how I was affecting my mate.

"Yes," I heard Seth whimper, his voice shaking with need. Then, as I nipped the vein gently with my teeth, Seth gave off a sort of mewling sound, a sort of keen, a sign of him begging me. I don't think me or my wolf had ever been more turned on as I listened to the sound of my mate asking me for more, and not just him, but his wolf calling out, calling out to his dominant, his alpha, his _master_.

Oh fuck, if this was a dream I was going to murder someone.

I took my left hand and rubbed the other vein as my tongue continued to attack the right one, making sure that when my tongue wasn't pressing down on one vein my fingertips were massaging the other. I kept this up as Seth tossed and turned beneath me, completely silent but still held tightly in the throes of passion until his cock was standing straight and proud, pointing towards the sky as a testament to my ability to pleasure my mate like no one else.

I pulled my head away, replacing my tongue with my right hand while keeping my left where it was, still alternating the vein I applied pressure to.

"Do you want me baby?" I growled down at him, a smirk appearing on my face as I pushed hard on both veins at the same time, causing Seth to gasp and throw his head back, his back arching, making his ass rise into the air. I took advantage of this, grabbing both cheeks and lifting him up until his upper thighs were resting on my shoulders, his erect cock brushing my shin as I smirked down at him.

I licked my lips, watching it twitch as I moved one hand up between our bodies, finding the sweet spot and pressing hard to reward Seth for his obedience, the other reaching around his thighs and gripping his cock hard. I looked down along Seth's body, his head and shoulders still resting against the hood or the truck, his lower body wrapped around my neck, offering his aroused sex to me. I inhaled deeply, enjoying the smell of Seth's need as I watched him whine and squirm beneath me.

"I said," I gritted out, trying to stay in control so I didn't just go ahead and begin pleasuring him like I wanted to instead of hearing him say it, "Do you want me?"

Seth whimpered, causing the head of his cock to rub against my mouth. I groaned, my cock so hard that it hurt, but held on firm to my mate's hips.

The same part that had found pointlessness in my attempt make things easier for Seth by tenderizing his neck now thought of how stupid it was that I was trying to stay in control when I had already lost it.

I shoved that thought aside easily, the animalistic instincts coming out as Seth tried to say something but groaned instead when I blew on his exposed hole. I leaned my head forward a few inches and gave a slow lick to the left sweet spot vein, the wolf growling with satisfaction as Seth cried out with pleasure, that same mewling sound he had made earlier filling my ears.

"Answer me," I snarled.

I groaned as Seth finally managed to make out a weak "yes" and pushed his cock against my mouth again.

I smirked and pressed my lips against his shaft, moaning as I let the smell of his arousal enveloped me for the first time, filling my head with its heady aroma. I felt lightheaded but at the same time I had never been more aware of my surroundings, the pounding of the surf, the rush of the wind, the creak of the truck as it groaned underneath Seth's body, the thud of his heartbeat. He smelt sweet and distinctly feminine, like...I couldn't even begin to describe how amazing it was.

I felt my own heart pick up speed as I finally gave in and took all of him into my mouth.

Oh.

Fucking.

Shit.

Seth's cock, hard, soft and warm all at the same time, tasted like... like nothing else I had ever had. It didn't have the chocolaty taste that his skin and mouth had. No, this was a raw and animalistic flavor, full of passion and lust, a taste that went straight to my cock and made my wolf howl with need. I loved how he fit perfectly in my mouth, just barely reaching the back of my throat while slim enough to give me lots of space for run my tongue over him.

I would have been content to just hold his cock in my mouth forever, enjoying all the amazing sensations, but my mate needed to be pleasured. And pleasure him I did. I moved my mouth up before pushing it back down until his cock was re-submerged, my tongue running along his cum tube the whole way as I sucked hard on him.

I reached up with the hand that wasn't still massaging his sweet spot and gripped him hard before pulling him out of my mouth. I saw Seth whimper, silently begging me to put his cock back in my mouth, and gave it a few pumps, earning me a few wanton moans.

I couldn't help but smirk as I saw a stream of pre-cum spilling out of the tip of his cock, showing me my mate's arousal if his whimpers and body spasms hadn't. I gave it a long lick, relishing the agonized gasp that ripped through Seth's body as I gripped his ass with the hand that held him up, the thumb still applying pressure to his sweet spot while the other fingers gripped his ass-cheek.

"God, you're so fucking sexy," I moaned as I moved my head down and sucked one of his balls into my mouth, my tongue pressing hard against it.

"More, Jake," panted Seth, shaking with his need for release.

I would have preferred it to last longer, after all this was my first time to give Seth a blow job, but I couldn't deny my mate, especially when he begged like this. The alpha growled, longing to continue to torture my bitch, but when Seth looked into my eyes, his expression filled with pleading, I relented. After all, my submissive needed to be rewarded.

I lifted his legs off my shoulders, my hands supporting his ass as I lowered him gently back onto the hood of the truck before kneeling down, my body large enough so that I still looked down on his aroused cock as it sat between his legs. I leaned down and ran my tongue across the head, smirking as I heard Seth groan with need. I took him back into my mouth, enjoying the taste and smell of his arousal once more as I moved roughly, my teeth scrapping the sensitive flesh of his shaft.

Seth began to whimper, his body shaking as his orgasm approached. He reached down and gripped my hair, pulling on it as he continued to writhe with pleasure.

"Jake," he gasped, his eyes wide, "I think...I-I think I'm c-cum-"

If I woke up now I was seriously going to destroy the house.

But this dream didn't end with my mate about to shoot his load like it always did, meaning that this was really happening, I was really sucking Seth's dick. The knowledge filled me, making my head feel light with ecstasy and I felt my wolf roar with approval, ordering me to end my mate's torture. I growled, sucking on him hard as I pressed both fingers onto the veins, making sure that Seth would be assaulted by vibrations, tightness, and raw pleasure when he came.

I must have succeeded because, with a final gasp of "cumming" Seth threw his head back and screamed, pulled roughly on my hair in the process, the sound echoing across the cliff tops as he came into my mouth, filling it with his release.

I'm not even going to begin to describe how amazing Seth's cum tasted, it would take way too long to describe how delicious it was and how I wanted to enjoy it every day for the rest of my fucking life. Instead, I'll just say that I had never tasted anything sweeter.

I pulled away, my wolf practically foaming at the mouth with lust for his mate's body. It was time to finish this torturous waiting; it was time to claim Seth as mine. I stood up from where I had been crouching between Seth's legs and spread them apart even more, revealing his puckered hole. I wanted the taste his tightness, maybe even loosen him up a little with my fingers, but the alpha was officially ready to take what was his.

Seth was panting, his body covered in a sheen of sweet, the smell of his arousal still thick in the air as he closed his eyes, his face and body relaxed as I leaned over him, my hands on either side of his head, my feet planted firmly apart at the front of my car, standing right between Seth's spread legs.

I gazed down at him for a few seconds, wondering at what I had done to deserve such perfection. I leaned down and pressed my lips to his cheek as I reached down and pulled down my pants, letting them drop around my ankle before I stepped out of them and kicked them aside.

"I love you, Seth," I whispered, reaching down and running my hand over his hole, enjoying the little shiver he gave off, his eyes still shut. I then gripped my cock, smirking as I felt its length and thickness, acknowledging that this would be extremely painful for Seth.

Good, he deserved to be punished for making _us_ wait.

I leaned away from him and gripped his ankles, lifting his ass into the air until his hole was level with the tip of my throbbing and erect cock.

I closed my eyes, and leaned my head back, ready to sink my cock into him, knowing that it was going to be rough and deep like it was meant to be, like the animals we were. I pulled my hips back and couldn't help but smile as I heard Seth whimper slightly.

Seth was mine.

Then, so quiet I barely heard it over the wind and the thud of my own lust-filled heart, I heard Seth whisper, "Jacob, _please_."

It wasn't him begging me for more; it wasn't him asking me to take him. It was Seth asking me to stop what I was doing.

Then I realized just what I was about to do.

My heart sank in my chest and my eyes flew open to see Seth looking at me, no amount of lust or need in his eyes. Rather, they were pleading, begging me not to rape him. Oh God, what had I done?

I dropped his legs and backed away, my heart sinking when I saw Seth looking at me, not having moved from where he laid spread out, terror and fear in his gray eyes. I kept moving backwards, unable to look anywhere else but his eyes, guilt and self-loathing crashing over me, my own eyes beginning to sting with tears.

"Seth," I croaked, the tears starting to spill over and race down my cheeks, a sharp pain going through my chest as I saw his body stiffen, his look terrified, "I'm s-so..."

I couldn't finish it, there was just too much agony going on in my mind, filling me to the core with a sheer hatred for my actions, screaming at myself that I should have stopped.

_No,_ the wolf snarled, furious at the loss of Seth's skin, raging in my head at how close I had been to making Seth mine and had stopped right at the brink of the ultimate mating, _you shouldn't have, he's yours, he should be _begging_ you to make love to him._

_That's the point,_ I thought back, my sight blurring with more tears, _what I was going to do wasn't making love...it was rape_.

_SO?_ The wolf screamed in reply, _what does it matter what it was? Seth is _your_ submissive and as such he should be willing to do whatever you want, not act like a selfish little _bitch_ and fight you off!_

_But I love him,_ I thought as I continued to back away, _I love him enough to let him choose me._

I felt the wolf growl and my gaze was dragged away from Seth's eyes against my will, raking down his slim body until it stopped at the two bluish veins that were still visible between his legs.

_Just rub them while you fuck him,_ the alpha ordered, his voice low and dark, _he'll enjoy every minute of it._ _He_ can't _deny his destiny._

I felt my cock twitch slightly as the alpha forced image after image into my head, each one derived from all my fantasies over the last month, the bed, the forest, the leather, the shower, every single one of them amplified by the knowledge that I could make all of the come true if I just grew a pair, forced Seth down, and took him like I was meant to, like I had always imagined it. Rough.

_Just rub them,_ the wolf snarled in my mind, _and claim your mate._

I stopped walking backwards, my need for Seth burning inside of me as a new image appeared, a replay of seeing Seth moan and pant underneath me as I sucked him. Despite the knowledge of nearly having raped him, I still wanted him. I had only been able to get a few steps away and I took one step forward against my will.

Seth looked me in the eye, his gaze piercing like it always was.

"Remember what Jay said," he growled at me, trying to hide his fear with defiance but I could still see the shaking of terror underneath his mask of rebellion.

That stopped me. The memory of Jay was etched in my mind, his blue eyes burning into mine as he told me, his voice calm and collected, "If you rape him in the middle of the forest, he'll hate you for the rest of eternity."

I felt the pain in my chest magnify as I realized that what Jay had said was true, I would lose all chance of him becoming mine if I raped him. I had probably just lost all of his trust because of what I had done, if I had any to begin with.

Turning around so that my back was facing Seth I whispered, not sure if he could even hear me, "I'm sorry."

I felt my heart break into a million pieces as I began to run away from him, towards the woods, my body shaking with sobs as I began to phase. So the wolf would leave me alone for a little while, so that I could just run and forget that I had almost taken my mate against his will. What I had done was unforgivable, just cementing the fact that I was a bastard who didn't deserve Seth's love or even the privilege of having imprinted on him.

I felt my wolf howl in agony as I phased, the pain of what I had done enveloping me as I ran into the woods, not caring where I went even as I crashed into trees, tears still careening out of my eyes.

I didn't care as I felt thorns slash into me, barely noticed as branches whacked into my face and body, sending torrents of physical pain in with the continually growing ache in my heart as my mind played over what I had done, saw what a monster I was not to see what I was doing to my imprint.

I loved Seth but had still hurt him because of my lack of control and for that I deserved to suffer. Suffer by running away from the best thing that had ever happened to me. From the thing that I had almost destroyed because of my selfishness.

I didn't deserve him.


	15. Chapter 15 Two Views

Twilight and all its characters were created by Stephenie Meyer I do not own or benefit from any of them

**Chapter 15: Two views**

**Seth's POV**

I just stood beside the truck trying to remember how to breathe; "What the fuck did just happen? How did I let that moronic pervert touch me like that?" I tried to remember what just happened but at that moment my mind was in a daze. As a light breeze touched my overheated body I was reminded of the fact that I was naked. I looked around for my bathing suit, finding it not far from where I stood. As I was putting my bathing suit on that's when it hit me, I came one heartbeat away from being raped by the only person in the world I truly despised.

This was royally fucked up, it wasn't enough losing my parents, turning into a wolf; but not a tough strong wolf, nooooo, I had a female wolf inside me making me indeed a freak among freaks. Being told I'm a submissive, a word that I absolutely loathe. I may be many things, but submissive is not one of them. This, in addition of having an overbearing, possessive, hormonal wolf imprinting on me making my life a living hell. Instead of looking forward to my sixteenth birthday like any teenager I only wished that time stood still and that day will never come, the day when Jacob Black will… claim me. Images of the huge Metal Worker's bed with his stench all over it came to my mind. The box of "extra large" condoms in the drawer telling me that all I had to look forward to for the rest of my life was a butt-load of pain, literally.

I snapped out of my musings when I realized I was standing on the edge of the cliff. As I looked down I debated whether to jump toward the rocks below, thinking if I could die before my enhanced healing repaired the damage. My legs felt weak, I sat down on the hard ground and wept bitterly as all the despair that consumed my soul came to the surface. I hate myself, I hate my life, I hate my future but especially, I hate Jacob. Because of his imprinting my life has been turned upside down. I thought imprinting was supposed to bring two soul mates together, completing each other, living for each other. Apparently Mother Nature or the Quileute magic messed up big time, first making me a freak and second giving me the most fucked up imprinting in the history of the world.

As I continued with my pity party I remembered clearly what happened after Paul left. Jacob was furious at Paul for touching me, what I didn't understand was that if it was not my fault why did he want to punish me? I was so afraid since I didn't know if he was going to hit me, rape me or kill me; thank goodness he didn't kill me but the alternative was not that good either. Jacob pinned me against the hood of the truck violating my mouth until my lips bled. Nothing new there, the difference is that this time he took it far, too far. He took my clothes off, oh shit …

Jacob saw me naked! My whole body started shaking as I came into that realization. I know that if before he saw my body he wanted to fuck me every chance he got; now it was going to be so much worse.

I remembered the look of undeniable lust in his black eyes, he licked his lips like a predator that sees its prey and savors in the moment before the kill. He explored my whole body using his hands and mouth, inhaling the scent of my arousal as my body responded to his ministrations. I moaned like a whore when he took me in his mouth while touching my thighs.

A new feeling assaulted me, shame. How the hell was he able to make me feel the way he did? I was ashamed of how my body reacted to his kisses, his touch, his hands on my thighs, his hot able mouth sucking my…oh shit.

I wonder what he thought of me. Did he find me adequate? What the hell, Seth, you are more messed up than you thought. Now I have to add crazy to the rest of my demons as I keep talking to myself

"Damn it, get a grip. Yes, it felt good, but it was wrong and against your will, don't you see that?"

_It felt good because he is your mate, your dominant, the one nature chose for you. Your life would be so much easier if you accepted your fate and submitted. You are like two pieces of a perfect puzzle, there is only one fit and it is you and him together._

"So now you decide to show up, where were you when I needed your help, bitch?

"_There is no need for name calling, by the way if I'm a bitch and I'm part of you, what does that make you? _

Just shut up!

"_Why are you so afraid of my words? You know I speak the truth and your own body confirmed it"_

What are you talking about? I asked genuinely curious now_._

_"Jacob found your sweet spot and just his touch sent you into a world of ecstasy, the sweet spot reacts the strongest to the touch of your one true mate"._

This can't be true, I never liked guys and I most definitely don't like Jacob, he is a jerk and I hate him with every fiber of my being. I mentally screamed.

_"If you are so sure about this, why are you so confused right now, you have so many different feelings inside you that it is hard to distinguish one from the other. The most prevalent are fear, shame, anger and another one that I'm not going to say because you have to find and understand that one on your own." _

Big help you are, why don't you just shut up and leave me alone, this is the second time I ask this of you, please. I pleaded.

I felt relieved when she became silent, respecting my wishes, I know she has helped me in the past but right now I need to be by myself, alone with my thoughts and feelings.

I look around and notice that I have no idea where I am. Jacob chose the most secluded spot to cliff dive he could find, so nobody will hear me scream as he raped me. That was probably the plan all along, get me tired with the cliff diving so I wouldn't put up too much of a fight, not that he needed any help, he could overtake me easily. Then fuck me until I couldn't walk. Yep, seems easy enough, even his tiny monkey brain could come up with this plan.

How am I going to get home? I remembered Paul, I cannot be that far from the Rez if he was able to find us. I walked through the woods following Paul's scent. After walking for two hours I end up in my backyard. I run inside and upstairs not answering Emily's questions, acknowledging Leah's gaze or Paul's smirk. I run directly to the bathroom locking the door behind me. Running the shower as hot as possible I step in and scrub my skin until it hurts. I felt dirty, ashamed and lonely.

**Jacob's POV**

I ran, and ran, and ran, phasing back to human form once I was a safe distance from Seth. I didn't want anyone in my head; damn it I didn't want to be in my head. I needed to calm down before I phased again so I could hide my thoughts. Right know my emotions where too rampant and I wouldn't be able to prevent the pack from witnessing everything that happened between Seth and me, I just hope nobody saw anything during my lapse in judgment.

_And me, I was there too, witnessing what an idiot you are. He was right there, exposed, willing, ready, begging to be taken and you did nothing. You backed away and ran like a fucking pussy, you're pathetic. _

"Shut the fuck up! Because of you I'm going through this, it's your fault."

_Jacob I'm the alpha wolf, nothing more nothing less, apparently YOU are not man enough to handle me._

"Go to hell and leave me alone".

I was grateful as the wolf went silent, I couldn't deal with him anymore and there was enough in my head already. As I went over everything that happened today my chest felt tight as the thought of Seth came to my head. Last night he comforted me, yes out of pity, but he did it. He seemed to relax in my company for the first time since imprinting on him but everything went to shit town as soon as Paul showed up. I felt a growl escape my chest at the mention of his name; he will have to pay for this.

The look of fear in his face will forever haunt me; I could see the terror in his eyes as I approached him. I don't understand why I felt I needed to punish him; he didn't do anything wrong except allow Paul to hug him which was inexcusable but unavoidable since he did not initiate the hug. Maybe I'm just looking for excuses, maybe I knew all along that the day will end like this, Paul's interruption just gave me an excuse. A small part of me kept telling me to stop but I chose to ignore it.

My Seth, his gorgeous face with his wide gray eyes, those eyes that I dream one day will look lovingly at me. His body is so delicate, his light brown skin as soft as silk over his lightly toned muscles. Just his scent makes me so painfully hard, making it very difficult to stay in control. Shit his whole body tasted like the best chocolate ever.

Seth asked me to stop, he begged, but that only managed to anger me more, how he dared tell me what to do, he is mine and he has to accept that. If he just submitted everything will be so much easier, but I don't think that will ever happen.

We are not supposed to hurt our imprints and that's all I do. I really enjoyed his pain and the fear I inflicted on him today. I am truly a monster.

Blame does not fall solely on Paul or even the wolf; I lost it, I messed up as the biggest mother fucking idiot ever born. To some extent I knew what I was doing, I just didn't care. At that moment Seth was nothing more than a piece of meat, an ass to fuck until it bled, and the alpha's bitch. Paul made me angry, jealous and I took it out on Seth.

Unaware of how much time passed since almost claiming Seth and running away, I sat down. My head felt heavy, my chest tight and my whole body hurt, in part from the workout I did the day before and another part because I missed Seth. The distance from my imprint was painful and the worst part was that I was sure that being as far as possible from me was exactly what Seth wanted.

I took a look around at the unfamiliar area and tried to become aware of any threats. I took a deep breath as even in my human form this sense was heightened, there were no traces of the sickly sweet smell that I so desperately despise.

This forest is completely unfamiliar; the tree cover is very thick in a way that is very hard for any light to get through. I felt very connected to this dark dismal forest; it felt like it could choke the life out of me, I should be that lucky. The areas around La Push are bursting with life; this forest in comparison seems devoid of life or the energy necessary to sustain any kind of life. Several dark green leaves spiral to the ground in their sad movement through the air they announce that soon they will reach their final resting place. The earth beneath my feet feels damp and cold; I can only compare it to what I think a grave must feel like. The sounds are very different too, the chirping of the crickets sounds more like a lament, not the cheery chirping that I'm used to.

Feeling more in control I phase and suddenly the forest becomes quieter, the small critters becoming silent as they sense the presence of a dangerous predator. I start running through this dark forest which is no problem since my eyesight adjusts perfectly to the level of light. Not caring about the branches hitting my face or scratching my sides I weaved clumsily through the trees. I broke free of the dense forest and came to a less dense area that allowed me to see that the sun was probably setting. I stopped to sniff the air and confirm that there were no humans around that could see me.

Seth came to my mind again, I left him all alone. How is he supposed to get back? I'm a lousy imprinter, his safety should come first, and I should've made sure he was safe before I ran. But the reason I ran was to keep him safe, to protect him from a monster…me. In an instant I was transformed into a monster that wanted nothing else but to ravage his young body in the most demeaning way. These thoughts are tormenting me as I remember I'm in wolf form and any member of the pack could be listening, I check and feel relieved that nobody seems to be listening. But, why isn't anybody on patrol? Where are they? Did something happen to Seth? Maybe they went out looking for him when he didn't come home. It's been several hours, is he lost or worse, no, no, no, he is fine; my Seth has to be ok. Please God let him be ok; he is my life, my everything.

"Man please stop with the drama, you sound like a fucking soap opera "Jared's voice blasted in my head.

"Where were you? Why wasn't anybody on patrol? I snapped at him.

"We just started the shift; you probably caught us while we changing shifts". I noticed hesitation in his thoughts.

"Is Seth ok?" I asked concern evident in my thoughts, while trying to conceal everything that happened this afternoon.

"I think he is kind of ok, he got home a few hours ago, locked himself in the bathroom for an hour". A voice I recognized as Paul started to explain, a pang of pain and guilt made my whole form shake as I fell to the floor. Then I realized who just spoke, Paul.

"Paul, before I forget, be warned that when I get back you will pay for what you did today"

"Jake...man ...I..."

"Shut up! I'll deal with you later, now I just want to hear about Seth, keep talking". He hesitated for a minute, but went on.

"Both Leah and Emily tried to get him to unlock the door. Leah threatened to beat him up, while Emily was a lot more motherly and understanding, trying to persuade him to open the door but with no success. Sam pretty much ordered him to open the door saying that if he didn't he will let you have your way with him" I noticed that both Paul and Jared mentally snickered at that statement.

"What happened then?" I asked getting impatient as the information was not coming fast enough, it hurt to hear what my poor Seth was going through but I needed to know.

"Sam dragged him out of the bathroom towards his room, from a distance I could see that his skin was very red like he used very hot water or scrubbed too harshly", stated Paul with a hint of concern in his voice, he didn't get along with Seth and teased him constantly but he was a pack brother nonetheless.

"Oh" was all I could muster as the pain in my chest became so unbearable that it was difficult to breathe.

"Anything else?"

"Well yes Jared got to second base with Kim, woohoo!" joked Paul

"About Seth, you idiot, I don't fucking care about Jared's sex life!" I screamed at him.

"Not much, Sam locked both him and Seth in the bedroom and all I could hear was Seth crying hysterically not making much sense of anything as his words were more like sobs" stated Paul more serious now.

"Dear God, my baby is hurting and I'm…" I stopped myself before I gave anything away.

"You're what Jake?" asked Jared "By the way, where are you man?"

"It doesn't matter where I am, one of you go get Sam. Tell him I need to talk to him and that it's urgent" I told the increasingly suspicious wolves.

"Sure Jake, are you ok? Asked now Paul.

"Stop asking questions and do as I told you damn it!" I yelled at the pair that was quickly getting on my already fried nerves.

I felt exhausted like all the life had been sucked out of me. I hurt my imprint, somewhat unintentionally but it still happened. I couldn't describe the pain I was feeling because of this. My beautiful mate, I needed him, I needed to protect him, to love him, to help him understand what happened this afternoon. I know I was wrong, the jealousy and the lust got the best of me. I couldn't help it, I lost all control and he paid the consequences. How many times in our life was this going to happen? Me, losing control and he paying for it. Will he be like Emily, bearing the mark of the unstable mate that claimed to love her but marked her for the rest of her life?

I stood up, tossed back my head and let out a howl that pierced the silence around me. As I crumbled into the ground I lose awareness of my surroundings, I couldn't see, hear or smell anything. I know this is dangerous and leaves me an easy target but I don't care. I will welcome death right now, a quick way out of this world in which my life is nothing but misery of my own doing.

All I could feel was despair consuming me as I descended into the pits of hell.

I had to shake those thoughts out of my head because I knew that because of the imprint to some extent Seth could be affected if something happened to me. I needed to live, if just to make it up to him, to help him forget all the pain I caused him. If he would let me I could make him so happy, I adore him and I would dedicate my life to making sure he was happy and well taken care of. Then it dawned on me, what I needed to do to make it up to him, everything else failed making us both miserable. At least this way he will be happy a little bit longer, as I was sure that my return will bring him nothing but grief.

I need to stay away from him, as much as it hurts me; as much as I worry he is not safe in my arms. If we ever are to have a future together I need to be strong, for him, for me, for our children. I'll stay away from the Reservation for a while, work on my self-control. This will be my detox as Seth is my drug; I'm addicted to him, to his scent, to his body, to his lips, those plump lips made just to be kissed by me… STOP! There I go again. If I don't control my desire, my lust, I'll never earn Seth's trust, I'll never be worthy of him.

I will return eventually since I can't stay away from him permanently; it could kill me. I will wait until his birthday; my wolf will demand to be appeased that day. I have no choice but to listen to my wolf as he is a big part of me now. But I can learn to manage him, to control my impulses so he doesn't dominate me. I will never lose myself to the wolf, this has happened too many times and each time ended in Seth getting hurt and he doesn't deserve this. Yes, he is defiant but that's part of what I like about him, he keeps me on my toes, he is what I need in every possible way.

**Seth's POV**

The sound of a howl woke me up, I looked at the clock on the bedside table and it read ten pm, it was not that late but I went to bed early on the account that I was exhausted. After all he crying and talking to Sam telling him everything that happened I fell asleep. Sam was very understanding but what really pissed me off was that Sam understood him too. I'll never understand these alpha wolves with their uncontrollable desires or just plain mean.

I rubbed the sleep off my eyes and the sting reminded me of all the crying I did earlier in the evening. Surprisingly, they still felt swollen, they usually heal in minutes. I heard a second howl, this made me get out of bed, but I was moving slowly. There was no rush as it was probably the almighty alpha calling a meeting after coming back from wherever he ran to... that piece of shit. Trust me, Jacob was the last person I wanted to see, I can already feel disgust creeping into my throat as I think about his lustful stares.

I stopped for a minute when it hit me, it couldn't be him, because if he was back he would be here pestering me, or worse, finishing what he started. There must be something important going on if the pack is being called. Since Jake is not here to forbid me to go I jump out of my window phasing as soon as I was a safe distance into the woods. Making use of the speed that I haven't been allowed to experiment with, I ran following the pack's scent. I got to the clearing at the same time as Embry and Quil, only Jared was missing because he was still running patrol, he will still hear everything through our mental link. Sam stood in the center, his imposing black form demanding attention and respect. He should have remained alpha instead of dick face Black taking over.

"Jake contacted me earlier this evening, he will be away for a while" started Sam while giving me a sympathetic look.

"Until he comes back I'll be in charge of the pack with Jared as my beta".

"Where is he?" inquired Embry.

"I don't know, he won't say" answered Sam.

"Maybe he decided this was a good time for a little vacation" added Paul with a side glance towards me.

"Don't be stupid Paul, he is not on vacation, he just needs some time to … sort out some stuff" growled Sam obviously annoyed.

"When is he coming back?" Asked Leah with a suspicious tone in her thoughts.

"Hopefully never" I said and immediately I felt five pairs of eyes on me, but I didn't care, I was so happy he was going to stay away even if it was just for one week; shit, the idea of even one day without that overbearing oaf all over me was bliss. I felt so ecstatic I was doing back flips in my head.

"Don't say that Seth!" yelled Sam "Don't disrespect your alpha".

"Give me a fucking break, are you for real? Excuse me for not breaking down in sobs because that bastard is not going to be around" I was livid, my own brother was giving me shit about the way I felt about Jacob, even after I told him what happened earlier today. I thought that after I told him what the "alpha" did to me he wouldn't be so fond of our pack leader, but apparently not.

I hated Jacob Black and I wanted him to disappear, to go as far as his legs will take him and stay there or even better, he should do the world a favor and die. As these thoughts crossed my mind I felt a sharp pain on my chest _What was that_? I thought as the pain started to fade away as fast as it came.

I realized everybody's eyes were still on me. "Don't you dare fucking judge me, this is the best news I heard in a long time" I spat at them.

"Is that all? I'll like to go to bed, I have school tomorrow". I heard a growl coming from Sam as he gave me a murderous look. I felt guilty for what Emily will have to go through when Sam got home, probably another round of "angry sex" but I shouldn't worry about her, she likes it.

As I ran back toward my house I was almost giddy, tomorrow morning I will wake up and there will not be any arms holding me tightly choking the joy out of my existence. I am going to be able to go to school without fear of being raped in the middle of the hallway. Tomorrow is going to be a good day, it's amazing that Jacob decides to stay away and my life immediately is better. I get home and fall asleep feeling happy, everything is perfect except for a nagging feeling in my chest.

The next day I get up feeling light and happy, I still expected to find the pervert on my bed but he was nowhere to be found. I start singing in the shower but get annoyed at myself when I realize it was the song I listened to in Jacob's truck on our way to the cliffs. I finish and dry myself quickly tying the towel around my waist. I peek out of the bathroom door expecting to find Jacob standing there but he wasn't. There is no overgrown freak staring lustfully at me. There is nobody pinning me to the wall and kissing me against my will.

"Yep this is going to be a good day".

I hear Sam's voice, "Seth, get down here, you are going to be late"

What is he talking about? I still have forty five minutes before school starts, since I had no interruptions today I was able to get done with my morning routine rather quickly.

As I sat down for breakfast I noticed nobody shared my cheery mood. Emily was uncharacteristically quiet, actually I was surprised she was standing and walking around after all the grunts of "So fucking tight..." and "harder, Sam, harder" that woke me up for a few minutes in the middle of the night. I may need some therapy when I get older because I don't know how much of this oversexed crazy wolf lifestyle I can handle.

Leah didn't lift her eyes from her breakfast and Sam looked very tired. Maybe he is not happy with the idea of being alpha again or maybe its just lack of sleep. Emily placed in front of me a plate filled with blueberry pancakes which I drowned in syrup before I started eating them. It was not surprising that I was so hungry; after all I didn't have lunch or dinner yesterday. Leah finished her breakfast, stood up, rinsed her plate and left the kitchen without even a glance in my direction. I don't know what her problem is and I really don't care, I have enough problems, to care about her bitchiness. After a few minutes Emily left the kitchen leaving just Sam and me there.

"Seth, can we talk for a minute" asked Sam

"Of course; what about? I asked even though I knew very well what the answer was.

"Don't play dumb Seth, you know very well what I'm talking about. About everything that happened yesterday between you and Jacob"

"What did he tell you? I guess he told you his very twisted side of the story, since you were defending him so much when we met with the pack". I spat at him, anger and disgust filling my mind.

"He didn't tell me anything but I could feel the despair in his thoughts, as if they were my own. He was able to hide what happened but the feelings were too overwhelming to hide. Seth I've been there, remember? I have felt the guilt and disgust at my own actions consuming my every thought. And the worst part is that you know there is not much you can do to avoid making the same mistake again", said Sam almost in a whisper.

"He is in pain Seth, both physically and emotionally. I can tell you from experience how much it hurts to be away from your imprint, especially if that distance is caused by your imprint rejecting you" added Sam.

"Are you shitting me? Now I'm supposed to feel guilty because an overly hormonal bastard with no self control is hurting. What do you want me to do run to his side with open arms and tell him I forgive him for everything? Then get on all fours and beg him to fuck me so he can appease his wolf" I said my voice getting louder with every word and the tears I didn't notice forming in my eyes rolling down my cheeks.

"I will not feel bad for him, I'm glad he is hurting. He treated me like a whore; I don't know how he did it but managed to turn my own body against me. He has made my life unbearable and yesterday was just one more episode in this whole fucked up situation!" I was yelling now.

"Jacob did things to me against my will, I did not want this. I don't want him touching me ever again. I can't explain it, just by touching my inner thighs he ..." I couldn't go on as the embarrassment made my face burn and the memory of the pleasure I felt made my pants feel tight.

"He found your sweet spot" Said Sam so quietly that if not for my enhanced hearing I would've missed it.

I remembered the conversation with my wolf yesterday, she mentioned the same thing but I was too distracted to even ask what it was.

"What is the sweet spot, Sam?"

Sam paused for a moment before answering. "You see, every shape shifter has one or more veins in any part of their bodies called the sweet spot. When rubbed it gives the person an immense wave of pleasure and is especially sensitive to the touch of your mate".

"Jacob found yours and used it to give you pleasure" stated Sam.

"No, he used it to manipulate me, to make me weak".

"I didn't want him to give me pleasure, fuck I didn't want him to touch me!" My words came out as sobs that I couldn't control no matter how hard I tried.

"Damn it Seth, don't you see? Are you so blinded by all the hate in your heart that you cannot see what its right in front of you?"

"He gave you pleasure, he though of your needs. He could've just taken you right there without any concern about your pleasure or pain."

"Sam, I begged him to stop and all he did was order me to not move. He took my will away; he abused his power as alpha to satisfy his needs."

"He didn't force himself inside you like I know he wanted. It must have taken a lot of strength to do what he did, to stop and think about your imprint's needs when the wolf is screaming in your head to take what's yours. He left before he could hurt you, going against your wolf's wishes is extremely hard, very few men can do it, I know I couldn't". Stated Sam his face falling as shame overwhelmed him.

"But I'm not his and I'll never be" I screeched.

"Yes you are Seth; you are his imprint, his soul mate. I don't know how he did it but I'm grateful because it would've pissed me off tremendously if he took you before your birthday. His cravings and desires must be driving him crazy. He is in all his right to claim you and he not only agreed to wait but had the opportunity to have you fully and he didn't. Jacob has been very considerate and you have to see that."

"Considerate ... his right... what side are you on Sam? I'm your brother!" I whispered as my anger was substituted with deep sadness.

'He is also my brother Seth". Answered Sam sadly.

"But I'm your blood and blood is always ticker than water, brother". I said the last word acidly through clenched teeth.

"Seth, please, listen to me" said Sam as I attempted to stand up. "His wolf must be torturing him right now demanding that he come and finish what he started, the wolf is animalistic and dominating. He will twist reality and life according to his needs. The wolf is selfish and only lives for his own gratification; whether it is to kill what it senses as dangerous or to claim what he feels belongs to him."

"But we are not animals Sam and we shouldn't act like we are"

I stood up from the table with a new feeling creeping up in my chest adding itself to the list of fucked up feelings I have, betrayal. My own brother has betrayed me, first agreeing to let Jacob claim me on my sixteenth birthday. And now defending him after everything Jacob has done to me. Just because Sam experienced something similar and committed a horrible crime he cannot justify or even applaud Jacob's actions.

Sam is so proud of his alpha, it makes me sick. They should both burn in hell as the sadistic monsters they are. My thoughts are filled with rage and pain more than actual hate, at least towards Sam.

I am still a kid; there is so much I want to do. I want to graduate high school, go to prom with a pretty girl, dance all night and as the night ends realize how one chapter of my life has ended but another one is about to start. I want to go to college, live somewhere other than the Rez for the first time, go to parties and get drunk until I end up worshipping the porcelain god. Loose my virginity to a woman and in my own terms. Meet the love of my life, fall in love and get married.

But no, none of this is going to happen they have taken my choices away. They have chained my hopes and dreams, and all I have to look forward to is a life of regret and pain. Sounds like fun doesn't it?

"Seth, Seth" Sam's voice took me away from my thoughts. "This conversation is not over".

"To me it is" I answered and noticed that I was unconsciously walking away from the table.

"Sam you don't care about me, nobody does. Mom and dad would be so disappointed on what you have become". I know this was a low blow but it was how I felt and if nobody cared about my pain, why should I care about theirs?

Sam stood up from the table and walked towards me, I was sure he was going to slap me but he surprised me by putting his arms around me in a tight hug. This caught me by surprise since Sam is never expressive with Leah or me; he only is affectionate to Emily.

I sobbed against his chest staining his shirt with the tears that flowed freely from my eyes. My breathing was nothing more than sobs that reflected the anger and pain I felt.

"Seth I love you, please don't ever doubt that. You are my little brother and I will always be on your side. Shit, you are more than my brother you are my first son, it's been my privilege to raise you after mom and dad left this earth. You and your sister are my responsibility but I love it and I wouldn't have it any other way."

But it's also my responsibility to help you see when you are making a mistake."

"And what mistake am I making?" I asked in a barely audible voice

"You are closing yourself to the idea of sharing your life with Jacob. You've built a wall based on prejudices and preconceived ideas. You fail to see the reality of your situation."

"Please hear me out". Said Sam as he felt me stiffen against him.

Sam pulled back so he could look directly at my face as he continued, maybe he was hoping to see understanding in my eyes "I have to confess I was not happy when Jacob imprinted on your, especially when I began to see all the different scenarios that were playing in his head. It made me nauseous to see the lust, the raw need, to see everything he wanted to do to you."

I was very surprised by this admission because never in my wildest dreams I would've though Sam felt this way.

"But Seth, I see in his head, as his beta I'm allowed to see more than the others. He loves you, he truly does and not just because of the imprint, he was attracted to you even before you phased. He cares for you deeply and his actions reflect that. He has made mistakes, so have you, we all have, but his heart is in the right place and that is right in front of you waiting for you to accept it. You feel I defend him too much and maybe it's true, but I do it for two reasons. The first one I know how he feels, the overwhelming desire to protect and to mate. The second, because I know without a doubt, that he can make you very happy."

"But I don't want him in my life Sam".

"I know Seth, but try please, at least try". Begged Sam.

I was taken aback because never before in my life I heard my bother beg for anything. It truly shocked me to hear him begging me to give Jacob a chance. Sam must truly believe in this imprint or maybe he is just crazy.

"C'mon I'm taking you to school, get your stuff". Said Sam as he walked towards the front door. I got my backpack and followed him in silence.

The ride to school was quiet but not uncomfortable as each one of us had a lot to think about. As we got closer to the school I felt grateful that I was going to have school to help give me a break from all the overwhelming thoughts. For a few hours I will get to be just Seth Clearwater a sophomore at the La Push High School. School will give me something to occupy my mind and give me a sense of normalcy. I will concentrate on whatever the teachers are saying just so I will not think about my fucked up life.


	16. Chapter 16 School Sucks

**Twilight and all its characters belong to Stephenie Meyer, I only borrow them to please my overactive imagination**

**Chapter 16: School sucks**

**Seth's POV**

I walk into school expecting the whispers and the looks and for sure they were there, they ranged from pity to disgust. After all only two days ago I was almost sexually assaulted by Jacob in the hallway. I wonder how many of these kids saw my naked ass when he took off my pants. This thought made my face burn with the blushing I sure had.

I remembered the smell of his arousal, his weight over my body pinning me to the floor, how he told me he was going to enjoy this and I wasn't going to be able to stand afterwards. I felt shame as I remembered how I acted like a total submissive obeying his orders without questioning. I remembered the smell of my own blood mixing with the smell of his arousal. I remembered how Kim was the only one that stood up to him and without knowing it risked her life to help me.

I went to my locker to gather my things for the first two classes and caught a glimpse of Jared talking to Kim in the hallway. I sighed, thinking that could've been me, in a typical relationship with a girl. I felt the sting of jealousy watching Jared with the girl I considered my girlfriend until a few days ago. Even if she was only interested in clothes, she was my friend even standing up to Jacob to help me. That's all I wanted, a normal life, is that so much to ask?

There was one good thing though, no Jacob, which brought a smile to my face.

I went to history class and tried to concentrate on what the teacher was saying, I was self conscious since the last time I've been in that class Jacob pinned me to the door and kissed me possessively. When I entered the classroom everybody was looking at me funny, even the teacher gave me a weird look.

By now all the students in La Push, their parents, their friends and all their Facebook contacts thought I was gay, and I had no way of proving I was not. This was one of those things that will follow me for the rest of my life, another reason to hate Jacob, like I needed any more reasons.

But what bugged me the most apart from the annoying pain in my chest was that I couldn't stop thinking about Jacob. And that pissed me off.

I couldn't get that bastard out of my mind; I expected that at any moment I was going to see him standing by the door, his big muscular arms crossed over his strong chest. Wearing those shirts that are always two sizes too small, his only purpose being to show off his physique. Shit I was going to start drooling at any moment, I'm really fucked up. I shook those thoughts out off my head before I would embarrass myself by getting a hard-on in the middle of history.

The rest of my morning classes went by in a blur and it was time for lunch. I went to my usual table with the pack. Even though they made sure not to touch me since nobody wanted to loose an arm or a leg I was always welcomed, but not today. Kim was sitting in my usual spot and there where no empty spots around the table. It hurts to be rejected by those I considered my brothers, I wondered if Jacob ordered them to treat me like this, banishing me from their table to punish me for my rejection. I don't doubt it, he is capable of anything.

"Fuck you all". I mumbled as I walked to an empty table, my words laced with pain and disappointment directed towards my so called friends. I know they all heard me but nobody said anything. I ate alone since nobody dared to sit with me, for whatever the reason most of the members of the pack didn't acknowledge my presence and those who did simply ignored me. I cursed Jacob's name in my mind wishing him the worse fate possible. The pain in my chest got worse, I wondered what this was, maybe heartburn, maybe the stress I've been under gave me an ulcer. I couldn't finish my lunch and left the cafeteria feeling all eyes on me as I did.

The rest of the day passed by without me even noticing, without anybody talking to me, but everybody gossiping about my "situation". Apparently I was the flavor of the day but really, I don't give a shit. They can all ram themselves for all I care.

When the day was over I felt relief knowing that I was going home, the only place that still welcomed my presence or at least I hope so. Sam couldn't pick me up and I wouldn't dare ask any of the guys for a ride, so I started walking towards my home hoping rain would hold off until I got there, but with my luck it will probably start pouring in two seconds.

With the corner of my eye I saw Jared drive by with Kim and Paul in his car and Quil driving Embry home. My heart felt heavy with anger and resentment directed at my pack brothers.

At home I was welcomed by Emily's smile and I felt my heart soar, her bright cheerful attitude bringing relief to my raw bleeding heart. Her attitude was very different from this morning, I guess she knew Sam was going to talk to me and that conversation was going to be very hard. She reacts to Sam's feelings in a way that is really astounding, it's like they can read each other's mind and feel each other's emotions.

"How was school?" asked Emily from the kitchen counter where she was chopping some vegetables for one of her magnificent confections.

"It sucked" I say trying to hold the tears that were threatening to fall from my eyes.

Immediately she stopped what she was doing and walked to my side holding me in her delicate arms. "Don't worry Seth, it will get better"

"But Emily, nobody talked to me, the guys ignored me all day, it was like I didn't exist." I sighed

"Give them time Seth, they are confused. They don't know what happened. They only know their pack leader is missing and they assume is something related to you." Said Emily calmly.

"Sam told you what happened?" I asked horrified and embarrassed that Emily knew what transpired between Jacob and me.

"Yes Seth he had to, I insisted and remember that an imprinted wolf cannot deny the object of their affection anything." Emily now had a mischievous look on her face. "There is a lot you need to learn about being an imprinted."

"But that can wait, going back to your predicament, I'll ask Sam to talk to the guys, they cannot shun you because of what they think you did or did not."

"Emily, you know what? Don't tell him anything. This is showing me who my real friends are and apparently none of them care enough about me to even try to give me a chance." This was true, if I was going to survive this I needed tough skin, if they don't want anything to do with me fuck them, I don't need them.

"Are you sure Seth? You'll feel lonely"

"Better lonely than surrounded by a group of hypocrites" I stated in a tone so cold that I was surprised it was coming from me.

"Well I'm not going to insist, but just say the word and Sam will be all over them in a minute."

"Thank you Emily". I paused to catch my breath, "For everything". With that I went to my room feeling my legs heavy like I was trying to walk through snow.

I sat on the edge of my bed, bringing my hands to my face to wipe some of the tears I allowed to escape from my eyes. I moved to my desk and got my homework out of my backpack, thank goodness I didn't get a lot of homework today and what they gave me was rather easy. The school year was ending; we only had two more months of school. I was always excited for the end of the school year since it coincided with my birthday and I got to celebrate double.

Not this year, my sixteenth birthday was going to be the last one of this life. After that day I will be dead, the old happy Seth will be dead and in his place will be the angry, bitter Seth. The boy without a future since his life was taken away from him at the same time as his virginity.

I though that with Jacob gone I would be happy, but with every passing minute I feel more miserable and the situation with the pack is not helping. I feel so lonely.

"Mom, Dad, I wish that you were here with me, helping me sort this out. I need somebody on my corner since apparently everybody left me to fend on my own". I whispered as if saying a prayer.

"Yes, Sam tries to understand me and Emily is great, but there is no substitute for your parents. I need your unconditional love; I need you here with me"

Once again I allowed myself to cry over my dead parents but especially over my impending death.

**Jacob's POV**

"Seth wait, don't run so fast, I don't want you to get hurt"

"Catch me if you can, slow-poke" was Seth's answer as he ran even faster. Damn, my puppy is fast. But I don't complain this puts my mind at ease because I know he can outrun any leech and that could save his life if he ever encountered one of those creatures and he was alone. Then again that was unlikely because I never let him out of my sight when we go in the woods.

I start to worry because that's what just happened, he is out of my sight; starting to panic I sniff the air trying to locate his scent. I love his scent, it's so intoxicating, chocolate and strawberries, makes it hard to concentrate.

Just as I find it I feel him slam himself against my side.

"Got you!" he exclaims triumphantly.

"No, puppy that's where you are mistaken". He is completely taken by surprise when I use my strength to budge under his side making him tumble onto his back.

I stand over him, his much smaller frame hidden under my massive figure. He squirms under me trying to get away, but that is not going to happen, I have other plans...

"Jake let me go".

"Nope" as I say that I lower my large head and softly lick his neck and his muzzle. As I move to his stomach I feel his whole body relax and something that sounded like a whimper comes out of his mouth.

"Seth baby, change back to human form".

I feel that familiar tingling in the air and a few seconds later I'm admiring at the most beautiful creature I've ever seen. He is completely naked under me. His eyes fixated on mine, looking at me lovingly, just the way I always dreamed he would look at me. My heart soars at the realization that he belongs to me and I belong to him.

He whines softly while running his fingers through my fur.

"Jakey I love how your fur feels on my hands, it's so soft. My wolf, my dominant". I was taken aback by this because Seth almost never acknowledges my dominance out lout, he is too proud to do that. He has submitted to me and acts accordingly, but never talks about this.

"Love, shift back, I want to feel your warm skin against mine; I want to kiss your lips I want..." he stops and gives me a look that is a mixture of love, lust and need.

I shift back to human form and find myself naked on my hands and knees over Seth's body. Immediately I attack his lips kissing them roughly, I lick his bottom lip requesting access that he gladly grants. Our tongues begin sliding against each other inside his sweet tasting mouth; I could do this all day.

I kiss down his neck running my tongue over his copper skin; his skin feels so hot, hotter than usual. I stop to kiss and gently suck on his mating mark, every time I see it reminds me of that first time Seth gave himself to me fully. The best moment of my life, I've had many happy moments with Seth since he accepted me but nothing can compare to the feelings we both experienced that first time making love. The first time I heard him screaming my name, while I claimed him as mine forever.

"Puppy you taste so good".

I grind my hips rubbing our naked dicks together. A loud moan escapes his lips and he looks at me through half lidded eyes.

"Yeah baby so good, I want more".

"Flip over Seth". I order allowing my wolf to come out just for a second, letting my dominant side take over for a while. I've learned to control my wolf, I can never allow him to hurt my Seth, and I couldn't live with myself if that ever happened.

Like a good submissive he obeys and my wolf growls in satisfaction. He crosses his forearms on the damp forest floor and rests his head on them. His ass is sticking up, his pink pucker completely exposed to my viewing. So beautiful, everything about him is perfect and made just for me just as I was made just for him.

I graze my finger gently around the tight hole without pushing it in. I feel his whole body shudder at the light sensation.

"Baby pleeease I need you, don't torture me like this" he whines wantonly.

"Suck". I push three fingers into his mouth and he sucks them desperately, coating them in saliva.

Gently I push one finger in, which he readily accepts. I start moving it in and out and I feel him pushing against me, he wants more. My puppy is so eager, he wants his dominate inside him, claiming what belongs to him.

I add a second finger; he tenses for a minute but relaxes soon after. I start scissoring him stretching him, getting him ready to accept me. I add a third finger moving in and out of his now looser hole and hit that spot inside him that always makes him throw his head back and howl.

"Ahhhh Jake, right there, more, again" he gasped breathlessly.

I hit that spot again and saw him arch his back trying to intensify the sensation.

"Don't worry baby I'll give you just what you need"

I placed the tip of my cock on his entrance and pushed slowly. I felt the head slide in and Seth hissed when the feeling of being stretch beyond the reach of my fingers hit him. I stopped and began caressing his back, helping him relax. I feel him begin to relax and push a few more inches of my cock inside him.

He reacted by spreading his knees wider, welcoming my length and girth inside his body, undeniably submitting to me.

I stopped, giving him time to adjust. I know that it is difficult for him to accept my size, I'm big everywhere and my cock is not the exception. One downfall of being a wolf is that with our fast healing every time is like the first. That's amazing for me since every time I fuck him is like the first time, like being with a virgin. For Seth is a different story, it hurts every time and for that reason I try my best to lessen that pain. I go very slowly even though all I want is to ram my full length inside him and fuck him senseless, but I will never do that, I love him too much.

"I'm ok baby, move" this is music to my ears, as my own needs are becoming overwhelming I push the rest of my pole inside him.

"Fuck Jake, ahhhh!" Seth exclaims in a mixture of pleasure and pain.

"Yes baby say my name" I withdrew slowly pulling back so only the thick head of my cock teased Seth's tight ring of muscle, then carefully I push it back inside hard and deep just like he likes it. I fall into a slow and steady rhythm sliding in and out, feeling the warmth of Seth's body surrounding me. The smell of his arousal filling my nostrils, it is so different from his normal sweet scent, it's animalistic and passionate.

"Do you like this baby, you like having your ass stretched with my cock?"

"Yes baby I love it" he gasped.

I reach around his hip and grab his painfully swollen cock, leaking pre-cum. I start pumping him gently trying to match my strokes to my penetration.

"You're mine Seth, say it".

"I'm yours baby, all yours".

"Who do you belong to Seth; say the name of your master".

"Jacob, Jacob, Jacob," he kept repeating my name as the combined sensation of my cock inside him and my hand masturbating him moving in unison didn't allow him to think or construct a complete sentence. I felt my release approaching quickly.

"So fucking tight, Seth I'm close" my hand griping his hips tightly as I was going at an inhuman speed, hitting that spot inside him with each trust.

"I'm close too, Jake, harder".

"Ahhh shit faster".

"Deeper, fuck me harder, make me cum" his voiced sounded like a growl as he ordered me to fuck him. This is an order that I will gladly obey.

I slam into him with all I got, hitting that spot dead on.

"Jake I'm...cum...ing ahhhhhhh!" As his release hits him, his seed coats my hand before falling into the forest floor as heavy white droplets. I felt him tighten his grasp on my cock and that sent me over the edge. I could feel every inch of his insides.

"Seth..." All could say was his name, he occupied each one of my thoughts, he filled each one of my senses, his body and soul becoming one with me.

I pulled out of him and Seth whimpered at the loss of my body inside him. Laying next to him, I pull him toward me and kiss his forehead softly. Each one of us trying to catch our breath and waiting for our heart rate to slow down.

Seth cupped my cheek lovingly and looked intensely into my eyes.

"I love you Jacob."

"I love you too Seth"

I wake up covered in sweat, in human form and my abdomen glistening with my cum. I growled in frustration. Another fucking dream, I've been dreaming about Seth every single night since the day I left him on the cliffs.

I've been living in wolf form for six weeks now, getting to know my wolf, getting intimately acquainted with him. If I aspire at one day being able to control him I need to understand him first.

So far I've been able to see his animalistic and predatory self. He is selfish and has no consideration for others. The wolf is instinct, anger, desire and lust.

But he is also loyal and protective of the ones he loves or feels he owns.

I have to inject my humanity into him, so we can be allies not enemies in my battle to win Seth.

_Dreaming about fucking your imprint again?_ I heard the voice of my wolf inside my head, ugh is too early for this shit.

"Of course, you know very well that's all I dream about." I think about him all day and when I sleep my dreams take me to where I want to be, beside him... over him... inside him.

_Instead of dreaming and thinking you should be there with him, protecting him, loving him and of course fucking him. _

I try to ignore my wolf, Seth occupying my every thought, I wonder if he feels any of the effects of the imprint. Before I left I could've sworn I saw a slight change in him, his body language telling me that the imprint what starting to affect him. Does he ever think about me? Does he feel the pull of the imprint on his chest with the same intensity I feel it?

_Blah blah blah, you're such a marshmallow, I swear one of these days your cock is going to fall off and you'll turn into a girl. Maybe then Seth will fuck YOU, will you like that Jacqueline?_

Fuck off don't start with that shit again; and by the way, don't call me Jacqueline.

_I call it as I see it, you need to grow a pair, go back to La Push take your little bitch and show him who the boss is. Pound him into submission; make sure he doesn't even breathe without your approval._

"I've told you a thousand times, DO NOT CALL HIM BITCH! He is my mate and you'll respect him." That's the first lesson my wolf needs to learn to see Seth for what he is, my mate, my imprint, a human being with a position in our hierarchy much higher than my wolf.

I will not make him submit, that'll never work with Seth he is stubborn and proud, the harder I push the stronger his rejection. I cannot risk him hating me, like Jay said _"If you rape him in the middle of the forest, he'll hate you for the rest of eternity". _Those words were responsible in part of me running away that day on the cliffs.

_"The day you could've gotten this over with, just think that if you weren't such a pussy you would be with him right now. Holding him like I know you want to, Seth maybe even pregnant with your child" _

That image brought a smile to my face and made me regret my decision but I know he wouldn't be happy, if this didn't happen on his terms, I know it.

_"How do you know, can you see the future?_

I can't see the future but I know he wouldn't be happy if I forced him in any way. I have to earn his trust, his respect and his love.

_"Yes... and how are you planning to do that Dr. Phil? May I remind you that his birthday is coming up in a few weeks and that day all bets are off, I want him, I will not be denied what's mine; nobody is going to stop me"_

I know his birthday is coming up; I'm counting the minutes to that day. That's the day I'll go back, the day I'll have him in my arms again. But I'll try to control us, I'll do it for him, and for our future I don't want him to hate me.

_"You'll fail, my desire is too strong I've been denied too long and I'm pissed about it. You'll claim him that day Jacob Black. I'll guide you, dominate your every thought._

I cursed under my breath I know he is right it. It's easier said than done, I feel strong and in control here from a distance. But when I'm next to him inhaling his scent, feeling the warmth that radiates from his body I may succumb to my wolf.

The sense of dread was so strong it felt like a hangman's noose around my neck. I don't want to hurt my Seth but the day of his sixteenth birthday anything goes; it will be a battle that I may loose either way.

If I claim him he will hate me forever, if I don't my wolf will torture me with a cruelty that only he is capable of. Who is more important Seth or my wolf? They are both part of me Seth is my life and my wolf is my soul.

I'm so screwed.

**Seth's POV**

As the cold rainy days of spring made way to the lazy days of summer I felt more like my old self, still angry and sarcastic but that's part of my charm. Little by little I was getting back to my routine like it was before phasing for the first time. Not that it was great but it was better than all the shit that happened after. The pack still didn't acknowledge my existence but I didn't care about them either. The only people who speak to me are Sam and Emily. Sam probably feels obligated to interact with me and Emily is too good of a person to be a douche bag like the rest of the pack.

I can't believe Leah is siding with them, what a piece of work my sister turned out to be.

Speaking of the pack, I think I'm not considered a member of the pack anymore and I will have to agree with that. I don't go on patrols by orders of he whose name shall not be said. I don't even attend the meetings anymore since nobody even looks at me and I don't see the point of putting myself through all that.

Only one thing about this whole mess brightens my day, it's been six weeks and the big bad wolf has not returned. That thought alone brings a smile to my face, he was gone and so were his lustful stares, his possessive kisses, and his strong muscular arms holding me while the warmth that emanates from his body warms me up in the cold nights. Wait a minute, I'm glad he is gone, why am I thinking about his arms and his embrace? I'm so damaged it's a miracle I have not lost my mind.

Today is one of those nice lazy Saturdays; I already cleaned my room as I promised Emily. She and Sam went to the town to run some errands and will be gone most of the day. Leah is also gone; she is probably in Paul's house. What am I supposed to do all day? I have no friends, nobody to talk to. I suddenly realized that I could do something I wanted to try since that fateful day when I became a wolf. I ran downstairs leaving a note for Sam letting him know I'll be home before sundown. Exiting through the back door I ran into the woods, checking for any humans that could see me I took off my shorts and tie them to my leg and phase into the sandy wolf.

Today I am going to test my speed; I am going to run like I wanted to do for a long time. Today nobody is going to stop me; nobody is going to prevent me from doing what I want with false worry for my safety. Yes he worries that I may trip and hurt myself but doesn't worry about hurting me when he impales me with his meat pole making me bleed.

I take off running loving the feel of the air on my fur, as I pass the trees they are nothing more than a blur of green, brown and black. I jump over fallen logs and avoid branches with an agility that truly surprises me. I felt alive for the first time in a long time.

I ran for several hours without ever noticing where I was going. Eventually I found myself in an unfamiliar terrain, this forest is darker; since the canopy is thicker not allowing much light to get trough. The sounds are also different, the chirping of the crickets sounds sad, not cheery like in the forest around La Push. This place is dark and dismal, any person with half a mind would turn around and run in the other direction, but I was intrigued by this forest and felt compelled to keep walking going deeper into these unknown woods.

All of the sudden an unfamiliar scent hit me and my whole body shook, but not out of fear but from longing ... need?

I stopped in my tracks, could this be a vampire? I'm aware they smell different to me, the same way I smell different to them. But this scent is at the same time unknown but deeply familiar I know in my hearth that whoever owns this scent will never hurt me.

"Where is that scent coming from?" I asked myself as I inhaled again; it smelled like the moss that grows on the trees around my home, like some of the wildflowers I used to pick for my mother when I was a little boy. It reminded me of home, of feeling safe in my warm bed even during one of the storms that usually plagued Forks; it gave me a feeling of unconditional love and commitment.

I continued walking following the scent, I knew that I should turn around, that I shouldn't follow it, but it was like my mind gave my body commands but my body decided to ignore them. I felt like was being pulled into my doom and I couldn't stop myself, but more importantly I didn't want to stop. For the first time in weeks I felt relief from the dull pain in my chest, I welcomed the relief but still found it odd.

I continued walking, the only sound being the thump of my paws on the soft ground. I reach a small clearing covered with green grass and a harsh shudder possesses my body as I am confronted with a big russet wolf standing in the middle of the clearing. Its big brown eyes looking directly into mine, piercing my soul, in his eyes I see so many emotions but the most prevalent one is love.

"Seth" is all hear before I turn around and start running towards La Push.


	17. Chapter 17

**I want to thank all those of you who wrote reviews and added this story as one of your favorites, you guys rock!**

**I should mention that I don't own any of the characters I just go to Stephenie Meyer and ask her if they can come out and play.**

**Chapter 17: The encounter**

"I can't believe you found me" I heard him say, but with every word I just ran faster trying to get away from him and praying he didn't command me to stop.

"Don't be scared my Seth, I'm not coming after you, please slow down, I don't want you to hurt yourself" said Jacob with a softness I didn't recognize, he seemed to be genuinely worried about my well- being. I found that totally hypocritical since it was coming from the one person who wanted to inflict a world of physical and emotional pain on me.

Ignoring his plea I continued to run as fast as my legs allowed and man was I fast! I may not be strong, at least for wolf standards, I was still stronger than most humans, but I make it up in speed. My smaller body allowed me to evade branches and snake around the trees with ease. I did not even feel the familiar burning in my muscles I used to feel whenever I ran in school, then again that was before phasing. Something that seemed like it happened ages ago, it's hard to believe it's only been six weeks since phasing for the first time.

I just wanted to get away from this dark forest as fast as I could, especially because of the monster that inhabited it. This was almost like one of those stories children are told so they won't wander into the woods. The darkness that consumes everything, the braches of the trees braiding against each other, in an interminable web, managing to keep the sunlight and all its redeeming warmth out of this God forsaken place. The millions of little creatures, crawling, sliding and climbing, all of them behaving different from their usual patterns, even the crickets stop emitting their usual chirping too afraid of the beast that dwells within the confines of this green jail.

"Seth, stop running!" Jacob commanded, I cursed loudly in my head as I stopped sliding on the wet forest floor, causing leaves and branches to heap together around my paws.

"Seth I won't be back for a while but you have to promise me to be safe, don't wander so far from the Reservation again" said Jacob in a more recognizable tone since it had his usual command undertone.

"Promise me or I swear I'll come after you right now and fuck you right here on the forest floor like I wanted to do for the longest time." Jacob's voice was getting louder with every word.

"SETH answer me, I mean it, I'll pound into you without mercy"

"Yes I promise, don't worry, the last thing I want is to be close to you in any way. Stay away for as long as you want, if it was up to me you would stay away forever. I have an idea, why don't you give your imprint the best gift of all and go kill yourself?" I spat at him, every feeling of disgust and anger coming to the surface.

"Seth... I love you"

I didn't acknowledge those last words; I knew it hurt him so I did it on purpose. I'm not a bad person, but with this whole fucked up situation all the darkness that I have in my hearth is coming to the surface and spitting in my face. I hurt Sam telling him that our parents would be disappointed with what he became. Now I tell Jacob to go kill himself. The worst thing is that I don't feel any remorse for doing this, maybe my parents would be disappointed with what I became.

Pretty soon I found myself in known territory; I recognized the forest around La Push. The canopy was not as thick compared with the monster's forest, trunks and rocks are covered with dark green moss probably as a result of the almost constant rain. I heard all the familiar sounds, the sound of the sea breaking on the rocks, and the light buzzing sounds of the insect life. The easily recognizable smell of brine and the faint lingering scent of the wolves, left behind as they patrol the area in their effort to protect their families and friends. I even welcomed the light rain that seems to constantly shower our piece of the world.

I slowed down relieved that Jacob became silent but especially because he was not following me. Phasing back to human I untied the cutoffs I tied to my leg and put them on quickly. My mind was a jumble of feelings, thoughts and questions, why did I feel so obsessed with following a scent that was completely unknown? What made me wonder into that forest, to end up in front of the only being I wanted to avoid more than vampires? What was this strange feeling I constantly had on my chest, this dull pain? Why did it go away as I got close to him?

I forgot everything I'd learned over the years and just went into unknown territory with complete disregard for my safety. Did I care so little about my well-being that it was all the same to me if I lived or died?

Will Jacob kill himself like I told him to?

This last question sent shivers up my spine so intense that I had to stop walking; I felt my legs give under me, my whole body shaking in fear. I had to hold on to a nearby tree trunk taking several deep breaths trying to calm myself down. I was scared of my words being the motivating factor for Jake to make the decision to take his life, my head was pounding with the intense guilt I was feeling,

But why should I care? That was what I wanted, to get rid of him. I had to admit that I wanted him gone but not dead, I couldn't live with my conscience if he hurts himself because of me. I panicked, feeling remorse for the first time in a long time, now it was me who took it too far. I looked around and saw that I was still protected by the forest, I needed to phase, and I needed to fix this. Maybe I was being stupid but if I have a shred of humanity left, I couldn't facilitate someone's death, even if it was somebody I hate.

I allowed the anger and the overwhelming heat take over and felt the light rumble of my wolf as she came forward making me burst into my wolf form.

"Jake" I called in my mind.

"Jake" no answer.

"Shit Jake, answer me, I know I said something very hurtful but I didn't mean it" I was pleading to him as terror invaded my every thought. Maybe I was too late? I took too long to think about the possible outcome of my demand.

"I'm here Seth" he sounded broken, not like the arrogant cocky boy I grew to despise and envy.

"Thank God, man I'm sorry about what I said, really I didn't mean it."

"Seth you know I will do whatever you want, I can't deny you anything" this thought sounded like a choked whine, this was very unlike him; I must have really hurt him this time.

"If that's true, why do you insist in mating with me, even though you know I don't want it?" I asked feeling angry with the hypocrisy of the situation.

"That's different Seth, as alpha I'm hardwired to mate as soon as I imprint, it's my wolf; he takes over, dominating me. My wolf it's a part of me I can't ignore, it's instinctual." Explained Jacob, I felt bile rise up to my mouth making it taste bitter.

"Whatever man, you are so full of shit" I should learn my lesson, feeling sorry for Jacob was useless and the outcome was never good. I should've kept my big mouth shut and this problem would've taken care of itself. No Jacob, no imprint and with no imprint I could have hope for a normal future once again.

"It's true Seth, talk to Sam if you don't believe me" his tone was matter of fact and that did nothing to calm me down. Now he was telling me what to do, the nerve.

"I already know the story, don't make me relive it. I'm sorry to say this because Sam is my brother, but I think you two use your wolf as an excuse to go around satisfying yourself without thinking of the consequences of your actions" disgust lacing my every thought.

"I'm sorry Seth, I wish it would be different, I dream that you and I fall in love, that I hold you as you look lovingly in my eyes"

I had to interrupt him, incapable of listening to any more of that inane babble. "You are delusional, that will NEVER happen"

"Maybe you are right, but I want you to know that I love you and only wish you and I would have a happy future together." Pleaded Jacob, emotion lacing every thought as he played images on his head of the two of us together and for the first time since the imprinting, it was not sexual. In some of them he was just standing in front of me holding me in his arms, in others we were walking on the beach holding hands. They were all different but each one of them showed an aspect of our life together that I would've never considered.

"You know what, I'm out of here, I did what I had to do, to protect my conscience and my soul". I had to break the mental bond that was allowing us to communicate before he could see the thought that disturbed me immensely. When I saw the image in Jacob's head of him holding me in his arms, I saw my reflection on his eyes, the way he sees me. The reflection was nothing like the person I saw in the mirror every day, the sad boy with unruly hair and dark circles under his eyes did not exist in his mind. To his eyes I was beautiful, perfect even, my copper skin had a light shimmer on it, like gold dust had been sprinkled all over it. My gray eyes stood out under dark heavy brows, the line of my jaw was strong and delicate but in no way feminine, my pink lips looked soft and had the most perfect pout. That was definitely not the way I saw myself at all, in my thoughts I'd always been ordinary, a little ugly even, short and skinny with bad hair and a worse attitude.

"Ok Seth, thank you baby and remember that I live only for you". Ugh, could he be any cheesier, I thought as I phased into my human form again. I found the pants that in my haste to phase instead of tying them to my leg I threw them on the floor; at least I didn't rip them, but now they were all wet.

I felt proud of myself as I was almost sure Jacob was going to obey my command and check himself out. I don't know if I was incredibly stupid or just have a death wish for my ass, but at least I'll be able to look at my reflection without feeling shame.

I left the darkness and protection of the forest and ended up in my back yard. I went inside to the vacant house as Sam and Emily where not back from running their errands and Leah was still gone, probably having a fuck fest with Paul at his house. I thought this was a good moment for a shower, my feet where covered in mud and I was very sweaty and dirty from all my running.

I went upstairs to the shower and locked the door behind me. After adjusting the temperature of the water I got in reveling on how nice the cold water felt on my burning skin and tired muscles. I start soaping my chest feeling every muscle, every hill and valley that I had. I felt especially proud of the incipient and hopefully still developing six pack.

I was still completely bare everywhere as I lost all my hair except the indomitable mess on top of my head, I touched my crotch as to confirm what I already knew, yep, still smooth. My hand brushed against my limp cock and it reacted immediately. I touched its length and it was quickly becoming swollen, the smell of my own arousal filling the bathroom. I bit my bottom lip and curled my fingers around my shaft.

I had not touched myself in a long time, which was not normal for a fifteen year old. Maybe I was depressed, if somebody had all the right in the world to be depressed that would be me. But right now it felt right, I needed this, I was by myself in the house so I didn't have to worry about Sam or Leah hearing me. This was a rare opportunity and I was going to take advantage of it.

I cupped my balls remembering when the last time I came was, it was in the cliffs when I came in Jacobs's mouth. I was very surprised with myself that instead of disgust I felt something different when I remembered that day, lust.

I adjusted the grip adding pressure as I moved slowly along my stiff cock enjoying every second of this sweet torture. I let my mind wander as I felt the small coil inside me starting to wind. With my free hand I touched my thighs trying to find my sweet spot. Sam explained to me that it doesn't feel the same when you touch it yourself but I wanted to try. I found it and just like Sam said; it didn't feel as good as it did when Jacob touched me.

A low groan escaped my lips as the pleasure took over, in my mind dozens of images at the same time, but distinct from each other. Strong arms holding me, protecting me and enveloping me it their warmth, full lips that contour perfectly to my own. Passionate possessive kisses that I love to hate. Strong hands touching my thighs bringing me to the verge of ecstasy.

All these images were flooding my mind, enveloping me in their clutches, they were addicting, corrupting and there was nothing I could do to stop them, my mind was too far gone.

My moans and gasps were coming faster and deeper as I increased the speed of my strokes. I truly hoped nobody got home before I finish because there was no turning back now.

I felt my release approaching and lost myself even deeper in my fantasies and the pleasant warmth that enveloped my body making me shake.

"Shit baby this feels so good, I want more, suck me harder, yes just like that, let me cum in your mouth " I hissed, as I felt my whole body quiver in delight as the images in my head and the feeling of my hand on my length combined to make me sink deeper into the abyss.

After a couple of minutes I felt that coil unwind in waves of pleasure as I cum screaming his name, Jacob! I cum long and hard, spraying the wall, where immediately the water rinsed it away. I leaned against the shower's cold tiled wall, my legs feeling weak after the intense release I just experienced.

I certainly hoped nobody heard me, I thought while coming down from my high. As I became more aware I felt confused and ashamed when I realized I just jerked off to memories of Jake. What was happening to me?

I finished my shower, get out and dry myself tying the towel around my waist. I was trying not to think about what just happened; maybe I could pretend I jerked off to the image of a girl with big breasts and full lips. I could pretend I was not a depraved teenager jerking off to the memory of being raped, which was truly disturbing. I walked slowly to my room, there was no rush, and thankfully nobody was home. I looked through my drawers trying to find something to wear and decide on jeans and a dark blue t-shirt.

I almost ran downstairs to the living room; not being able to stay in my room any longer, so many things inside my scarcely furnished bedroom reminded me of him. From the bed where we slept together a couple of times, the walls where he would corner me to and attack my lips in a relentless quest for possession, the door frame through which he would disappear allowing me to be thankful of one more day of freedom. Taking the remote I start to surf through the channels trying to find something to watch, that will take my mind off this whole situation. I groaned in frustration when I realized there was nothing good on television, what's wrong with Saturday afternoon TV? It was pitiful.

All of the sudden there was a knock on the door. I answered it, only to find Quil just standing there with a stupid grin on his face.

"Sam is not home" was all I said to him since he was one of the conspirators in the silent treatment I'd been suffering these last few weeks. I was especially hurt by his attitude since I considered him a friend. He confided in me about all his feelings for Paul, even cried on my shoulder, and when I needed him he just turned his back on me, asshole. Now he could go ram himself.

I saw his face fall and the grin vanished in an instant. "Actually, I came to see how you were doing." Said Quill softly

"Well you saw me, don't let the door hit you in your way out." I said acidly.

"Wow you are worse than I thought, I never heard you speak with so much bitterness before" Quil was slowly inching into the living room; apparently some people couldn't take a hint.

"Well that's what being fucked and abandoned by your so called friends does to you" I looked away as I felt the sting of the tears I didn't want him to see me shed.

"What do you mean abandoned?

"Fuck, Quil, apparently stupid is contagious, when was the last time you talked to me? I chocked at these words.

"I don't know, a few weeks ago, we were ordered to stay away, no teasing or making fun of you. We were told you went through something very difficult and needed some time by yourself."

"Who told you to stay away?" I asked feeling aggravated, especially because my prime suspect was no other than Mr. Horny Alpha himself

"Sam did" answered Quil, only to continue with his explanation. "At first we were confused as to why Jake left so suddenly, we all knew it was something related to you. We tried to put two and two together and concluded Jake claimed you on the cliffs where Paul saw you two."

"We also knew that you didn't want to have sex with him, so if anything happened it was not consensual"

"Consen ... what the fuck Quil have you been studying the dictionary, speak clearly"

"Damn it Seth, we thought Jake raped you!" he sounded exasperated, I didn't ask him to be here anyway, I didn't even remember asking him to come inside the house for that matter. "None of us knew what to say or how to treat you. We all knew Jake was going to do it, but we all thought he was going to honor Sam's request and wait for your sixteenth birthday."

"We had to know what happened, we were too conflicted because on one side is our allegiance to our alpha and on the other side is our friendship with you. Our brotherhood includes both of you, so it was really hard. When we came to Sam with all this he told us we were incorrect, we didn't believe him at first, but he explained that if Jake had claimed you he couldn't leave your side no matter what. An imprinted wolf will not leave the side of his newly claimed mate."

"I have to confess we were all angry at you because he is our friend, and you drove him away from his home"

"And nobody cared about me, did you? Listen to yourself, _we all knew Jake was going to do it_ you sound like you are totally fine with a pack member raping another one. But if the rapist decides to throw a tantrum and leave, then there is a serious problem. But it doesn't surprise me, after all he is the alpha and I'm not even in the pack anymore"

"What do you mean you are not in the pack anymore?" asked Quil with concern in his voice.

"I'm not allowed to patrol; I'm not invited to the meetings so I just assumed I'm not in the pack"

"Don't think that Seth, we all miss you, for a person that is always demanding not to be judged you are very quick to pass judgment"

"Go to hell Quil" I was losing what little patience I had really fast, and had no tolerance for holier- than- thou attitudes.

"No Seth, you have to listen for a change, regardless of your feelings toward Jake he is a good alpha, he is fair and understanding. He is also a good friend; he had always been there for us when we needed him"

I threw my hands up in the air in frustration "Oh this is precious, why don't we build him a fucking statue? We can name it The Monument to Depravity"

"Seth you are not being fair" said Quill balling his fists.

"Not fair, I'll tell you what is not fair, being imprinted on by a horny hormonal wolf that sees you as a piece of meat. The only purpose of his miserable existence is to pound me into his sheets, whether I want him to or not." I snarled, feeling the held back tears roll down my cheeks. I collapsed in defeat to the sofa bringing my hands to my face. Quil ran to my side and held me, the first physical contact I had with any member of the pack in months.

"Seth, I'm here for you buddy, shhh shhh" Quil tried to soothe me as I cried on his shoulder.

"I'm not even terribly afraid of bodily harm if Jake ever finds out I touched you, well...just a little afraid" he joked trying to lighten the mood.

"Don't worry he won't be barging through that door any time soon" I whispered my voice sounding strained and thick with tears.

"How can you be so sure?"

"He told me this morning" I was starting to calm down and when I looked up into Quil's face I see this inquisitive look in his face.

"What do you mean, he told you? You've kept in contact with him? Well it shouldn't surprise me, you are his imprint after all, and he needs you desperately" said Quil sounding knowledgeable, for somebody who was perceived as a goofball, he knew more that anybody gave him credit for.

"It's not that, we haven't been staying in contact" I began to tell him about my morning adventure, I told him about feeling compelled to go into the forest with complete disregard to my safety, the scent and the annoying pain on my chest.

Quil just smiled at me, not in a mocking way, but in understanding. "Seth I hope you don't hate me for saying this but I'm happy for you, its happening"

"What the hell is happening?"

"The imprint taking its course on you, you are beginning to feel the effects of it".

"What do you know about imprints? You haven't imprinted on anybody, or have you?" I was curious about this possibility.

"Seth, first of all I tried to learn as much as I can about imprinting because I'm desperate for it. I just know that if I imprint on anybody is going to be on Paul and sooner or later he will return my affections. I feel bad for your sister but I have to think about my own happiness. You have no idea how hard it is to go by Paul's house during patrol and hear them making love, secretly wishing it was me pinned under his body. To see their thoughts and know she is touching what should me mine, only mine." His voice trailed off and his look was distant, probably reliving all the painful memories he just described.

"Please spare me the details"

"Second, at my house pack issues are discussed openly since Old Quil, my grandfather, lives with us and he is one of the elders. I can tell you that your situation with Jacob has been discussed extensively. Grandpa is sure you'll not be able to resist much longer". He sounded proud of this knowledge and excited at the prospect that any of his words might be correct or prove themselves true.

Quil had this stupid grin on his face and that annoyed me tremendously. What did he know?

"Quil, I don't want Jacob to even breathe the same air as me, what the hell you are implying, that I'm falling in love with him?"

"Exactly" there was a hint of celebration in his voice.

"HELL NO, gross!" I was repulsed by even the implication that I might have any feelings toward Jacob. This was impossible; nobody could be in love with somebody they loathe; that only happens on television or in silly romantic books written for teenage girls.

"Seth, open your eyes and look at what's right in front of your face." Quil was the one getting impatient now, his voice getting slightly louder, his shoulders looking hiked up and tense and his breathing increasing.

What did he expect of me? There was no way he was right, I just knew it. "Quil, don't expect me to do a happy dance because of what you just told me. It's impossible, never, you hear me, never. I'll never love Jacob, I don't do now and I'll never will."

"Why are you so fucking stubborn Seth, you don't know what I would give to be in your position."

"Take it Quil, all you have to sacrifice is your freedom, your dignity and your ass." I spat at him getting more annoyed with each breath.

Quil continued not even acknowledging my comment. "I can only hope to have somebody love me with the passion and commitment that Jake loves you. I may never know love like this in my lifetime and here you are throwing away the love of not only a wonderful man, but your soul mate. Do you know how many people go through life never knowing true love, never finding the second half of their souls? How many people find this special one but fate or life's circumstances separate them. They may never find their other half, that person settled with somebody else feeling content with second best never too know the truth and power of true love."

"Shit Quil you are such a girl." He smiled at my comment, once again looking relaxed.

"Let me remind you that you are more of a girl than I'll ever be, at least I'm a dominant" he smiled but the smile didn't reach his eyes, he still looked sad.

"Fuck you Quil, oh sorry your ass has an owner and his name is Paul. Man, you may be a dominant, but will bottom for Paul in a second." Quil laughed heartily at my statement.

"Yes I would, he wouldn't have to ask me twice." Said Quil, truly amused

I'll forgive him today for throwing this dominant crap on my face; next time he'll get my fist on his face.

"Ok, enough of this shit; I had enough drama for today. Are you hungry?" The question was unnecessary since there had never been a wolf with poor appetite, at least none that I knew of.

"Always," answered Quil and he followed me into the kitchen. It was getting late, Sam and Emily never stayed out for so long, but I was not too worried. When Emily shopped she had a tendency of losing track of time, if anything I felt bad for Sam having to endure it for so many hours.

I decided to prepare a couple of sandwiches for each one of us; we sat down at the table just catching up on current events of the pack.

Paul and Leah were officially out as a couple and everybody in the pack accepted it with open arms, except Quil of course, but nobody but me knew that. Jared boned Kim and they had been inseparable ever since, I felt a slight pain on my stomach at this statement. I still felt happy for Kim, she won't need for her braces to come off, Jared loved her just the way she was.

Embry was still the same, quiet and keeping to himself. He always puzzles everybody with his calm and controlled demeanor. Despite what everybody thought, Brady phased but not Collin. In fact, Collin was showing many of the usual signs but everything stopped and he didn't phase, nobody could explain it. Sam was still convinced it would happen, he just didn't know when.

"Do you know Brady and Collin?" I asked Quil because I didn't remember ever speaking to either one of them.

"Not really, I only know they were freshmen and used to be best friends until Brady joined the pack. Now he is not allowed to interact with his best friend. I feel bad for Collin but it's for the best, we can be very unstable in the beginning, the only one that always remains in control never phasing out of anger is you."

The front door swung open and in walked Sam, his arms filled with bags and a look of exhaustion on his face. Shopping is one of Sam's least favorite activities and by the looks of it, today was torture for my brother. At least this would be the last shopping trip for him in a while because with summer approaching the construction business got a lot busier giving him the perfect excuse to avoid any future shopping trips.

"Can we help?" Quil and I asked at the same time

"Sure, there are just a few bags left but Sam will appreciate the help" Said Emily as she walked inside, carrying several bags herself.

We went outside to get the last bags from Sam's truck; we brought them inside and took them to the kitchen. Once there I noticed most of them were groceries but there were several bags from a party store in Los Angeles.

"You went all the way to Los Angeles, what's the occasion?"

"Seth don't be silly, your birthday of course, we're going to have a party" said Emily enthusiastically.

I did not share Emily's excitement at my coming birthday and it was evident by my expression. I felt the blood rush from my face and had to sit down. I tried to forget my birthday was coming up in several weeks and was apparently very successful since Emily's mention of a party caught me by surprise. You could hear a pin drop in the kitchen, Sam, Emily and Quil just looking at me not knowing what to do or say.

"I'm sorry Emily, but I don't want a party" Emily moved towards me, kneeling in front of me and using her thumb to clean two tears from my face.

"But Seth, you only turn sixteen once" said Sam looking sadly at me.

I glared at him, I didn't want to say anything rude out of respect to Emily, because she has been nothing but nice to me since the day I met her.

"This is your fault Sam, you made a deal with the devil and now I'm going to pay for it", I whispered not being able to find my voice.

I stood up shakily and headed upstairs leaving the three of them in the kitchen. I got under the covers and wept bitterly, the pain overwhelming and all consuming.


	18. Chapter 18 My Two Sisters

**I want to thank all those of you who wrote reviews and added this story as one of your favorites.**

**I should mention that I don't own any of the characters I just go to Stephenie Meyer and ask her if they can come out and play.**

Chapter 18 My two sisters

As it usually happens when a person is immersed in a depressed state of mind, I lost track of time, unaware of how much time passed since I came upstairs to hide in the darkness of my room and the relative security of my bed. I kept relieving in my mind all the images of the past few weeks, allowing all the hate, resentment and anger toward the person I felt was responsible for my fate to take precedence in my mind. I was lost in thought when I heard a knock on the door

"Go away, I don't want to see or talk to anybody". I said my voice thick with tears. I don't remember crying so much never before in my life and it's all Jacob's fault.

"Seth, is Emily, can I come in?" Her sweet voice reached my ears, with the tenderness and recognizable compassion that was so characteristic of her.

"Emily, trust me, I'm not good company right now" I was not lying, I'm not usually the most optimistic and cheery person there is and this whole fucked up situation made my attitude even worse.

"I understand, are you hungry sweetie?"

"Not really, I just want to sleep, thank you anyway". I sniffed and took the covers pulling them over my head. Something that is completely stupid since with my high body temperature pretty soon it would be unbearable under my blanket.

"Ok Seth, go to sleep but tomorrow you and I are going to have a conversation"

I didn't ask what she wanted to talk about, but I could guess, all the while secretly hoping she wouldn't add herself to the list of Jacob's defenders. I really didn't want to have any harsh comments directed at her and didn't know if I'll be able to contain myself if she started talking about the wonders of imprinting, specifically about any redeeming characteristics of a certain hyper-sexed wolf. Feeling exhausted after a long day I welcomed sleep and the few hours of relief it provided.

The next morning I woke up to the sweet aroma of cinnamon rolls, bacon, eggs and breakfast potatoes. My mouth begins to water as soon as I open my eyes; the rumbling in my stomach letting me know it was time to feed the beast. As I sat up on my bed, the first thing to hit me is the annoying pain of my chest; I rubbed my chest gently trying to make that uncomfortable feeling go away. I went to the bathroom checking my chest in the mirror, looking specifically for any bruises or marks that could explain this pain I've been experiencing for over two months, but nothing, everything looked normal.

When I get downstairs Emily greets me with one of her wonderful trademark smiles. "Good morning Seth, breakfast will be ready in a few minutes."

I sat down at the kitchen table; our kitchen was not big, but we had enough space for four or five big wolves, which came in handy since the pack is always coming here looking for food. It didn't have any fancy appliances either; we really didn't need anything but the basics. Emily loves to cook like her mother taught her, using simple ingredients, just the essential equipment, but pouring her heart into every dish, that's probably the reason that everything she makes tastes delicious. I didn't dare ask if I could help with anything, everybody knew that when Emily was cooking she didn't like people trying to help; she says they only get in the way.

Looking around I see the old cabinets, that even though they are older than me, they are in very good shape. Their condition speaks for the careful craftsmanship of the person who made them, my father. There are so many memories in this small kitchen, memories of happier times, when life was easy, decisions were simple and hope filled our hearts. My eyes wander around until they find the back door, it was open and I could see through the glass of the storm door. Looking at the blue skies and bright sun I wish that this beautiful weather would lift my spirits at least a little bit. But I sat in silence feeling angry, downhearted and lonely, not even the good night sleep and the nice weather was capable of lifting my spirits.

As on cue in comes one of the biggest traitors in my fucked up life, my loving sister Leah, damn it! She reeks of Paul, doesn't she shower after he fucks her?"

"Good morning Seth", she dares speak to me, with a shy smile in her stupid face.

"Drop dead, Leah" I spat at her, I was angry with the pack for ignoring me all these weeks, but with her is much more intense. She betrayed me, when her brother needed her, she chose a friend, that speaks of her moral fiber and the weak bond she shares with her siblings.

"Seth, sweetie, please don't talk to your sister like that"

"Emily, ugh" I bit my tongue because I really didn't want to say what was on my mind, even though I just felt like telling Emily to mind her own damn business, that the bitch in front of me didn't deserve any pleasantries.

Leah just stood in the same spot she was when she initially addressed me, opening and closing her mouth like a fish out of the water. I guess she was trying not to start an argument. I wish she did, that will give me a chance to tell her what I think about her. That she is the worst sister in the world; she abandoned me when I needed her the most. I know we are not the lovey-dovey type, but I expected more of her.

Then she took me by surprise by walking over to me, putting her arms around my shoulders, leaning against me and giving me a hug. What the fuck? Does she think she is going to make me forget weeks of absence with a stupid hug?

"I'm sorry Seth, for everything." She sat next to me hesitantly, insecure; who the hell is this and what did she do with my sister?

"I know I haven't been the best sister, fuck I've been a lousy sister, but I didn't know what to do or what to say. After Sam told us you had a very hard experience and needed to be left alone, I though that Jacob you know... "She choked on her words not knowing how to phrase it.

"Paul and I had a big argument when he told me what he did, I was furious and blamed him for everything. The argument got heated and we both lost our temper phasing and fighting in our wolf forms." I just stared wide eyed at her.

"He sported a nice scar on his back for a couple of days, but I'm afraid that's nothing compared to what Jacob is going to do to him when he comes back." Leah said this with a mixture of pride and concern.

"What do you mean? What is Jacob going to do to him?" I asked not because I was worried in any way, but because of a morbid curiosity of how he was going to be punished.

"We don't know, Jacob just warned him that he was going to pay for what he did to you two."

"You are not the only one who fears Jacob's return." That statement made my face fall and reignited the pain in my head. Leah noticed, taking my hands into hers she squeezed them softly. Again this is not like my sister at all, am I inside a fucking Twilight Zone episode?

"Seth I'm here for you, even if you don't believe me please know that I've been very worried about you. I had a lot of shit to sort out, you have been foremost in my mind, but if you add all the problems I've had with Paul, plus my usual drama, it's just a lot you know. You know I don't deal well with problems, especially when they involve the people love. But you have been in my mind and it breaks my heart when I hear you crying at night." I didn't realize she could hear me, I guess I forgot about her wolf hearing.

"Why did you stop talking to me?" I could feel the tears I was holding back give way.

"Seth, I'm so angry with this whole fucked-up situation; I don't know how to handle all this. I hate Jacob with every fiber of my being; you are the only person that hates him more than I do. I've been disgusted with him, from the moment he imprinted on you and with every day that passes, it gets worse. I knew I shouldn't be telling you these things and injecting you with more venom. Our venom is hatred and we both feed from it when it comes to Jacob. That's one of the reasons I stayed away, if you are ever going to give this imprint a chance I can not be in the back of your head telling you to reject it"

"If it was up to me, you and I would just take off and disappear from here. I'll even leave Paul behind if you asked me to, even thought I hope you don't." She chuckled lightly amused with her own comment.

"You will do that for me Leah, help me escape? Jacob could kill you." The possibility of escaping never crossed my mind. Could it be possible? It would be very risky but not impossible. The only problem was, that I didn't know how it would affect Sam and Emily, will Jacob hurt Sam or even Emily in a rage induced attack? If Leah helped me she wouldn't be able to come back, we will be exiles, with no pack, no home and no family.

"I don't care Seth, you are my brother and I love you. You and Sam are the only family I have left and like a mama lion, I would defend you, even if that means losing my life in the process." I knew at that moment that I would never ask Leah to do something so risky, my life was ruined and I know firsthand how shitty it feels, I'm incapable of subjecting my sister to the same fate.

"The problem is that I'm sure he would find us and then you will pay for it." She said this not as an excuse to avoid getting involved in my attempt to escape, but as a fact well known to both of us.

"We would both pay for it, in different ways though." I said sadly, thinking what perverse things he would do to us, my sister will probably end up with half the bones in her body broken while me, I shudder at the thought of me, screaming while Jacob fucks me raw.

"Seth are we good? Am I forgiven?" Leah's tone was pleading and I could see the sincerity in her eyes.

"Yes, we are good Lee Lee, but don't abandon me again please"

"Never again squirt". Leah ruffled my hair and we both laughed, it was simple and to the point, we didn't need an elaborate production. Like any normal sibling we're going to have problems but it feels good to have her in my corner again.

Emily announced that breakfast was ready, we were so involved in our conversation that I didn't even notice when Sam came in the room. He looked sad and tired, even older. I know that as long as we phase we don't age, but to me with every passing day, Sam looks older.

She prepared quite a spread including freshly baked cinnamon rolls. I have to confess that my conversation with Leah made me feel a little better. I wiped the tears off my face and accepted the mountain of food Emily placed in front of me. My rumbling stomach welcomed all the wonderful food Emily prepared. Everything was delicious and I ate until I could barely breathe.

I stood up to help with the dishes, Leah and Sam had to leave to go on patrol. I guessed this was one of their subtle ways of giving Emily and me some privacy for the conversation she mentioned last night.

After we finished in the kitchen Emily invited me to go for a walk on the beach. Today was one of those rare sunny days in La Push and I welcomed the idea of going to the beach and feeling the sun warming my skin. I knew she wanted to talk to me and I knew I probably will not like what she has to say, but for her sake I was willing to give it a chance.

We walked holding hands, from a distance anybody would think we were a couple, Emily is several years older than me, but for somebody looking at us from far away they would think is just a girl who is into short guys. It felt good to seem normal if only for a little while, to have the facade of a typical relationship.

I've lived here all my life, but breathing the crisp ocean air I can't help but marvel at the area around us. The ocean's surface was calm like an endless mirror capable of reflecting all the wonders of the sky, sleek like stone but dangerous like an angry dog. The gentle waves rose like small mountains running over the sand in an interminable dance. The small particles of sand run between my toes feeling warm under today's bright sun.

We walked in companionable silence, I still felt very sad, I wanted to fight, scream, kick something or even better, somebody whose name starts with J. I felt a growl rumble on my chest as I thought about the inevitability of the events that will take place on my birthday. Emily sat down on a big piece of driftwood and I sat next to her. I heard her take a few deep breaths and guessed she was trying to calm herself so she could be able to talk to me, but didn't understand why, her heart was beating fast and she seemed to have lost the color on her face.

"Seth, do you ever wonder why I forgave Sam after what he did to me?" Emily's words took me by surprise; I knew she never talked about the incident.

"Yes Emily, many times" I admitted

"I never wanted you or anybody for that matter, to know what happened between Sam and me. But after Jacob imprinted on you and started following you around like you were in heat, it was necessary for you see everything. That's why I insisted that Sam tell you and I wouldn't back down". I could detect some hesitance in her voice; it was painfully obvious she felt very uncomfortable talking about this.

"Sam never wanted you to know, he didn't want you to change your perception of him, to see him any different than you had all your life. But he also knew that you needed to see how it felt, how an alpha experienced an imprinting, the animalistic nature of it". I was truly dumfounded.

"I will never forget that day, the way Sam looked at me, it was like he was a predator and I was his prey. I didn't know how true that statement was until later." She took a deep breath and squeezed my hand, but this time it was not to comfort me, but to comfort herself.

"I was very afraid, but didn't want to show it, I tried to put up a brave front, but inside I was shaking. Sam was acting really weird touching my face and calling me beautiful. I would have been flattered if not for the fact that I was so scared and had the gut feeling that something was wrong". I grabbed one of her hands and noticed she was shaking, I started rubbing circles with my thumb on the back of her hand trying to help her calm down.

"I tried to pull away from him and ...that was the first time I saw him," she stopped talking and turned her face to look at the ocean, while trying to hold back the tears that were pooling in her dark eyes.

"Who did you see Emily?" I asked perplexed and curious about the whole story.

"His wolf, the monster inside him." As she said this, tears started falling down her cheeks, even after all this time, the memories of the fear and the pain she felt affect her in a way nobody would ever begin to understand.

"Sam's eyes were pitch black and he stared at me lustfully and angry. Then he said the most horrible words I've ever heard in my entire life. _I'm going to fuck you, hard._ It was Sam's voice but it was not him in charge, he had lost himself completely, there was no Sam, only wolf."

"He didn't care about me; his only focus was his pleasure. I begged him Seth, I pleaded, I told him I was a virgin trying to gain his pity, but nothing worked. He just savagely raped me, it hurt so much, you have no idea." I cringed as the image of Sam hurting Emily came to my mind. Her whole body was shaking and the sobs drowned her words, tears falling in the sand as big droplets. I let go of her hand and placed my arm on her shoulders, gently pulling her towards me.

"My body and my soul were hurting during his vicious attack. I'm grateful that I lost consciousness; when I woke up I tried to escape, he lost control and I have the scar to show for it." She took a few minutes to calm down and get her breathing under control, her body was still shaking slightly, but she had more control of her emotions. She was relieving the most traumatic experience of her life and she was doing it for me. I don't know the reasoning behind torturing herself with these horrible memories, but she must feel strongly that I need to know this, I just don't understand why.

"He took me to your house and your parents tried to reason with me, explaining that it was not his fault, that his wolf twisted his thoughts into thinking that he had the right to do what he did." She rushed through this last segment it was like she feared that she wouldn't be able to finish, I just listened to her, respecting how difficult it must be for her to talk about the whole episode.

Several minutes passed and Emily remained silent, I had to ask her the question that's been plaguing me since I learned of my brother's crime.

"How where you able to forgive him?"

"It was very hard, at first I didn't want anything to do with him, and I refused to speak to anybody, just wallowed in a world of self-pity and anger. I was sinking deeper into depression with each passing day. It was physically and emotionally painful to reject him; my only consolation was that I knew he felt ten times worse than I did. Seth, nothing hurts more to an imprinted wolf than when he is rejected by his mate, in some instances it can even kill him"

"I was correct; he was suffering ten times more than I was. He was physically ill, nightmares plagued the few hours he was able to sleep, food didn't appeal to him at all and he was wasting away because of the rejection and the guilt. At that moment, I saw him, the real Sam, the one that you grew up with Seth. The strong kind-hearted man, he was broken, ashamed. He felt guilty and disgusted at his own actions. His life was pure torture, the wolf kept pestering him trying to get him to take me again, by force if necessary".

"It was like Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde, same person two personalities. When the real Sam was present he was gentle, respectful and understanding, he wouldn't even look at me in the eye because he was so ashamed."

"When the wolf was in control it was a different story he was brutal, inconsiderate, possessive and demeaning. Thank goodness Sam learned that he needed to leave my side when he felt he was starting to lose control. With time he has gained enough control, that he doesn't have to leave my side, he can will his wolf to calm down" she breathed a sight of relief.

"As time passed I got to know the real Sam, I hated his wolf with my heart and my soul, but I couldn't bring myself to hate Sam. When I looked in his eyes I saw so much regret, shame and sadness. But in those beautiful brown orbs I also saw so much love. His purpose in life was to make me happy and all his actions were directed towards this. If I gave him just a little smile his heart would soar."

"And there was also Jacob; he played a big part at getting me to understand Sam. Jacob had known Sam for several years and felt he knew him fairly well. He has always been mature for his age, I guess having the responsibility of having to take care of his father made him grow up fast and even though he was only a kid he tried to help me. Of course he never knew exactly what happened, he was not even a wolf back then, he only knew that Sam was in love with a girl that didn't love him back".

"Jacob talked to me many times; telling me stories and helping me get to know the real Sam. He had so many funny anecdotes that showed me a very human Sam, not the monster I had the displeasure of knowing. He helped Sam with ideas on how to romance me. Just so you know, Jacob is very romantic. Under that tough exterior lies a hearth of gold, he even went as far as giving Sam some of the money he was saving to buy a car to buy me presents." I knew that at some point during our conversation the name of that asshole was going to make an appearance. What do I care if Jacob is romantic, he doesn't want to give me flowers or write me a poem, he only wants to fuck me, all he wants from me is my ass.

I let go of her hands and stiffened next to Emily, why did she have to mention Jacob? Just hearing his name makes me sick to my stomach. She sensed my change in attitude and placed a long delicate arm around me, she was the one comforting me now.

"Sam used to say that he had to woo me and in a way it's true, he crept into my heart little by little. And if you let your defenses down, Jacob will creep into your heart Seth. You've probably heard this before, but nobody can resist that level of commitment." Emily chuckled at her own comment. I didn't reply, I could feel the anger already boiling deep inside me. The idea of allowing myself to fall in love with a rapist seem completely impossible to me. Maybe Emily was able to forgive Sam, but I will never forgive Jacob, even if it kills us both.

"So, to answer the question of how I was able to forgive Sam I have to tell you that it was not automatic. It was not like an aha! moment, I did not wake up one day and decided to forgive him. It took me a long time to forgive him but even longer to trust him. Luckily I was able to see the real person standing in front of me, the man that was desperately in love with me. The man that got on his knees and begged for my forgiveness" she whimpered as a few tears fell from her eyes.

I was in shock at this statement, my brother on his knees begging, never in a million years I would have thought he will do something like that.

"I never forgave his wolf, I accepted him, since it's is a big part of Sam, but I never granted him my forgiveness. I forgave Sam, he regretted his actions and I knew he was sincere. He had several occasions in which he almost succumbed to the wolf and attacked me again but was able to stay in control. He had to learn to manage his wolf so it wouldn't dominate him, if he failed to accomplish this I would never accept him." When she finished saying this she wiped a few tears from her face.

"Emily I don't know what to say, I'm sorry and feel ashamed for my family for what my brother did to you." I was flabbergasted; words escaped me at the realization of the intensity of Emily's love towards my brother.

"You have to be the most kind- hearted person in the world. The fact that you were able to forgive Sam shows your great capacity for love. I wish that one day I would be able to love somebody with at least half the intensity you love him." I said sincerely.

"Seth you don't realize the great potential you possess, you are capable of a love so deep that I could only dream of. You are strong and passionate when you really believe in something. But you have to let go of all the hate and resentment. Those feelings take up so much of your heart, that they barely leave any space for anything else." She said this while looking intently into my eyes, trying to find understanding in them. I just nodded acknowledging that she said something but not completely agreeing.

"What's with you, Clearwaters? I've never seen anybody more stubborn." I had to laugh, I, Seth Clearwater achieved the unthinkable, I managed to make Emily lose her cool.

"Sorry Emily, I didn't mean to get you upset, but I can't help the way I am."

"Please Seth, that's bullshit" now this took me by surprise, I've only heard Emily swear in very few occasions, she must really be upset with me.

"Your own words condemn you Seth. If you admit that you can't help yourself and that's why you have such a negative attitude, you are also admitting that if Jacob returns and claims you on the spot, you have to accept it because he can't help himself." I reacted immediately feeling my whole body tensing after her accusation.

"Is not the same Emily". I stood up trying to put some distance between us, I was livid at her for even suggesting that the situations where similar. Even if I had the worse attitude in the universe, it would never hurt Jacob the way he is going to hurt me. From the corner of my eye I saw Emily stand up and walk towards me, grabbing me roughly by the arm and making me turn to face her.

"How so, explain to me how it is different, because from where I'm standing all I can see is a freaking double standard" her usual silvery voice substituted for a taut voice and a severe expression.

I was speechless; I couldn't provide an explanation and that made me angry. Emily wrapped her arms around me, laying her head on my shoulder.

We stayed in our embrace for an undetermined amount of time. Facing the ocean without seeing it, we allowed the light breeze to caress our skin; it felt especially good over my overheated body. We remained silent, Emily's logic burying itself into my mind. I'm the one that needs to change, hmmm, interesting concept, not very practical in my opinion.

I lift my gaze to look at Emily who is just lost in thought, her gaze towards the line where the ocean meets the sky.

How can she or anybody else, expect me to accept all the shit that is being flung at me?

"About time" I was sitting on our huge bed in my pajama bottoms, arms crossed over my chest and bored out of my mind.

"What the fuck? What has your panties in a bunch Seth?"

"Nothing"

"So, this is how it's going to be, you won't even give me the courtesy of a complete sentence." Jacob tried to sound indignant, but I could tell he was amused with my childish antics.

"Nope". I said making a popping sound with the p.

I wouldn't dare look at him; I knew that if I did, I would lose all my resolve. I could already feel the heat that radiated from his body filling the room, his intoxicating scent making my head swirl with thoughts of being pinned under his body screaming his name.

Jacob approached the bed slowly, I'm sure he could hear my heart pick up the moment he came in the room, now it was beating even faster as I felt him getting closer. He kneeled beside the bed stretching his arm to touch my thigh, I flinched away from him. Without looking at him I knew the frown that was forming on his gorgeous face, there are only a few things more painful to an imprinted wolf than being rejected by your mate.

"Seth, baby you knew that after work I had patrol, I came home as soon as my shift was over, just took a few minutes for a quick shower". Jacob whined, shit that whining drives me insane, so fucking sexy.

"Fine, let's go to sleep". I said angrily.

Faster than I could register the bed dipped and Jake situated himself on all fours over my body. He was straddling my hips and attacked my neck nibbling and kissing the tender flesh there. I was desperately trying to keep my resolve and not moan, but it felt so damn good.

I locked eyes with Jake for just a fraction of a second but that was enough to see that they were almost black except some hints of brown in them, as the lust inside him was quickly increasing. I also felt his need to please me, to make up for his absence.

I needed this; I needed to feel close to him, to feel him inside me making us one being. But I was still pissed at Jake for making me wait all day for him. A horny Seth is a cranky Seth.

Jake moved his lips to mine kissing me roughly, possessively dominating my mouth. Since I was not granting him entrance he bit my bottom lip, when I gasped he slid his tongue in my anxious mouth. He chuckled darkly, his hot moist breath going across my face.

"Puppy you taste so good" He moaned against my mouth.

He always says that same line, I remember how much I used to hate it, but now I absolutely love it.

The scent of his arousal hit me and I felt my whole body coming to life. Just his scent can make my whole body shiver in need and desperation.

He stretched his legs achieving to lay flat over me, holding himself up with his elbows, making sure not to put all his weight on me. Our naked chests were touching; I ran my fingers over his biceps feeling the strength and raw power contained in those muscles. I heard him chuckle as he felt my hard-on through the thin fabric of my pants.

"I thought you were angry and just wanted to sleep? He asked clearly amused with my predicament.

"Just shut up Jake". I said before biting his ear playfully.

I closed my eyes as he trailed his lips over my jaw and down my neck only stopping to gently nibble my Adam's apple. He was barely touching me with his lips, torturing me, the gentle caress of his lips making me moan in wanton.

He moved to the spot between my neck and my shoulder, where in that first time making love he placed his mating mark. He sucked on the mark that I proudly wear on my skin. It is the only mark I have in my whole body making it stand out even more; it is a constant reminder of my status as Jacob's mate.

"Mine". Whispered Jacob against my neck

"Yes love, yours"

Those words woke up the beast in him, there was a growl and he bit me again making me scream. He lapped the few drops of blood and sucked gently until my fast healing kicked in.

Jacob proceeded to kiss every inch of my body, starting with my chest where he sucked my hard nipples one at a time while pinching the other with his fingers. He licked every hill and valley on my stomach.

His mouth kept going painfully slow down my body. In one swift motion he took off my pants revealing my rock hard cock, glistening with a pearl of pre-cum spilling from the tip.

I looked up and saw Jacob staring down at me.

"So beautiful, my Seth"

Jake leaned down licking his lips, a loud moan escaped my lips when I felt his tongue going up and down my length; he wrapped his perfect lips around my length taking it into his warm moist cave. He sucked hard moaning in pleasure as he tasted my pre cum.

He rubbed his hands against my inner things gently massaging my sweet spot.

"Ahhhhhh just like that Jakey". He smirked proudly, as he was able to make those moans come out of me; he knew how intense was the combined sensation of him rubbing my legs while sucking me. My perfect mate knew every inch of my body and how to give me pleasure.

I whined when his mouth left my swollen member that demanded attention. But I was soon pacified when I felt him lick that magical spot on my left leg while pumping my cock slowly.

Not wanting to be selfish I grab Jacobs's meat pole, I gasp when I feel the length and thickness of his cock. Even after all this time I still marvel at the perfection that it is. Nine inches of heaven, so thick that I'm not able to wrap my fist around it. Jacob slaps my hand away, even though he has changed a lot from his domineering possessive ways, in bed Jake likes to take charge and I don't mind, I love it.

"Don't worry about me baby, I owe you for making you wait and anyway I'll have all my pleasure when I fuck that delicious ass of yours. When I'm deep inside you feeling your warmth all around me, you know how much I like to feel you stretch while I enter you, mmm baby I want you so much".

I shuddered, as the thoughts of Jacob balls-deep inside me, ran through my head.

"Jakey, take me now"

"What do you want me to do pup?"

"Fuck me already". I said my voice husky and demanding.

"Beg".

"Never".

"Submit". Jacob said this while pulling my hair gently, enough to make me bare my neck in submission, but not hurting me. He attacked my neck sucking on my mating mark while rolling one of my nipples between his thumb and his middle finger.

"Hell no". I barely managed to say the words.

"Then I wont give you any of this" He took my hand and placed it on his stiff cock, I could feel he was rock hard, throbbing and leaking pre-cum. Letting go of my hand Jacob ran his hands down my sides grabbing my hips and rubbing himself on my painfully hard cock. That did it, I couldn't wait any more and I needed to be fucked now. All my resolve and my pride flew out the window because of my intense need for Jake.

"Please".

"I can't hear you . . ." he whispered in a sing-sung voice.

"Please mate, master". I was whimpering and begging but I didn't care, in my mind there was no space for pride, only lust.

Jacob didn't need any more encouragement; his need was overwhelming him as well. On the background I heard the distinct sound of the condom wrapper and the popping sound when he opened the tube of lube. I watched him as he placed the condom on his length coating it with lube. I licked my lips engrossed on the image in front of my eyes.

He wrapped my left leg around his waist propping my ass slightly off the bed. Expertly finding my sweet spot again he started massaging it while he introduced one lube covered finger in my tight hole. It felt heavenly; at last I will get the relief I desperately need. He added a second finger and this made me gasp, he noticed and increased his caressing alternating between my sweet spot and jerking my cock teasingly. He was scissoring me now, stretching me, getting me ready for a much bigger invader.

He pushed his fingers in and out and added a third finger. He kept going faster and faster, in and out, hitting that wonderful bundle of nerves inside me that made me throw back my head and scream.

"Jacob".

He removed his fingers and placed the tip of his cock on my entrance; I wiggled my hips and pulled him towards me trying to push him inside me. He held my hips down not wanting to grant any dominance.

"Stay still, I'm in control, understand?" Said Jacob sternly, but straining to get the words out.

"Yes master, I'm sorry".

"I think you need to be punished for your insolence", he smirked.

He entered me forcibly impaling me with all nine inches. It hurt, not a lot, but enough to make the air come out of my lungs. He stopped, watching me, concern evident in his features. He waited for me to get accustomed to his size while rubbing my sweet spot.

A moan escaped my lips and that was his signal to start thrusting in and out. He pulled out almost completely and slammed it in.

"Jacob". He hit that spot inside me again.

"Just like that, say your dominant's name".

"Jacob".

His pace was quickening, so fast that a normal human being wouldn't be able to handle it. I felt my release approaching and begged to be touched.

"Please Jakey, baby, touch me, I'm close"

"I can feel it Seth, you are squeezing me so good"

"Jake, Jake, Jake". I kept repeating his name as my brain was filled with him, he was stimulating all my senses and my whole body was responding to him.

Jacob kept pumping my aching member and slamming into my prostate.

"Seth, shit, so tight" he was gasping and tensing.

My whole body tensed as I came hard covering his hand and my chest with my release. I tightened my grip on his cock and that sent Jake over the edge and he came screaming my name.

"Seth!"

I was panting and covered in sweat and cum. Jake was still over me panting, trying to catch his breath after the intense workout. I felt him starting to deflate inside me; he pulled out and lay beside me pulling me to his chest.

My whole body was still shaking after my release, Jakes arms trembling as he surrounded me in the safe cocoon of his arms.

The air in the room was thick with the smell of sex; I closed my eyes again reveling on his warmth, my heartbeat and breathing slowing down. I snuggled to his side and he placed one of his legs over mine. Feeling safe in his arms I allowed sleep to take me_. _

My eyes snapped open as the sunlight coming through the thin fabric of my curtains hit my face. I groaned and covered my face with my pillow.

What the fuck was that, I was angry with myself, why am I dreaming about being fucked by Jacob? I huffed into the pillow.

I gasped at the memory of the dream that my subconscious attacked me with. Shock filled my mind as I ask myself so many questions. I growled in frustration, feeling like I was loosing control fast, going down a path from which there was no turning back.

I didn't want to think about this anymore, denial is a great tool for stubborn assholes like me. I swung my legs over to the side of the bed and felt something in my pants. My crotch felt wet and sticky and it was then when I realized I came while sleeping, probably propelled by the dream.

Oh great, just what I needed, proof of my shame.

I ran to the bathroom making a mental note to do my own laundry this week. I finished my shower quickly and brushed my teeth. Out of habit I peeked out the door before making a beeline to my bedroom. I still felt like at any moment I'll find Jacob waiting for me in the hallway, his arms crossed over his chest and an indescribable look of lust adorning his face.

There is no rush to get dressed, I put on my boxers and sit on my bed feeling defeated. My birthday is only three days away, with each passing day I feel angrier, frustrated, and I have to admit it, very scared. My life is ending, like a death row inmate I'm just waiting for the day when death will claim me.

I welcomed, without much enthusiasm, the end of the school year; thanks to my total lack of social life I was able to get straight A's. All the teachers were praising me on my achievements, little they knew that I was using school, to escape for a few hours, from the living hell that is my life. At least now I will rest from the constant stares, gossip and giggling whenever I walked through any of the hallways in our small school.

Slowly the pack began to interact with me again, still none of them dared to get close to me; even in his absence they still fear the rage of their alpha. Quil visits me every once in a while, he is still hurting because of Paul and the idiot has no clue of how he is affecting poor Quil, especially when he starts making out with Leah. Those two and their public displays of affection make everybody groan in disgust and poor Quil throws up a little in his mouth every time he sees them.

Kim called me on the phone several times, it made me happy to have my old friend back even if she is still a shallow teenage girl too preoccupied with fashion, she is my friend. Each time our conversation was light and easy, it's easy to talk to Kim, she is not that hard to figure out and she is not playing games. She is head over heels for Jared and deep down, I'm happy for them. On the surface, I'm pissed off, but it's not their fault. I could've been the one to imprint on Kim and dedicate my life to her, walking around with a stupid grin on my face all the time. It's just hard for me to process all this crap.

I met the new wolf, Brady, he seems nice enough. I feel bad for him, because he is not allowed to talk to Collin who has been his best friend since they were in kindergarten. At least he is not a freak like yours truly, he may have lost his friend for a while, but when he learns to be in control he will be allowed to speak to him again, until then he feels lonely, that's something I can understand, loneliness.

The dull pain on my chest hits me again and brings me back to the real world. Shit when is this fucking pain going away? I can swear it feels worse every day. And then there are the dreams...

I've been dreaming about Jacob every night for the last few weeks it's embarrassing and disgusting. It's like I'm looking in his head and relive very disgusting scene he has been playing in his mind since the day he imprinted on me. They are all pretty much the same, usually it's him fucking me anywhere, the shower, the forest, the bedroom, the kitchen table... ugh, the worst part is that in each dream I'm enjoying being bent over a table and fucked in the ass. In every dream I'm submitting to him willingly.

My eyes widen as images from the dream I had last night suddenly rush into my head so intense, so overwhelming, and so corrupting. I look down and see the tent that has formed on my boxers, shit I'm sick that's the only logical explanation I can come up with. I grab my erection through my boxers and try to choke the life out it, my only intention to hide the shame I feel because of my reaction to the memory of the dream.

I try to sort through the maze of images in my mind trying to regain my sanity. I need to think clearly, right now I feel like my mind is filled with cotton and I can't think straight. Could I escape? Do I want to escape?

I can't escape the inevitable; I have to face my reality, just three days...

**I consider this chapter the calm before the storm. Those of you who read the story when it was originally written would remember that Emily was not going to explain how she forgave Sam. I felt it was necessary and important for the flow of the story that those reasons were explained. **

**All the readers are cordially invited to Seth's birthday party in the next chapter, don't miss it...**


	19. Chapter 19 It's my party amd I'll cry

**A big thank you to everybody who added the story to their alerts, favorite story or favorite author. I'm especially grateful to those of you who wrote me reviews, you have no idea how much it means to me when I read your comments.**

**Warning: This chapter will contain violence and abuse, if you are sensitive to these subjects please consider refraining from reading it.**

**I don't own any of the characters, Stephenie Meyer created them, I only use them to please my over active imagination.**

Chapter 19 It's my party and I'll cry if I want to

"Happy birthday squirt!" The unnaturally cheery voice of Leah hit me like a hammer to the head. I opened my eyes to see Sam, Emily and Leah watching me, they were smiling but they couldn't fool me, their smiles didn't reach their eyes. Behind their smiles I could sense different emotions; I could see those emotions in their eyes. In Sam's eyes I saw concern, what a hypocrite! Now he is concerned? after he handed Jacob my ass in a silver platter. I'm still royally pissed at my brother, barely speaking to him in the past three weeks.

In Emily's eyes I saw compassion, of all the people in the world she is the only one that has an idea of what I'll have to go through today. She is the only one who understands my pain and the impending sense of doom. In her case the rape happened so soon after Sam announced his intentions that she didn't have a lot of time to be afraid of what was coming. In my case it's been months of torture, counting the days to my demise.

Leah's eyes were a little bit harder to read, like she was trying to hide her real feelings. We are all used to her always putting out a bitchy vibe, no censorship on her thoughts or on her words. I guess that comes with the territory when you are the only female in a pack of young wolves. But her eyes were dripping with venom because of the anger brewing in her soul. Hopefully today she will be in my corner, not that it will do much good, since we are at the mercy of a sadistic alpha who knows that with just one word she will abandon me, with one word he can sever the ties that bind me to my family and the protection they provide.

"Guys, it's too early for this shit and I'm not really in a celebratory mood if you haven't noticed." I didn't mean to put a damper in their effort, but they should know better. Are they in fucking denial? I have nothing to celebrate and they need to understand this.

"We don't care squirt, today is all about you, whether you like it or not". Leah's words sounded cheery, but felt strained.

"We are starting with breakfast in bed for the birthday boy". Said Emily. That actually sounded really good, I haven't been eating much lately due to a serious lack of appetite, something unheard of in a wolf, but I am not a normal wolf anyway, I guess the same rules don't apply to us freaks. She prepared my favorites, a chocoholic's dream; chocolate chip pancakes, scrambled eggs, bacon, chocolate muffin and hot cocoa with little marshmallows and lots of whipped cream. The three of them just watched me in fascination while I ate everything that Emily placed in front of me. Now that I think about it, death row inmates get a last meal, maybe this was mine.

"Glad to see you got your appetite back, little brother". Sam chimed in; I glared at him with an intensity that I thought would make him burst into flames.

"Don't little brother me, asshole". I looked directly into my brother's eyes trying to make him see what his lack of backbone was doing to me. I'm sure that if our father was alive, even without being a wolf, he would've put Jacob in his place.

"Seth, that is not really necessary, don't you think? It was Emily's voice; I didn't look at her not wanting to look away from my brother. I could never say anything hurtful to Emily, so out of respect and love I didn't answer her question.

Not able to hold my gaze any longer Sam looked away from me and sat at the foot of my bed, looking defeated. I can honestly say I don't hate Sam, just like Emily no matter how hard it try I can't bring myself to hate him. Right now I feel disappointed, betrayed and angry all this feelings directed towards Sam, since the real cause of my sorrow is not around, at least not yet.

"When is Jacob coming to get me?" I asked surprisingly calm as I slurped the remaining cocoa. "Not that I'm looking forward to it, but I'll like to know" I didn't recognize my own voice it sounded empty. Now that I think about it, I am empty, I'm nothing but the empty shell of what one day was Seth Clearwater. I've always been cynical and sarcastic but at least I had spirit, now I don't really give a damn about anything.

"We don't know Seth, but please don't think about that, try to enjoy your day. You're sixteen today, you can get a learner's permit and learn to drive and you can get one of these." My brother is kind of overdoing it, he should give it a rest, is not working. If he thinks that with a rehearsed monologue he can make me change the way I feel, he is completely wrong, this is not a fucking Hallmark special.

Sam gave me a box wrapped in blue paper with balloons on it, I took it and looked at it pondering if I should open it or smash on the wall. I decided on the first one, I'm not going to allow that monster to take away my last few simple pleasures before the world of pain begins. I opened the box and inside I found a brand new cell phone.

It would've been funny if it wasn't so tragic I'm going to turn sixteen, get a new cell phone and get raped all in a period of twenty- four hours, just peachy.

_"_That is from Emily and me, we got one of those family plans so you have unlimited texting and free mobile to mobile calls. You'll be able to contact us anytime and anywhere." Aha, like I want to talk to you, asshole.

"Thank you guys". They knew how much I wanted a cell phone, but I couldn't help thinking that I probably won't be allowed to use it. I'll need Jacob's permission to call my own family. God I hate my life.

"You don't like it Seth? Noticing my less than enthusiastic attitude to my birthday present Emily intervened.

"You know we can take you to the store and you can get a different one." Emily also sat on the bed, but she sat next to me, I guess she was trying to infuse me with some of her positive energy.

"Is not that, Emily, I really like it, shit I love it. I don't want to seem ungrateful but the fact of the matter is that I don't think there is anything that will make me happy today. Everything reminds me of you know what, and you know who. Looking at the phone I wonder if I'll be allowed to use it, if I'll be granted permission to call my own family."

"He will not dare mess with us that way Seth, we'll always be your family and we'll talk to you anytime we want, we'll see you anytime we want." Leah was shaking and her fists were so tight her knuckles looked white.

"You don't know that for sure Leah; remember that he'll be at his mercy, as his submissive. He is expected to obey his dominate in everything and Jacob thinks he has the right to punish Seth, any way he may see fit, if he doesn't do as he says." Listening to Sam explain my situation I can already feel the all too familiar burning in my eyes as tears start to form.

"Seth, it will be alright" Emily lifted my chin to make me look at her. "Seth, do you remember our conversation on the beach? Hopefully your situation won't be worse than mine was and look at us now, we couldn't be happier." She extended her arm to grab Sam's hand looking at him lovingly; he grabbed her hand with an intense look of adoration.

"It will be hard and will take time, patience, understanding and forgiveness, but if you ever want to be happy you'll have to let your defenses down. All I can tell you is that it will be ok, you'll survive this, you are stronger than you think, stop acting like a victim." She was emphatic, looking directly into my eyes; this is the second time Emily speaks to me with this authority. She is not afraid to speak her mind and I love her for it.

"But Emily, today Jacob is coming to get me; today he is going to rape me!" I couldn't contain my anger any longer and I let it spill in an avalanche of curses, hate, anger and tears. Immediately Emily hugged me tight, holding me while I screamed and cried. Leah also came to my help; climbing on the other side of the bed, she also put her arms around me. It was like they feared I was going to literally fall apart and they needed to hold me tight and keep me together. Sam was like a statue at the bottom of my bed; he didn't move, he didn't say anything; he just watched the scene unfolding in front of him, but then again, whenever Sam is furious he puts on a mask that only those of us who know him can identify and today, he is beyond furious.

The hours passed slowly as Leah took me from store to store trying to find a shell for my new phone and some new clothes for the party. I knew she was given the task of keeping me out of the house while Emily and Sam prepared everything for the party they insisted on having, even though I asked them not to. I really didn't want to have a party; I didn't want to see any of the members of the pack. All I wanted was curl up into a ball and die.

Leah made me change my clothes at the same store where a I bought them, I've never done that before and it felt really weird, like I was stealing them or something, even though she paid for everything.

It was already dusk when we got back to the house, when I got out of the car I froze on the spot thinking of who might be waiting for me. I sniffed the air trying to find his scent, the scent that is now so different than it used to, moss and wildflowers. I breathed a sigh of relief at the confirmation that his scent was nowhere around the house. I felt the corners of my mouth forming a slight smile, maybe he is not coming after all, could it be?

Leah guided me to the backyard and an avalanche of congratulations, best wishes, pats in the back and some shy quick hugs blanket me. Everybody from the pack was there. Kim was the first one to approach me, followed closely by Jared, she gave me a hug and Jared did the same.

"So tell me Seth how does it feel to be sixteen years old?" Kim sounded really stupid, damn it she is sixteen too, she already knows how it feels, the only difference is that today my life as I've known it was going to end, while hers is just starting. I couldn't help but laugh bitterly but she didn't quite catch my mood and laughed with me. She didn't mind that I laughed at her, that was another thing that Kim and I where really good at, laughing at each other.

Paul approached me shyly, Leah moved to his side like she was trying to make sure he didn't say anything stupid. Good luck with that.

"Happy Birthday Seth" was all Paul said dryly; I didn't even give him the courtesy of looking at him. I couldn't, if I did I would jump on him and before he gets a chance to react I'll rip his miserable throat out.

"Fuck you Paul". I spat at him and walked away, with the corner of my eye I saw Leah holding him and giving him a warning look. I don't even know what the fuck he is doing here, I hate him and this is supposed to be my party, weren't they supposed to invite only my friends?

I looked around and noticed that Emily outdid herself, there were balloons tied to every chair, on the back wall I could see a big banner that read Happy Birthday Seth. There were several torches on the periphery, they added a nice dim light and kept the bugs away. She even put multicolor Christmas lights on some of the bushes around house. There was pizza, chips, soda, candy and a huge chocolate cake with a big number sixteen on top.

To an outsider everything would look perfect, just like any normal birthday party for a teenage boy turning sixteen. But I knew better, I could read the vibe of our backyard, the unease that dominated everybody was palpable. Everybody was tense and kept looking over their shoulder at any little sound. Sam kept glancing towards the forest, I'm sure he knows what time that bastard is getting here but he won't tell me.

Everybody settled into various conversations among small groups. All of them tried to include me in their conversations and I enjoyed some of them, but I wasn't into it, I had this terrible feeling in the pit of my stomach and couldn't help but shudder in fear and worry.

I decided to go to the kitchen, I needed to get away for a minute, I sat on one of the kitchen chairs, sipping a soda and laughing at myself when I burped loudly. Some time passed before Quil came running into the kitchen, scaring the shit out of me, "C'mon Seth, we are going to play some football."

"Quil man I really don't feel like it". I couldn't finish, Quil grabbed me by the wrist and pulled me off the chair almost making me spill my soda all over myself, thankfully I do have good reflexes and caught it in time.

"Who's playing?" I asked not really caring but curious of why we are having a game of football during a birthday party. Well what do you expect? We are all weirdoes anyway.

"Everybody, even Emily and Kim!" Answered Jared with a mix of amusement and worry on his voice. I looked at Sam who had his arm around Emily's waist looking worried. They had good reason to worry, the guys were not known for holding back during their games, they are all very competitive and if you combine that with the fact that they are freakishly strong and heal fast you have the recipe for a very wild game.

"Let's split up into teams". Announced Paul

I was in the same team as Sam, Emily, Embry and Quil. The game started and without even realizing it, I started having fun. What I lacked in strength I made up in speed and because of that, my team was winning. Everybody tried to tackle me, not afraid of touching me, made me feel good, almost normal. I even tried to take a few swings at Paul and caught him in the eye once, I didn't inflict much damage and I'm sure it will be healed before the game ended but it felt good to hit him. Even if he got angry and beat the crap out of me, it will still be worth it.

I laughed my head off watching Sam and Jared act as human shields for Emily and Kim, I'm sure they couldn't wait for the game to be over. I was laughing so hard I had to stop and ask for time, I haven't laughed in a long time and it felt good to do it.

By the time Sam announced our team as the winner and we were done bragging and gloating it was almost 10:00 pm. We were all covered in dirt, even Emily had dirt, grass and leaves in her beautiful raven hair, but nobody cared, we had too much fun. Sam announced we were going to sing happy birthday at exactly 10:20.

We have a tradition in my family in which we sing happy birthday at exactly the time the person was born, in my case twenty past ten. My mom started that tradition for Sam's first birthday and we try to continue it, as a small tribute to her.

I blew my candles and there was another round of congratulations and hugs. I had a huge piece of cake and I swear I've never eaten anything so good, it tasted even better with vanilla ice cream.

Everybody pitched in with cleanup and in no time there was no evidence in our backyard that a party happened there. One by one everybody started saying goodbye, repeating their congratulations and birthday wishes.

The only ones left were my family and Paul who was stuck to Leah's side like a fucking parasite. We all went into the kitchen and Leah reminded me that I hadn't opened my presents yet. I opened each one of them; almost everybody got me clothes, which I was very grateful for, because my closet was looking very old and empty.

The only presents left were a heavy medium size box and a small rectangular one that Leah insisted I had to open last. I was very curious, I tear the wrapping paper of the heavy box to see what it was; I couldn't believe my eyes when I saw it was a brand new laptop. I wanted one for a long time, thinking it would be very helpful with schoolwork. Not having to go to the library, to use the computers there every time I had a special project, would be awesome. But I wouldn't dare ask for one since I knew that it was way beyond our means, I was so excited I kept jumping up and down, I must have looked like Tigger from Winnie the Pooh.

"Seth you still have one more, open it". Leah had to remind me because the sight of my new computer made me forget about all my other presents.

"Sorry guys I'm just too excited!". I felt honestly happy. The day had not been half bad, I had lots of fun in my birthday party, especially when I consider the fact I didn't even want one, this is fantastic.

"I know shorty; that one is from Paul and me" said Leah with a huge smile on her face.

I unwrapped it to reveal a brand new iPod with a $50 I-tunes card; shit did my family win the lottery and didn't tell me? I jumped towards Leah wrapping my arms around her giving her a tight hug. With a nod I thanked Paul for his contribution and hugged Sam and Emily.

"Guys, thank you for everything, the party was great, my presents are awesome, thank you really". I stopped when the clock on the kitchen wall caught my attention, it read 12:47, my birthday had officially ended 47 minutes ago. It made me sad because regardless of my circumstances, I did have a great day. But I smiled at the realization that my birthday passed and Jacob didn't come, maybe he changed his mind and was going to stay away forever, maybe my luck was changing after all.

"Emily can I have another piece of cake please?" I felt I needed to keep celebrating.

"Sure Seth, I made it especially for you". She placed a second piece of cake in a plate and topped it with vanilla ice cream.

The five of us stayed in the kitchen and I could see everybody was visibly more relaxed, we were chatting about the party and the game. Sam confirmed what I suspected; he was terrified of Emily playing football with us, but agreed because I looked so somber they needed to do something to cheer me up.

I ate my second huge piece of cake of the night enjoying it while trying to figure out the instructions for the laptop. When I finished with my cake I stood up to rinse the plate and suddenly the room became eerily quiet. Before I could react, a pair of massive warm arms surrounded me.

"Happy birthday baby". It was Jacob's voice whispering in my ear

He spun me around and claimed my lips kissing me roughly, possessively. He had one hand behind my neck pushing my face towards him, while the other hand was around my waist pulling me against him. He licked my bottom lip and tried to push his tongue inside, but I pressed my lips together, he bit my lip hard enough that he drew blood making me open my mouth in the process. Jacob pushed his tongue inside my mouth and started swirling it around, I wouldn't respond; I just stood there like a rag doll. It felt so dirty, so disgusting, made me gag but he didn't care, he continued violating my mouth, this attack just a mild version of what was going to happen later.

OH SHIT, the big bad wolf is back! Was all I could think at that moment.

"Seth your mouth tastes so good, like the cake you just ate mixed with your own chocolate flavor, God I missed you so much." His voice was muffled by his lips pressing into mine.

He pulled back slowly to look into my eyes and I felt my whole body tremble with horror, when I stared into his eyes, that's when I saw it... I could see his wolf in his black eyes, looking at me, mocking me. I saw exactly what Emily saw that fateful day, the monster inside him, completely in control. At this moment the wolf was the puppeteer and Jacob was his puppet, he was holding the strings that controlled all of his actions, there was no Jacob, it was his face and his body, but his mind and soul were all wolf.

I panicked; I couldn't control my body, the spasms and rough shaking dominating me. I couldn't believe it, the bastard waited, giving me false hope that he was not going to come, but of course he couldn't stay away. My executioner, the psychopath, my rapist was right in front of me. Jacob was going to take me away from my home and my family; he was going to cripple my life.

"NOOOOOOOO get away from me!" I yelled at the top of my lungs, breaking the silence that permeated in the kitchen. My scream took him by surprise and gave me a chance to get out of the hold he had on me and run towards the back door. I knew it was futile, that even if I managed to get away he would follow my scent and find me, but I had to try.

"Where the hell do you think you are going?" Jacob grabbed me by the back of the neck and slammed me hard on the wall. Placing both hands on my back he pushed me against the wall, if he pushed any harder he would've cracked a few of my ribs.

"Seth, today is your birthday... wait, let me correct that, yesterday was your birthday. The deal was I was going to wait until you turned sixteen. Today you WILL be mine, all mine, your mouth will be mine, your cock will be mine, and your ass will be mine, even each and every breath you take will be mine." He had a predatory quality to his voice, with the corner of my eye I saw that even his stance resembled that of an animal getting ready for the kill, savoring the moment before decimating its prey.

He got even closer to me, rubbing his very evident hard-on against my ass. He snaked one of his arms around me and grabbed my crotch humming as he molested me.

"I'm going to pound you into my sheets; I'm going to mount you so many times you won't be able to walk when I'm done with you. I'll fuck you again and again and again, you owe me three fucking months and you are going to pay, bitch. You will be all mine and only mine... forever." He whispered menacingly into my ear while he continued grinding his erection on my back.

"I will NEVER be yours Jacob; you are nothing, but a filthy, abusive, SON OF A BITCH!" Before I could savor the effect of my words he turned me around and slapped me with his open hand, he smacked me really hard, banging my head on the wall. I'm sure I made a dent on the wall with my cranium. I felt the warm blood seeping from my lip and onto my shirt. My lip was throbbing and I could taste my own blood, a big bump already forming on the back of my head.

That's when I noticed loud grunting and the sound of shoes sliding on the floor and saw Leah being held back by a wide eyed Paul. He had his arms around her waist and she was desperately trying to free herself, snarling, wild, like only she can act, when she is pissed beyond herself. But Paul was still stronger than her, and was holding on to her with all his might.

"Jacob, don't hit him!" Screamed Emily, why is it that there were three wolves and one human in the room and the two females are the only ones that try to defend me? Just like it happened in school when Kim stood up to Jacob, apparently human females have more courage than most Quileute male wolves.

Still holding me against the wall with one arm, Jacob turned to glare at Emily, immediately Sam stood protectively in front of her, giving Jacob a warning look. Jacob knew better than to try anything against Emily, first it was forbidden by pack law to hurt other wolves' imprints; actually the pack was bound to protect them, with their own lives if necessary. Second, he knew that Sam would not just stand there and let him hurt Emily; he would fight to the death, if that's what it took to keep her safe.

"Enough of this shit, you are coming with me now". Jacob snaked his arms around my waist and started dragging me towards the door that I tried to run to earlier.

"No, I don't want to go! Leah please, help me!" I looked pleadingly at my sister, barely being able to see her, my eyes blurry with the tears that were pouring down my cheeks. Leah using brute force pushed Paul's arms off her and motioned to take off running towards us, ready to charge at Jacob, when Paul grabbed her, throwing her behind him and jumping towards the alpha.

In one fluid movement Jacob pushed me towards the kitchen table and tackled Paul, landing his fist right on Paul's jaw. I winced when I heard a crack and saw Paul fall to the floor holding his jaw. Jacob grabbed him by the blood stained shirt and stood him up, just to punch him hard on the gut; Paul bent over in pain, forcefully puffing out air, a purple bruise already forming on his broken jaw. His knees buckled from the force of the attack and he fell on the floor gasping for air. Paul like the stubborn idiot that he is, gathered whatever strength he had left and stood up giving Jacob an excuse to hit him again, like a train out of control, in a collision course with Paul's body, Jacob balled his fist landing it between Paul's waist and his ribcage, now it was the sound of cracking ribs that resonated in the dense air in the kitchen, the impact was so strong I saw blood shoot out of his mouth. Paul hit the floor several feet behind him, next to a stunned Leah; who immediately went to his aid.

"That is for interfering and for that little stunt you pulled on the cliffs". Said Jacob coldly.

Leah glared at Jacob her eyes utterly lethal, she was mad; I've never seen so much anger in her face. She was tensing again, her whole body shaking. Paul grabbed her weakly making her look at him.

"Leah please don't try, that person is not Jacob, he lost himself to the wolf. That is not a human being, that's an animal, a dangerous animal. Please do it for me, I can't defend you and I need you". Gasped Paul as the pain from his fractured jaw and broken ribs barely allowed him to speak.

While Jacob was busy dealing with Paul, Sam pushed Emily out the door and thankfully now she was hiding somewhere outside the house. I breathed a sigh of relief knowing that at least Emily was safe from the rage of this monster. I stood up and situated myself behind Sam who was standing protectively in front of me, Jacob turned his body to look at us and Sam stood his ground.

"GIVE ...ME ...MY ...SETH" Jacob growled, baring his teeth.

"HE IS MINE". He snarled, his tone feral and demanding.

"I WILL NOT LET YOU TAKE HIM!" Sam yelled at the top of his voice

This startled Jacob for a moment, but I could feel the anger building inside him, the raw instinct to attack and possess. I feared for my brother's life, he was standing between Jacob and his prey, Sam was expendable in Jacob's eyes. I touched my brothers back to make him look at me, when he did, I pleaded with my eyes, I couldn't find my voice, but I knew he would understand the message_, calm down_.

"Not now, not like this. Jake, you need to calm down, let me help you. Fight against your wolf, you are stronger than he is, find your humanity." Jacob paused, the rage in his expression changing to surprise. Unfortunately that only lasted a couple of seconds and the beast was back, hungry for flesh and blood.

"I'm not waiting any more, Sam get out of my way; you'll only get hurt." Jacob had only one thing on his mind, he seemed to have lost his capacity for rational though. He was just following his impulses and his most primal needs.

"Jake this is not you; you love Seth, I know you do. You can not hurt your imprint, please stop and listen to me". Sam was trying to reason with Jacob, trying to help him will his wolf into obeying him, but it was useless; there is no reasoning with this beast.

"I'm done listening, move aside or face the consequences". Jacob all but screamed shaking in anger, his features twisted, transformed under the influence of the monster inside him.

"I'm not handing you my little brother voluntarily, you'll have to fight me for him and believe me, I won't back down. I'll never accept this, not when you are acting like a maniac." This was the clash of the alphas, the acting alpha vs. the rightful alpha. I kept racking my brain trying to come up with a plan to help Sam if they started fighting. We were in the kitchen, I just needed to get to the drawer where Emily kept the knives; I could attack Jacob. I don't want to kill him, but at least I could slow him down, impairing him so Sam could have an advantage.

Jacob's whole body had been shaking with anger and then suddenly he stopped. His lips tilted up in the corners, giving him a truly deranged look. He would inspire fear on anybody; his huge body was a lethal machine, commanded by a madman. His shirt splattered with blood from both Paul and me. He was looking directly at Sam with a possessed look in his eyes and an infernal smirk on his lips.

"Sam, you don't have to accept or approve anything, all you have to do is OBEY". The last word resonated in the whole room. I could see the horror in Leah's eyes at the realization of what was going to happen.

"Move away from Seth and stay away, do not come near us". Jacob said this with a demonical expression on his face and using the double timbre of the alpha voice, a command so emphatic that Sam was not going to be able to resist.

I saw Sam's feet move slightly, he was fighting the alpha command with all his strength. The tension was evident on his shoulders, his fists balled by his sides; even his feet seemed to be trying to anchor themselves to the floor. But at the end, his strength failed him and he moved away, walking slowly toward Leah.

"Leah the same goes for you, do not come near Seth or me". I saw Leah flinch when Jacob's voice hit her.

"COWARD! You are not man enough to fight my brother. If you weren't alpha I'm sure things will be different, you couldn't manipulate people with a simple command. You're a worthless piece of shit Jacob Black!." I spat at him, saying his name like it was the foulest thing ever to leave my lips.

With just two steps, Jacob was in front of me, his hand bolted out grabbing me by the throat and lifting me into the air using just one arm. I couldn't breath, I was fighting to free myself from his grasp, swinging my legs in all directions and digging my fingers under his fist, which seemed to be anchored on my neck, I was suffocating and this beast didn't seem to care. The only expression present in his eyes was rage; there were no other feelings, his humanity buried beneath the anger. Slowly I felt the darkness creeping in; I welcomed it, a relief to all this pain. I was grateful I was loosing consciousness, is this how it feels to die? Is Jacob killing me?

"Jacob let go, you're killing him!" it was Leah's voice, it seemed distant, I couldn't see her, but I could hear the terror in her voice.

He let go of my throat and grabbed me as I was crumbling toward the ground semi- conscious.

"Seth, Seth, open your eyes". I could hear Jacob voice, but it too seemed to be very far away, all could make out was that he sounded weird, a combination of fear and concern.

I forcefully took in air and opened my eyes to face the most miserable creature to ever walk the face of the earth. With air filling my lungs I felt stronger and struggled in his arms trying to free myself from his hold.

"Please Sam don't let him take me, pleeeease". With a gravelly voice I begged my brother, looking at him for help, his back towards me; he had his arms around Leah's waist holding her or holding on to her.

"Damn it Sam, look at me! Help me; don't let this animal take me." Sam turned around and for the first time in my life I saw him cry, not even when our parents died, he allowed me to see him cry. I was shocked, I was helpless and at the mercy of a monster.

"Let's go baby we've wasted enough time". Jacob grabbed me by the elbow and pushed me towards the door. I was not going to go without a fight.

"Don't call me that, I'm not your fucking baby." It hurt to talk after his assault.

"Oh yes you are, you said so yourself, my fucking baby, you have no idea how much I'm going to enjoy fucking that sweet ass of yours."

"Stay away from me pervert!" The blow came before I even finished the sentence, this time I heard a crack and felt a sharp pain on my nose. Then the unmistakable scent of blood hit me, I felt my blood seeping out and falling on the floor as thick drops.

"You will respect me as your mate and as your alpha, every time you disrespect me you will pay with your own blood". A shiver ran up my spine when I heard Jacob say these words. What did he mean by that? I don't know if I want to find out.

He started dragging me again; I looked around the room only to see the horror in the eyes of my family and the pain in Paul's expression. I needed to fight this, if I had a shred of dignity left in my body I couldn't go willingly. I grabbed anything I could get my hands on, forcing Jacob to stop on his tracks, only to yank me away violently a second later.

I couldn't believe this, this is worse than any nightmare. He was going to take me, he was going to win. He will rob me of everything I hold dear, my life, my family, my body, but especially he will rob me of my freedom.

"No no no don't take me, I don't want to go please, please. Sam Leah do something, help me... help me please... he is going to rape me, don't let him do it. Please I'm begging somebody do something." I was sobbing and screaming as much as my battered throat allowed me, begging my family to help me, but of course their hands were tied behind their backs and they couldn't move, the alpha command holding them in place.

Jacob flung me over his shoulder like I was a sack of potatoes and stormed out the back door cursing under his breath. I kept hitting his back and kicking his chest but I knew he barely felt it. I kept screaming for help.

"Help! Help me, somebody, I'm being kidnapped, please somebody, call the police!" My voice was even worse now, it hurt like crazy and all the screaming was not helping.

"Seth shut your mouth and stop hitting me right now!" His third alpha command of the night resonated around us. At that moment I knew all hope was lost.

**I hope you enjoyed this chapter as much as I enjoyed writing it. I will love to hear from you; your comments help me grow as a writer. Please click on the review bar and tell me what you think about the story, I'll really appreciate it.**


	20. Chapter 20 A Bed, Condoms and Pain

**A big thank you to all the readers, especially those who added the story to their alerts, favorite story or favorite author. To those of you who took the time to review you made my day, all your reviews give me encouragement to be a better writer. Whether you agree or not with the way the plot unfolds, your comments are appreciated.**

**I'm aware that some of you expected something very different from the last chapter but in the way I've envisioned the story, everything needed to happen the way it did.**

**WARNING: This chapter will contain violence, physical and sexual abuse; please don't read it if you think it will affect you. If you decide not to read it, wait for the next chapter, I'll update soon. If you decide this is a better route for you, let me know and I'll send you a short summary with the basics of what happened.**

**I don't own Twilight or any of its characters, they belong to Stephenie Meyer.**

Chapter 20 A bed, condoms and pain

**Seth POV**

Jacob decided that the best way to get to his house would be through the forest, the thick forest between my house and his would provide protection from prying eyes. It was going to take longer, but considering the fact that he had a terrified sixteen year old boy, unwillingly being carried toward his house, made that a smart choice.

Halfway there I started to feel that the cake and a few other goodies that I ate during the party were going to make an appearance. I was upside down and seconds away from barfing on Jacob's back, maybe that would gross him out and throw him off his game, but with my luck he may like it. I guess he heard me gag, without looking at my face he placed me on the floor only to scoop me up a second later, carrying me now bridal style. He took off running, not even breaking a sweat.

After the nausea subsided I was able to think clearly. What I've feared for the last three months was becoming a reality; this is a nightmare from which I will never wake up. I decided to hold my head high; my dignity was going to take a blow, but I didn't want Jacob to see me broken, I would not give him that pleasure, other pleasures well... that is a different story, I shrugged at that thought.

I'm not going to lie, I was beyond terrified, it is one thing to think about what is going to happen, but something entirely different, to see it unfold before your eyes. I watched the serene expression on his face and wondered what he was thinking about. Did he have any regrets about what he just did, hitting Paul, hitting me, about kidnapping me?

I brought my hand up to my swollen face and flinched when my fingers grazed the bruised flesh. With the corner of my eye, I saw him glance briefly towards me when I flinched, only to look straight ahead a second later. I fought the tears forming in my eyes, for now I was in control; this was the calm before the storm.

We arrived at his house and he kicked open the backdoor, it was completely dark inside, I guessed his old man was not home, he walked us both in, running up the stairs. We walked into a dark room where he placed me on the bed. Holding on to my wrist, like he feared I was going to take off running and jump out the window, he stretched to turn on the lamp on the bedside table.

I started shaking like I was possessed when his stench hit my nostrils and it was very clear where we were, the condom room.

He sat beside me, still holding my wrist, running his fingers trough my hair and with his thumb trailed the contour of my face from my ear to my chin.

"Beautiful, my Seth"

This mother fucker was completely crazy! Here I was with a swollen lip, broken nose, red rimmed eyes and a tear streaked face and he called me beautiful. I was livid, was he making fun of me? I just looked at him grunting in frustration, not being able to speak because I was still under the gag order he put on me on our way here. Usually I was able to get around his orders but apparently today was the exception.

He lifted his hand and cupped my face, the heat from his skin was surprisingly soothing but my face was very tender and I flinched away from him. He removed his hand not saying anything but furrowed his eyebrows together. Jacob bent towards me and started placing gentle kisses on my temple going down to my cheek and brushing my lips with his. I tried to move my head to refuse him access to my mouth, but was held in place with his free hand.

"Seth, don't reject my kisses, you don't have any other choice. Today is the day, I will claim you". I heard a low growl coming from his chest and those words hung on the air like daggers, burrowing themselves on my flesh and killing me slowly.

He took the hem of my shirt and lifted it over my head, throwing it beside the bed. He stared at my naked chest, his eyes glazed over with lust. Jacob licked his lips and attacked my neck sucking on the spot where the neck meets the shoulder.

"My mark is completely faded but I'll take care of that, today I'll place a permanent mark on you, one that will never go away. Your mating mark will tell anybody who sees it, that you belong to me and will confirm to any wolf that I've been inside you, that you've been claimed". Jacob was whispering huskily while sucking and licking my neck, like he was tenderizing the sensitive skin in that area.

My chest felt tight, I couldn't breathe, unable to hold the tears any longer I started sobbing uncontrollably, the reality of what was happening hitting me all at once.

"Shhh, calm down puppy, it won't be that bad. Today it will hurt like hell, but eventually you'll get used to it, you may even begin to like it. At least you will have the satisfaction of knowing that you are pleasing your dominant, that with every rip of your ass and every drop of blood you spill, you would have given me an immeasurable amount of pleasure."

Yep, it was settled, Jacob was completely insane. Deep down I understood that it was not Jacob, but his wolf, but still felt betrayed by the man who professed to love me. He couldn't defend me against the sociopath that lived inside him, quite the opposite, he facilitated this unrelenting attack.

He bent down again and started licking my chest stopping to suck one of my nipples, if I weren't so terrified I would've enjoyed this, but right now I just wanted to find a way to detach myself from the whole situation, pretend I was at home, sleeping in my bed and in the morning I was going to wake up, grateful that this had only been a bad dream.

Jacob continued down my abdomen licking and kissing every inch of it, stopping to lick my waist, just above my jeans. I froze when I felt him opening the button and the zipper of my pants. He removed my pants and underwear all at once leaving me bare on the bed, looking at me like I was the most delicious dish and he was going to eat me.

How am I supposed to get out of this? I could not even speak; if I could I would plead, beg, bargain do anything to save myself. This is so unfair, he had taken away any tool I had to defend myself, I couldn't hit him and I couldn't speak... creep, bastard, sadist.

S_eth you can fight this, you've done it before, he ordered you not to speak so do just that, but also silence your mind. Only listen to my voice don't think and don't fight. _

Fighting against my fear I willed myself to do what my wolf instructed. She had never failed me, always giving me good counsel. I concentrated on her voice until all I sensed was white noise. After a few minutes I felt my body relax and wondered if I got my voice back. I needed to check, to see if her plan worked.

"Stop touching me!" I screamed to the top of my lungs startling Jacob. Since he was not over me but more beside me I was able to jump off the bed and take off running toward the window, trying to make a run for it. He blocked my escape; grabbing me by the neck, he held me in place.

"That was a big mistake Seth Clearwater, you were doing so well and submitting to me like you should've done three months ago. I was going to take it slow, be gentle and prepare you, so the pain would be minimal. But now you are going to learn the real meaning of the word pain." There was something dark and almost animalistic settled over his eyes.

He flung me to the bed like I was a rag doll; I landed on the middle of the bed, bouncing once. Before I could blink he was over me straddling my hips, a look of pure rage in his black eyes. He leaned back to remove his pants while still pinning my legs with his, but this gave me the opening to sit up and using all my strength began hitting him. I had no chance of even bruising him, but at least it will give me the certainty of knowing I did everything I could.

He grabbed my hands, pushing me back; he held them by the wrists over my head. I wouldn't dare look down but I felt something very hard, big and hot on my hip.

"You feel that baby? Why don't you look down to see the cock that will pound you into submission?" Jacob sat back and pulled me up making me look at him.

OH SHIT ...

His cock was huge, long and thick; it looked like it was capable of inflicting a world of pain. There was no way in hell that thing is going to fit inside me, he is going to kill me, I will tear and bleed to death.

"Like what you see? I know it is a little intimidating but I'm sure it will fit, at least I hope so because I've been looking forward to this mating for a long time and killing you in the process was not part of the plan." He said that with a wicked grin, I wished I was stronger so I could knock that stupid grin off his face. What I couldn't understand was how he could speak of killing me so easily, he claims to have imprinted on me and he shouldn't be able to hurt me.

"NO, I don't like it, it's disgusting and I don't like guys. You may be gay, but I'm not." The words left my mouth before I could think of the consequences. His fist connected with my face again knocking me back towards the bed. My left eye was clouded by the blood coming out of the wound over my eye and pooling around it. I had to turn my head to the side to allow the blood to flow to the bed.

"I warned you, any disrespect will be paid in blood. Let me tell you something, this cock that you find so disgusting, is going to pound you into this bed again and again, as many times as it takes to make you submit, you'll kiss it and suck it and bend over so I can put it in your ass as many times as I want and you will like it." His voice sounded beyond angry.

He reached towards the side table and opened the drawer extracting a strip of condoms that he placed over the table. He took one, ripping open the foil and began to slide it over his erection. But then he stopped to look at me.

"No, no condom for the first time I want to feel you, I want to feel your insides as I push my length into you. I want to come inside you filling you with my seed, which will make your scent mix with mine, confirming without a doubt that you belong to me. Maybe I'll even get lucky and get you pregnant on the first try." His voice sent shivers through my whole body. The idea of getting raped was horrible and the possibility of getting pregnant as a result of the attack was beyond terrifying.

His eyes went to my abdomen and I felt my whole body shudder. Jacob closed his eyes like he was daydreaming, a look of pure bliss on his face, using this momentary distraction I shifted under him, dragging myself until my back was touching the metal headboard, the coldness of the steel even more evident against my overheated skin.

Unfortunately, he noticed and with fierce determination grabbed my legs pulling me towards him.

"Please Jacob ..." I couldn't finish, I was struggling in a malevolent game of tug- of- war where he was pulling my legs toward him and I was resisting.

_Seth, his wolf is calling me, the need to mate is too strong, but you are not ready, and if this happens today, it will destroy all of us. Do as I say, I don't know if it will work, but it's worth a try. Beg, tell him what he wants to hear, promise respect._

"Please Jacob don't do this, I'll be good, I'll respect you, I'll do anything you want but please stop!" I yelled at him.

"The only thing I want from you right now is your ass". His voice was full of energy, rage and desire.

Jacob pulled my legs again, but I was holding on with all my strength to the bars that made up the headboard. Some of the bars started bending at the brute force with which Jacob was pulling; at one point I thought he was going to dislocate my legs.

_Beg, plead, this is not the place for pride._

"Don't do this please, I'm begging you." I hated the idea of begging to this asshole, but if it gives me a chance to get out of this mess unscathed, I'm wiling to try it.

"Nooooo please Jacob stop pulling my legs! I cried out in pain, his grip on my legs was so strong that if I wasn't a wolf he would've cut the blood circulation on my legs. His fingers felt like claws going into my skin and drawing blood.

"Let go of the fucking bars or I'm going to break your fingers" He growled.

"Please Jake."

"Please don't hurt me!" I was sobbing loudly.

Jacob jumped off the bed moving toward me and prying my hands from the bars I was desperately holding to. He grabbed me and slammed my body roughly against the bed, immediately situating himself over me.

_Seth stall him, make him stop and think._

"What did I do to deserve this Jake, what?" I could barely talk my voice getting drowned by my sobs.

Jacob stopped moving and taking a deep breath answered in a frightening calm voice. "You denied me my right, Seth. The first time you phased and I told you to give yourself to me you didn't. Then your brother came to me with the stupid condition that I had to wait three fucking months. This long wait made both me and my wolf crazy with lust."

"Jake, I'm just a kid."

"May I remind you that we are very close in age?" Because of his height and built Jacob looked a lot older than he really was, it was very easy to forget he was seventeen, a little over a year older than me.

"When I phased I had no idea what was going on. Everything hit me at once, please give me more time." I didn't know what to say, feeling like my brain was running out of ideas. My wolf was trying to help me, but she was being seriously affected by Jacob's wolf. He was truly the villain of the night, attacking everybody in an unquenchable search for pleasure.

"No more time! I'm done waiting!" Jacob roared.

Jacob grabbed my legs trying to pull them apart. I fought it with all my strength, I could feel the pressure of his hands on my flesh, and deep bruises were probably already forming. I was fighting for my purity, my dignity and my freedom.

"Damn it Seth, stop fighting, you are not going to win this one, this is futile!"

He yanked my legs apart, taking one and pulling it over his shoulder, giving him total access to my hole.

"Mmm so delicious, at last" he grabbed his thick cock and placed the tip on my entrance; I couldn't help but tense my whole body, waiting for the pain that was coming. I tried to wiggle myself away but he had an iron grip on my leg and on my hip.

_Stop fighting, it's not working, you are only making him angrier, his wolf feeds of rage and you are giving him strength. You need a different approach, stay still. Appeal to his feelings toward you; that's the only thing that will be louder than his wolf._

"Please Jake stop, I don't want this, don't rape me." My voice was barely audible but I knew Jacob could hear me.

"I'm not raping you, this is my right. You are my mate and I can take you whenever I want, any way I want." I felt cold shiver creeping up from my feet all the way up to the back of my neck. This statement made me understand how much his wolf was twisting his mind. He truly believed that what he was doing was correct, that it was his right.

_His wolf is totally in control; his howling is unrelenting and obscene. Seth, try harder, his mind is made up. I don't understand how I'm not affecting you to some extent because I want him, he is calling to me and I need to answer, I crave him. You are on your own, if you want to avoid getting raped you will have to do better than this. Use what you know about imprints, you have a lot of power over him, use it. You are stronger than me, do it for us._

"Please Jake stop and listen to yourself ..." I couldn't finish, I felt an unfamiliar burning in my entrance and realized he was pushing his cock inside me, I needed to think fast.

"I thought you loved me Jake." I struggled with each word, between the fear and the pain, my brain and my mouth stopped communicating.

"I adore you Seth, we'll be one." With this words he pushed further in, I felt my entrance stretching as the russet mushroom made its way inside my body.

"Ahhhh!" I screamed as the first pang of pain hit me.

"Please Jake, this hurts, stop!" I was sobbing uncontrollably, scared and angry. He wouldn't respond to my pleas and kept pumping in and out gently, thankfully for now is just head, but he was stretching the ring of muscle with each movement.

"Jacob please stop for one minute and listen!" I was able to get my sobs under control at least for a moment.

"No more stopping, no more waiting." His face was expressionless I thought that the moment he had me, he would at least look happy, but he looked anything but. He looked like he could've been mowing the lawn.

"Just one minute Jake please, then I'll shut up and you'll have me fully, I'll even pretend to enjoy it." I made a completely false promise, there was no way on earth I would ever enjoy having Jacob over me fucking me in the ass, I didn't even know if I could pretend to enjoy it.

Jacob seemed conflicted but stopped moving.

I reached up placing my shaking hands on his cheeks; it felt like his skin was on fire. Immediately I saw a change in him, he closed his eyes and took a deep breath. This is the second time I touch him willingly, the first one was the night I found him crying in his room. That first time ended in disaster. I pray this time will be different.

"Jake, I know you love me and need to be with me, but if you claim me today, against my will, I'll never forgive you. Please give me time to get to know you, give me the chance to fall in love with you. Let me be in love with you the first time we make love. Jakey please, all I want is to love you." A chocked sob prevented me from continuing, I was mad at myself for not being able to control my emotions and prayed that what I said was enough to stop this attack.

He stopped moving, momentarily looking like a statue, except sweat was pouring down his face and chest. His marble like appearance changed gradually, his eyebrows furrowed, his lips settling into a tense thin line. His whole body shaking roughly, he looked like he was in pain. I sensed he was suffering but couldn't understand why. I was terrified not knowing what all this meant, was he becoming more aggressive? If that was even possible, or was he calming down? When he opened his eyes he answered my question, he looked confused, dazed even, but there was something very different.

His eyes where not completely black anymore, there were hints of brown. He was regaining control! Jake was fighting his wolf. There was hope, at least he stopped impaling me, he didn't get that far inside of me, just the tip, but we were still in a very dangerous position, this could go either way.

I breathed a sigh of relief when I felt him pull out of me. Putting my leg down, he took my legs and placed them together on the bed. I motioned to remove my hands from his face but he grabbed my wrists holding both my hands in one of his, he kissed them softly and let go of them. Jacob stood up and walked slowly towards the door, where he stood for a minute.

"Don't leave this room and don't get dressed, I'll be back." he ordered and slammed the door. I heard his foot steps as he ran down the stairs and out the back door.

I don't know how long I stayed in the same position he left me, head on the pillow, hands clasped on my chest and legs tightly together. I was covered in sweat and a slight discomfort on my rear end reminded me of what started to happen and how bad it could've been. I'm sure I'll be having nightmares about this night for the rest of my life. But I guess I shouldn't complain, it could've been a lot worse. If he had not changed his mind, right now I would've been in a world of pain, I had to shake the images that came to my head, of me screaming in pain as he fucked me mercilessly.

I have to remember to thank my wolf next time she pops up; she came to my aid when I needed her the most. I felt physically and emotionally exhausted, I've never experienced such a broad range of emotions in such a short period of time before in my life, despair, worry, joy, hope, anger and desperation.

Sweet mother, for the second time in three months I came just a heartbeat away from getting raped! This realization made my stomach stir and I felt something dangerously moving towards my throat. Frantically I looked around finding a small wastebasket next to the dresser just in time as most of the food I consumed during the party made a second appearance. Worrying this may not be a one time event; I sat on the carpet next to the wastebasket. After several minutes the nausea subsided and I stood up.

Looking around I noticed that the room looked different from the last time I saw it, the walls had been painted a light shade of blue, the bed was in the same position in the middle of the wall, but had two nightstands, one on each side of the bed, there was also one small lamp on each nightstand. A small desk with a chair had been placed next to the window. I walked to this window that now had a heavy dark blue curtain, the kind used to darken a room; I opened the drape and was shocked when I saw the window had been nailed shut. I lost count of how many nails the fucker put in that frame, he really wanted to make sure I didn't jump out of the window.

Moving back to the dresser that now had a small television on it, I opened the first drawer and saw that it was empty and the same went with the other four drawers. All the cardboard boxes were gone also. The closet was mostly empty with the exception of an extra pillow and a blanket. Under different circumstances I would've liked this room, it was spacious and the bed was comfortable. It was evident that Jacob made an effort to make our (gag) bedroom pleasant for me.

I tried to leave the room but couldn't because of the order he gave me before leaving and I was too tired to fight it. Going back to the bed I saw the blood on the pillow from the last time he punched me. I brought my hands to my face wincing in pain when I touched my eye, nose and lip, I must look terrible right now. Grabbing the flat bed sheet I wrapped myself with it, not because I was cold but wanting to cover my body any way possible. He ordered me not to get dressed and technically I was not getting dressed. I lay down on the bed and brought my knees to my chest curling up into a ball. I didn't cry, I couldn't cry anymore, it was like I had no more tears; I just laid there and allowed sleep to take me.

Jacob POV

I had to leave before I did something that will make Seth hate me forever, running out before I made things even worse. I lost myself in my wolf, he warned me this was going to happen, but I didn't believe it, I was convinced I was going to be able to stay in control, I was deluding myself, this task was almost impossible when it came to Seth.

I went outside and took out my anger and frustration on as many trees as I could; after I'm done this will be a pretty decent clearing. Three days ago I came back to La Push, I wanted to get our bedroom ready for our first night together and make sure that Billy was away for the weekend. Painted the room blue, Seth's favorite color and bought a blue and brown comforter. Fearing Seth's resistance and defiance especially in the beginning, I decided to nail the window shut with four inch nails. It will probably be easier to replace the whole window than to pull out all those nails. I had to do all this while remaining hidden because I didn't want anybody to know I was back. As much as it hurts to accept this, I knew that my presence would ruin his birthday and I wanted his day to be perfect. I was suffering not being able to be with him, but I love him enough to put him first.

Shortly before imprinting on Seth I sold one of the two motorcycles I rebuilt and was planning to save the money and put it towards buying a car, but decided to invest the money on our bedroom and Seth's birthday present. I don't think he even guessed that the laptop came from me; I know he likes school and is a good student so I thought that a computer would be a useful present for him. As for me, I don't think I'll be going back to school, the principal already told my dad that I missed too many days of school and with my low grade point average I was going to have to repeat the eleventh grade. That was not going to happen; I needed to get a job to provide for Seth and I never liked school anyway. I'll get my high school equivalency certificate eventually. Sam offered to help out financially since he knows my dad and I live off his disability check, but I wouldn't hear it, Seth is my mate and my responsibility.

Finally it was June 18, Seth's birthday, I could barely contain myself as I waved goodbye to my father who was leaving for an extended weekend fishing trip with his friend Charlie. I started counting the hours, tried to sleep but it was impossible, I was too anxious. At last I was going to be able to have Seth back in my arms, I fantasized thinking he would be happy to see me and would come with me willingly. Just thinking about what awaited us when I brought him home with me, gave me an instant hard-on, I had to jerk off several times before I decided I needed to do something to keep my mind occupied or I was going to go crazy with anticipation. I cleaned the house from top to bottom, took a long shower and made dinner for myself. I still had to wait until after midnight to go get him.

As I looked outside at the starry sky, I couldn't wait any longer. I had to take a peek at what was going on at his party. If I stayed downwind nobody would be able to catch my scent. I ran to his house staying far enough so I was able to see, but not risking anybody seeing me. There he was, the most gorgeous creature to walk this earth, he was a little bit thinner than the last time I saw him, his skin was a perfect cooper color, not one blemish on his perfect skin. His proximity to other males made me very uncomfortable, but I took a deep breath and stayed put.

I whimpered when he went inside the house and I couldn't see him anymore, after what seemed like an eternity I saw Quil pulling him out of the house. I felt my blood begin to boil when I saw Quil's hand around Seth's wrist, how dare he touch my mate? I'll have to break his hand first chance I get. Nobody touches my Seth; he is mine, only mine. They all started playing something that looked like football; damn, my baby is fast, nobody was able to tackle him. He hit Paul right on the face and it seemed to be on purpose. Good job baby, he owes us for the day on the cliffs.

At one point I almost lost my resolve and ran to him, I saw him bend forward and ask for time, I thought he was hurt, until I heard his laughter. It was the purest most beautiful melody I ever heard; the sheer joy of his laugh filled my hearth with love and made me forget the loneliness of the last months. It's amazing the effect that his proximity and something as simple as his laugh had on me.

They sang happy birthday and everybody congratulated him. Shit, why was everybody touching him? Hugging him, ugh, everybody can touch him except the only one who was supposed to, me, his mate. My wolf was taunting me, ordering me to crash the party and put everybody in its place, then take Seth and make him submit, to claim him as mine forever.

I felt myself losing control as the frustration of not being able to be near him and the jealousy hit me. I ran into to forest to vent my frustrations punching holes in some trees. This prevented me from punching holes in my pack mates. After a while I realized it must be after midnight so I walked back to the house. Stopping outside the kitchen window I could hear him talking and when his sweet scent hit me, it sent me into an automatic frenzy. All ideas of control or tenderness were replaced with need and lust.

The wolf was taking control and there was nothing I could do to avoid it. The compassionate thing to do would've been to leave and try to regain control, but I couldn't. Unable to move away from him, I stealthily walked inside the house. His back was towards me and as I wrapped my arms around his slender figure, I felt complete for the first time in months. My wolf howled in victory when we felt the warmth of his skin and the proximity to his body made me lose myself in everything that was Seth.

Unfortunately everything went downhill from there; he rejected me and insulted me once again. I didn't appreciate or welcome his family trying to intervene with my plans, this pissed me off. I thought we had an agreement and I kept my side of the deal, now they were denying me my right, who the fuck do they think they are? Paul got what he deserved; he had to learn that nobody messes with my imprint. I had to use alpha commands and ended up carrying him out of the house kicking and screaming. Why couldn't my life ever be easy?

At least one good thing came out of this whole fucked up situation. My Seth told me he wanted to love me. I never thought he felt that way, at that moment I knew I had to stop. I couldn't hurt him; if I did, I would've destroyed what could possibly be, my only chance at happiness. It was so hard to will my wolf to calm down, to push him back inside me. He was physically hurting me and emotionally abusing me. But I won, I was stronger than him, I had to be strong for Seth, for me and for our future.

When the first morning rays started hitting the earth I saw all the damage I inflicted to the woods. I seriously needed to plant some trees to replace all the ones I destroyed; for sure we will have plenty of wood for the chimney next winter. I walked back to my house and went inside, once there I noticed there was no movement in our room but I could hear Seth's even breathing, he was probably asleep.

I went upstairs and entered our room; I like the sound of that, _our_ room. The space where we'll intimately coexist, where we'll sleep and where we'll make love. This will be our little piece of the world. I felt this room would be sacred to me and hopefully once Seth accepts us, he would feel the same way. So many feelings assaulted me all at once; joy, worry and love were the most prevalent ones.

A small smile formed on my face when I thought of sharing this room with my Seth, but it quickly vanished when the sight in front off me made my hearth ache. He was wrapped in a blanket, curled up in fetal position. I noticed a horrible smell and located the source in the wastebasket. My poor baby was so upset after I left that he lost his dinner, not because of my absence, but because of what I did. The final blow was seeing the bruises on his face, I'm sure those are not the only ones, his arms and legs must be also covered in bruises from when he was struggling with me.

I was really a worthless piece of shit; how could I do that to him? How could I mess with perfection? I wanted to hold him, but knew I didn't deserve to, leaving our room I went to mine and collapsed on the bed with a heavy heart, blisters and bruises covering my hands. Now more than ever, I was determined to earn his love and his forgiveness. It won't be easy, because there is already too much bad blood between us, but I'll do everything in my power to show him the immensity of my love for him. This was not a choice and it was not the effect of the imprint. I knew I loved him a long time ago, but was in deep denial. I started to frequent his house trying to catch a glimpse of him and became Sam's friend in the process. Everything changed once we started phasing and learned the truth of our heritage and our purpose for existing. I didn't want this life for him, but there was nothing I could do, it was in his blood and even though it took longer that any of us, it happened and I imprinted on him. Since that day I've craved his smile, his kisses, his body, but most of all, his love. I need him like I need the air to breathe.

My actions today may have ruined any chance at happiness we had. I have to make it up to him, I owe Seth that much. He is extremely stubborn, it will be very hard to prove myself to him but I'll do everything I can. I'll need to be very firm and tame his spirit without breaking him, giving him the best of me and expecting nothing in return. Hopefully one day he will be able to see the real me, the man that is deeply in love with him, the man who would give his life for him without giving it a second thought.

**To those of you who are craving sweet and tender moments between our wolves, bear with me, they are coming, we'll even have a preview on the next chapter.**

**Remember to click the little bar that says review and let me know what you think.**


	21. Chapter 21 Taming Seth

**As always a big thank you to all the readers, especially those who added the story to their alerts, favorite story or favorite author. To those of you, who took the time to review you made me very happy; all your reviews give me encouragement to be a better writer. Whether you agree or not with the way the plot unfolds, your comments are welcomed.**

**Well, here is another chapter, it's a lot less violent than the last two, I promise. Our boys still have a long journey ahead of them, they might be mythical creatures, but their love is real and not influenced by magic. There is too much bad blood between them and they need to grow, forgive and forget, but that will take time. **

**I don't own Twilight or any of its characters, they belong to Stephenie Meyer.**

Chapter 21 Taming Seth

Seth POV

I woke up, and immediately I'm brought out of my slumber by a light throbbing pain in my head. Looking around I silently wished everything had been a nightmare and I was at home in my own bed, but that was not the case. How long was I sleeping? I had no idea. I dragged my eyes to a tiny ray of light peeking through a gap between the window and the curtain; it was painfully clear where I was, the condom room. Last night had not been a nightmare; it was a painful reality, one that I will never escape from. I could smell Jacob's scent mixed with my own and the metallic scent of my blood on the bed, this made my stomach churn.

As I sat up on the bed I groaned at the dull pain I felt all over my body. My arms where covered in yellowish-purple bruises, that already looked like they were three or four days old. I brought my hands up to my face, my whole face hurt; I couldn't even begin to guess how I looked right now. I ran my fingers over my eyebrow where I remembered Jake's strike produced a gash that bled considerably. It felt like it was healing, but was still very tender; my nose was still swollen, apparently taking a little bit longer to heal. But most of all, my heart and my soul were hurting.

My biggest fear became a reality, I was Jacob's prisoner. He felt I was his property and was planning to use me as much as my body would allow without breaking. I still couldn't believe he didn't rape me last night, how he was able to stop will always baffle me. I was just grateful for this small amount of self control and for my wolf. Her help was invaluable, I was sure that without her counsel, Jake would still be on top of me.

_You're welcome Seth, but don't sell yourself short, you were pretty awesome. You were able to resist when not even I could._

"It's easy to resist when you hate the other person as much as I hate Jacob." I answered bitterly.

_Seth, this has nothing to do with love or hate. When it comes to you, his wolf is a true monster. I wish you could've heard him last night. The way he was taunting and leading Jacob was primal, animalistic, pure torture. His wolf demanded your body, demanded to be appeased for the three months it had to wait. _

For a split second I understood and felt sorry for Jacob, but it was short lived as I remembered how he hit me last night and my anger flourished again.

"But it was not the wolf's fist I felt on my face, it was Jacob's." I felt a growl rumble in my chest caused by the feeling of impotence and weakness at not being able to defend my family or myself against the sadistic alpha.

_Seth, you are making me lose my patience; is perplexing how you can be so self-centered. You have no idea the amount of restraint and self control Jacob had to use to resist doing what he is destined to do, what he had been dreaming about for the last three months. The strength he had to use to will his wolf to step down was unreal. _

"I know, I'm not completely ignorant, it's just hard to accept that he may have redeemed himself a little at the end. The real test is going to be to see how long will his resolve last."

_Even if it only lasts a day Seth, it is more than any of us expected. You are set on finding fault with absolutely everything he does, right?_

"I just hate him and that makes me see everything he does on a negative light. What I don't know, is what to do now. I need to buy my behind a little more time, at least until I can escape. Can you help me?"

_You are not seriously thinking about escaping, are you? _I could feel the concern of my wolf.

"Of course I am; there is no way I'll stay here and be his fucking punching bag for the rest of my life. The first time he lets his guard down, I'll high tail it out of here so fast, he will never be able to catch up with me." I was convinced that with my speed he would never catch me, if I waited and gained his trust I would even have the element of surprise on my side.

_Seth, listen to me, don't ever try something so stupid. Let me assure you, he WILL find you and when he does there is nothing in this universe that will save you. He may go berserk and even kill you._

"He can't kill me; I'm his freaking imprint for goodness sake!"

_He shouldn't be able to hurt you either, but the bruises in your body tell a different story, don't they? Jacob and his wolf are two separate entities that are tightly intertwined. His wolf is strong and brave, but when it comes to you it can be selfish and demanding. His wolf neither respects nor acknowledges any limits, imprint or not, it can become very violent. Jacob is a good kid, if you allow him, he'll be he best partner you could dream of, but both of you need to grow up._

"Whatever, going back to my question, can you help me?" I was truly annoyed at her; she was getting on my last nerve insisting that I accept Jacob and pursue a relationship with him.

_I can try but you need to be flexible, can you have an open mind when it comes to Jacob?_

"I'll do my best but I can not give you any guarantees." Who am I kidding? It was really stupid to lie to something that lived inside of you, but I still did it.

_Well is not my ass on the line, it's yours, so listen if you want. His wolf feeds of lust and rage. You cannot do anything about the lust because just inhaling your scent makes him ablaze. What you can do something about is the anger, the rage. Have you noticed that when he is calm he seems to be more in control_?

"Actually yes, I've noticed that." He is rarely calm around me so I was mostly guessing.

_Don't make him angry, don't defy him, help him stay in control. Seth, just your touch has such a calming effect on him, that if I didn't experience it with you guys, I wouldn't believe it. _

"I am not going to turn into a fucking submissive; I would first make him kill me."

_Seth, that's nonsense, you know as well as I do that you have no intention of letting Jake kill you. If you think that being respectful and considerate with your mate is being submissive, you are very wrong; you need to grow up kid. Anyway, this is not a matter of submitting, this is a matter of surviving. _

"Surviving? What do you mean?"

_Seth when an imprinted rejects the imprint the way you have been doing, it hurts both of you. In your case you don't feel it as much because of the way you feel about him. But Jacob feels every insult and every rejection as a white hot dagger digging a little deeper each time. If you keep this up, it might end up killing him._

"I hate him with every fiber of my being, but I don't want him to die." That was the absolute truth, as much as his presence bothers me, I couldn't bring myself to wish him dead. I did it once and the guilt was so tremendous I felt disgusted at myself. Even if he was a sadistic, abusive, son of a bitch, he was still a person, with a father that depended on him and a reservation that counted on him for their protection.

_There is more to that, right Seth? I'm convinced that you spoke the truth last night when you said you wanted to love him._

"Hold on a minute, I just said that because I thought that with the state he was in, I needed something drastic." What the hell was she suggesting? That I had feelings for that monster?

_If you say so, just remember that I live inside you; I have a pretty good idea of what is really going on. Well, it's your choice, live in denial if you want._

"Sure, Sure, whatever" was all I could muster feeling annoyed at her.

I stood up and walked toward the window, opening the curtain I looked outside through the glass. It was another one of those grim rainy days. The eternally grey Washington sky felt especially depressing today. The raindrops made sinewy patterns on the glass window only to end up in puddles that covered the ground as far as the eye could see. The weather matched my mood perfectly.

I felt pressure in my lower abdomen and realized I needed to pee; I may need to use the wastebasket again. To my disappointment I couldn't find the wastebasket anywhere, Jacob must've come back while I was sleeping and took it away. He came back to the room while I was sleeping and didn't attack me? Shit, the pervert is full of surprises isn't he?

The door was opened forcefully and I saw Jacob's huge frame walking through, I ran to the bed, taking the bed sheet and wrapping myself with it. I couldn't let him see me naked, God only knows what would happen if he did.

Before I could finish the thought, he was standing next to me, looking at me with a murderous look in his eyes.

"Don't cover yourself Seth! I told you not to get dressed for a reason, don't try to go around my orders or you will regret it." Jacob all but yelled at me while pulling the bed sheet off my body.

I was left standing in front of him naked, shaking where I stood. The pained expression on his face, when he caught a sight of my naked body confused me. Looking down I realized the reason for his reaction, my arms, hips and legs were covered in yellowish-purple marks. Bruises marred my skin as a silent witness of the hours of hell I lived through last night.

Jacob was breathing deeply trying to calm himself; he pinched the bridge of his nose with his thumb and middle finger and with a fast gentle motion wiped his eyes.

"You are in my house now, you are my submissive, you will respect me and do everything I say if you know what's good for you." His tone was firm, but surprisingly calm. Actually, it sounded rehearsed.

"You will never wear any type of clothing while on our bed; I want you always naked in our bed. For the next few days, basically, as long as I want, you will not wear any clothes at all. My father won't be here for several days, we'll be alone and you will not cover yourself in front of me, is that clear?"

"Fuck Seth, answer me." His voice sounded strained.

"Yes Jacob." I answered weakly, balling my fist in frustration but trying to help the situation by remaining calm.

"You will not deny or reject my kisses, I can kiss you in any part of your body I see fit and you will allow me access to your whole body. I can touch you, kiss you, smell or lick any part of your body. With us, there is no such thing as private parts, nothing is private, you are mine and I'm yours." I hoped he didn't expect me to willingly touch him, because I would rather chew my fingers off first.

"Yes Jacob." I felt my face burn as the anger I was feeling was reaching dangerous levels. Who the fuck does this idiot think he is?

"You will eat when I tell you; sleep when I tell you and when it comes to it, you will get on all fours, so I can fuck you as many times as I want. Understood?" I felt myself blanch at this last rule, when is he planning on finishing what he started? I was beyond nervous. But I had no option but to accept everything he was saying, I couldn't risk getting his wolf angry. I nodded in agreement.

"Now let's go downstairs, I made lunch" he motioned for me to follow him.

"Jacob"

"What is it Seth, don't start fucking with me, because I swear you'll regret it"

"I just need to go to the bathroom." I answered weakly; surprised at the fact that I didn't have a puddle around me caused by the fear combined with the urgency.

"Oh, go right now; I'll be waiting in the hallway. By the way, just so you know, the window in the bathroom is also nailed shut." He smirked, scoffing at my circumstances.

I walked to the bathroom fuming, my fists so tight I was starting to lose sensation. I heard something that sounded dangerously too much like a moan, looking back for a second I see Jake staring at my ass, a look of unadulterated lust on his face. I all but ran toward the bathroom closing the door behind me.

After I finished my business I washed my hands and splashed some water on my face. I looked at the image in the mirror noticing the bruises all over my face, the cut over my brow and the one on my lip were almost healed but still looked pink and standing out over my cooper skin. My nose was swollen and so was my lower lip. The most striking was the bruise on my neck that mimicked the shape and size of Jacob's hand perfectly.

My eyes looked dead and tired with dark circles under them. The person I was looking at was not a happy sixteen-year old; it was a tired old prisoner without the possibility of parole.

I followed Jacob downstairs and into the kitchen, he motioned for me to sit and I did. I felt so exposed walking around naked in this house, this is so fucking embarrassing. With every passing minute I hated him more.

He got something steaming hot from the microwave and placed it in front of me. I was pleased to see it was hot cocoa with mini marshmallows. How did he know I like to drink cocoa in the mornings? I never liked coffee, it's too bitter for my taste.

The cocoa tasted good, just the way I like it. He brought over two plates filled with scrambled eggs, bacon and toast. Placing one in front of me, he sat across from me with the other one. We ate in complete silence.

I didn't even dare to lift my eyes from my plate, afraid of making eye contact; any action had the potential of triggering another attack. I still managed to notice that he wasn't looking at me either; he was so concentrated on his food that you would think it was a difficult math problem. I was dumbfounded, here I was sitting across from him butt naked and he was not even looking at me. It made me very happy to see him so disinterested but this attitude was much unexpected.

We finished our breakfast/lunch and he took both our plates to the sink. I just sat there not knowing what to do or what to say, afraid of even moving.

"You want anything else Seth?" His tone was soft and gentle.

"May I have some water please?" Jacob took a glass filling it with water and bringing it over to the table.

"Thank you Jacob, for the water and for breakfast."

"No problem, I'm going to take care of you Seth, you'll see." I knew how he wanted to take care of me, with me on all fours while he pounded mercilessly into me. How can pretending to play house heal my physical and emotional injuries?

I didn't know what to say in reply, I didn't want him taking care of me. I had a family that loved me and cared for me, a family where I was free to speak without fear. This was just a completely unfortunate circumstance that my fucking destiny hit me with. Was this how my life was going to be from now on? With every passing minute death seemed to be a more attractive and dignified option than the life I was destined to live. I felt my chest getting tighter and the burning feeling in my eyes warned me that if I didn't distract myself I was going to start crying any minute.

"How did you know about the cocoa?" It was a stupid question but I thought it was neutral enough and I needed something to distract me, so I wouldn't cry.

"The what?" It was obvious my question caught him by surprise.

"How did you know I like hot cocoa with little marshmallows in the mornings?"

He chuckled probably amused by my childish inquiry.

"I asked Emily, she told me all your favorite foods and drinks, even your favorite color. That's why I painted our bedroom blue." Our bedroom ugh, the thought made me nauseous I hoped I wouldn't lose my lunch. I had to admit that it was sweet of him to ask about some of the things I like. I still thought he was a perverted bastard but a sweet one, if there was such a thing.

"Why did you ask her?"

Jacob seemed troubled with this question; I didn't know what to make of his reaction. Then I noticed the last thing I expected, he was blushing! His high cheekbones looked maroon with the blush that stained them.

"I want to be a good husband." He answered sheepishly.

That was also the last answer I expected to hear. He considered himself my husband? Was he fucking crazy, demented or mad? What a hypocrite, a good husband? After the way he treated me last night? Does that mean he saw me as his wife?

I almost yelled at him, but instead, without warning, a loud sob escaped from my throat and the tears I didn't notice forming in my eyes started rolling down my cheeks.

Jake approached me slowly kneeling in front of me. Instinctively I crossed my legs trying to conceal some of my nudity.

"Seth, baby, what is it?" His voice was a rushed whisper. Gently taking my hands and running his thumbs over my knuckles.

"Good husbands don't hit" was all I could say after taking a shuddering breath.

He looked like somebody hit him hard and pushed all the air out of him. His face was a mixture of pain, regret and fear. Letting go of my hands for a moment, Jake wiped some of the tears from my face and brought my face up to meet his eyes. I saw so much remorse, sadness and shame in those brown orbs glistening with the tears he was trying to hold back. I barely registered when he started talking, his voice so low it was barely a whisper.

"Seth, I can not even bring myself to ask for your forgiveness, because I know I don't deserve it. I'm so ashamed it hurts to look you in the eye. Is very hard to make myself look at you and see all the damage I caused. My actions last night have no excuse. You probably hate me so much right now and I don't blame you. Last night I was a monster, I acted out of pure instinct, following my most primitive needs." He bowed his head in shame and mortification; taking my hands he kissed them gently. Reminding myself to breath I closed my eyes trying to calm down.

My breath quickened when I felt his lips over my eyebrow, on the spot where his blow produced a gash just a few hours before. His lips trailed down my nose placing tender kisses on each bruise, ending on my lips.

"My beautiful Seth, what did I do to you?" It was a half choke, half whine; he looked intently at the bruises on my face with a pained expression, the anguish evident in his words and on his features. Brushing his fingers over my bruised skin he shook violently. I was immediately on alert, to put myself out of harm's way if he phased.

He gasped loudly when his eyes landed on my neck. Jacob brought his shaking hand to my neck and placed it over the bruise that was still very visible under my skin, matching the bruise to his hand. It was like he couldn't believe he inflicted all that damage and he needed to prove it to himself.

Jacob was looking at all the pain he caused, knowing he had gone too far. He almost killed me and all for what? For the right to fuck me? This was wrong any way you looked at it, this was not love; this was an obsession.

Taking a deep breath he pulled me toward him, pressing our warm foreheads together. He brushed his lips against mine, gently pressing his mouth to mine. I winced at the pain coming from my bruised lip.

"I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm so sorry baby." Jake moved back a little, inspecting my lip. He was now exploring my arms and legs, kissing each and every bruise I had on them. I felt very uncomfortable with all the kisses, but wouldn't dare move or tell him to stop. I was afraid of him, of his reaction, he seemed to be very unstable and anything could trigger another attack. I didn't want to get hit and I certainly didn't want to get raped. I knew it was only a matter of time before he attacked me again, but right now I was spent, I wouldn't be able to fight back in any way.

He placed his head on my lap and my whole body stiffened; that was, until I saw his shoulders shake gently and realized he was crying. His tears rolled down my thighs one after the other, it was like his soul was bleeding tears. It reminded me of that night a while ago when I came to return his phone and found him crying in his bedroom. The night that I stupidly, but voluntarily, stayed with him and shared his bed.

After several minutes, he pulled himself together and sat back wiping several tears from his face with the back of his hand. He was again looking directly into my eyes.

"Seth, I'm not going to make any false promises, I'm not going to bullshit you. The only thing I can swear to you at this moment is that I will NEVER hit you again. My hands will never find your skin in anger. I'll only touch you to caress you, to love you." His words sounded sincere, remorse evident in his words.

"Thank you Jake"

I didn't know how long we stayed in the same position; the only movement the blinking of our eyes and the rhythmic flow of our chests as we inhaled and exhaled. He kept looking into my eyes, expressing so many emotions and feelings that it was overwhelming. I knew he acted like a monster, but at the same time I couldn't deny that he was sincere and really regretted what he did. His attitude was that one of a sorrowful, regretful person. Nothing he did can be undone, but if everybody around me was correct and he was indeed my soul mate, I hoped that one day I would be able to forgive him and forget his horrible actions.

"C'mon let's go upstairs." Panic struck me, my breath escaping me fast and hard. How long did his resolve last? A couple of hours? Sure, he was not going to hit me, but he was still going to rape me. I was sure he heard my heartbeat pick up the second he spoke.

"Don't be scared puppy, we barely got any sleep last night and I don't know about you, but I need a nap. Also, sleeping will help you heal faster, I can't bear to look at your bruises anymore..." His voice trailed off and he gave a chocked sigh.

I began to stand up but felt my feet leave the floor as Jacob picked me up bridal style and started walking towards the stairs. He was right, I felt tired, my eyes were burning and my whole body was sore. I got nervous thinking that his arm was only inches away from my naked ass and shook slightly. He looked at me and must have seen the fear in my eyes.

"I told you not to be scared, I'm in control right now, we're only going to sleep, trust me."

Yeah right, trust him, easier said than done. It will be a cold day in hell before I can trust him. For now I thought he was being pretty decent and if this was one of the few moments of peace I'll experience I might as well enjoy it. Focused on the here and now I snuggled to his warm chest, the uneasiness I felt quickly draining away. I inhaled his woodsy scent; it had an amazingly calming effect on me and helped me relax even more.

He cradled me even closer to his chest and kissed the top of my head. After taking a few deep breaths I saw all the tension on his face melting away with each breath. We went inside our room and he placed me on the bed with unprecedented gentleness. It made me very nervous to be in the same room with him, but I tried to push that feeling aside. My heart skipped a beat when I saw him remove his pants, now he is naked, and I'm naked... oh shit, not again.

"Seth relax, man you're going to give yourself a heart attack." He sounded amused; now he was trying to be funny, what the fuck! How can I relax with a naked, hormonal pervert in the room with me?

He crawled on the bed next to me, laying on his side. On instinct I turned on my side to face him, there was no way I was having my naked behind near a very naked Jacob. He wrapped his warm arms around me and pulled me towards him. With a sad smile on his face he pushed my head to his shoulder. I tried to resist but felt him tensing up again, at this moment I thought it was better if I laid my head on his shoulder than risk giving his wolf an excuse to show up.

I couldn't help inhaling his scent again, moss and wildflowers, home and comfort, there was something so reassuring in his scent. I felt protected, unconditionally loved and desperately needed. I allowed all these feelings to wash over me, giving up with a sigh. Wrapping my arm around his waist I burrowed my face between his shoulder and his neck, almost like a puppy would do.

We were dangerously close, but felt right, like this was exactly the place I needed to be at this moment. I was letting go of my fear and allowing myself to trust him, even if it was for just a few minutes. With the hand of the arm I had around his waist I began rubbing lazy circles on his back. For the first time since I could remember he was being a perfect gentleman, making sure to keep our hips at a good distance and avoiding any uncomfortable contact between our sexes.

I closed my eyes and allowed myself to become enveloped in his warmth, mimicking my motion he ran his hand up and down my back. He was very gentle, making sure not to put any pressure on my bruised body, his caresses where like a balm on my battered flesh. I knew he caused all the bruises and was far from forgiving him. But at this moment, I needed to feel close to him, I needed to be comforted by him.

Jacob kissed the top of my head inhaling deeply.

"I love you Seth."

"I know Jacob." I knew this was not the answer he wanted to hear, but it was the only one I could give him. It would be a long time before I could have any feelings towards him, except hate and resentment. I knew this could slowly kill us both, robbing us of the possibility of having a happy life. I understood that if we were ever to have a chance, we needed to reach a compromise that included mutual respect and consideration.

For now I was going to live moment to moment and this was a good one. Tightening my arm around him for a moment I gave him a small hug. He didn't return the hug, knowing that it could hurt me. Jacob sighed deeply and swallowed several times before speaking.

"Thank you." His voice was thick with emotion.

"For what, Jake?" I was not aware of doing anything that merited a "thank you".

"For giving me a chance."

Dinner followed the same routine, Jacob cooking for us, telling me to eat and then carrying me back to the room. Any other time I would've complained about being controlled like this, but after everything that happened I really didn't care, I didn't feel like doing anything anyway.

To think that only twenty four hours ago my life was completely different, I was free, living with a family that loved me. Now I was the new toy of an unstable wolf that lived for the moment he could claim me.

Sunday morning came, bringing another rainy day. I rolled to my back blinking a few times, I was surprised to find myself alone on the bed since I was sure Jacob was going to come and sleep with me. I could hear his soft snores and his even heartbeat in the other room. Feeling an unfamiliar uneasiness I got out of bed and walked to the door. Wondering if I would be able to leave the room cautiously turned the doorknob and stepped out into the hallway, quickly realizing I could leave this prison.

Now what should I do? Jacob is asleep, if I was very quiet maybe I would be able to leave the house and by the time he notices I would probably be in Canada. If I run through some streams, my scent might fade enough to make it difficult for him to locate my scent, giving me more time to escape.

Then again what if I escape and he catches me, I know what will happen and it will be ten times worse than I could even imagine. I leaned against the door frame, thinking what I should do, try to escape or stay and try to earn my freedom. Like a prisoner offered the opportunity to either escape or wait for his parole I was conflicted. Am I losing my mind? How could I even think twice about not escaping, I should just go for it.

Against any logical thought I decided to stay and earn my freedom, I began walking towards the bathroom and found myself not touching the floor anymore. Massive arms around my waist crushing me, damn it; this will give me another new set of bruises.

"Where the hell do you think you're going? Trying to escape? How did you get out of the room? He screamed his questions one after the other, faster than I could answer, his arms so tight around my waist I was having difficulty breathing.

"You are not going to leave me, this is it, and here is where you submit Seth!" I felt myself tensing up at this statement; Jacob bent me over and started pushing his already hard cock between my bare buttocks.

"Jacob stop, I was only going to the bathroom!" I yelled as loud as my voice allowed.

"Stop please, look at the direction I was going, I was not escaping, believe me" he stopped and turned me around, I was now facing him. His face was red with anger, nostrils flared and a deep growl emerging from his chest. At least his eyes were not completely black that was good news.

"Please, believe me." I said shakily.

Jacob took a couple of staggering steps backwards, he stopped to look around. His eyes going from the bedroom door to where I was standing, I just stood there cursing the moment I decided to stay. I was so pissed; I'm such an idiot, why did I stay?

"I misjudged you."

That's all he could say? Sorry I almost raped you again but it was a small mistake on my part. Son of a bitch! I couldn't stand it anymore.

"You fucking idiot, I had the chance to escape but didn't and this is the reward I get?" I was fucking mad, mad at him, at myself, at my stupid decision to stay, at everything.

Jacob was shaking so hard he was starting to blur. All I saw before I closed my eyes tightly was Jacob lifting his arm and braced myself for what was coming, but never felt the impact. When I opened my eyes he was standing in front of me shaking, hands clamped together in front of him, deep frown on his face, his mouth tight. Suddenly he pulled me towards him and I felt my legs give under me, he held me up.

"I promised never to hit you again and I intend to keep that promise" he whispered on my ear.

"I'm sorry puppy, I have to trust you more." I was standing on my own now, but still felt my whole body shaking with anger and frustration. I felt so impotent, incapable of making any decisions, at the mercy of a demented, distrustful person.

"Go to the bathroom, I'll go downstairs and make breakfast." He said matter of fact like nothing happened.

How could he go from trying to ravage me to apologizing and making me breakfast in a matter of minutes? I can honestly say I was happy with how everything unfolded, but man, his mood swings were giving me an ulcer.

"Jacob, is it ok if I take a shower?" I was starting to smell funky, after all, I didn't shower yesterday and I've been sweating bullets on several occasions.

"Sure Seth, there are clean towels in the closet" He answered quickly but it sounded strange like he was out of breath. I walked to the bathroom fast before he changed his mind and came after me, when I turned around to close the door I caught a glimpse of Jake going into his room; mmm he does have a nice ass. What the... Seth Clearwater, you just didn't think ... ugh. I hit myself on the side of the head, embarrassed at my own thoughts

After my shower I walked downstairs and welcomed the smell of pancakes and sausage, chocolate chip pancakes to be exact. Again he motioned for me to sit down and we ate our breakfast in silence. I had to admit Jake was a good cook, almost as good as Emily. I lifted my eyes from my plate to find him watching me intently, his gaze soft and loving with a small smile on his face.

"What?" I asked, annoyed with myself for even caring.

"You were moaning while you ate your pancakes, are they that good?"

"Moaning? I didn't do it on purpose and the pancakes are very good by the way."

"Thank you, the sounds you were making were so alluring I had to stop eating and watch you." I was blushing furiously; I couldn't help but be flattered by his adoration, but at the same time an alarm was going off on my head, warning me about the way he was looking at me.

We finished our breakfast with me making a conscious effort not to make any sounds that could incite Mr. Horny Pants. I stood up to take my plate to the sink, but Jake took the plate from me.

"Go upstairs now Seth." There it was, another mood swing, now he was back to Mr. Bossy Alpha.

I was walking towards the stairs when I felt his hands on my shoulders spinning me around to face him. In a second his lips were on mine and he devoured my mouth moaning into the kiss. With his large hands he grabbed my ass squeezing each globe. Jake pushed his tongue into my mouth and explored every corner of it.

The rapidly forming bulge in his pants made me very nervous, especially when he started grinding his erection against me. The smell of his arousal hit me soon after. In one swift movement he separated from me.

"Go upstairs, right now." He said breathlessly.

I ran upstairs trying to put as much distance as I could between me and Jacob's erection. But had to stop in my tracks, when as I was turning to go inside the room, I caught the sight of Jacob with his pants around his ankles stroking himself furiously while holding on to the rail, his moans were loud and obscene.

I ran inside the bedroom, locking the door behind me and sitting on the floor in an attempt to keep him out of the room, if he decided he wanted me and not his hand. I could hear him clearly. "Oh Seth baby you feel so good" "Just like that suck my cock" "Ah you are such a good cocksucker puppy" "Mmmm I'm going to cum" "Ahhh you want it" "Fuck ...Seth"

There was silence after that and I breathed relieved that it was his hand and not my ass or my mouth making him cum. I heard him as he was coming upstairs; praying that he didn't come in the bedroom to make me do what he was fantasizing about. He walked past the bedroom and into the bathroom where I heard the shower running minutes after.

I unlocked the door before climbing up on the bed where at least I had the excuse of being under the covers to hide my body from his lustful stares. He brought me out of my thoughts when I heard him open the door; thankfully he was wearing a pair of blue basketball pants and a white wife beater.

He sat on the bed next to me and grabbed my hand interlacing our fingers.

"You probably heard me and I thought I should explain to you what happened."

"You don't need to explain anything Jacob, you got horny and well, took care of it." I didn't want him reliving what just happened and risking him getting aroused and making his fantasy a reality.

He smiled and kissed the fingers of the hand he was holding.

"You see baby, as you've probably seen, many of my fantasies revolve about you being wet, whether it is the rain or in the shower. When you asked if you could take a shower the memory of those fantasies hit me and I got the worse hard-on. I took care of it while you where taking your shower, but then you got me all riled up with your sexy moaning during breakfast. I had to use all my self control to stop myself from fucking you senseless. Shit Seth, without even trying you made me need to jerk off twice in less than a couple of hours." He chuckled at his admission.

"Sorry Jake, I didn't mean to." That was all could muster without allowing him to sense the disgust brewing inside me.

"You don't need to apologize; I just felt I needed to tell you, even though I'm pretty sure you heard me." He was the one blushing now.

"You don't need to tell me these things Jake, they are personal"

"That's the thing Seth, I want to be an open book with you, no secrets. I don't expect you to do the same, I would like you to, but I won't force you to tell me your private thoughts or feelings."

"Thanks I appreciate that" like I would even consider talking to him about my feelings. If I told him how I really felt about him he would either beat me to a pulp or fuck me without mercy. Neither one of those scenarios appealed to me, so it was better if I kept my big mouth shut.

"I'll be in the garage working on the truck, only leave this room to go to the bathroom. Be warned that I can hear very well and will be paying attention, so don't do anything stupid Seth."

"Sure, sure."

I found a good movie, it was a comedy and at least it took my mind off my shitty life for a couple of hours. When the movie was over I decided to take a nap. I was awoken by Jake coming in the room.

"Sorry I didn't mean to wake you up, just wanted to check on you. Do you need anything? Are you hungry or thirsty? I'm going to get dinner started but it's going to be at least forty-five minutes."

"I'm good, I don't have too much of an appetite"

I saw his face fall at my statement, what does he expect, for me to be dancing and jumping for joy?

We were interrupted by somebody knocking on the front door. Jake looked very annoyed and I had the feeling that whoever was knocking was going to regret coming here.

"Stay in the room Seth, I mean it, no tricks." He ordered. I would have no other choice than to comply unless I changed my mind and decided to fight the alpha order, I chuckled internally.

"What do you want?" Shit Jake sounded pissed, I wondered who it was.

"Before you even open your mouth, let me tell you something; he is staying here with me, where he belongs. You wasted your time coming here; go back to your house."

"Jake, I only want to know how he is doing." It was Sam's voice, it sounded flat and devoid of emotion, like when his expression was like this, it was a sign he was angry.

"He is fine, leave now." Damn it Sam, just leave, you're making him angry.

"Can I see him? Leah is very worried about him; I had to put an order on her to prevent her from coming here."

"You can't see him. You can tell Leah he is fine, but that you couldn't see him because he couldn't come downstairs."

"Why can't he come downstairs?"

"Let's say I was a little rough, he can't walk right now, hopefully if I give him a little time to recover he may be able to walk again in a few days. But I don't know about that Sam, your little brother is just too delicious." Jake said this in a sinister tone.

I heard my brother inhale sharply, I'm sure he would've hit him if he could have been sure Jacob wouldn't take his anger out on me.

"Now leave Sam, I think your brother's ass is calling me and I need to fuck it again."

"Jake please he is just a kid, don't hurt him anymore."

"Sam, this is your fault, you made me wait three fucking months, now I have a lot of time to make up for. Now get out of here." Sam sighed in defeat.

"I almost forgot, here are some of his clothes, he only has the clothes he was wearing on his birthday"

"He doesn't need any clothes right now, but if he ever leaves our room he might. I'll keep them just in case."

I heard Jacob close the door and after several minutes he walked upstairs. I was fuming, how he dared tell my brother all those lies. That mother fucking bastard made Sam believe he claimed me, why?

"Not a word Seth, I know you heard everything." Jake warned me in a serious tone.

"Yes I did, how could you tell my brother all those fucking lies?" I was furious and all thoughts of remaining calm for my butt's sake went out the window.

"You will not question my reasons Seth"

"You will not question my reasons" I repeated his words mocking him, sounding like a combination of The Terminator and Darth Vader.

"Don't mock me!" he screamed loudly.

"Then man up to your reasons!" I was also screaming.

"I don't owe you any explanations." He was not screaming anymore, but his whole body was shaking, a clear indication that he was furious.

"Yes you do, it's my fucking life you're talking about, to my fucking brother."

"Watch your tone Seth"

"I'm not going to watch anything, I'm sick and tired of you telling me what to do and you're not the boss of me."

"I'm not your boss, I'm your mate and right now you're pissing me off."

"We'll, you've been pissing me off for the last three months."

"Shut up Seth."

I knew I should've kept my mouth shut; I must lack the gene for self-preservation. The words were out of my mouth before I had time to do censor myself.

"Make me."

The look on his face went through a series of transformations from surprised, to angry, to diabolical. He lunged himself in my direction with all his strength. Making use of my speed; I jumped out of the bed. He landed on his hands and knees lifting his face to look at me, a feral growl coming out of him.

Seth Clearwater, you did it now, you couldn't keep you big mouth shut and now your ass will pay for it. Remembering his last order didn't have the double timbre of the alpha command, I made a run for it, going into the hallway. Just as I was going to take off running downstairs I felt his hand on my shoulder holding me in place. Damn it, another bruise, the fucker sure had a strong grip. He snaked his other arm around my waist and dragged me into the bedroom.

We both fell on top of the bed; I was on my stomach with my body completely covered by his. I froze when I saw his clothes hit the floor beside the bed. Who was going to save me from this one? This was entirely my fault; all I had to do was shut my mouth. He didn't even react to my initial outburst, he just responded to my challenge. What was I thinking?

"Seth you brought this upon yourself, I gave you several chances but you just don't know when to quit." The worse thing about this was that he was right.

He was laying on my back grinding himself on my exposed behind. I could feel his hard length being rubbed on my crack. With his dick buried lengthwise on my crack he bent forward and kissed the back of my neck. Jake ran his tongue on my ear and continued on my throat, moaning when he found that spot between my neck and my shoulder.

"This is where my mark will be." His voice was deep and husky.

"Jake I'm sorry, I'm sorry, please don't do it." I had to try, even if I had to beg.

"No need to apologize baby, you just gave me an excuse to do what I've been dying to do for months. I wasn't even that angry, you were just acting your age, but you challenged me and that's something I will not have."

"Please Jake give me a chance."

"No more chances." His voice sounded surprisingly calm, after my challenge I assumed he would've been furious, but he was at most, slightly annoyed.

With these words he leaned back spreading my butt cheeks with his hands. I felt the cold air on my hole and shuddered with fear and embarrassment.

"Damn it Seth you look good enough to eat. It's a shame that when I'm done with you this little hole won't be so tight anymore."

I felt him rub my hole with his finger circling it and I knew this was going to happen; my own mouth defeated me. If I would've stopped talking when I had the chance I wouldn't be in this predicament. I just became my own worse enemy. Hiding my face in the pillow I tried to drown the sob that was threatening to leave my lips.

He rubbed the head of his cock up and down my crack several times before stopping on my hole. I stayed very still tensing my whole body; I couldn't help my reaction as it was a result of the intense fear and regret.

"Jake please, forgive me, it will not happen again, I promise."

"What do you promise Seth?"

"I will not disrespect you again, I will not challenge you and I'll be good."

"That's not good enough; you need to do better than this."

"I'm sorry Jake, if you want me to I'll get on my knees and beg for forgiveness, I promise, just please don't hurt me."

"You're willing to humiliate yourself just so I won't fuck you?"

"Yes I'll do it"

I felt his weight off me and he sat on the bed pulling me to his lap. I buried my face on his chest bawling, making a deplorable spectacle of myself.

"Shh shh calm down, you're going to make yourself sick. I won't hurt you, stop crying."

After a while my sobs where reduced to whimpers and I was able to speak again.

"Thank you."

"Seth, you are running out of chances, one more strike and you'll get it. By the way, you didn't apologize yet like you said you would."

I berated myself for making that promise, but it probably saved me. I had to humiliate myself in front of the almighty alpha, in my mind I weighed both sides of my situation. On one hand doing this was going to rob me of the little dignity I had left. On the other hand Jacob fucking me and making me his bitch would be far worse.

I got off the bed slowly; Jake swung his long legs to the side of the bed facing me. Taking a deep breath I kneeled in front of him, hands by my sides and eyes on the floor.

"Jake please forgi..." I couldn't finish, I felt my body leave the floor and fall on his lap.

"I couldn't let you do it Seth, I wanted to humiliate you, to teach you a lesson, but couldn't bring myself to let you do it." His hands felt shaky, as he held me on his lap with them around my waist.

This was something that caught me completely by surprise I looked at him inquisitively and he continued.

"You are my mate, not my servant or my slave. You are the mate of an alpha, you kneel for nobody."

He placed me on the bed and stood up; collecting his clothes from the floor he walked toward the door. He did his already famous looking over the shoulder trying for a dramatic exit and said something that made my mouth drop and my blood boil.

"By the way I had no intention of claiming you just now; I was in control the whole time. But what I said about kneeling is true don't ever do it. I hope you learned your lesson puppy." He winked and blew me a kiss. Closing the door behind him and leaving me sitting on the bed furious.


	22. Chapter 22 Cruel and unusual punishment

**Disclaimer:** **I don't own any of the characters, Stephenie Meyer created them, I only use them to please my over active imagination.**

Chapter 22 Cruel and unusual punishment

I had been in this prison for one week, succumbing more into despair with each passing day. I realized that my life had been reduced to a series of scenes in a macabre play which main idea was the destruction of somebody's soul through separation, pain and loneliness. My world had been reduced to four blue walls; I was completely isolated from the external world. Everything that I ever cared about was unreachable, like there was a huge precipice separating me from any chance at happiness.

Jacob failed to realize that this separation instead of making me submit, was feeding the rage and the hate inside my soul. He claimed to love me but kept me confined to these four walls, showing a complete lack of respect for me as a person and absolute distrust. In some twisted way, I understood his reasons; why he didn't trust me, if I had the chance, I would turn tail and run away from here, disappearing forever and he knew it.

My routine was pretty much the same each day, wake up, eat, watch television, eat again and go to sleep. Now I couldn't even go downstairs to eat, since his father came back I had been limited to the second floor of the house.

Since his father's return I heard their heated discussions in hushed tones, unsuccessfully trying to prevent me from hearing. Apparently they failed to remember that even though I might be a runt, I was still a shape shifter and my wolf hearing was excellent. Billy was worried about the strain in their finances caused by my presence in this house. I wished Jacob would listen to his father for once in his life and allowed me to go back home.

Billy blamed me for his son dropping out of high school. Jacob tried to explain to him that he would've drop out anyway, he didn't like school and with all his responsibilities as alpha and the youngest chief ever of this reservation it was just too exhausting. I knew where Billy was coming from and he was just looking for another excuse to hate me, like he needed any more.

Jacob kept true to his promise to not hit me again, at least so far. The bruises that adorned my skin for several days were completely gone. But his attempts against my virginity continued. More than once I had been walking to the bathroom only to be slammed against the wall, with a very hot body pressed against my back, rubbing his eternally present erection on my naked ass. I got it! I belonged to him and just my scent made him horny, I just wished he would stop repeating the same inane monologue each time he molested me.

At least he didn't sleep with me; it was odd that when I was living at home he forced me to sleep with him every fucking night, his arms around me, choking the life out of me. My only guess was that now he felt I couldn't escape and didn't have the support and protection of my family to help me get away from him. Even his forced make out sessions decreased. Hopefully he was loosing interest, I doubt it, but one could dream, right?

Jake spent every free moment he had with me. He was trying to get to know me, even though I was not very receptive. Still, I had to admit that I was feeling more relaxed and comfortable with him. We sat together on the bed watching television, usually holding hands the whole time. Sometimes he would slide down and rest his head on my shoulder and I heard him sigh, content and relaxed. We laughed at the same stupid things and groaned annoyed at the same commercials. We could talk for hours or before exhaustion got the best of him and he would fall asleep. He listened to every stupid thing I said like it was a fundamental truth of the universe; I found his behavior very amusing and a little crazy.

Today the pack was going to have their first meeting since Jacob came back. I was excited when he told me the pack was coming to the house; after all I had not seen anybody in over a week.

"You can't come to the meeting Seth." When he came in the room that afternoon I was excited, thinking he was bringing me clothes so I could attend the meeting. To my not so big surprise he informed me that I couldn't even go downstairs.

"Why not?" I felt completely aggravated, unable to understand the reasons for his order.

"I don't want you to; you don't have my authorization to go downstairs."

"And since when..." I stopped mid-sentence when Jake gave me a warning look, I was quickly getting out of line and I was going to regret it.

"You will not come downstairs under any circumstance during the meeting. Is that clear?"

"Sure, sure" I was indignant, I wanted to rebel against all this control. I felt like a puppet, and he was the puppeteer holding the strings of my life. Telling me what to eat, who to talk to and even what to think. He had taken the thing that I valued the most, my freedom. I wasn't even allowed to see my family or wear clothes for that matter.

He just left the room not even looking back to assess my reaction; he was in too much of a hurry to get away from me.

I couldn't control the sobs that came out of my mouth as I cried uncontrollably for the umpteenth time in the last week. I stayed on the bed with my face buried on the pillow angry at myself, embarrassed at my weakness. If I were stronger, the situation would be very different and I wouldn't be in this predicament. If I was a strong dominant wolf, he couldn't abuse me or keep me as his prisoner. I chuckled internally when the image of Jacob in all fours as I rammed into him popped into my head.

I heard the voice of my pack mates as one by one they trailed into the house. The first one to arrive was Quill, his voice cheery as he greeted his alpha.

"Hey man, long time no see, how are you doing?"

"I'm good, happy to be back." Jake sounded sincere.

"Jake and hum, how is ...you know... Seth?" The fear and hesitation on Quil's voice was painfully evident. He was afraid to ask about me.

"He is fine Quil, before you ask, you can not see him and nobody is going upstairs."

"Ok Jake, whatever you say." He knew it would be wise to drop the subject. Nobody wanted to risk getting the alpha angry, especially our slightly disturbed one.

The next one to arrive was Jared, followed by Embry and Brady, with another round of greetings and some more reluctant questions about me. I could detect the annoyance in Jake's voice whenever anybody asked about me.

In the short period of time I had been living with him I learned to recognize Jacob's mood on his voice and even on his stance when he came in the room. I also noticed that even if he walked through the door looking angry, when he locked eyes with me his expression would soften considerably. I could notice the tension on his broad shoulders and even on his neck. The rigidity in his face twisted his beautiful features making him look old and tired. Wait a minute; did I describe Jacob as beautiful? Gross, this imprisonment was definitely affecting me.

I guessed that getting to know him better and identifying his reactions was important for me to know. It had proven itself useful especially since I had been doing the impossible not to get him angry and it seemed to deter his attacks against my virtue.

Sometimes I would briefly feel the need to help him, to do anything I could to help him relax. But then I remembered what would relax him the most and any intention of helping him disappeared.

The last ones to arrive were Sam, Leah and Paul. Sam's polite attempt to greet the alpha sounded very austere, Leah and Paul were completely silent. Apparently Leah was carrying a container with cookies and the pack reacted like the hungry wolves they were.

"Back off! Don't you dare touch these cookies, they are for my brother. Emily baked them for him." It was evident by Leah's voice that she was very frustrated.

Emily's cookies, a little piece of heaven; I loved my sister-in-law. Hopefully Leah would be able to keep the pack's paws off them. I knew Jacob would approve since he feeds me very well, at least it was not a cake with a file hidden inside it.

Everybody went silent but I couldn't even guess what was going on in the living room. It couldn't be good since several hearts were beating so fast I thought that at any moment somebody was going to explode.

"Leah, I'll make sure he gets them." This time it was Jacob's voice, flat, without any inflection at all.

"I'll rather give them to him myself." Her voice sounded strained, I knew she was making a monumental effort not to attack him and try to rip out his miserable throat.

"It's not going to happen Leah, nobody is going to see him." Jacob was starting to raise his voice.

"We'll see about that." Leah sounded defiant, very much like I sounded most of the time.

"Leah, that can be discussed after the meeting, lets start." Sam's voice had a blanket of calmness that was barely able to mask the fury inside him.

"Thanks Sam, well guys and Leah, as you know already, I'm back." There was cheering and clapping by some of the members of the pack. I knew very well which members of the pack were not clapping.

"During my absence Sam took over the pack as alpha, from this moment on I relieve him from that position and the responsibilities it involves. From now on until further notice you will answer to me. Is that clear everybody?" There were various voices accepting this decree.

"Sam, I want to thank you for everything, you took over the pack doing an excellent job and covered my patrols. Also I want to apologize for everything that happened the night I came back." Jacob Black apologizing for being an asshole? That's unheard of, he must be planning something.

"I know that you may not be able to find it in your heart to forgive me, but at least try to understand me, even if it's just a little bit."

"Leah, I know that right now you hate me, but believe me I hate myself even more." Who the fuck is this? Did I move into an alternate universe where Jacob had a shred of humanity in that cold heart of his, where he didn't act like the omnipotent alpha, who thought he could manipulate people's minds and bodies any way he wanted?

Regardless of how I felt about Jacob, I had to admit it took guts to apologize to my family. I felt proud of him, maybe he was taking a turn for the best and would start acting more human. If he asked me I could give him a few suggestions, he could start by letting me go.

"Paul I'm not sorry for breaking your jaw and your ribs. You deserved it and you know very well why. I just hope we can put this unfortunate incident behind us and work as a team and as pack brothers." I chuckled at this statement, Jacob's feelings toward Paul where so transparent anybody could see he detested him. I didn't know how Paul felt about his alpha, but it was probably in that same neighborhood. One thing was certain Paul was partially responsible for the incident on the cliffs and he knew it.

"Finally, all of you asked me about Seth; he lives here with me now, as my mate. He is in no condition for visits at this moment, so they will have to wait. That's all I'm going to say about it." To a human, the living room would seem so quiet you could hear a pin drop. To me, it was a symphony of heartbeats and breathing sounds, almost gasps, every single time my name was mentioned.

"Now, pack business. Sam, I decided you deserve to rest and be able to spend time with Emily. You are officially on vacation from patrols for the next month. I'll distribute your patrols among the others taking most of them myself." This bit of news was very exciting, if Jacob was going to be patrolling more often, covering all his patrols plus Sam's, he was not going to be around that often to harass me.

"Why Jake? Don't take me wrong, I'm not complaining but I'm curious at why are you doing this." Sam did not even try to hide his distrust.

"Sam, I just owe you too much." there was absolute silence after this statement, nobody daring to ask him to explain or elaborate.

"I was already filled in on the leech activity we had during my absence. Since it's been pretty quiet the patrols will be cut down by an hour for each shift" a round of enthusiastic cheers blasted in the living room.

He proceeded to distribute the patrol schedules and discuss the possible date for the summer bonfire that both Brady and I were supposed to attend for the first time since joining the pack.

"I guess that's all, those of you who have patrol go on and the rest go do whatever you do."

"Wait, there is no food? When we have the meeting at Sam's house Emily always has a snack for us." Jared was being his usual stupid self.

I heard Jacob's laughter, wow I never heard him laugh before, when he was with me he was always tense or horny, sometimes a combination of both. It resonated throughout the house and was soon joined by some of my pack mates. At least the pack was getting along, that was important for our reservation as our priority was to protect our families and friends.

"No food here, go home Jared." He sounded very amused.

I heard all the footsteps, as one by one they left, some through the front door, some through the back door. I guessed the ones leaving through the backdoor were going on patrol. The ones leaving through the front door going home to their loved ones. They had no idea how lucky they were; they were free to come and go as they pleased. Freedom is a commodity we don't appreciate until it's taken away from us.

"Jake, please we need to see him; you said you owe me, so I'm calling you on it. Allow us to see Seth." Sam was trying to convince Jacob to grant permission for him to come see me. Good luck, it would be easier to get an audience with the Pope.

"No, go home." Answered Jacob dryly.

"Why, Jake? Give me a good reason why we can't see him." Leah's tone was demanding, laced with the hatred that invaded her hearth for anything related to her alpha.

"Because I say so, he is my mate and my submissive. What I say goes, he is learning this and so will you." Jacob sounded very annoyed.

"Jake, he has been your mate for three months, but he has been our brother for sixteen years. We've never gone so long without seeing him or talking to him. We are all that's left of our family; don't take him away from us." Leah was pleading to Jacob in a way that I never thought she would be capable of.

After that there was only the sound of some rushed whispers that I couldn't understand and the shuffling of steps coming up the stairs. My heart leapt for joy as I caught Leah's and Sam's scent, hiding my naked body under the covers I waited for them, the anticipation making my heart beat so fast and loud, it was deafening.

I heard the doorknob turning and the door opened slowly. My brother and sister stood hesitantly by the door before walking in. Sam walked in first, followed immediately by Leah. I couldn't contain myself and kneeled on the bed holding the bed sheet around my waist and hugged my sister with one arm. I didn't remember ever being so happy to see them.

Leah sat on the bed and Sam kneeled next to the bed. He had a tortured look on his face and for some reason Leah wouldn't look me in the eye.

"Guys I'm ok, you can relax." I said this trying to ease the tension in the room. I didn't know how long they would be allowed to stay; I didn't want to spend that time worried and tense.

"Sam, why don't you sit on the bed, as you can see it's huge, there is plenty of room." I patted the area of the bed in front of me enthusiastically.

"Jacob warned me not to sit on the bed; he doesn't want the scent of another male on the bed you share with him." He flinched when he mentioned that this was the bed I shared with Jake. There was so much raw emotion in his eyes, rage and resentment toward his alpha, evident even in the way he said his name.

"At least grab the chair from the desk and get comfortable. I missed you guys, how is everything? How is Emily?"

"Everything is ok, we've missed you too. Emily wanted to come see you, but we agreed it was better if she waited." Leah was running her fingers through my hair with a look of pity in her eyes that broke my heart.

"Leah, please don't look at me like that, it makes me feel worse."

"I'm sorry Seth; it's that I'm so sorry this happened to you. Never in a million years had I thought he would behave this way." Said Leah with teary eyes.

She looked away, running her hand over her face in an attempt to wipe away the tears before I caught a glimpse at them. When she looked back her eyes looked clear but her voice sounded thick with all the tears she was holding back.

"Seth, can I ask you something? It's kind of personal, I don't want to make you feel uncomfortable."

"What is it Leah? You never been shy with your words before don't start now please."

"Why are you naked?" She motioned toward my back where anybody sitting where she was could clearly see part of my behind and the beginning of my crack.

"Oh that... you noticed." I felt my face burn with the blushing that probably covered it, I pulled the bed sheet and wrapped it in a way what it was bunched up on my back as well.

"I'm not allowed to wear clothes; the closet and the drawers are empty. I know Sam brought some of my clothes, but I don't know what Jake did with them." I said this bluntly, looking directly into my sister's eyes. I wanted to share with her some of my humiliation; I shouldn't do this, but all this felt so heavy, I needed somebody to share it with or it was going to crush me.

"But why?" Leah's eyes looked dark with anger and frustration; I felt the bed beginning to shake.

Sam was the one who answered Leah's last question.

"Is a way of making Seth submit; he is not allowed to have any possessions. This way he depends on Jacob for everything." Sam paused to take a calming breath and continued "Seth I'm the one curious now, I don't mean to pry but you still smell like you."

"What do you mean Sam?" I was dumbfounded, I had no idea what Sam meant by this.

"Your scent has not changed, when imprints consummate their relationship their scents mix. Each one retains his or her own, but it's easy to recognize their mate's scent mixed in. But you only smell like you, I can smell Jacob's scent in the room and on you, but is not mixed.

"That's because we didn't consummate anything. He didn't claim me." I said this with a slight hint of victory in my voice; I knew that I was at risk every second of every day, but for now I was still Seth, not Jacob's bitch.

"WHAT!" Both Leah and Sam screamed at the same time scaring the crap out of me.

"What I said, Jake didn't rape me; he almost did the night of my birthday and several times after, but agreed to give me time."

"Shit Seth, I was wondering why you didn't have a mating mark, I just guessed it was in a spot that was not very visible" Leah's face was beaming and a smile I haven't seen in a long time adorned her face.

Sam was smiling too, suddenly looking younger with the happiness he was experiencing. I couldn't help but smile myself, joining my siblings in their silent celebration.

"Seth, you said Jake agreed to give you time, but for what?" Leah couldn't help feeling curious about her alpha's change of heart.

"Time for me to fall in love with him, so I will give myself voluntarily." I felt my face fall; the short lived happiness leaving my soul like it was being chased away by the bitterness and anger that resides there.

"Do you think that will ever happen?" It was an honest question for which I didn't have an honest answer. My mind screamed at me that it was completely impossible, but another part of me, one that I chose to ignore, was telling me that there was a possibility of it happening. Sometimes I thought it was my wolf trying to get me to succumb to her wishes, she wanted Jacob's wolf and was trying to get me to accept the mating.

"I don't know guys; right now I'm living day to day, surviving in this prison." I looked around at the blue room that made up my world right now. I decided that would be a safe answer to give since Jacob was probably listening to our conversation. It was vague enough that I wouldn't lie to my siblings or to myself and wouldn't ignite the anger of my warden.

"I have to admit that Jake has been pretty decent so far, he is controlling himself better and I'm learning to also control my temper so I don't give his wolf any excuse to come out."

"I don't see any bruises on you; he doesn't use physical punishment to make you submit?" Sam's question caught me by surprise, but it shouldn't have. He saw everything that happened in his house and probably thought that the abuse continued once we were in the privacy of his home.

"He did hit me again once when we got here, the night he kidnapped me, but has not done it again. Actually he promised not to hit me ever again and even when I tested his patience and disrespected him he stayed in control." I was angry at myself for feeling proud of Jacob's accomplishments in this aspect of our life. I couldn't lie to my family, that would only hurt them and I didn't want that.

"He didn't claim you and is not hitting you..." Sam's voice was nothing more than a whisper; he was talking to himself, trying to wrap his mind around everything I told him. His face looked serene, actually is the calmest I had seen him since the imprinting occurred.

"No Sam, like I said he has been pretty decent. Makes sure I eat, keeps the room clean, he even went as far as asking Emily what my favorite foods are and even my favorite color." I sounded too damn proud of my captor; suddenly embarrassment at my own feelings engulfed me.

"I wonder why he told me all those horrible things about him being rough and you not being able to walk."

"He was just messing with you, he was angry that you tried to protect me, also he doesn't want to look weak in front of the pack."

The three of us turned our heads toward the door at the same time only to see Jacob walking in, holding a container of what I could only guess were the cookies.

"Guys I said five minutes, you have to leave."

"Jake, please they just got here and I've missed them so much. Let them stay a little bit longer please." He had an agonized look in his face, by looking at him I knew he was going to deny my plea. Every time he denied me anything he got the same troubled look in his face. I remembered Jacob telling me that an imprint couldn't deny anything to his imprinted. Now I understood how tormenting it was to him to deny me anything.

"Seth, no, they have to leave now, don't make me regret my decision of allowing them to see you." He tried to sound stern but I knew his voice by now and he was struggling with his decision.

I whimpered in defeat, I knew it was no use to beg, his mind was made up. I wrapped my arms around Leah's neck hugging her tightly; I didn't care if the sheet that was covering me fell off. But it didn't fall off; actually it felt tighter around my waist. With the corner of my eye I saw Jacob holding the cloth tightly around me, his eyes fixated on the floor. We stayed in our embrace as long as we could. When we separated I saw the wet spots my tears left on her shirt, and saw Leah run her hand over her face trying to wipe her own tears away. Sam gave me a weak smile that didn't reach his eyes and only waved goodbye, as he was not allowed to touch me.

Sam turned towards Jacob, the tension in the room was almost visible, and Sam's face looked tense, his eyes defensive, his lips pressed into a thin line. Jacob's reaction to my brother's body language was immediate, placing the container on the side table, he stood defensively and ready for whatever Sam was going to do. Sam surprised all of us by simply extending a hand and saying "thank you". His voice was low and neutral. Jacob shook his hand and nodded as his only response.

After watching my family exit the room I just collapsed on the bed, cursing fate for screwing with me in this unusual and cruel way. The loneliness that inhabited my life and my heart was even more prevalent after having contact with my family. It was short; too short, I barely had time to talk to them, to let them fill me with the sense of family we always shared. To help me feel that even though I was isolated they were still with me.

I curled my body into a ball and for lack off a better way to release my pain I cried. Deep sobs escaped my chest and my tears resembled an endless waterfall of bitterness.

Then warm arms lifted me off the bed into his lap and he cradled me like a mother would cradle her baby. I buried my face on his chest and washed it with my tears.

"Please Jacob, let me go home" my voice was coming out in whooping sobs.

"This is your home Seth." He tried to sound calm, but it was evident he was in distress. I could hear his heart beating a lot faster that usual.

"I want to be with my family."

"I'm your family now, I'm going to be your husband, I truly believe that one day you will love me and accept our relationship." He was speaking with a brittle voice, emotion evident in every word.

"I won't be able to love you, if you keep me as your prisoner, feeding my hate and resentment towards you." I was barely able to speak, my throat felt tight, my voice was very low and strained.

"Seth, don't say you hate me, please." His voice cracked and a chocked sigh escaped his throat, he buried his face on my hair while his whole body shook.

"It's the truth Jake; I don't want to be here. You brought me here against my will and are forcing me to stay. Why are you treating me like this? What did I ever do to you?" My voice was thick and I kept choking on my words, but I forced myself to speak, I was determined to make him see me as a person, not as a possession.

"Seth, I wish I was a better person and could let you go, but I can't." The pain and self-loathing evident on his face and the tone of his voice.

"I wish I could go back in time and meet you, without the imprint affecting my judgment. I would ask you on a date, we could go to the movies or just take a walk on the park, getting to know each other. Feel butterflies in my stomach the first time I hold your hand or when I steal my first kiss." His eyes were closed; I imagined he was playing the different scenarios in his head.

"In time, I'll creep into your heart little by little, until one day you realize you love me." He stopped and took a deep breath, his expression was tortured.

"Then we live happily ever after." He chuckled lightly at the cheesy comment.

"Jake, we can start again, I promise I won't escape and you know I'm already giving you a chance." I felt bad lying to him like this, especially at this moment when he was very vulnerable. But I had to; if I was going to get out of this prison I needed to trick the warden.

"It's not that easy, what am I supposed to do with the demands of my wolf?" He looked directly into my eyes and staring into those deep brown desperate eyes, I was able to take a peek into his tortured soul. I knew his wolf was brutal and could not even fathom the idea of having a creature like that inside of me. I guessed that was why our magic chose Jacob to bear that burden, only somebody as strong as my mate could handle a vicious, cruel creature like his wolf.

"We'll work it out, I promise, please let me go home. Not even your father wants me here."

"Don't pay attention to anything Billy says, I'll deal with him."

"Trust me Jake I won't abandon you." I straightened up on his lap and touched his cheek; I felt the moisture from the few tears he had allowed to escape. He covered my hand with his and closing his eyes he leaned against my touch.

He looked so vulnerable, no hint on his face of the dominating, arrogant alpha. In that fleeting moment I saw a glimpse of the real Jacob Black. The person that helped Sam and Emily, the one who is passionate about the safety of our tribe, but especially, the one who loved me. Jacob took my hand and kissed it tenderly, looking at me with those tortured and sad eyes. I could loose myself in those deep pools of sorrow, they are deep and penetrating; I felt like he was looking directly at my soul. Agony veiled his beautiful eyes and his jaw became tense.

"It's not a matter of trust Seth; I wish I could let you go, to let you have your own life without me pestering you. To allow you to be happy with whomever you choose and conform to watching you from a distance, certain that I did the right thing." His breathing was coming in shallow pants, his expression completely different, he looked in pain, like somebody reached into his body and ripped part of his soul away; leaving the shell of a person that will forever be incomplete.

"But I can't Seth, I just can't let you go, I'm afraid that if I did, that it might kill us both, you don't understand, I need you as much as I need the air I breathe and I know to some extent you need me too." He pulled me toward him, crushing me with his embrace. His whole body shaking violently but not the type of shaking that will result in him phasing, it was different and it felt like his shaking was caused by fear.

"Why kill us Jake?" I've heard this before from my wolf but I needed to hear it again, even if it was to convince myself.

"Because our bond is too strong to ignore, even though you cannot imprint on me or anybody else for that matter, just the fact that we are both shifters make our bond one of the strongest ones in nature."

"Your body is as hungry for me, as mine is for yours. I'm sure you feel the pull toward me even if you don't recognize it or fail to acknowledge it." He cupped my face between his strong callous hands, looking at me lovingly. He leaned down and gave me a chaste kiss.

"What do you mean by pull?" I had no idea what he was talking about and had to ask.

"It's a weird sensation on your chest. It hurts when you are away from your imprint usually disappearing when you are close." He placed his hand on my chest making me remember all the times I asked myself what could be causing that unexpected and sudden pain. I recalled that it started the day we went cliff diving and he left.

"That's what the annoying pain was? Another side effect of this damn imprint?"

"Please Seth don't talk that way about our imprinting. I know you hate it, but it has been the best thing to ever happen to me." He had a faint a smile on his lips and a pleading tone in his voice.

"I can't help it, if it wasn't for the imprint you wouldn't even turn to look in my direction. I could go back to being invisible."

"That's were you are mistaken my beautiful Seth. I loved you for a long time before the imprint happened. Do you remember how I used to visit your house all the time with the excuse of talking to Sam? The only reason I went to your house was to see you, I don't remember exactly when I started having feelings towards you, but I'm sure it was years before the imprint happened."

"That's why I can't let you go; I love you and can't live without you. Maybe I'm being selfish and that makes the way I love you completely wrong. But I believe there is no right or wrong way to love somebody, you just love with all you heart, soul and strength. You give yourself completely to the other person, that's how I love you Seth, my heart is yours and I'm begging you to please accept it." At this admission I felt a rumble in his chest and the warm droplets fell lazily on my head. He held me tight; like he was afraid I was going to take off running.

I was floored; he secretly loved me for years. I couldn't wrap my mind around the idea of Jacob being in love with me since we were kids. For years I had been secretly jealous of his physique, silently wishing to have at least one third of his good looks and now he is the one who is always calling me beautiful. But this went beyond liking, he was irrevocably in love with me, I couldn't deny the reality of Jacob's love. If things would've happened differently without the imprint influencing us, would I have fallen in love with him?

I didn't dare to move, all the power of Jacob's declaration banging on my head like a sledgehammer. I thought he loved me, but never understood how strong his feelings toward me were. I was taken aback by the fact that he even considered the idea of forgoing the imprint and letting me go. Even if that was a possibility and we could dissolve the bond, I knew he would still get hurt; he was already in love with me.

That day my view of Jacob Black changed, we were both victims, he was no longer my warden but a fellow prisoner. We were both at the mercy of the magic that first created us, and then made us bond, in a way that neither one of us would've thought possible. The only difference was that while he welcomed the bond, I rejected it with all my strength.

I couldn't do anything about my feelings, it was beyond my control. I still felt I hated him; the only difference was that now I felt remorse for doing so. I knew that every hurtful word hurts him deeply, every time I rejected him, his heart bled. Shit now I was really screwed, at least before, I felt no remorse, now it was digging at my soul like a white hot dagger.

Eventually I felt Jacob calm down, his breathing was calm and his heartbeat regular. For a moment I thought he had fallen asleep. I looked up and immediately found his eyes looking at me, with an adoration I did not deserve.

"I thought you've fallen asleep, I didn't want to wake you." He ran his index finger very gently over my face, starting on my left temple and ending on my lips, he traced the outline of my lips and this action made my whole body shiver.

"I thought the same thing." I chuckled lightly at the absurdity of the situation.

He cupped my cheek gently allowing his hand to wander toward my neck where I smiled when he tickled me lightly. His gaze followed his hand to my chest and my abdomen; with his index finger he traced each of my muscles. I stiffened when I saw his gaze go lower and a look of pure admiration on his eyes. Jacob licked his lips and swallowed loudly, for the first time I didn't know what to do, he disarmed me with his confession and now I felt lost. He must have sensed my nervousness or maybe he just heard my heart pick up, placing one hand on my hip with his other hand he lifted my chin to make me look at him.

"Seth I want you, like I've never wanted anything in my life, I want your body, but I want your heart even more. Just know that I'm doing everything I can to control my impulses, I don't want to hurt you."

"Thank you Jake." I felt so close to him, he bared his soul to me like nobody ever. Leaning towards him I rested my head on his chest enjoying the rhythmic beat of his heart, the heart I now knew beats only for me.

"You know, the fact that I'm always naked is not helping our situation, is it possible for me to at least wear pants?" I sincerely thought this could help, I understood now all the logic behind me being naked and all the other crap, but out of sight out of mind, right?

"Sorry baby, not yet, but starting tomorrow I'll bring you some clothes so you can go downstairs for dinner. Of course you'll take them off as soon as we come back to our room." He winked mischievously and I rolled my eyes at him, leaning back onto his chest.

"Are those the cookies Emily baked for me?

"Yes babe, damn it, you must be hungry, I'm so stupid." He berated himself.

"I'm not that hungry but Emily's cookies are one of my favorite things in the world and don't call yourself stupid, I don't like it." I stretched my arm to get the container from the side table, but Jake held me in place grabbing it with minimum effort.

I opened the container and immediately the aroma of the chocolate perfumed the whole room.

"You know Seth, that's how you smell like to me, like chocolate, but with a hint of strawberry." I didn't know why I blushed, what the heck! Of course I knew why I blushed; he just gave me a compliment. I almost told him that to me he smelled like moss and wildflowers, which reminded me of my love for the forest, of the walks that I used to take with my father when I was a little boy. He reminded me of the talks we had, while sitting on fallen logs covered in moss, of all the comfort I felt surrounded by the thick vegetation, listening to all the little critters, knowing that as long as my father was with me, I was protected and unconditionally loved. When we would head back home I always picked wildflowers for my mom, it was not a big deal but she always welcomed them, making me feel proud and happy. But, I couldn't tell him that, it would be cruel, it would give him false hope, I bit my tongue, not even I could be that perverse.

"Shit, Seth, that blush looks so sexy on you" his gaze was fixated my face and his voice sounded playful.

"Behave Jacob; be good." I playfully hit him in the shoulder. I had no fucking idea why I was acting like a schoolgirl, pretty soon I was going to start giggling; it was embarrassing. But I felt good; this was the most at ease I ever felt with him.

"Sure, Sure." He exclaimed in the same playful tone, giving me an amazing smile that I didn't remember ever seeing before. His smile was like a sun, warm and full of life.

"You have a beautiful smile, you should smile more Jake." He looked at me grinning from ear to ear, the blushing that stained his cheekbones matched mine perfectly, realizing I expressed aloud what I was thinking.

I started eating the cookies making an effort not to moan or make any noises that might ignite the pilot light in Jacob's loins.

"Aren't you going to offer me any?" he said in mock anger and pouting like a little kid. Shit that pout is so cute, I could just ki... What is wrong with me! I mentally reproached myself.

"Nope, they are mine, only mine." Following his example, I answered like a toddler, he laughed heartily and I looked at him trying to find the reason for his amusement.

"What's so funny?" I asked genuinely curious, Jacob almost never laughs, at least not in my presence.

"I feel about you, like you feel about your cookies. You are mine, only mine." This morning I would've sent him a deadly glare if he said something like that. But now I didn't know how to react.

"You know what? I don't mind sharing, here, take as many as you want." I had no idea what message I was sending him by saying this, but it felt like the right thing to say. I guessed he didn't know what to make of my reaction; he just took two cookies and ate them.

His body tensed and I had to look at him to asses his reaction. I haven't done anything that could cause him to get angry. Then it hit me, the scent I knew so well by now, he was aroused. I crawled off his lap and sat on the bed motioning to take the covers, he stopped me, his dark eyes looking at me.

"Jake, what's going on?" my voice trembled with the nervousness that invaded my body.

"I don't know Seth, I only know I want you, I want to bury myself deep inside you, I want you to scream my name over and over again as I pound into you."

Oh shit, the wolf is out of the bag.

"Jake, try to regain your control, you can do it. Remember what we talked about"

"Seth have no idea how exhausting it is to constantly fight against your wolf" As he said this he moved toward me, taking the cookies away from me and placing the container on the side table, all this without taking his eyes off my face. His eyes fixed on my lips; he bent forward and captured my lips in a heated kiss, licking a few cookie crumbs from around them. His tongue darted out masterfully sneaking in through the corner of my mouth, bullying its way in, he explored every corner of my mouth, tasting it, savoring it.

He threaded his fingers through my hair pulling my head back to expose my neck; he nibbled, kissed and licked up and down my neck, while moaning deeply. He ran his free hand down my side; every movement slow and calculated. There was no rush; he knew that in me, he had a captive audience, key word being captive. He reached my hip, my breath hitched as I felt him gently brush against my limp cock.

"C'mon baby, why you are still soft, I'm working hard here." He whispered into my ear but it sounded more like a whimper.

"Jake, I'm not ready for this, please stop." I said shakily.

"Damn it Seth, damn you!" Pushing me against the bed, he straddled my hips and rubbed his thankfully still clothed erection against me. I turned my head looking out the window at the murky sky and fisted the pillow trying to keep myself from crying and showing any more weakness.

I was so tired of all this, of him trying to overpower me and me resisting. Jacob thought he was exhausted, try being me. Maybe it would be better to let him do whatever he wanted and get it over with, like taking off a band-aid, instead of this slow torture. I stayed very still and prayed that it will be over soon and if it got too bad, that I loose consciousness.

"Seth, baby, at least look at me." I moved my head slowly to meet his gaze, his eyes were glazed over with lust and he locked eyes with me. I felt him still his movements and jump off me, running toward the door and disappearing into the hallway. I let go of the breath I didn't know I was holding. I had no idea what happened, what caused all this? Why did he react this way? I was not resisting why did he leave?

A couple of hours later I heard the door and Jacob's voice talking to his father in the kitchen. I didn't pay attention to their conversation, I really didn't care, my head was pounding and my eyes felt dry.

Jacob came in the room but I didn't turn to look at him, I felt so tired, not just physically but mainly emotionally. He submitted me on a daily basis, to a roller coaster of emotions and it was taking its toll on my already frazzled nerves. I felt the bed dip beside me, Jacob embraced me making me turn around and face him.

"I'm sorry." I knew he was sincere, now that I knew the true nature of his feelings I understood how much it hurts him to see me suffer, especially if he was the cause for that suffering.

"I know." That had become my standard answer lately. We didn't need to say anything else, we were both too tired.

"You must be hungry, I didn't make you any dinner; I'm a terrible mate." He pressed our foreheads together and his voice was barely a whisper.

"Don't worry, I didn't notice I was hungry until you mentioned it." I moved my head back and looked at him, trying to show him that I was also sincere, he didn't have to feel bad for something as superficial as dinner. We both sat up on the bed facing each other.

"I brought you a couple of sandwiches; tomorrow I'll make you a decent dinner."

"Don't sweat it man, I like sandwiches." Jake handed me the plate slightly grazing his hand with mine. I noticed his hand felt rougher than usual. Placing the plate on my lap I reached down and brought one of his hands to where I could see it. I couldn't help the gasp that escaped my throat when I saw the condition of his hand. It was covered in cuts, scrapes and blisters, some of the wounds were already healing but his hands still looked grotesque.

"What did you do to yourself? He tried to pull his hand away but I held on and he stopped resisting.

"It's not important Seth." I held his hand closer to his face, showing him all the damage; I knew he had probably seen it, but I wanted to make a point.

"You mean to tell me, that the condition of your hand it's not important or that the reason behind this is not important. Why are you torturing yourself like this?

"I do it for you Seth." his voice was soft and unassuming but his answer still took me by surprise.

"For me? What do you mean?" I couldn't understand why he was willingly subjecting himself to this punishment. It was not fair, he was hurting himself because of me and this was a completely illogical action. I didn't deserve this level of commitment.

"Whenever I feel angry or horny and feel I'm about to loose control I go to the forest and destroy some trees. It's a bitch on the hands but it helps me think of something else besides well... you."

"Jake, this is insane, you are hurting yourself so you won't hurt me. Do you see what's wrong with this picture? I don't deserve your pain, I don't deserve this." I took his hand and held it up making my point. My voice was strong and confident, without one trace of defiance, just stating the facts.

Then I did something that surprised both of us, instinctively I kissed his hand, like a mom would kiss her child to make the pain go away. Jake's breath hitched and the steady beat of his heart quickened notably, in his face I could see the faint hint of a smile. I guessed he couldn't believe it either; I just reacted to his injuries trying to kiss them away, feeling the strong need to protect him, even from himself.

He lifted his other hand and offered it to me, it was in the same deplorable state, I grabbed it softly, not wanting to aggravate his already sore skin. I held them between my own wishing for all the wounds to heal. In Jacob's eyes I could see a mixture of incredulity, love and utter joy; I felt so close to him at that moment, moving my gaze from his hands to his eyes, feeling insecure and incapable of easing his pain.

Then as sudden as it started it went away, I snapped out of the spell I fell into. Roughly letting go of his hands, I looked around trying my best to avoid his eyes. What the fuck just happened? First I acted like a little girl, now like a mom, what's next? I was going to start knitting sweaters like a grandma? I was lost in thought when I heard something that sounded like a whimper and realized it came from Jake.

"Please Seth, don't fight it anymore." his voice was barely a whisper; the emotion in his words was painful to hear, especially because I knew that any answer I gave him was going to hurt his feelings, I decided the best course of action for both of us, was to remain silent.

I grabbed one of the sandwiches and held it, just looking at it like I didn't know what to do with it. I was afraid of eating in front of him and eliciting another reaction like the one he had just a few hours ago.

"Jake, can I ask you something?"

"Sure." 

"Are you going to get all horny ape on me if I eat this sandwich in front of you?" I was genuinely concerned, first the pancakes and today the cookies. I just didn't know anymore.

"Don't worry Seth, I won't, but if it will help you feel better I'll go downstairs and come back for the plate in a while, sounds good?"

I nodded and he exited the room quickly. I sat on the bed eating my dinner and wondering what tomorrow will bring.

**I'm very excited about the next chapter and decided to give you a little taste of what's to come. But they are not sealing the deal in this chapter, not yet ...**

**Chapter 23 Seduction is much better than intimidation.**

**"Glad to see you're awake" I opened my eyes and propped myself on my elbows, just to find him looking at me through half lidded eyes, never loosing eye contact while he swirled the tip of my hard cock with his tongue. He broke eye contact to continue with his ministrations, sucking, licking and kissing my cock. I threw myself back on the bed frustrated with myself, I had to make him stop, I didn't want this, I didn't want him sucking me like... ahh shit this fucker really knows how to give head, sooo good. The pressure inside me was reaching dangerous levels, if I was going to make him stop it had to be now before it was too late.**


	23. Chapter 23 Seduction

**I want to thank all the readers for joining me in this adventure and sharing the ups and downs of our wolves. A big hug to all of you who review, every message brings me a lot of happiness and helps me grow as a writer. **

**I know most of you are ready for the story to end, but as I mentioned in the previous chapter our boys might be mythical creatures but their love is very human and it takes time to nurture and develop. **

**All the characters belong to Stephenie Meyer.**

Chapter 23 Seduction is much better than intimidation.

Seth POV

We fell into a comfortable routine and were working on having something that at least resembled a friendship. I felt Jake trusted me more and in response I also trusted him more. We had dinner with his father almost every night. Billy still hated me with a passion, but at least he tried to be civil. Sometimes it would get very uncomfortable when they started arguing because of me, Jake demanded respect from Billy towards me and there was no way Billy was going to ever have any consideration with me. I tried to always remain respectful and in more than one occasion I asked Jake not to argue with his father because of me. Losing my father helped me appreciate the blessing of having your dad still around and I knew that apart from me, they had a good relationship.

Every now and then Jake would surprise me and we would go for short walks, which were limited to the areas around his house but at least it was something. After being cooped up in that room for weeks it felt fantastic to breathe fresh air and stretch my legs so to speak. We would walk holding hands and talked the whole time; we never ran out of conversation topics.

We had been making strides into becoming friends; Jake took the first step by bringing some tools and taking all the nails off the window in our room and the one in the bathroom. It felt so much better in the bedroom, being able to open the window and enjoy the fresh air was a great improvement. At first Jake would order me probably ten times a day not to leave the room, which got very old fast. I asked him to trust me and promised I was not going to jump off either window and after some debate he trusted me in that matter.

Phasing was another issue that reached ridiculous levels; there were so many conditions and preparations it was not even worth it. Jake had to make sure there would be nobody from the pack close to his house; he didn't want to risk anybody seeing me naked. We would go to the forest behind his house and he always had to phase first, his reasoning behind this was that if I phased first I could take off running and he could loose precious seconds while phasing. He also insisted that phasing first allowed him to canvass the forest for any threats, because his enhanced hearing and sense of smell were more sensitive in wolf form. After I would phase he walked around me like a fucking satellite, I had to keep pushing him and asking him to at least let me take more than two steps. We always ended up arguing, with him cutting the time short and almost dragging me back to the room.

Regardless of how I felt about him, it was painful to feel the amount of fear he had over losing me. I couldn't understand why he was so scared, I was an awful mate that rejected him on a daily basis but that didn't seem to matter to him. He had told me that he needed me like the air to breathe, that was a concept that was completely foreign to me, I never felt that way about anybody and by the looks of It, I never will.

I really wanted to visit my family and see Emily, but Jake would not budge. I couldn't see what the big deal was; it was not like he didn't drag me from my house weeks ago, what was the worse that could happen? That I would insist on staying and he would need to drag me back here again, unless a sense of _deja vu_ was a crime I didn't understand why he was so reluctant.

After dinner Jake walked back to the bedroom with me, he wanted to take my clothes before leaving to run his patrol; I didn't know why he insisted on this shit. I thought it was evident that I was beginning to accept our situation, why he needed to keep humiliating me was baffling. After handing Jacob my clothes I turned to climb on the bed and watch some television before going to sleep. Jake pulled me towards him pressing my body against his; our bodies had a way of shaping against each other like two pieces of a puzzle. He captured my lips in a passionate kiss, he didn't really know any other type of kiss, he exuded sex trough every pore. He would grab my arms placing them around his neck, I still couldn't bring myself to hug him or kiss him willingly, but at least I didn't remove them. Jacob left for his patrol leaving me alone in the bedroom. Even though I would never admit it to anyone, every time he left I felt such a terrible emptiness. I worried about something happening to him; I decided to go to sleep as a way to escape my reality and all the worries in my heart.

I opened my eyes welcoming another day into my life, still groggy; I tried to focus on a big shadow next to me. It was no other than Jacob, sitting on the bed, watching me intently. What bothered me tremendously was the amused look on his face, add the most annoying smirk anybody could possess and that was the perfect recipe to piss me off early in the morning.

"What are you doing here? Don't tell me you were watching me sleep? That's just plain creepy." Some people might find it adorable, but not me; to me it seemed like stalker behavior. What if I started to drool? What would happen if I fart? I was sure nobody would find that romantic.

"You were moaning and saying my name. You were dreaming about me." Jacob had a sparkle in his eyes and a faint smile. His expression was hopeful and happy.

"How do you know it was not a nightmare?" I spat at him unwilling to give him even the slightest amount of hope. His expression changed immediately, I could see his broad chest heaving, his fists tight by his sides and eyes closed. I knew he was trying to control his anger.

With a sudden burst of speed Jacob's face was just inches away from mine, he was straddling my hips. Jake's scent attacked me, wrapping me in a blanket of need and desire. His mouth descended towards mine, demanding, possessive, just like him. His tongue demanded access into my mouth that I granted willingly. Our tongues began their fight for dominance, it was like a game, a give and take, where the territory was my mouth and the trophy was eliciting a moan from my lips. I have to admit, however reluctantly, that Jacob was very skilled with his mouth. That thought sent a shiver that began in my mouth and traveled all the way to my groin. I responded to his kisses as they became wilder and untamed.

Jacob grinded his exposed erection against mine, making me moan in wanton. I felt so angry at myself for being weak, but what the hell! I was a horny teenager, if Jake willingly gave me pleasure I would accept it. He left my lips following a trail of kisses along my jaw and down my throat, it felt amazing, even a cynical bastard like me had to accept all the feelings just his kisses stirred inside me.

My breath escaped me hard when he ran his tongue ever so gently over my nipple, while rolling the other between his fingers. He continued his journey down my chest, kissing and licking my abdomen and leaving a trail of saliva. He finally arrived at his destination and leaned back to give me a lust filled look.

I watched him as he licked his lips, his pink tongue bringing moisture to those able full lips, the kind of lips made for kissing. He descended over my erect cock inhaling the scent of my arousal. Brushing his moist lips over the tip he moaned loudly. The sensation of his light touches over my painfully hard member ignited a desire on me that I didn't know I was capable of feeling.

"Please Jake stop teasing." I tried to sound demanding but it came out like a half choke and half whine.

"I'm not teasing baby, this is just too good to hurry."

This was torture; I wanted the warmth of his mouth to surround me, to engulf me completely. Jacob noticing my desperation chuckled to himself before slowly licking the length of my shaft from top to bottom. I began to buckle my hips forward to increase the contact with his mouth and at the same time hoping he would realize how much I needed him.

He trailed his way up to the head licking the tip that was already leaking pre-cum, moaning loudly; he feasted on the pearls that were spilling from my slit. He sounded like he was enjoying the most delicious and exotic dish ever created.

"Mmm you taste sooo good baby."

Suddenly I was surrounded by moist warmth, sending ripples of pleasure through my whole body. He sunk his mouth down taking all my length into his skillful mouth. He held me in his mouth while sucking in his cheeks, he kept moaning and the vibrations of his moans added to the pleasurable feelings I was experiencing. The combination of feelings almost sending me over the edge, but I fought against it, I didn't want it to end, not yet, it felt too good.

He moved up and down slowly, sensually sucking a little bit harder each time. I felt like I was going to explode at any moment.

"Just like that, suck me dry baby, I'm so close." I heard him chuckle and as the cold air touched my wet erect member I whined at the loss of the sensation.

"Not yet puppy, I don't want it to end just yet" he became silent and I felt his mouth on one of my balls; he took it in his mouth hungrily sucking on my smooth sack. He left one just to take the other sucking it gently, using his lips to nibble the sensitive skin.

Didn't he know I was suffering? I needed my release, I needed him.

"Jakey, please, I need you" I grabbed his head threading my fingers on his silky hair, trying to guide his head back to my aching and desperate for attention member. I was whimpering, begging, at that moment I had no dignity, no pride. The burning pain of desire consumed all my senses and the beautiful brute whose weight I felt on me was all I needed. There was no family, no pack, nothing, just Jacob.

I arched my back when his mouth surrounded me again, engulfing me in a lust filled haze. He tasted me, savoring my desire and his moans of pleasure were telling me that he was enjoying this as much as I was. He continued deep throating me, sucking, licking, swallowing around my member, sending wave after wave of pleasure throughout my entire body.

Shamelessly I spread my legs wider and pushed his head down in a futile attempt to make him take me deeper into his mouth, it was impossible; I was already touching the back of his throat with my tip. I purred in pure delight as his mouth increased its speed and pressure on my cock.

Everything felt so real, this had to be the best dream I ever had. I could feel the warm and moist cave that was Jacob's mouth. The scent of our combined arousals was overwhelming, it was wild and animalistic. Wait a minute, this felt real, too real. I didn't know if I was awake or was still dreaming. It was impossible, I had to be dreaming, there was no way Jacob was giving me so much pleasure.

Jacob's voice took me out of my internal monologue.

"Glad to see you're awake." I opened my eyes and propped myself on my elbows, just to find him looking at me through half lidded eyes, never loosing eye contact while he swirled the tip of my hard cock with his tongue. He broke eye contact to continue with his ministrations, sucking, licking and kissing my cock. I threw myself back on the bed frustrated with myself, I had to make him stop, I didn't want this, I didn't want him sucking me like... ahh shit this fucker really knows how to give head, sooo good. The pressure inside me was reaching dangerous levels, if I was going to make him stop it had to be now before it was too late.

"Jacob" I opened my mouth to protest, but as I did he swallowed my whole cock until it touched the back of his throat. He held my length in his mouth, swallowing and moaning around it, Jacob ran his hands over my sides slightly scratching me with his nails. He was attacking me with different sensations, all of them extremely pleasurable. To hell with it! I didn't want him to stop, who was I kidding? I wanted him to make me cum.

"Jake don't stop I'm close."

"I know baby, close your eyes and enjoy it." He sunk his head all the way down and kept bobbing his head up and down, bringing me closer to my release each time. Jake would suck just the tip, running his tongue over the slit; he guessed how much I would love that and he was right, it was a very sensitive spot for me. He grabbed my behind and pulled it gently off the bed effectively making me bury my cock in his mouth until his nose was buried in my crotch and his chin was touching my balls. Our moans were loud and obscene, his were muffled by the intruder in his mouth, but mine were embarrassingly loud and I didn't care.

Threading my fingers on his soft hair I moved his head up and down as much as he would allow me. In my ecstasy I pulled his head up all the way, I heard a light pop when my cock sprung out of his mouth. I whimpered at the loss of contact and didn't welcome the cold air on my burning skin. Jacob looked at me with a mischievous expression, his lips were red and swollen and his eyes were glazed over with lust.

"You don't want me to continue Sethy?" Jake asked while malevolently smirking.

"Please Jake don't stop, I need you baby."

"Your wish is my command love" with these words he sank his mouth all the way down and continued bopping his head up and down while gently sucking, swallowing, moaning…. so many sensations. It was impossible to describe or explain, I was lost on all the pleasure my mate was giving me.

I felt that coil deep inside me snap.

"Jake, I'm cum..." he didn't let go, he held on to my cock swallowing with gluttony all my fluid. He moaned into it and held me in his mouth while I was riding my orgasm. Fuck yeah! This had to be the biggest most intense orgasm of my entire life.

I whimpered at the loss of his warmth when he let go of my limp member. Noticing my reaction he laid down next to me, running his warm hand along my side, cupping my balls and still dripping cock. He took the few drops that where spilling over the head wiping them with his finger, only to bring his finger to his mouth and lick it.

I had never seen a more sexual act before, watching Jake, next to me, licking my cum off his finger was something that I never thought I would witness and here I was, getting hard again from this act alone.

The feeling of something wet under me snapped me from the Jake induced trance I was in. I moved slightly and saw a small puddle of a white substance that I recognized immediately, Jacob noticed and a blush stained his cheeks.

"I'm sorry Seth, it was so hot and arousing to feel you cum, that I couldn't help myself and I came all over the sheets. Don't worry, I'll get clean ones.

"Jake, what did just happen?" I needed and explanation, I felt very confused with the whole dream.

"I was in my room and heard you moaning and saying my name, I came to check on you, just to find the most fascinating sight I've ever see. You were asleep, stroking your cock that was already hard as a rock, bucking your hips and moaning. I couldn't help myself and crawled over you, replacing your hand with my mouth. Baby you taste so good, you have no idea it's just an animalistic flavor, something unique and special, like you" he was looking at me while lovingly caressing my face with his callous hand, but I couldn't help the embarrassment that invaded my whole body, it was unreal.

This had to be one of the most awkward moments of my entire life. First, I was having a wet dream with Jacob as the main character. Second, Jacob knew I was dreaming about him. Third, Jacob responded to my dream by doing exactly what I was dreaming about. I could see the pride and the emotion in his eyes, but that only made me feel worse, I had no intention of ever having a romantic relationship with him. Imprint or not he could not expect me to ever reciprocate the feelings he claimed to have for me.

"Baby, you have nothing to be embarrassed about, believe me when I tell you that to hear your moans and see the look of ecstasy in your face is pure bliss." He was sincere and that made it even worse.

I couldn't speak any more, I felt very vulnerable at this moment, Jacob watched each one of my reactions but I wouldn't dare look at him, instead I averted my gaze, looking out the window. I saw some shy rays of sunshine that dared to escape through the clouds making their way into the room in thin lines filled with innumerable particles of dust. I knew that soon even those rays of sunshine will disappear; the dark clouds will take possession of the sky claiming it as their own. I couldn't help compare Jacob to the dark clouds and me to the sky; he dominated me in every way, bullying his way into my life. I felt like the sky, full of possibilities but being limited by the invaders that made the best part of it disappear, only leaving a sad grey vision of dread.

Jacob POV

I was mesmerized watching Seth, wishing I could do something to help him feel better, even though I loved the blushing that adorned his beautiful face, knowing that he felt embarrassed made my heart ache. Why did he have to feel embarrassed for having feelings for me? I was not crazy, I knew he was developing feelings for me; he was just too stubborn to accept it. He was less defiant, I didn't see as much hate in his eyes. Now his eyes mainly looked sad, I would give anything to see joy in those beautiful grey eyes.

Leaving the bedroom I hoped to one day share with him, I went for a walk, wandering aimlessly until I ended up at the beach. As usual my thoughts were all about Seth, I was lost and not knowing what to do was driving me mad. Every time I looked into his eyes all I saw was fear, sadness and heartache, and the worst part was that I was the cause for all these emotions. Maybe I was deceiving myself by thinking that he had feelings for me, but just the thought of Seth never loving me filled me with such anguish that I didn't think I could survive if he ever left me.

Sitting on a piece of driftwood I inhaled the briny smell rising from the ocean I loved. It was amazing how certain smells can transport you to a different time and remind you of people or situations long forgotten. Closing my eyes I could see my mother warning me not to swim too far or telling my sisters to stop splashing me when they would gang up on me. Damn I missed them so much, they all abandoned me. My mother had no choice; fate took her away from me, proving once again that death only takes the best. But my sisters had no excuse, one day they just took off without looking back, nor caring about their father or the younger brother they left behind. I had been bitter about their abandonment, but I couldn't be angry with them, if I had the chance I would've taken off a long time ago. I wouldn't be a wolf and I would have not dragged Seth into the hell that was my life.

The only part of my life that provided me with a small amount of happiness was Seth. Unfortunately my joy was directly proportional to his sadness.

The ocean was endless, making me feel so small compared to the vastness of the sea. I felt alone, like I was the only person left in the world and was destined to a life of regret and loneliness. But I didn't want to live a life of regret, I needed to earn Seth's trust and love, I was desperate for it. If Seth left me that would be the last straw, I wouldn't be able to go on living. I was terrified of losing him and that lead to the behavior that was doing just that, pushing him away from me.

I watched as the waves crashed endlessly against the rocks along the shore, feeling as I was standing on those rocks and the waves kept hitting me trying to make me fall into the dark abyss of the ocean. Was Seth my rock or the waves? Could he save me or was he going to be the cause of my demise?

I needed a new strategy, all my plans failed miserably and I was getting desperate. We were making some progress into becoming friends, but it was not enough, I needed more. Seth was no closer to submitting to me than he was three weeks ago when I brought him here. Quite the opposite, he just seemed to have given up, resigned to having to live with me. But that was not what I wanted; I needed him to love me, to demand my company and to crave my body like I craved his.

With Sam's help I had been learning to control my wolf, I was very grateful to him, he helped me so much. Since the first time I phased he was there to guide me and now he was teaching me everything he had learned along the years about controlling your wolf. Especially after the unfortunate incident in his house the night of Seth's birthday, the fact that he would even consider the idea of helping me was disconcerting. He probably did it as a way to ensure his brother's safety, but knowing Sam like I did, he was doing it from the goodness of his heart.

The incident this morning shone some light about two things; at a subconscious level, Seth wanted me, which would explain the dreams. Today was not the first time I heard him moaning my name in his sleep, today I couldn't help myself and had to confirm what I was hearing, I had to see him and it paid off. I could feel his shock and hesitance but his body won and he allowed me to give him pleasure. That brought me to my second point; Seth didn't reject me when I was pleasuring him. Maybe that should be my approach, sex.

Could I be strong enough to seduce him without attacking him? Could I show him that I love him more that I want him? I hoped to earn his trust with the part of me he fears the most, my sexuality. I needed to show him everything I had to offer, which even if I said so myself, was a lot. I had to put my plan into action, this had to work.

"Damn it Jake, can you think about something else?" it was Jared's voice whining in my head as we ran patrol.

"You are starting to make me horny and considering all your thoughts are about Seth, this feels so wrong it's not even funny." Jared's voice kept blasting in my head, but he was right, since I started the patrol I haven't been able to think about anything else but ways to seduce Seth. I had a few pretty good ideas, but needed to fine tune it so it didn't come back to bite me in the ass.

"Jared, I'm sorry about the movie playing in my head, by the way don't ever think of MY Seth that way, if you want your nuts to stay attached to your body." I just caught up on Jared's comment a little while ago, I needed to control my thoughts better, I couldn't allow the pack to see intimate images of my Seth.

"Why don't you go home, patrol is almost over and everything is calm." I had to cut him some slack since I exposed him to all my perverse thoughts for the last couple of hours. Also I needed some time alone, to think about what I was going to do today.

"Thanks Jake, see you tomorrow." Through our pack bond I saw him run towards Kim's house and just like that, I couldn't see anything anymore, he shifted back to human form. Poor Kim she was probably going to pay for all the dirty thoughts I projected into Jared's head.

After doing one more run around the reservation I went home, the night air felt crisp and cool against the furnace that was my skin. I shifted back to human form not bothering to get dressed, it was early but Billy was probably in bed already or watching a game in the living room, either way he wouldn't care to see me walking around the house naked, it wouldn't be the first time.

I went directly to the bathroom to take a shower, when I walked by our bedroom I could hear the television; Seth was probably watching the game. Excited with the plan I had for tonight I scrubbed my body hastily, in my mind going over everything I was going to do. I felt my face get warmer than usual and realized I was fucking blushing. I shut off the water and dried myself, after tying the towel around my waist I walked to our bedroom.

Opening the door slowly, I immediately felt Seth's eyes on me, when he saw me getting closer to the bed I could hear his heart starting to race, he moved towards the headboard until his back was touching the cold steel bars. I looked at his beautiful face and felt a dagger go through my heart, when I saw the fear in his eyes. His breath hitched and his heart was beating so loud, I could feel it on my chest.

"Don't be scared puppy, I'm not going to hurt you, I promise." I hoped I didn't prove myself a liar with this promise, I prayed I could control myself enough that I could get through with everything, without making any attempts against Seth's virginity. I saw him slightly relax, his eyes were still cautious and his heart was still racing. I felt so guilty for evoking that response in him, I didn't want him to fear me. I wanted his love and respect.

"Wha...what are you doing Jake?" his timid voice came out like a whisper, fear making it tremble.

I didn't answer; climbing on the bed I positioned myself at the foot of the bed, as far away from him as I could, this way he could relax a little and enjoy the show. Reaching for the remote I turned off the television. Seth stayed in the same spot he dragged himself to, when I entered the room. His eyes fixated on me, pupils dilated, lips dry from his rapid breathing, hands by his sides and legs crossed in an attempt to hide his body from me.

I took off my towel to reveal my naked body to him, I heard him gasp when he saw my cock which was already getting hard just by being in the same room as Seth. I kneeled and placed the towel in front of me, I positioned my right hand at the base of my semi-erect cock, slowly going up and down along the shaft, I placed my left hand on my hip, I wanted to look sexy, to make him lust after me, it was embarrassing to me, but I was desperate and if this worked it could lead to even better things.

"Watch me baby." my voice deep and husky.

Closing my eyes I pictured Seth moaning while I sucked him this morning, I felt my cock get filled with blood and become more sensitive to my touch. It felt so good, I was masturbating for him and hopefully he was enjoying the show. I moved my left hand from my hip slowly, towards my chest, stopping to gently rub my nipple.

Keeping my left hand on my chest I continued stroking slowly but at an even pace. I bit my lower lip to capture a moan that was threatening to leave my lips; I felt my thighs quiver under the intense delight I was experiencing.

Then it hit me, I felt the most mouth watering aroma, the scent of Seth's arousal, it was sweet and animalistic at the same time. I dared to open my eyes to find Seth with his eyes glued to my hands. He looked flushed, his nostrils flared and his hand seemed to debating whether or not to grab his own erection and mirror my actions.

Booyaa he liked it! His whole body was reacting; this is exactly what I wanted.

Seth locked eyes with me and at that moment I knew he was lost into me. His grey eyes were hazy with lust, his plump pink lips slightly parted to allow his breath to escape in harsh pants. His chest was heaving and his heart was beating erratically

I started bucking into my hand, growling, moaning and saying Seth's name, the deep russet mushroom was glistening with the pre-cum, that I was rubbing on it. My left hand was resting now on my ripped stomach, going over the edge of my eight-pack.

Locking eyes with Seth again I brought my right hand to my mouth and licked each finger. I saw him lick his lips, his soft pink tongue peeking between his lips to provide much needed moisture. I brought my hand down to my erection and continued pumping, sliding easier now.

The whole room was heavy with sex, our scents mixing together, the way they should be. I felt the familiar tightening in my lower abdomen, that wonderful coil winding itself to snap at the moment of my release. I was very close, I didn't want it to end, all the initial embarrassment gone, now it was only pleasure, the combined pleasure of my own ministrations and the vision of delight that was Seth, bringing me to the edge of ecstasy.

I cried out breathlessly repeating Seth's name over and over again, I felt my whole body convulsing in waves of pleasure while spewing white ribbons all over the towel in front of me. My whole body was shaking and I had to sit back on my legs to ride the end tail of my orgasm. I opened my eyes to find Seth watching me with wide eyes, while attempting to hide from me his erection.

I crawled towards him and saw him stiffen and shake lightly. Sitting beside him I caught a glimpse of my beautiful imprint in full bloom. His cock was hard and leaking pre- cum, his plump lips were parted to allow his panting breaths to come out. His skin felt warmer than usual and a beautiful blushing adorned his face.

Placing my right hand on his cheek I placed a chaste kiss on his lips, I didn't want to scare him, my goal was to give him pleasure.

"Baby, you seem to have a little problem, do you want me to lend you a helping hand?" I tilted my head to the left trying to soften my appearance, all I could think was, please say yes, please say yes...

"Yes Jake." his voice was very low, but sounded deep and filled with sensuality I never heard before. He wouldn't look at me but he leaned back against the headboard and closed his eyes.

With my left hand I grabbed his throbbing member and began to pump him slowly, his breath was coming out in short pants, he was so close, it was a shame because I was really enjoying this. I kissed him deeply pushing my tongue through his already parted lips, he moaned into my mouth seductively. His eyes were closed and he brought one hand up and interlaced it in my hair, pulling me towards him to deepen the kiss. I was in heaven, this is the way it should be, my imprint wanting me, demanding my caresses.

He pulled away from the kiss and I whimpered at the loss of the softness of his lips, I watched him, he was moaning, his breath escaping him fast.

"Jake... " I saw the white strings shoot out from him to land all over my hand and his abdomen. He sat in the afterglow of his release, his body shimmering with a thin layer of sweat. I sat closer to him, snaked my arm around his waist, and placed my head on his shoulder delighted on the scent of his arousal that still permeated the room.

I saw his cum on my hand and couldn't resist the temptation of tasting it; I was addicted to everything that was Seth. I was licking his cum of my hand when I heard a soft whimper, lifting my gaze I caught Seth looking at me. I couldn't help but smile realizing the effect this simple act was causing in him.

"Baby, you want to taste it? You want to taste yourself?" He looked like he couldn't understand a word I was saying, so I made up his mind for him. Lapping the remainder cum from my hand I pulled him toward me, kissing him deeply and making him taste himself in my mouth. He moaned deeply and responded to my kiss by fiercely pushing my tongue around in a sensual dance inside his mouth. We broke the kiss when the need for air became a priority.

"How did you like it? Isn't it delicious?" Seth blushed intensely and I couldn't help but smile at his innocent reaction.

"You are not going to talk to me? Are you angry at me Seth?

"No Jake I'm not angry, just embarrassed." He moved his upper body slightly so he was facing me, but kept his gaze down. Leaning against my chest he placed his sweaty forehead against my chest.

"What are you doing to me Jake? How can you disarm me? You are taking down all my defenses and leaving me naked, not only physically but emotionally."

"Baby, I just love you and give you everything that I am. I need to your trust and your love." At my declaration he didn't answer, but my heart skipped a beat when I felt his soft lips kissing my chest. He placed butterfly kisses over my chest slowly going up my throat. I stayed very still not wanting to do anything that might make him stop. His kisses were sweet and innocent, like him.

Seth reached my face but couldn't bring himself to kiss me on the lips; I felt his hesitation but wouldn't dare push him in any way. At this moment he was in charge and I was willing to accept any crumbs he would throw my way.

"Jake I don't even know how to act around you anymore, I'm so conflicted."

"Sethy, just listen to your heart, my love. Every time you relax and allow your feelings to guide you, I see the real Seth, you are so amazing, so loving, a truly wonderful mate." I gently stroked his gorgeous face, cupping his cheek and he leaned against my touch.

"It's just so embarrassing, my body betrays me and I end up making a fool of myself." He chuckled lightly burying his head on my neck.

"You are never a fool Seth; anyway, baby don't you think I'm the one who should be embarrassed? I'm the one who came here and masturbated in front of you."

"Yes about that, have you no shame man?" He erupted into laughter, making me laugh with him. I felt so happy, sated and accepted. I knew this was only the first step, but it was a good one, we had a long way ahead of us but this was a great beginning.

**I hope you enjoyed this chapter, Jake is not done with his plan of seduction but the chapter was already too long and I needed to divide it. Anyway there are only a few chapters left and our boys are getting closer every day. **


	24. Chapter 24 Seduction, trust and jealousy

**Hello everybody, it's me again with another chappie. This one is a little different, naughty and fluffy, for those of you who celebrate Thanksgiving something light to help you deal with all your crazy relatives. For those of you who don't celebrate this holiday something sweet to get you through the week.**

**Here you'll read the progression of their relationship, but don't be fooled, there are still a few more hurdles to get over before the story ends.**

**Disclaimer: I don't own Twilight or any of its characters, if I did I would be a millionaire and you would've seen me as part of the wedding scene in Breaking Dawn.**

Chapter 24 Seduction, trust and jealousy

**Jacob POV**

As the days passed Seth felt more at ease with me, we would watch television together in our room and he would lean against my chest, making me forget what I was watching and concentrate on Seth, on his addictive scent, in the way his hair sticks up all over his head in an untamable mess. I observed the curves and lines of his face, the beautiful shape of his lips, so pink, plump and kissable. His body was lightly toned; his beautiful cooper skin taut over his lightly defined muscles. His supple thighs that contained in them the secret weapon to give my Seth immense amounts of pleasure, his sweet spot.

I felt bad leaving him alone for long periods of time, I knew he got bored, but I was trying to earn some extra cash by working a few hours in a garage in Forks and I was fulfilling my duties as pack leader and chief of our reservation. I was wearing many hats right now, but the best moment of the day was when I came back to him. He was allowed to call his family anytime he wanted; I knew how much he missed them. I wish I had the strength to let him go visit them, but I couldn't shake this feeling that I was going to lose him.

Today had been a good day; I got my paycheck and was able to go grocery shopping and got Seth his favorite goodies, including chocolate chip cookies and ice cream. I had never been so happy to have a cart full of groceries as today; I needed to get lube and even though I knew it was stupid I felt terribly embarrassed about buying it. Thank goodness I bumped into that article that explained the importance of using a good lubricant. I could not believe I was planning to claim Seth without it, which would have been cruel. I've never had sex with a guy and had no idea, shit I've never had sex, period. Seth probably thought I was very experienced but truth be told I was as lost as he was. He will be my first and my only, and I'll be his first and only as well.

When I got home I immediately checked on Seth, as a good submissive he was in our room, lately I didn't even order him to stay. It worried me that he may have noticed, but if I wanted him to trust me I needed to trust him too. Anyway, I was so in sync with his scent and with the strength of our bond, if he ever escaped I was sure I would have no trouble finding him and at that exact moment Seth Clearwater will be claimed.

Dad left me a note on the kitchen table saying he was having dinner at Charlie's and was probably going to stay and watch the game. We had the house to ourselves all afternoon. That set into motion the gears in my head, trying to choose how to put to good use that privacy.

As I was putting away the groceries I heard Seth go in the bathroom and start the shower. I felt the blood rush to my face when one of the ideas I had been playing with, popped into my head. Running upstairs I went directly to the bathroom, opening the door slowly I peeked in to see if Seth was already in the shower. Seth noticed me and immediately his heart picked up, I wished it would be from anticipation or excitement for having me there, but I couldn't fool myself; I knew he was scared.

"Jacob, what are you doing here, have you ever heard of privacy?" Seth's tone was snappy, I was pissed at his comment, he should know by now that there was no such thing as privacy between a dominant and his submissive. But I made a conscious effort to keep my cool. I didn't answer; I needed all my strength to do what I was planning to do without losing control, after all most of my fantasies involved water in some way or the other, so this was especially difficult. After taking off my clothes I stepped in the shower with Seth.

"Jake ... man ... if you are in a hurry I'll get out and you can shower." Seth's voice was now shaky, he was very aware of the fact that I always fantasized about taking him in the shower.

"No Seth, I want to shower with you, actually I want to scrub that scrumptious body of yours." I couldn't help but look up and down his body lustily, he just looked so sexy, so inviting, with all the small droplets of water covering his body, enveloping him. He probably noticed, and started shaking lightly, his eyes glued to the floor. I was even more determined not to lose control; if he was ever going to trust me I had to be strong for both of us.

"Don't be scared, I'm in control, look into my eyes Seth." I placed my finger under his chin and made him look up, directly into my eyes. He needed to see for himself that it was me, Jacob, not the wolf. I felt him let out a breath he was probably holding since the moment I came inside the bathroom.

"I need you to trust me, can you trust me Sethy?" my voice was low and reassuring, the whole scenario was turning me on and I fought to keep my wolf in check. Running a finger from his temple to his perfect lips, I couldn't help but peck him lightly on the lips.

"I can try Jake." He sounded hesitant and unsure but it was a small victory. That's all I asked, all I needed was for my imprint to give me a chance.

Grabbing the shampoo, I squirted some on my hands and began massaging Seth's scalp with firm and determined strokes. I loved how it felt to run my fingers through his inky locks; I was going slow, being tender and showing him how much I cared. With this non-sexual act I wanted him to see that he was much more to me than sex, that our relationship could be sensual and tender at the same time. I pushed him gently towards the water and slowly rinsed the shampoo off his hair. I couldn't help but watch all the tiny bubbles run down his body hugging every small curve and indentation, before ending up on the shower floor.

Seth had his eyes closed; he looked so angelic, relaxed and happy. My wolf was ordering me to bend him over and take him, just like I had fantasized so many times, but I couldn't, he trusted me and I was not going to betray him. I painfully willed my wolf into submission; I was the one giving the orders, not him. I would first run out of this bathroom, than do anything that would damage the bond I was forming with my imprint.

I took the soap working a good lather on my hands; Seth was watching me and took one step out of the running water. I began by washing his face; he rinsed it quickly so the soap wouldn't go into his eyes. Using both hands and starting behind his ears I massaged his skin gently, running my hands down his neck covering it with soap. Unfortunately I shivered when the memory of the night of his birthday hit me, the way I held him, almost choking him to death, I would never forgive myself for my actions that night, hopefully we'll have a lifetime together to make it up to him. I shook that image out of my head and concentrated on the task at hand. I took the soap and continued massaging his shoulders and his arms; I reached his hands and interlaced our fingers for an instant before letting go.

"Baby, raise your arms." Seth complied quickly and I washed under his arms tickling him, he giggled and it was music to my ears. He looked at me with a happy look in his usually scared eyes. Taking his wrists, I brought his arms down to their original position on each side of his body. He looked so young and innocent; it melted my heart to see him happy.

Moving to his torso and abdomen I reveled on the pure delight that was feeling his muscles under my hands. Even more alluring was the look of pure bliss on his beautiful face, he looked at ease, with a faint smile adding itself to the whole look. Seth let out a moan and clasped his hand over his mouth, looking at me with wide eyes, at the same time an intense blush crept from his chest to his face.

"I'm glad you are enjoying your bath, feel free to make any noises you feel like, don't limit yourself." I winked at him trying to put him at ease, he looked mortified and I had to bite the inside of my cheek to prevent me from laughing.

"Turn around." I couldn't help the tone of my voice, it was low and sensual. But he did without questioning me, his breathing was even and his heartbeat was normal, he was not scared! He trusted me.

I scrubbed his back, starting with his neck, shoulders and going down toward his behind, digging with my fingers into his muscles in a rhythmic pattern. Flowing down to the small of his back I massaged with small circular motions the whole area. He was moaning and had to lean against the cold tile wall using his arm as a pillow. I continued going up and down his back with my big callous hands, it felt so incredible to be touching him like this, without orders or threats.

Kneeling beside him I washed his thighs and legs, working my hands in an inward and outward motion all the way down to his feet. I felt his breath hitch followed by a loud moan when I rubbed his sweet spot. The scent of his arousal hits me, peeking around I saw he was hard as a rock, his cock standing proud among all the soap that covered his body.

Standing up next to him I lathered my hands even more and set the soap aside. Slowly but steady I massaged Seth's groin, he opened his eyes and stood up straight, I could even see his shoulders hiking up in a clear sign that he was no longer relaxed.

"Seth, listen to me, please trust me, I am not going to do anything against your will, I promise." He glanced at my straining erection and looked into my eyes, I knew he was looking for signs of the wolf in them, but he was not going to find it. I was calling the shots and he was not going to hurt my imprint ever again. Smiling at him I pressed our foreheads together, and felt him breathe deeply. When I pulled back I could see his brows were furrowed and he was deep in thought, probably debating if he should trust me or not.

"Ok Jake, I'm going to trust you" his voice was barely audible and was shaking lightly but he turned towards me and gave me the sweetest smile I had ever seen. I knew right then and there that I couldn't betray his trust in any way or form.

Lathering my hands even more I continued scrubbing his groin, going in small circles towards his cock and balls. His skin was so soft, not a speck of hair on him, my hands found his cock and gently massaged the whole length of it. The moan that escaped his lips betrayed him. Making a risky decision I began massaging his ass, rubbing circles on each globe and allowing my hand to slide down his crack. At this he turned his head sharply and looked at me.

"Trust me" I needed to reassure him, let him know that he was safe.

After a minute he closed his eyes and allowed me to continue scrubbing him in his most intimate area. Finding his puckered hole I ran my finger over it and gently circled around it, teasing it watching out for any reaction in Seth. At the same time I continued massaging up and down his cock. After a few minutes he started bucking into my hand and his breathing was increasing coming out in pants. I pushed the tip of my index finger inside him and felt him gasp, but he was already too far gone, he was lost in the pleasure.

"Oh Jake... my Jake..." he came hard moaning and repeating my name, I held him up when I felt his knees give under him, he was limp and struggled to get his breathing under control. I held him against my body but he was still covered in soap and very slippery, trying to prevent an accident I moved with him so we were both standing under the water and helped him rinse.

I was in heaven; he called me _my Jake, _yes baby I'm yours, all yours, forever. I wanted to hold him forever never letting him go. I wanted him to know that I was all his, the same way he was all mine.

Seth could barely stand up; I shut off the water and helped him out of the shower. Taking the towel I dried his hair and his body, he had the most adorable dreamy look on his face.

I couldn't help myself and peppered his beautiful face with kisses; he surprised me by seeking my lips and giving me a chaste kiss on them. I was the one blushing now; I felt his sweet, shy kiss in my entire body. He seemed to be deep in thought, not wanting to interrupt his musing; I just held him close to me.

"Jake, what about you?" Very hesitantly he motioned towards my still hard member; he was nervous and insecure about touching me. I grabbed his hand and my heart ached when I felt him flinch, apparently I grabbed him with too much force. I brought his hand to my lips, after kissing it I held it close to my chest.

"Thank you for thinking of me baby, but today is all about you." He gave me a shy smile and in a sudden burst of affection placed his arms around my neck and kissed me softly on the lips. My heart was soaring; my Seth kissed me again. I held him close not wanting this moment to ever end, I just laughed out loud without any reason in particular except the fact that I was ecstatic, he couldn't help but laugh with me.

Picking him up I walked out of the bathroom with him on my arms, I never wanted to let him go, this was the way it should always be, loving and happy. I placed him on our bed so he could take a nap, which judging by the sleepy look on his face, was desperately needed.

**Seth POV**

The past three weeks had been for lack of a better word, "interesting". Jake had been putting so much effort into trying to win my heart, I felt almost bad for not reciprocating his feelings, almost. But it was obvious he was using my own body against me and the fact that with every passing day I felt more attracted to him, did not help me at all.

Every day he would do something to try to seduce me, he gave me that best baths I've ever had, amazing massages that always left me panting, sated and happy or just the act of touching me in the most intimate ways possible. But it was not just about sex, he tried to romance me as well. Sometimes it would piss me off, because I felt he saw me as a girl, but I secretly loved all the candy and flowers he brought me.

But most important was our everyday life. With each passing day he would give me more freedom, not fast enough in my opinion, but it was something. Now I was able to leave the house and take short walks by myself as long as Jake was home, they were limited to their property and as with everything there were a million conditions, it was very amusing to see him watching me the whole time while trying to hide so I wouldn't notice. Jake needed to learn that a six foot nine dude was very hard to miss.

"Here Seth" Jake walked in our bedroom handing me the oldest dingiest clothes I've ever seen, I knew they were not mine so I assumed they belonged to him and would not fit me.

"Jake, these clothes are too big for me." I held the shirt in front of me inspecting it.

"They are not going to be that big Seth, those are from before the change triggered my growth spurt. Anyway you are not going to a party; we're going to work together in the garage"

"We're going to clean the garage?" I really didn't like the idea of chores, but welcomed the fact that it was something different that would help with the monotony of my days.

"Nope, I'm going to teach you to change the oil in the truck" There was a slight pride in his words, he was aware it was something he was really good at.

I got dressed hastily and chuckled noticing that even when Jake was two years younger than me he was still much bigger than I was. Walking downstairs we stopped in the kitchen so I could get a drink. Billy glared sideways toward me and went back to his newspaper. Jake held my hand the short walk to the garage and stopped to give me a chaste kiss before we got to work.

Jake was very patient and knowledgeable; he explained everything in detail and showed me step by step what I needed to do. Of course he had to rub himself against me every chance he got, I just glared at him and he gave me that awful smirk. After we were done I closed the hood of the car. I was struggling with something I've been meaning to ask for the past ten minutes, I decided to go for it.

"Jake, will you teach me how to drive? Sam was going to teach me as soon as I turned sixteen and got my permit, but it didn't happen." I trailed off and saw the sadness and pain in Jacob's eyes; he would never forgive himself for his actions the night of my birthday.

"Of course Seth, I will teach you." There was something hidden behind the sadness, hope maybe? I did ask him, I was not waiting to return to Sam's house to learn. I had already given up on the idea of ever going back, knowing that Jake would never allow it and when I thought about it, did I want to leave?

"Today?" I was already jumping up and down in anticipation. It was a very well-known fact I was not a very patient person and the idea of learning how to drive was incredibly exciting.

"Not today baby, I'm not ready for that just yet." I felt my face fall, and Jake seemed to notice just like he always did. He had a way of identifying my moods, just like I was able to read his.

"What do you mean_ you _are not ready? "

"I'm afraid to teach you and end up losing you." Ok, Jake was making no sense at all. But his emotion was evident, his heartbeat picked up and he was shaking slightly.

"Lose me how? In an accident? I promise to be very safe and do you forget I'm a freaking wolf? Even if I get hurt I'll heal quickly".

"Not to an accident but now that you mention it, that too. Seth, you know how terrified I am of you leaving me, what if I teach you and one day you get fed up with me and take off?"

"Jake, I've been fed up with you for four months and I'm still here. Doesn't that count for something?" I was treading dangerous waters, but I needed to stop being afraid of him.

"Not really Seth, you are not here voluntarily, I'm forcing you to stay. You don't love me, you are just afraid of me"

"Shit Jake, do you blame me for being afraid? It's not like we started off our relationship in good terms" Jake's face lit up like a fucking Christmas tree and I knew why, I called the mess that was our life a _relationship_ ugh. I messed up and with the king of taking things the wrong way.

Jake walked towards me grabbing me by the waist and sitting me on the hood of the truck. He located himself between my legs and wrapped his arms around me. The kiss that followed was soft, sensual and sweet. He licked my bottom lip requesting access that I granted, his tongue met mine in an interminable dance inside my mouth, it was not a battle for dominance they were equals in a quest for pleasure.

"Seth, I know you didn't mean to call what we have a relationship, but I hope that one day we will have a real relationship, one in which you will give me your trust and your love and baby please do not be afraid of me. I'm working really hard to deserve you, learning to control my wolf and my temper." I leaned forward resting my forehead against his. In my head I could see the effort he was putting into being a good mate, I knew he was making many sacrifices but he wouldn't tell me, I could see the exhaustion in his face and the dark circles around his eyes were clear indicators that while I was lounging off all day, he was working his butt off. But how could I convince my heart of all this, I was still afraid of his mood swings, his reactions, the possibility of getting raped a constant in our everyday life.

"Thank you for trying, Jake" I was completely sincere, I was glad he was trying, for both of us.

"Jake, Jaaake!" It was Quil's voice outside the garage. He walked in gasping when he caught a glimpse of us.

"Sorry man, your dad told me you were in the garage and I assumed you were alone. " Quil didn't even say hello to me, what's with that? Am I fucking invisible?

"As you can see I'm not alone so get out of here." Jake's whole expression changed and his voice sounded extremely annoyed. It was probably in Quil's best interest to leave as fast as his legs would carry him. Jake was trying to block me with his body like he didn't want Quil to see me.

"Ok, so I'll go, bye Seth" I pushed Jacob aside to be able to see Quil.

"Hi Quil, how are you? I haven't seen you in a while." Jake glared at me and I just smiled at him triumphantly. I tried to get off the car but Jake held me in place effectively blocking me from Quil's line of sight.

"Jake, why are you acting this way? It's Quil, one of your best friends, not a stranger." Using one of my recently found tricks I placed both hands on his chest and rubbed my cheek against his, the result was immediate and I felt him relax slightly. He didn't say anything, but allowed me to get off the car. I walked towards Quil with bounce on my step and a small smile of victory.

"That's close enough Seth, I mean it." I was probably six feet away from Quil, what's the hell crawled up Jake's butt today?

"Hi Quill, I guess this is as close as I'm allowed to talk to you. How is life treating you?" To say I was annoyed at Jake's stupidity was an understatement, but that was a conversation that would need to wait. I had not seen any of the guys in over a month and was interested on what was going on with them, especially Quil.

"Everything is good, same ol' same ol'" Reading between the lines I understood that things with Quil were anything but good, unfortunately we had a pissed off wolf watching us like a hawk.

"You know Quil, you can call me on the phone and we can talk and stuff." He nodded in understanding.

"Yeah I'll do that, talk to you then. Bye Jake." Quil left the garage without looking back as he was waving goodbye to Jake.

"Why did you treat Quil like he was an enemy? You can be such and asshole sometimes." Looking for an answer I walked towards Jake, staying a good six feet away from him, he motioned to start walking but I held up my hand to tell him to stay right where he was.

"I don't like you talking to Quil." Now he was being ridiculous, why wouldn't he want me to talk to a fellow pack brother and friend?

"You don't like me talking to anybody!" I didn't find his explanation that credible, there was something else.

"That's right, but it goes especially for Quil."

"Why?"

Jake averted his gaze looking at the floor while he played with the hem of his tattered t-shirt. He looked so fucking adorable like a little kid caught with his hand in the cookie jar, ok Seth stop it, you're pissed at him.

"I'm jealous of him." Jake's voice was nothing but a whisper and his face looked maroon with the blushing that covered it.

"Jake, you are being stupid, you are jealous of everybody. Why are you jealous? Nobody from the pack would even dare to touch me." This was the absolute truth, before Jake left any member of the pack would risk getting a broken bone for the crime of touching me or even teasing me. This attitude distanced me from the pack, making me feel like an outsider. When Jake left, they were a lot more at ease and the best was on my birthday when everybody congratulated me and we played that crazy game of football. Unfortunately I was sure everything would be the same as before he left, that is, if I'm ever allowed to talk to anybody.

"What makes Quil special?"

"Baby, since the day you went out to dinner with him I've had a feeling you two shared a secret. I was jealous because I felt you confided in him, while you didn't even want to talk to me. You were looking forward to being with him, when you didn't even want to breathe the same air as me." Jake's explanation made sense but only to him, as usual he was wrong, but unfortunately there was not much I could say to explain, without betraying Quil's trust.

"I remember that day; you acted like such a jerk. You were downright disgusting, jerking off and buttering me with your jizz." I motioned to start walking towards the house, the memory of that day made me fucking mad, I felt Jakes' hand grab mine.

"I'm sorry Seth, it's no excuse but I was even more insecure then that I am now. At least now you live with me, you talk to me and don't reject me as much anymore." I wouldn't look at him, all the old anger coming back to me in waves. Jake's heart picked up and he pulled me towards him in a tight embrace.

"Please Seth don't let this take you back to that time, it's been four months and I have changed and so have you" this was something he was totally right about, he had changed a lot from his Darth Vader days, now he acted a lot more human and was a lot more understanding. I changed too being less cynical and more accepting of our bond.

"Jake one of these days you are going to do something that will make you lose me forever and there will not be any amount of apologies that will save you." Jake was always throwing threats east and west, maybe it was my turn to threaten him.

"I know Seth, I'm painfully aware of that and pray that moment will never come." With this statement I left the garage, walking to the house by myself with Jake following me in his role of warden.

It was hard to stay angry at Jake, but today I was especially pissed off, his intransigence brought back a flood of bad memories that left a bitter taste in my mouth. Dinner was particularly quiet mainly because I refused to talk to him; if he was going to control my interaction with the outside world I was going to control our little universe. After dinner I went back to my room undressing and getting under the covers. Jake came in the bedroom but didn't sit on the bed like he usually did; he just stood next to me.

"Seth, you must be so tired of hearing me say sorry all the time but that's all I have. I have been a jerk to you but you have to admit I'm doing a lot better. Please at least give me that a little star for effort, please?" Shit why did he had to look so adorable and at the same time so fucking hot in his cutoffs?

Refusing to look at him I kept my eyes glued to the television.

"Ok, you're pissed, I get it, I'm going on patrol, see you in the morning." Grabbing my clothes Jake stormed out of the room; I could hear his heavy footsteps on the stairs. Hopefully I made my point and he would understand that all actions have consequences and he could not just alpha command them to disappear.

The next morning Jake came in the room early with a steaming cup of cocoa overflowing with marshmallows on one hand and a bunch of wildflowers on the other. My heart melted with the image of him getting up early, even after sleeping only a few hours after his patrol, just to pick flowers for me. I was already awake sitting in bed waiting for my clothes, so I could go downstairs to have breakfast.

"Good morning baby, I brought you something. I hope you like them." He timidly placed the cup of cocoa on the nightstand and handed me the flowers.

"I know they are not much, but I went early this morning to pick them for you, they even still have dew on them." Looking at the flowers I could picture him choosing the prettiest ones for me and I debated whether or not I should lift his punishment and talk to him again. After all, I was pissed about stuff that happened months ago and maybe it was time to start forgetting all those bad moments.

"They are beautiful Jake, thank you for getting them for me" I stood up to put them in the vase I had in my room, inhaling their sweet aroma, so similar to Jake's scent. Throwing away the withered bunch I had in it, I placed the fresh flowers in the vase and walked back to the bed. It was amazing that it didn't bother me at all to be naked in front of Jake anymore, after what seemed like a lifetime of him looking lustily at me, I was used to it.

"Seth I'm sorry about yesterday, wolves are very possessive with their mates, with jealousy dominating their reactions many times. I guess when it comes to you I'm more animal than human." There he goes again, blaming his wolf for his errors in judgment, he needed to grow up and accept his own mistakes if he ever intended to be happy with me.

"Jake, stop using your wolf as an excuse for messing up."

"You're partially right Seth, my wolf is very strong but I have to be stronger and smarter than him. Well, I had something I needed to ask you." Sitting on the bed next to me, he handed me the cup of cocoa from which I slurped, being careful not to burn myself. He looked nervous and worried; I couldn't read him like I usually did which bothered me tremendously.

"I thought it would be a good idea if we hum…. go out today?" His face was the picture of shyness, far from the arrogant alpha that I knew so well.

"What do you mean Jake? I couldn't help but be hopeful that what I was thinking was correct.

"Would you go out with me? Like … in a date?" I chuckled watching him struggle to find the right words.

"Let me see if I'm getting this, you want to take me out on a date?" Jake nodded "You do realize there is no need for it, you don't need to romance me, I'm your prisoner here." Looking around I realized that I was still mad at him and was acting like a jerk myself.

"You are not my prisoner Seth, you are my soul mate and I will do anything I consider is necessary to keep you safe by my side." Yeah right, since when was my safety his first concern? The main reason he brought me here was to fuck me, who did he think he was fooling? The worst thing was, that I was falling fast and hard and even though I was fighting it my heart was winning over my brain. But I liked the idea of going out too much to resist.

"Where are you planning to take me?" I saw a small twinkle in his eye.

"Would you like to go to the movies? There are a few good ones." He was right; I saw the commercials for a few that really caught my attention.

"What about Paranormal Activity 3? I love horror films." I knew he hated horror films so these made it even sweeter for me. I get to go out and have a little revenge, all in a convenient little package.

"Well yeah ok, I'll check the times." He was hesitant, he much rather watch an action film with lots of car chases but if he wanted a date, it was going to be on my terms.

The car ride into Forks was surprisingly relaxing; I didn't feel the tension that permeated the atmosphere the first time we went out. The movie theater was not very busy, something I was very thankful for because Jake wouldn't let go of my hand and I didn't feel comfortable being out in public like this. I still didn't accept the possibility that I might be gay and was not ready for the curious stares of the people in our small town. Once inside I stood to the side while Jake got in line to get popcorn, he was only a few steps away but I felt his nervousness at being so far from me in an unfamiliar place. He needed to get a grip of himself, it was not like we were so far, but leave it to Jake to be an over dramatic untrusting wolf.

A group of girls came in, talking and giggling, they seemed to be around our age, actually more Jake's than mine. I saw them eyeing Jake from the moment they came in the theater, they were whispering about how hot he was, one of them going as far as saying he had a nice ass. Well they could talk all they wanted; they could fuck him for all I cared.

They stood behind him to get popcorn and one of the bitches had the audacity to talk to him! He probably heard them talking about him and was more than flattered, he turned around and gave them a huge smile. He started making small talk glancing every once in a while in my direction. I felt angry and anxious to get out of there, why the fuck is this idiot behind the counter taking so long? Is it so hard to put popcorn in a container and take your money? My heart was racing and I was starting to feel like I couldn't breathe. I didn't understand or refused to accept the reason why I was feeling so angry, I was losing it fast, feeling my blood boil and my heart race. I was making up scenarios in my head in which each one of those girls ended up either inside the popcorn machine or the ice machine. The straw that broke the camel's back was when I saw a bottle blond slipping him a piece of paper, with what I guessed was her phone number.

Making my way to the happy bunch I grabbed Jake's hand pulling him towards me, only to stand on my tippy-toes and kiss him on the lips. He looked at me with a mixture of pride, surprise and joy.

"You know baby I changed my mind, I really don't want any popcorn, the movie is about to start and I don't want to miss the beginning. "Pulling him towards the theater where the movie was showing, we left the disappointed bunch. I chuckled internally hearing one of them say "damn it, he had to be gay, he was just too hot". Refusing to look at Jake I frantically looked for the theater number, going inside quickly, at least in the dark room he wouldn't be able to see that I was probably red as a beet with a mixture of embarrassment and anger.

Once inside he took the lead guiding me to the last row, I knew where this was going and didn't like it one bit. It was muggy inside the movie theater and it smelled like old nachos, popcorn and cheap cologne.

"Why sit so far in the back?" I was playing dumb, I knew the answer very well, but maybe it will make him change his mind.

"We can't really make-out if we are sitting in the front row, can we?" he said this with this insufferable smirk on his face.

"Who says I have any intention of making out with you?"

"Well, that little fit of jealousy you had out there tells me otherwise." I was not jealous, how dare he suggest something like that? To be jealous you need to have some type of feeling toward the person and I couldn't care less about him.

"I was not jealous, we came here to see the movie and I didn't want to miss the beginning."

"Oh I see, you were not jealous, that means that you won't have any problem with me calling this girl?" he took the small piece of paper out of his pocket teasingly waving it in front of my face. At wolf speed I grabbed the piece of paper and ripped it in as many pieces as I could. I wouldn't dare look at him; I didn't want to admit my weakness and jealousy. Yes I was jealous! I was fucking jealous of a bleached blond! There I said it, even if I was just admitting it to myself.

At that moment all the lights went off and the opening credits of the movie started playing. Jake placed his arm around my shoulders and pulled me towards him as much as the arm rest would allow.

"Baby you have no reason to be jealous, those girls mean nothing to me, it's like they don't exist. My heart has an owner, look into my eyes and you will see I belong only to you my love." I looked into his eyes only to find them overflowing with love and passion. I knew how much he loved me; unfortunately his great capacity for love was only surpassed by his capacity to be an asshole.

He kissed me softly stroking my hair while he did. Resting my head on his shoulder I sighed deeply and watched the movie. About ten minutes into the movie Jake sought my lips and kissed me passionately while running his free hand over my face and neck. I responded the kiss by taking initiative and pushing my tongue into his mouth, he seemed to like it and let out a quiet moan. We kissed for some time before his hand ventured lower, gently running it over my jean clad erection. Not wasting any time I mimicked his actions and grabbed the bulge in his pants, he jumped at the unexpected feeling, looking at me in disbelief.

"Let's see how quiet you can be Jake."

"Is that a challenge? I hope it is, because you know how much I love a good challenge." He whispered into my ear, his hot breath sending shivers all the way down to my groin.

I rubbed my hand across the front of Jake's black jeans, firmly stroking his rock-hard member, while smothering his neck and chest with a trail of kisses and nibbles. Jake's breath was becoming more and more labored and he bit his lower lip trying to prevent any noise from escaping. I knew he was lost into the sensations when he let go of my crotch and grabbed forcefully the arm rest, I truly hoped he didn't break it.

Jake had his eyes closed and a look of pure pleasure in his face, repeatedly biting his lips and licking them to soothe the bite. I stilled my motions, sitting straight in my seat with my eyes fixated on the screen. I had to bite the inside of my cheek, to prevent me from bursting out laughing when he turned to look at me with a look that read, what the fuck?

"That's what you get for flirting with those girls." I could tell he was pissed and frustrated, fidgeting in his seat trying to get his pants to feel more comfortable, good luck with that, Jakey.

**Thank you for reading and please if you liked it let me know by leaving me a review. If you didn't like it leave a review letting me know what will make it better. Each one of you is very important to me and that's why I try to answer each one of your questions.**

**In every chapter I leave hints of what's to come, I hope you were able to find the ones in this chapter, until next time…**


	25. Chapter 25 Never Again

**Hello everybody, I want to thank all the readers, especially the ones that added me to their favorites and story alerts. **

**Those of you who took the time to review thank you… thank you… thank you… you're awesome! You will never know how much each and every one of your reviews mean to me. Really guys every review alert I get on my e-mail bring a smile to my face.**

**Disclaimer: I don't own Twilight or any of their characters.**

Chapter 25 Never again

Seth POV

Jake didn't speak to me throughout the rest of the movie, our only interaction was the few occasions he got scared and sought my hand for comfort. I felt truly evil for what I did but was very pleased with myself for resisting when my body, not to mention my wolf, was begging me to continue. Even though I constantly pushed her to the back of my mind, my wolf needed to please Jake's wolf and kept pestering me about it. When the movie ended we stood up as soon as they turned on the lights, Jake held my hand as we made our way to the exit. The parking lot was pretty much deserted, with less than ten cars left. The truck roared to life and we were on our way. After a few minutes into the drive I noticed Jake was driving away from La Push.

"Where are we going?" I was confused and somewhat worried, it was after midnight and even though I didn't have a curfew, I was well aware that there were not many places open after midnight in Forks.

"You'll see." Jake broke the silence just to give an answer that didn't shed any light into my question.

We got off the highway into a dirt road on our right; it was pitch black, the only source of light coming from the trucks' headlights. I could see that each side of the road was bordered by tall trees, the briny smell in the air made it clear we were driving toward the seashore. Jake parked the truck on the side of the road getting off the car hastily and went around to open my door. Ok, here is where I drew the line; I'm not a chick, I didn't need anybody to open doors for me, some girls even felt insulted if you tried. Opening the door myself before he could reach it, I got off the truck, gently pushing him aside.

Looking around, I was able to focus on the oddly familiar place. I knew where we were! The cliffs where he brought me in our first date, the one that ended in a total disaster. What was he thinking? Were we going to cliff dive at night? Was he planning to finish what he started that day?

"Jake, what are we doing here?" I asked nervously, while at the same time debating if I should make a run for it or give him the benefit of the doubt and stick around.

"I love these cliffs and the first time I brought you here, ended badly. I felt I owed it to myself and to you to vindicate myself by creating a good memory from this place."

Jake started walking towards the edge of the cliffs and I couldn't help but worry that he would miscalculate and fall down, hurting himself. I breathed in relief when he stopped a safe distance from the edge, I situated myself next to him and when I lifted my eyes to look at him, I was taken aback by the person standing beside me.

In this place unspoiled by artificial illumination the moon and the stars were the only source of light, giving everything around us an air of mysticism. The moonlight was making Jakes whole body shimmer with a mysterious glow that made him look both dangerous and beautiful. The effect of the moonlight on him had a hypnotic effect on me, his bewitching features playing games with my mind. His profile was perfectly defined with a strong jaw, high cheekbones and long eyelashes. The shape of his lips was perfectly clear, the slight curvature of his bottom lip inviting me to nibble on it. My Jake was truly a beautiful creature, my mate was breathtaking.

His gaze was fixated in the horizon, I observed him, silently wishing I could read his mind. Looking into the dark expanse in front of us, I tried to figure out what was so fascinating about the barely visible view. I was humbled when I realized I failed to see the beauty of what was in front of me, the ocean was dark, scary and dangerous, but at the same time its grandiosity was only surpassed by all the emotions it was capable of stirring in the human soul. This ocean was… my Jake.

Without saying a word, Jake sat down on the sandy cliff, his long legs stretched before him, leaning back and holding himself up with his hands, his head slightly tilted to the side. He looked deep in thought and I couldn't help but wonder why he was so quiet, but wouldn't dare break the silence. I sat down next to him making sure to be close enough to be able to rest my head on his shoulder, he inhaled deeply kissing the top of my head lovingly.

Together we observed the shadows on the ocean, produced by the clouds moving in front of the moon in their unstoppable journey around the earth. The crisp ocean air carried Jake intoxicating scent surrounding me with it, making me yearn for his touch. Jake repositioned himself on his spot placing one of his long arms around my shoulders. I took the chance to snuggle to his side, nuzzling his neck and surrounding his torso with my arms.

This had to be the most perfect moment of my entire life, sitting on the most romantic place I had ever been to, with the most amazing man and life partner anybody could wish for. Jake grabbed one of my hands, interlacing our fingers together only to bring both hands to his lips and kiss mine tenderly.

I moved myself so I was sitting between his legs, action that made Jake purr in delight. Leaning against his chest I could feel the strength with which his heart beats, knowing that it only beats for me. I placed a trail of kisses starting on his chest, slowly getting up so I was kneeling between his legs; I continued my journey towards his lips, only stopping to nibble on his delicious neck.

Jake hugged me close to his body, pulling me by the waist so my body was effectively shaping itself to his. I sought his lips capturing them in a heated kiss, this time neither one of us had to request access; it was automatic, like we had been born to love each other.

The kiss went on for what seemed like hours but was not long enough. The kiss turned my blood to lava, hot and unforgiving; filling me to the brim with desire and need. He established his dominance making love to me with his lips; the memory of how able his lips really were sending a spastic shiver that started on my lips and ended in my toes. Running my hands down his neck towards his chest I was disconcerted when he moaned loudly, Jake grabbed my ass, making me grind myself against his stomach.

I had an idea but needed to test my theory, nibbling slowly and ever so gentle, I found the same area where my hands elicited the moan out of him. Just as I expected he gasped and continued moaning more with every passing second. His hands massaged my ass greedily with steady and determined movements.

"I found your sweet spot, didn't I?" I whispered on his ear and felt his whole body shiver in delight when my hot breath reached him.

"Yes, my love. If you keep kissing me like that you're going to make me cum without even touching me." His voice was low and filled with sensuality. I put myself to work, that was, if it could be called work, to me it was an exhilarating experience, it was the first time I took charge of pleasuring him and I was enjoying every second of it. My lips worked overtime kissing, licking and nibbling the sides of his neck, I could even feel the veins pulsing against my lips. It didn't take long for Jake to start shaking while screaming my name and some other obscenities. When he calmed down I pulled his sweaty forehead towards me, he snuggled against my chest sighing deeply.

"Thank you Seth, I love you"

"You're welcome Jake." He pulled away from me, looking intently into my eyes; I knew he was waiting for me to say I loved him too, but in all honesty I couldn't. I found him incredibly handsome and when he was not acting like a dick, he was really nice. But I didn't love him, at least not yet.

Even though disappointment twisted his beautiful features he smiled and nuzzled his face against my chest, making me giggle.

"I know that one day you'll love me Seth." If anybody asked me a month ago I would've immediately answered _hell no! _But right now under the starry sky, confusion and self-doubt dominated my thoughts.

The whole way back Jake wouldn't stop smiling, I felt self-conscious enough as it was and he was pissing me off. I let down all my defenses and gave in to the imminent need to please him. This stupid imprint was playing games with my head and the worst part was that I wasn't sure anymore where I stood with the whole thing.

"Thank you for bringing me to the cliffs tonight and I'm sorry for the way I acted in the movie theater." I felt guilty for the way I acted, first acting like a jealous idiot in front of those girls and then teasing Jake, just to leave him all hot and bothered, well that one he kind of deserved.

"Don't apologize my Seth, do you have any idea what your actions meant for me? For the first time you showed me that you have feelings for me." I began to refute but he stopped me. "Don't even try to deny it, I know you are not ready to accept the fact that your feelings toward me are changing, but I know. So many things about you are different, the way you look at me, how tender and loving you are, the way you respond to my kisses." We were in our bedroom, standing in front of each other, my arms loosely wrapped around his waist with him caressing my face and my hair.

"So you are not angry because I left you hanging?" I would've been livid if Jake did something like that to me.

"I'm not going to lie, Seth. At first I was really pissed off and almost dragged you out of the theater to make you finish what you started, even if I had to command you to do it. But I took a deep breath and remembered how hard we have been working to build our relationship and decided to be the bigger man and just let it go." Wow and again wow, he was really changing, the old Jake wouldn't have thought twice about ordering me to please him. I was so happy he decided to act the way he did, his restrain was determining for everything that transpired in this magical night.

"Thank you for controlling your wolf Jake; I can only guess how hard it must be."

"I do it for us baby, you are worth it." He leaned forward and kissed me slowly, lovingly, with the certainty that his feelings were being reciprocated. I'm glad he was so sure, because I had no idea what I was feeling.

"Its late love, give me your clothes so we can both get to sleep"

"Jake when are you going to give up on this shit? I know it's a way to make me submit, but is it necessary? Especially now?" All the warm good feeling I had on my chest was chased away by Jake's request, why did he have to be such a douche bag?

"Soon baby, please don't be angry, this has been the best night of my life so far. Please don't let my insecurities spoil it." He understood he was acting like an idiot, then why in the name of everything good and decent, did he keep doing it?

"Whatever." I took off my clothes and flung them to him before I got under the covers with my back towards him. I felt the bed dip and warm arms surrounding me, while he hesitantly kissed my neck and cheek.

"Please baby don't do this, I promise you that things are going to change very soon."

"I get it; things will change after you fuck me right? And since you think I'm falling in love, you're sure it will happen very soon."

"You couldn't be more wrong Seth, you misjudge me entirely. I hope you accept us and give yourself to me fully, but that will not determine or change any of my decisions regarding the way I treat you. Really Seth, I thought you knew me better." I could see in his eyes how much my accusation hurt him making me feel like the lowest worm to ever crawl out of the ground.

"I'm sorry Jake, I trust you a lot more now, but I still have that nagging feeling that after we have sex everything will go to shit. It hurts to think that's all you want from me but I can't help it." In the back of my mind I still thought all he wanted from me was my ass and it was painful to accept that as a possibility.

"I guess you will see for yourself when after we make love, I'm even more loving and considerate with you." I placed my arms around his neck and pulled him towards me kissing him softly at first, only to deepen the kiss a second later. Jake responded by placing himself on top of me with only fabric separating us, he held himself up with his forearms so all his weight wouldn't be on me, while he kissed my whole face starting with my forehead, them my eyelids, my nose and ending on my lips, which he claimed in a heated kiss. I had to admit to myself, that I loved feeling his weight on me, being dominated like that made my heart beat faster and my body feel all tingly.

"Shit Seth you have no idea the power you have over me, with one gesture you can lift me up to the heavens or send me down to the pits of hell." I smirked at his admission and whimpered lightly when he pulled away from me, Jake stood next to the bed looking like he was debating whether or not to leave. Almost like he was reading my mind he answered my wordless plea, "Baby there is only one thing I would love more than to stay here and sleep with you, but I almost lost control once today and can't risk it."

"I know what that thing is, to make love to me, right?" I said in a sing-song voice without a hint on recrimination.

"Wrong again Seth, it's to hear you say… you love me." His words disarmed me completely, would I ever be able to say those words to him?

Jake left the room and I allowed sleep to take me to a dreamland in which Jake and I were uninhibited lovers, partners and friends.

"No Seth, please no!" disconcerted after being awoken so sudden I couldn't organize my thoughts. What the hell? Looking at the clock I read it was 3:40am. Who could Jake be talking to in the middle of the night?

"No no no, not my Seth!" There he is again, he sounds panicky and it's related to me. Widely awake now I needed to see what was going on with Jake. His room was next to mine and since Billy slept in the main floor I was free to walk around regardless of the fact I almost never wore clothes. Opening the door slowly I peeked in his room only to see him sprawled on the bed naked as the day he was born, sweat covering his body, his pillow on the floor as evidence of his restless sleep.

"Seth, not my Seth, Seth!" He kept repeating my name while his whole body shook and twitched. He kept crying out my name, it was sad and painful to watch. Walking in the room I sat on the bed next to him, I felt a very strong need to hold him and to protect him, to chase the bad dreams away.

"Jake, wake up, Jake" placing my hand on his shoulder I shook him carefully, staying alert because I've heard of people being aggressive if they are startled while having a nightmare. It took me a minute but he woke up, unfortunately he was completely disoriented and scared.

"Where is Seth? Seth?" Jake was terrified and kept calling my name even though I was right in front of him.

"Jake, is me Seth, I'm right here, it was just a nightmare." I didn't know what to do; the pain I was feeling watching him go through this trampled any fear I had and any concerns for my own safety. Grabbing his face between my hands I made him look directly at me and kissed him softly on the lips, Jake needed me right now.

Jake whole form was shaking and he held on to me like I was a life preserver and he was drowning. It was unbelievable to see, how a dream could transform a man as strong and dominating as Jake, into a scared little kid.

"My Seth, you're here, you're ok." he kept repeating over and over again the same words, while holding on to me and burying his head in the crook of my neck. I just kept my arms around him, rubbing his back in a calming matter.

We stayed in our embrace until he calmed down, when his breathing slowed down and his heart was beating in its normal rhythm again, I pulled back to look at him. Cleaning with my thumbs the few tears that were still escaping from his eyes I pressed my forehead against his and felt him inhale deeply.

"I'm fine Jake; you were just having a bad dream, you want to talk about it?"

"I don't remember exactly, it was more like flashes of faces and the feeling that we were being separated. It was so scary I kept calling your name but couldn't see you. Seth, if I lose you, I would die, I wouldn't have the strength to keep going if you were not by my side." Jake was truly scared and I felt so helpless with the whole situation, there was not much I could do but reassure him that I was here with him.

"Jake, if you want me to, I can stay here with you, it wouldn't be the first time I shared this bed with you." I chuckled at the memory of the day I stayed in this room with him, everything that happened the next morning making me blush in confusion and anger.

"I would like that Seth thank you, will you hold me? Please." Lying down next to him I placed my arms around him and held him, trying to protect him from his own dreams. He cuddled next to me and even though he was so much bigger than I was; he still fit curled into my body, like two pieces of a puzzle.

The next morning found us together in bed, naked and curled into each other's body like two lovers. When the first morning rays hit me I groggily tried to shake the sleep away from my eyes. When I was able to focus the first thing I saw was Jake's loving gaze.

"Good morning beautiful."

"Jake, who the heck are you talking to, because one thing I'm not, is beautiful first thing in the morning." Jake's amused chuckle was a clear sign that he was in a good mood, very different from the night before.

"I'm talking to you silly, you have no idea how it feels to wake up and see you next to me. This is how I want it to be, to wake up next to you every morning, for the rest of our lives." He kept stroking my hair, while looking at me with a mixture of love and emotion that was almost palpable.

At that moment I realized that we must have shifted during our sleep and I was burrowed into his body with my head resting on his chest and our legs intertwined. With one arm he was rubbing lazy circles on my back while running the other through my hair; it didn't even bother me that our sexes were only inches from each other.

"Thank you for coming to my room last night and helping me get over that nightmare. It was hard to shake off the feeling that it was real, it was so scary my angel." why did he have to be so sweet to me? He disarmed me completely. When he was acting like an obnoxious bastard, it was easy, that Jake I understood and could defend myself against. The sweet innocent Jake was very hard to understand and even harder to resist.

* * *

><p>"You're going down, wolf girl!"<p>

"That's what you think squirt, I still have a few aces under my sleeve" Leah frantically manipulated the controls of my game console.

"You're dead meat Leah, accept your defeat!" I knew this game like the back of my hand and was just giving her some rope so she could hang herself.

"Never, when did you get so good in this fucking game?"

"Shit, Leah look around you, what do you think I do all day? Since Jake brought my X-box from the house that's all I do. He even got me a new game."

"Damn it Seth, you must be so bored."

"Yeah, but what can I do?"

"You never leave the house?"

"Yes I do, I'm not allowed to go in the woods but I can take short walks as long as Jake is home and I don't leave the property." To anybody the idea of walking in circles may seem trivial, but to me it was a big step in the right direction.

"I don't know how you do it Seth; I would've slashed my wrists by now."

"And what good would that do? I would heal and Jake would be pissed"

"So what? If he gets pissed, tough."

"You don't understand Leah, Jake does everything for me without complaining, quite the contrary, he seems to enjoy cooking for me, cleaning our room and all the little things he does for me." I could feel the blush that was probably making my face look maroon, hopefully Leah wouldn't notice.

"Why are you blushing Seth?" Shit, why did she have to be so observant?

There was no way I was giving her details of my life with Jake. The fact that he was the closest thing I ever had to a friend. The way we made each other laugh, how he listened to every stupid thing I had to say. How we craved each other's company and how my heart leapt for joy every time I heard him come in the house after a long day apart.

The baths he would give me, which always ended up with me having mind blowing orgasms. He even gave me massages, according to him, to help me relax. The only problem was that I always ended up tensing even more, but in a good way. Each time he got more daring, exploring my body like it was his own personal treasure map. He had gone as far as inserting a finger in my ass, after several times it didn't even hurt anymore, it actually felt good.

He was very gentle with me, always trying to find ways to show me how much he loved me, Whether he was just keeping me company or making me blush furiously by touching me in the most intimate way possible, it was all about me, he never asked me to touch him, but expected to be allowed to touch me, without fear of rejection.

I especially needed to maintain what transpired on the cliffs under the strictest secrecy. That had been by far the best night of my life and Jake's life too, it was the most intimate moment we had shared so far. We felt so close to each other, so happy to be part of each other's life; we couldn't stop smiling for days. I still felt embarrassed and self-conscious about it, but couldn't help smiling every time I looked at him, especially when I caught a sight of the two bluish lines on each side of his neck.

"Planet earth calling Seth, hello!" Leah was waving her hand in front of my face in an attempt to make me pay attention.

"Why were you blushing a few minutes ago? What were you thinking just now? You looked like your mind was a thousand miles from here." She was very amused and genuinely curious.

"None of your business Leah." That reply earned me a round of tickles, Leah attacked me without mercy. That was until the bed sheet I had covering my naked lower half slid off, exposing me.

"Shit Seth, can you do me a big favor and put some clothes on. I'm sick and tired of looking at your dick every time this damn thing falls off." She was a picture of embarrassment and looked really annoyed, covering her eyes with her forearm, while holding the bed sheet up with her other hand.

I felt my face fall; grabbing the sheet I wrapped it for the umpteenth time around my waist. I knew there was nothing I could do about it; I didn't have access to any of my clothes and Jake didn't leave anything out for me before leaving.

"Sorry Leah, I don't have any clothes, Jake is keeping them and of course he hasn't told me where he is storing them. Anyway, even if I had clothes I'm not allowed to wear anything to our bed." I saw Leah cringe when I said _our bed_. She had not forgiven Jake for everything that happened in Sam's house the night of my birthday and detested the fact that I was living with him.

"Lee Lee, don't be sad, I'm happy. Jake is taking really good care of me; his main purpose in life is to make me happy. I know he loves me, he shows me every day with little things, like making my favorite meals, watching my favorite shows and even bringing me flowers." I directed my gaze to the simple vase that contained a beautiful bunch of wildflowers Jake brought me the day before and couldn't help but smile.

"Since mom and dad passed away I have not felt the kind of unconditional love he gives me, I know that if it came to it, he would give his life for me. Please don't feel bad, I know you and Sam love me unconditionally, the same way I love you guys, but with Jake it's just different."

"Do you realize that you are speaking about Jake with such pride and adoration that it sounds almost like you are in love with him? Seth, do you love him?" Leah's voice was barely a whisper; she held my hands while leaning over trying to find my eyes, which I've fixated on an undetermined spot on my lap.

"I don't know Leah, I don't think so. I'm grateful that he treats me well and doesn't hurt me, but I'm still a prisoner. He has taken away what I cherished the most, my freedom." With this admission I felt a few tears escape my eyes, rolling down my cheeks and ending on my lap.

"Ok, please Seth, don't cry, I came here to be with you and have fun, not to get you upset. I have an idea; you can't wear clothes while on this bed right? Why don't you sit on that chair?" She pointed to the old chair by the desk.

"Sure, but that doesn't make clothes magically appear"

"Stupid, borrow some of Jake's clothes, there must be something in his room that'll fit you"

I had to admit the idea was very appealing, it would feel good to not be naked in front of my sister. Holding the bed sheet around me, I ran to Jake's room. His room was surprisingly tidy considering he worked a lot and all his free time he spent with me. Looking through his drawers I found a pair of basketball shorts and a grey t-shirt. The clothes fit me kind of funny, like a small kid wearing his father's clothes; thank goodness he always wears his shirts two sizes too small, making at least the shirt just ok for me, just a little long.

His scent permeated in the room, I sat on his bed grabbing his pillow and inhaling his scent. I missed him, he had been gone since early in the morning, I just saw him briefly when he came in the room to kiss me goodbye. He had patrol this afternoon so I knew he was coming home late. Home, more than once I caught myself calling my old home, Sam's house and this one my home. I guessed my home was wherever Jake was.

Walking toward my room I stood by the door, modeling for Leah the latest fashions. She cheered enthusiastically clapping her hands in delight.

"That's more like it, now I can concentrate on the game. You are going down... submissive."

"Don't fucking call me that! I hate it, it's humiliating!" didn't she know I hated that word with passion? It implied that I was a defenseless little freak that needed to be protected and controlled.

"Sorry Seth, I was just trying to throw you off your game, you know how competitive I am."

"Ok but don't say it again!" I sat down huffing.

We played for a while before Billy's voice echoed in the house.

"Leah, Seth can you come down?" Strange, Billy only talked to me when it was absolutely necessary.

After putting down the controls we went downstairs, only to find Billy at the bottom of the stairs waiting for us.

"Emily called and asked me to let Leah know that dinner was ready and she needs to get home. She also offered to send home some stew if somebody goes and gets it because she can't bring it."

"I can't bring it, I have patrol in an hour and if I'm late again Jake is going to have me doing doubles. Seth, why don't you walk over with me and bring it back?"

"I'm sorry Leah but I'm not allowed to walk that far. Jake will flip if he comes home and doesn't find me here." I looked pleadingly at my sister, I was hungry and Emily's stew was legendary.

"Seth, I'm sure Jake would appreciate a nice meal after a long day of work and patrol, right now we are probably going to have sandwiches for dinner. If Jake gets here before you come back, I'll tell him I asked you to go get some food at Sam's. He trusts you a lot more now, it'll be ok." Billy looked sincere and I decided to trust him.

"Ok I'll go." I didn't need much convincing, I was ecstatic, it was the first time in over a month I was going to leave the Black's property.

Leah and I took off, walking in amicable companionship all the way to Sam's house, every once in a while a light ruffling of leaves or a small critter would startle me. I kept looking over my shoulder expecting Jake to jump out of the forest at any moment.

When we got there I ran to Emily's arms and embraced her in a bear hug.

"Seth, it's so good to see you! I couldn't believe it when Billy called saying you were coming over." She was beaming, her brown eyes shining with the emotion we both felt; I've missed her so much.

"But I'm not going to keep you long; Billy asked me to have everything ready so you could go back immediately, we don't want to tempt fate." She smiled but it didn't reach her eyes, I understood it was not that she didn't want me to visit; she wanted to keep me safe.

I headed back walking hastily, I would run but was afraid of spilling the food and it would've been for nothing. The short walk to Sam's house infused me with a lot of energy, I felt happy and free for the first time in what felt like an eternity. Jake's house, my home, was not that far ahead, my heart fluttered for reasons I didn't understand or failed to acknowledge. A small chuckle escaped my lips at the realization that I was going to see Jake in less than an hour. What's wrong with me? I hate him, no, I don't hate him anymore. Do I love him? No way! I had to stop when I bumped into a wall, wait what? Who the hell built a wall in the middle of…?

"WHERE WERE YOU?" Jake bellowed at me.

I took a step back lifting my hands in a classic surrender pose.

"Jake...I ...Emily..." I couldn't construct a coherent thought much less a sentence. My reflex was to shrink into myself and try to hide, but it was useless.

"Who gave you permission to leave the house and go see Emily? It was Leah, wasn't it? I knew it was a bad idea to allow her to visit you. That's one mistake I'm never making again." I felt part of me die when I looked into Jake's eyes, they were completely black, he was allowing the wolf to take over.

"Seth, this is it, your third strike, let's go home, today you will submit once and for all. I'll pound you into submission like I should've done months ago. I warned you, let's get home fast; I need to get you in bed and under me as soon as possible." He grabbed me roughly by the arm, digging his fingers in my flesh; I could almost feel the bruises forming. I couldn't find my voice, the pain in my chest was only overpowered by the insane amount of fear I was feeling.

He was dragging me toward the house when we spotted Billy wheeling himself as fast as he could towards us.

"Billy, whatever it is needs to wait, Seth and I have something to settle, call Sam and ask him to cover my patrols for the rest of the week, I won't be able to leave Seth's side after I'm done with him." Jake said everything in one breath. I glared at Billy; did he do it on purpose?

"Son, stop and listen." Billy's voice carried with it an authority much bigger that any alpha command I had ever heard. Jake stopped walking to listen to his father, his grip tighter with every passing minute.

"I gave Seth permission to go to Sam's house to get some food for us. I was in the bathroom when you came in the house and you didn't hear me when I called you, I guess you were already outside." At least he kept his word; I knew he hated me, but you don't get to be a tribal elder by being dishonest and unfair.

"And who are you, to grant any permission to my submissive?"

"I'm your father and you will watch your tone, I don't care how big you are, you will not disrespect me, understood?" Billy might be stuck in a wheelchair, but he was still Jake's father and he demanded respect.

Jacob was flabbergasted moving his head from side to side, alternating between looking at Billy and at me. He slumped his shoulders in defeat and eased the grip he had on my arm, without letting go.

"Let's go home, we have to talk about this and set clear limits to Seth's restrictions."

I couldn't take it any longer, how dare he?

"I'm not your fucking pet Jacob" I was beyond furious, he felt entitled to make decisions about everything in my life. I accepted everything so far, we were doing so well and he had to go and screw it up.

"Seth, I suggest you keep your mouth shut, regardless of what my father said, you knew very well you were not allowed to leave the property. It was clear defiance on your part; consider yourself lucky if I don't punish you. Any dominant would at least give his submissive a spanking for doing what you did, that is of course, after pounding them deep and hard to make them remember who they belong to."

"Fuck you Jacob!" I didn't care anymore; this was going to end today.

"What did you say?" Jacob's massive form moved menacingly toward me.

"What you heard asshole, fuck you Jacob Black! I HATE YOU!" With these words I slammed the food on Billy's lap before taking off running toward the house, barely avoiding Jacob's hand when he tried to grab me.

I ran inside the house and upstairs as fast as my legs would take me. I knew it didn't make any sense to run towards the house, when I could've tried to escape. In my heart I knew that any escape attempt was futile, Jacob would find me and I would wish to never been born. I was shaking violently while removing my clothes; I knew what I needed to do. I didn't want to do this and for sure was not ready, but he left me no other choice. I sat on the bed waiting for him.

The noises coming from the first floor alerted me that Jacob was back inside the house, he probably had to wheel his father back in the house and that slowed him down. I heard his heavy footsteps as he approached the bedroom.

Taking a calming breath I braced for impact, at that same moment the bedroom door flew open and he walked in locking it behind him.

"Seth Clearwater you will never, listed to me, NEVER going to speak to me like that again."

"It's not going to happen again Jacob." I answered calmly, accepting my fate gave me the peace I needed to go through with this.

"Jacob, I'm done I don't have the strength or the desire to fight anymore." He started talking, but I stopped him. "Fuck me and get it over with."

"What? You are going to submit to me willingly?" A shimmer of hope appeared in his eyes but it was short lived.

"I'm not submitting and before you ask I don't love you and never will. All you wanted from me since you imprinted was my ass and that's all you will have. I'm not living in fear anymore, constantly walking on eggshells around you, is not fair. I never asked for an imprint, shit I never asked to be a wolf; Mother Nature has a twisted sense of humor and imposed on me this punishment. In the last few weeks I deluded myself into thinking you really cared for me and that I cared for you too, but I'm not wasting my time dreaming about happy endings." I had to stop to clear my throat that was becoming so tight it was almost unbearable.

"Today you will claim me; I'll stay here and be your sex toy for the rest of my life, as short or as long as it may be. I put the tube of lubricant on the table in case you want to use it, if you want to go at it dry, I don't care, do whatever you want. Just get it over with and stop torturing me."

I stood up from the bed, walking toward Jacob like I was in autopilot. He remained on the same spot he was when I started talking, watching me, probably trying to decipher if this was a bluff. Unfortunately this was not a bluff; I was not going to start laughing saying _tricked you. _When I reached him I unbuttoned his cutoffs and opened the zipper. He grabbed both my hands with one of his and with the other the tilted my chin up trying to make me look at him. I couldn't look him in the eye; I was in too much pain.

"What are you doing baby?" His words were hesitant, leaving his lips slowly and almost scared.

"I'm taking your pants off." I answered flatly; I bowed my head diverting my gaze back to his pants.

"But ... why are you doing that now?"

"To hurry things along, you have waited long enough, haven't you? Come to the bed and fuck me Jacob." I lifted my gaze to look at him, something in my appearance made him gasp, but I wasn't going to ask and I really didn't care.

Turning around and walking back to the bed I climbed up, getting on all fours I rested my head on my forearms before muttering. "Jacob, come to bed now." It was not a command or a question, just five random words.

I closed my eyes and felt a few tears escape my eyes. The bed dipped on my right side and I prepared myself for what was coming, Jacob mounting me. Instead I felt his hands on my waist pulling me towards him placing me on his lap.

"You want me to ride you, is that it?" I tried to get my hands in his pants to bring out his cock, he grabbed my hands again and tried to make me look at him, but I just shook my head.

"Seth, we need to talk." He sounded alarmed.

"No we don't, that's not what I'm here for. You brought me here to be your bitch, that's all I'm going to be." It was extremely painful to accept and admit my destiny. Since Jake and I started getting closer I've felt like I was an important part of his life, but I was mistaken, I was nothing to him.

"Stop saying that, I love you Seth, it's killing me to see you like this, please snap out of it, you're scaring me!"

I threw my head back laughing like I was demented "I'm scaring you? Me, a worthless submissive is scaring the all mighty alpha?"

"You are not worthless Seth, you mean to me more than my own life."

"Whatever you say" I crawled back to my previous spot in the middle of the bed, this time I laid down on my back and opened my legs exposing myself to him.

He jumped towards me and pushed my legs together, pulling me towards him and encasing me in a tight hug.

"Please Seth, snap out of it." I couldn't respond; I was on the verge of sanity. Jacob should be happy; he was able to break me. I felt myself starting to get dizzy, my breathing was coming out in shallow pants and blackness engulfed me before losing touch with all my senses.

"SETH, SETH please baby wake up!" I heard Jacob's panicked voice through the dark and unrelenting fog that was my mind.

Slowly I was regaining consciousness, but that made all the pain take hold of me once again. I didn't want to wake up, I would rather stay asleep, at least that way I wouldn't feel this crushing pain that was killing me. Struggling against consciousness and refusing to listen to Jacob's voice I kept my eyes closed hoping that the comforting darkness would envelop me again.

"My Seth please baby, I'm so sorry, never again. I swear I'll never do this again" his cries were heartbreaking.

I felt the darkness leave me and slowly opened my eyes, my lids felt heavy and my sight was out of focus, I was concerned until I realized I was crying. Jacob held me in a tight embrace cradling me on his lap.

"Thank goodness, Seth I'm so sorry, this will never happen again. I swear to you right now that things are going to change. From this moment everything is going to be different, I'm giving you your clothes, your phone, your freedom and all the other things I've taken away from you." His voice sounded strained and desperate, talking so fast I was having a hard time understanding him.

"I love you so much, please never doubt it. I've made so many mistakes and bad decisions but I'm not a bad person, just stupid sometimes. If I ever see you broken like that again, especially knowing I was the cause of all your sorrow, I won't be able to live with myself."

I struggled to find my voice, it was important to ask him the question that's been plaguing me since I regained consciousness.

"Jake you're ... letting me go? You are giving me back my freedom?"

"If that's what would make you happy, you got it baby." A chocked sob escaped Jacob's lips at this admission. He was giving me my freedom, I was free to go, no more jail, no more limits, nobody controlling my every move. No more Jacob, no more friendship... no more love.

Sitting up on his lap I looked for his eyes but he avoided my gaze, his eyes locked in an undetermined point on the floor. He was hurting, the pain in his soul was so abundant it felt like it was spilling out through his pores and becoming a living breathing being. I felt so fucking confused, but why? He was offering exactly what I wanted, to be freed from this prison. A part of me, one bigger than I cared to admit, wanted to stay, to share my life with him for the rest of our lives.

With my index finger I lifted his chin to make him look at me, he resisted at first but eventually complied. The pain and sadness in his eyes made me feel like somebody rammed their fists into my chest and was squeezing the life out of my heart. I wanted to make that sadness go away, but at what cost? My own happiness was on the line, I've always been a selfish bastard, why change now?

"I want my freedom Jake, I'm tired of you controlling everything, what I eat, who I talk to, even my clothes or lack thereof."

"I understand my love, but… could you please give me another chance." Jake's voice was barely a whisper.

"You messed up Jake; we have been doing so much better. I felt we were friends, maybe even more than friends, but you had to go ahead and turn all our progress to shit. You have been deceiving me, earning my trust and for what? So you could just trick me into submitting to you." It felt amazingly good to speak without fear. I was not afraid of him anymore, if it came to it and he changed his mind and raped me, well so be it, to hell with it. Today it ends for us, he took everything away from me, he had been my warden; he kept me as his prisoner, torturing me every day.

Standing up I grabbed the clothes I had been wearing and got dressed again and started walking toward the door.

"Seth you can't go, STOP." the double timbre of the alpha command resonated in the whole room, making me go blind with fury.

"Don't you dare pull that alpha crap now Jake! This is your fault; you messed up, not me. I can't take it anymore, don't you understand? I thought you were a man of your word not a charlatan, you said you were going to give me my freedom and I want it, now."

"You're right Seth… you can go." Feeling lighter after he lifted the alpha command I stood a few steps from the bedroom door, this time it was me who looked over my shoulder.

"Bye Jacob, like I said, this is all your fault; it could have been different, if you just had a little bit of restraint and common sense." His bitter sob was painful to hear, I was rubbing salt on the wound, I was being cruel, but he deserved it, right?

"I know... I'm sorry and hopefully you will find it in your heart to one day forgive me. I will always love you Sethy." I couldn't look at him; I was too angry and disappointed.

Stepping out into the hallway I had my first taste at freedom in a long time, but it was bittersweet. On one hand I got what I had been dreaming of since the night he brought me here, the opportunity to go back home, to my old life with my family. On the other hand I was losing what I had been dreaming of for a long time, somebody who loved me, for who I was, with all my virtues and defects.

Stopping every two steps I couldn't get my body to move away from the door. I could hear Jacob's muffled sobs, bitter and laced with pain. I didn't want to go back, I couldn't go back, he abused me, tried to rape me, kept me as a prisoner controlling everything about my life.

I had to make a decision and it would be final. If I decided to stay I was going to let down all my defenses, I was going to be whatever he wanted me to be. This scared the shit out of me, the idea of having sex with Jake was terrifying and exciting at the same time.

If I decided to leave I would probably finish high school and leave La Push forever. I would leave the pack and make a life for myself, trying to forget everything that happened in the last weeks.

It dawned on me what I needed to do; sure of my decision I took the first steps to the rest of my life.

**Here it is, in what direction do you think Seth is going? Back to Jake or away from him?**

**If you can, leave me a review and tell me what you think.**


	26. Chapter 26 The Soulless Monster

**I want to thank all the readers; the number of reviews was amazing; I could not believe it. I love you guys!**

**Disclaimer: I don't own any of the characters; everything related to Twilight belongs to Stephenie Meyer.**

Chapter 26 The soulless monster

Sure of my decision I walked towards the stairs, I needed to get out of there, I needed to get away from Jake. Noticing a bunch of wildflowers scattered all over the stairs I couldn't ignore the lump that formed on my throat. I felt a stabbing pain on my chest when the agony of hearing Jake's desperate sobs was more than I could handle. "Oh God, what did I do? I lost him, this can't be happening, I lost my Seth!" he kept chanting the same words over and over again.

I stumbled on my own two feet when I got to the bottom of the stairs. This was something uncommon for a shifter; it was like my own body was sabotaging my decision to leave this prison. I stopped on my tracks when Jake's muffled scream reached my ears, his despair coming out in agonized screams, they sounded muffled like he was screaming onto a pillow or the bed.

Looking up towards the door of our bedroom, wait …not our room, the condom room, I faltered in my decision to leave. Every instinct, every fiber and every cell of my body were commanding me to go upstairs and console him, my wolf's howling was a lament from inside my being, but I needed to be strong. If I had an ounce of dignity left in my body I needed to leave, even if it meant killing us, but I didn't care I, was already dead, dead inside, Jake's betrayal killed me.

I walked past Billy, who was sitting in the living room in silence. "Please Seth, don't leave him, I know we don't like each other, but Jake adores you and I haven't seen him so happy in such a long time. He is young and inexperienced, you both need to grow up a lot, but do it together, give him a chance." Billy's voice was piercing at my soul, injecting me with so much guilt that almost made me scream in frustration.

"No Billy, no more chances, Jake used all his get out of jail free cards, you should be happy, you are getting rid of me." Another scream made Billy flinch and I could feel my own two feet pushing me back towards Jake. I willed my body to do what I needed to do, I ran out through the back door, the same door through which Jake carried me almost two months before. Running towards the forest I stopped to take off my clothes, since I didn't have any string to tie them to my leg I placed then on the floor and shifted, picking them up with my teeth. The stabbing pain on my chest grew exponentially with every step I took, but I chose to ignore it. This was my time to choose, everybody had taken my choices away and now I was taking back my life.

I ran through the forest in an undetermined direction, I was free, but in no way or form happy. I thought that for sure the moment I left Jake's prison I would be ecstatic, doing cartwheels in my mind, but that was not the case; I was miserable. The pain I felt was so tremendous, it was like acid running through my veins, like somebody was stabbing me, shredding my heart with every passing second. The strangest thing was to realize I couldn't feel any emotion; there was no sadness, no anger, no happiness, no joy and no hope, just pain and the unrelenting howling of my wolf.

"Seth, Seth is that you? I don't sense Jake's thoughts, are you by yourself?" It was Leah's voice in my head; I sensed she was both worried and happy.

"Yes Leah, it's me, I left Jacob, I'm done with all his shit." Sharing with her my decision made it real for me, I left my best friend, I left my Jacob.

"Whoa Seth, hold on, what do you mean you left him? Does he know?" She sounded panicky, I knew she was worried about my safety; it was a well-known fact that if I ever left Jake, he would hunt me down and make me submit right then and there.

"Yes Leah he knows; don't worry about me. Please don't follow me either, tell Sam I have to go away for a little while to clear my head, but I'll be back." I needed to leave La Push for at least a few days, my mind was a jumble of ideas and memories that were making it very hard for me to think clearly. If I stayed, everybody would be giving me their opinions and/or ideas about what I needed to do and I was not in the mood to take any shit from anybody. I was the only one who knew what I went through the last two months, all the good and bad experiences, all the hate and all the love.

Running through the forest my big paws were hitting the moist forest floor in a rhythmic pattern, the thudding of my heartbeat loud in my head. I had a mission, to escape from the cause of the crippling pain that was destroying me, to escape from the memories, to escape from my own thoughts. I couldn't cry; it was not that I didn't want to, quite the opposite, I wanted to, even if it was just to calm the pain of the separation, but my eyes felt dry and incapable of shedding one tear.

When the ever changing moon replaced the blazing sun in the sky; the brightly lit moon illuminated my path in the oddly silent and dark forest. Many people consider the moon romantic; not me, I see it as unobtainable, just like happiness is. I watched the trees whirl past me one after the other. I was free, there was nobody telling me not to run, nobody to give me orders, this was what I wanted.

Out of pure exhaustion I stopped running, seeking refuge in a space under a fallen tree. I tried to sleep but sleep wouldn't welcome me. I wasn't even hungry, I remembered being hungry before this new nightmare started but not anymore. New nightmare? No, I should say old nightmare since it had been going on for almost five months, but no, this was new. The sense of betrayal and disloyalty were a heavy burden on my shoulders. After everything I experienced with Jake this was all new.

The last two weeks had been the best of my life with only one dark cloud in my bright blue sky. I felt like a prisoner. Nobody's life was perfect but I wanted more I wanted to have my cake and to eat it too.

The first rays of the sun hit me, waking me up in the process; it took me forever to fall asleep and I still felt very tired. I would've thought I was home with Jake if it wasn't for the crushing pain in my chest telling me otherwise. Immediately I was bombarded by the voices of my family.

"Seth, are you ok?" Sam told the others to shut-up so he could talk to me.

"Yes Sam, I'm fine, just needed to get away."

"Where are you?" This time it was Leah's voice.

"To tell you the truth I really don't know, I just ran until I was too tired to keep going." I felt guilty at the notion that everybody was so worried that they were in wolf form so early in the morning. Among them I could feel anger, worry and sadness but the most prevalent wasn't an emotion, there was an underlying pain among them that was so intense it could easily match mine.

"Seth, we're worried about you, come back." This time it was Quil's voice.

"I will, but not yet, I need to think without all of you trying to influence me. Sam is everything ok? Who else is phased?"

"It's just Leah, Paul, Quil and me, why?"

"Nothing important I just felt something weird." I was probably being paranoid.

"What do you mean by something weird? Seth, be careful, remember the leeches smell different to you." Now Sam was being paranoid; he not only seemed worried, but also distracted.

"Not something weird here, there with you guys, but it's probably nothing. Don't worry about me I'm going to hunt something to eat and then I'll be human for the rest of the day. I don't mean to be rude but I don't want anybody in my head and please don't contact me."

Jacob POV

At least now I knew he was safe. I was grateful that nobody told Seth I was listening in on their conversation. When Sam came to my house to ask me what the hell I did to Seth, I would have been pissed if I could feel anything. Since the moment Seth left the house the pain in my soul had grown to an overwhelming magnitude, but now I couldn't even cry anymore, maybe this was my punishment, to feel an immeasurable amount of pain without any outlet to alleviate it.

I panicked when Sam informed me that Seth didn't go home as I thought he did, that instead he took off running away from La Push and Leah knew but didn't tell him until this morning, explaining she needed to give Seth a head start before I went after him. I would've been so fucking angry at Leah, my Seth had been only God knows where all night and she didn't say anything. I was already running outside to phase and go after him, knowing that if I followed the pull of the imprint I could find him easily, when Sam stopped me.

"Jake, he left you; do you think he wants you to go after him?"

"I know he doesn't want anything to do with me, but I need to keep him safe. Come with me, I'll show you where to find him and then I'll disappear."

"Disappear where Jake? Don't you think he will catch your scent on me?"

"I don't fucking care Sam! I need to know he is safe, that's all." I was losing my patience fast, when it came to my Seth I had no control and that was probably the cause of my demise.

"Jake, there is another way, let's go to the woods behind your house, the others are back there, we'll try to contact him. If he doesn't answer we'll go looking for him, but I still need to know what the hell happened."

"When we phase I'll show you everything."

In the woods behind my house we joined Leah, Paul and Quil, they were already in their wolf forms waiting for us. Sam and I shifted and soon their thoughts joined ours.

"I think he is asleep, I remember when Jake lived in wolf form we could see his dreams the same way we can see Seth's right now." Reaching out to him I could see many distorted images where nothing made sense. I never knew we could see each other's dreams I guess it's not too often we sleep as wolves.

"Ok, at least we know he is ok. Now Jake, do you care to tell us what happened?" I wasn't too thrilled with the fact that Quil and Paul where going to see what happened, but sooner or later they would. Hesitantly I recalled all the memories of what happened yesterday for my pack mates to see. From the moment I came back into the house just to find our room empty and Seth nowhere to be found, all the fear and raw rage I felt at that moment making them flinch. Our encounter on the path coming from Sam's house, where I stupidly threatened him again, now with a cold head I could see the fear in his eyes, but there was something else behind those beautiful eyes; it was the pain of betrayal. I wouldn't show them what happened next, I couldn't allow Quil and Paul to see Seth's body, especially at a moment when he was so vulnerable. I made a mental narrative of what happened next, of the painful conversation that ended up with him leaving my side forever.

"You're such an idiot! You were so close; you should've heard the way he spoke of you yesterday. He trusted you, he was happy; he told me he felt so close to you, that he knew you loved him. You had to go and betray him and for what? To fuck him? Damn it, Jake when I asked him if he was in love with you he denied it, but I know him and he was lying." Leah's words were rubbing salt in the open wound where my heart used to be, my Seth trusted me, he felt I loved him and I betrayed him, I lost control and destroyed our future.

"Leah, that's enough!" Sam as my beta had a more direct connection with me and my pain was more evident to him than to any other member of the pack.

"Sam, let her; she is right, I'm an idiot, I don't deserve Seth."

"Guys, I think he is awake, he is looking around." Paul was right, I could see through his eyes that he was indeed in a forest, but it was unfamiliar to us.

I cleared my mind and blocked my thoughts from him, something that was extremely hard because of our bond and his position in the pack. I listened to his exchange with my pack mates and breathed a sigh of relief when I heard he was fine. Paul and Quil left to go rest and I stayed with Leah and Sam, who just sat silently beside me. I didn't want to shift until he did, at least this way I felt a little closer to him. I sat on the forest floor and watched through his eyes as he hunted a rabbit and ate it raw, he didn't like the taste too much but decided not to be picky. After eating he shifted to human form and our connection was broken. I whimpered feeling all alone again, not that he knew he was indirectly keeping me company, but to a starving dog crumbs are a feast.

"Thank you for keeping me company, I know you didn't do it for me, but I am thankful. I'm going back home, dad must be wondering about me"

"Jake, are you going to be ok?" Sam was genuinely concerned.

"No but that's not important, I blew it Sam, I had happiness within my reach and fucked up letting it slip between my fingers"

"You know what's odd? You look so calm; it's like you don't care about what happened and to tell you the truth, it's pissing me off. Jake, did you care about my brother at all?" I could tell Sam was getting angrier by the minute.

"Sam, I adore your brother, he means more to me than my own life, I have no idea how I'll be able to go on without him. Since he left the house I haven't been able to feel anything but pain, it hurts so much, but I'm incapable of feeling any emotions. Maybe this is what they meant when the legends explained that when an imprint is broken the shifter dies, maybe they meant he dies metaphorically. My soul is dead I've turned into the tin man from Wizard of Oz, I have no heart." I stopped to take a breath and saw Sam and Leah looking at me in disbelief.

"I'm going home, please just let me know he is ok, I don't want to shift again and risk him seeing my thoughts, and I'm not in a good place right now."

I walked slowly towards the house, now there was nobody there waiting for me, no arms to hug me and no lips to kiss me, there was no rush to get there anymore. I missed everything about him, his angelic face when I kissed him goodbye in the mornings, the way he would blush whenever I touched him, his laugh that more than once infused me with energy after an exhausting day, his addictive chocolate scent, how he looked at me lovingly while he kissed me whenever I came back to him. The worst thing was to know that I was never going experience any of it anymore, I lost him and it was all my fault.

Walking inside, I found my father sitting in the kitchen; he looked at me with regret and pity in his eyes.

"I'm sorry son, it's all my fault, if I didn't tell Seth to go get the food, none of this would've happened, but I swear I didn't do it on purpose, there was no way for me to know it would end this way." Now I understood why his eyes were so full of regret, he felt responsible for what happened, for sending Seth on an errand that would cost me my future.

"I know dad, it's not your fault, the only guilty party here it's me. I behaved like a crazed maniac and didn't stop for one minute to think about the consequences of my actions. I had my wolf under control, but a second of weakness unleashed the beast inside me." I kneeled beside my father placing my head on his lap; he ran his callous hands over my hair trying to comfort me.

"Dad, it hurts so much! It's unbearable; I won't be able to endure it much longer."

"Son, then go get him, talk to him without threats, he has feelings for you, he will listen."

"I can't, he went away from La Push for a while, when he comes back I'll try to talk to him one last time." Dad caught on my play on words and questioned me.

"What do you mean by one last time?" Billy's concern was evident in the tone of his voice.

I lifted my head to look at my father. "Dad, I can't live without him." My voice was only a whisper, but my dad understood and held me tight to his chest while crying.

I stood up leaving my father by himself in the kitchen. It was horrible that I couldn't even feel bad for hurting him. Walking upstairs I daydreamt that Seth was in our room waiting for me, that I never lost control and he was sitting on our bed watching television. But it was only a dream, the room was empty, the television was off and I was all alone.

I stood beside the bed I hoped for so long to share with him, the bed where we would sit and talk for hours, the bed where he would allow me to give him massages where I touched every inch of his body, the bed where I dreamt he would give himself to me. Not wanting to contaminate the bed with my scent, I walked around it and sat on the floor with my back against it, looking out the window thinking of my Seth.

Seth POV

After eating my breakfast which was awful to say the least, I shifted and got dressed. Walking now as a human I could see the forest getting thinner and thought that I must be getting close to the edge of at least this part of the forest. I didn't even know where I was but it didn't matter, I just needed to be far. The forest ended up connecting to a park that seemed to be deserted, finding a bench I sat on it, it was very cloudy and the possibility of rain probably deterred most people from visiting that park. One thing was for sure, I was not on Forks or even Port Los Angeles, this place was completely unfamiliar to me.

So many memories came to my mind, the first time I phased, the excitement of his heartbeat and the panicky sound of his voice when he thought I was in pain. The first time I saw his vulnerable side, the night I consoled him and ended up spending the night next to him. The hours we spent talking, with him mainly listening to every stupid thing I had to say. The showers, the massages, the flowers, how he was willing to make a fool of himself to earn my trust. But especially the night on the cliffs when I recognized all the beauty he possessed inside and out.

There had been many bumps on the road; the night of my birthday being the biggest one, but one truth remained unquestionable, he loved me with all his heart, his mind and his soul.

I stayed in the same spot and in the same position all day, even when it started pouring I didn't move, I didn't have the desire or the need to go anywhere, if anybody saw me they could've thought I was a statue. In a way I was a statue, I was the hollow form of who Seth Clearwater used to be. I was so empty, all I had to remind me I was alive was the pain in my chest that proved itself to be enough to make me lose my breath more than once. As the dark day led the way for the even darker night I realized I had been sitting on the same bench for hours, I wasn't hungry especially for forest creatures, eating raw was something that certainly took some getting used to.

Walking back into the forest I felt the leaves of the old trees rattle in the soft summer breeze. I phased and tried to sleep but sleep wouldn't find me, I've always been able to sleep on command but maybe this was the way it would be from now on, no appetite, no sleep and no feelings. Maybe I was dead and didn't notice; maybe in his rage Jake killed me, but no I wasn't that lucky. I was grateful that my family respected my wishes and didn't contact me. I couldn't help but wonder how Jake was doing, was he as miserable as I was?

The next day brought me to the same bench where I sat the day before; again my thoughts brought me back to a certain wolf. Pushing the memories of Jake aside I focused on my future, I had two more years of high school, then college. I wanted to be the first one of my family to graduate from college. I always liked school and my mother was certain I would be the first Clearwater to graduate. Unfortunately every thought about my future brought me back to Jake; I missed him more than I wanted to admit. Today he was going to give me my first driving lesson; I was looking forward to it, but especially because it meant we were going to spend the whole day together. Because of his busy schedule it was almost impossible to spend a whole day together and I knew we cherished those rare occasions.

He was my friend and confidant, Jake knew me better than anybody and never judged me. He was not perfect, but neither was I. He was possessive and overprotective, I was narrow-minded and stubborn. He was a fucking pervert that only saw me as a sex object, wait, that was not true; he loved me more than I could ever love him. I needed to get off my fucking high horse and open my eyes to the future he had been offering me. But I wouldn't, I made my decision, my life was going to be so much better without Jake in it, wasn't it?

A police siren at a distance alerted me out of my musings and looking up at the starry sky I tried to guess the time but was unable to. The last time I looked at the stars had been the night we went on our second date, when we sat by the cliffs. That was the night I saw him at a different light, the night I realized I had fallen in….. no, that didn't happen. I needed to move on, he betrayed me.

I walked back to my usual spot on the forest and phased into the sandy wolf. This time nobody respected my silence.

"Seth what the hell? Do you have any idea what time it is? We were worried sick." Sam's voice was blasting in my head, shit, it must be really late.

"Sorry Sam, I lost track of time, by the way what time is it?"

"It's almost midnight, what were you doing all this time?"

"Just thinking."

"Please don't scare us like that again, have you been eating?"

"Yes I have, don't worry about me Sam" I lied for my brother's benefit I didn't feel hungry so I didn't eat, it was my choice. After all this time being unable to make any decisions, it was good to have control over what I did.

"Seth, I'm your brother; of course I worry about you."

"I'm going to sleep Sam, bye." I didn't feel like prolonging our exchange more than it was necessary.

The next morning I woke up hungry which was good, at least it gave me a sense of normalcy. I cringed at the idea of eating a raw animal again, but I had no choice, I guessed it was rabbit for breakfast. After scarfing down the small animal I buried the carcass and phased to human.

It had been raining for three days in a row, I must be somewhere in Washington or Seattle, this was good because it kept the park deserted and I could sit and think all day without anybody bothering me. Just like the last two days, my thoughts brought me to Jake, how he had been busting his ass trying to change, yes, he slipped a few times but he always remained in control, never hurting me again. Quite the contrary he would hurt himself punching trees just to avoid doing something he would regret. I couldn't help thinking, that if his father hadn't stopped him, Jake would've raped me. But In my heart I knew he wouldn't hurt me, he would've stopped, Jake had been working really hard to earn my trust and my love. I, on the other hand, had done nothing except take everything he had given me like I was entitled to it, like I deserved it. He gave me a home and I hated it, he gave me his company and I rejected it, he gave me his heart and I destroyed it.

No wonder his wolf went crazy, the pain of my constant rejection making it unstable. Since I left Jake I've felt the wrath of my wolf gnawing in my insides like the hungry beast it was. Only now I experience what he had been suffering for five long months, the agony, the unrelenting howling, the demands, it was too much for a human being to remain sane. And I knew that my wolf was not as vicious as Jake's and she was hurting me, I could only imagine what Jake had been going through.

As the sad rainy day disappeared to allow the dark to take over I decided to go back to the forest but this time instead of going to sleep under the fallen log I kept going, running back to La Push, running back home.

I arrived at La Push late at night and walked home, towards Sam's house. Stopping to retrieve the key Sam always hid under a pot I went in quietly. I could hear Sam's snores and Emily's and Leah's deep quiet breathing. Walking upstairs to my room I could feel the old familiarity of the house where I've spent the last three years of my life. My room looked almost the same way it did the night Jacob kidnapped me, the bed was very inviting especially after sleeping on the floor for the last three nights. I laid down on my bed trying to sleep but my body had a different idea, looking at the ceiling I just waited until the first rays of the morning sun came through my window.

"Saaam Seth's back!" It was Leah's excited voice blasting from the hallway.

"Welcome back squirt! When did you get here?" She jumped on the bed on top of me, she probably hoped to wake me up but she was out of luck, I hadn't been able to sleep at all last night, maybe I was too excited about getting back home.

"Hi Leah, I got here late last night." I sat up on the bed and Leah sat next to me, looking at me inquisitively.

"Seth ,you look like crap!" Of course I had to look like crap, let's see what happened in the last few days. I was almost raped for the third time by a demented wolf, I had been living in the forest for the last three days, sleeping on the floor and eating rabbits, yeah I thought I had all the right in the world to look like crap.

"Thank you loving sister, as you may know, the last few days have not been easy."

"Seth, thank goodness you're back, we've been worried sick" this time it was Sam who came in the room followed by a sleepy looking Emily.

"I'm fine guys, don't worry so much." I was not fooling anybody, not even myself.

"Seth, sweetie, we've missed you so much, the house has not been the same without you." Emily always had a way to make me feel wanted and welcomed.

"Thanks Emily, well I'm back and I'm not going anywhere" The three of them exchanged looks, but wouldn't dare say anything.

"I'm going to make breakfast, after three days of eating forest critters you must be ready for a home cooked meal." That was something she was absolutely right about, I wasn't hungry, but maybe all I needed was a nice warm meal to open my appetite.

"I would like to take a shower before breakfast if that's ok."

"Sure, we'll be downstairs." Sam helped Emily get up and they walked out of the bedroom holding hands. Watching this simple gesture I felt my chest get tight, how many times Jake and I held hands while walking around, he always held my hand interlacing our fingers whenever we were close. Leah gave me a look of pity before walking out behind Sam and Emily.

My closet and drawers were almost empty; Jake probably hadn't returned my clothes yet. Grabbing a pair of old sweatpants and a t-shirt I walked to the bathroom. I got in the shower thinking that there will be no strong hands washing my hair or scrubbing my back, there will be nobody to touch me in the most intimate way possible; that was part of my past.

After getting dressed I went downstairs where the aroma of scrambled eggs, bacon and toast greeted me. Sam was trying to help Emily but he was proving himself to be more of a hindrance than any help, in the past I would've found it hilarious, but right now I couldn't. Emily placed a heaping plate of food in front of me, I started eating but food didn't taste that good when you didn't have an appetite. After eating about half the eggs and two strips of bacon I stood up to rinse my plate.

"Seth are you ok? You barely ate." Emily's voice was laced with concern for my lack of appetite.

"I'm fine Em, just haven't had much of an appetite lately."

"So what are your plans for today?" At least Leah was trying to diffuse the potentially depressing moment.

"I'll probably go to the beach, I haven't been to the beach all summer and I miss it. By the way Sam, after work today, do you think you can go by the Black's and get my clothes? I have nothing to wear." Again all three of them exchanged looks that were a mixture of worry, sadness and confusion.

"Sure Seth." Sam's answer was very curt to say the least.

The walk on the beach was as unexciting as the rest of my existence; walking barefoot on the sand I could feel the cool damp sand sticking to my feet, by the water the sand felt even colder but silky. I stood on one spot by the water, feeling as the waves washed over my feet and as they receded they took the sand away from under my feet, making my footprints to be etched in the sand for a few seconds.

With the mid-morning sun blocked by the almost constant cloud cover, I sat on the sand looking at the different shades of gray in the sky. I admired the ocean as a shimmering expanse of endless motion, with its constant coming and going bringing shattered shells from faraway places. All this beauty and grandiosity made more evident my pain and loneliness. Just two weeks ago the wonders of nature had the complete opposite effect on me, complimenting me, instead of making more evident my faults, but that was a different time, it was a time of hope and love.

I wondered how Jake was doing; did he know I was back? If he did, how come he hadn't shown up? I had so many questions and nobody to answer them. Bored of the empty beach I headed back home; at least Emily was there and I would have somebody to talk to.

"Hi Seth, I was starting to worry, you were gone all day, did you have fun?" I hadn't even noticed how much time had passed.

"I guess Emily; if I tell you something do you promise not to tell Sam or Leah, I don't want them to freak out."

"Sure Seth, what is it?" Emily pulled a chair and sat next to me.

"I can't feel any emotions Emily, there is this enormous pain in my chest but I have no feelings or emotions associated with it. It's really strange, in a way I feel like I'm dead inside and the pain is just my insides rotting away." Emily nodded in understanding while holding my hands in a comforting matter.

"I don't have any idea why you can't feel anything Seth, I need to think about it, but I have a hunch that it is because of Jake." I didn't want anybody to even say his name but I wouldn't say anything, not to Emily. At that moment Sam came in the house carrying a bag with what I could only guess were my clothes.

"Here Seth, this was what I could find, in a few days I'll go back for the rest." I was confused at why he had to look for the clothes himself.

"Thanks Sam, this will do for now, by the way… how is he? Is Jake ok?" I shouldn't care but I did.

"He is fine Seth, better than we all expected." Well good for him, the fucker was fine and dandy without me. Why the hell was I so miserable while he was fine?

I went upstairs and began taking my clothes out of the bag and that's when it hit me, his scent was all over the clothes. They were carefully folded and each one of them was impregnated with the scent I loved the most in the world, moss and wildflowers, the scent of my Jake. I sat on the bed hugging some of the clothes to my chest while I inhaled the aroma that was making me yearn for his company and for his touch. God I missed him! The pain in my chest made me bend over in agony at this admission and I had to bite down on the clothes I was holding to prevent me from screaming.

Dinner had no appeal to me so I decided to stay in my room, locked in my room I couldn't make myself put away my clothes and risk dissipating the wonderful scent that right now was the only thing making my life tolerable.

The days passed one after the other, long and slow, life was passing me by and I was barely existing, not living. It had been two weeks since I walked out of Jake's house, the place I considered my home. I spent most of my days sitting in silence, random thoughts invading my mind, so many disturbing thoughts that I refused to accept. Closing my eyes I tried to block all the images that bombarded into my head, memories of friendship, memories of companionship, memories of love. I was torn between the life I lived until a couple of weeks ago, the life I was living right now and the life I could live if I learned to forgive and forget.

Unable to sleep I sat in the dark thinking of Jake, I felt I was his prisoner but right now when I was free to come and go as I pleased, I felt more isolated than ever. What I really wanted was to feel warm arms surround me, holding me tight against a warm body. Have his lips graze across my neck and nibble on my lips before claiming them in a heated kiss.

Making myself get out of bed I jumped in the shower, after toweling myself dry, I used the towel to clean the moisture from the mirror. Looking at the person staring back at me I barely recognized myself, my hair was longer and wilder, my skin looked dull and the dark circles around my eyes made me look like a fucking raccoon.

After foregoing breakfast I went for a run around La Push, I tried to avoid running by Jake's house but every step took me closer to his house. After a few rounds around the reservation I found myself behind his house, trying to catch a glimpse of Jake. How pathetic was I? This was ridiculous, he didn't care about me, he was happier without me pestering him. Frustrated with my own stupidity I decided to go back home and locked myself in my bedroom.

"Seth, its Emily. Can I come in?"

"Sure Em." Emily came in carrying a plate of chocolate chip cookies and a glass of milk.

"Seth you are barely eating so I baked you some cookies to see if I can get your spirits up."

"I'm fine Emily; you and Sam worry too much."

"Don't give me that bullcrap Seth, maybe Sam buys it but I don't. You don't eat, you don't sleep, have you taken a good look at yourself? Sam says the circles around your eyes are so prominent you are starting to look like a leech. Seth I'm afraid, if you continue like this we are going to lose you, you are going to die." Emily sat down next to me, her eyes glistening with the tears she was unsuccessfully trying to hold.

"Can I have the cookies? They smell good." I needed to change the subject fast. Emily gave me the plate of cookies and taking one I bit into it. I remembered the day Jake tried to bake cookies for me. He misread the recipe and used too much flour and we ended up with cookies that had the consistency of a rock. We went to the backyard and took turns throwing them to different targets around the property. We laughed our heads off watching them hit cans and bottles like they were real rocks, they did not even break most of the time.

"Seth, you don't like them?"

"It's not that, I remembered the day Jake tried to bake cookies for me, they were so bad we ended up using them for target practice and from then on he always bought them at the store."

"Seth do you realize that just now, telling me about the cookies was the most alive I've seen you since you came back?"

"Emily I'm just going through some though shit, it's a lot you know, I need to learn to live again."

"That's just it Seth you are never going to be happy because you lost your soul. You had all the right to leave Jake, but everything has a price and you are paying it now. I've been thinking about why you can't feel any emotion, I came up to the conclusion that you lost part of your soul, it died the day you left him, that's why you're unable to feel anything but pain. Your pain is a physical manifestation, but any feelings associated to it would be emotional and you lack those. And another thing" she paused unsure if she should continue talking or not.

"To hell with it! I'm not a wolf I don't have to obey his orders. Jake is not well, he is in even worse shape than you; he ordered Sam and the others to tell you he was fine but he is a mess, you both are. And if you don't do something about it you will regret it for the rest of your life, which by the looks of it won't be too long. Neither one of you will live much longer."

Emily's words hit me like a ton of bricks, Jake missed me! I knew it all along, but my anger and my pride prevented me from accepting this fact. I had to admit that the days since I left his house had been the worse of my entire life. The only time I could recall feeling so much pain was when my parents died. At least when they left me, I had the comfort of my tears, at least I could feel emotion and cry. Now I didn't even have that, maybe Emily was right, when I left my soul mate; my soul had no more reason for existing and died.

"Emily please tell Sam I went to see Jake." Emily and I melted in a hug that provided me both with comfort and strength.

The house was quiet, Billy was not home and I wasn't even sure if Jake was home. Walking up the stairs I heard the faint beating of the heart I knew so well, the heart that beats only for me. Opening the door the sight before me was heart wrenching, Jake was sitting on the floor, his cheeks were sunken and he had dark circles around his eyes. He looked so different, I've never seen him with facial hair before, sometimes he would get one or two day's growth when he was too tired to shave, but never more than that. His hair was greasy and he looked like he hadn't changed his clothes in the last two weeks.

Walking towards him slowly, I sat down next to him; I was surprised he hadn't noticed me or acknowledged my presence in the room. He turned his head and looked at me with a dreamy look in his sad eyes.

"I must really be losing my mind, now I can even see you next to me, my angel." His voice was a monotone, no inflection, no emotion.

"Jake I'm really here, we need to talk." I motioned to place my hand on his cheek but he surprised me by moving away.

"No, I want to keep seeing you, if I don't feel your touch I'll now this is a hallucination." He sounded scared, but his eyes were as devoid of emotion as mine.

I moved towards him and placed my hand on his warm cheek, he leaned against my touch with a total look of disbelief etched on his face.

"Seth you are really here? I'm not imagining you?"

"Yes, I am here, Jake."

"Oh Seth I'm so sorry!" Jake threw himself towards me, ending with his face on my lap and his arms snaked around my waist.

"I'm so sorry Seth, please forgive me, I swear it's never going to happen again, please give me another chance." His apology was sincere and laced with pain.

"I know you're sorry and I'm sorry too Jacob." I said in a small voice.

He straightened up looking at me like he still couldn't believe I was there. Grabbing my hands he kissed them repeatedly, taking turns between kissing them and rubbing them on his face.

"Seth don't you dare apologize, you have done nothing wrong, me on the other hand, have been a possessive, overbearing bastard."

I clasped my hand over his mouth not allowing him to continue, he was not the only one responsible. At least the few times he lost control he had the somewhat valid excuse of his wolf, I had no excuse for my behavior other than being a cold hearted son of a bitch.

"Don't you dare take all the responsibility for yourself. You have to hold me accountable to my fuck-ups Jake."

"What fuck-ups baby? You have never done anything worth of all the stress and abuse I inflicted on you, because of my threats you broke, your sanity briefly disappearing as your mind went on a deadly spiral." He placed one of his arms around my waist with his hand on my back, he tried to pull me towards him but I resisted. In the past he would've been angry with me for rejecting him, but at least this time his only reaction was to loosen his hold.

"None of that Jake, we need to talk, so far we've been doing everything according to your rules. Now it's my turn, I'll set the rules of the game, I understand about dominant/submissive dynamics but we're more than that. We're soul-mates and you have to respect me the same way I respect you. I'm willing to give us a chance, I'm willing to change, but you have to change too. If you don't cooperate I swear I will walk out that door and leave your sorry ass once and for all."

* * *

><p><strong>This conversation is not over, it will continue in the next chapter.<strong>

**I want to thank FallenAngelOfAustralia and Maidenrose for your support, going as far as offering to help me write this difficult chapter.**

**I hope the chapter was not disappointing, review and let me know your thoughts, I love to hear from you.**


	27. Chapter 27 Pride

**Thank you to all the readers that follow the story week to week. Especially to those of you who review, a great big hug, I love you all.**

**Disclaimer: I do not own Twilight or any of its characters.**

* * *

><p>Chapter 27 Pride<p>

"Jake, I want us to be equals, I'm aware that you consider me your submissive and that will never change, but it does not mean you can abuse me. You'll respect me, no more threats, I'm sick and tired of hearing you say what you are going to do to me if I don't comply with whatever you want. If we ever have sex it will be when I'm good and ready. When I tell you, _Jake I'm ready_, that's when it will happen, not a minute before." Jake only nodded affirmatively as his answer.

"Jake, what am I to you?" I needed to hear his answer to reaffirm my decision to come and live with him as his mate. He took a minute to gather his thoughts before answering.

"Seth, you are the sun that brings warmth and light to my life, the beat of my heart that keeps me alive, you are my forever love. You are my best friend, my soul mate, my passion, my companion, my life and my everything." I couldn't take my eyes off his beautiful face; it was like I was looking at him for the first time ever. His voice was slightly above a whisper, the sweet sound washed over my spirit filling it with joy. Each and every word that came out of his mouth embedded itself in my very soul. I couldn't contain the ocean of emotions that his declaration stirred inside me; kneeling in front of him I placed my arms around his neck and hugged him, never wanting to let go.

I had a lot more I needed to say; gathering my strength I peeled myself away from him sitting back on my legs. He whimpered at the loss of the warmth of my body, but this was important, it was a turning point in our lives as individuals and as a couple.

"Jake, if I'm all that, for goodness sake don't treat me like a fucking pet, I may transform into a dog but that doesn't mean I am one, the way you sometimes treat me is humiliating and demeaning. To make things worse you keep me in such a short leash that most of the time I feel like I'm suffocating, it's not fair."

"Another thing, no more alpha commands, you abuse your alpha voice. It's a privilege and a necessity when it comes to commanding the pack to have an imposing voice that will get the job done, but you have been using it to keep me here as your prisoner and to kidnap me the night of my birthday. You soil that honor by using it the way you have been handling it." Jake seemed like he needed to say something, I stopped to give him a chance.

"Seth, I'm sorry, I never realized how wrong my actions were. I'll never use an alpha command to manipulate you or anybody else. But I will use it if it's necessary, to keep you safe and to manage the pack." Jake was being reasonable, this was new and surprising. This conversation should've taken place a long time ago, but back then it was not possible, we both needed a good slap on the butt to get us into shape.

"Fair enough, that brings us to your definition of safe and my definition of safe. Jake I'm a fucking wolf, if I get hurt I'll heal as quickly as you do. Your definition of safe was linked to your fear of losing me and that only brought us a lot of grief. If you would've given me the freedom to visit my family, none of this mess would've happened." He had to be made aware that his stubbornness and intransigence played a big part in all the physical and emotional pain we went through the past two weeks.

"Seth that's not completely accurate, in a way my protective tendencies had to do with my fear of losing you, but the need to protect our mate is inherent to us wolves. You don't feel it as strongly because you are a submissive and never been in the position to fear for my life. I'm painfully aware that you don't care if I live or die, hopefully that will change and when it does, you'll understand how strong the need to protect is." Until probably a month ago it wouldn't have made a difference if he fell from the face of the earth, it was a horrible thought, but it was true and I had to admit it. Sadly, he didn't know how much that had changed, but I knew that very soon he would find out for himself how much I cared for him.

"School will start soon and I'm planning to go back, I want to finish high school and you should go back too. You only have one year left and will graduate, man you're going to miss your senior year?" In one of our conversation he revealed his plans not to finish high school, I was totally against it, but he wouldn't hear it.

"Seth, I have other priorities right now, well one priority and several responsibilities. I need to work to provide for you, I quit my job the day after you left, I'll try to get it back and if he already hired somebody I can find work somewhere else." I felt terrible because I was his only priority, when to me, he was one of several.

"Jake, I don't want you making sacrifices for me." He didn't let me finish "Seth, baby, it's never a sacrifice when you do it for the one you love." I heard him say he loved me many times before, but at that moment it had a special meaning, our bond was cemented on the fact that he was in love with me, not on the imprint. I brought our intertwined fingers to my lips and kissed his hands. He tilted his head to one side looking almost like a lost puppy, hungry for affection and with an immense amount of love to give.

I had not realized how much I learned from him, without knowing it he taught me how to show emotion, how to make your mate feel loved and needed. Jake showed me what it meant to give your heart to another person, to overlook their downfalls and see them beautiful and perfect in your eyes. He taught me that when you love a person there was no reason to be embarrassed to express your feelings or your needs.

"I'm ready to accept my part of the responsibility for what happened two weeks ago. Jake, I never gave us a chance, since the moment I phased and saw in your thoughts that you imprinted on me, I rejected you. Instead of helping you appease your wolf, I provoked it with my behavior. You have given me everything and I acted like an ungrateful, spoiled, brat."

"Don't say that Seth, you're wonderful, sometimes very stubborn, but when you act according to who you really are, you are the most loving, giving man, any person could wish to have in their life. I'm so lucky to be sharing this adventure we call life with an amazing individual. I know these past months have been hell for you and for that I'm very sorry, but to me anytime you smile, laugh, kiss or touch me, I feel like the most fortunate person to walk the face of the earth."

How could I have been so blind? I had a committed, understanding, wonderful and loving mate and I tossed a black shroud over him and ignored his existence, just riding the wave until I had a chance to leave this prison.

"Jake, I want my freedom." at this statement I saw his face fall and a slight tremor emanated from his body. "Don't jump to conclusions Jake, I want my freedom, but I don't want to stay away. Can we reach a compromise?"

"What kind of compromise Seth?" For the first time since I came in the room I saw a different light in his eyes, he had hope.

"In addition to what I already stipulated, I want my clothes, my phone, my computer and the freedom to come and go as I please." at this last part I felt Jacob stiffen.

"Seth you can have everything except the last one, I cannot allow you to come and go as you please. You have to understand, you are my submissive you cannot be by yourself, especially when there are other males present."

"Jake, I loathe that fucking word!" I was starting to feel aggravated.

"Submissive? Why? It's what you are, something that I'll be eternally thankful for, because if you were not, I wouldn't have imprinted on you and would miss sharing my life with the most beautiful soul ever created." I blushed furiously at this declaration; I really didn't deserve the unconditional love he had for me, going as far, as turning a blind eye on my many flaws.

"Jake, you need to trust me, I'll always respect our bond and regardless of where I go, be assured that I'll always come back to you." Smiling at him I grabbed his face with both my hands and placed a gentle kiss on his lips as a seal of my part of this pact.

He rubbed his cheek against me in true wolf matter, slowly he pulled back to look directly into my eyes.

"I trust you Seth, but the need to protect is too strong." He was sincere, no sign of arrogance or aggressiveness, I knew he had good intentions but as his father told me the day we left, we both needed to grow up.

"Ok, a compromise, I will not leave La Push under any circumstance unless you are with me. But, inside La Push I can go anywhere I want." I was exercising my recently found flexibility muscle.

"I agree... well maybe." I looked at him through narrowed eyes; he just gave me that annoyingly sexy smirk.

"Please Seth try to understand, I'm going against my own nature, it's going to be hard and I'll mess up, maybe more than once, but please never leave me."

"I'm not planning to go anywhere; you're stuck with me forever." The sweet sound of Jacob's laughter resonated through the whole house. He stood up pulling me towards him in a tight hug; he threw himself back on the bed taking me with him. This was a new beginning for us, not everyday people get a second chance and today we were both getting our second chance at happiness and at least I was not planning on wasting it.

Jake sat on the bed and pulled me towards him until I was sitting on his lap. "Seth can I… kiss you?" I nodded in affirmation and he gave me a sweet kiss on the lips, his kiss made me tremble with the power that it contained. I leaned against his chest feeling protected and unconditionally loved.

"Jake I'm so tired; I haven't been sleeping at all, what about you?"

"Me neither baby, I don't even remember the last time I slept through the night."

"I'm feeling sleepy for the first time in a while, we should go to sleep but first you need to do something." I was indeed very tired, but unlike the previous nights I felt my eyelids getting heavier with each passing minute.

"Anything baby, what is it?" I knew he couldn't deny me anything no matter how stupid or serious it was.

"Go shower, you stink!" We laughed together and I realized that I was happy, I was feeling emotion! I was not one hundred percent back to normal but it was something. It felt so amazing to be able to laugh again, but it was nothing compared to hearing Jake's laughter and to see his smile.

"Promise me you'll be here when I get out of the shower." Jake looked pleadingly at me.

"No, I won't promise, you'll have to trust me." I smiled and winked at him before he stood up and hesitantly walked towards the door.

I sat up on the bed feeling complete once again, the pain in my chest completely gone. I was tired and hungry but incredibly happy; there was no doubt in my mind I made the right decision. I was confident that with our new attitude we were going to make it work. Looking around at the blue room that had been my prison for two months I made a mental recollection of everything that had happened. So many emotions and feelings attacked me all at once that I couldn't help but close my eyes and allow the few tears that had pooled in my eyes to slide down my cheeks. This was a new beginning, gone were the days of struggle and uncertainty.

When Jake came back to the room wearing a pair of boxers, I was already under the covers also wearing my boxers and my t-shirt. I noticed he didn't shave and couldn't help but ask, because Jake was striking any way, but in my opinion he looked better without facial hair.

"What's with all the fuzz, Wolverine?"

"Sorry just too tired to shave, but if it bothers you too much I can do it now." He looked apologetically at me.

"Nah, we're just going to sleep, tomorrow you can shave, I really don't care for the scruffy look." I chuckled at the look of disappointment in Jake's face when he noticed I was dressed. "I'm not sleeping naked with you; I don't want to tempt fate." Jake understood that it will take some time for me to trust him again, but we had very long lives ahead of us to work out all the kinks.

He slid under the covers beside me, on instinct I curled myself on his body and we both inhaled deeply enjoying once again the scent of our mate. Placing my head on his chest I listened to the sweet melody of Jake's strong steady heartbeat, allowing it to lull me to sleep.

The next day I woke up before Jake, during the night I got almost on top of him and he had his arms around me. Gently moving so I was laying on my side I observed his sleeping form, his face looked young and innocent, so beautiful, with long dark lashes and silky black hair. His full rose colored lips had the most perfect pout, they begged to be nibbled and I had to hold myself so I wouldn't attack his lips right then and there. Reaching up I traced his lips with my index finger, they were slightly parted and his hot breath on my hand made me shiver.

My actions woke him up, but I was filled with joy when his eyes found mine. I was the first one to speak. "Good morning beautiful." Usually he would've called me that, but I needed to call things by their name and my Jake was beautiful. I was so amused when he blushed like a schoolgirl, now I understood how he felt when he elicited the same response out of me, this felt really good, more than good; it felt fantastic.

"My Seth you're here, it was not a dream." He held me close to his chest and I burrowed my face on the crook of his neck. We stayed in our embrace with even our breathing becoming synchronized while he ran his hands up and down my back and I ran my fingers through his hair.

"Yes Jake I'm here but I'm starving." I knew it was not very romantic, but my stomach was rumbling so loud it was not even funny.

"I don't know if there is anything to eat in the house, but we'll check."

"If there is nothing, we can go to Sam's house I'm sure Emily will be more than happy to make something for us." Jake gave me one of his trademark smiles and I knew why, I called my old home Sam's house. In a way Jake's house never stopped being my home, even after I left, my home was wherever he was.

We walked downstairs holding hands to find a wide eyed Billy in the living room.

"Seth you're back!" I never thought Billy would be happy to see me; he wheeled himself towards us and grabbed our intertwined hands. "Welcome home Seth."

"Thanks Billy, it's good to be back with my Jake." I glanced at Jake and the emotion in his eyes spoke volumes.

Luckily there was some cheese and bologna, Jake made sandwiches while I spoke to Emily on the phone. To say she was excited was the understatement of the year; she didn't know whether to cry or to laugh. I thanked her for everything and told her that I would go by later to get my clothes and some other things I needed. I was moving in with Jake, it was my decision and my choice.

After breakfast we walked to Sam's house side by side while holding hands. I told him about the three days I spent away from La Push. I was very surprised to hear that he was listening in on the conversation I had with Sam and Leah the morning after I left. I explained to him how I felt that somebody was in a lot of pain and that was the weird thing I told Sam about, now I understood that it was him, I was feeling his pain.

Jacob helped me hang some of my clothes in the closet, while the rest went in the dresser. It was so cute and funny to hear him whimper when he caught a glimpse at my closet, his pout had the power to melt my heart and the only way to make it go away was to promise him that I would still sleep naked and shower with him. I didn't mind doing either one of them; I got so used to sleeping naked that now it was uncomfortable to wear even boxers to bed and the showers, well I didn't mind the benefits of showering with Jake one bit.

The desk that was collecting dust in the corner of our room now had my computer on it, as well as some pictures of me and my family. Jake admitted that the computer came from him, it was sad to hear about all the sacrifices he had made for me, using his hard earned money to buy me such an expensive gift. I blanched when he admitted he used some of the money he had earned to buy our bed, because he wanted something very sturdy and comfortable to sustain what he hoped would be many passion filled nights.

I was ecstatic when Jake assured me I was going to be able to go to college, that with his position in the council he was sure I could get a scholarship and he would cover the rest of it. We would still live together because he couldn't fathom the idea of being separated from me, especially after everything we had experienced. We would get an apartment halfway between Seattle and Forks, it would be quite a commute for both of us, but we could make it work. All this time I thought my options were being taken away from me and now I realized that the only one nixing my options was me.

The hardest part for Jacob was watching me leave to go visit my family, they lived less than a quarter of a mile away but to him I could've been going to China. The first few times I knew he followed me, we were so attuned to each other that I could sense his presence even if I couldn't see him or catch his scent. Every time I said good-bye he held me tight, but fighting against every instinct allowed me to go, but not before asking me to come back to him.

After several gentle reminders Jake taught me how to drive. I caught on quite easy and only needed a few lessons. After mastering the truck I wanted to learn to drive Jake's motorcycle, he almost choked on his food when I told him during dinner. Surprisingly he agreed, with only one condition, that I allowed him to wrap me in bubble wrap; I knew there was a catch, stupid jerk.

A good part of the summer was gone and because of my imprisonment I had not been able to do anything fun. Unfortunately between Jake's work and his other duties I spent most days by myself, unless Leah or Emily kept me company. The pack, especially Quil, would've been more than willing to go to the beach or in hiking expeditions, but I told Jake I wouldn't be by myself with any male. I understood my position as his submissive and knew that I had more power over him than he would ever have over me. It didn't bother me anymore to grant him small requests, when it came to what really mattered, I could make things go my way.

I was very excited because the summer bonfire was going to take place in a couple of days. This was the first bonfire I was going to attend as a member of the pack; even though I was not allowed to go on patrol, I was still part of the pack. Jake's reasoning made a lot of sense to everybody during the last meeting, when Paul questioned why I was not doing any patrols when even Brady had to cover plenty of shifts. The reason was, that I was unable to detect the leeches scent and could not phase when I encountered any of them, something that made me more a liability, than any kind of help.

Paul's face was priceless when Jake answered him, after he dared to ask, what was then my place in the pack? To tell the truth, so was mine. He looked at him directly in the eye and told him _Seth is responsible for continuing the alpha lineage, something that nobody here is capable off and by the way, before you decide to pick on Seth be warned that he outranks you._ I was flabbergasted, how could I outrank Paul? He was the second one to phase and was Sam's beta until Jake phased.

"Jake, why did you tell Paul I outranked him?" Since Jake cooked I offered to do the dishes, trying to pull my weight any way could. Bill excused himself to the living room to watch some game.

"Because you do Seth, actually you outrank everybody except me."

"But … how can that be Jake? I don't do anything for the pack I cannot even sniff out a damn leech." Jake stood up from the table and walked towards me, placing one hand on my hip and the other on my cheek as he spoke.

"Baby the reason I told Paul was only half of it, I didn't say the main one because I wanted to tell you first. Every pack has an alpha which in our case is a male and my alpha wolf is male, the alpha wolf seeks out a female alpha to mate in an effort to create stronger packs. In our case your female wolf is that alpha wolf. You are the only one who can continue the alpha lineage, if our child ever phases he or she will be the future alpha and chief of this reservation." He moved the hand that was on my hip and lovingly placed it on my stomach and rubbed it gently.

"That means that I'm also an alpha? But I don't have an alpha voice or any of that crap." He smiled at my choice of words.

"Because you don't need to, if I ever became incapacitated you will have the choice to lead the pack yourself or allow Sam to lead, then everything will come to you."

"Jake it doesn't make any sense, a pack cannot have a submissive as a leader" I was seriously confused with all the new information.

"Seth the fact that you are a submissive doesn't take away your courage and strength. Have you ever seen a mother protect her babies? They would take on something that was even twice their size. That's you my love, I know that if the time ever came, you will protect the pack and our people like a mama protects her babies"

I couldn't wrap my mind around the fact that I was an alpha wolf; it was even more confusing when you added the fact that it was a female alpha. I just hoped that Jake wouldn't see me as a woman, that would piss me off, I didn't have anything against women but I wasn't one. If something happened to Jake I would lead the pack? I just hopped that time never came; I refused to even think of the possibility of something happening to him.

"Sethy I can't wait to put a baby in you, when are you going to give into my charms?" He started kissing my neck while rubbing his hands down my sides.

"Jake, you give yourself too much credit, you are not that charming." I teasingly answered while trying to keep a straight face. He reacted by pretending to be offended and walking back to the table with that adorable pout adorning his face.

"By the way Jake, Emily asked me to go with her to the store to get the food for the bonfire, I told her I was going to ask you, but didn't see a problem, that's ok, right?"

"No Seth, is not ok, that's not what we agreed on. You promised to stay within the limits of La Push and the grocery store is in Forks. Call Emily tomorrow and tell her you can't go." He was right; I did say I would stay in La Push, but for Pete's sake it was Forks and with Emily. If Sam had no problem letting her go why was Jake acting like such a douche bag?

"Whatever man, I'm going to bed." I was pissed with myself for making unrealistic promises and with him for holding on to those promises like they were etched in stone.

"Seth, stop."

"No Jake, you stop, yes I did say I would stay within La Push but its Forks and with Emily. Sam has no reservations with letting her go, what's your problem?"

"Sam hates the idea of Emily leaving La Push but if he doesn't let her, she gets mad and he doesn't get any. Since I'm not getting it anyway, it doesn't matter if you get angry and by the way if you tell Sam I told you this I'll kill you." Jake was not happy, but I knew it was an empty threat.

I was beyond words, what could I say to that? I found it totally ridiculous and hilarious at the same time. Sam was afraid of Emily; shit I needed to talk to her and ask her how to manipulate these overbearing, possessive wolves. I had to try something I've watched her do on more than one occasion. Walking toward Jake I sat on his lap facing him with one leg on each side while my arms rested around his neck. He looked at me in in total surprise.

"Let's reach a compromise, if you let me go with her, tomorrow when we shower I'll do stuff to you." Jake's eyebrows rose on his forehead then he furrowed them. "What kind of stuff, Seth?" I couldn't blame him for demanding an explanation.

"Like the stuff you do to me" his eyes became so wide I thought they would fall off his face, so many emotions etched on his face, lust, longing, love and need, all of them mixed into an unique emotion that had no name, I'll call it… freaking horny for Seth, yep, that sums it up.

"You will blow me?" Jake looked hopeful and impossibly sexy.

"Yes I will, but that's only if I go, if I have to stay here bored all day, just like Sam, you won't get any." I felt my face burn with the blushing. It bothered me not knowing if Jake would think less of me for offering myself this way, but what the heck! What guy in his right mind will turn down a blow job?

"I don't know Seth, on one hand the idea of you blowing me is unreal, but on the other hand I'm terrified of something happening to you." This was a total surprise; I thought that for sure he would jump at the opportunity of getting some oral action.

"Can I sleep on it and tell you in the morning?"

"Sure."

The next morning Jake reluctantly told me I could go. His excitement for what was going to be waiting for him overruled his judgment. I knew he was scared, but I guessed his cock won this battle. He breathed a sigh of relief when I called him at work to let him know I was ok and we were back in Sam's house, I had given him my cell phone so I could call him as soon as I got back.

I made dinner for the three of us putting into practice some of Emily's cooking lessons. I was not as good as her or Jake for that matter, but we were still alive and nobody had developed indigestion after eating my food.

When Jake got home after some meeting he had with Quil Sr. we sat down to eat. Jake kept glancing in my direction and I could almost read on his face the excitement for what he knew was going to be his dessert. I felt nervous and apprehensive but this was something I was ready for, my main concern was not hurting him with my teeth due to my lack of experience.

After we did the dishes we said good night to Billy and went upstairs, to shower and go to bed. Unable to wait one more second Jake pulled me towards the bathroom, locking the door behind him. I could hear his heart beating so fast and loud that it melted my heart, especially knowing the reason for his excitement.

"Baby, I've been thinking about this all day, you have no idea how long I wanted you to do this."

"You are wrong; I do have a pretty good idea." Grinning like idiots we undressed each other, and got in the shower.

We scrubbed ourselves, I wanted to give Jake the whole treatment, washing his hair and everything, but he wouldn't let me, he was too anxious and horny as hell. I made him suffer taking my sweet time to wash my hair and scrub myself twice. He couldn't wait any longer and pulled me towards him in a heated kiss filled with need and lust.

"Sethy, please I'm dying here, don't make me wait any longer."

I trailed down his neck covering it with kisses and gentle bites, until I found what I had been looking for. Jake gasped loudly when I kissed his sweet spot, kissing one side while I caressed the other with one of my hands.

I sank to my knees in front of him with the water gently hitting my back. His cock was as hard as a rock standing proudly in front of my face. I was hesitant at first, not knowing how it would taste or if I would gag from the sheer size of it. Testing the waters I stuck my tongue out and swirled it around the head, Jake's moan was immediate and I felt proud I could incite that sound out of him. It didn't taste bad at all, a little salty from what I guessed was pre-cum, I remembered the salty flavor from the time I tasted myself in his mouth.

I decided to go for it and took him in my mouth as far in as I could, which judging for what was still out was not much. I tried to relax my throat and go deeper but gagged and had to pull back. I felt really embarrassed for my incompetence at giving him a decent blow job.

"Jake I'm sorry for not doing a good job, I swear I'm trying, but I've never done this before"

"Baby you are doing great, you don't have to take my whole length in your mouth; it's just a little too big for that. Take it in as far as it is comfortable and for the rest use your hand."

With newfound confidence I took him in my mouth as far as I could, wrapping my right hand around the base. I found a good rhythm bopping my head back and forth while stroking him. I tasted him in my mouth and surprised myself when I moaned; I guessed that either the sound or the vibrations really did a number on Jake when he threaded his fingers on my hair gently pulling me towards him.

I pulled my head back and his cock sprung out of my mouth with a crude pop. "Jake you taste really good." Looking at me through half lidded eyes, he smiled and directed his cock towards my mouth once again. I greedily took him sucking forcefully while stroking him with one hand and kneading his balls with the other. I locked eyes with Jake for a second while swirling the tip with my tongue, he groaned and closed his eyes while biting his lower lip.

He whimpered when I let go of his cock, but I wanted to suck his balls the same way he had done it to me many times. It was different, the scant hairs on them tickled my tongue and the scent that emanated from his pubic hair was animalistic and addictive. While I took each ball into my mouth sucking them gently, I pumped his cock sliding my closed fist along its length with slow and determined strokes.

Jake was bucking into my hand; his moans were mixed with my name and a good amount of curses. I could tell he was close, taking him again in my mouth I sucked in my cheeks trying to achieve good suction, while swallowing around his member. If that was even possible I felt him grow even bigger inside my mouth, he was bucking now into my mouth literally fucking my face.

"Baby I'm so close." Jake could barely speak, his voiced getting drowned by his constant moans. As a response I sunk my head taking him as deep as I could and I felt his warm seed sliding down my throat while he repeated my name saying how much he loved me and a few unintelligible words. I kept sucking and licking until I felt him begin to get soft.

At this point he was leaning against the cold tiled wall of the shower. Standing up I hugged him making sure he wouldn't fall, while peppering his face with kisses. He had his eyes closed and looked completely relaxed, something uncommon for him. When he opened them he found me looking intently at him.

"Seth, that had to be the most fucktastic experience of my entire life."

"I'm glad you enjoyed yourself, next time will be better, I promise."

"Baby don't sell yourself short, you are an amazing cock sucker." I didn't know if I should've felt insulted or not, he caught my expression.

"It's a good thing baby, it was awesome."

Jake POV

The night of the bonfire Seth walked downstairs wearing one of the new outfits he got for his birthday. A pair of beige cargo shorts and a black t-shirt that was snug enough for me to notice his defined abs. My resolve faltered when I considered the fact that the whole pack was going to be there and Seth looked amazing, the green eyed monster making me create scenarios in my head that were ridiculous and not likely to happen.

I knew that nobody from the pack would dare to put the moves on him, but couldn't help feeling insecure. Seth and I were getting closer every day, both physically and emotionally. Seth had been touching me willingly and even gave me a couple of blow jobs, which always left me sated and happy. The first one in the shower was the realization of so many fantasies I had during the last five months, I wanted to see him in the shower kneeling in front of me, with the water hitting his back and just that image sent me to a world of ecstasy.

He couldn't acknowledge his feelings for me, not yet, but I knew he loved me; I was not deluding myself into believing that, I just knew it.

"Wow Seth you look amazing, I think you shouldn't go." I saw Seth's expression change to anger the moment he heard me.

"Why?" His tone was snappy and his heart was racing.

"Baby, you just look too good, I'm jealous of any of the guys seeing how beautiful you are."

"Jake you're being ridiculous; don't start getting all wolfie possessive again."

"I'm half joking baby, of course you're going. I need you to be there tonight,"

"Why Jake?"

"You'll see."

I helped my father get in the truck and Seth rode in the back, I felt horrible with him riding in the back. I didn't want him to think for one minute, I was humiliating him by making him ride in the back while my father and I rode in the front, the fact was that there wasn't enough room and Billy didn't trust his driving yet.

When we arrived at the beach it was still early and not many people were there yet. Seth jumped off and got Billy's wheelchair off the truck then walked beside us towards the beach. Sam and Emily were already setting up while Leah and Paul worked on getting the fire started. Seth ran towards Emily and gave her a big hug, I had to stifle a growl when I saw Sam slap his shoulder, he was just showing affection, but it meant that another male had his hands on what was mine, even if he was his brother, it still bothered me.

After helping my father get situated next to Old Quil I went back to where Seth was talking to Leah and Paul. It was very amusing to see their expression when I hugged Seth from behind and instead of rejecting me, he leaned back against my chest; it was a mixture of surprise and annoyance. Leah was the first one to speak, "I guess things are going ok with you two?"

"Oh yes." I answered while Seth chuckled and lifted his gaze to meet my eyes.

Jared and Kim were the next ones to arrive, Kim approached us hesitantly and waved hello to Seth. He walked towards her and gave her a small hug that she happily returned, Jared bumped fists with Seth, action that would have made me cringe if it wasn't for the fact that Seth looked so happy and if he was happy so was I.

Embry and Brady came out of the woods running in our direction; they were in charge of doing patrol before and after the bonfire and were probably just getting done with the first part of their shift. As they were approaching us Paul made Brady trip, making him fall towards Seth, both of them toppling to the ground in a maze of arms and legs. Before I could reach him, Seth was already standing up, embarrassed and angry with Paul. After making sure Seth was ok I moved towards Brady ready to beat him to a pulp for touching my Seth, I knew it was not his fault, but I couldn't help it, I was furious.

I could see the look of terror in Brady's eyes as I approached him, after I was done with him it would be Paul's turn; apparently he hadn't learned his lesson from the night of Seth's birthday. Suddenly Seth stood between Brady and me, placing his hands flat on my chest he commanded for me to look at him, it was not a request, it was an order.

"Jake stop and look at me, it was not Brady's fault; he didn't mean to touch me." Looking into his eyes and with the sound of his voice invading me, I felt the anger melting away, turning me to putty in his hands. All the eyes were wide with incredulity for what was happening in front of them. My sweet Seth stood on his tippy-toes and gave me a chaste kiss on the lips, disarming me completely. "Good boy."

"Brady I suggest you keep your distance for the rest of the night, ok buddy?" Seth voice carried both authority and tenderness, almost like… a mother. I could never tell him this, but at that moment I thought he would make an excellent pack mother, somebody that all the guys will respect and ask for counsel or help when they needed it.

"Paul stop being such a jerk, I swear that if Jake decides to go after you I will not stop him." I was so proud of Seth for standing up for himself and I wouldn't need to hurt Paul, he was already getting plenty of grief from Leah.

Quil was the last one to arrive, looking happy and cheery as usual. Seth knowing how I felt about Quil, stood beside me wrapping his arms around my waist lovingly, I placed my arm over his shoulder but couldn't help but notice the quick look Quil exchanged with my imprint after saying hello. I felt anxious and angry again but needed to trust Seth, unfortunately I couldn't bring myself to trust Quil, I could trust him with my life, but not with my imprint.

After we all ate, my father called everybody to order asking them to take a seat around the fire so we could all listen to the stories of our ancestors. This was the moment I had been preparing for; this was my surprise to the pack and especially to Seth.

Old Quil was the first one to speak, telling in his baritone voice the tale of the origin of our capacity to shape-shift. How our ancestors had the ability to use astral projection to extend their consciousness outward and put their spirits into the body of a wolf. How they would leave their much weaker human bodies and inhabit the body of the almighty wolf. How their spirits free of the boundaries of the physical world were free to reach higher levels of enlightenment.

Then it was my father's turn, he went more into detail telling us about Taha Aki and the third wife, his imprint, how she sacrificed herself to assure the survival of the tribe. Her sons enraged by her death phased out of anger, making them the first ones to phase without using astral projection. When my father was finished it was my turn, I nervously stood up next to Billy and after diverting my gaze at Seth for a second, I began.

"After two generations without shape-shifters in our land, the presence of the cold ones nearby triggered the once dormant gene in our blood, allowing us to phase into the powerful wolf just like our ancestors did. Hence the creation of a new pack, even though we are young, we carry in our blood the bravery and the knowledge of all the generations that preceded us. The new pack consists of Sam Clearwater, first one to phase, the first alpha of the pack, a true mentor and friend. His black wolf is characterized by his strength, loyalty and bravery but this is only secondary to his wisdom, the spirits of our ancestors are truly strong in him."

"Paul Lahote, the most temperamental member of the pack, his bad temper is only surpassed by the courage of his silver wolf, meeting danger without fear and staying focused during a fight, keeping himself and all those around him safe. Jared Cameron the jokester of the pack, his easy going attitude helps him be well liked by all who meet him. His brown wolf is known for its acute hearing and his selflessness, never seeking recognition or fame, makes him shine among our pack."

"Embry Call, the mysterious and quiet member of the pack, somebody who I'm honored to call friend. His gray wolf will put his life on the line to protect a pack member, the great empathy and compassion that characterizes his everyday life making itself evident even in his wolf form; he cares for the welfare of others with little concern for his own needs. Quil Ateara, the most jovial and friendly member of the pack. His chocolate brown wolf will protect those who need it and will be unrelenting with his enemies; his courage and dependability are key factors in the interactions of the pack."

"Leah Clearwater, the first female shifter in recorded history, the big sister of the pack, keeping all of us in line. Her gray wolf is clever and fearless when it comes to the protection of our people. Brady Fuller, the youngest member of our pack, his ash brown wolf is well known for his eagerness and impulsivity, but even at this young age his decisiveness makes him an important asset to our pack."

"Seth Clearwater, as the submissive wolf of the pack he carries on his shoulders the great responsibility of continuing the alpha lineage. He is smart, caring, stubborn and trustworthy. Second in command in our pack, his alpha wolf is undeniably fast with no match among any living thing. He possesses an inner-strength and capacity to love unlike anybody I've ever seen." At this point I had to stop to compose myself since my throat was getting tight and my voice was filled with emotion.

"From this moment on, these names will be added to the archives of our tribe. The tales of our struggles, triumphs and experiences will be the legends that will become part of the history of the Quileute tribe. Our future generations will write songs in our names and tell their children the stories of our heroism, friendship and love for our tribe."

When I finished, looking around the bonfire I saw the emotion in each and every member of the pack. Their eyes glistening with the tears some of them were holding back, while others allowed them to flow freely. I was sure they couldn't believe that from this moment their names would be permanently etched in the pages of our history.

I felt a warm body next to me and my heart skipped a beat when I glanced at Seth's eyes, looking at me lovingly like I always dreamt he would, the moisture on his cheeks showing me the emotion he felt in his heart, "Jake I'm so proud of you, I'm proud to be your mate and will be honored to bear your children. You make a fine chief… Chief Jacob Black."

* * *

><p><strong>Well I hope you liked it, leave me a review and let me know what you think, your words of encouragement, your questions and constructive criticism help me grow as a writer.<strong>


	28. Chapter 28 Happiness Never Lasts

**Hello everybody! Thank you so much for everything, for all the favorite story and the story and author alerts. Especially thank you for your reviews, it's so great to read your reactions and feelings toward the story. **

**Talking about feelings I have a favor to ask, the end this chapter may stir some negative emotions in you, please if you feel you need to say something to me or to other reviewers be respectful and considerate.**

**You may have noticed that I changed my updating schedule; I waited more time to post this chapter. The reason for this is that on Dec. 26 I'm going on vacation for ten days and won't be able to post an update until I come back.**

**Finally to those of you who celebrate Christmas I wish you a wonderful holiday. To all of you, have a very happy new year!**

Chapter 28 Happiness never lasts

Today was a perfect Sunday; it was an unseasonable warm and sunny day, especially considering that it was almost September. Jacob didn't have work or patrol and I was looking forward to spending the day with him. Since he gave me my freedom everything had been amazing, it was funny that now that I was free, I wanted to spend as much time with him as possible, seeking his company every chance I had. I craved his company, his caresses, his kisses and every little thing we did together. My face felt warm with the blushing that probably covered it when I remembered all the occasions that our make-out sessions had gone almost to the point of no return. Jacob had been the perfect gentleman, stopping whenever I said no and only taking things as far as I allowed it.

There was one gray cloud in our perfect life; I couldn't tell Jake I loved him. Some days I woke up completely sure I was in love with him and ready to scream that truth to every corner of the world, other days, I was not so sure. I knew this hurt Jake, who dreamt about hearing me say those three words. But they were so meaningful and important to me that I wouldn't dare muster them, unless I was absolutely sure.

"Puppy are you ready?" It was Jacob's voice coming from the other side of the door of our room. It was technically our room, but for now I was sleeping in it, while Jake was staying in his own room. Jake had been very good at controlling his wolf, but sleeping next to me would be pressing our luck.

Opening the door my heart skipped a beat at the sight of the Greek god standing in the hallway. Unfortunately the frown on his face placed a damper on my enthusiasm.

"What's wrong Jake?" I asked, concerned about his gloomy disposition.

"You're not wearing a shirt." Ok, he was being ridiculous, every once in a while the asshole gene would resurface, making him act like a dick.

"No I'm not and neither are you. We are going for a run as wolves; you want me to bring a whole outfit?" I was aware of my tone; it really bothered me when he turned to the old behaviors.

"Don't get snappy Seth; you know I don't like anybody seeing you; that's why I always make sure that nobody from the pack is around when you are going to phase." I could sense Jake's anger, he had learned to control his wolf most of the time, but that didn't mean he didn't feel the rage that the wolf incited in him.

"Is Jakey jealous of a few ugly wolves?" Approaching him slowly I laced my arms around his neck and pulled him towards me to give him a kiss. Just as Jake had learned to control himself, I had learned to help him calm down. After a few conversations with Emily, I learned the calming effect of our touch, the first time I used that technique was at the bonfire and the result was more than spectacular.

"You bet I am! Shit Seth, I'm jealous of the air that touches your skin, wishing it was me who would be able to caress every inch of your body." I knew he craved my body more than anything; he was making a huge effort to remain true to our agreement, to not push me into having sex with him.

"Awww I think you kind of love me don't you?" I asked playfully, while placing butterfly kisses on his chest.

"You know I love you more than anything." He didn't ask me if I loved him, he stopped doing it after too many times feeling his heart break when my only answer was, _I don't know._

Feeling the air getting heavy, as it always did whenever we started talking about our feelings I pulled Jake towards the stairs. Once outside we walked towards the forest holding hands, as soon as we were a safe distance I took off my pants, feeling Jakes' eyes on me I turned, only to see him watching me in fascination.

"Stop looking at me, you pervert!" I said in mock anger.

"I can't stop looking at you, now that you wear clothes all the time, I miss seeing your beautiful body." I chuckled and used the slight annoyance I felt to bring out my wolf. I felt the heat as a ball of fire originating in my chest and spreading through my whole body, my bones shifting inside me, my skin being replaced with fur. The transformation only took a few seconds and my paws hit the floor with a loud thud, a sandy wolf standing proudly on the misty forest.

Looking beside me I saw a magnificent russet wolf looking at me lovingly, he was almost twice my size but he didn't scare me, I knew he would never hurt me.

I took off running through the forest and immediately he was in pursuit. Snaking around trees my small frame allowed me to evade branches easily and squeeze through small spaces that Jake would never fit through.

I could hear his thoughts, "Seth slow down, don't get too far, it makes me very nervous."

"Shit Jake you sound more like my mother than my boyfriend!" Oops, that was the worst thing about the mind link, you could not hide any of your thoughts; he heard it as if it was his own thought.

"Your boyfriend?" I could sense the joy mixed with a healthy dose of cockiness.

"Well you are a boy and you are my friend, so that makes you my boyfriend." I knew it was the lamest excuse ever, but for some stupid reason I wasn't willing to acknowledge he was my boyfriend. Jake mentally rolled his eyes at me.

"I know you are not ready to admit your feelings towards me Seth, but I know what's in your heart and I also know we will have very long lives together so you can say you love me as many times as you want." There was an undertone of sadness in his thoughts, it killed me to make him feel sad, but as he said we would have a long life together.

I slowed down to allow him to catch up with me, we ran together for a while. We were two furry bodies bumping into each other, playfully pushing each other out of the way. Jake tried to grab me by the fur on my neck to pull me around but I was able to get away easily. I felt happy, running with Jake was my new favorite activity; we shared many thoughts and even played crazy games of tag.

Taking a different way back, we came upon a clearing in the middle of the dense forest. I became enraged when I noticed that all the missing trees had been cut down, they didn't fall naturally. Somebody cut them down, more than ten trees. Shifting back to human form, I untied my pants from my leg quickly putting them on; Jake remained in his wolf form, never taking his eyes off me. I couldn't help but ask myself, who could do something like this?

"I'm so fucking pissed, who could destroy our forest like this Jake?" The forest around La Push was very special to me, looking at these old trees I could see myself as a young boy going for walks with my dad. In some way, all I had left of my father were my memories and this forest.

"It was me, Seth." I turned when his voice startled me, I didn't even notice when he shifted back to human form.

"How could you Jake? You of all people should know how important this forest is to me. Why did you do it?" I could see the regret and embarrassment in his expression, there had to be a good reason for his behavior.

"Remember when I told you I came to the forest to punch trees whenever I felt angry or horny and about to lose control. I made several of these clearings in the process." Looking around I was taken aback by the tremendous show of power I was witnessing.

Walking towards him I stood in front of him looking up at his beautiful brown eyes. I grabbed his hands and kissed them tenderly, repeating the actions of the day I saw the deplorable state of his hands after one of these episodes.

"Of course I remember, just promise to never do it again. Never hurt yourself on my account and never destroy any part of our forest again." Letting go of his hands I reached up and placed both hands on his face gently pulling him towards me. I placed a chaste kiss on his lips, but he had a different idea.

Jake pulled me towards him, kissing me passionately, invading my mouth with his able tongue in a fight for dominance that he invariably won. He placed one of his legs between mine, rubbing his rapidly growing bulge on my leg, this action sent waves of need through my body making my pants get tighter with each passing second.

"Man Jake, you are always horny aren't you?" I chuckled and pushed myself away from him, knowing that the only reason I was able to get away was because he allowed me too. That day more than ever I understood the raw power and strength Jake possessed.

"Only for you my love." Jake walked towards a tree that luckily did not meet his enraged fist and sat down leaning lazily against the trunk.

I sat between his legs with my back against the hard wall of muscle that made up his chest. Jake surrounded me with his massive arms encasing my chest, while lovingly kissing the top of my head. It was hard to wrap my mind around the fact that I felt so happy and protected in his arms, if anybody had told me a few months ago that I would enjoy his company the way I did, I would've called them a liar.

"I love your company Jake; you are creeping into my heart faster than I feel ready to accept you. It's a really good feeling, just scary sometimes."

"What are you scared of?"

"I don't really know, you have been really nice to me, showing every day how much you love me, but I can't help being afraid. So much has happened that sometimes is hard for me to leave that in the past and focus on the future." I had so many fears when it came to my relationship with Jake. What if the moment I told him I loved him, his wolf went crazy and raped me? What if once he knew, he backtracked on his promises and made me a prisoner again? So many questions, our relationship was so glorious that the idea of anything spoiling our idyllic romance terrified me.

"What can I do to help you be more at ease? I don't want you to be scared of me or our relationship!" Oh fuck! I did it again, by the tone of his voice I knew he was feeling dejected. Turning to face him I could see the fear and sadness in his eyes, why did he have to be so sensitive about everything I said?

"Jake I'm not afraid of having a relationship with you, as I said it's just hard to leave the past behind me. But I have to admit that even though I'm not afraid of you, I am afraid of that monster between your legs." He laughed at my description of his penis; the funniest thing was that I was not kidding. The idea of Jake making love to me scared me shitless, I didn't know what to expect and the unknown is most of the time scarier than most known situations.

"Baby you know I'll never force you or hurt you in any way, when the time comes you know I'll be tender and loving. I'll wait as long as you need me too, just don't make me wait too long; I can't wait for you to tell me you're ready." Jake rubbed his face against my neck kissing it enticingly. I rolled my eyes and went back to leaning against his chest.

"I know love, not knowing what to expect is very scary that's all."

"And you think I know? I have absolutely no clue about what to expect" I turned to my side so I could look at his beautiful face. Was he pulling my leg? A man as handsome and desirable as Jake had to have some experience in the sex department.

"Yeah right, like you haven't nailed half the girls in La Push and maybe even a few guys."

"You are mistaken Seth. I'm a… virgin, just like you."

"Jake you're so fucking full of it, are you making fun of me? Maybe if you would've given me a few more months before imprinting on me I wouldn't be a virgin anymore."

"Ok, first of all I'm not making fun of you; I've never been with anybody, male or female. Second, don't even joke about you being with anybody beside me, it makes me crazy jealous." I knew he was deadly serious, his heart was beating faster and he was hugging me tighter, not enough to bruise me, but enough for me to notice.

"Let's do something Jake, since we are both virgins and I'm so scared, why don't we try something. If you agree we'll go home right now and fuck like rabbits." I felt Jake's whole body tense, his heart was racing, a very alluring blush covered his gorgeous face and the sparkle in his lust filled eyes added itself to the whole look.

"What, Seth, what?" He asked eagerly.

"Aren't we an eager horny goat?" I couldn't help myself and teased him. "Why don't we go home and you let me fuck you, you'll bottom for me and we'll break the ice that way." I explained innocently hoping my little stunt wouldn't come back and bite me in the ass.

"Are you fucking kidding me? You think this is a joke? What you suggest it's impossible Seth, I'm a dominant, I don't bottom!" He all but screamed at me, I felt the color leave my face when I saw the anger in his eyes, his whole body tense with contained rage and frustration. Jake removed his hands from around my waist and was fisting the dirt around us obviously trying to control himself.

"I'm sorry Jake, I ...I…" I was lost for words, my bad joke made him furious and with all the right in the world. I should've thought about his feelings. I guessed that the asshole gene was an equally opportunity annoyer, showing up in either one of us.

"Seth you have no idea how hard it is to control what every fiber of my being wants to do, not to mention my wolf, his howling is constant and unforgiving. I see that to you this is not that important, but to me when we make love will be the single most glorious moment of my entire life. I was made for you and you were made for me and at that moment we will become one. I know you think it's not fair that you are destined to be my submissive, but that's the way it is, I didn't choose it this way." His words hit my very core like a wave of regret and an abrupt feeling of pain shot through me.

"Please Jake don't be angry it was a bad joke. Believe me when I tell you that the moment we make love will be memorable for me too, don't allow my rotten sense of humor to give you a different idea." I needed to put Jake at ease, not for me, I was not scared of him anymore, but I cared deeply about his peace of mind.

"I know baby, I'm sorry for losing my cool. First you start talking about being intimate with another person and then you joke about our mating. You should know by now the amount of insecurity and worry that comes with imprinting. The fact that you cannot imprint back on me, drives me insane with worry." I was surprised to realize that everything started with my comment about being a virgin and snowballed from there.

"And since when the only way to be happy together is by imprinting? There are no guarantees, look at us, in a way the imprinting made it harder for us, making you act like a dick most of the time. Think of your parents or mine, they didn't need any magic to create a bond between them and they were insanely in love with each other."

"You are right, when did you become so wise?" Jake's expression was a mixture of love and admiration.

"I've always been wise, but my dashing good looks can be very distracting." I tried not to laugh and dilute the effect of my words but it was very hard not to do it.

"You think you're all that don't you? You are beautiful but that statement just earned you a round of tickles." Jake attacked me, taking full advantage of the fact that I was extremely ticklish. After less than a minute of his unrelenting attack, I begged him to stop, not being able to deny me anything he complied.

"We should get back, we've been gone several hours already and you must be hungry." I stood up and Jake followed.

"We are not that far from the house, can we walk as humans? I love to hold your hand when we walk together." Jake was the eternal romantic; Emily was right when she told me he was.

Walking hand in hand we found one of the trails that lead to our house and followed it.

A rustling of leaves and branches breaking was all that alerted us to an unknown presence. Turning at the same time in the direction of the noise, we saw three massive figures walking towards us. We were both immediately on alert, Jake sniffing the air trying to catch their scent. I was unable to determine if they were leeches unless I saw their eyes, because they smelled differently to me.

"Are they leeches?" I whispered to Jake.

"I don't think so, but they are not human either. If I'm not mistaken they are shifters, stay behind me Seth, I have a bad feeling about this trio." Shifters? If that was the case what were they doing here?

The strangers approached us slowly, walking in a V formation. They all had dark skin; they were also very tall and muscular. They were dressed in cutoffs and t-shirts and none of them wore shoes. These men looked the part, but where did they come from? The tallest one was on my left; he was as tall as Jake, with broad shoulders and huge biceps. The one in the center seemed to be the leader; he was about six-foot-five with a thick neck and huge hairy arms. The one to my right was the shortest of the three but was still a good foot taller than me; he had spiky black hair, dark heavy brows and a prominent nose.

Stopping in front of us they eyed us inquisitively, the tallest one had his eyes glued on me, making me very uncomfortable. This idiot had no idea who he was messing with, if Jake noticed he would definitely not like it and be tempted to rearrange his face. I knew they were as curious about us as we were about them, I heard them inhale deeply, probably trying to catch our scent.

"Hi, my name is Donovan King; these are my friends Max Matwau and Rex Thomson." The one in the front introduced himself and his companions. He sounded polite and friendly but every instinct was telling me not to trust him. Watching Jake I noticed he shared my feelings about the newcomers, his eyebrows were furrowed and his jaw was tense.

"I'm Jacob and he is Seth, what are you doing here?" Jake was more anxious than I thought, he cut to the chase immediately, trying to find out the reason for their presence here.

"We are just passing through; we are on our way to Canada for vacation." Donovan answered promptly.

"And you are walking there? Through the woods? You should be more careful you never know what could be lurking around these woods, especially at night." Jake gave them a polite and careful smile.

"That won't be a problem; we're shifters like you, which make us the most dangerous predators in this forest." Donovan was joined by his friends as they shared a malicious chuckle.

"Shifters? What do you mean by that?" Jake was testing them, he probably caught on the malicious chuckle and the way he called himself and his friends predators. We never called ourselves predators, we were protectors. A predator implied victimizing and destroying. If these guys considered themselves predators they were not true protectors of any tribe.

"Donovan, he doesn't trust us, Rex why don't you show him?" This time it was the one to my left who spoke, his soft-spoken voice not fooling anybody. He did not take his eyes off me for even a second. I noticed Jake's reaction, but he was holding back, not lashing at him like he usually would. It was obvious Jake didn't want to start a fight.

The one called Rex removed his clothes, not even turning around or going into the bushes. I diverted my gaze away from him as a consideration and respect towards Jake. Rex phased into a silver wolf with black paws and a black face. Jake's gaze was glued on the biggest one, Max; I knew it was because he wouldn't stop looking at me.

"Ok you're shifters; why are you away from your pack? What reservation are you from?" Jake demanded answers and was not giving them any information about us or our pack, he was being extremely careful and suspicious.

"We are from the Awally reservation in California, as I said before we are on vacation. We haven't had any leech activity in almost a year so our alpha gave us a few days off." Donovan's honeyed voice was not being successful at getting us to trust him, quite the contrary.

"What the fuck is your problem? Stop looking at him!" Jake was losing his cool fast, he couldn't hold back anymore.

"Sorry I meant no disrespect; I'm just fascinated with him. I've never seen a submissive and he is so well trained." What did he mean with well trained? I'm not a fucking dog.

"Max, what are you talking about?" Donovan appeared to be genuinely curious about his friend's statement.

"Brother, it's something I never thought I would see. I heard about it on the legends, but never believed it; I guess I should trust our legends a little bit more. Seth is submissive wolf; he has a female wolf inside him, a bitch. He is smaller and weaker than us and the funniest thing is that he can get pregnant." His eyes were dark and he stood menacingly beside his friends. Everything about Max screamed DANGER.

"Seth, why don't you go ahead back home, I'll join you after I escort these guys out of our lands." Now I was extremely worried, Jake knew something was wrong and wanted to put me at a safe distance from these men.

"Why are sending your brother away, we're not going to hurt either one of you. He is so ….. beautiful." Again it was Max who spoke while taking a few steps in my direction.

"He is not my brother, he is my mate. You better stop looking at him and talking like that, if you know what's good for you." Jake was shaking, but not out of fear, he was angry, mad at this stranger who seemed to be taken with me.

"He can't be your mate; he doesn't have a mating mark. He hasn't been claimed." Max looked at me and his expression transformed from deceive to lust, his eyes glazed over, licking his lips like he was looking at a juicy steak.

"I want him." Max took several steps forward, standing in front of Donovan. I understood now that Max was the leader and they pretended that he was not in charge in order to deceive those who would trust them and protect the alpha.

"He is not up for grabs." I took a step back because Jake was starting to blur, I knew he was trying to delay it, but he was almost at the point of no return.

"SETH, GO HOME NOW!" This command carried the double timbre of the alpha voice with it. I obeyed immediately phasing on the run and taking off at top speed towards the house.

"REX, GRAB HIM" I could feel Rex in pursuit; he was trying to catch up with me. I needed to alert the pack, we needed help. They could hurt Jake, no they wouldn't, he was stronger than them. Running as fast as I could, I was able to create some distance between Rex and me.

I reached Jacob's thoughts and all I saw was sharp teeth and red.

"JAKE, JAKE are you ok?" I sent my thoughts to Jake but all I could see were snapping jaws and claws moving menacingly towards him. These bastards were viciously attacking Jake and there was nothing I could do to help him. Through his eyes I was able to see when he sunk his teeth in Max's neck, good job baby, you're so strong.

I stopped when I realized Rex was not following me anymore, I couldn't understand his reason for giving up on his pursuit, until I saw him come into Jake's view. I could only guess that Jake hurt Max and he called Rex's for backup. Now they were three against one, even somebody as strong as Jake couldn't handle three wolves attacking him.

Jake was trying to strategize how to shake off the wolf who was pinning him to the floor, while one of the other wolves was trying to tear his throat. Everything was happening so fast, all I saw were flashes of teeth and blood. I felt a sharp pain on my side at the same time that Jake's yelp reached me. Jake turned his head and for a second I saw a flash of razor-sharp teeth latching onto his shoulder.

"HELP! Anybody there, guys Jake is being attacked anybody, please!" I was desperate, in my panic trying to reach anybody who could assist us. The alpha command weighting heavily on me didn't allowed me to move in Jake's direction. I knew that I wasn't strong enough to fight any of those guys, but at least I could be a distraction or maybe help lure one of them away from him. I had to do something; I needed to help my mate.

"Seth, what's going on?" it was Jared's voice.

"Hurry up Jared we need help! Three wolves are attacking Jake, he is fighting them to protect me, get the pack get here, hurry we need you!" I mentally screamed at him.

I felt another sharp pain, this time on my leg and I couldn't stand around doing nothing anymore. I walked in circles fighting against the order to stay away. I allowed the fury to overtake me, to give me strength, I fed from it. My instinct helped me defeat the alpha order and run towards my mate to save him or die trying. My only objective was to protect my mate, even if that meant losing my own life.

Running towards the clearing I could already hear the growls and the snapping sound of jaws trying to tear flesh away from bone. I would have only one chance to surprise them; I needed to use my only tool, my speed. From a distance I saw the scariest sight anyone could ever witness, Jake was pinned on the floor by a brown wolf with white spots on its back. All the while a silver wolf with a black face, Rex, was gnawing on one of his hind legs. While the third wolf, a huge black one, was trying to sink his teeth into Jake's vulnerable neck. Jake was frantically clawing and snapping his jaws all around him but his strength was failing him and I could see he had many injuries with blood running freely down his fur and onto the ground.

I understood that my target should be the biggest threat at the moment, the black wolf, he was getting ready to administer a mortal blow and I couldn't allow that. I was sure that one was Max and by the sheer size of it, I guessed he was the alpha. Running at top speed I concentrated all my anger, my fear, my fury and my love on my objective, to get that bastard away from my Jake.

I dug my back legs into the ground and leapt with tremendous power, crashing onto the side of the black wolf knocking him into a boulder, taking advantage of the few seconds it took him to compose himself I latched my razor-sharp teeth onto his unguarded neck, and went for the kill. I could taste the coppery taste of his blood in my mouth, making the rage that was surging through my veins grow exponentially. Max fought weakly but I had inflicted a mortal wound, giving me the opportunity to effectively snap his neck with a loud crack. The agonized cry that came out of him was brief, but I was sure it would haunt me for the rest of my life. I felt the wolf go limp as his heartbeat withered and died. Max's blood stained my muzzle running down my chest and ending on my paws.

Noticing the fate of his alpha, Rex charged towards me, I moved swiftly and his unforgiving teeth missed me by an inch. We circled each other, fangs bared, measuring each other's strengths and weaknesses, by now he knew that I was much weaker than him, but I was still able to kill his alpha, for this reason he was being very cautious. All I could hear was the sound of snapping jaws, growling and the occasional yelp, all coming from Jake's direction. At least now Jake stood a chance, we were fighting on even grounds, I lured Rex away from Jake and I was sure he could dispose of Donovan easily. I looked at the beast in front of me, his cruel yellow eyes standing out among the black fur of his face.

For and instant I looked at Jake and was dumbfounded to see him sitting down while fighting off the brown wolf, which I was pretty sure was Donovan, only at a second glance I noticed the reason, both hind legs seemed to be in an unnatural position, those bastards broke his legs! Anger and rage had substituted blood in my veins and the need to protect my mate overtook all my senses, I wanted to sink my teeth into his miserable flesh and taste his blood in my mouth like I had tasted Max's.

Taking advantage of my momentary distraction Rex lunged in my direction; I dodged and leapt towards him effectively sweeping his face with my razor sharp claws. Turning back at wolf speed, Rex snapped at my throat, I was able to evade him, but he got a hold of my front right leg and all I heard was the sound of flesh ripping and an intense burning pain on my leg. I was able to slip from his hold; assessing my injury I could see it was only superficial. The air was thick with the smell of blood and I couldn't help but cringe in desperation when I saw that the ground around Jake was soaked with blood.

Rex leapt towards me and this time I was not fast enough and he buried his teeth on my shoulder making me howl in pain. I clawed his side furiously trying to make him let me go, the fur from his side was being shredded to pieces and blood was flowing freely from the multiple wounds, but he wouldn't let go of my shoulder. I heard loud howls at a distance and was relieved to know that the pack was on its way. I didn't know how much time passed since the fight began but I knew that Jake was badly hurt and couldn't even talk to me through our mental bond. Using the strength of my legs, I kicked Rex's flank making him let go as he gasped for air.

I needed to guard myself from another more successful lunge of Rex's powerful jaws. We circled each other, like lightning Rex lunged in my direction, I turned to run in the opposite direction but he was able to grab my left hind leg in his huge mouth and clamped down, the sound of a branch breaking reached my ears as he crushed muscle and bone. I felt the sharp pain on my leg, there was no doubt about it, I knew my leg was broken and this beast kept gnawing at it like he wanted to tear it off my body.

The wind howled around us bringing with it the scent of my brothers who were approaching us at a frantic pace. With my right leg I kicked Rex in a desperate attempt to break his hold but he merely sunk his teeth deeper making me howl in pain. With all my strength I kicked his muzzle effectively making him let go of my leg which now laid twisted and limp. Rex barraged towards me hitting my side, making us tumble across the forest floor growling and snapping. Unfortunately he ended up on top of me and I felt a snarling whine leave my throat as I saw the merciless fangs approaching my neck.

At that moment like the cavalry the pack emerged from different directions, Quil's chocolate wolf launching itself towards Rex and saving my life. Both bodies tumbled on the ground in a flash of claws and teeth. Another brown shape joined Quil in subjugating the beast, finally pinning him to the floor. Liberated from the body that was obstructing my view, I breathed a sigh of relief when I saw Sam's black wolf and Paul's silver form dragging the brown wolf away from Jake.

Agony lanced my chest when I saw Jake collapse on the blood soaked forest floor. I tried to stand up but my mangled left hind leg gave under me, trying to hold myself with my front paws I felt a sharp pain on my torn shoulder. Dragging myself towards Jake, my own body twitching with crippling pain, inch after agonizing inch I was able to reach him.

His limp body laid in a puddle of his own blood; I nuzzled his neck gently and licked his muzzle. In an attempt to reach his mind I called him. "_Jake, Jake please answer me._" There was no response; my only comfort came from the weak sound of his beating heart.

Sam approached me with concern evident in his eyes, "_Seth are you ok_?"

"_It hurts but I'll be fine, I'm worried about Jake, he is not responding._"

"_Why don't you try changing back to human and talking to him, maybe hearing your voice will help him._" Mustering the little strength I had left, I willed my body into changing back to my human form, the pain as my broken bones relocated themselves inside my body was unbearable.

"AHHHHH Oh God, it hurts so bad!" The first words to come out of my mouth were a cry of pain, but I had a bigger concern, the other half of my soul laying on the floor next to me. I needed to help him, to make him come back to us; I refused to let him sink into the dark abyss.

"Jake please open your eyes, it's me Seth." I rubbed my hands on his muzzle and his neck, only to realize his fur was soaked with his blood, even with his enhanced healing if he kept bleeding like this his heart was not going to resist. We had to do something.

"Leah you're the fastest, run to the house and call the doctor, tell him Jake is seriously hurt, he is bleeding profusely from several wounds and has several broken bones." I ordered, and Leah took off running towards the house.

"Jake, you have to wake up, you need to phase to human form, it will be easier to treat your wounds as a human. Please Jake I know you're in pain, but do it for me, please Jakey please." Slowly the russet wolf beside me opened his eyes, he was fighting; he was coming back to us.

"Baby is me your Seth, please change to human, we need to get you to the doctor. I know it hurts but you are strong, you can do it Jake." he closed his eyes and a howl broke the silence that permeated in the forest, it was like the little critters were afraid of the terrifying scene unfolding in front of them, making it deadly quiet around us. The howl changed gradually to a human scream as Jake's naked form laid on the forest floor. He was covered in cuts and bruises; there was not one inch of his skin that was not covered in blood.

"You did it baby, Leah went to get the doctor." Jake's eyes looked dim, like the light on his eyes was slowly fading. He coughed violently and a stream of blood gushed out of his mouth, bathing my hand that was cupping his cheek.

"Seth…. you're …safe…." Blood was flowing from his mouth and his nose making him choke.

"You did it Jake, you protected me."

"Seth …. I love you…" A terrible convulsion wracked his body leaving him limp on the ground.

"Jake … I love you too." It was the first time I made such and admission, I wished it would've been under different circumstances but he heard me, he had to hear me. Suddenly my whole body shook in pain and a strange tightness invaded my chest. I thought it was a result of my injuries but then I noticed…. the silence… the deafening silence. The sound that I cherished more than anything was not there anymore, Jake's heart was not beating.

The body of my mate laid still, the man that taught me how to love was no more. But now his motionless form laid cold, spiritless; his lips would never again produce any sound, his soulless eyes fixed in an undetermined spot. His strong arms limp beside him, never again to hold me, the evidence of his brave battle carved on the multiple wounds on his body.

"Seth, he is gone, our brother is gone." It was Sam's voice next to me but I felt it like he was a mile away. I was not in this moment in space, the pain was too immense. No, I refused to let him go, even if I had to pull him from the clutches of death to get him back, I would.

"NO NO NO MY JAKE IS NOT GONE!"

I refused to even consider the possibility, he just fainted because of the effort or maybe he was asleep. Yes that was it, he was sleeping! I just couldn't hear his heartbeat, because of all the noise around us. Maybe it was me who was asleep; I was trapped inside a cruel nightmare. My sobbing changed to uncontrollable loud cries and screams, the pain in my soul becoming insupportable.

"Seth please you'll aggravate your injuries, calm down!" I refused to let Sam console me, if I did that it would mean that I was accepting this twisted and cruel fate.

I prayed like I haven't in years, I bargained with God, I would do anything to hear his heartbeat going strong again. To get the chance to tell him I loved him every single day for the rest of our lives, to feel the warmth of his body and see him gazing at me lovingly.

"JAKE PLESE COME BACK TO ME, PLEASE, OH GOD NOOOOOOO… JAAAAAAAAKE!


	29. Chapter 29 The greatest of these is love

**I'm baaaaaack! I hope you all have a fantastic 2012.**

**Sorry I made you all wait so long, especially considering the cliffhanger. Thank you to all the readers, especially to those of you who wrote all the amazing reviews, you will never know how much your words mean to me.**

**Disclaimer: I don't own Twilight or any of its characters, they belong to Stephenie Meyer.**

Chapter 29 The greatest of these is love

"JAKE YOU CAN NOT LEAVE ME, I LOVE YOU, COME BACK TO ME!" My Jake couldn't be gone; I wanted to believe this was all a bad dream. Pretend that I was going to wake up and find warm arms around me and those beautiful brown orbs looking at me lovingly. All I wanted was to hear his voice whispering sweet nothings in my ear while holding me close to him. I needed to feel the warmth emanating from his body and filling me with life, to inhale his wonderful scent which by itself was able to make me feel that regardless of the circumstances, everything was going to be fine.

But I was not asleep, this was not a bad dream, this was a nightmare with no hope of relief, I would never wake up from it. As I stared at the lifeless body of the man I loved, a desperate sob escaped my throat, a cold unrelenting pain piercing my very soul, it hurt so much and how could this be? I will never again be protected by his embrace; he will never look lovingly at me. I will never hear his voice again, damn it! how many times he told me he loved me and waited to hear the same words come out of my mouth, but I never allowed myself to give him such joy. He didn't deserve this end, he gave his life for me and I didn't deserve it. I never loved him like he needed to be loved, like he deserved to be loved. No no no no I couldn't accept this; he was the love of my life, the only one for me, my perfect mate.

"Don't you dare take him, he is mine!" I was challenging death, even death needed to know he was mine only mine. I wouldn't accept it, I couldn't accept it, I refused to let him go. Sitting next to him I started to punch his chest and scream in pain and anger. I needed to hear his heart; I needed to make his heart beat again. I frantically alternated between banging his chest and sealing his mouth with mine and breathing enough air into him to make his chest rise. I didn't know where any of my pack mates where at that moment; I was alone in the world in my desperate attempt to revive Jake.

I could see the blood flowing freely from the wound on my shoulder, it was making my hand slippery as I was pushing into Jake's chest; my blood was covering his chest mixing with his own blood teeming from his multiple injuries. The rage in my soul was boiling over as I witnessed what these monsters did. My wolf was howling in pain and anger demanding revenge, but I didn't have time to think about that, my main focus was to revive Jake.

Sam kneeled beside Jake across from me; he took over doing chest compressions while I tried to breathe life into him. I wouldn't give up, we needed to try everything, I would trade places with him if I could.

"Please baby, I beg you, come back to me, please Jake listen to my voice come back, I love you, I need you." I stopped breathing into his mouth for a few seconds to beg him to come back to me, to make him listen to my voice and follow it. I was whispering in his ear, enticing him with my warm breath like I had done many times before.

"Jake come back to me, you can do it, don't leave me please I beg you." I was so concentrated trying to help him that I missed it; I missed the most wonderful sound in the world.

"Seth stop, listen!" Sam alerted me and I stopped everything I was doing to listen. There it was! The sound of his heartbeat, it was very weak but it was there and that was all that mattered. I started kissing his cheeks and his lips, thanking him for staying with me.

"Leah says the doctor is on his way." I turned to the left to see Embry standing next to me watching us.

"We need to take him to the house; the doctor will be able to take better care of him there. Embry, phase and tell Leah to bring an old door that's in Jake's garage, we need something to carry him without aggravating his injuries."

"Paul, Jared, Brady and Quil, take these bastards to Jake's garage and keep them there until we figure out what to do with them. Put chains around their necks so they cannot risk phasing and choking to death, even though they would be doing us a favor if they did. Paul… don't kill them" Paul nodded in agreement but I could see in his eyes the hate and need for revenge.

I watched as Paul and the others left pushing along Rex and Donovan, I had to focus on Jake at that moment, because what I wanted was to break every bone of their miserable bodies and feel their flesh ripping under my teeth. I would deal with them as soon as Jake was out of danger.

"Jake, baby we're going to help you, stay strong, we need to move you and is going to hurt but the doctor is waiting for you and he will give you something to make the pain go away." I needed to comfort him, I didn't know if he could hear me, but in my heart I felt that my words would get through.

Leah arrived with the door and when I tried to stand up I was painfully reminded of my broken leg. "Ahhgh shit! My leg hurts like crazy!"

"Seth, your leg looks really bad it's twisted and the bone is almost pushing through your skin, if you put any weight on it the bone will break through. Let me and Embry carry Jake back to the house and Leah will carry you. Everything will be fine, don't worry and stay still so you don't exacerbate your injuries" Sam wanted to sound confident but I could sense the concern in his voice.

We started our slow procession towards the house. Thankfully, Jake was unconscious; at least he was not aware of his pain. Me, on the other hand, had to let out a few yelps as the pain coming from my injuries was excruciating.

As we approached Jake's house I could sense the sadness and the uncertainty that permeated the air. Billy was in the back yard waiting, worry etched deep into his face, the lines that old age formed on his face temporarily substituted with lines of pain. Emily was beside him holding his hand to comfort him. Sam carefully picked up Jake from the door to get him in the house; he took him to Billy's room because it was the only one on the main floor. Leah brought me inside and walked to the living room to place me on the sofa.

"No, I need to stay with Jake, take me to the room with him."

"Seth you're hurt, you need to stay still and rest, so your healing will pick up." Leah's voice was laced with concern, I appreciated it but I was not going to be kept apart from Jake.

"I don't care Leah, my place is beside him, take me to him now!" Surprisingly, Leah took me to the bedroom without hesitation or any argument.

She placed me on the bed next to him, the pain was unbearable but it was not half as bad as the pain I felt watching Jake lay still, covered in cuts and bruises, his legs twisted in an odd shape and his left arm broken to the point that the bone was poking through the skin. He was willing to give his life to protect me; it was the ultimate proof of his love and devotion. I felt the warm tears roll down my cheeks like the rain that constantly covered our little piece of the world.

The doctor arrived accompanied by his wife Naomi, who happened to be a nurse. When they entered the room they couldn't help the gasp that escaped their lips at the sight in front of them. The condition of Jake's body was a testament of the destructive power of evil. Dr. Barnard the reservation doctor was well aware of our existence and our secret, but nothing could've prepared him for what was in front of him. I couldn't help the growl that escaped my lips when I saw the doctor begin his assessment, in my head I knew he needed to examine Jake, but my instincts were against anybody touching what was mine.

"Seth, I need to examine Jake to assess the extent of his injuries. I'm especially worried about any internal damage and bleeding. Will you be so kind and wait in the living room please?" The doctor spoke calmly but he kept shielding his wife and fear was evident in his voice and demeanor.

"I need to be with Jake." I answered curtly, feeling my jaw tense because of all the contained aggression.

"It will only be for a little while, please Seth, we are wasting precious time." I looked at my mate and back at the doctor, he was right we were wasting time.

"Oh Seth, your leg! I was so focused on Jake that didn't notice just how hurt you are."

"Don't worry about me doc, take care of Jake."

"But Seth, if we wait too long the bone will set in the wrong place. I also need to take a look at your shoulder, the wounds look very deep."

"I said take care of Jake, his life is in danger and you're not doing anything to help him." I was very irritable and the doctor was pissing me off with his stupid bedside manner.

"Leah can you help me?" Leah came running into the room, I screamed in pain when she picked me up from the bed. The doctor gave me a concerned look before beginning to work on Jake.

She took me to the living room where Emily, Sam and Billy waited nervously. Emily had her head on Sam's shoulder and was crying inconsolably while Sam tried to comfort her. I was sitting on the sofa going over everything that happened this afternoon; it was like a horror movie that I kept playing over and over in my head. I could hear the doctor talking to his wife, he was trying to be quiet but all the wolves could hear them. He kept saying that things didn't look good and a lot of medical jargon I didn't understand. The most frequent words were shock, hypovolemic and massive trauma.

I watched as Naomi crossed the living room avoiding our eyes and without saying anything to any of us, disappearing through the front door, I was not a doctor but I knew that type of behavior was never a good sign. I remembered how frantic the staff of the hospital acted when my parents had the accident that took their lives. Mom arrived to the hospital still alive, but even though they did everything they could, she still died.

The doctor walked out of the room with a somber look etched on his face. "I'm sorry but I have to be truthful, I don't want to get your hopes up. It doesn't look good, he has massive internal injuries from being kicked and/or hit repeatedly, he has four or five broken ribs, his clavicles are also broken but those don't worry me much, they are thin bones and will heal quickly, I already aligned them and wrapped his torso. His legs are a different story. They are broken in more than one place and there is also an open fracture on his left arm. He has several deep lacerations, a concussion and has lost a lot of blood. His breathing is very shallow and his pulse is weak and erratic. This is not a good sign; if his blood pressure gets too low we could lose him. I called the hospital in Forks and they have type specific blood for Jake, he lost a lot of blood and we need to replace the volume, I sent Naomi to get it, it was faster than waiting for the hospital messenger." I could not get my mouth to work to say anything I just observed the doctor in horror stricken amazement wondering what all this meant.

Billy turned towards me, his bloodshot eyes piercing through me. "This is your fault! My son is dying because of you! Jake was happy and normal until you came into his life. Since he imprinted on you, by mistake, he changed; instead of the happy smiling kid he used to be, he changed into an aggressive, brutal stranger. I used to be proud of him, he is the alpha of the pack and the chief of this reservation but you had to change that. Now he believes he is in love with another man, do you know how embarrassing that is? My grandchildren will come out of a man; I would rather not have any grandchildren. But I shouldn't worry about this, by the look of it, my son's future is non-existent, he gave his life for you, I hope you're happy." Billy brought his hands to his face at the same time a chocked sob escaped his lips.

"Billy, with all due respect, you and your prejudices can go to hell! Jake is an amazing man, you have to be blind not to see that. That's probably your problem you're blinded by your ignorance and your hate, you hate me, I'm aware of that, you just pretended to make peace with me for your son's sake. I can't change the way you feel, but I'm not going to sit here and allow you to talk like that about him. You call our mating a mistake, I call it a blessing. Yes he is in love with another man and newsflash…. that man is in love with him too." At this admission I felt the eyes of every person in the room look at me in disbelief.

"You say you're embarrassed of him, after he was the only one to stand by your side after your daughters left you to fend for yourself. He is such an embarrassment that he has lovingly taken care of you since you were chained to that chair. You would rather not have any grandchildren than have them come out of me, well that's your loss; you're the one who will be destined to be a grumpy old man that nobody likes, while other people enjoy the company of your grandchildren. Because let me tell you something, Jake is going to get better and we're going to be very happy together, we'll get married and I'll give him children. We are happy and in love and if you can't see that, you're the one with the problem." I couldn't contain the tears of anger that pooled in my eyes, I would never allow anybody to soil Jake's name, not even his own father. Billy just wheeled himself to the kitchen and hid there.

After witnessing our exchange the doctor approached me with a calm but guarded demeanor. "Seth, I'm going to give you something for the pain, it will also help you relax."

"No doc, I heard you say that you didn't have enough pain medicine, remember I'm also a wolf we have excellent hearing. Save the medicine for Jake, I feel fine; anyway there is nothing you could give me that will make me relax, so don't even try." The doctor understood there was no chance in hell of me taking that medicine; he retreated to the bedroom where Jake was.

"How is he?" Quil and Jared came into the living from the kitchen; they probably came in through the back door. The concern in Quil's voice was very evident, regardless of how Jake felt about him, he still saw him as a friend and brother.

"Things are not looking good guys." Sam looked at me before continuing "We may lose him, his injuries are severe"

"WE WILL NOT LOSE HIM DAMN IT! Stop talking like he doesn't stand a chance! He is stronger than any of us; he is going to make it. If you don't have anything positive to say keep your fucking mouths shut." The look in Sam's face was a mix of incredulity and surprise. I was so fucking angry at Sam for even suggesting that my Jake was not going to survive.

"You two, what are you doing here? I told you to keep an eye on those bastards."

"They are sleeping, well technically they are unconscious Paul wanted a go at them and we didn't stop him, actually we helped him."

"That's ok I guess, but make sure not to get carried away and kill them." If anything happens to Jake that would be my job, to rid the earth of those pests.

"Sure Seth, no problem." Both of them kept looking at me and then at Sam, you would've thought they were in a tennis match. Quil left in the direction of the garage probably to give the others an update about Jake's condition.

"Seth can we try to put this on you, I've said this before and I'll say it again, I'm tired of looking at your dick." Leah was standing in front of me holding a pair of basketball pants. With all the commotion I didn't even realize I was still naked. Sam came over and held my leg while Leah slid the pants over my swollen appendage. It hurt like hell but they were quick and efficient, and in less than a minute I was dressed.

Nobody spoke; we were worried that if we said anything, the nightmare would become real. I lost track of time, I didn't know how much time had passed since the attack. The bite on my shoulder was halfway healed; it was still very sore but didn't bleed anymore. Naomi came back in the house carrying a small cooler with a label that read _biohazard, _and went directly to the bedroom.

After some time the doctor came back out "He is still in what would be considered critical condition but stable, Naomi is supervising the transfusion, she got four pints and ordered four more just in case. I gave Jake enough pain medicine to knock down a horse, so in him it will probably last one or two hours. Seth will you let me take a look at your leg now?"

"It's not necessary doc, focus on Jake, actually I have a question, if he is in critical condition shouldn't we take him to the hospital? No offense to you, but he may need more care than what you can provide here at home. "

"None taken Seth, this is a very delicate matter, if he doesn't improve in a few hours we may need to change the plan of action, but for now I will like to keep him under observation. Once we take him to the hospital the wolf will be out of the bag, literally, they will start questioning his body temperature and healing capacity. Your secret could be exposed to the whole world." This was indeed a big problem but in one thing I was very clear, the priority was to save his life, we would deal with the consequences after he was out of danger.

"Seth, I must insist. Jake is asleep with Naomi watching him. Let me take care of your leg, please."

"Ok doc, go for it" Dr. Barnard kneeled beside the sofa methodically checking the pulse in different parts of the leg, below the break, running his hand carefully over the bruised skin. I had to have several bruises from my fight with Rex; I had not been on so much pain and had so many bruises since…. It didn't matter; Jake was a much different man from that night almost three months ago. I would never forget that horrible night and neither would he, but I knew the incidents that happened that night would never repeat themselves.

"Seth, you're healing very fast, even the bite marks are almost gone. The bone attached itself and it's beginning to heal, but it's in the wrong position, I need to re-break the bone so I can align it correctly and wrap your leg." He stood up and walked towards Sam who was talking with Paul and Jared. I hadn't even noticed when Paul walked in the house, but I didn't care about him, my only concern was the better part of me, who was unconscious in Billy's room.

"I'll be right back Seth." The doctor walked back to the bedroom and Sam walked towards me followed by Jared and Paul.

"Hey little brother, the doctor told me he is going to fix your leg, make it good as new." Sam was a really bad actor; I could see the concern and worry in his eyes. I could've sworn I even smelled his fear.

The doctor came back in the room holding a syringe with a clear liquid. "Ok Seth we're going to send you to la-la land for a little while so we can fix your leg ok? This will sting for just a few seconds and you'll feel dizzy and sleepy right after, if you get nauseous let me know but don't worry, it's a very common side effect." He opened a small package that contained alcohol and started cleaning a small area on my arm.

"Wait a minute; your wife brought back more pain medicine?"

"No Seth, morphine is a controlled substance and the doctor couldn't risk losing his license by signing off so much medicine to somebody who doesn't even work there."

"Then I don't want it, save it for Jake, he needs it a lot more than I do"

"Seth, be reasonable, he has to break the bone; well, actually I will break the bone because the doctor is not strong enough. You need the medicine; I won't do it if you're awake. I can't see you suffer like that" Sam pleadingly argued with me.

"Then Paul will break my leg, he doesn't even like me anyway." I directed my gaze at Paul who was standing behind Sam and next to Jared.

"Sorry Seth, no can do, I may be a hot head and an occasional asshole but I'm not a sadist." Paul spoke matter of fact, he had no intention of helping and I knew Sam wouldn't do it either.

"Then Jared will do it." I looked at Jared who as soon as I finished speaking held his hands up and asked to leave him out of it, he had no intention of breaking my leg and risk setting off Jake's rage. At least somebody had hope that my Jake would get better, thinking of him filled me with courage and determination.

"You three listen to me right now, Sam you'll sit behind me and hold me so I don't trash around too much, Paul you'll break the bone, do it fast and right the first time, Jared, you'll hold my lower half especially my other leg. I will not take the medicine and you three will help the doctor with this, do we understand each other?" I saw the three of them flinch but the reason didn't register with me at the moment.

"Doctor, please tell Paul exactly where he needs to break the bone" The doctor looked at them confused with their willingness to torture me, and so was I, but my suffering was secondary to Jake's well-being and comfort.

Sam sat behind me with his hands around my torso, he asked me to cross my arms in front of me and grabbed the opposite hand with his and gently pulled back effectively immobilizing my upper body. Jared situated himself on the other side and held my left knee with one hand while the other went to my right leg just below the knee. Paul stood beside me listening to the doctor's instructions.

"Seth are you sure about this? I can give you half the dose, it will not make you sleep but will take the edge off." The doctor felt he needed to insist, he didn't know how stubborn I could be.

"Doc I'm not going to say it again, save it for Jake, I don't want it!" I looked directly into his eyes to assure him of my decision.

"Are you ready for this bro?" I nodded in affirmation I was terrified of the pain I was going to experience shortly but I wouldn't even consider the idea of taking something that Jake would need.

"Paul, on three you'll break it where the doctor told you" Paul placed his hands over the deep purple bruise I had on my leg, just the contact with his hand was painful, I didn't even want to think how bad it was going to be, instead concentrated on listening to Jake's breathing. "One, two, three!"

"AHHHHHHHHHHH!…. oh God, please tell me it's over!" the second time around the pain was ten times worse, during the fight the adrenaline helped me manage the pain but now there was absolutely nothing to help me. My vision was blurred with all the tears and I felt the throbbing pain emanating from my leg throughout my whole body.

Sam was still holding me; I thought I was trembling until I realized that the one shaking was Sam. "It's ok little brother, Paul got it, it's a clean break."

Paul ran outside and we could hear him retching, Jared, who was sweating profusely ran after Paul to check on him. The doctor proceeded to wrap my leg tightly with an elastic bandage, it was very sore and even the skin was hurting but it was over, now we could all concentrate on Jake.

I leaned back against the sofa to rest a little and Emily brought me a glass of water with some pills. "Before you say anything it's an anti-inflammatory and the doctor has plenty of these" I thanked her and took the pills.

Billy wheeled himself to where I was "How are you feeling Seth?"

"I'm ok Billy, just worried."

"Seth about what happened, for whatever its worth, I'm sorry, you are right. I'm so overtaken with grief that I lost my head and said things I didn't mean. I love my son; I'm proud of him and I know the only one with a problem is me. I promise that if… when he gets better, I'll make an effort to be more tolerant"

"Thank you Billy, it's very easy to lose our heads in situations like this. I'm sorry for disrespecting you."

Time passed slowly and Jake's condition was not improving, every person that came in the house looked like they were waiting for a blow. We were all afraid of the possibility of losing our alpha, but nobody was more worried than me. I would not only lose my alpha, I would lose my best friend and the love of my life, one that could never be replaced because once a part of your soul dies nothing could ever be the same.

Dr. Barnard called Billy to the living room to talk to us; Billy had been sitting in the kitchen by himself for hours.

"His condition is not improving fast enough; his blood pressure is dangerously low. I did an ultrasound and there is no significant bleeding from any organ; thank goodness you guys were strong enough to haul the machine in here. Surgery it's not an option at this moment, it's just that his injuries were so many and so severe that his body instead of improving, it's shutting down. He slipped into a coma and one by one his organs are shutting down, right now he is having difficulty breathing and I'm afraid it will get worse" This couldn't be happening I just misunderstood, that was it, I couldn't understand the doctor.

"What does that mean doctor? It's going to take him longer to get better than you anticipated?" I asked hopeful that his answer would be affirmative.

"No Seth, it means that Jake…. is dying."

"NO NO NO NO there has to be something you can do, don't let him die!" Because of my screams Quil and Embry came running into the house fearing the worse. Sam held Leah and Emily who were crying hysterically. My mind was a whirlwind of images as my world came crashing down on my feet.

Billy got close to me and grabbed my hands, I was numb with pain. I couldn't wrap my mind around the fact that only hours ago Jake was happy and healthy and now he was dying. "Seth, I never believed you were truly his mate but I need to believe it now, please go to him, if you are really his mate like everybody believes, just your touch and your proximity will help him. Please Seth, he is my only son, help my boy please." Billy's tears rolled down the deep wrinkles on his face, ending up on his lap.

"Embry, please take me to Jake, I need to be with him." He picked me up carefully and carried me to the bedroom where Jake laid on Billy's bed. His face looked ashen, the many cuts and bruises were beginning to fade, something that was surprising because they should've been gone by now. He had a blood pressure cuff on his right forearm while his left arm was tightly wrapped to his torso. His beautiful pink lips looked bluish and dry. Even with the oxygen he was being given, he was breathing fast and with difficulty.

I was determined to not allow death to claim him; this was a journey he was not going to take, not on my watch. Sitting next to him I watched him, trying to figure out what I needed to do. On instinct I placed my hand on his chest while I ran the other through his beautiful hair and talked to him.

"Jake it's me your puppy, you have to get better, fight please don't give up. Billy needs you, the pack needs you and I need you. I love you so much and now I regret not telling you before."

"Remember when you went away after the incident on the cliffs? When I went for a run and ended up finding you. You told me that you live only for me. I'm holding you up to that. You have to live, I need you to live. I can't even begin to imagine how my life would be without you by my side. We share a bond like no other; our souls are one, that's why we lost the capacity to feel emotion when we were separated." I understood now the strength of our bond, there were so many clues from the beginning but I ignored all of them.

"I've loved you for a while now; I can even tell you exactly when I realized I was in love with you. Remember our second date, when we were at the cliffs, at one point I looked at you and you looked so beautiful, your skin shimmered in the moonlight making you look mysterious and dangerous. At that moment I understood what I had been feeling but fear prevented me from accepting it. I'm sorry I never told you this, I've learned my lesson and from now on I'll tell you how much I love you, all the time."

"I'll tell you how much I love you every morning, baby all day; I'll live to love you. You'll never feel alone ever again, I'll be right beside you making you feel loved every second of your life. From now on I want us to sleep together, I want to wrap myself on your body and let your scent and your warmth lull me to sleep."

"You are a very odd individual, you know that? I've never considered myself a big deal, just a short kid with bad hair and a worse attitude. But, since day one you have been calling me beautiful, making me feel special, handsome even. You on the other hand are breathtaking, I hope you realize just how utterly magnificent you are. And still in some crazy twist of fate we ended up together. The morning after I came back to you, when I woke up I took a good look at you and almost attacked you right there. I wanted to kiss you until our lips went numb; I wanted to hear you moan as I touched your sweet spot." I kissed the tips of my pointer and middle finger and gently placed them on his bruised lips.

"If you're not here, who will love me the way only you can? Who will hold me when I have a nightmare? I know we had a very rocky beginning but that can only mean that the rest of our life is going to be fantastic, we can only go up from here. Jake, you taught me the most wonderful lesson, just how much a person is capable of changing. I feel like in the past six months I've grown and matured, but you take the trophy, your journey has been unbelievable. You treat me with respect and consideration, something I never thought possible. You are still very dominating and strong, but to tell you the truth, I like it, just don't let it go to your head, ok?"

"You live for me and from now on I promise I'll live for you too. I'm your priority and you will be mine too. No more holding back, no more doubts and no more distrust. Remember the night we went to the movies and those girls were flirting with you, I never admitted it but I was insanely jealous. Now I see you would've enjoyed hearing me admit that." I felt so much regret; it was gnawing at me like a hungry beast, taking away my peace of mind.

"Jake you have to get better, you are not done on this earth, you still have to claim me. I'm not afraid anymore. I need to trust you; your eyes were sincere when you told me you would never hurt me. Jake I swear that if you make an effort and get better, as soon as we are both strong enough we'll make love. You will have me under your body like you've dreamt so many times. I will give myself to you in body and soul, well in body because you had my soul for a long time now."

"You have to put babies inside my belly. Our pups, can you imagine? You and I running after our kids, trying to keep them out of trouble, playing with them and taking them to the beach. You know what I would like, to go to the forest and phase, only one of us in the beginning so they won't get scared, then run around with them on our backs. Feel their small hands pulling on our fur to steady themselves. I can hear them, their shrieks of joy resonating in our ears, can you hear them Jake?" I could've sworn I saw a slight twinge of a smile on his lips, but it was probably wishful thinking.

"I know you will be the best father ever, probably a little overprotective, but I'll be there to help rein you in. I already decided I want them to call me daddy and you papa, don't even suggest they call me mama because I will chew your balls off, consider yourself warned." I chuckled lightly aware that I would never hurt him physically or emotionally.

"Please baby, come back to me please, please, please."

Naomi never left the room and as I glanced at her I could see she was crying.

"Naomi why are you crying?" If she dared to say it was because of Jake's prognosis, I would kick her out of the room.

"I'm sorry Seth it's that I've never seen a person so much in love, the way you talk to him, the things you say, there is so much emotion and tenderness. Jake is a very lucky man."

"No Naomi, I'm the lucky one. Jake is one in a billion, you won't believe me when I tell you that only six months ago I hated him with every fiber of my being, now I couldn't envision my life without him. If something happens to him I will die too, there will be nothing for me to live for. He crept into my heart and made his nest right in my soul. He did so many things to woo me, some I can't tell you, others were as simple as bringing me flowers and making me my favorite foods. We can talk for hours and never get bored or run out of conversation subjects. We are two pieces of a puzzle that fit into each other perfectly." She just nodded in understanding before checking his blood pressure and pulse.

I talked to him for hours, every once in a while the doctor would come in the room to check on him. Every time I was hopeful that he would say Jake was improving, but that was never the case, he just exchanged worried looks with his wife and left the room.

The only indicator of how much time passed since the attack was the total darkness outside the window being replaced with dark daylight as the heavy rain didn't allow the sun to shine. Today was much cooler and dark; as I looked through the small window in Billy's room I saw the dull grey sky, putting a veil of obscurity over us. I watched the window as the raindrops turned to streaks that slid down towards the base. A funny and random thought came to my mind, pain rhymed with rain while fun rhymed with sun. Unfortunately yesterday had been an exception to this; it started perfect but our perfect Sunday ended up tragically.

Yesterday, like the sand on a windy day, his arms surrounded me, enclosing me in a cocoon of protection and love. I could remember every time he called me beautiful, his laughter and his love. The warmth of his heart was like a summer breeze, it made me feel happy and fulfilled. Now death was trying to take all that away from me. I prayed that this dark ominous day would not turn into the worse day of my life.

Emily and Kim came in the room to bring Naomi and me some breakfast. Naomi gracefully accepted but I couldn't. "Thank you but I'm not hungry" was my only reply, as I kept my watch over Jake. My voice surprised me when I heard how hoarse it sounded, I guessed that's what happened when you spent so many hours talking and crying.

"Seth, you should eat something, you need your strength to heal." Pleaded Kim.

"Thanks Kim, I just can't. I won't be able to eat anything until he does."

"Don't torture yourself, this is not your fault, this could've happened to any of the guys." In my mind I knew I was not responsible for the attack but a small part of me would always wonder what could I have done differently to prevent it.

I didn't pay any more attention to either woman as they left silently. Once outside I heard them airing their concerns about me with somebody. "Don't worry, if it's necessary we'll put an IV in him and give him fluids, that will at least keep him hydrated." I recognized the voice outside the door as Dr. Barnard's. He looked spent when he came in the room to check on Jake.

"Seth he is not improving, but he is not getting worse either. I'm going to leave to take Naomi home and change my clothes. I already called a colleague to cover my shift at the clinic, so I'll be back in about an hour. Please try to eat something and rest, I know you don't want to leave Jake's side, at least lay down next to him. You must be exhausted, you need to rest and get your strength back. When Jake wakes up you're going to have a very cranky mate and will need all your patience to deal with his demands." He was trying to cheer me up and I have to admit that I found very amusing the thought of a cranky Jake acting like a toddler. What he didn't know was that I would gladly take care of each and every demand with nothing but love in my heart.

"Also, judging by what I heard you promise last night, you should get a lot of rest." Naomi interjected, the doc looked at his wife inquisitively and she just gave him a look that read, that's for me to know and for you to find out. She kissed my forehead before leaving with her husband.

As the morning advanced so did the steady stream of visitors, from pack brothers to members of the tribal council. Jake was truly loved and respected in our community. I was grateful that Sam didn't allow anybody to come in the room, neither one of us was up to visitors and especially we didn't need the look of pity in their eyes.

I kept talking to him while touching his gorgeous face, some of the swelling in his face had gone down and he looked more like himself with each passing minute. I was whispering since my throat was hoarse and dry, but I couldn't stop, he needed to be reminded that he belonged with us, that he belonged with me. I felt tired and maneuvering my leg carefully so I wouldn't hit him, I laid down next to him. Placing my head next to his on the pillow I inhaled his scent, but I couldn't recognize it, his scent was different, it was mixed with sweat, blood, dirt and medicines. I hated this! I wanted to smell him, just him, just my Jake.

I felt the despair hit me like an anvil to the chest, those bastards took everything from us and they even took my Jake's scent. I hated them, I wanted to kill them, pretend they were fucking leeches and tear them limb by miserable limb. I wept bitterly with my head on the crook of Jake's neck, the heavy rainclouds in my mind letting loose their turbulent nature.

"Don't… cry." At first, I refused to acknowledge my delusion, I was sure I could hear Jake's voice. But I knew that was impossible, Jake was unconscious.

"P…uppy" Wait, what? There was only one person in the universe that called me puppy, Jake. Sitting up to look at him, I felt my face fall when I saw his eyes were closed, a chocked sob escaping my tortured throat. Leaning over I kissed him gently on the lips, when I pulled back I was sure I could see a faint smile. Was I losing my mind? Maybe this was the way my body was helping me cope with all the pain. I grabbed his free hand and prayed I was not losing my mind, that this was real.

"Jake, if you can really hear me squeeze my hand, even if it's just a little bit." Nothing, no movement.

"Please Jakey, do it for me" at this second request he squeezed my hand weakly.

"Jake baby you're coming back to me, I knew you wouldn't leave me, I love you, I love you, I'll never stop telling you!" I didn't know whether to cry or laugh, I took the hand that I was still holding and covered it in kisses while washing it with my tears. Looking back to his face I saw a solitary tear fall from his eye and wiped it with my thumb.

"You're crying, you must be in pain, I'll tell they guys to call the doctor."

"No." Just by saying this word, he stopped my voice from escaping my lips to alert the others.

"You are not in pain? Then why are you crying?"

"Happy." I understood why he was happy; I confessed my love towards him. By now everybody knew, it was about time he heard me say it.

"I'm happy too Jake, I know you are going to be just fine and we will get our forever next to each other, my love." I saw him grimace in pain and decided to call for help, he needed more pain medicine.

"Can somebody call the doctor please!" I screamed loud enough so anybody who was in the vicinity could hear me. I thought the house would fall apart with the raucous running in the hallway. Sam was the first one to walk through the door followed closely by Leah and Embry; they all looked exhausted with dark circles under their eyes.

"Seth, is everything ok?"

"More than ok Sam, he is awake, but needs more pain medicine." Sam approached us hesitantly and looked over Jake's sleeping form before looking back at me with pity and sadness in his eyes.

"Seth, look at him, he still unconscious."

"Give him a minute; he is coming in and out of consciousness." I knew they didn't believe me, but I was not crazy, Jake talked to me. I decided to prove it to them.

"Jake open your eyes a little bit, some people want to say hello."

"Believe me, he squeezed my hand and everything" Sam tried to grab Jake's hand as to prove to me that what I was describing didn't happened in reality.

"Don't touch him!" I growled at my brother, when were these people going to understand they couldn't touch what was mine.

"Seth I'm sorry, maybe you felt a twitch or someth…. I'll be darn..." I looked from my brother to Jake to see what elicited that response out of him. I felt my heart swell with joy at the sight of Jake's barely opened eyes, but he was alert and looking at me as lovingly as he always did.

"Embry go call the doctor, tell him Jake is awake and needs pain medicine!" Embry left the room immediately, I was getting spoiled, every time I opened my mouth people ran to do what I asked, this was different, good but different.

"Embry is he…" Billy's voice reached us; he was probably worried that Jake wouldn't be with us anymore after I asked for the doctor. "No Billy he is waking up, but he is in pain, he needs medicine."

"Love, do you think you can stay awake long enough so your dad can see you?" He closed his eyes and opened them slowly once, I assumed that by this he meant yes.

"Leah please tell Billy that Jake wants to see him." Leah left the room quickly and I could hear Billy's wheelchair making its way through the hallway. He wheeled himself inside the room. I sat up leaning against the headboard to allow Billy to see Jake from his chair.

"Son, I'm so happy you are awake, you had us so worried!" Billy grabbed the same hand I had been holding earlier and Jake squeezed it harder than I've seen him do it since he woke up. Tears welled in Billy's eyes but this time they were tears of joy.

"Seth you did it son, you brought him back to us." Billy took my hand and placed it on Jake's hand; I intertwined our fingers together trying to hold back the tears that were threatening to escape my eyes. With this simple gesture Billy was giving us his blessing, it was a shame that it took Jake almost dying to convince him we were not an accident, but everything happened exactly when it was supposed to, not one minute before or after.

"I think we should let them rest" intervened Sam and they all walked out of the bedroom.

"I do feel very tired, we should sleep baby" I slid down next to him and turned to my side to face him.

"Welcome back Jake, I love you"

**Well here it is, Seth's love was strong enough to bring Jake back. Click on the rectangle that says review and let me know what you think about this chapter. **


	30. Chapter 30 A New Life

**I want to thank all the readers, the ones that review, the ones that add the story to their favorites and story alerts and to those to give me honor of adding me as your favorite author. **

**This chapter will give you a glimpse at Seth and everything he is feeling, the prospect of a new life with Jake and his position in the pack.**

**In the next chapter you will read everything through Jake's eyes, how he feels regarding Seth and all the new developments with their relationship.**

**Disclaimer: all the characters belong to Stephenie Meyer I just use them to amuse my overactive imagination.**

* * *

><p>Chapter 30 A New Life<p>

My nap was cut short by the doctor coming in the room to check on Jake. I was very excited to give him the good news, my Jake woke up. I expressed my concern about the fact that he kept going in and out of consciousness. Dr. Barnard assured me that was completely normal, many people believed the Hollywood glamorized way of waking up from a coma, in which the person would open their eyes and be fully awake, being able to talk normally and walk. In real life it was very different; it was a slow process in which the body regained control little by little. Thankfully, as a shifter the process would be faster, because I was anxious to see Jake back to normal.

Jake was receiving large doses of morphine and that helped keep him asleep. Unfortunately, because of the extent of his injuries he would need the medicine for a few more days; otherwise the pain from the healing process would be almost as bad as the broken bones themselves. The good news were that his blood pressure was improving and he may not need any more transfusions if his body picked up producing blood cells at our usual accelerated rate.

"Seth, this is nothing short of a miracle, yesterday when I got here I was sure Jake would not see the next morning. Naomi told me about the way you talked to him, how you kept reminding him that he needed to stay with you and how much you loved him. She wouldn't go into some details because they were too intimate, my Naomi is very discreet. But I could see the admiration she felt about your relationship, she was beaming when she spoke about your commitment to Jake and the strength of your love. She told me that if there was ever a couple who could be victorious over death, it was you guys." I had to agree with the doctor, even if death would've claimed Jake last night, we would still be together, because I would follow him.

"Doc my Jake is very strong; his alpha wolf can only reside in somebody with amazing outer and inner strength. I just made sure to remind him he needed to stay with us; we all need him, especially me." I didn't see this admission as a sign of weakness, if I learned anything from this experience was that speaking of what's in your heart takes courage. To remain silent and hide your feelings was the biggest sign of weakness and cowardice and at the end it would lead to pain and regret. I couldn't live a lie anymore; Seth Clearwater was in love with Jacob Black and will be for the rest of his life. Having the support of all our family and friends, especially now that Billy was coming around, was a big blessing, but I knew that it wouldn't make a different to either one of us if the situation was different.

"Seth, don't sell yourself short and don't underestimate the power of true love. There is no stronger force in the universe than the love between two soul-mates, look at you guys, Jake was almost gone and you managed to rescue him from death's grip." The doctor's words made me think about all the times I rejected our bond; all the times I rejected Jake. I was not only denying him my love, I was denying us our future. I guessed everything happened the way it needed to happen, life was not just about the good happy times, sometimes the journey was just as important as the end point.

"I went to the clinic and picked up more morphine, now got enough for both of you, no arguing. You need to rest." He gave me a stern look that was meant to be intimidating.

"If there is enough for him, I will take some; my leg has not stopped throbbing since you reduced the fracture and realigned the bones." He cleaned my arm with alcohol and injected me with a clear liquid that stung as it was going in.

"The fracture was pretty severe, you were very brave yesterday. I've seen bigger men crumble to nothing from less pain that what you endured." The doctor checked my blood pressure and my pulse first, then Jake's.

"I just concentrated on Jake's breathing, it helped me, gave me strength and courage. If he was able to withstand such a brutal attack until he made sure I was safe, I could deal with the pain of one broken bone." My eyelids started to feel very heavy; it was getting harder and harder to keep my eyes open.

"Have a nice nap Seth, you earned it." The doctor's voice was the last thing I heard before drifting off to dreamland.

It was probably mid- afternoon when I woke up, the aroma of dinner permeated throughout the house making my stomach grumble loudly. I noticed that now I had an IV on the back of my right hand, the tube went to a bag that read saline solution. The doctor probably put the IV in as soon as the morphine made me fall asleep. The bag was almost empty and most of the liquid ended up in my bladder. I tried to stand up but felt very dizzy and had to sit back on the bed, the whole room was spinning. I was definitely not going to be able to hop on one leg to the bathroom while feeling so groggy.

"Sam, Leah!" I called loud enough so they would hear me, but quiet enough so I wouldn't wake up Jake. I expected either one of my siblings to walk through the door, but instead no other than Quil came in the room, he gasped slightly when he took a glimpse Jake's appearance.

"Wow he still looks like shit after healing for one whole day, I couldn't see him yesterday from where I was standing, but I don't even want to imagine how he looked." He moved his gaze towards me, apparently remembering the reason he came in the room to begin with. "Sorry Seth, can I help you? Leah is on patrol and Sam went to his house to get some clothes and other things Emily needs, nobody wants to leave the house until we are certain that you two are getting better."

"Well that's a problem, I need to get to the bathroom but the morphine the doctor gave me is making me very dizzy. I'm afraid that if I try to hop there I might fall and believe me I don't want to break my leg again, twice is two times too many."

"That's not a problem, I can carry you." I had to decide whether or not to tell him the reason I didn't want him to touch me. If Jake smelled Quil's scent on me he wouldn't like it one bit and his peace of mind was more important to me than my pack brothers' feelings, but I didn't want to hurt Quil either, I needed to be diplomatic.

"Thank you Quil, but Jake wouldn't approve of anybody touching me except my brother or sister." I told him something that was completely true, just leaving out the tiny detail about Jake's jealousy towards him. I wanted to spare his feelings, he was in enough pain because of the situation with Paul and I didn't need to rub salt on the wound.

"Neither one of them will be back for at least one hour, can you hold it?" Quil understood perfectly, for months he had been a witness to Jake obsessive behavior, he knew how my mate felt about me.

"I don't think so." I was feeling more uncomfortable with every passing minute, my lower abdomen feeling bloated and sensitive, the pressure threatening to turn me into an open dam.

"I guess Jake will either have to deal with your scent on me or with sleeping on a wet bed." I chuckled internally while deciding what would be best for both of us. Making my decision I raised my arms and Quil understood my gesture and picked me up. He took me to the bathroom and stepped outside while I relieved myself. After I was done, Quil brought me back to the room and helped me get back on bed. Without saying anything else he turned around and walked toward the door.

After Quil exited the room I snuggled next to Jake, his soft snores lulling me to sleep. I could hear the rain hitting the side of the house and what seemed to be thunder at a distance, but there could be a hurricane outside and I wouldn't care, I was safe, as long as Jake was by my side, I had nothing to fear.

I woke up some time later to find Jake's hand on top of mine over his chest, with our fingers interlaced. He probably woke up at some point to find me sleeping next to him and placed his hand over the one that I had permanently perched on the vast spans of his chest. I turned when I felt somebody's eyes on me and found Naomi watching us from one the corners in Billy's room.

"How do you feel Seth?" Her sweet motherly voice reached me.

"Better, that medicine is good, but makes me too groggy."

Naomi approached me and checked my blood pressure and pulse, writing everything in a chart "You are also weak; you haven't had anything to eat or drink since yesterday. I'm going to tell Emily to fix you a plate and you will eat it, doctors' orders." She gave a stern look that made her look very much like her husband. Some people say that as the years pass couples begin to look alike, does that mean I'm going to start looking like Jake? God I hope so.

"What about Jake? Is he going to get dinner also?" He usually ate way more than I did; if I was hungry, by now he must be famished.

"Not right now, he will be asleep a little bit longer; when he wakes up I'll give him some broth and see how he tolerates it. If it will make you feel better I'll ask Sam to bring you to the living room and you can eat there." I nodded affirmatively and she walked outside of the room only to come back a minute later with Sam in tow.

"C'mon little brother, let's get some food into you." Sam carefully picked me up, bringing me to the living room and finally setting me down on the living room sofa. Emily brought me a steaming bowl of soup and sat next to me with the clear intention of feeding me.

"Emily thanks but I can feed myself."

"Just humor me Seth, please; I've been so worried for both of you, feeling so impotent. Let me do this for you." I couldn't say no to her plea and opened my mouth for her to spoon some of her delicious confection in my mouth. I didn't realized just how hungry I was until I started eating, finishing the whole bowl in a few minutes.

"Thanks Emily, it was delicious." She stood up to bring the plate to the kitchen, when she came back she had a plate full of chocolate chip cookies.

"I'm sorry I didn't bake these, but they were in the pantry." I couldn't hold back the sob that escaped my lips.

"What's wrong Seth? Are you in pain? Let me get the nurse." Emily asked concern evident in her voice and expression.

"It's not necessary Emily; it's just that Jake got these cookies for me. He knows they are my favorite, so he always keeps the pantry stocked with them. He did so many nice things for me and I … didn't appreciate it." The wave of regret hit me like a tsunami, so many memories. I had been so ungrateful always focusing on the negative, second guessing myself and not trusting him.

I wiped the tears from my face when I saw Paul and Embry come in the house, they also looked exhausted.

"Hey Seth, how are you feeling." Embry greeted me with a tired and worried look on his face.

"I'm better thanks, sit down; we need to talk." They surprised me when they plumped themselves on the floor next to me.

"Seth man, can you take it down a notch with the alpha commands, you are very bossy." Paul's complain caught me completely by surprise, I had no idea I've been giving alpha commands. No wonder everybody was doing what I said without any arguing. This alpha thing was some very powerful mojo.

"Sorry guys, I had no idea, I'm not doing it on purpose, but I don't know how to turn it off. I guess you'll have to endure it a little bit longer, until I learn how to use it or Jake gets better, whatever happens first." They both nodded in understanding.

"Tell me, what's the status of our guests?" I made air quotes on the word "guests".

"Well, they won't tell us anything, they just keep throwing empty threats." Answered Paul and I could see the anger that was boiling just beneath the surface.

"What are we going to do with those idiots?" Embry was hungry for revenge and to see him be so open about his obvious hate towards Rex and Donovan was very out of character. When he asked that question I knew exactly how he felt, he wanted blood.

"I think we should take care of them quietly, I doubt anybody misses those bastards." Paul was determined to take care of them himself, but I couldn't let him do it.

"No Paul, nobody is going to hurt these guys, there is nothing I want more right now than to go out there and kill them slowly, breaking their bones like they did to Jake. But I'm not going to do it and neither will you. It's one thing to kill one of the bloodsuckers, they are already dead and you are just finishing the job. It's something entirely different to stop a beating heart." I didn't want any of them to experience taking a life the way I did; sure, it was in self-defense and I was protecting my soul-mate, but it was still murder. This was something that would change me, his cry, the taste of blood in my mouth and the sound of his heart at it withered and died was something that I would never forget, something that would be engraved in my very soul for the rest of my life.

Billy's gravelly voice interrupted my internal monologue and I had to make myself stop and listen to him. "I think we should let the council take care of it, contact their reservation. That is, if they are really from the Awani tribe. We'll go from there."

"Do you agree with this Seth?" Billy directed his question at me and I realized that at this moment I was the alpha of the pack, with all the responsibilities and duties it entailed.

"I agree. Billy, can you take care of that?"

"Sure Seth I'll talk to the council." He wheeled himself back to the kitchen to use the phone.

"Guys I know you are all tired but in addition to the normal patrols two of you have to stay with Rex and Donovan at all times, make no mistake, they are dangerous"

"Don't worry about any of that Seth; we're taking care of them, we tied a thick chain around their necks and if they tried to phase they will choke before they get a chance to break the chain." Answered Paul smugly.

"I must insist, don't underestimate them, they even consider themselves predators."

"Predators? Those bastards! Is idiots like those who give us a bad name and feed fairy tales about us." Embry surprised me again; I didn't even remember hearing him swear before. Jacob and Embry had been best friends for a long time and it was obvious that the whole incident had and was still affecting him deeply.

At that moment I saw Naomi come out of the bedroom and walk in our direction. "Excuse me Seth, Jacob woke up and is a little agitated because you were not by his side, I explained to him you were having dinner but I don't think he believed me."

"Sam, can you take me back to the bedroom, please?" Sam came over swiftly and picked me up." By the way, did I give another alpha command or did I use my normal voice?"

"It was a command Seth, don't worry it's very hard in the beginning, I know." I just nodded and felt my heart swell with joy when I saw Jake's beautiful brown eyes, looking at me like I was a life saver and he was a drowning man.

"Seth" He extended his right arm towards me shakily, trying to touch me even before Sam placed me on the bed. Jake needed to touch me, to feel the warmth of my skin, to feed from the energy that cursed through our bodies whenever we touched.

"Don't be alarmed I'm back, I'm here next to you, exactly where I'll be for the rest of our lives my love." Jake gave me the biggest smile he could, considering the painful state of his face, he looked so beautiful even if it was a half-smile, half-grimace, it was a reminder of everything that he was. He was my personal sun, who with his contagious smile was capable of illuminating the entire universe and give reason to my existence. My best friend; the one who knew everything about me and never judged me. Quite the contrary understood me better than I understood myself sometimes and was capable of seeing potential in me that I could never see. The person who loved me more than his own life, he was willing to give his life to protect me and keep me safe.

I didn't even noticed if Sam left the room, I just sat next to Jake holding his hand and giving him gentle kisses on his multiple bruises. I wanted to kiss all of them away, to erase this bad memory from our brain forever. But in a crazy and twisted way this horrible experience drew us closer, allowing me to let go of my fears and my doubts. I needed to feel what real fear felt like, so I wouldn't be afraid anymore.

Because of this nightmare I learned that being a submissive did not mean that you were weak or unworthy. Quite the opposite, it took a lot of strength and courage to love, protect and carry the children of your dominant. I may have been considered by some a weakling, but I was still able to kill an alpha wolf. Everybody has tools that help them succeed and shine; I had my speed and my love for Jake. I was able to put them to use when it was most needed.

Naomi walked in carrying a small coffee mug with a straw on it. "Here we go Jacob, this is just some clear broth, if you tolerate it well, in a few hours I'll give you something else." Jake seemed very disinterested on the food for the first time since I've known him. He basically looked from Naomi back to me without saying anything; Jake turning down some food was completely out of character.

"May I have it? I can help; he will eat for me, right Jake?" I grabbed the cup and placed the straw on the corner of Jake's mouth. It must be uncomfortable to drink while laying down, but the doctor didn't want to move him for at least forty eight hours. He took a short sip and swallowed it with difficulty, but at least he was eating something and that would definitely help him heal faster. It took a while but he drank the whole cup and I rewarded him with a gentle kiss, he whimpered a little probably wanting more but I didn't want to hurt his already bruised lips.

This had been the longest he had been awake since the attack, he traced with his hand the bite marks on my shoulder and tensed in anger. "None of that Jake, this is nothing compared to what you went through."

"You should've stayed away." His gravelly voice reached my ears as a reproach and a warning. I knew that sooner or later he was going to give me a hard time for disobeying the order he gave me.

"I couldn't let them kill you Jake, you're my mate and I love you." My declaration disarmed him effectively defusing any attempt to start a confrontation. He gave me another sweet smile, I loved his smile.

"Say it again." He demanded.

"Say what love?" I knew exactly what he wanted me to say but decided to play a little.

"That you love me." His voice sounded like a whimper, begging me to declare my love for him. He was afraid, affected by the usual insecurity that tormented imprints.

"I love you, I love you, I love you, I love you, I love you, I love you. I'll never get tired of telling you how much I love you Jake. I almost lost the chance to let you hear me say it and…" I couldn't continue when a sob made me choke on my words. I allowed myself to cry for what I almost lost, in a mixture of sadness and joy. Sadness for all my mistakes, for rejecting him, for denying us a chance at happiness. Joy for the chance to redeem myself that life was giving me. I felt Jake's trembling finger on my face, swiping away the salty tears that were forcing themselves out of my red rimmed eyes. Grabbing his hand I kissed it, just like I had done several times before, I was afraid of touching any other part of his body since his gorgeous god-like body had been turned into a map of cuts and bruises.

"Don't cry my puppy, I'm ok." Even now after everything that happened he was still trying to take care of me.

Dr. Barnard came in the room and proceeded to prepare two syringes with what I presumed was our pain medicine. Jake watched him intently, trying to decipher what he was doing. "Ok guys, you must be ready for some relief, you are both very strong and manage your pain very well, better than most. But there is relief available, you don't have to be in pain, right Seth?' the doctor arched and eyebrow and gave me a menacingly look. He approached me first, when he was cleaning my arm Jake stretched his long arm and held him.

"How hurt is Seth?" he directed the question at the doctor and even though I rather not tell Jake, I felt it was unavoidable and I was not going to lie to him or tell the doctor to lie for me. I nodded affirmatively letting the doctor know he could inform Jake of the extent of my injuries.

"Seth's arm and shoulder had deep lacerations that are almost healed by now but his left leg was badly broken, the good news is that it is healing beautifully." Jake's hand shook before squeezing my hand gently, his jaw was tense, his eyes inundated with tears that were threatening so escape from his eyes.

Placing my hand on his chest I made him look at me in the eye. "Baby I'm fine, trust me please." He weakly tried to slam his fist against the bed, in anger and frustration.

"Jake I'll have none of that, I couldn't escape unscathed from this. I needed some battle scars. I'll wear any scar from this experience with pride knowing that I was able to protect you, the same way you've been protecting me for months."

"But I failed." He berated himself for being unable to protect me, angry tears rolling down his temples and ending up pooling around his ears.

"I think that concussion has affected you more than we thought. If you had failed, neither one of us would be alive right now." I needed to make him see that his act of heroism saved both our lives.

"Jake if I may put my two cents in, I agree with Seth, looking at the guys who attacked you, it's a miracle you're here with us. Your courage and strength were key factors in your survival. No more discussions, it's time for both of you to rest." He injected me with the same liquid as the day before and he repeated the same action with Jake. After a few minutes we were both drifting into sleep.

To my surprise the next morning Jake woke up before I did and he looked a lot better. Most of the swelling on his face had gone down and even though he was still covered in yellow-green bruises and had deep dark circles under his eyes he looked breathtaking. I couldn't take my eyes away from his strong profile.

"Good morning Seth, how are you feeling this morning?" Jake turned his head towards me and I propped myself on one arm and kissed him on the cheek before answering Naomi.

"I feel good thank you, did you sleep well baby?" I directed my question to Jake who just like me stopped paying attention to the nurse and was looking directly at me.

"You two are just too cute, but I need to finish Jake… Jake!" he wouldn't answer her, he was lost into me, looking into my eyes with a love and devotion I didn't deserve, while tracing my lips with his index finger. I held his hand and kissed the palm of his hand before playfully biting his index finger. I cringed when he let out a small laugh laced with pain.

"Jake, just a few more questions, in a scale from one to ten, one being no pain and ten being the worse pain you have ever experienced, how is your pain level today?" Naomi took a very serious and professional tone to let us know she meant business and was not going to be ignored.

"It's a six or seven." I didn't realize Jake was in so much pain, if this was now, yesterday it must had been close to nine or even ten.

"Today the doctor will probably cut down on the amount of morphine, that way you'll be able to stay awake longer, also you need to be weaned you off that strong medicine." I watched as Naomi took out of a cloth bag several white plastic bags and started lining them up on the bed.

"What's that Naomi?" I asked genuinely curious.

"I'm going to give Jake a bath; you're both still covered in mud and blood. Jake cannot be moved yet but I'll do my best to help him feel a little bit more comfortable. Seth I brought some crutches for you, that way you don't have to depend on anybody carrying you. If you want to take a shower I'll remove the bandage you have on your leg, the swelling is going down fast and it needs to be tightened anyway, just make sure not to put any weight on your leg." A shower sounded really good, I had been so worried about Jake that I completely forgot about me.

Naomi left the room and came back after a few minutes holding several towels and accompanied by Brady who was carrying a bucket, with what I guessed by the steam coming off it, warm water. She thanked Brady, who left the room quickly but not before giving a sympathetic glance in our direction. Naomi then submerged the bags she previously aligned on the bed, in the warm water. She motioned to remove the thin bed sheet that covered Jake but stopped abruptly looking at me with wide eyes.

Her reaction made me realize I was growling loudly at her, even Jake was looking at me with a disconcerted look on his face. I was sitting up on the bed almost ready to attack the woman who had been diligently taking care of us for two days. But I couldn't help it, the idea of her bathing Jake sent me into a spiral of jealousy, insecurity and anger that scared even me.

"Tell me how to do it and I'll bathe him, I don't want you or anybody else touching him." My tone was very demanding and so assertive it was almost rude.

I felt Jake's hand on my arm and the warmth of his touch made me look at him. "Baby calm down, you're scaring her." He was right I didn't understand why I was acting in such an aggressive way but it was like my brain was giving orders to my body without my consent. I made a conscious effort to control my anger and act like Seth, not like a crazed jealous maniac.

"I'm sorry Naomi; I didn't mean to scare you. I don't understand what's happening to me, you've done nothing wrong. Since the attack I've felt this intense need to protect Jake and can't stand the idea of anybody touching him." I felt confused and embarrassed, according to what I had been told I was acting like an alpha, giving orders and taking charge of the situation, but I had no idea how deeply it was affecting me.

"Seth maybe now you'll understand me better, this is how I feel about you. It was not me being an asshole; it was something beyond my control." Jake's words were merely a whisper but they spoke volumes. So many things were becoming clear to me, the intense need to protect, the insecurity, the jealousy... FUCK! Did I imprint on Jake? It was not possible; first Jay said I couldn't imprint and second I saw and felt the imprinting process through Sam's memories and I hadn't felt anything like that, not even close.

I decided it was probably the alpha wolf dominating my thoughts and my behavior, the same way she gave me the double timbre of the alpha voice, she intensified my feelings giving me a glimpse at some of the torture Jake had to endure the last few months. But this made me even more confused, she had always been the voice of reason within me, now she was making me act almost on instinct.

"Seth, Seth baby your mind is a thousand miles away." Jake's voice brought me back to Billy's room and the situation at hand.

"Sorry love, I'm ok." I leaned forward and gave Jake a reassuring kiss on the lips.

"Naomi how do I do this, where do I start?" I controlled my tone making a conscious effort to sound normal.

"Seth, turn around so you can be more comfortable." While I did this, she came around placing the bucket on a chair next to me. "In each of this pouches you'll find an antiseptic towel, they are pretty much like soap but don't need to be rinsed, even though I always rinse it with a damp towel because it helps the patients feel cleaner. Use as many as you need, discard them when they get dirty. Is it ok if I stay in the room while you do it in case you need help?"

"Sure, I'll ask you to step outside when I'm ready to clean his private parts, that's only for me to see." I felt my face get warmer and Jake had an adorable blushing that was visible even under all the bruises, adding maroon to the different colors on his face. In my mind I knew it was stupid, she had been taking care of him for two days now and probably saw him more than once, but I didn't like it and it was not going to happen while I was in the room.

"Sure Seth" I'll be over there if you need me" she walked toward the window accommodating herself on the windowsill.

"Are you ready for your bath Jakey?" I wiggled my eyebrows action that made him chuckle heartily while nodding affirmatively.

With Naomi guiding me, I placed a towel under his head and opened the biggest pouch which contained something that resembled a shower cap. I placed it on his head and began massaging his scalp, trying to clean off as much blood and dirt as I could without hurting him.

"I think it's a good idea to call the pack so they can see how dashing you look right now Mr. Alpha, don't you think?" Jake gave me a stern look before answering.

"Don't you dare, I'll never hear the end of it"

"You're right, I guess they'll have to wait until I phase and then I'll show them, it'll be fun" It was very amusing to see Jake so worried about the pack teasing him

"Seth, you think you're so funny, you do that and I'll make you pay for it." These words brought back a wave of bad memories that flooded my being like the murky waters of a stagnant pond.

"Don't threaten me!" I was done with being manipulated with threats, which had to be left in the past. I would never allow Jake to treat me that way ever again.

"I'm sorry Seth; I was joking, calm down please." Jake pleaded.

"Apology accepted." I smiled and winked an eye to put him at ease.

Removing the shower cap I tossed it aside and wrapped his head with the towel. Then I took a clean antiseptic towel and gently cleaned his face, neck and torso. Every once in a while he would wince when I exerted more pressure than his sore skin could handle. I fought to hold back a sob that was threatening to escape my throat as I uncovered cut after cut and bite after bite. Regardless of how small was the portion of skin I wiped I always found a cut, a bruise or a bite. My love's body had been turned into a map of scars and lesions.

Soon enough I had cleaned the best I could his upper body, now was the fun part. "Naomi can you please step outside, I'll call you if I need any help." As soon as she closed the door I peeled off the bed sheet that was covering Jake's lower body. I stopped to admire his body; even after all the abuse he endured he was still magnificent. Looking at him I felt a fire that started in my groin and wildly spread through my whole body.

For the first time in my life I felt a desperate need to feel his hands all over my body, to touch him in the most intimate way. I felt the burning pain of lust emanating from deep within my body, making me hard in an instant. I wanted… no, I needed, to feel him inside me. To feel the weight of his body on me as he thrusts again and again, burying himself deep within me, making me scream the name of my dominant. I placed my hand on his semi-erect cock and felt a surge of what I could only describe as electricity. Burying my hand inside my shorts I grabbed my painfully hard cock, wrapped my fingers around it and ran them up and down its length, shuddering in pleasure.

"Seth… Sethy, baby are you ok?" He gasped when I opened my eyes to look at him, I didn't know the reason for his reaction but I did know how I felt. It was something I never felt before, something primal, animalistic. I struggled to keep my hands off him, knowing he was in no condition for a sexual encounter. I wanted him desperately but loved him enough to know I needed to wait.

"My love, how long I wanted to see you look at me that way." His heart was racing; he spoke slowly while gently rubbing my leg.

"What do you mean Jake?" It was a monumental effort to keep myself from jumping Jake, if only he knew how hard this was for me, even though I had hunch he knew.

"You … you want me." He was hesitant, my only guess was that he wished for that to be true, but was afraid of hearing otherwise.

"Yes I do." I felt very self-conscious and flustered at this admission, it was Jake, I shouldn't feel embarrassed at all, but I couldn't help it, this was all so new to me. Jake was the first person I ever wanted, sexually speaking that is. The smile on his face melted my heart; he looked happy, peaceful, with the certainty of one who knows he is loved and needed.

"I am yours forever." The emotion on Jake's voice far superior at expressing his love than any word.

"I am yours forever." I repeated his words, letting Jake feel the emotion that accompanied my declaration the same way I felt his.

* * *

><p><strong>I always love to read your feedback, if you have any comments or questions press review and let me know.<strong>


	31. Chapter 31 Brotherhood

**Here is the new chapter; it will be mostly in Jake's POV. **

**I want to thank all the readers, especially those that reviewed. One reviewer kindly pointed out a big inconsistency between chapter 1 and later chapters. Today I went back and re-wrote the final part of that chapter hopefully fixing the problem. I still have another one to fix, but I wanted to get this chapter out and that one was taking me longer to find, it's related to Seth's phone and it was pointed out a while ago. I apologize for both. **

**Disclaimer: I do not own Twilight, its plot or any of its characters.**

Chapter 31 Brotherhood

Seth POV

After finishing Jake's bath, I placed a clean bed sheet on him. I needed to call Naomi back in the room; I made quite a mess but it was hard to bend forward to clean up, while balancing on one leg. I took my crutches and slowly made my way to the door. "I'll be back in a little while; I'm going to take a shower" I announced, while looking over my shoulder in true Jacob style, laughing quietly at the absurdity of the situation, the reversal of roles that's been taking place in the last two days. I knew that it wouldn't last and as soon as Jake felt better everything would go back to the way it was, to the way it was supposed to be.

"Thank you for bathing me, it was fantastic. Don't take too long, I'm not ready to be apart from you for more than a few minutes. Somewhat I feel like this is all a wonderful dream and when I wake up you will still hate me." Jake's words saddened me; he didn't understand the intensity of my feelings toward him. But we had a long time for him to realize that he had nothing to worry about, this was our new reality. We didn't have to dream about a happily ever after, we had been given another chance at happiness and now more than ever, I was going to take advantage of it. Turning around, I walked back towards the bed and sat next to Jake.

"Jake, listen to me, this is not a dream, believe me if this was my dream you wouldn't be hurt, I don't want anything to ever happen to you. This is better than a dream, this is our reality and it will only get better from here. Don't worry about me ever hating you, I… I am in love with you." He took my hand bringing it to his lips and kissed it with unsurpassed devotion. I responded by bending over and kissing him slowly, tender, lovingly. Trailing his full lips with my tongue until he eagerly granted me entrance, our tongues engaged in a dance for dominance inside his mouth. He tasted different from what I was used to. I guessed it was because of the medicines he was receiving, but his wonderful taste was still coming through and I focused on that. I tried not to put too much pressure on his lips, I wanted him to enjoy the kissing, not suffer in pain because of it. He lifted his head several times to increase the contact and pressure on our lips, but I just pushed him back gently, protecting him from his own instincts.

"Down boy; don't hurt yourself." I whispered against his lips, Jake chuckled and relaxed his head back on the bed.

The moment I set foot outside the door a wave of contained giggles erupted in the living room. Walking slowly in that direction, I saw some of my pack brothers congregated in the living room. Paul and Quil were sitting in the small sofa that was currently Billy's makeshift bed, while Brady sat on the floor, it sucked to be the youngest in the pack; thank goodness that was not me anymore. Even though because of my position as Jake's imprint my situation had been different and I never experienced any of the abuse the youngest of the pack had to endure. Embry, Sam, Jared and Leah were missing, Sam and Jared on patrol, Embry and Leah watching the two bastards in Jake's garage.

"What's so funny?" I asked the snickering group of teens.

"You are Seth. Just a few months ago you thought that the idea of having feelings towards Jake was gross, now look at you." Quil was having too much fun remembering the conversation we had in Sam's house, it seemed like it was years ago.

"So Seth, did you enjoy giving Jake a bath?" Paul asked followed by a roar of laughter coming from the teens congregated in the living room. I knew they probably heard everything that took place in the bedroom; I needed to remember in the future not to take for granted the immaturity of my pack brothers or their sense of hearing.

"I just have one question." said Paul "Did Jake like it when you washed his balls?" He tried to remain serious, but was not very successful, his whole face getting red with the sheer effort of keeping a straight face.

I had to stop and think for a second trying to find a witty comeback; "He loved it, I didn't wash them I licked them clean." I felt victorious when I saw Paul stunned look, the feeling was short lived when I saw all of them turn their heads towards the kitchen. They all busted out laughing and I knew the reason.

"Brady, Billy is in the kitchen isn't he?" I hoped to be wrong in my assumption.

"Yes Seth, and so are Emily, Naomi and Kim." The idiot could barely speak; the laughter making him choke on his words.

At that moment I wished I had mutant or magical powers that would help me teleport to another place away from their prying eyes. I couldn't believe I was so careless not to check who was within hearing range when I opened my big mouth. Especially failing to get my father-in-law scent and saying in front of him that I had licked his son's balls, which by the way I didn't. I was messing with my pack mates and ended up sticking my foot in my mouth.

"I'm going to take a shower, Emily can you please bring me some clean clothes?" Turning around to escape as fast as my crutches would take me, I walked to the bathroom to take my shower, while unsuccessfully trying to ignore the immature comments and the raucous laughter of my pack brothers

Jake POV

As soon as my beautiful imprint stepped out of the bedroom and was out of my sight, my heart ached with the pain of the separation. I could hear the laughter and teasing going on in the living room but unfortunately couldn't do anything to prevent further embarrassment. At that moment I was unable to use my legs, the pain and frustration of everything that took place in the last few days surpassing the physical pain I was experiencing.

I was told the attack took place two days ago, but to me it felt like it happened just a few hours ago. I had been in and out of consciousness for almost two days and lost all sense of time and place. That fateful afternoon we had been enjoying each other's company, allowing ourselves to be happy in each other's embrace. He couldn't bring himself to tell me he loved me, but I knew he did, I knew his heart was mine, the same way my heart was his. My Seth was so different from the boy I imprinted on, several months ago; it was like night and day. The old Seth was angry, resentful, unyielding and stubborn. He didn't even want to breathe the same air I breathed. I knew he hated me and the fact that I imprinted on him was not only disgusting to him, but also appalling.

Very slowly he began to open the door to his heart, at first he would open it just a crack, only to slam it on my face the moment I tried to come in. This made me extremely angry and the rejection mixed with the unrelenting torture of my wolf made my life a living hell. I had to remain strong and keep the front of the strong alpha, but inside I was dying. My actions instead of making us get closer, pushed him away more each day. The culmination of this tragic play, with Seth and me as the main characters, was the night of his sixteenth birthday, when I beat him and attempted to kill him, before almost raping him. That awful and shameful night he felt on his body the nature of the beast inside me. I have no idea how he had been able to forgive me after that night, maybe it had been divine intervention, the magic of the imprint or the power of love, but whatever the reason, I would be eternally grateful for his forgiveness.

I had been so afraid of losing him and my eagerness and desire to protect him made me take extreme measures, to the point where I made him my prisoner inside this house. He was so damn stubborn, if only he had submitted from the beginning he would've saved us a lot of aggravation. But on the other hand if he had submitted neither one of us would've changed, I would still be a possessive, aggressive, asshole and he would be a sarcastic, angry, son of a bitch. I knew I will always be possessive and overprotective, but now he had the tools to help me have control over my instincts and my actions.

I'm not one to complain, the journey had many fantastic moments; the night he found me crying and spent the night with me. Our first shower together when he called me "my Jake" for the first time. Our second date when he had a jealous fit in the movie theater, I had to remember to tell him how happy he made me that day, it was the first time he let his guard down and allowed his true feelings to come to the surface. The rest of the night had been magical, with him finding my sweet spot and showing me all the love and devotion he was capable of. The night of the bonfire, when I saw the fire of his pride and love burning beneath those gorgeous gray eyes. So many wonderful memories inundated my mind, we had many hardships, but the good moments surpassed by much the bad ones.

Then it happened, all my fears and nightmares becoming real in an instant. They took the shape of three gruesome monsters that had no heart, no compassion and no honor. To make it even worse, we were betrayed by three of our own kind. Those animals wanted to take my Seth away from me, I didn't need to read their minds to know what they wanted; they wanted to rape him or even kill him. I couldn't let them touch him, I always knew I would gladly give my life for him and I can honestly say I didn't hesitate for one second to do everything in my power to protect him. I knew my limitations, there was no way I was going to survive the fight, but if my death meant he was going to be safe, that was all that mattered.

I never experienced so much pain in my life and I hope never to feel it again, they fought dirty, breaking my legs and my arm so I couldn't stand or jump to evade their punches, kicks and bites. The only relief I felt was when I saw Rex come back, knowing he was not chasing Seth anymore filled me with energy. I could hear Seth's frantic calls to the pack and to me, but I couldn't answer, I was working hard trying to shield my pain from him. Of course being the stubborn asshole he is, he came back, I don't know how he was able to find his way around the alpha commands; he was the only one that could. One day I have to sit down with him and have a serious conversation on this subject, I was so curious about what seemed to be a special ability.

My guardian angel came to my aid and saved me from certain death, Max was getting ready to administer his final blow, when I saw the small sandy wolf jump over me with such strength and might that if I didn't witness it, I wouldn't believe it. I couldn't believe it when Sam told me that Seth killed the bastard. I was barely able to stand up but I needed to fight until I was sure my Seth was safe. When the pack arrived taking those monsters away from us I allowed myself to fall into the dark abyss that had been calling me. I could hear the voices of my pack brothers in my mind, but couldn't answer, the pain was too immense.

In the darkness there was no pain, my only regret was leaving my Seth behind but consoled myself thinking he was so young and beautiful, he could have any woman or man he wanted and it would be his choice. I would be just a memory. The thought made me jealous, but I couldn't be selfish, he deserved to be happy, after the hell I put him through he needed to have somebody in his life that would make him happy. His voice brought me back, begging me to come back to him, to do it for him. Even in death I couldn't deny him anything, I made myself phase to my human form, the pain growing exponentially as the bones changed shape and relocated themselves. But the change was too much, it took the little life I had left, the instant before I welcomed the darkness I heard the most beautiful words. He told me he loved me, I would take Seth's love declaration with me to eternity, what I would've given to be able to hug him and hold him close to me. But I couldn't because death was claiming me and his loving words were all I heard before the darkness consumed me.

Of course I didn't remember anything after that, just flashes in my mind, voices, memories and dreams. The constant was Seth, his voice knocking down the dark walls that surrounded me. I had the most wonderful dream, in it, Seth and I were in our wolf forms and had two little kids riding on our backs; somewhat I knew they were our kids. I couldn't see their faces but I remember their small hands pulling on our fur and their shrieks of joy. It was the best dream I ever had, hopefully now that life had given us another chance this dream will come true. The idea of putting babies in Seth's belly making me blush and my heart beat so loud I could feel it pulsing in my ears. I didn't know why, but I had a feeling that Seth would not deny me his body much longer.

I would dedicate my life to making it up to him for all the horrors I put him through in the past six months. Taking care of each and every need he could have and honoring our sacred bond. I started daydreaming about our future, about watching him receive his diplomas, high school and college, because I would make sure all his educational goals would become a reality. I also fantasized about the day we would promise eternal love in front of our family and friends. I felt myself smile at the idea of Seth round with my child, it may seem unnatural to more than one, but to me it felt as natural as breathing, it felt right.

"Jake are you ok? Is the pain too bad?" I had been so lost in thought, that didn't even notice when the nurse came back in the room. She looked at me with concern sketched into her features, taking one of the towels Seth left beside the chair she started patting my face; I was confused for a moment until I realized she was drying my tears. I had no idea when I started crying but judging by the wetness I felt on the bed near each one of my ears, I had been crying for a while.

"I'm ok, just a lot of memories, some better than others." I smiled weakly at her. "Can I sit? I'm tired of laying down"

"Not yet, your ribs are still too tender and since they are taking longer than usual to heal you can't put pressure on them, but I can prop your head on a couple of pillows." I nodded in understanding. She left the room coming back minutes later accompanied by Quil and Paul.

"Ok, we better do this before Seth comes back or he will bite our heads off." I was annoyed at her for speaking like that about my Seth.

Quil read my expression and intervened in Naomi's defense. "Jake, you have no idea how possessive and overprotective Seth has been acting, he growls at anybody who tries to touch you, we had to take him out of the room so the doctor could treat you, because he wouldn't let him examine you."

"No way! You're lying, my Seth is not like that!"

"Well, if your Seth is not like that, who the hell is in Billy's bathroom taking a shower? Because the guy at the end of the hall is as obnoxious as you are, no offense." Leave it to Paul to turn a simple explanation into an insult.

I couldn't contain the laughter that erupted from deep within me; even with the pain it caused me, I couldn't avoid it. I felt ecstatic, happier than I ever felt. I was almost sure, Seth had imprinted on me! that was the only explanation for his behavior. I winced in pain as Quil and Paul raised my torso while Naomi placed two pillows under my head, when they lowered me into the pillows I felt instant relief from the discomfort on my lower back.

Right then I saw my angel walking back into the room, my soul ached when I saw his broken leg, it was swollen and covered in bruises from just under the knee to the ankle; it was a watercolor of different shades of purple, green and yellow. He was dressed in a pair of black basketball shorts and a blue t- shirt; even with this simple attire he looked dashing.

"Hi beautiful!" I cheerfully greeted him; he answered by giving me a beautiful smile that melted my heart and filled me with mirth.

"Right back at you babe!" He gleefully answered as he struggled to climb on the bed, painfully maneuvering his leg onto the bed. Taking his place next to me, like he was reading my mind, he curled himself on my body the best he could, without hurting either one of us. He bared his neck to me in total submission, giving me access to his pulse point where I could bask in his wonderful scent. A growl of approval erupted in my chest.

"I knew you would like that my love." He murmured close to my ear

"You know me so well Seth."

"Well I've been living with you for almost three months and have a direct line to your thoughts."

Straightening up, he placed a pillow behind him and rested his back against the headboard. Immediately I grabbed his hand interlacing our fingers before bringing it to my lips and kissing it. I inhaled his wonderful scent, so delicious, made me crave double chocolate cookies. I could detect the medicine mixed with his usual chocolate and strawberries scent, but chose to ignore it. He bent over and kissed me softly, he was very careful about not hurting me, I craved his kisses but even I understood that the condition of my face didn't lend itself to any type of making out.

"Why do I smell Quil and Paul on you?" His whole body tensed, his hand gripping mine almost painfully.

"Baby, they helped me up while Naomi placed the pillows under my head, I can't sit yet, I needed help." If it wasn't so amusing I would be seriously pissed off for having to explain myself to my submissive, in all truthfulness under normal circumstances I wouldn't explain anything, but at that moment Seth was the boss and he was calling the shots. Even though I found it slightly disturbing, I loved possessive Seth, my puppy even looked cute when he was angry. I saw him send a death glare at Paul and Quil and they responded by leaving the room in silence.

"Ok that went well, at least this time I was not the one being growled at." Naomi seemed relieved, I wondered how bad had Seth been behaving to have everybody walking on eggshells around him.

"Seth I need to ask you something and I need you to be completely truthful."

"Sure Jake, What is it?

"When did you imprint on me?" My chest swelled with pride and emotion, it was one thing to think about it, but saying it out loud made it very real.

"I didn't Jake." Shit, that was not what I wanted to hear. I felt my face fall at his answer, this was definitely not what I expected, such a roller coaster of emotions from total bliss to total heartache.

"Are you sure Seth? According to everybody you have been acting really strangely and the only logical answer I can think of is that you imprinted on me."

"I'm sorry Jake, I have no explanation for my behavior but I'm sure I haven't imprinted. I've seen the imprinting through Sam's memories and even yours and I haven't felt anything even remotely similar."

"Oh, I just thought…." I couldn't help the disappointment that inundated my being.

"I told you once and I'll tell you again, I don't need to imprint to be able to love you. I fell in love with you in a completely human way, slowly, letting you woo me." I couldn't help but smile at my imprint's remark.

"Another thing, yesterday when you were bathing me, you were looking at me like you wanted to eat me, am I correct in that assumption?" The blushing that covered his face was immediate, turning his beautiful face maroon. He averted his gaze, but a sexy smirk adorned his face. My Seth was not that innocent anymore, he had a mischievous aura around him.

"Jake I didn't want to eat you, that would be a waste of all this hotness." He pointed at my body, again looking at me with the undeniable look of lust in his eyes. "I wanted to jump you. I felt really strange like my body was giving my brain commands instead of the other way around." My heart skipped a beat at Seth's declaration. He wanted me; he craved my body, DAMN IT ABOUT TIME!

"Whenever you want me baby, I'll be more than happy to comply." He had no idea how true was that statement. I had been dreaming for so long about the moment when Seth and I would be one flesh, the moment I would have him under me screaming my name as I thrust deep into his core, the moment when I finally claimed what was mine.

This had been such a new experience for me, never in my life I felt this insane need to have sex, to mate. Yes I would see a pretty girl and like her, maybe get a boner; I would get home and jack off to her, but that would be it. With Seth it was very different, from the moment I imprinted, the need to have him had been feral, wild and untamed. His rejection only added firewood to the raging inferno going on in my loins. But that was all in the past, now he not only loved me, he wanted me. This had to be the best feeling in the entire universe, to feel loved, needed and wanted. I couldn't wrap my mind around the fact that my Seth was accepting me in every aspect of his life, giving me his body would be the last hurdle we would conquer, effectively taking our relationship to a completely new level.

Emily and Kim came in the room carrying two big, steaming bowls of oatmeal with strawberries. Seth asked Kim to set his on the table and took mine from Emily's hands. He shifted slightly so it would be easier for him to feed me. Swirling the oatmeal around the plate a few times Seth took one spoonful and after blowing on it to cool it down, offered it to me. I pursed my lips and refused to open them, I knew I was acting like a petulant child but I didn't care, I earned the right to be cranky at least for a few days.

"I don't like oatmeal." I mumbled barely opening my mouth so Seth wouldn't sneak a spoonful in my mouth; I knew how sneaky my puppy could be.

"Yes you do, I've seen you eat it, you have to take it easy with your stomach, some of your internal organs were affected also."

"I don't want it." I answered.

"You asked for it… open your mouth… now." My eyes widened as I struggled with all my might against the order Seth gave me. I couldn't believe it; the little stinker gave me an alpha order! Shit I never felt this before, the intense need to please my alpha, to obey Seth. This was an interesting shift, hopefully after I got better everything would go back to the way it was. Even though I had a hunch that it would not be exactly the same, too much had happened. I had a newfound respect for Seth, he demonstrated tremendous courage but more importantly, he proved the intensity of his love for me.

After breakfast, Dr. Barnard came in to bandage our broken bones, as the swelling went down he needed to tighten the bandages to make sure they would still exert the necessary pressure on our bones. Even with the pain medicine it was a painful process, the doctor did Seth's leg first, I held his hand and cooed him every time he would squirm and grimace because of the pain.

Then it was my turn, Seth insisted that the doctor sedate me completely, he didn't want me to suffer. I fought him, I didn't want to sleep, I was done feeling useless.

"Jakey let the doctor sedate you, please do it for me. I can't bear to see you suffer anymore; in a way I'm responsible for your injuries and feel horrible because I couldn't do anything to prevent the attack. Maybe if I had been a strong wolf the odds would have been in our favor, but I will always be a runt and you almost died because of me." He had to stop when a choked sob got stuck on his throat and two heavy droplets escaped his eyes rolling down his cheeks onto my chest.

"Seth do not blame yourself for this, I forbid you from ever again calling yourself a runt. You are stronger and more courageous than you realize." With my thumb I wiped his tears. "Doc send me off to dreamland, I don't want my baby to cry anymore." The doctor injected me with a full dose of morphine that in a few minutes made my eyelids impossible to keep open.

"I love you Sethy, I'll see you in a little while baby." His soft kiss was the last thing I felt before falling into a deep slumber.

After what I could only guess were several hours, I opened my eyes finding Seth on his spot next to me using his computer. He gave me his trademark toothy grin and holding the laptop bent over to kiss me.

"How do you feel?" his voice was laced with concern. "Are you in pain? Even with the sedation you winced a few times when the doctor re-bandaged your legs."

"I'm ok, just a little sore, I didn't feel anything, the last thing I remember is your kiss. I don't want that medicine anymore it makes me sleep all the time and I hate feeling useless."

"Jake you know as well as I do that sleeping helps you heal quicker."

"I know but I could be talking to you, enjoying your company, kissing you…" as I said this I wiggled my eyebrows the same way Seth did before my bath.

"Behave Jake, you are in no condition to be so horny." What he didn't know was that especially now that I knew the nature of his feelings, I needed to be near him even more.

"Ok whatever you say Mr. Alpha." He gave me an amused glare, he tried to look angry but he looked mostly adorable.

"Seth, you told me this morning you didn't imprint on me, but fell in love with me, right?" He nodded affirmatively. "When did you realize you were in love with me?"

"Guess." His youthful playfulness coming through in his expression.

"Our second date, on the cliffs" That magical night I caught a glimpse of Seth's feelings, he was still very guarded and careful, but lowered his defenses long enough for me to take a peek at his heart.

"Ding, ding, ding! Wow you got it right on the first try, I'm impressed. How did you know?"

"I didn't, it was just a hunch." Seth looked puzzled with his natural curiosity peeking through his gorgeous gray eyes.

"Jake, have you been having other hunches since you regained consciousness?" Now I was the one who felt confused, Seth question was kind of random and I had no clue at what was behind it. The moment I opened my mouth to answer a knock on the door interrupted our conversation. I saw the door open a crack and Leah's head peer in.

"Can we come in?" I could smell Paul, Quil and Embry. Seth looked at me and I nodded in approval. He had taken in his role of submissive superbly, even now that he was acting alpha until I recovered, he still knew he needed to ask my permission for any males to be so close to him. I was even more impressed, if that was even possible.

"Sure guys, come in." One by one my pack mates filled the small room, making the temperature rise with all the combined body heat. Leah sat on the bed by Seth's feet; I didn't feel uncomfortable with her sitting so close to him because in my mind she posed no threat to our relationship, unlike others who I needed to watch closely. Quil situated himself next to Leah and too fucking close to Seth, he was lucky I didn't toss him out of the room.

"How are you feeling guys?" Leah's question was directed to both of us, but her eyes were on her brother's bandaged leg.

"We're better, I'm almost healed but my injuries were minimal. Jake on the other hand is taking a little bit longer to heal." The pain and regret my imprint felt colored his words a sad shade of gray.

"I look worse than I feel." I needed to say something to put Seth's mind at ease.

"Then you must feel like crap because you look like shit." Paul's witty comment made everybody burst out laughing, effectively defusing the tension in the room.

"C'mon Paul don't be such a dick, he has been through hell." Embry came to my defense.

"I call them as I see them man, no sugar coating with me, you know that. By the way, speaking of knowing, Seth did you give Jake the good news?" Paul said his question in a sing-song voice that carried with it the ill intention of sparking my curiosity.

"What good news Paul?" Asked Seth at the same time Leah gave Paul a warning look.

"You know Seth, the big promise you made when you thought he was going to buy the farm." Turning my head slightly to look at my imprint I saw that he looked pale and felt his heart thrumming in his chest.

"I didn't tell him yet, but I will, so shut up!" Seth's fists were clenching and unclenching with barely contained anger.

"Paul why do you have to be such a jerk, it's none of your business." Leah let Paul have it right there.

"Ok, I'll shut up, but Jake remember to ask Seth, trust me you're going to like it." Paul winked at me and patted my leg gently.

"Don't touch him! How many times do I need to say it, I don't want any of you to fucking touch Jake!" Every person in the room sprung up in surprise and Seth was growling and baring his teeth, he looked ready to launch himself at Paul. I was witnessing what the guys had been talking about earlier; Seth was so overprotective, he was acting like….. Me.

"Sorryyyyy! Seth please forgive me!" Paul threw himself on the floor like a really bad actor in a school play, yes that bad. We all busted out laughing and even though Seth tried to keep a straight face he succumbed to the effects of Paul's plead.

"I think we should leave, Paul's acting is making me nauseous I don't want Seth and Jake to add nausea to their aches and pains." After saying good bye each one of them padded out of the room.

Seth sat very still for a few minutes deep in thought, something about him that always fascinated me. He then curled to my side placing his head on my shoulder.

"You must be dying to know what Paul was talking about aren't you?"

"Definitely Seth, but only tell me if you want to, the days of me forcing you to do something are staying in the past, I won't do that anymore."

"Well I will have to tell you sooner or later. When you were really sick I talked to you a lot, I told you things I never told anyone and promised something very important." He paused for what seemed like hours, nervously wringing his shirt and biting his lower lip. I wondered what was so important that was making him so troubled.

"Shit Seth spit it out!" I demanded

"I promised that as soon as we were both better, I will give myself to you….fully." Seth wouldn't even look at me, embarrassment making him look very uncomfortable.

"Seth, don't joke about that" This wouldn't be the first time Seth took the physical aspect of our relationship lightly.

"I'm not joking, I'm not afraid anymore, we'll make love, you will claim me." Now it was my heart thrumming in my chest, my whole body slightly shaking in excitement. I pulled Seth towards me and kissed him deeply, claiming his lips, getting a taste of what was to come.

I spent the afternoon daydreaming about the day I would claim the body of my Seth. The dim light of the setting sun creeping in through the room's only window, the afternoon sky bloomed in an array of oranges, pinks, blues and greys that adorned it, making it look like something taken out of an art book. My Seth didn't dare interrupt my musing; I felt he was kind of amused with my excitement. His face was quiet but his eyes betrayed him, they looked nervous.

I felt so alive; at last the finish line was within my reach. No more lonely nights, I didn't have to beg for crumbs anymore, Seth gave me his heart and now he was going to give me his body. I couldn't wait for the days to pass, the hours moving too slow for my aching soul.

The next morning a commotion in the living room woke me up from my slumber; Seth looked just as sleepy eyed and confused as I did. Everybody was talking at the same time, I could hear Billy's voice telling everybody to lower their voices but it was useless, nobody seemed to be paying attention to my father. A loud crackling thunder echoed through the whole house, competing with the blaring noises coming from the living room.

"What's going on?" Seth's voice interrupted whatever argument or dispute that was taking place. I heard the soft steps of my pack brothers as they approached the bedroom. I could easily distinguish the steps of any shifter from human steps, shifters where stealthy in their movements and humans were not.

One by one my pack brothers walked in the room, only Embry and Brady were missing. They all looked agitated, their hearts racing and their breathing faster than necessary.

Jared's shoulders were hiked up to his ears, in an obvious sign that he was very tense, by his side Kim looked nervous and anxious, she kept biting her lower lip. Leah was fidgeting with some threads coming off the edge of her shirt, while constantly shifting her weight, from one leg to the other. A furious scowl etched on her face.

Quil had his hands in his pockets but not even that could hide the tension on his arms and his face. Sam came in followed by a teary eyed Emily, he looked hesitant and nervous.

Paul was the most obvious; he kept pacing from one side of the room to the other, shaking in anger, fists clenched by his sides and his jaw tense. The last one to come in was Billy; he wheeled himself slowly inside the room, too slow even for him.

"What's going on guys? Why the commotion?" I asked beginning to feel tense myself because everybody's strange behavior.

"Son, I spoke with the elders of the Awani reservation. The men who attacked you didn't lie, they are indeed from there. I informed them of everything that happened. The alpha of their pack called early this morning, his name is Mark he was very brief and concise, even after I asked him about these individuals he wouldn't provide any information. He told me they will be here in three days and that we will discuss the matter at hand in person."

"That's all? That's not bad, why is everybody acting like it's the end of the world?" Asked Seth, the eyes of every person in the room looked in any direction but Seth's and mine.

"The problem is not what they said but what they didn't say. The alpha had a mask of calmness in his voice but I could sense there was something going on. Then I heard the voices of what I can only guess were the rest of their pack….. they were arguing and yelling it was hard to understand"

"But what did you hear? For goodness sake, tell us!" Seth was proving to be just as impatient as I was.

"The people in the room were demanding the application of pack law." The second those words left my father's lips I felt like somebody dumped a bucket of ice cold water on my head. I tightened my grip to the point I hurt Seth's hand.

"NO, THEY CANNOT! I WILL NOT ALLOW IT!" Even in my weakened state my voice startled every person in the room, only Seth remained calm. Placing his hand on my cheek he tried to help me calm down, but it was impossible, there will be no rest for me until this matter was settled.

"Billy what is pack law?" Knowing my father will answer truthfully Seth directed his question at him.

"Nothing you have to worry about my angel." I interfered making a huge effort to soften my voice and hide the anger boiling deep inside me getting ready to erupt at any moment.

"Jake, don't patronize me, is very clear I'm the only one who doesn't know what it means, I just want to know what is making everybody so nervous" his words were calm and soothing.

"Billy please tell me, what is pack law?"

"Seth each individual pack sets their own rules but there are some that apply to every pack in the world, for example the one that states that the pack will protect the imprints with their own life if necessary."

"I see but I doubt that is the law that had you all in an uproar a few minutes ago." My imprint was so inquisitive, too smart for his own good in the present situation.

"There is another one, it's hard to explain, is kind of an eye for an eye." I closed my eyes trying to control my breathing, I needed to remain calm for my imprint.

"An eye for an eye… oh… that means that since I killed one of theirs, they have the right to…" Seth directed his gaze at me, his eyes wide and scared.

"Seth, calm down that is not going to happen, I will not allow it." I had no idea at the moment how I was going to protect him, they were coming in three days and I was sure my legs would not be healed by the time they got here. I needed to think and strategize, but the most important thing at the moment was to keep Seth calm.

"Baby, there is not much you can do; you won't be healed in three days. I don't want you to risk phasing and hurting yourself again, that's something I will not allow. I guess it is fair, I committed a crime, I took a life." My imprint was so noble but I wouldn't let him give up, he couldn't give up.

"It's not right, it's not fair and it will not happen! Nobody is going to touch you. I swear right now that the only way any of those people will touch you will be over my dead body, while there is life left in me, while my heart is still beating, they will not lay one finger on you." My whole body shook in fear and anger, looking directly into my imprint's eyes I tried to assure him of my promise. That's when I felt another warm hand on top of our intertwined ones, it was Sam's.

"I swear on my life that the only way they could get their hands on you, will be because I no longer exist little brother." Sam promised with his hand over ours.

"I swear on my life that nobody will touch you, I'll be like a mama lion protecting her cub." This time it was Leah's hand joining the others over my chest.

"I swear on my life that if they want to get to you, they'll have to get through me first." Jared sat on the bed next to me and placed his hand over the others.

"I swear on my life that nobody will even get close to you while there is breath in my lungs." Quil solemnly promised and joined the others, placing his hand over ours

"I swear on my life that none of those sons of bitches will lay a finger on you, brother." Paul's promise surprised me the most; it was just like him raw and to the point. As Paul's hand joined the others in our sacred promise the room felt heavy with the sense of brotherhood that permeated in the air.

Billy's baritone voice took me out of my internal reverie. "Seth, you saved my son's life twice, first risking your own life to protect him. The second time will always be a mystery to me, but you made him hear your voice when he was at the gate of the land of our ancestors, you brought him back to us. You and Jake are one and the same, that makes you also my son. I swear that while there is still life in this old body nobody will come near you, I may not be a wolf, but I have excellent aim." Smiling softly he placed his hand on Seth's arm.

We all remained silent for an undetermined period of time, Seth crying quietly as the words and actions of our pack brothers overwhelmed him. I wasn't certain but felt that everything was going to be fine. At that moment we were not an unruly group of teens, we were not a wild pack of wolves, we were not a group of friends, we were a lot more, we were family, we were….. brothers.


	32. Chapter 32 Hoping for the best

**A big thank you to all the readers, especially those who added the story to their alerts, favorite story or favorite author. To those of you who took the time to review you made my day, all your reviews give me encouragement and bring a smile to my face.**

**I should mention that I don't own Twilight or any of its characters, they belong to Stephenie Meyer.**

Chapter 32 Hoping for the best

One by one each member of the pack exited the room. We all shared a barrage of feelings, we all felt happy, worried, troubled and hopeful but in me, each one of those feelings was ten times stronger. I was happy for all the expressions of love I received from my family; I was bound to only two of them by blood, but to all of them by love and brotherhood.

I was worried for my family, my pack brothers, for myself, but more for Jacob. I knew Sam and Leah would not stand back and allow the Awani pack to slaughter me. I didn't know what to do, of course I was afraid of dying, but I couldn't let my family die for a crime I committed. What would happen to Emily if Sam was killed? I loved her like a sister and the idea of her suffering because of me filled me with grief.

The pack had been more than courageous by making a solemn promise to protect me, but the consequences of that promise were too great for me to ignore. They all had families that loved them; I couldn't bring so much tragedy to the reservation.

My fear for what was coming was small compared to my fear for what Jacob would do. Understanding the intensity of his feelings toward me made me see that he was not going to sit back and do nothing when the Awani pack came to get me. There were only two ways they could be successful and kill me, one would be if Jake had already been killed in which case I wouldn't have anything to live for and would welcome my death. The second would be if Jake had been incapacitated by any of them, this one was even worse for me to fathom, the idea of Jake suffering because of my death made my heart ache. What made a shiver run up my spine was the certainty that Jake would take his life, the inevitability of this act weighting heavily in my soul. I knew we would follow each other, even in death.

I was troubled for the fact I didn't understand the thought process behind this new threat, the wolves came here and attacked us, not the other way around. Why were they making demands when it was more than clear that they broke the rules and we only defended ourselves? Even with all that had happened and this new threat I felt hopeful, because I didn't see the point of any higher being keeping us on this earth for this long, surviving being attacked by vampires and werewolves only to destroy us with a technicality.

The impending threat of a war between the two packs was something else to consider. Pack politics was a touchy subject but it had never been cause for alarm, we always kept amicable relations with the surrounding packs. But this was an unprecedented event. Billy had been reading any old manuscript he could find, trying to find a historic loophole, so to speak. I was racking my brain trying to come up with a solution that would not have the words war or death in it, but so far I had been unsuccessful. I felt like I was swimming and needed to come up for air but couldn't, the weight of all these events keeping me under water.

An extremely warm hand on my cheek took me out of my internal reverie. "Planet earth calling Seth." Jake was making a monumental effort to seem calm, but I could see that behind his perfectly rehearsed facade he was beside himself with fear and worry.

"Sorry babe, just a lot in my mind." I gave him one of my best smiles, but just as I knew that he was faking it, he knew I was doing the same.

"Angel you have nothing to worry about, I will not let anything happen to you, trust me." Jake ran his fingers through my hair and I couldn't help but close my eyes and enjoy the sensation.

"I trust you Jake; it's that other pack that I don't trust."

"You don't have to trust or fear them, they will not touch you. Didn't you hear your pack? You have the best and most courageous friends anybody could dream of. And you have me, your humble protector, I may not look like much now, but I can still bring it." I had no choice but to laugh at his witty remark.

"I know… you just want to protect me, because you want to claim me." I sent a good natured glare in his direction.

"And you blame me? I have too much time invested in this!" He pointed up and down my body "It took me months to wear you down to where you are right now. I lost hope more than once thinking I was not going to be able to tame you, but I persevered and triumphed." His superhero impersonation was childlike but very charming. He gave me a shit-eating grin and this time it was sincere.

"Wear me down? Tame me? Fuck you Jacob!" I growled in mock anger but knew that I probably sounded more like a helpless puppy.

"No babe, you don't fuck me, I'll fuck you." He winked at me, bringing our interlaced hands to his lips and kissing each one of my fingers.

"You know that if you didn't have so many broken bones I would beat you up." Even as a joke it sounded wrong for me to say this, I could never hurt him. Not just because physically he could crush me in a heartbeat, but I never wanted to see him hurt, even less by my hand. He just chuckled lightly at my stupid comment. He had changed so much; if I would've said that a few months ago, he would've been furious probably slamming me against a wall only to force himself on me. I smiled remembering how repulsive I found his behavior.

"You're smiling, that's what I like, what were you thinking about just now?" I debated whether or not to tell him the truth; finally I decided that I couldn't lie to him. The truth, even if it hurts is always better than a lie and I didn't want to get in the habit of lying to him.

"I don't want to lie to you; I was just remembering how you use to force yourself on me and how much I used to hate it." It broke my heart to see his face fall as soon as he heard my answer.

"I was such a monster Seth; even if we live forever it will not be long enough to apologize for all the horrors that I put you through." My poor Jake could be the poster boy for remorse and regret, he knew his acts were violent and he resented not only himself, but also his wolf.

"No need to apologize Jake, everything has been forgiven." I was sincere, especially now I needed to let go of any resentment toward him.

"I don't deserve you Seth." Knowing that he will never really forgive himself for the months of hell he put me through was hard, but it was even worse to understand that he considered himself unworthy.

"You're right; you don't deserve all this awesomeness." A hearty chuckle rumbled in his chest and I couldn't help it and attacked his lips without mercy, seeing that they were looking a little better, but I still had to make sure. "Love, are your lips hurting?"

"They only hurt when you don't kiss them Seth." I pulled back slightly so he could see me rolling my eyes at his cheesy comment. The worse thing was that I didn't want to stop with his lips; I wanted to claim his chest, to run my tongue between his pecks and on his well-formed abs. I wanted to taste his sex, to have him inside my mouth and swallow his seed like I had done several times before. I didn't know if I would be able to do any of this, I didn't know if we had a future.

"Why did you stop kissing me Seth?" His voice was a whimper sounding like a sad little puppy.

"Sorry, what?" I blinked away the tears that were pooling in my eyes, trying to hide them from Jake. Tough luck, like he would miss something like that.

"Seth, I won't ask you why you're crying, all I can ask you is not to lose faith. You have all of us in your corner and you will not be left alone." I just curled myself on his body burying my face on the crook of his neck to bask on his addictive scent. He turned his head towards me and as on cue we inhaled deeply enjoying the intimacy of this simple gesture.

When Naomi came in the room, she found us in that position curled into each other like two pieces of a puzzle. I could hear her steps and smell the soft aroma of her perfume but couldn't make my body peel away from Jake's.

"Seth what are you doing to poor Jake? I can't leave you two alone for one minute that I come in to find you all over each other." She was also trying to be funny, it appeared that everybody was instructed to keep me happy and entertained so I wouldn't think about my demise.

I moved away from Jake, my gaze alternated between Naomi and Jake, the weight of the whole situation falling on me all at once. "I don't have much time, I need to enjoy this, to take as much of him with me when…"

"STOP IT SETH, I forbid you from talking like that! I know I'm breaking a promise by doing this, but I will not let you be so negative about this. Your negativity is very distressing." With a grimace Jake sat up on the bed and pulled me towards him with his free arm, crushing me onto his chest.

"Jake no! You're going to hurt yourself." I pushed him gently back on the bed and even though he was trying very hard to hide his physical pain I could see it, I could feel it as it was my own.

"I don't care, you need me." Jake's whole body was shaking in anger and frustration. I needed to do something to calm him down before he complicated things even more by hurting himself. Sitting next to him I placed one hand on his chest and another on his cheek. I bent over and whispered sweet nothings in his ear. I could feel the tension melting under my touch, his breathing slowing down, his heart coming back to his usual steady beat.

"Excuse me guys but I need to give you your pain medicine, you're getting a new one today, no more shots." Interrupted Naomi in full nurse mode.

"Will it make me as sleepy as the other one?" Asked Jacob.

"Not that much, maybe just a little, but you need your rest Jake."

"I won't be able to rest until this problem is solved and my Seth is safe."

The morning was quiet, but in the afternoon there was an endless stream of visitors that made it impossible for neither one of us to rest. After dinner, Quil came in the room to check on us. Jake was absolutely livid because of his visit and all but yelled at him to get out of the room. I decided that it was time for this discord to end.

"Jake, Quil we need to talk, this has been going on long enough and it has to end! You guys used to be best friends and now you cannot even be in the same room with me." I could tell they were surprised by my boldness; after all we're talking about a small submissive screaming at two dominants, one of them an alpha.

"Quil, he needs to know the truth." Quil's eyes widened in surprise and fear, the last thing he wanted was for anybody to know what he considered his dirty little secret.

"Seth, please no." Begged Quil, while Jake observed the exchange between us.

"Quil you need to understand that keeping this a secret is hurting your relationship with Jake and with me. You are my friend; you were the only one that came to see me when I was isolated from the pack. Jake you need to know that Quil was your biggest supporter; he defended you whenever I started rambling about how much I hated you. He kept telling me how much you loved me and asking me to give you a chance." Jake seemed to be deep in thought, considering every aspect of what he was hearing. In everything related to me, Quil was his enemy. The relationship between Jake and Quil was non-existent and I needed to make sure that it would heal without leaving a scar. This had the potential of becoming a weak link in the heavy chain that made up our pack.

"Also Quil you know very well I can't keep secrets from him, remember I'm his submissive." It was the first time I admitted to any member of the pack my position as submissive; it was very freeing to accept my reality.

After hearing my declaration Jake's gaze could be described with many words amazement, pride, happiness, excitement but at the end it was pure inexhaustible love pouring out of his very soul. We got lost into each other's eyes forgetting about poor Quil standing awkwardly next to our bed.

Quil cleared his throat to get our attention, he was probably debating whether or not to leave, but he knew as well as I did that this matter needed to be settled.

"Quil what the hell is it that you don't want Seth to tell me? You want him don't you? Let me tell you right now, you can't have him, he is mine." Jake's words were like a whip flogging a desolate and scared looking Quil, who stood his ground unwilling to accept Jake's false accusations.

"Jake you couldn't be more wrong, he doesn't want me, he wants someone else." I looked at Quil who accepting his defeat nodded, allowing me to inform Jake of his predicament. Knowing that there might be other wolves in hearing range I whispered in Jake's ear Quil's big secret. Jake's eyes were wide with disbelief, shame writing itself on his face for having judged one of his best friends unfairly.

"Quil I'm sorry, as usual I made an ass of myself, please forgive my stupidity." An embarrassed looking Jake pleaded to his friend.

"No problem man, I understand." They bumped fists and for the first time in months there was no tension between them.

Jake thought it was a good idea when I suggested that we should move to our room on the second floor. At the moment I wasn't thinking about us, I saw how uncomfortable Billy was on the sofa and since Jake could sit and move easier, with some help we could get him upstairs. My leg was still very sore but the doctor gave me the green light to put some weight on it. Jake's legs and his arm were still a long way from healing, something that frustrated him tremendously.

Before carrying him to our room we got him in the shower and I helped him take a good shower. Even with half his bones broken I could count on Jake to be a total horn dog, but I was more than happy to comply with his requests. I was sure his grunts and moans of uncensored pleasure could be heard all over the house, he didn't even try to muffle the sounds coming out of his mouth. "Shit Seth, just like that baby… oh yes suck me dry…" I felt an immense satisfaction knowing I was pleasuring him. My jaw was hurting; to accommodate Jake's girth took some serious mouth widening. But I didn't complain, I loved working my tongue over his substantial thickness, even if I couldn't take him all in. To feel the weight of his swollen flesh on my tongue and the taste of his release filling my mouth and overpowering my senses. A shout erupted out of his throat as his orgasm blasted through him. Afterwards his face was the perfect example of sexual lethargy.

Leaving Jake in the bathroom I walked towards the living room to see who was going to help us get to the second floor. As soon as I set foot in the hallway the raucous laughter of half of the pack members broke the silence that permeated in the house. Walking towards them I was ready to give them a piece of my mind, when I saw Billy and Naomi in the living room unsuccessfully trying to stifle their own laughter. My face was on fire and I couldn't make my brain compose a complete sentence. Of all people Billy took pity on me. "Leave him alone boys, I didn't hear Jake complain once."

"Of course he didn't complain Billy he was too busy moaning… _oh yes Seth… just like that baby…" _I looked around trying to find something to throw at Jared to make him shut up; thankfully Sam beat me to it and slapped him hard on the back of the head, effectively making him stop his embarrassing monologue.

I didn't think I would be able to look Billy in the eye for a long time, but when I thought about it, he needed to get used to the sound of making love. Because of my promise I was sure that pretty soon I would be the one moaning as Jake fucked me mercilessly. I shuddered in fear and anticipation thinking of the day Jake would claim me.

The next day the preparations continued, turning Billy's house into the command center for operation 'protect Seth'. They came up with several plans, finally agreeing that when the Awani pack arrived they would be directed to the community center to meet with the Elders and the council. It was Billy's idea to try a diplomatic approach first; if they were successful, the matter could be resolved without any bloodshed. If they were not successful and the Awani's insisted on the application of pack law, the meeting would give us time to strategize according to their numbers.

I felt stupid and completely useless during the planning, everybody had a task and they were all risking their lives to protect me and all I was doing was approving or disapproving their suggestions, feeling that with each decision I was sending someone to a certain death. As Jake got stronger he started taking over his position as alpha, I was more than happy with that, he was a born leader, I was not. He had the presence and the strength that the position called for. I, on the other hand had none of it, I was tiny, weak and right now I couldn't even use my only strength, my speed.

Embry was assigned to stay by our window so nobody could sneak in through it. Sam and Billy would be the first line of the defense doing everything in their power to prevent any access to the house through the front door. I didn't want Billy to take part in any of it, but he insisted saying this was his home and he was going to defend it. He also added that he would do everything in his power to protect his sons, this declaration made me get goose bumps; I guess this whole nightmare helped all of us face our demons and make peace with our life. Paul was stationed on the back door with the instructions to do whatever was necessary to prevent anybody from coming in through that door. Jared and Brady would be the second line of defense; they would cover the living room and the stairs heading to our room.

Leah and Quil would be with us in the bedroom, my sister wouldn't accept any other position feeling the motherly instinct kicking in full blown. Quil volunteered for the position feeling he needed to earn the approval of his alphas, like a little kid who knows he had done something wrong and tries to make up for it. But in this case he had done nothing wrong, we don't choose who we fall in love with.

The morning of the day the Awani pack was supposed to arrive I woke up with my stomach in a knot. I blinked a few times as the bright sunlight coming in through the window inundated the room. It was going to be a beautiful day, one of those rare sunny days, made me feel hopeful that everything was going to be fine. But my pessimist nature took over; making me think this was going to be the last beautiful morning I would ever see.

Beside me Jake laid still asleep, he was very restless all night, not being able to settle down and probably couldn't sleep soundly until early hours of the morning. I couldn't sleep either, the storm of feelings in my very soul making me feel like I couldn't breathe. I observed his strong profile, memorizing every inch of his face, the shape of his lips, how his nose curved downwards on the tip. I wanted to absorb all of him through my pores, to feel him under my skin.

Laying on my side I made a mental recollection of our life together, from the first time I noticed him when he used to visit Sam's house, to last night when between tears and kisses we said our good-byes. He was confident that everything would be solved, but nobody was one hundred percent sure, the balance could tilt either way and there was a lot on the line.

It was still very early and the house was quiet, I could hear Billy's light snoring as well as Leah's and Paul who were sleeping in Jacob's room. Downstairs Quil and Jared joined the others in their concerto, hearts steadily beating almost in unison. Everybody was resting gathering their strength, hoping for the best but preparing for the worst. Sam probably stayed in his house after dropping off Emily at her relatives in the Makah reservation. Both Jake and I insisted that Emily and Kim needed to be as far as possible from La Push, if push came to shove and a war broke out, they could be harmed. From our experience we knew this pack was not beyond harming imprints. Embry was watching Rex and Donovan, he insisted he could be by himself since he only needed to howl and all the wolves in the house would be in the garage in less than a minute.

I tried to go back to sleep but it was useless, I was too nervous and worried. Probably feeling my uneasiness Jake woke up, and looked at me with a sad smile on his gorgeous face, that sadness a poignant foreshadowing of an uncertain future. He placed his arm around my neck, holding me close, like I was a scared little child. Indeed that's how I felt, lost and scared beyond belief. I caused all this tragedy, if I had stopped for a second to think, I could've incapacitated Max instead of killing him. The anger and fear for Jake's life made me act on instinct, without stopping to think of the consequences. I felt the sting of the tears forming in my eyes, the pressure on my chest reaching unbearable levels. I cried on his shoulder the crystal tears slipping down my cheeks and onto his skin.

"Puppy none of that, tears and sadness are for those who have given up. I humored you last night and said good-bye, but I feel deep within me that everything will work out, that these people will see reason." He was afraid too, there was no doubt about it, but he was not afraid of what would happen to him, he was too selfless for that. He was afraid for me, for his father and for his pack.

As the day advanced there was an unheard tension that was almost palpable, the wind whispering eerily through the house. A profound unease making every person in the room shiver in fear. Something was going to happen and at the end of the day we could be celebrating, counting our losses or all dead.

We got word that the Awani pack arrived on La Push at about ten in the morning. The alpha, his beta and two other members of the pack were accompanied by the elders and several council members. This was not too bad there were only four of them. They were totally daft if they thought my pack would hand me over just like that. If they insisted, they would face a nasty fight one in which they would be in total disadvantage. My excitement evaporated like an ice cube in a hot sidewalk when we were informed that Max's father was a member of the council. A shiver ran up my spine, I felt all was lost, he was going to demand retribution, they will demand blood.

At around noon the house was a beehive of activity, the Awani pack was coming. Jake's arm tightened around my waist, the jaw tense and his eyes narrowed. Leah paced nervously, constantly looking out the window. Quil's eyes were fixed on the door like he was expecting a menacing monster to knock down the door and attack us in any moment.

We heard voices outside some of them we didn't recognize but we could identify Sam's, Billy and Dr. Barnard. I remembered that Dr. Barnard had been made a member of the council and sworn to keep the secrecy of our existence. Hopefully he would've been able to testify about the extent of our injuries and brutality of the attack.

"It's ok Jared, they are not going to hurt Seth, they have no interest on starting a war between the two packs." Sam's voice sounded strained, the double meaning with its intended warning, floating in the air.

"Are you sure Sam? I don't think it's a good idea for all of them to go upstairs." Jared sounded harsh almost rude, very unlike him.

"Mark, as you can see we are willing to put our lives on the line to protect Seth. We want to believe that you have good intentions and no desire to harm him. But you cannot blame us for being careful and suspicious, if you were in our situation you would be too. After all, three members of your pack came here and attacked us." Sam's authority came through in every word.

"I understand; how about just me and Daniel go talk to them? The others can stay downstairs and wait for us." I didn't recognize the voice this time, but I guessed it was Mark's.

We heard heavy footsteps coming up the stairs and stopping in front of our door. Leah crouched in front of our bed and Quil stood between the door and the bed. Both of them were visibly shaking in anticipation of a fight. Jake positioned his body so it was almost entirely covering me, trying his best to protect me from the unwanted guests.

The door opened slowly and Sam walked in hands up in surrender, he knew that each person in the room was ready to pounce whoever came through the door. "Guys calm down; Mark and his beta Daniel just want to talk to Jacob and Seth. There is no animosity or desire to start a fight. Jake, is it ok if they come in?"

"I guess so, but they need to stand against the wall; I don't want either one of them to get close to Seth." Jake was shaking visibly, his fists clenching and unclenching, his voice unsure for the first time in his life.

Two men entered the room; they were very similar in appearance to Jake. One of them was as tall as Jake with a strong jaw and heavy brows, making him look animalistic, his gentle demeanor in clear contrast to his appearance. The other was probably two or three inches shorter, but he was built like a wrestler. One thing was very obvious; they were without a doubt two dominants.

"Hi, my name is Mark I'm the alpha of the Awani tribe pack." The taller one introduced himself; he was dressed very much in pack style with a pair of jeans and a gray t-shirt. The man that accompanied him was the very picture of sadness, his eyes were veiled by sorrow and his pain was almost contagious. "This is Daniel my beta." Mark pointed toward the sad looking man to his left.

They both looked at us with light astonishment in their eyes, Jake was very uneasy almost on edge. I was very concerned about Jake's welfare; he kept looking from one to the other like trying to decide which one to attack first.

"I'm sorry for staring; it's that we never believed there was such a thing as submissive wolves. You must be Seth right?" Mark motioned to walk towards me, his hand extended trying to say hello.

"That's close enough!" Bellowed Jake, making everybody stop for a minute and think about the next step.

Mark understood and took a step back towards the wall. Daniel expression was unreadable, his eyes dead, I noticed how red they looked, like he had been crying for hours or maybe even days.

"I'm sorry for being so abrupt, as you can understand we don't know much about submissives. The elders of our tribe told us what they knew, that they are smaller, smell different, can get pregnant and are sought after by any alpha until they are claimed by their intended mate." Ok this was new, sought by any alpha, not even Jay told us about this one.

"What do you mean sought by any alpha?" Jake tightened his grip around my waist to the point it became painful.

"Any alpha that sees him will be wildly attracted to him, his wolf demanding that he mate immediately. Our alpha wolf will identify the female alpha and the need to mate becomes unbearable, knowing that their union will produce a superior alpha one stronger than any other, since it came from two alphas. That attraction disappears when the submissive is claimed. When his scent is mixed with the scent of the dominant, it lets any wolf know that he is completely off-limits" Jake was trying to keep his expression neutral, but I could sense his fear and astonishment.

"Are you attracted to Seth right now?" Demanded Jake in a rumbling voice that was meant to be intimidating…. And it was.

"I won't lie, yes, I am; he is just… too beautiful."

Shit, not again.

"Quil get him out of here, you too, this conversation is over!" Screamed Jake

"Wait please, I may be attracted to him, but I'm in control. I know he is your imprint and that makes him untouchable."

"Well, your pack mate didn't seem to share your respect for imprints or human life for that matter. And just like with that bastard, Max, I can smell your arousal."

"Max was not part of my pack and neither are Rex or Donovan, they are exiles." Stated Mark assuming a dominant stance.

"Exiles? Explain."

"Max was the first one to phase in our tribe, that was a little over a year ago. A few weeks later Rex phased followed by Donovan. For months it was just the three of them, with Max as their alpha. In the beginning they were true protectors of the tribe, doing patrols and keeping everybody safe. But that was short lived; they thought that with their position in the tribe with Max as chief, they could take advantage of everybody. They would steal anything valuable, demand food and harass every girl in the tribe. Everybody feared them and the council didn't know what to do, too embarrassed to ask for help from other packs." Mark started pacing, nervously rubbing his hands together.

"Two more guys phased, Owen and Brandon, Owen is downstairs with Eli, Brandon is back at the reservation. They didn't agree with the behavior of the pack but couldn't go against the alpha's orders, they were forced to obey. With a bigger pack the problems increased to the point that some people even moved away from the reservation trying to find safety and peace of mind somewhere else."

"Five months ago I phased followed by Daniel two weeks later. As I learned the truth behind all our legends the reality of my heritage came out. I am the great-grandson of the last alpha, fact that made me the rightful alpha of the pack. Max didn't want to step down, he challenged for the right to be alpha. We fought and even though he had a lot more experience than me, I had my heritage on my side and defeated him." Stated Mark proudly.

"Max decided he couldn't serve the tribe under me and formed his own pack. Our laws are very clear in the fact that there can only be one pack per tribe, which makes sense because two packs with two alphas would be too confusing and even dangerous. He became resentful and his behavior grew worse with every passing minute."

"Unable to accept their behavior anymore I called for a vote and everybody voted in favor of exiling him and his pack, even his father voted against him. In one last attempt, I offered to allow them to stay in exchange for their solemn promise of model behavior and respect for every citizen of the Awani. They decided that exile was better than serving under me and becoming responsible members of our community."

"They were mad and in an act of cowardice and revenge, kidnapped a fifteen year old girl, savagely raped her and left her in the forest to die. Daniel found her and brought her to the hospital, but there was not much they could do, she died of a hemorrhage caused by the brutal attack she suffered. Those animals tortured and killed an innocent girl." He stopped to wipe a few tears from his face.

"You see, that girl was my sister and Daniel's imprint. He was the only one who could find her, but unfortunately he had to see her broken and carry her bleeding body, only for her to die in his arms. That's something that as long as he lives he will not forget or forgive." He turned his head to look at his beta who was furiously rubbing his hands over his eyes.

"As short as that would be." Murmured Daniel, I could understand the pain behind his words and the conviction to his plans.

"That's why we couldn't get here sooner, we needed to make the arrangements and my parents are devastated. I don't think they will ever recover."

"Then why all the talk about pack law?" That question had been plaguing me from the moment Mark said they were exiles. If they were not part of their pack or their tribe, why were they so involved in this? I hadn't said one word since they came in the room and the question startled them. Mark looked at me with the unmistakable look of lust in his eyes. Cowardly I hid behind Jake, placing my head on his shoulder and my arms around his waist.

"We were getting organized to hunt those bastards when Mr. Black called and informed us of everything this trio did; the whole pack went on an uproar. As you can imagine we've lived Daniel's pain as it was our own, I've relieved him from patrols for a while because none of us could bear to be phased at the same time as him, it's overwhelming. As a pack we had decided the application of pack law was mandatory in this case, it's something none of us is looking for but –"

Daniel interrupted Mark. "Speak for yourself, I will get great pleasure on ripping apart those sons of bitches. Only after they are dead my Melina will rest in peace and so will I. But the leader was Max and it was my right to kill him. Seth, you took that right away from me!" Jake tensed up ready to phase if it became necessary, in a heartbeat Daniel was being flanked by Quil, Leah and Sam. I brought one of my hands to Jake's back and started tracing lazy circles to try to calm him.

"Calm down brother, Seth had no idea, he didn't know." Mark spoke calmly but with the authority inherent to an alpha. Daniel seemed to calm down; he brought his hands to his face to clean away the tears that were rolling freely down his cheeks.

"Pack law will be applied to Rex and Donovan, not to Seth. We have no intention of harming him in any way, the way I see it, he did humanity a great favor by ridding the planet from somebody as ill-fated as Max. I can understand the confusion, but the idea of killing Seth didn't cross our minds. Seth didn't do anything wrong, quite the opposite he did exactly what would be expected of the mate of an alpha. He was very brave and his heroism saved the life of his mate." I felt my face get warmer and hid behind Jake's broad shoulders. I didn't consider myself a hero; I was still plagued by the fact that I took a life.

Daniel took a few steps towards me, Quil and Leah stood between him and us. "Seth can I ask you something?" I motioned for Leah and Quil to move aside so I could see his face.

"Of course."

"Did he suffer? How did he die?" Daniel was hungry for revenge, everybody could see it.

"Well he was about to kill Jake and I jumped pushing him against a boulder. He landed head first and in the time it took him to recover from the blow, I broke his neck. I don't know how much he suffered or if he experienced pain, but I can tell you that his cry when life was slowly draining out of him is something I'll never forget."

"Thank you Seth."

"I'm sorry for the misunderstanding. Jacob, please accept my apologies for all the pain and worry we caused you. You should be proud of your pack, the way each one of the rallied to protect your imprint is an example of how a pack should behave."

"Thank you Mark, words fall short in a tragedy like the one you're going through, but for what's worth we are sorry about your sister." It was true, in a situation like this words are of little importance but the feeling and the caring behind them is what makes them count.

"Thank you man, good bye."

As I watched the retreating forms I knew that we may find Mark again in our journey on this earth, but also knew we would never see Daniel again. Sam and Quil escorted Mark and Daniel out of the house and towards the garage so they could claim the two useless bags of bones that were sleeping in the garage, courtesy of two morphine shots. We needed all our guys in case there was a fight and couldn't afford to have anybody babysitting those idiots. As soon as all the voices outside of the house faded effectively letting us know they were far from us, Jake sat back against the headboard, letting go of the breath he was probably holding from the moment Mark and Daniel came in the house.

For three days we had been preparing to count our losses and right now we could celebrate. We were so drained of energy by the building tension that all the celebrating will have to wait. We felt the quiet gladness of all the unexpected blessings that came out of our shared fears. Our pack was closer than ever, having to come together for a common goal made us see how much we care for each other. Quil and Jake could work on rebuilding their friendship, I knew for a fact that Jake didn't judge him and would be completely supportive of anything Quil decides. We saw what the pack was made of, pure courage; the way they all rallied to protect me was humbling and overwhelming. Even Billy came on board in an effort to protect me and accepting me as his son.

For a moment Jake and I just looked at each other, the soaring joy of the new promise of a happily ever after swept over me. We laughed loud and long holding each other shaking hands. There were so many possibilities, all day I had been thinking there would be no future for us and now we have a bright and exciting future ahead of us. We could make a reality all our hopes and dreams; we could build a life together. No more worries, no more anger, no more sadness just two souls becoming one.

In a second I felt as my body left the bed and found myself perched on Jake's lap, his arms wrapped around my waist. "You're safe Seth, you see, I told you everything would work out." He kissed every part of my body he could reach, the joy in his heart coming out like a ray of light and bathing both of us with its warmth. He would've been jumping if he could. I just placed my hands on either side of his head and kissed him tenderly, at peace for the first time since this nightmare started.

"Yes Jake, we are both safe." We pressed our foreheads together, but didn't kiss each other like we usually would, we just smiled and sighed, allowing all the stress and uncertainty of the last week leave our bodies.

"I love you Ja.. Se.." We laughed when simultaneously we looked at each other and without even thinking we said I love you.

**I hope you enjoyed the chapter; there are only two more chapters left. The next chapter will be what you have all been waiting for, it may take me a little more time to write it, but don't worry I just want it to be perfect. **

**So you'll have something to look forward to, the title of the next chapter is "THE CLAIMING"**


	33. Chapter 33 The Claiming

**Hello my pretties! Here is the chapter you have been waiting for, some of you for over a year. As a gift to all the wonderful readers and especially the reviewers, I added a bonus chapter. Chapter 33 will be in Seth's POV, the bonus chapter (chapter 34) which will follow in a few days, will be everything you read here, but in Jacob's POV. That way you get to experience this most awaited event in both points of view. **

**Disclaimer: I do not own Twilight I wish I did, but I don't. I just get to have fun with my favorite characters. **

Chapter 33 The Claiming

After the Awani pack left La Push we all felt like a huge weight was lifted off our shoulders. We could enjoy life once again, there would always be the threat of the vampires, but after the last few days so filled fear, pain and worry I could honestly say the leeches didn't look so scary anymore. Facing the possibility of losing everything, my family, my friends and most importantly the man I loved, put everything into perspective.

It took Jake almost dying to push me over the edge and slap some sense into me. The cheesy line from most graduation speeches _Today is the first day of the rest of our lives _came to my mind, making me chuckle internally. In my case it was true, I had ahead of me a new life, not one that was imposed to me by a prophesy, magic or a set of rules, it was my decision. I fell in love voluntarily; it's impossible to make a heart to love anybody or to fall out of love and whoever says that, is lying. My reality was wonderful, facing and accepting what my soul was screaming to my heart was very freeing.

The pack enjoyed a well-deserved rest and my family stuck around helping us any way they could, from running errands to cooking and doing laundry. Billy was more than grateful to his in-laws for all their help. I was just happy that we were all getting along, for the first time in years there was no animosity between Billy and my family.

The guys would visit daily, sometimes all at once, with the exception of whoever was running patrol; every time they came the conversation would gravitate in the same direction, my future claiming. My face burned every time they approached the subject, especially since as it could be expected, they were not really sensitive about the subject and the inappropriate and immature comments were abundant. Everybody found it adorable anytime they would mention it and I would blush… fucking idiots. Each time they asked us when was the big event going to take place, Jake just looked at me, with longing and hope in his eyes. He knew it was my decision and respected me enough to understand it was my choice. Not even when we were alone he would ask me, I thought he would be insisting, but I was mistaken. Maybe in the same way this whole experience changed me, it had probably affected him too. Hopefully it gave him a little patience, because with each passing day I was more nervous.

I was not scared anymore, but couldn't help feeling anxious. While Jake slept I would sit on the bed doing research on the subject, but it was hard to find reliable information, most of it directed me to porn sites and Jake had prohibited me from going into those websites. He insisted that what was going to happen between us was pure and based on love, not lust. I guessed the big horn dog did learn something.

Exactly ten days after the attack, I returned to school to begin my junior year in high school. School had started three days before but Jake insisted that I needed more rest. I'm sure he just didn't want to be apart from me. Since the rumor in town was that he had a motorcycle accident, he needed to stay home all the time, even his boss believed he had broken a few bones in the accident. Jake's boss was a really decent man that truly cared for him; he promised that as soon as he was up to it, he could go back to work.

I was looking forward to a fantastic school year, Kim and I had similar schedules and spent a lot of time together. Even when I considered her my girlfriend we didn't talk too much; she was still too focused on fashion and shit like that, but now we shared a secret and that made us buddies. With the exception of Jake all the guys came back to school, I still tried to convince him to try to finish, but he was determined on working to provide for me.

After an exhausting day at school I was relieved to get home, I missed Jake and I knew he missed me. Every morning was the same routine we would wake up together since I insisted that he needed to stay in our room. We would kiss and say I love you, I promised myself I would tell him every chance I got, even though he assured me he heard me say it the first time, I will always regret not making it special for him. I would get in the shower while he prepared breakfast. We couldn't shower together in the mornings or else I would never get to school or be really late. Then came the hard part, saying good-bye; by the way Jake acted you would think I was going away forever. He would hug and kiss me until my lips swelled up, something I used to hate, but now I loved it. I knew he was scared shitless, after Mark told him about every alpha wanting to mount me, he was terrified of losing me.

I understood him, but it still pissed me off that he appointed all the guys as my official bodyguards. Every time I turned a corner I would see one of them watching me, sometimes they would walk me to my classes. At least now no bullies would mess with me, being out in high school was hard, but I had nothing to worry about, everybody was scared of the _hall monitors on steroids_ as I used to call them.

After slinging my backpack onto the floor by the door, I heard Billy's voice calling me from the kitchen. "Seth, is that you?"

"Yes Billy"

"Can you come in the kitchen; I need to talk to you." His tone was serious but he didn't sound angry.

"Sure Billy what's up?"

"You see Seth, I have a brother who lives in Reno and he has been begging me for almost two years to go visit him. I called him a few days ago and he made all the arrangements for me to fly there next Friday. Since Jake is not supposed to be driving, because of the story we told his boss, Quil is going to drive me to the airport."

"Billy, that's great and everything but why now?" I was very curious about the motivation for this sudden trip.

"As I said, he has been asking me for almost two years, but too much has been going on. Jake phased and took over as alpha, then he imprinted on you and as you know the last six months have been interesting." That was a nice way to put it, interesting, it had been a fucking mess, who was he trying to fool? At least now there was no trace of bitterness in his words, he made peace with Jake's imprinting on me and with our relationship.

"I also believe, Seth, that after everything that happened, Jake almost getting killed and the situation with the other pack, you two deserve some time alone, without the supervision of this old fart."

"Billy you don't have to go anywhere, this is your home."

"I know Seth, but you guys need your privacy." He had a mischievous twinkle in his eye, then the realization of the double meaning of his words hit me, and I blushed furiously.

"Billy, I…" I trailed off not knowing what to say, the embarrassment was so huge that I couldn't make my brain put together a coherent sentence.

"Seth, son, you made a solemn promise to a dying man and I know you are both ready for this step, not that it would make any difference, but I want you to know you have my blessing. Also Seth I don't remember thanking you."

"Thanking you for what Billy?"

"You remember the conversation we had in this same kitchen two months ago?"

"How could I forget? You told me how much you hated my guts." I remembered that day clearly, Billy told me the reasons why he despised me the way he did.

"And if remember correctly I asked you to let him love you, and now you've done more than that, you let him love you and you love him back. You not only tell him every chance you have, but you demonstrate it also. I may not be a wolf, but I don't need special hearing to know what happens in that room."

"Shit Billy I'm sorry, you really didn't need to hear any of that."

"Don't be embarrassed Seth, just the look of joy, hope and love I see in my son's eyes whenever he talks about you, the adoration he bestows on you every time you walk in the room, is enough to make my heart leap for joy. He is my son again; the happy boy that always had a smile on his face has grown to be a happy man. He is responsible, respectful and the anger he had brewing in his heart months ago had all but disappeared. There is only one thing left to make his life perfect and that one is your choice. Please don't feel I'm pushing you into anything, just like Jake, I'm giving you the choice, all the options and the opportunity."

"Thank you Billy, for … everything." In a sudden surge of emotion I hesitantly approached Billy and hugged him. I had never even shaken his hand before and now I was giving him a hug. His words hit me in the deepest recess of my heart. He gave me the proof of his total acceptance, like he said it didn't really make a difference in my relationship with Jake, but it felt really good to know he was happy with the special circumstances that surrounded him. I felt like a child who had done something very good and knows his father is pleased.

I had so much to think about, this was it, by Saturday morning I wouldn't be a virgin anymore and neither would Jake. My heart was dancing a crazy beat in my chest and my hands shook slightly while I was making a list of everything I needed. I wanted to plan everything; I needed this to be perfect. Fuck I needed to talk to Sam, Jake would not leave my side after he claimed me; Sam needed to cover Jake's patrols. I could just imagine the conversation; _hey Sam can you cover Jake's patrols for the next week? We're going to have sex on Friday and he won't be able to leave my side. _That's was just precious, I would rather shoot myself on the foot.

I also needed to get condoms, the only one I trusted enough was Quil, I knew he wouldn't make fun of me. I couldn't go to the store to get them, at the reservation store they didn't have Jake's size _extra-large_, I shuddered at the thought of that monster inside me. Since I was not allowed to leave the reservation, Quil will have to come through for me, I didn't want to get pregnant my first time.

Friday morning I said good-bye to Billy and wished him safe travels. Quil and I exchanged a co-conspiring look before boarding Jared's car to go to school. Once in the car I looked back and saw Jake standing by Quil's car but watching us, worry etched on his face, not for his father but for me. Since the attack his protection instinct had gone on overdrive and he hated being separated from me.

This day had to be the longest fucking day in the history of mankind, I was sure there had to be some type of conspiracy to keep me in school longer than usual. I watched the hours go by, the clock going tick… tick… tick…. at an unusually slow pace, or so it seemed. Shifting in my seat, unable to find a comfortable position, feeling like a fly on a cobweb, with nothing to do but wait for the damn bell to ring. If anybody asked me what was discussed in class today I had to admit I had no clue. There was only one thing on my mind. I was rehearsing in my mind everything that was going to happen; of course there were parts I couldn't predict and those filled me with fear and worry.

At last! The bell rang, its shrill sound announcing our freedom. I gathered my things and ran to Jared's car, waiting impatiently for him and Kim to show up; I must've looked like the Energizer bunny strung out on crack. I couldn't be still, the anxiety making me feel like I had thousands of ants crawling under my skin.

Thankfully, I would have time to get everything ready since Jake had been told his presence was required in an important council meeting in Old Quil's house. Neither one of us understood the urgency, but I had a theory I didn't share with Jake. I suspected Billy had something to do with this obviously needless meeting.

I got home only to find dinner already in the oven, chicken breasts with vegetables. I love Emily! Everybody was rallying for our cause tonight, trying to make it easier. It was a lot lighter than we usually ate but tonight's activities didn't lend themselves to us being sleepy and heavy. I ran to our room to change the bed linens and make sure the condoms and the lube were in the drawer of the nightstand. Holding the condoms made everything so real and I had to sit down, suddenly feeling I couldn't breathe. Tonight Jake and I were going to make love, tonight I would give myself fully to the man I loved, to the man who was willing to give his life for me. Composing myself I placed everything in the drawer and went to the bathroom to take a shower, I wasn't sure when Jake would get home and I still needed to make the dessert. It was nothing fancy, just a little something to remind Jake of his Seth.

As I was getting the dessert in the refrigerator Jake got home, I could tell he was not happy. Shit, hopefully my plans wouldn't go down the drain. "Babe what's with the face?" I asked hoping it was nothing serious.

"Nothing really, I'm just pissed that the first night we have just the two of us and they call me for a stupid meeting that made no sense, nothing important was discussed. I have no fucking idea why they called me, I just sat there angry and bored out of my mind. I could've been here with you and instead I was sitting in Old Quil's living room doing nothing." Yep, this had my father-in-law hand all over it; I was starting to like the guy.

"Well you're here now, and dinner is ready." I grabbed Jake's hand and he followed me to the kitchen where I already had the table set for two. His expression was priceless when he saw the amount of food I put on his plate, I had to bite the inside of my cheek to stop myself from bursting out laughing.

"Don't worry, I prepared a nice dessert." He didn't quite catch the double meaning of my words; he was too focused on the sad little plate in front of him.

After dinner we did the dishes together, I began to wash them, but Jake took over because I kept dropping everything. I tried to hide from him the fact that my hands were shaking, but I was sure he could hear my heart thumping in a crazy rhythm inside my chest.

"Love, why don't you go to the living room and I'll bring the dessert?" Jake nodded and went to the living room taking a seat on the sofa.

"Ok Jakey, close your eyes, the dessert is a surprise and if you open them you don't get any."

"Sure baby, just make sure to bring me a good piece of whatever you made, I'm still hungry."

Taking the small tray I walked to the living room and placed it on the side table closest to Jake. I climbed on the sofa and sat down on his lap facing him, with my legs on either side of his hips, effectively straddling his lower body. Immediately I felt him tense up, he reached forward and grabbed my ass hard, pulling me towards him and making me fall forward into his awaiting lips. He kissed me fiercely moaning into the kiss, the passion and fire of the kiss making me feel like I was melting into him.

He whimpered when I pushed myself away from his lips "Jake, if you don't behave you will not get any dessert."

"Seth, you are my dessert" Jake had no idea how true his words were.

"Keep your eyes closed and open your mouth" I grabbed one of the chocolate covered strawberries from the tray and brought it to his luscious lips. I ran the sweet fruit over his parted lips; his hot breath hitting my hand; it sent a jolt of electricity that went directly to my groin. He bit into it, chewing slowly while moaning in the most delightful way. He took his sweet time, like he knew the effect his actions were causing in me.

"Seth you're fucking evil, what are you doing? You know this is how you taste to me, chocolates and strawberries." Of course I remembered, luckily he would not catch on just yet.

"I may be evil, but you love me just the same, don't you?" I playfully jumped forward and bit his ear.

"I adore you baby." My lips found his temple placing then slow tender kisses on his eyelids, his nose and his lips. Moving slowly, I tickled his ear with the tip on my tongue, running it on the outer shell until I heard his ragged breathing. I left his ear and traveled down his neck kissing and nibbling on the sensitive skin, softly blowing on the spots my tongue touched, making him shiver.

"Seth what are you doing? You're going to kill me if your keep doing that."

"C'mon you know you like it."

"Fucking love it, can I open my eyes?"

"Not yet." I whispered into his ear making sure he could feel my hot breath inside it. I took another strawberry and placed it inside his mouth. He ate it greedily while I continued teasing his ear and kissing the skin behind it. I took the chance to attack his lips once again, sweet tender kisses at first, only to intensify them a minute later. I eased my tongue into his mouth and tasted every corner of his able mouth. He tasted so damn good, I could just spend the whole night kissing him, but I had other plans. Wrapping my hands around his neck I purposely moved so that the distinct bulge in his pants brushed against my own, grinding my hips against him. The wonderful friction was torture, but I welcomed it.

We rocked in unison and a noise that was between a gasp and a moan escaped his lips. He bit his lip, his cheeks flushed as he fought against his instincts. While rocking painfully slow on his lap, I brushed my lips against his, leaving barely any space between my lips and his plump parted ones. I didn't kiss him; just teased him letting him feel my warm breath on his overheated skin. For a minute he lost the battle against his instincts and in a swift movement claimed my lips, he tilted his head and pressed his lips passionately against mine. He bit my bottom lip, demanding entrance that I playfully denied, he growled assertively and I granted him entrance. Our tongues clashed against each other in a playful dance inside my mouth.

I wanted to touch him, to run my hands over his chest and his well-defined abdomen. To feel the power contained in the muscles that shaped his arms, allow my fingertips to run along the length of his muscular legs. I reached for the bottom of his shirt and pulled it off over his head. I couldn't contain myself and attacked his neck kissing, sucking, and nipping gently on the soft flesh. Stopping at his Adam's apple I placed my soft lips around the small bulge, sucking on it ever so lightly, swirling my tongue in a circular motion and eliciting a moan from his lips. Satisfied with the sounds that I was able to elicit from my mate, I moved down his neck and ran my tongue on his collarbone, feeling him shiver when the cold air in the room hit the moist area. My tongue left his neck and traveled down his chest leaving a trail of saliva, his hands were very busy massaging my ass and pulling me toward him to make our clothed erections rub against each other. I stopped at one of the two turgid buds on his chest, I lapped at it before circling it with my tongue, while rolling the other one gently between my thumb and pointer finger.

"Shit Seth I'm going to open my eyes." Said Jake in a husky voice.

"Go ahead love." He opened his eyes slowly, taking a few seconds to focus in the dim lighted room. When our gazes crashed into each other the sudden intake of air betrayed him, what he saw in my eyes kept him in awe and prevented him from looking away from me.

"My Seth, you look so fucking sexy, I've never seen so much need in your eyes." Jake had not seen all the stars in the universe, but that didn't make them any less real. He had never seen so much lust in my eyes, but that didn't mean it didn't exist. I lusted after him, I lusted after his body, his scent, his smile and I was convinced that after this night I would lust after him for the rest of my life.

"Baby you have no idea how much I want you right now, please be a good boy and shut up." He grinned and I resumed my ministrations. Moving from his chest I circled each one of his abdominal muscles with my tongue, all this while watching him with only my eyelashes to block my view. He was writhing in pleasure, invariably it didn't matter how I touched him; his reaction was almost explosive. I felt an immense pride, that only by kissing him I was able to overwhelm him.

I moved to his waist, right over his pants, I ran my tongue parallel to the fabric that made up the waist of his jeans; he wiggled in the sofa in an attempt to get his pants lower on his hips. I grabbed his swollen member over the pants and gave it a light squeeze. "Shit Seth! With all this fucking teasing you'll have to at least blow me or I will self-combust."

Smiling up at him I unfastened the button of his jeans and pulled down the zipper. He picked up his ass from the sofa to allow me to wiggle the pants down his legs, taking them and tossing them aside. As usual he had gone commando and was in front of me in all his naked glory. His cock standing proudly like a projection from his body signaling to the sky.

I massaged his erection while burying my hand inside my pants to grab my painfully hard member. My breathing quickened at the same speed his did, our hearts racing with the intense need of sex. In his face I could only read pleasure, his moaning unabashed. It filled my heart with joy to see him enjoying himself; I knew right then and there, that I could dedicate my life to give him pleasure.

I continued stroking his length, using the beads of pre-cum that were beginning to peep out his tip to make my hand slide easier. Forgetting completely about my own need, I concentrated on Jake, stroking him in slow and determined movements. I would stop every once in a while, to concentrate on the head which was glistening with his fluid. He was getting there; I could feel the slight tremors on his stomach and his arms. His moans were loud, his breathing deep and his heartbeat strong and fast. I absolutely loved giving him so much pleasure, I only wished I could make it last longer.

"Oh Seth….mmmm so good baby… I want more." Jake threaded his fingers on my hair and gently pushed my face towards the glistening head. I didn't need any more encouragement, but I wasn't done teasing him, I dragged my closed lips over his length slowly, enjoying every whimper, ragged breath and growl that came out of his chest. He started bucking against my mouth, demanding that I take him in my moist cave. Wrapping my lips on his length I went up and down a few times. I had been doing better in the art of fellatio and could get more of his magnificent manhood in my mouth. He seemed to be enjoying it, his moans coming out faster and louder.

I hollowed out my cheeks to get better suction; Jake cried out, his sweet voice is music to my ears; "Seth… my Seth … I love you." Continuing my delicious task, I bopped my head several times, taking it out of my mouth just to lick the tip and ran my tongue along the slit, tasting his pre-cum. I slid my hands on his thighs feeling the muscles under the taut skin.

By his breathing I knew he was very close, his moaning was continuous and loud. Jake never limited himself; he would be as loud as he felt like, with a total disregard to anybody within hearing range. He grabbed a chunk of hair from the top of my head and pushed my head against his cock almost painfully. Responding immediately I took him as far in as I could, struggling to swallow around the huge piece of muscle in my mouth. A minute later his body was shaking as the rhythmic spasms went through his body in waves of pleasure. I swallowed his seed avidly, without wasting even one drop.

Jake had the most adorable dreamy look in his face, his chest raising and falling as he was coming down from his orgasmic bliss. Creeping up his body I assumed my position on his lap, straddling his hips. I leaned over, wrapping my arms around his neck and kissing him gently on the lips. Moving my lips along his jaw I found his sweet spot and ran my tongue up and down the bluish line under his skin feeling him shiver at the contact.

"My Seth that feels awesome, but now it is your turn." He moved his hands to my waist to unbutton my pants, but I had to stop him, grabbing his hands I pulled them away from the zipper and placed them on my waist. A low growl of disapproval emanated from his chest. Burying my head on the crook of his neck I inhaled his scent, it always helped me calm down and right now I needed all the help I could get.

I dragged in a shaky breath, this was it the point of no return. In a sudden attack of cold feet I doubted my decision of giving myself to him, was I really ready for this? Trying to stall the inevitable I kissed him again, he grabbed my butt roughly making me grind against his now semi-erect member.

"What's wrong Seth? Your heart feels like it's going to jump out of your chest. Why are you shaking?" Shit, damn Jake and his wolf senses. I pushed my forehead against his chest and took a few deep breaths. I needed to see his eyes, to reassure him I was not rejecting him in any way. His eyes had a mixture of love, sadness and concern. I knew we both needed this; we earned the right to be happy.

"Jake, do you remember some time ago, when I told you we would make love only after I told you I was ready?" He nodded affirmatively while his heart jumped and joined mine in a frantic race. On reflex, I placed a hand on his chest to help him calm down and the other one on his cheek, he immediately leaned against the touch, lowering his gaze dreamily.

"Baby… I'm… I'm ready." his eyes went wide in excitement and surprise. Placing his hand over the one on his cheek, he looked at me with the most immeasurable look of love in his eyes.

Searching my own for any sign of deceit or doubt, probably asking himself if this was another one of my bad jokes. "Are you sure, Seth?" his voice shaky and unsure.

"Yes my love… I'm sure." Feeling another shudder attack me, I wrapped my arms around his neck and buried my head on his neck. Then we were moving, my legs around his waist as he carried me upstairs to our room. With each step I was coming closer to ending a chapter of my life and beginning a new one. I was leaving behind my childhood and was welcoming in my body the man I chose to give my heart to.

He stopped at the door and I lifted my head to see the reason for his hesitation, he smiled, lowering his head to my lips in a sweet tender kiss. Without breaking the kiss he laid me on my back, my head resting on the pillow. The combination of the soft light of the moon coming in through the window and the soft light of the lamp, making the perfect ambiance for our most memorable night.

Jake positioned himself on all fours over me, stretching his legs so only his bottom half was in contact with my clothed erection that was aching inside my jeans. He rolled up and down my body making sure not to put his full weight on me, the feeling was exquisite. Having a naked Greek god at my disposition was more than I deserved. He attacked my neck just like I had done earlier sucking and kissing to his delight, I was his.

Sitting back on his legs the way he looked at me was very confusing. I wondered what was wrong, he didn't want me? Did I make him wait too long and he lost interest? Seth Clearwater shut up! Jake loves you; he had waited for this mating for a long time. I questioned him with my eyes, too afraid to voice my concerns and be rejected. Placing his meaty hands flat on my stomach he inhaled sharply before speaking. "Seth I need you to know that there is nothing in this world I want more than making you mine right now. But I need to give you two facts baby; I won't take you while you are in the dark about these two things." He looked at me and a firm bob of my head encouraged him to continue. "I'll be as gentle as I can but my wolf has been denied for too long and he might take over. I have better control and will do my best to submit him, but he might win and baby… it will hurt." I knew it was going to hurt, nothing new there.

"The second is that for the first time we cannot use condoms and there is the risk I will get you pregnant." This was very unsettling, I was ready to make love, but I was most definitely not ready to be a parent.

"Why can't we use them Jake? I bought several packages, they are in the drawer." He glanced towards the drawer I was referring to, before turning his gaze back towards me.

"Baby I need our scents to mix for the claiming to be complete, it will only be for the first time, I promise." He looked pleadingly at me; I looked away from him in the direction of the window, a million thoughts running through my mind in an instant. He didn't move, but with the corner of my eye I saw him begin to deflate. He looked defeated, his shoulders slumped and his gaze fixated on my stomach.

"Jakey I love you more than my own life, I know we'll spend the rest of our lives together-"I began to say before Jake interrupted me.

"I know, you don't want to be a parent right now-"Jake said sadly, now it was my turn to interrupt him.

"Will you let me finish?" he nodded and I continued. "I know we'll spend the rest of our lives together, if we do it with a little one beside us, I'm fine with it." Jake's look went from sad and despondent to happy and excited in zero point three seconds flat.

He attacked my lips in a ravishing kiss, possessing my mouth and my neck, a small preview of what was to come. He grabbed the bottom of my t-shirt and yanked it off my head in one swift motion. Lowering his head he pressed his face against the pulse point on my neck and inhaled deeply. His mouth opened slightly and he trailed down from my neck to my collarbone with his tongue, slowly going in the direction of my chest. Placing butterfly kisses all over my chest he stopped when his mouth found the taut bud and gently tugged at it, nibbling on the cooper skin. He rolled my other nipple between his fingers eliciting a moan from my lips. I arched my back bringing my chest closer to his face, encouraging him to lick the delicate little bud. I shuddered with pleasure and moaned deeply.

His mouth trailed lower, tasting the skin of my abdomen, leaving a trail of saliva around each muscle that formed the hills and valleys of my stomach. He unfastened the button and got the zipper open. Jake slid the jeans past my hips but stopped, hesitating slightly and looking nervous. This was also new to him; we were both entering an uncharted territory, with only our love to guide us.

After taking off my pants he moved his fingers down my chest until he reached the waistband of my boxers. Jake traced the shape of my erect member with his finger and cupped my balls through the fabric of my underwear. I couldn't help my reaction and started bucking against his hand, trying to increase that wonderful friction.

"Aren't we an eager little puppy?" He slid his fingers into the top of the waistband of my underwear and I couldn't help but whimper like a frightened little puppy. He tugged on them slowly until my cock sprung up in full attention. He moved it down my body tearing them off and tossing them on the floor.

Jake sat back once again but this time he looked in total awe his eyes wide, a slight blushing on his russet skin and his cock so hard it could bat a home run.

"So beautiful, my Seth." I had heard him say that same line probably hundreds of times, but today it had special meaning. I was not only baring my body to him, I was also baring my soul. I laid on our bed exposed in body and spirit, ripe for the picking.

Jake lightly caressed the skin on my legs until he reached the junction of my thighs. With the tips of his fingers he traced over the bluish lines that ran all the way from my cock making me bend my knees and moan loudly. He leaned forward and caught my cock in his mouth swallowing it whole. It was so wonderful to feel my heated member be surrounded by an even hotter mouth. He bopped his head a few times and that got my juices flowing, Jake smiled onto my cock when my loud moaning hit his ears. Just like him I was not limiting myself, to hell with everybody, if anybody heard me, so be it. Again I arched my back trying to bury myself even deeper in his mouth. Taking each one of my balls into his mouth he sucked them gently, like they were the most delectable confection known to man. His eyes fluttered closed looking in ecstasy; the vibrations of his moaning almost making me become undone right at that instant.

I whined submissively, like the puppy I was when he stopped and pulled away from me, I wanted more, I needed him. Jake responded by violently grabbing my hips and rubbing our erections together. Instinctively I felt my hips thrust up; Jake moaned softly and licked his lips. He slid his hands behind me and fondled my ass possessively. I watched him in rapt fascination, the way his muscles contracted and the slight sheen of sweat that was starting to cover his body was almost hypnotic.

"I love you so much Jake." The words coming out strained as I struggled to control my breathing.

"I love you too my angel." He resumed his grinding, with me responding by bucking my hips each time.

While grinding our hips together he bent forward taking my lobe between his lips and applying the most delicious pressure, his lips trailed down while nipping and sucking all the way down. I threaded my fingers through his soft locks, when all the different sensations attacked me. The weight of his body on me, dominating me, his soft kisses on my neck making me shiver in delight, his hands massaging each one of my globes letting me know I belonged to him. A growl erupted from his throat, a reassurance that he was in charge.

Our hands explored the exposed skin, our kissing becoming frantic as our cocks rubbed together. The scent of arousal was heavy in the room filling our nostrils with its heady scent. I gripped his skin in hunger, like the starving man I was.

"Jake my Jake, make me yours, I need you." I writhed under his body, not embarrassed of begging to be taken.

Jake's response to my demand was to sit back and run the tips of his fingers on my body from the base of my neck ending up on my thights, waking up every nerve ending on their path. He stretched his body to reach the drawer and extract the tube of lube I had placed inside earlier. This was becoming very real and I felt my stomach tie itself in a knot.

Slipping next to me he pulled me on my side and kissed me deeply, his strong arms surrounding me. I heard the distinctive sound of the top of the tube as he opened it and my response surprised even me. The light trembling I had been feeling increased in strength to the point it became violent, making the whole bed shake. My mouth was dry, my arms weakly draped around his neck. My nerves betrayed me, I was freaking out big time, to the point I felt a few tears escape from my shut eyes. I buried my face on his chest trying to hide my tears from him. With his finger he lifted my face to make me look at him, while his other hand traced small circles on my back.

"I know you're scared my Seth, I am too. There is no rush; we have the rest of our lives baby. Just know that I will be very gentle and try to minimize your discomfort, I love you so much, please trust me." Jake guided my head to his chest where I listened to the steady beat of his heart. He held me until my shaking subsided.

Feeling calmer I lifted my head, only to be met by the most loving gaze I had ever seen. "I trust you Jake, just go slow please." He nodded wordlessly and peppered my face with soft tender kisses. Feeling something cold and wet on my exposed behind made me tense up again, he noticed and resumed his movements on my back while whispering loving words.

He started massaging the skin around my hole probably trying to get it to relax; with a lube covered finger he traced circles around it. I felt a steady pressure on my hole as he pushed a finger inside ever so slowly, it didn't hurt and didn't bother me one bit, since he had inserted the tip of his fingers inside me in more than one occasion. But this time was not one of those times, it was not just the tip. I stiffened in his arms when he kept going at a slow and steady pace, it wasn't painful just a slight burning. He moved his finger in and out burying it deeper each time.

When he could move his finger in and out easily, he pulled it out almost completely. Pushing again into my body I felt the known burning pressure intensify, he had added a second finger and was pushing them inside me. I dug my nails onto his shoulders and my sharp intake of air made him stop. "Are you ok puppy? I'm sorry this is uncomfortable, but I need to prepare you."

"It's ok Jakey, I'm just very nervous, that's all." I lifted my head and smiled reassuringly at him, he responded by giving me a chaste kiss on the lips while resuming with the task at hand. After his two fingers were deep within me, he began moving in and out separating them, moving them in a scissor like fashion, to stretch me even further.

It was starting to feel good, feeling that part of my body filled in such a new way was very pleasurable and exciting. "Oh Jake, yes baby, yes!" My words gave Jake the green light to add a third finger, this time there was pain, but I tried to push it to the back of my head and concentrate on his lips as he kissed and nipped my neck.

I felt him pull out of me and raised my gaze to meet his; he seemed nervous, his uneasiness a perfect match to mine. I watched him as he squirted a generous amount of lube on his hand and gulped loudly when he massaged it on his cock.

"Get on your back, love." I knew he would want to take me with me on my back, this way he could look at me while he claimed me.

I rolled onto my back and fisted the sheet under me, not knowing what to do with my hands. I averted his gaze embarrassed, feeling extremely vulnerable. Jake scooted himself so he was kneeling between my legs. Running his lube covered hands on my thights I threw my head back when he rubbed my sweet spot. Taking one of my legs he wrapped it around his waist and positioned himself so his cock was directed toward my entrance.

He grabbed his cock at the base and rubbed the thick head on my entrance. I felt my whole body pulsing and my heart beating so fast it could jump out of my chest at any moment. He pushed inside my hole, slowly trying to coax the sphincter to relax enough so the spongy head could slip in. My reaction was to pull back, but his grip on my hip kept me firmly in place. Pressing against my entrance he pushed further into the too tight space. I cried out in pain flinging my head to the side when I felt a sudden pang of pain as the head slipped in, completely disappearing inside me.

I grabbed his biceps trying to make him still his movements, my breath escaping me faster than I could regain it. I was terrified when his gaze met mine; his eyes were black, no distinction between the iris and the pupil. Shit, his wolf was in control, no this couldn't be happening, I wanted to give myself to Jake not to his wolf.

"Jake your eyes…" I was beginning to tear up, the fear invading me and dominating my thoughts.

"Baby don't be afraid; he is here claiming his mate, but it's not in control, I am." The obvious scowl on his face contradicted his words.

He pushed deeper inside me, I hissed loudly and gritted my teeth waiting for the pain to subside. Inch by agonizing inch he pushed in, as slowly as he could, only to resume his movements when I nodded. Tears rolled down my cheeks as the burning pain that was so new to me attacked me. I didn't know how much I could handle, I was reaching my limit.

With the pad of his thumb he cleaned the tears away. He looked apologetically at me "Seth, if it's too much we can stop, I can't stand to make you suffer baby."

"I know we can stop Jake, thank you for suggesting it. Even though it's hurting you need this and so do I, just make sure to make me feel good once the worst is over, ok?" I smiled weakly at him and when he wouldn't move, I pushed him towards me with the leg I had draped around his waist. He buried himself balls deep inside me making me see stars and not in a good way, but I was determined and my stubborn self wouldn't back down.

Sweat was pouring down his forehead and dripping on my chest. He was controlling the urge to thrust, giving me time to adjust. I was still surprised that all his manhood fit inside me. My ass muscles convulsed around his thickness, he felt gigantic. I knew he was big, but now that he was inside me the feeling was unreal. He bent forward placing his elbows on the bed and captured my lips with his, kissing me deeply, possessing every part of my body he could.

My hands trailed up and down his back, feeling the power contained on the bulging muscles there. We were both shaking and I wasn't sure if either one of us was enjoying this. When the pain subsided substantially I told Jake to move, but to start slow. I was ready for him to fuck me. He slowly started to move in and out of my ass, sinking deeper into me with each stroke.

"I love you so much my Seth." He whispered on my ear.

"Mine."

"Yours." My answer made him purr in delight.

"All mine." This statement came out like a growl. The animal side of him coming through in his words.

After a few minutes I was bucking against him and we moved together easily. Jake reached down between us and took hold of my deflated member, almost flaccid after the painful intrusion. He moved his hand along its length and all it took was a few strokes to have me at full attention once again. Still sheathed inside me he sat back and continued stroking me while with his other hand he rubbed my sweet spot. All the feelings coming at me at once, made me moan in pleasure, all the previous discomfort all but forgotten.

Jake was thrusting rhythmically but still gentle, changing his position according to my reaction. He then hit a spot inside me that made me see stars once again, but this time it was the good kind, who was I kidding? It was the awesome freaking fantastic kind of stars. My moans were mixed with so many dirty words; some of them I didn't even remember ever saying before. Through my eyelashes I could see Jake's mouth twisted up in a soft smirk, apparently he liked it when his puppy was a dirty boy.

"Shit Jake, right there baby, hit that same spot, please." I was begging, moaning like a two cent whore but I didn't care. Lifting my upper body slightly, I attacked his nipples, licking and biting them to my complete delight. My moans were loud and obscene but that only seemed to turn on Jacob even more. Even with Jake's heated body over me, goose bumps rose on my skin. I could feel him pulsing inside my passage, feeling my ass clench around his member at it slid in and out of me. His face was a above mine looking down, he looked so damn sexy, small droplets of sweat forming on his forehead one after the other, his eyes half lidded and his luscious lips parted to allow his breath to come out in fast and sharp pants.

I lifted my legs and placed them on his shoulders, after a few tries he found that same spot again. My hips would leave the bed to meet each of his thrusts. I dug my dull nails onto his sides moaning his name and a series of obscenities each time he touched the sensitive bundle of nerves inside me.

"Seth, you're mine."

"Fuck Jake, yes I am."

"You belong to me, only me."

"Only yours baby, forever."

"Say my name, say the name of your dominate."

"Jacob."

"Louder!" Jake demanded, all but screaming.

"JACOB!" He smiled looking proud. I knew he dreamt about having me under him screaming his name as he fucked me. This moment was a dream come true for him.

"Damn it Seth, you feel so good, you're so fucking tight."

"Feels good on my side too, babe." He rammed into me with total abandon, my words affecting the smidgen of control he was holding on to. My insides shaping to him with each assault on my young body.

"Ahhh fuck Jake, fuck me!" I felt him pull out of me with a rude squelching sound. I whimpered loudly and studied his face trying to find the reason for this sudden change.

"Get on your hands and knees Seth I need to mount you, to fuck you like the beasts we are." I turned to my stomach, Jake as impatient as ever, grabbed my hips and pulled them up so my ass was sticking up in the air. I was embarrassed, feeling so exposed, but pushed the embarrassment aside and spread my legs a little further to accept his girth. Resting my head on my forearms I relaxed and waited for Jake to take command of the situation.

"So sexy, all mine, my Seth." He grunted.

I didn't have to wait long as I felt the tip on my entrance and Jake plunged his cock into my depth without any hesitation. I cried out in a mixture of pleasure and pain, he was going deeper into me than he had so far. He pulled out almost completely and slammed fully back in. His thrusts were deep and each time he would hit that wonderful spot deep inside me. I arched against him grinding my buttocks against his groin, urging him deeper.

His cock moved with ease in and out, Jake would withdrew and then thrust, I keened out at the exquisite sensation. Shit if I had known it was going to feel this good, we would've done it a lot sooner. I could've sworn I felt him get bigger and harder inside my tight channel.

I felt his hand flat on the small of my back pushing down, making me separate my legs even more so he could go deeper inside me. "Jake, fuck me harder… deeper." I was begging him for more, I was begging Jacob Black to fuck me. Any resistance evaporating with the scorching heat propagating from our joined sexes. My bones melted and I submitted completely, I was his to do with whatever he wished.

"Say my name Seth."

"Jacob."

"What am I?"

"My mate and my lover."

"That's not what I want to hear, what am I?" Jake was screaming now.

"My dominant." as I said this Jake slowed down and pushed in harder making my eyes roll back in my head. I tossed my head back as he kept abusing my prostate.

The warmth of his skin felt wonderful against my back, his lips trailing up and ending up on the back of my neck. He was fucking me mercilessly; moving like the fury of a winter storm. Jake's caresses were breathtaking and his passion unmatched. In our bed there was no space for pleasantries, we had waited too long and our bodies were starved for sex.

"Seth you are mine, forever mine, bear your neck to me in submission, now!" I moved my head giving him total access to the right side of my neck. Jake started sucking the spot where the neck meets the shoulder and a shudder ran all over my body at the realization of what he was doing; he was going to mark me. He was preparing the portion of my skin that will forever bear his mark, one that would never disappear.

"Mine, mine, mine, mine." Jake sounded like he was in a trance; he kept licking and sucking my skin like our lives depended on it. I felt the top half of my body leave the bed, when he wrapped his arm around my waist and pulled me towards him. We were both kneeling on the bed, his body shaping into mine, his cock buried deep inside me. He didn't miss a beat and kept pounding my prostate again and again. Like a spear attacking my core. The unbelievable power behind each thrust making my whole body move forward, if he didn't hold me I would have been falling forward with each slam inside me.

While he held me up with one arm, his grip tightened on my hip. He kept thrusting in and out, nonstop, going harder and deeper with each trust. Flesh slapping against flesh as he impaled me repeatedly, going at a brutal pace. Helpless whimpers escaping my lips with each thrust, his lips working furiously on my neck tenderizing the soft flesh.

"I'm so close Jake."

"I know baby, you're gripping me so hard, you feel so good."

"Baby, please, touch me." he moved the hand he had on my hip and grabbed my painfully swollen member, I needed some release, I was desperate for it. He stroked me haltingly, his own need becoming overwhelming. My hands drifted up to his hair, tugging at it gently

I knew Jake was close too, his movements becoming frantic and not as rhythmic, but still very pleasurable. He pounded himself into me at an inhuman speed, drawing choked whines from me. I felt that wonderful coil inside me winding itself to the point of no return.

"JAKE!" My body began to shake beginning with my sex and washing to my limbs. Wave after wave of ecstasy, rolled over and through me. As my climax took possession of my body, the heat inside me was threatening to burn me alive. Like lava scorching me from the inside out. My body shook and trembled as pleasure pulsed through it. I grabbed a fistful of his hair and pulled him towards my neck giving him permission to mark me as his for the rest of our lives.

I felt Jake's hot breath on my neck seconds before he bared his sharp canines and broke the surface of the skin, savagely digging into my flesh. In that instant my orgasm reached its highest point and my seed left my body as creamy white ribbons, ending up on the bed. Jake followed me, his shout of completion reaching my ears as he came deep inside me. I could feel his engorged cock bathing my insides with its thick creamy seed.

When the spasms of sexual rapture invaded our bodies, shock overtook me. At the most unbelievable sensation ever, like one million stars exploding inside my body, the heat of a thousand suns emanating from the point where we became one. For an instant it was like we could hear each other thoughts and what made it even more incredible, we could feel the presence of our wolves. It started as a wind-like sensation on the edge of our consciousness. Then they filled each other's mind clear as a mid-day conversation. Every sensation, feeling and emotion we felt overpowering our shared consciousness. Jake's wolf finally appeased by having claimed his mate. My wolf, my conscience, overjoyed, satisfied and sated. I knew I wanted more of him, all of him. I wanted his strength, his protection, his love and his dominance and after this moment he knew it also.

**There was a lot of lovin' in this chapter, please show me some love and review.**


	34. Chapter 34 The Claiming part 2

**Hello everybody! As promised here is the bonus chapter, I hope you enjoy reading these events through the eyes of the alpha. There is only one more chapter after this and it will be posted next week. **

**I want to thank all the readers for sharing this experience with me. To those of you who encouraged me with your reviews, your alerts and your messages I love you all.**

_By the way, any time you see this font its Jake's wolf._

**Disclaimer: I do not own Twilight, it belongs to Stephenie Meyer. I just invite the wolves to come and have fun because, let's be honest in the book she didn't do them justice. **

* * *

><p>Chapter 34 The Claiming (part 2)<p>

Jacob POV

Driving home after the meeting at Old Quil's gave me a few minutes to calm down. I was so fucking pissed; I spent the last twenty minutes of the meeting controlling the urge to rip their fucking heads off. The first night Seth and I get to spend together by ourselves and these people mess it up calling me for a supposedly important meeting. It was nothing that couldn't wait, what do I fucking care if they want to buy new chairs for the community center or paint the fence around the pre-school? They were interfering with my time with Seth and that was just unacceptable.

Just thinking of Seth brought a smile to my face. He had been so amazing through this whole ordeal. Taking care of me, going as far as bathing and feeding me, even though I could do it by myself, he said it was his turn to take care of me. We had been getting closer each day, we were doing pretty good before the attack, but this nightmare gave us that extra push we desperately needed. Now Seth was proving to be the loving partner I knew he could be.

When I got home the anger just melted away, waiting for me was the most beautiful creature in the world, with his sweet smile and playful eyes. Seth had been acting strange since my father announced he was going to visit my uncle. I didn't know what was bothering him so much, but I had a feeling that it had something to do with the fact he was afraid of being alone with me. I knew he loved me, there was no doubt about that, but he was very scared of the physical aspect of our relationship. Guilt invaded me at the thought, that probably all the times I attempted to take him against his will affected him more than he cared to share. I tried to get some information from Quil since I caught Seth on the phone with him in two occasions, but Quil wouldn't budge, not even when I threatened him with a beating for talking to my submissive without my permission.

My mouth began to water as I caught the wonderful aroma in the house; there was a chicken dish in the oven and some kind of vegetables. But the most wonderful scent of all was the sweet chocolate and strawberries scent of my mate. Mmmm I wished I could sink my teeth into my little mate, so scrumptious. Fuck! Down boy, I needed to control my thoughts if I wanted my puppy to survive the night unscathed.

The food tasted wonderful, but it was a shame there was so little of it; Seth probably miscalculated and didn't prepare enough food. But it was fine; I was not going to waste this night being grumpy because of dinner. It was just the two of us playing house for a week, I was not going to ruin it. Maybe I could even ask the good doctor to write Seth a note, so I could keep him home with me for the whole week. Since Mark told me any alpha would want Seth, I've been terrified of anybody hurting him. Every morning after he left for school, I would just phase and patrol around the school trying my best to stay downwind so he wouldn't catch my scent. I also gave orders to the pack to protect him inside the school, I knew he didn't like the constant supervision, but he had no choice but accept it, after all it was for his own good.

I was very concerned when after dinner we began to do the dishes and Seth kept dropping everything. There was definitely something going on. I caught sight of his shaking hands and confirmed my suspicion; he was scared of being alone with me. I wanted to hold him and comfort him, but decided against it, not wanting to scare him even more. I took over washing the dishes while he cleaned the table and countertops.

"Love, why don't you go to the living room and I'll bring the dessert." Even though his words were calm, his heart was thumping loudly when he asked me to wait for him in the living room. Trying my best to help him calm down, I did as he said and sat down quietly waiting for him. I heard him open the refrigerator and the aroma of chocolate filled the room, the scent made me yearn for my puppy, to taste the sweet chocolate flavor of his skin.

"Ok Jakey, close your eyes, the dessert is a surprise and if you open them you don't get any," Said Seth from the kitchen.

"Sure baby, just make sure to bring me a good piece of whatever you made, I'm still hungry."

I remembered I was alone in house with my puppy for the first time since he accepted me and my cock sprang into action, the head pushing against the zipper. I made a monumental effort to push to the back of my mind all sex related thoughts. But it was hard; I was alone with a sexy as fuck guy that I craved more than oxygen. I was getting all these weird vibes from him, but it was probably my mind playing tricks on me.

His body was in front of me, stopping for a minute before taking his place on my lap with his legs on each side of my body. Almost as a reflex I grabbed his ass and pulled him towards me. Shit! My resolve lasted less than five minutes, he must have been so scared of my reaction, but having his weight on my lap awoke the beast within me. Since I recovered from the attack and started sleeping with Seth, my wolf had been relentless and downright cruel, pushing me to take Seth without his consent. More than once I had to escape from the room in the middle of the night and go for a run, when the need to be inside him became unbearable. I hadn't come all this way to spoil everything by taking him against his will. I promised myself I wouldn't rape him, I came close too many times, something that I would always regret.

His response to my kiss put me at ease; he basically melted in my arms, responding to the kiss with the same fervor and passion I felt. I whimpered like an idiot when his lips left mine. "Jake, if you don't behave you will not get any dessert" He had no idea how hard I was working to control myself since what I really wanted was his ass on a silver platter.

"Seth, you are my dessert." Oh yes, my Seth could satisfy the biggest sweet tooth ever, not that I would ever allow that, he was mine.

"Keep your eyes closed and open your mouth." He was being so playful, I love this aspect of his personality; he was able to put a smile on my face under any circumstance. I felt him shuffle slightly and he started teasing my lips with something cold, by the aroma I knew it was a chocolate covered strawberry. My little gremlin was being so bad and evil, but two could play that game. I bit the fruit and chewed it slowly, even though I couldn't see him, I knew my moans of satisfaction were eliciting all sort of reactions on my imprint. I could feel his rod getting harder, pushing against my thigh and the heat emanating from his body increasing with each passing minute.

"Seth you're fucking evil, what are you doing? You know this is how you taste to me, chocolates and strawberries." His light chuckle assured me he was doing all this in purpose, he was torturing me. I couldn't understand his motivation but still liked it all the same.

"I may be evil, but you love me just the same, don't you?" Seth would never know how much I loved him, even if we lived five thousand years, I would love him more each day.

"I adore you baby" My Sethy was my life, my universe. I had loved him for a long time, but since he accepted us, that feeling had grown to incredible levels. I wanted to protect him and love him forever.

Oh shit… my mind went blank when he started kissing my temple, my eyelids, my nose and ending up on my lips. The smidgen of control I was holding onto almost abandoning me when I felt his hot tongue on my ear. I could picture his pink tongue peeking out between his soft lips and licking the outer shell of my ear. I needed to take a shuddering breath to anchor myself on the sofa and not jump him.

"Seth what are you doing? You're going to kill me if your keep doing that." Apparently it was not enough that I had a serious case of blue balls, he was going for the kill me with all his delicious teasing.

"C'mon you know you like it."

"Fucking love it, can I open my eyes?" I really didn't need his authorization, I was the dominant in this relationship and if somebody needed to ask permission was Seth, not me. But my puppy was being so good, teasing me, making me feel special; I couldn't be a jerk to him, not now, not ever.

"Not yet." He whispered in my ear, his hot breath hitting it, bouncing off and ending up in my groin. If it was even possible I felt myself getting even harder. If I didn't get some release I swore I was going to explode in thousands of little pieces. Seth had his arms around my neck and kept grinding his clothed erection against mine in the most erotic way. His kiss started soft and tender only to transform into a passionate fiery kiss. I bit his bottom lip and he responded with a groan of mixed pleasure. Taking the opportunity I slipped my tongue into his mouth. Our tongues battled, devouring him with open mouthed kisses that he met with untamed and raging passion.

We rocked in a delicious dance that made me feel like we were in the ocean and the waves were rocking us seductively. The teasing was reaching unbearable levels, he grazed my lips with his own, his hot sweet breath hitting my face, he wouldn't even kiss me. I couldn't stand it any longer, I made peace with not having his body yet, but I was not going to accept being denied his lips. It took just a growl from me for him to open his mouth, he complied; Seth had no choice.

He reached for the bottom of my shirt and ripped it off over my head. Seth kissed, licked and nibbled my Adam's apple his lips working in a meticulous fervent pattern. When his tongue left my neck en route to my chest the need to feel him became unbearable and I massaged his ass, pulling him toward me to provoke that wonderful friction.

"Damn Seth I'm going to open my eyes." I couldn't resist anymore, one of my senses was being deprived, my whole body needed to be engaged in everything related to Seth.

"Go ahead love." Answered Seth, in a seductive bedroom voice that I barely recognized as his. It took my eyesight a few seconds to focus, but when it did I gazed in amazement at the sight before me. As always my Seth looked beautiful, but what caught my attention were his eyes, they were a dream come true. For the first time I could see real lust behind those gorgeous gray eyes. Arousal flared on his face, pupils dilated, and light flushing from his neck up. I couldn't look away; I didn't want to look away, fearing that if I did, it would disappear in a cloud of smoke.

"My Seth, you look so fucking sexy, I've never seen so much need in your eyes." My words failing to express the admiration I felt at that moment.

"Baby you have no idea how much I want you right now, please be a good boy and shut up." I felt my lips curl up on the corners at his audacity, but wouldn't let him see how much he amused me. I wondered how much he really wanted me. Would he make us stop as he had always done in the past or would he allow his heart to lead the way? Seth traced the contours of my abdomen with his tongue making me writhe in pleasure. Anything he did to me was special; he could only be holding my hand, but the simple contact of our interlaced fingers would send an electric current all through my body.

"Shit Seth! With all this fucking teasing you'll have to at least blow me or I will self-combust." He couldn't leave me just like that, it would be cruel. My body craved him in the worse possible way and his actions were making it very hard for me to stay in control. He removed my pants swiftly, I felt myself smirk at the look in Seth's eyes; his gaze was fixated on my erect member. His pink tongue peeking between his parted lips to moisten them. I wished I could read his mind, to see myself through his eyes.

I leaned back and enjoyed myself as Seth's massaged my cock playfully. My puppy was so fucking sexy and he didn't even know it, his lips parted to allow his soft pants to come out, his eyes half lidded and his hand working its magic on my swollen member. Just the fact that it was him touching me, taking me to high levels of pleasure. Pre-cum was escaping freely from the slit and I shook from head to toe when he took a few drops to use them as lubricant. Seth was going slow, stopping every once in a while to play with the head. The best part was that he was enjoying it, giving me pleasure voluntarily.

My release was imminent, feeling the tremors begin to take shape as waves of pleasure from deep within me. Fuck! I wanted more, after all that teasing I couldn't settle with a fucking hand job. I wanted his mouth, to feel his lips around my shaft, his able tongue licking the lengths of my cock only stopping to lick the slit, to feel the pressure as he sucked me and hear him moan as he swallowed my seed.

"Oh Seth….mmmm so good baby… I want more." I gently pushed his head towards my painfully swollen member and he complied immediately. No arguments, no questions, he obeyed my wordless command without delay, the way it should be. Even now he continued with his teasing and I started bucking against his mouth to let him know it was time to work.

Everything Seth did felt heavenly, sensing my orgasm he increased the pressure by sucking hard and fast. I cried out "Seth… my Seth … I love you!" He responded by increasing his speed and suction. I was so fucking close; I heard the most scintillating moan escape from his lips as he tasted the pearls of pre-cum that were spilling off. Knowing he was enjoying himself as much as I was, sent me over the edge. I came hard spilling all of me into his throat; he swallowed all my fluid without wasting a drop.

I sat back coming down from my orgasmic bliss, my whole body feeling rubbery. My release had been so intense, all the previous teasing working its magic in my body. Seth straddled me again, his small arms around my neck and his able tongue working its magic on my sweet spot. What was he thinking? Apparently he didn't want to be a virgin by Saturday morning, if this was the case I had no objections, but I doubted it. He had made it very clear that he was not ready for sex, which made his behavior seem even stranger.

"My Seth, that feels awesome, but now is your turn." I didn't want to be selfish, he had given me pleasure, and it was fair that he would get some too. Even though he was very shy about it, he was still a teenager with a truck load of hormones that worked in his favor or against him at times. When I tried to take his pants off he rejected me, moving my hands to his waist. I couldn't contain the growl of displeasure for this action. He was not only going against my wishes, he was rejecting me; I was so fucking confused it was not even funny.

Seth breathing was shaky and all through his body I could feel a slight tremor. He didn't need to be so scared of me. I thought I had proved to him that I was more than capable of controlling my wolf. I could almost see the gears moving in his head, something that always fascinated me about Seth, his ability to block everything and be deep in thought. He was debating with himself about something, shit should I ask him? As I was opening my mouth to ask him what the hell was going on, Seth sealed his lips with mine. My question all but forgotten, I grabbed his ass possessively and made him grind himself on my semi-deflated cock.

"What's wrong Seth? Your heart feels like it's going to jump out of your chest. Why are you shaking?" For several minutes he just sat there looking into my eyes, like he was examining me. What was he looking for?

"Jake, remember some time ago, when I told you we would make love only after I told you I was ready?" With this simple sentence Seth sent my heart in a wild spiral. Trying to help me calm down, he placed one warm hand on my chest and the other one on my cheek. As always his touch was like a refreshing balm on my heated skin, bringing comfort and pleasure.

"Baby… I'm… I'm ready." Was he saying what I thought he was? This had to be a cruel joke. No way, he isn't ready for that. He didn't want to, he is scared. A million thoughts going through my head all at once, incredulity seized me, nevertheless I was hopeful. I loved him so much, I needed to be with him, to be one with him and I knew he felt the same way. Did he crave my body the same way I craved his? Was this really happening? I had to make sure.

"Are you sure, Seth?" I didn't even recognize my own voice, why did I sound so pathetic? _You sound pathetic because you're an idiot that keeps forgetting he is a fucking alpha, this should've been taken care of a long time ago._ Shut up, I am an alpha but I'm also human I'm not a fucking monster like you, so shut up!

I had been waiting for this for six months, dealing with the demands of my wolf and trying to win his heart at the same time. If he was joking I swore it would be hell to pay, I would not hurt him, but I wasn't sure about anything else.

"Yes my love… I'm sure." It dawned on me, this was why he had been acting strange, this was why he was so nervous. I wondered if my father knew about his plans and that's why he left, to give us privacy. If that was the case I owed the old man, big time. I didn't need any more confirmation; his voice even though was shaky sounded certain of his decision.

Walking upstairs with Seth in my arms was surreal. He felt so light in my arms, his legs wrapped around my waist and his gorgeous face buried on my neck. His whole body was shaking, his nerves getting the best of him. With each step I was coming closer to the realization of the dream I had since imprinting six months ago. I was coming closer to claiming Seth.

Reaching our room I hesitated for a minute, the room looked impeccable. Crisp linens on the bed, not a speck of dust to be seen anywhere. Seth made an effort to make everything special for us. Even nature was conspiring with him, allowing the mysterious and romantic sheen of the moonlight to come through our window. Noticing my hesitation he lifted his head, he looked so sweet and innocent, looking at me with scared eyes. My lips found his in a soft reassuring kiss.

Seth looked more beautiful than ever laying down on our bed, scared, embarrassed, nervous and undeniably sexy. With each passing minute my body craved him more and more. I had to accept I had no fucking idea what I was doing, I was going on instinct. My chest puffed out in pride at the sight of the distinct bulge in his pants. I was doing that to him, he wanted me, AT LAST! He fucking wanted me and he was not going to limit us, tonight there were no walls and no barriers.

Attacking his neck to my total delight, I tasted his sweet chocolate flavored skin, kissing, licking, nipping on his silky perfection. My Seth… all mine.

I needed to do something; I didn't want to, I was risking rejection. But I couldn't let him go blind into a life changing experience. I respected him too much to hide important information. Sitting back on my legs I had to muster all my strength to talk to him. "Seth I need you to know that there is nothing in this world I want more than making you mine right now. But I need to give you two facts baby; I won't take you while you are in the dark about these two things. I'll be as gentle as I can but my wolf has been denied for too long and he might take over. I have better control and will do my best to submit him but he might win and baby… it will hurt." I shuddered at the idea of hurting Seth but it was a distinct possibility. He just nodded down sagely, was that submission I was detecting?

"The second is that for the first time we cannot use condoms and there is the risk I will get you pregnant." Seth expression changed immediately, I knew he was going to back down. Fuck! I messed up; I shouldn't have opened my stupid mouth. I was such an idiot.

_You have to be the biggest mother fucking idiot that ever existed! How could you tell him that? All you needed to do was ram yourself inside him, he wouldn't even know until after you were done and by then it would've been too late. What do you care is he gets pregnant, that's what he is here for, to give birth to the next alpha. _You're the idiot, I told you to stay away, this is my moment, three is a crowd, leave us alone!

"Why can't we use them Jake? I bought several packages they are in the drawer." His eyes were clouded with confusion, fear, apprehension, concern and a heaping cup of cold feet.

"Baby, I need our scents to mix for the claiming to be complete, it will only be for the first time, I promise." I was pleading with my eyes, I would've begged but I was too proud. For fuck sake's, why should an alpha beg his submissive for sex? My wolf was clawing my insides, punishing me for my stupidity. Sitting still I waited for his decision, regardless of what my wolf wanted, it was Seth's decision. He was the one who would carry and give birth to our child and that wasn't something to take lightly.

"Jakey, I love you more than my own life, I know we'll spend the rest of our lives together-"He doesn't want me now, I knew it! Stupid, stupid, stupid…

_So close, you were so fucking close, you had to go and open your mouth. Now see what you did to us? Listen to me; even if he says no, you're going to take him. You're twice his size, grow a fucking pair! Turn him on his stomach and ram your third leg up his ass. _Would you shut the fuck up! My wolf was relentless; he wasted no time to let me know what a pussy I was. The worst part was that a small part of me wanted to do exactly what he was instructing me to do.

He was not ready for any of this, he tried for my sake, my puppy wanted to please me. I needed to understand him; I loved him too much not to. I kept an inner monologue going trying to coax my wolf into going back to where he belonged and convince myself not to do anything that I would for sure regret.

"I know you don't want to be a parent right now-"Damn I hoped it wouldn't come to this, would I be able to just walk away after being so close?

"Will you let me finish? I know we'll spend the rest of our lives together, if we do it with a little one beside us, I'm fine with it." He was ok with it? He was willing to risk the possibility of pregnancy.

Unable to control the urge I attacked his lips and his neck, showing him that my moment of weakness was gone and I was in charge. Removing his shirt I reveled in his smooth chest and his taut abdomen. Allowing my tongue to run over his collarbone, I was in heaven; his skin was so smooth, mmmm mouthwatering. His nipples were next, from previous experiences I knew that his nipples were very sensitive and he went crazy any time I played with them. Seth arched his back to increase the contact with my mouth. My puppy was so fucking horny, I loved it!

It was time to liberate the prisoner Seth had in his pants that had been struggling to get out. He was following my movements with his eyes, stiffening when I lifted the tab and opened the zipper. I slid his pants past his narrow hips but stopped when doubt invaded me. Did I even know how to please him? I knew the basics, but I've never done any of this before. What if I hurt him? I didn't want him to suffer because of my inexperience.

Connecting with those gray orbs I was reassured everything was going to be ok. All I needed to do was prepare him and go very slow… go very slow… go very slow… I repeated those words as a chant for my benefit and to warn my wolf.

After his pants were gone I decided it was payback time and some teasing was in order. I ran my finger slowly over the tent on his boxers. My puppy started bucking into my hand; this was exactly what I've been waiting for. We had fooled around and had oral sex in multiple occasions but today was different, there was no fear and apprehension coming from Seth, he knew exactly what he wanted; now it was up to me to deliver. Seth was trembling with the contained lust in his body, threatening to erupt like a volcano.

"Aren't we an eager little puppy?" I nuzzled my head against his in a completely wolf-like gesture, he bared his neck to me and I chuckled satisfied at how submissive my little puppy was. His boxers were gone and in an instant he was totally bare for me. He looked delectable, like a feast spread out for a king. His scared whimpering in complete contrast to the condition of his cock, which was hard as a rock and begging to be played with.

"So beautiful, my Seth" He must be so tired of hearing me say the same line over and over, but it was true. My Seth was beautiful and unique.

I couldn't wait to have Seth stirring in pleasure. Letting my fingers explore, they hit the jackpot, when they found the two bluish lines that were my best weapon to give my mate a tremendous amount of pleasure. I remembered the day I found his sweet spot; it was on our first date, that day ended in disaster. I chose to remember the moans of pleasure that escaped Seth's mouth when I ran my fingers over his sweet spot. Repeating the same motions his moans were automatic, pants leaving his wet mouth one after the other.

His cock was standing proud, pointing to the sky, I couldn't resist. Leaning forward I swallowed it whole; grasping the base of his cock I pulled it out of my mouth to give the slit a lick, catching a few drops of his sweet nectar. Fuck! He tasted so good; tasting him was my addiction, one that I never wanted to break free from. My moans were sending vibrations directly to his cock, making my Seth quiver in pleasure. The temperature of his skin complemented the softness of it, the texture of the head and his unique taste making my mouth yearn for more. I rolled each of his balls in my mouth, mesmerized at the sight of his hairless crotch. He was lost into the sensations, pushing himself into my mouth seeking relief. His moans were loud and eager, the loudest I've ever heard them. But I had other plans; Seth wouldn't come until after I was deep inside him. I wanted him to be whimpering and begging to be fucked.

Making myself pull away from him I sat back, trying to figure out what to do next. Seth's whimpering was music to my ears; my sweet little puppy wanted more, he wanted my cock up his ass and he was going to get it.

"I love you so much Jake." His words were strained by the intoxicating need for sex.

"I love you too my angel." Grabbing his hips I rubbed our naked erections against each other. The sensation was hypnotic, skin against skin. Our cocks so hard they looked purple, the heads glistening with pre-cum. The friction was so marvelous. Bending forward I took his earlobe between my lips; I didn't want to bite him, at least not yet. He pulled my head towards him, it was like he couldn't get enough of me; he wanted me in the most primitive way.

Being careful not to put all my weight on him, I kept our bottom halves close, maintaining the contact between our erections. He explored my skin like a child discovering the wonders of the universe. My fingers explored every inch of his skin, waking up every nerve ending and learning where his most sensitive spots were located. We were learning about our bodies, observing, touching and smelling. Seth wrapped his hands on my biceps, his words taking me for surprise.

"Jake my Jake, make me yours, I need you." He wanted me to take him, to claim him as mine forever. I complied immediately stretching my arm to retrieve the lube from the drawer.

Lying down on my side I pulled him towards me so he was also on his side, facing me. I opened the tube of lubricant and squirted a generous amount on the fingers of my right hand, spreading it so it would warm up a little or a lot considering my temperature. His previous light trembles grew stronger, ripping through his body. His shaking was becoming more intense, to the point it was violent. This was becoming too real for him, Seth was scared. I didn't blame him, regardless of how slow I did it, it was going to hurt and nobody looks forward to experiencing pain, it's just human nature. A new scent assaulted my senses, the salty scent of his tears. Seth was trying to hide his tears, pressing his face against my chest, thinking I wouldn't notice. But what kind of mate would I be if I didn't notice he was crying? Lifting his handsome face all I could see in his eyes was fear. I met his nervous gaze with a loving and reassuring one.

"I know you're scared, my Seth, I am too. There is no rush; we have the rest of our lives baby. Just know that I will be very gentle and try to minimize your discomfort, I love you so much, please trust me." I meant every word I said, I was terrified, scared of not performing like he deserved, of failing to pleasure him or what would be worse, afraid of hurting him. I just held him, laying on our sides, rubbing lazy circles on his back. We stayed in our embrace until his shaking subsided.

"I trust you Jake, just go slow please." Reaching back I massaged the soft skin around his puckered hole trying to coax the muscles to relax. While whispering in his ear, "Seth you are my life, I've been dreaming of this moment for so long."

"Do you know that every day when I open my eyes, the first thought that comes to my mind is you?" He lifted his gaze, his answer visible in his teary eyes, he nodded affirmatively and buried his face on my chest inhaling deeply.

"Thanks you for accepting me, for accepting us."

"I swear you will not regret it; I would make up to you every single bad thing I've done. You will be the king of our castle with me as your faithful protector."

I was not going to rush anything; this was too wonderful and didn't want to spoil it by rushing and unintentionally hurting him. I pressed a lube covered finger against the throbbing entrance, pushing it in slowly. The moment I breached his tight sphincter he stiffened in my arms, but didn't seem to be in pain. Seth smiled sweetly letting me know he was fine.

Seth dug his dull nails onto my shoulder when I added a second finger, now it was hurting him. I wished there would be something I could do to, but there was no way around it. He would have to grit his teeth and take it like a man.

"Are you ok puppy? I'm sorry this is uncomfortable, but I need to prepare you." It would be worse if I took him without stretching him first, which would be cruel.

"It's ok Jakey; I'm just very nervous, that's all." Of course he was nervous, but as the alpha he was, his courage was carrying him through this. I moved my fingers in and out, pressing them in to the brim. Taking them almost out to only ram them back in. His breath started heaving, his chest rising and falling as I started a scissoring motion, slowly stretching him. He bucked against the fingers, feeling his light shivers of pleasure, knowing that I was capable of giving my mate pleasure filled me with pride and excitement. He was moaning a litany of obscenities mixed with my name.

"Oh Jake yes baby, yes!" With two fingers sliding easily in and out, I added a third finger. I saw him grimace in pain and began kissing his neck to distract him and give him some pleasure. I didn't want this moment to be just about the pain, I wanted him to enjoy it. After some time his eyes were twinkling every time the three fingers buried deep within him brushed the special spot inside him.

I could've kept giving him pleasure with my fingers all night, but my whole body was aching for him. My wolf demanding to have what belonged to him, threatening to take over. Yeah right, like I would let him. My cock was so hard it would've been impossible to stand up. Pulling my fingers out of him I squirted more lube onto my hand and rubbed over my turgid member, it was throbbing, the temperature probable a few degrees higher than usual. Seth was watching my every movement, gulping audibly when I started massaging my dick with the lubricant.

"Get on your back, love." Of one thing I was certain, that the first time I took Seth I wanted to see his face, to be able to look into his eyes. I knew that it would be easier with him on his side, but this was something that I wouldn't change. I needed our eyes to connect at the same time as our bodies became one. He needed to see me towering above him, possessing his body, dominating him.

My poor puppy was so scared, his eyes wondering around the room, like he was trying to plot a way to escape. I needed to put him at ease; it was killing me to know that I was going to hurt him, but it was inevitable. I caressed his quivering thighs, finding his sweet spot I massaged it softly, he responded by throwing his head back in pleasure. Don't worry baby, I'll make it feel good… toe curling good.

I felt a growl brewing in my chest at the sight before me, Seth completely exposed, his leg around my waist, his entrance glistening. His hands beside him, fisting the sheet below him, his face to the side exposing his vulnerable neck to me. I was sure he didn't even realize that his body language was reading, I'm ready and willing. The temperature in the room must've gone up a few degrees with our combined body heat. Seth's skin was burning and so was mine, the heat emanating from my sex and extending all over my body in concentric circles, like a rock thrown into a pond. We were two wolves in the prime of our lives; healthy, horny and in love.

Seth's heart was like the galloping of an out of control horse, fast and strong. I started what I knew was going to be the hardest part for him. Going as slow as my excitement allowed me; I began pushing slowly inside his twitching hole. At first the sphincter presented a lot of resistance, after all Seth was a virgin and his body was not used to any kind of attention to that particular part of his anatomy. Even with all the preparation, his tight hole wouldn't accept the big intruder. He tried to pull away from me, but I wouldn't take any of that, my strong grip keeping him in place. He was not going to get away; Seth Clearwater was going to submit once and for all. Pressing against the unyielding hole, I kept pushing at a slow and steady pace.

Fuck! Not even the head was in and it already felt good, just knowing that the same tightness was waiting for me inside him, almost made me squeal like a little girl. Suddenly and faster than I could register, the head disappeared inside his delicious ass. He cried out in pain flinging his head to the side, he was panting, struggling to catch his breath. He hissed, sucking air forcibly, and gritted his teeth until the pain seem to diminish.

My wolf was howling in victory and at the same time demanding that I bury myself inside him, without considering the consequences. It came to the surface to declare ownership on Seth's body, to have a first row seat to his subjugation and claiming. My wolf was instinct, pain and anger. The monster inside me was the thunder and lightning of the storm that had been brewing in my soul for months. We were so close we could taste it, we were one… NO! I couldn't let my wolf take over, Seth was mine, not ours, the wolf could have Seth's alpha female, but Seth's body was mine.

"Jake, your eyes…" For the second time this night, his eyes had been glistening with unshed tears, ready to spill at any moment.

"Baby don't be afraid; he is here claiming his mate, but it's not in control, I am." My wolf would be allowed to be present, but he would not dominate me. I was the alpha and Seth was my mate, we were the only ones that mattered.

Pushing inside him was a gradual process; going very slow, stopping after every inch to give him a chance to adjust. All I wanted was to push all my length into him, to feel myself sheathed in his silky folds, but that would've been cruel, I could even risk tearing him. The hot moisture seeping between his lashes was leaving his gorgeous face tear streaked, his grimaces a clear sign of all the pain I was causing him.

Unable to see him suffering I cleaned some tears from his face and knowing I was risking everything I told him what my conscience, my more human side was dictating. "Seth if it's too much we can stop, I can't stand to make you suffer baby." All I could think was please, please don't ask me to stop, I don't want to fucking stop, this feels too good.

"I know we can stop Jake, thank you for suggesting it. Even though it's hurting you need this and so do I, just make sure to make me feel good once the worst is over, ok?" Now I felt like shit, here I was being selfish and praying he wouldn't ask me to stop and he was thinking of me. I was lost in my thoughts when I felt his leg pushing on my back propelling me forward and burying the last four inches inside him. Now I was balls deep inside my imprint, suppressing the need to howl I concentrated on staying still. Seth was in pain right now, the last part of the penetration had been too abrupt and his whole body tensed with the pain.

Trying to take his mind away from his sore behind, I claimed his lips in a passionate fiery kiss. Our tongues battled, devouring each other, sliding easily inside his mouth. Seth's hands trailing up and down my back, stopping every once in a while to pull me towards him in a possessive way.

"I love you so much my Seth." He had given me his body completely and without hesitation. I knew the only reason he did it was because he was in love with me. His immense love for me was the driving force for this most perfect night. From this moment and for the rest of our lives he was mine and I was his.

"Mine." Those words carried with them a special significance. His heart and his body were all mine.

"Yours." One powerful little word hitting me in a life changing way. It carried in it commitment, devotion and unconditional love.

"All mine." Being in such intimate contact with my wolf was making me respond more like an animal and this statement came out sounding almost like a growl.

At last his eyebrows were not furrowed and he started bucking towards me, making me go deeper inside him. That's when the fun started, he didn't seem to be in pain; the sky was the limit. But first things first, his cock was sadly deflated having lost his early stamina during the initial penetration. Just a few tugs had it in full attention in no time. Still deep inside him I sat back stroking him with one hand while the other massaged his sweet spot. The whole time Seth bucked his hips towards me and fisted the sheets under him.

The noises coming out of him were uncensored, hot, his words dirty, better than any fantasy I ever had. I never expected my puppy act like this; I liked it, what the hell, I fucking loved it!

"Shit Jake right there baby, hit that same spot, please." His moans were unabashed and innocent at the same time. When I found that delectable bundle of nerves deep inside him he lunged forward licking and kissing my nipples, biting my chest gently. He may be a submissive, but that didn't make him any less aggressive in bed than a dominant wolf. I made a point to hit that spot every time. He met every thrust with the ferocity of a seasoned lover and not that of a young guy who was a virgin until a couple of hours ago. He urged me to go faster, demanded that I go deeper, he wanted more and he could take it. I obeyed every command, asking myself who was the dominant and who the submissive, at the end who cared! All I knew was that I was balls deep inside my imprint, feeling the warmth of his body around my cock.

"Seth you're mine."

"Fuck Jake, yes I am."

"You belong to me, only me."

"Only yours baby, forever."

"Say my name, say the name of your dominate."

"Jacob."

"Louder!" I demanded, this was not a game. Seth needed to completely submit to me.

"JACOB!" I thought this moment would never come, to have my imprint under me screaming my name while I fucked him. I fantasized so many times about this moment, trying to picture how he would look, how it would feel to have his amazing heat around my cock. He had both legs up on my shoulders, his lower back lifting off the bed every time I buried my heated member inside him. He clenched his ass muscles around me like he never wanted to let me go, claiming me as his personal slave, put on this earth to pleasure him, fuck I could live with that. I had to say this goes beyond any expectation I had, this was perfect.

"Damn it Seth, you feel so good, you're so fucking tight"

"Feels good on my side too babe." His words making the wall I built in the last six months to come crumbling into the ground. My biggest pleasure was to know he was enjoying me. I rammed into him with such force that if he wasn't a shifter he would've been hurt. I grabbed his butt roughly adjusting him for an even deeper penetration. I pulled out slowly until just the head is inside him, just to plunge myself inside him to a hilt.

"Ahhh fuck Jake, fuck me!" If Seth kept this up I was going to come before I was planning to. I pulled out of him, momentarily concerned with the hint of blood around his not so tight anymore entrance. Of course horny dethroned concerned in five seconds.

"Get on your hands and knees Seth, I need to mount you, to fuck you like the beasts we are." My wolf had been nudging me in the back of my consciousness, to take him the way he was meant to be taken. He wanted to mount him and in agreement with it for the first time ever, I instructed Seth on what he needed to do. My Seth was completely accepting me inside his body, offering me his behind and lowering his head in a totally submissive pose.

"So sexy… all mine… my Seth." I admired his naked ass, red from the previous impalement and from the traces of blood, evidence of his inexperience. Looking at him spreading his legs to accept me, made me go crazy with lust and in one swift motion I buried all my nine inches inside him. He yelped in pain, but I didn't stop, as a matter of fact my movements became more aggressive and feral. Taking my whole cock out before slamming it back inside.

With my hand on the small of his back I pushed him down on the bed, effectively pushing his legs apart even further. Seth was pushing back towards me, urging me to go deeper, adding fuel to the raging fire going on inside me. By his moaning and the way he arched his back, I knew he was enjoying this as much as me, maybe even more. I created a little monster, one that would not be satisfied unless I was balls deep inside him...something to look forward to…

"Jake, fuck me harder… deeper…" Yes baby, beg, I was more than happy to comply. This is what I wanted, total and unquestionable submission.

"Say my name Seth."

"Jacob."

"What am I?" I kept plunging my cock into his tight tunnel, fucking him wildly, without mercy.

"My mate and my lover." His words barely audible between all the moans and grunts each time I rammed my cock inside him. Seth was welcoming me inside him, offering me his perfect ass to do with as I pleased.

"That's not what I want to hear, what am I?" I screamed at him, this was not the time for games. From now on I was in control, no more getting out of line. I was establishing my dominance, repeating the same movements again and again. I was going to fuck my puppy until he couldn't walk or construct a complete sentence.

"My dominant." After I love you, those were my favorite words. It may seem idiotic to some, but to me it was very important. It was the total acceptance of who I was, I was a friend to some, an alpha to my pack, but to Seth's I was his dominant, the only one he would ever have. To hear him acknowledge my status was a synonym to the total acceptance of our bond.

His stunning cooper skin was glistening with sweat. I loved how the muscles on his back shifted under the skin, calling me to trail the contour of each one with my lips. I savored the bitter saltiness of his sweat, while I left a trail of kisses up his back to end on the back of his neck. Our difference in height, allowing me to do this while pounding into him with total abandon.

"Seth you are mine, forever mine, bear your neck to me in submission, now!" Seth complied immediately; I felt a shudder run the length of his body when I sucked on the place where I would mark him as mine. Unlike the one I placed on him months before, this one will never disappear, effectively warding off any wolf and especially any alpha, since he was so attractive to them.

"Mine, mine, mine, mine." I was in complete ecstasy, Seth was my drug, one that I craved and from which I never wanted relief. For the first time since imprinting, my wolf was content, purring inside me with the certainty of having his mate under him. My consciousness and the presence of my wolf closer than ever. We were separate entities, but inevitably at the same time we were one.

Wrapping my arm around him I slowly lifted Seth's upper body from our bed, pulling him up and towards me, so his back was flushed to my chest. The contact of our naked skin sending electric charges all over my body. Holding on to Seth's waist to stabilize him, I fucked him deep and hard, I was not pounding, thrusting or any other expression, I was fucking his brains out. I was fucking him the way I only dreamed about for months, I was screwing him the way I will keep doing for the rest of our lives.

My lips were working overtime on the skin of his neck, he already had a nice size hickey but that was not the reason I was sucking that spot. If I could do anything to ease his pain, short of not marking him at all, I would.

"I'm so close Jake."

"I know baby, you're gripping me so hard, you feel so good." By this point his hole must be burning, if it was it was not affecting him at all, he was holding on to me like his life depended on it. I just kept squeezing my burning cock inside his tight tunnel.

"Baby please touch me." Damn it! I was so involved in my own pleasure, Seth's cock stood forgotten in front of him, leaking pre-cum and so hard it looked purple. I tried to stroke him, my own inexperience making me fail at creating a good rhythm between my cock inside him and my hand around his erection. Hopefully with time I would get better at this and be able to have a good rhythm.

I was so fucking close and so was Seth. His muscles grabbing onto my erect flesh so hard they could've choked the life out of it. His legs felt jittery, lost in his sexual rapture. His orgasm was imminent I could feel the walls clenching and unclenching around my cock. His perfectly firm and rounded buttocks glistening with sweat and lube, glued to my crotch as I drilled him.

"Jake…" My name coming out of his mouth breathlessly. To my surprise he grabbed a fistful of hair and pulled me towards his neck, he was offering himself in still one more way. He wanted me to mark him; he was giving me permission to make our bond complete and unbreakable.

Baring my sharp canines I dug them into the tender flesh of my mate. I felt as skin, left place to muscle and the coopery taste of his blood in my mouth. Unlatching my teeth from his body, I moved back and lapped on the wounds, it only took a few seconds for it to begin healing. The two crescents on his shoulder would heal, but will never fade.

My Seth spilled his seed as creamy ribbons in front of him, landing on the bed. All the different sensations inciting my own orgasm and I came hard bathing Seth's insides with my warm seed. The volcano of lust that had been brewing inside my being for months erupting, its heat enveloping us in a scorching blanket of fire.

We were one and the same, two souls so tightly bound to each other that they could never be separated. From this moment on our scents would be the same, the double crescent mark on his shoulder marking him as mine forever. It dawned on me… Seth was **mine, all mine, **in body and soul. The defiant boy I imprinted on six months ago didn't exist anymore. He had been replaced by a wonderful man, the perfect lover and the owner of my heart. I knew our journey had been less than perfect, but this moment made it all worth it, this was the most perfect moment of my life.

On that bed there were two lovers accompanied by two entities, our wolves. They had accompanied us all through this journey, for better or for worse they were part of who we were and they played an important part in this perfect night. They filled our minds, their shared consciousness allowing us to glance into each other's thoughts. My Seth wanted my strength, my protection, my dominance and my love. I wanted his commitment, his respect and his love and after this moment he knew it also.

* * *

><p><strong>I hope you liked it! Please hit the bar that says review and share with me what you think of this chapter. <strong>


	35. Chapter 35 Freedom

**Disclaimer: I do not own Twilight, its plot or any recognizable characters, they belong to Stephenie Meyer.**

**To prevent any confusion the years will start with the morning after Jake claimed Seth and will add up as the years pass. The blessing Billy reads is a traditional Native American blessing it was not written by me.**

**In a few days I'll post a summary of the next story, it is a spin-off this one, I hope you'll like it. Stay tuned!**

**I want to thank all the wonderful readers that joined me in this journey and stayed with me. Your encouraging words gave me the energy to keep aiming to please each and every one of you.**

**I especially want to give recognition to the best Beta in the world, my wonderful husband. Single handedly you have shown me the meaning of unconditional love. Your support and encouragement has been key in the completion of this work. Boosting my confidence every time fear and self-doubt affected me and inspiring me with your kindness and strength. Thank you from the bottom of my heart, I love you.**

Chapter 35 Freedom

The next morning came way too early or at least I thought it was morning. My chest felt impossibly hot as I laid over something hard and warm. I was almost on top of Jake, my face resting on his rippled stomach, our legs intertwined.

I yawned in what I was sure was a very unattractive way and rubbed my eyes, not ready to wake up just yet. I felt like I ran a fucking marathon I wasn't sore, just plain tired. In a way I did run a marathon, the Jacob Black 10K. Lifting my gaze carefully in case he was still sleeping I was met by those gorgeous chocolate orbs.

I was taken aback by the change in his appearance. His whole face looked younger, his gaze softer than I've ever seen it. His permanently furrowed eyebrows laid in a relaxed arch over his eyes, not at an angle; his lips, soft, plump and kissable. Who would've known that making love would make Jake even more gorgeous? Oh…my…fucking… golly…. Jake and I made love last night. He claimed me… I was his.

"Good morning my angel." His voice also softer and if that was even possible, more loving.

"Good morning." I answered simply, feeling myself blush.

"Did I wake you up? I was trying not to move, so I wouldn't disturb you."

"You didn't wake me up, your stomach is grumbling so loud it sounds like you have a freaking bear in there." I said poking his stomach with my fingers, making him giggle. Jacob giggling? Who the heck was this and what did he do with my boyfriend?

"Sorry babe, but it's your fault, it was meager pickings last night."

"Well I guessed you didn't want to get too full from a heavy meal." I winked at him while resting my chin on his chest.

"You had everything planned didn't you?" He ran his fingers through my hair slowly, like he was doing it for the first time. Just like me, to him everything was new, our new intimacy was far greater than we ever expected. Last night we were able to take a glimpse into each other's mind, as brief as it was, it allowed us to see what we wanted and expected of each other.

"Pretty much." I said resting my head on his chest, the steady beat of my heart threatening to lull me back to sleep.

"Seth, are you ok?" He seemed unsure, like he would rather not know the answer to that question "I mean, are you sore?" He asked sheepishly with a concerned look in his face.

"Not really, tired and hungry but not sore."

"You know I mean…back there…"

"Yes I know Jake; I'm fine really, stop asking." I said burrowing my face on his chest, so many insecurities coming to the surface. I was not only embarrassed, but afraid that now that we've taken this step, things would change. I doubted it, but I was not used to things going my way and this relationship had proven that more than once.

"Why are you so embarrassed my Seth? Last night was the best night of my life. Making love to you was the single most exhilarating experience I ever had. It was the authentic proof of your unconditional love." He asked genuinely concerned, love flowing freely from each one of his words. I could not even look at him, knowing that he would see the fear in my eyes and worry I was regretting my decision and that was definitely not the case.

"Mine too Jake, it's that so much has happened. I love you so much and I'm afraid." I had to tell him, it was not my intention to begin this stage of our relationship by hiding my feelings from him. I was done hiding, no more hiding my intelligence, no more hiding my sexuality and no more hiding my feelings.

"What are you afraid of, my love, are you regretting our mating?" Cue the insecurities, I was so happy I couldn't imprint, this was though shit.

"No Jake I don't regret giving myself to you, it's that…."

Not known for his patience, Jake tensed up and urged me to tell him. "Seth, for goodness sake spit it out!"

"Now that you made love to me and marked me as yours, are you going to change? Are you going to still be loving and treat me well?" Afraid of his answer I felt my eyes well up. Mimicking my actions of last night I buried my face on his chest trying to hide my tears. Jake lifted my chin and after cleaning the tears that were running down my cheeks with his thumb kissed me softly on the lips.

"My Seth I loved you for a while now, but last night was like that love grew to immeasurable levels. Please never doubt the magnitude of my love for you. You are the single most important person in my life and I'll never change; if anything, I'll love you more. I'll always take care of you and love you like you deserve to be loved, like the owner of my heart."

"Thanks you Jake, I trust you. What about you? Is your wolf behaving?" I knew how cruel Jake's wolf had been and how hard it had been to resist doing what his wolf demanded. That made me admire him even more, his love for me was far greater than even his own nature.

"Yep, he is so happy he is purring." Jake sighed at peace for the first time in months. I just took my position with my head on his chest; Jake traced circles on my smooth back with one of his hands just like he had done last night. We had been in our embrace for some time when I heard a soft humming reverberating on his chest. It was a soft melody, one that I never heard before. Not wanting him to stop I stayed still listening to him.

A minute after he stopped, I lifted my gaze and saw him cleaning a tear from his left eye. "That was beautiful Jake, I've never heard that melody before, what is it?"

"It's a song my mom used to sing to me, I don't remember most of the lyrics but I'll never forget the melody. Whenever there was a storm and I would get scared she would sing it to me. It's amazing; I've not allowed myself to even remember that song since she died, but today it came naturally. I guess I'm happy again Seth, your love made me happy again." Jake wrapped his strong arms around me and held me tightly to his bare chest. We knew that during the strongest storm, in the middle of the darkest night, through the deserts of our life, we would have our love to sustain us.

His embrace felt like home, I had been given a gift; I was made complete by him. This was right; I was exactly where I needed to be in this point of time. The anger and sense of abandonment I felt after the death of my parents had been replaced with peace. The hate and resentment I felt against my heritage, my family and Jake, had been replaced with unconditional love. I rubbed my face against the wall of muscle that was his chest and his scent wrapped me in a blanket of protection, allowing a sigh of content to escape from my throat I relaxed even further onto his chest. I knew what awaited me in the future, a lifetime of peace in his arms.

"I've loved you for a while now, what makes today so different?" I was being a smart aleck for asking that but couldn't help it; it was just too good to pass.

"Well today is not that different, a day like every other, I guess I'm in a better mood today." He said shrugging his shoulders, I glared at him, he had to go there and be a jerk, I asked for it but he could've been more gracious about it.

"I can tell you what is different about today, you fucked me last night." Shit why was I so touchy this morning? In my mind I knew he was joking, why did I allow an innocent comment get to me?

"Seth two things, are you listening?" I nodded affirmatively, he looked pissed. "First, I did not fuck you last night, I made love to you and second I forbid you from ever talking about our mating in such a way."

"Sure, sure." He smirked at my use of his already famous expression.

"Seth, I need to make a phone call, stay in bed, I'll be right back ok."

"No problem, actually I want to take a shower, I'm all sticky. I'll be in the bathroom" I was covered in sweat, lube and cum, damn I was a fucking petri dish.

"No Seth, you'll wait for me here, I'll take you to the bathroom" Dominant much, Mr. Bossy Hot Bod? Even though I was amused with Jake's extreme behavior, my more freedom loving side was appalled by his controlling attitude.

"Jake what's your problem?" I snapped at him.

"Seth you'll need to bear with me for a little while. If I was protective of you before, multiply that by one thousand and that will give you an idea of how much I need to take care of you and protect you now." Oh great now we were back to square one, was he going to hold me prisoner again?

"So that means I won't be allowed to even walk anymore?" I was not planning to take any of this crap, I fought him before and I was not afraid of doing it again.

"No Seth, this doesn't last long. In Sam it didn't happen because of their special circumstances, but in Jared it lasted almost one week. Then things will go back to normal. Ok puppy? Anyway I doubt you can walk well right now. Last night was pretty intense and you were so demanding." He gave me that awful smirk that I loved to hate. The memory of my actions and my words last night came back to me and made me self-conscious, since I acted like a whore and talked like a sailor.

"Sorry." Was the only response I could verbalize.

"What the hell are you apologizing for? I can't wait for us to do it again." Said Jake, wiggling his eyebrows while smiling.

"Now who is the horny puppy?"

"I'm no puppy; I'm the big bad wolf." I laughed out loud; I thought of him so many times as the big bad wolf but didn't remember telling him, maybe I talked in my sleep.

"Well Mr. Big, can you carry me to the bathroom so we can shower."

"Fuck Seth, shower with you? I don't think I will be able to contain myself"

"And who is talking about containing anything." I winked an eye and suddenly I was in the air being carried by strong arms. Jake stopped for a second to retrieve a condom from the drawer and grab the lube before taking off towards the bathroom.

That was the most tantalizing and pleasurable shower of my entire life, in which Jake pinned me against the wall while burying himself inside me again and again. It was still a little painful to take him initially, but it had definitely been easier. Jake carried me to our bedroom where he proceeded to get some clothes from the dresser. When he turned around holding a pair of sweatpants and a gray wife beater, I saw his face contort in pain.

"Jake what's wrong?!" I all but screamed at him.

"Seth the bed…" he whispered so low if it wasn't for my wolf hearing, I wouldn't have been able to hear it.

Turning around I saw the reason for his sudden change. There were blood stains on the bed sheets. Several smears from where I guessed my butt rubbed the sheet while Jake was pounding me. I stood up, but before I could take one step, I was being placed ever so gently on his lap.

"I'm so sorry Seth" I covered his mouth with my hand. This was nonsense it was obvious I was going to bleed a little; for goodness sake, it was my first time. He didn't need to act like he almost killed me.

"Jake you're being dramatic, it was my first time and you are not exactly small down there, you know. There is nothing you could've done differently to change the outcome." All things considered he had been very gentle with me last night. Holding me when I was so nervous I felt I would pass out and going very slow and giving me time to adjust to his size. I haven't had any lovers before, but I was sure he was the perfect lover.

"Thank you for understanding baby, I tried my best." I knew he tried; it must've been a monumental effort to control his urges. Placing me on the bed he dressed me without wasting any opportunity to kiss any part of my body. My body was becoming his very own personal playground.

The next few days went by in a blur, our lovemaking sessions, which were five or six a day, keeping me at a constantly aroused state. The saying proved itself true, the more you do it, the more you want it. And I wanted it! All the time, everywhere, with the exception of Billy's room, there was no surface in the house we didn't try.

Jake cooked all my meals never letting me help to even do the dishes, I was getting freaking spoiled. Since the day Jake claimed me my feet didn't touch the floor, which to be totally honest was getting old fast. I couldn't even walk to the bathroom, drawing the line with letting him watch me do my business; some things were meant to remain private.

Wednesday afternoon I was awoken from a nap by the sound of voices coming up from the living room. Chasing the nap bunnies away I blinked a few times trying to focus. I identified the voices as Sam and Emily, hoping everything was ok and this was just a social visit. After dressing hastily with some clothes I found at the foot of the bed, I jumped out of bed, but just after the second step I knew Jake was right, I couldn't walk very well. My hips were sore and felt tight; this was a completely new feeling. I had no idea what I was going to do when I returned to school. Walking slowly I reached the top of the stairs, immediately three pairs of eyes landed on my shaking form.

"Seth, stay upstairs." Yeah right, like I was going to listen to him. Jake was getting used to me being a good submissive, but he should know better, that was not going to last long. Ignoring my pain I began climbing down the staircase. Before I could register Jake was standing in front of me with an extremely annoyed look on his face.

"Seth, when I tell you something I expect you to comply, you need to learn your place my little submissive." He said this in a gentle but very assertive way, his hot breath hitting my face and making me yearn for his touch and for his lips. Fuck! Seth Clearwater, get a grip! I took a deep breath to clear my thoughts, trying to shake off any sex related thoughts.

"I thought my place was by your side as your mate, not obeying like a dog." Cheap shot I knew it, since I could never defeat Jacob in a battle of wills, I had to do use my cleverness.

"Seth I don't expect you to obey, just to respect me as your dominant. I will never disrespect you in such a way. Anyway my request has nothing to do with that, I'm just not ready." Now I was confused.

"Ready for what Jake?"

"To share you with other people."

"Jake sooner or later I have to leave this house." He couldn't argue with that, he didn't like it, but unless he was planning to hold me captive, I would have to eventually leave the house. Jake stood still deep in thought for a minute before speaking.

"Ok you can come downstairs, but I'll carry you." I would not tell him, but he had no idea how happy I was to be carried downstairs.

"Hi guys!" I cheerfully greeted a smirking Emily and a suddenly serious Sam.

"Hello sweetie, how are you?" Said Emily while giving me an impish look.

"I'm great, missing everybody."

"Seth you're so full of it, you are not missing anybody. I'm surprised you even remember our names." Said Sam in a pitiful attempt to be funny, he was never one to hide his feelings very well. That's why whenever he was angry or upset and didn't want people to notice, he would just turn to stone.

"Sam what's wrong? You don't seem quite yourself. Is everybody ok?" I had an idea of why he was acting so strange, but decided to let him tell me, instead of making a fool of myself if I was wrong.

"Everybody is fine." Answered Sam curtly.

"Then what's wrong, are you mad at me?" I don't remember doing anything that would grant me Sam's anger, but in view of my total ignorance, I felt I needed to inquire about this possibility. As a reaction to my distress Jake's arm tightened around me, while taking a step back, probably resolute in getting me away from the reason for my discomfort.

Sighing deeply Sam offered his explanation. "Seth you're my little brother and seeing Jake carry you downstairs makes it painfully obvious you cannot walk right now and I can't help but be upset about it. It's a big brother thing."

"Sam, I didn't hurt him." Interjected Jake probably feeling he needed to defend himself. I placed my hand on his cheek to help him calm down; nobody wanted tempers to flare up.

"Baby, he knows" I turned to look at Sam while resting my head on Jake's shoulder. By allowing my body language to speak for me, I showed him I was happy and at ease in his arms. Sam nodded in understanding, giving me a small smile. "Anyway why are guys here? Are you checking on us?"

"Kind of, we thought that since neither one of you has left the house in five days, you're probably running low on food." Emily was right, I stocked the pantry but with the way Jake eats there was not much left, especially considering that our new activities were making him hungrier. Jake placed me on the sofa next to Emily and ran outside with Sam to get the groceries from their car. He literally ran, didn't walk, didn't jog, he ran, leaving my side for the first time in five days. My wolf was hilarious when he was acting like a scared puppy.

"So Seth, before Jake comes back, tell me, are you happy?"

"Yes Emily, this past week has been just unreal. Jake has been the devoted lover and boyfriend everybody told me he would be. You were all right and I just needed to get my head out of my ass long enough to see it too. Emily if I may ask, where did Sam mark you?" Since Jake marked me, I had been wondering about it, it was none of my business, but it was part of my nature to be curious about certain things. While I was talking, Jake and Sam walked in with an armful of bags each and went directly to the kitchen to put everything away.

"He didn't Seth, our circumstances were very different and at the time he didn't know about the marking. Since that's something that has to happen the first time, he lost his chance. Anyway he always said he didn't deserve to do it, sometimes he still feels that way. Jake marked you?" Emily was whispering, she should know better, they could hear her whispering even from outside.

"Yes, right here" Pulling my t-shirt to the side, I revealed the double crescent mark on my shoulder. As I was doing this, Jake and Sam walked into the living room. Sam stood frozen in his path; his eyes went wide at the sight in front of him, a slight twinge of anger and longing in his eyes.

"Damn Seth you look like a leech bit you." His tone was an odd combination of anger and acceptance.

"No leech Sam, just the big bad wolf." Jake smiled softly and approached me, kneeling in front of me. We got lost into each other's eyes, after running my fingers through his hair, I kissed him softly on the lips. I didn't notice Sam and Emily leaving, just felt my body falling slowly towards the sofa and Jake's form hovering over me as he took my clothes off.

Two years later

"Seth Clearwater." The principal announced my name over the microphone in the commencement ceremony. I walked up the few steps to the stage where the principal and some of the elders awaited to hand me my high school diploma. The small room filled with the wild wave of applause and the roar of cheers from my family and friends. My whole cheering section made up about half the people in the small auditorium. Towering among them, I could clearly see my Jake, the look of pride on his face spoke of what resided in his heart.

I did not only graduate from high school, but I did it with honors. Not having to hide my intelligence anymore allowed me to get the grades I was meant to have and in the process ensure me a nice scholarship that in combination with a scholarship given to me by the council, were going to cover my tuition and most of our living expenses.

After the ceremony I walked through the crowd trying to reach my family, it was not an easy feat as the small group of graduates all donning their black cap and gowns were intent in doing the same. At least for me it would be easier since I could always find the beacon of light that was my mate, not only that, but he was the tallest person there.

Impatient as ever he pushed his way through the crowd to get to me, I was surprised he was not flinging people right and left, seeing so many were touching me, something he still detested and always would. He picked me up by the waist bringing me up to meet his lips. I heard a few gasps around us, probably from the few people visiting from out of town, because everybody in the reservation knew about us and especially knew to reserve any comments they had for when they were a safe distance from us.

That afternoon we had a barbeque in Sam's house that was attended by most of the pack. Jared was the only one not present since he was having lunch with Kim and her grandparents who came all the way from New York for her graduation. For Jake and I the party was bittersweet, in a week we would be leaving the reservation for our new apartment and our new life. We rented a tiny apartment between Seattle and Forks, that way Jake could keep working in the garage he had been working on for over two years and I could attend the University of Seattle.

Like he hadn't already sacrificed enough, Jake relinquished his position as alpha to Sam while we lived outside the reservation. It was the practical decision, Jake would still cover all his patrols but Sam would try to work up a schedule in which he could do it less often but for longer periods of times. Sam accepted the position of alpha with the condition that as soon as I graduated, we would return to La Push and Jake would resume his position so Sam could stop phasing and grow old with Emily. The idea of Sam growing old and leaving me filled me with anguish, but knowing how much he loved Emily, I understood that for him there was no other option, he wouldn't want it any other way.

Eight years later

"Ok everybody, settle down I want to propose a toast." Several hushes were heard among our group as people stopped their various conversations and listened to Sam.

"I cannot express how proud I am of my brother, the first Clearwater to graduate from college, not only with a bachelor's degree but also with a master's in business administration. I never doubted he could do it and I am most definitely not surprised, after all, he got his brains from me." Again Sam, comedy was not your gift.

"That's why you don't have any left!" Exclaimed Jared, next to a very pregnant Kim while holding their two year old son, Matthew, on his lap. Not even fatherhood had put a damper on Jared's sense of humor and to be totally honest Sam walked into that one all by himself. Sam just glared in his direction before continuing.

"As I was saying before I was so rudely interrupted, I am so proud of my brother, with a lot of effort and making many sacrifices he obtained his degree. Both Seth and Embry are making us look good." Embry absence was felt by all of us, but we knew he was working really hard to improve himself. We all supported his decision to temporarily leave the pack and go to med school. He was already in his second year and even though he was not getting much sleep, he loved every minute of it. He said he wanted to come back and work in Forks and in the reservation. With so many wolves needing patching up every once in a while, he will have his hands full.

Three years before, there had been a steady stream of leeches nosing around our lands, this triggered the change in four more wolves which brought our numbers to fourteen, one of the biggest packs in the United States. They were all dominates; I secretly wished at least one of them would be a submissive, but when I inquired about it, Billy explained to me that each pack can only have one submissive, if any. There is only one female alpha in each pack and I was it.

"Seth, I raise my glass in your honor, making known that we all feel the same way. You have many God given gifts and one of those is your intelligence. Use the knowledge you acquired in these five years to build a strong foundation for your family, to help develop our reservation even further and to honor our parents and our traditions." I breathed deeply a few times to prevent me from crying when Sam mentioned our parents. Noticing my sudden distress Jake squeezed softly the hand he was holding in his own.

"Everybody, please join me to honor my brother, Seth; cheers!" All around us my family and friends clinked their bottles of beer and cups of soda. After this Jake stood up in what was positively going to be a toast.

"Well I guess now is my turn. I witnessed all of Seth's hard work, the long sleepless nights and the endless hours in front of the computer. He was focused, knowing exactly what he needed to do to succeed. Seth never lost his smile or his enthusiasm, even when he was so tired he could barely keep his eyes open. Especially he never made me feel like a distraction or like I took second place in his life. Sometimes he doesn't realize just how wonderful and perfect he is, but he has me to remind him every day. This achievement goes to prove once more how much strength Seth has inside him. He is smart, funny, beautiful and the most loving person ever created." Everybody turned quiet, even the children, all we could hear was the sound made by the wind cradling the leaves of the trees around us. Jake took a few nervous steps in my direction and I felt the breath get caught up on my throat when I saw him get on one knee in front of me.

"My beautiful Seth, I love you more than you'll ever know, when I'm awake you're always in my thoughts and when I sleep you visit me in my dreams. My angel, you have been my life for eight wonderful years and I can only pray that we would have many more years together. Since you accepted me, my life changed for the best, you made my life worth living. My love for you grows stronger with every beat of my heart. I'll always love you, cherish you and protect and honor our bond. Seth Clearwater, will you be my husband?" I saw that moment as an opening wide shot in a movie, the camera moving slowly towards us, only to leave Jake and me in the frame. I was genuinely floored, we had talked about it more than once, but never in my wildest dreams had I thought he would propose today. Then reality hit me hard, the second I saw him get in one knee I just knew what he was going to do. My eyes welling up with emotion and my heart racing as I heard him declare his love in front of all our family and friends. I cried out loud so everybody could hear me, "Yes!" and jumped towards him almost knocking him down on the floor. After kissing him repeatedly and whispering many _I love you, _I took a step back to look at the man who a minute ago asked me to marry him. He held my hands shaking slightly, we felt like two kids who just shared their first kiss, excited, nervous, anxious and desperately in love. Jake took out of his pocket a bracelet that he placed on my left wrist; it consisted of a very intricate zigzag design in blue, rust and sand, fastened using a pair of braided cords with a small carving of a russet wolf on it. It was elastic which would be very convenient when I phased. It was impossible for either one of us to wear rings, so Jake's personal take on the old Quileute tradition of giving a promise bracelet to your betrothed made perfect sense.

Nine years later 

The past year had been filled with work, beginning our life as a family and planning our wedding. The wedding planning facet was the easiest one since we were going to have an intimate gathering with only our family and closest friends. The place for the ceremony was easy to decide since both Jake and I had the same idea, one of the clearings Jake had created during one of his rage attacks. Through the years we visited that specific one many times and discovered a gem in our back yard. It was located next to a small creek and a lot of flowers grew all over fueled by the abundant amount of rain and virgin terrain. The reception would take place in the reservation community center, where we planned to have a catered dinner, dancing and cake. It would be simple and fun, nothing stiff or fancy, just a group of friends celebrating life, friendship and family, perfect for us.

The only gray cloud in our wedding plans had been Jake's sister Rachel who adamantly refused to come to the wedding. She felt that Jake was just confused and his poor choice of mate was due to their father lack of discipline. To say that Billy had been pissed was the understatement of the year. He yelled at her for good fifteen minutes, recriminating her for escaping from their lives fifteen years ago and abandoning him and Jake when they needed her the most. Something that I was not aware of, was the fact she lived less than four hours away, but never came to visit, giving the excuse that it was too hard without her mom here. Billy called her a hypocrite and told her that if she did this to her brother, she might just pretend they all died in the accident that took away her mom. It was very harsh and painful for Billy to say this, Jake and I just comforted him as he wept after hanging up the phone.

With the help of the construction company that Sam worked for, we built a small house in the Black's property, we wanted to stay very close to Billy, but at the same time have our privacy. Billy insisted that this was not the Black property anymore, but the Black-Clearwater property. He said that even before we decided to hyphenate our last names after getting married. The house was small but it's very high ceilings made it look bigger. We were thrilled with the fact that we were able to customize everything to Jake's size and at the same time make it accessible for me. It also had plenty of land around it that would provide for expanding it as the family grew. It had two bedrooms, an eat-in kitchen, living and dining room combination and one bathroom. It was perfect for us and it was move-in ready a month before the wedding. We decided not to live in it until after the wedding; wanting to move into our brand new house as a married couple. Billy was more than happy to have us under his roof a little bit longer, he had gotten used long ago to our wild, loud and crazy nights and a good pair of ear plugs always helped.

As our wedding approached we were expecting to experience a lot of fighting, anxiety and nerves but neither one of us felt that way. The only time I had a fit was after one too many jokes about me wearing a white dress at the wedding. Jake and I decided we were going to wear dark blue suits with sand colored shirts. It was our own personal take on the beach, the dark blue ocean against the sparkly multi-hued sand. The only difference would be our ties; mine would be sand and his russet brown, honoring our wolves, which were such an important part of us. We were both busy, taking care of all the last minute preparations, but we didn't argue or get cold feet. We were sure of our decision, we made a point to leave all bad experiences in the past and look forward to a happy future filled with hope and love.

Jacob's sister Rebecca and her husband arrived a week before the wedding. After Rachel's rejection, I was very nervous for her reaction, but was pleasantly surprised by her total acceptance. Even though her never ending shrieking every time Jake and I would steal a kiss or hold hands was getting very old, it was fun to have her around. Billy was beaming; having two of his children with him made him extremely happy.

Our combined bachelor party was very tame especially considering we were part animal. We got together in Quils house to play cards and have a few beers. The pack had decided to make their goal for the night to get us drunk. In my case it was easy, after several beers and a few shots of tequila I was singing Poker Face by Lady GaGa. With Jake it was impossible, they gave him almost a whole case of beer and so many shots they lost count and he barely got a little tipsy. The next day I felt I was going to die, and swore off alcohol for the rest of my life. Thankfully the bachelor party happened a week before the wedding, if it had been the night before I don't know what I would've done. Jake gave the guys a good run for their money for making his baby sick; he chased them all the way to Canada, with the promise to pound them as soon as they showed their sorry faces in La Push, and he did.

It was very emotional for all of us when I shared my theory about Jake's scent changing to moss and wildflowers. I felt it had been a gift from the spirits of my parents. This way even from the spirit world they guided me toward my happiness. Leah and Sam walked towards me and we mixed in a warm embrace while salty tears rolled down our faces. There was not one dry eye in the cramped living room of Sam's house where we had gathered to ask permission to marry. Even though our union would be as untraditional as they come, we still wanted to keep some aspects of our heritage. Our traditions were fundamental parts of who we were. One of these was to ask permission to marry from the families. Traditionally the groom would ask the bride's family and seal the engagement with gifts. Since I refused to be considered the bride, Jake asked Sam for his blessing and I asked Billy for his blessing.

I cried openly when during the rehearsal dinner Billy referred to me as his son. My father and I were very close and I missed him more than ever. These past years Billy filled part of the hole I had in my heart because of the absence of my parents. Billy explained how after a difficult beginning I made him swallow each one of his glares and mean-spirited words. He said that my love for his son showed him the error of his ways and that nothing can be accomplished by being closed minded and prejudiced. Love is love and it recognizes no nationality, social status or gender.

Jake and I spent the night before our wedding away from each other. It was the first time in nine years we didn't sleep together at least part of the night. There had been occasions when the patrols kept Jake away for hours or I stayed up late studying. But even if it was just a couple of hours, we always found ourselves cuddling in each other arms in our bed. I slept in my old room in Sam's house, courtesy of my nephew Timothy who gracefully allowed me to share his room. Leah and her husband also decided to spend the night and what was supposed to be a relaxing and restful night was turned into a slumber party. We stayed up late sharing stories of our childhood while eating cookies and drinking cocoa. I laughed until my face hurt and tears filled my eyes. By two in the morning Sam called it a night and ordered everybody to go to bed so he and Emily could rest for a few hours. Leah and I felt like two little kids again and we wouldn't change it for the world.

After a few hours of sleep I welcomed the morning of the most important day of my life, the day I would become Seth Black-Clearwater. I could've slept more, since the wedding was at four o'clock but as soon as I opened my eyes the realization of what was going to happen today chased the sleep away from my eyes. I walked to the window to see what kind of day awaited us and bask in the rays of sunlight that were coming through the window in what was promising to be a beautiful day. Even nature conspired to make this day glorious. The sky was a beautiful shade of blue instead of our usual gray overcast. The small drops of dew were still present in the vegetation, reflecting the bright sun, shining on them, the light bouncing off in every direction like diamonds. I was humbled by all the beauty that surrounded us in our small reservation.

So many memories filled my mind in a constant flow of images, words and feelings. The first time I phased and Jake imprinted on me. Meeting Jay and learning about dominants and submissives. Our first date and the separation that followed that fateful day. My sixteenth birthday, I was already twenty five years old, but I was sure that even if I lived a thousand years I would never forget that day. My imprisonment in Jake's house and the progression of my feelings from hate and fear to admiration and love. The werewolf attack that almost took Jake away from me forever. Closing my eyes I allowed the hot moisture to escape through my lashes as so many emotions assaulted me. I decided to call Jake; I needed to hear his voice, to make sure this had not been a dream. He answered the phone on the second ring.

"Good morning, future Mr. Black-Clearwater!" Answered Jake cheerfully, I breathed a sigh of relief when his voice reached me.

"Good morning Mr. Hot Body Black-Clearwater!" My witty remark got a good giggle out of him. "Did you sleep well baby?"

"Kind of, it was hard to go to sleep without you by me, I've gotten used to having your delicious warm body next to me and my bed felt so empty and cold I almost ran to Sam's house to climb through your window and sleep with you. What about you, you slept well?"

"The few hours I got were good. But we kind of turned last night into a slumber party and stayed up until two o'clock. Baby, I laughed so hard I cried. Listening to Leah and Sam telling stories of when I was a baby was so much fun; I wished you could've been here. Did you know that Leah tried to sell me? She went to Mrs. Williams and told her she could have me for five dollars. Mom and dad gave her a good spanking, but decided to give her more attention because she was obviously jealous of the new baby." Jake laughed heartily at my new anecdote.

"Seth, any second thoughts? Cold feet?" Asked Jake with a hint of worry in his voice.

"None whatsoever. I'm ready to get hitched, are you having second thoughts?"

"Nope, I can't wait; I hope the hours pass really fast."

"Good, I'm going to let you go babe. I'm going to check if Emily needs help with the kids or something." Emily had her hands full with her three children. The older was Timothy who was seven years old, Melanie who was four and baby Alexander who was nine months old. Sam was going to be setting up the tent we rented for the occasion since the weather was so unpredictable. The rest of the pack divided themselves between patrolling and setting up the chairs for the ceremony and the community center.

The hours passed quickly accompanied by a steady stream of visitors and one phone call after the other. By three o'clock I was basically bouncing of the walls, excitement and nerves getting the best of me. At three thirty I walked downstairs looking sharp and ready to get married. Leah approached me and pinned a simple boutonniere that consisted of three wildflowers. It was my special request that I only wanted wildflowers in the wedding, they always reminded me of my mother and I needed to feel her close today. Both Leah and Emily were fighting back tears trying not to ruin their makeup. Sam hugged me tightly and left to meet Jake in his house. Through the years Sam and Jake became very good friends, they had so many things in common and that made the friendship easy. Jake had asked Sam to be his best man at our wedding, position he proudly accepted. I asked Quil to be my best man, he was my obvious choice as through the years and even with the distance, we still confided in each other and became best friends.

We all arrived to the ceremony site with time to spare, I couldn't wait to see Jake; I was shaking, my whole body responding to the occasion. Everything looked beautiful, there were baskets with bunches of wildflowers tied with ribbons on the entrance and in the front. In the front were the ceremony itself was going to take place they placed a traditional woven rug, surrounded by more flowers. There were several rows of chairs and at the end of each row I could see a stand with a candle, it rested on a base that was staked to the ground.

At last, the sole tune of a flute filled the tent with its sweet melody. I entered from the left with Leah on my right side and Sam on my left. Jake entered from the right with Rebecca on his right side and Billy on his left. As soon as Jake was within my sight our eyes met, his smile even brighter, his eyes glistening with the tears that were threatening to escape. We approached each other slowly, in that instant we were alone in the world there was nobody else and nothing else mattered. I was standing in front of the man I had chosen as my husband. We were going to make a commitment in front of our family and friends that was irrevocable and unbreakable.

Billy's voice brought us back to the moment as Jake and I had briefly escaped this reality to meet in a land filled with hopes and dreams. Jake looked at his father wide eyed, incredulity and surprise written on his face. I had told Jake that one of the elders was going to marry us, but always found a way to evade telling him it was going to be Billy. Jake bent forward and hugged his father while thanking him.

"Today we have gathered in this place of natural beauty to celebrate life and love, to celebrate the love of Jacob and Seth. We have the sky as our most sacred cathedral; we have the earth at our feet to hold us and the trees and plants to embrace us. By their commitment to marry each other they are saying yes to love, yes to caring, yes to family. Neither I, nor all society can join these two lovers today. Only they can do what they have chosen. We, by our participation on this celebration, recognize and honor their intention to live as a married couple." Billy struggled to get the words out, emotion tinting every syllable.

"Have you come here in the midst of these natural surroundings to affirm your commitment to each other, freely, voluntarily and without any conditions?" Asked Billy, his question directed at both of us.

"Yes we came voluntarily." We answered at the same time.

"Please face each other and share the vows you have written."

I was the first one to speak "I am so proud to marry you today. You're a precious gift, my personal sun, my hope and my joy. I look at you and see my best friend, by your side I no longer fear being myself. You are my soulmate, without you I would be incomplete. Every time you touch me or look at me, I hope is the touch, the look that will say you're mine; you, the one that claims me. I give myself to you completely as I have given you my hand to hold, so I give you my life to keep. My love for you will be like the constant and unchanging tide, never ending, flowing freely from my soul. Your love came softly upon my heart, just like there will never be a morning without the ocean flow, so there will never be a day without my love for you."

"I Seth Clearwater, take you Jacob Black to be my husband, my partner in life and my one true love."

I thought that by this point I would be bawling but that was not the case, I was overjoyed. This was the single most perfect moment of my life. Looking into the eyes of the man I loved while promising my eternal commitment and love.

Jake then said, "How blessed I am to be able to say that you are mine, to be able to love and cherish you for the rest of my days. I want to hold your hands until mine go numb, stare into your eyes till I go blind, kiss you until my mouth goes dry, protect you until I can't anymore and love you all days until the sun doesn't rise anymore. I belong to you; I offer my life for you. I give to you my protection, my heart, my soul and my body. You are the only one who can look into my eyes and see my soul. You have given me the wonderful gift of peace and happiness and in honor of that gift I pledge before our family and friends to love and cherish you forever."

"I Jacob Black, take you Seth Clearwater to be my husband, my partner in life and my one true love."

"For thousands of years lovers have exchanged rings as a token of their vows. These simple bands are not of great value in themselves, but are made precious by our wearing them. Your rings say that even in your uniqueness you have chosen to be bound together."

"What have you given each other as a symbol of this pledge?" Continued Billy.

"We have given each other our hearts and marked our skin with the symbol of our eternal commitment." Jake and I said in unison. Jake took my hand and kissed my ring finger that now was adorned with the tattoo of a wedding band. We couldn't wear rings, but felt the need to have a visible proof of our commitment. I came up with the idea of tattooing the rings and Jake loved it. Taking Jake's finger I mimicked his actions placing a gentle kiss over his tattoo.

"I will like to read a Native American blessing to the couple".

"_Above you are the stars, below you are the stones"._

"_As time does pass, remember;"_

"_Like a star should your love be constant."_

"_Like a stone should your love be firm."_

"_Be close, yet not too close."_

"_Possess one another, yet be understanding."_

"_Have patience with the other; for storms will come, but they will go quickly."_

"_Be free in giving of affection and warmth."_

"_Make love often, and be sensuous to one another."_

"_Have no fear, and let not the ways of words of the unenlightened give you unease."_

"_For the Great Spirit is with you, now and always." _

"May these two people continue to trust, respect and love each other for the rest of their lives as they promised to do this day. Today marks the beginning of an unending journey together filled with wonder, surprises, laughter, tears, celebration and joy. There may be times filled with happiness and times filled with sorrow but remember, love has given you wings and will take you wherever you want. Love brought you here, love will make your marriage a glorious union and it is by love that your marriage will endure."

"Jacob and Seth, although I'm officiating here today, it is not truly in my power to sanctify, legitimize or bless your relationship in any way, because the two of you have already done that in your hearts. So, by joining hands right now and looking into each other's eyes, let it be known that you are joined, body and soul in this lifetime, and that this bond is sacred and eternal. And now that you have stood before us and exchanged these love promises, it is my great joy to announce to every corner of the world that you are one. Now you can share your first kiss as a married couple."

We hesitated for a few seconds, overwhelmed with all the emotions around us and inside us. What's in a kiss? A kiss is the visible expression of love between a couple. But the first kiss as a married couple is special, unique and like a visiting comet it only happens once in a lifetime.

We only had eyes for each other; Jacob inclined his head to the right and bent forward slowly. I closed my eyes tightly waiting to feel his glorious lips connect with my own. His kiss was soft and delicate, making my knees feel weak and my heart race. Placing my arms around his neck, I hugged him pulling him closer to me, I never wanted to let go. Jacob deepened the kiss exploring my mouth like it was the first time. There had been many kisses before this one, but none tasted sweeter and none carried with it so much passion and love. This kiss was sacred and its memory will be embedded in our souls for the rest of our lives.

The rest of the night was a celebration of love and life, the toast itself took almost an hour since so many of our friends wanted to share funny or embarrassing anecdotes of us. At the time I wouldn't believe that one day we would all be laughing at our expense, remembering how defiant I behaved and how annoying Jake was. The food was delicious and at the end of the night Jake and I fed each other some delicious cake.

That night Jake and I walked into our new home hand in hand, he tried to carry me over the threshold but I just told him "no fucking way" and he understood. We had decided to spend our wedding night in our house, in our own bed, the bed he marked with his scent years ago, hoping to claim me in a bed marked by my dominant. I felt my blood going faster in my veins at the sight of our bed; the whole room had a mysterious glow, our whole life making sense in this most perfect moment. We had waited for this moment like the darkness of the night waits for the stars, like a desert waits for rain, like a child waits for Santa Claus, knowing without a doubt that stars will shine, rain will come and Santa will show up. We knew this moment would come and here we were in our home for the first time after pledging eternal love to one another.

Making love for the first time as a married couple was one of those unforgettable experiences. At first I was trembling like it was the first time, but just like in that occasion nine years ago, Jake took the lead and with his love and understanding put me at ease. We surveyed each other's body like our eyes never laid on our naked forms before, like our fingers never touched the most sensitive spots on our body, like we never basked in the scent of our shared arousal. Jake and I were so full of desire breath escaping us hard and fast, goose bumps crawling up the length of our arms even though we felt like we were burning up. When the rapture of sex overtook us, our bodies becoming one with each other and with the universe, we panted and howled in delight. We made love with such passion that we could feel our ecstasy all the way to our bones, swearing right then and there that it would always be just like this.

Fifteen years later

"Daddy, when is papa coming?" Asked Sarah for the umpteenth time, just like her father, Sarah was not known for her patience and today was one of those days when that was made even more obvious.

"Sarah shut up, papa will get here soon, you're going to make daddy upset." My Harry was my rock, the eternally happy child who was able to put a smile in anybody's face. He protected me with a fierce determination that was easily matched to that of his father.

_*Flashback*_

Four and a half years ago Jake and I decided to test what Jay had said and stopped taking precautions when we made love. Since I didn't have cycles, it would be impossible for us to know if I became pregnant or when, so when I started sleeping more than usual and eating a lot more, neither one of us thought of pregnancy as the cause for my change in behavior. The only red flag, which alerted us to that possibility, happened in Sam's house. We had dinner with them often, that specific day I pigged out in a way that made all of them watch me amused and perplexed. For dessert Emily had prepared the most succulent chocolate cake but when she placed the plate in front of me, just the smell of it had me running out the door into the yard with seconds to spare before I lost my dinner. Jake ran behind me and held my head while I heaved into the grass. When we came back inside, I went to the bathroom to rinse my mouth, but could still hear the conversation coming from the kitchen.

"I wonder what happened; none of us feel sick, so it wasn't the food. Has Seth been sick lately?" Asked Emily, through the years she had shifted from being my sister to becoming a mother figure to me.

"Not really, but now that you mention it, he threw up a few times in the past week. I blamed it on the fact that he has been eating twice the amount of what he usually eats." Jake would give me a hard time every time I got sick, but I just told him to fuck off and make me a sandwich.

"Jake if you don't mind me asking, are you and Seth still taking precautions?"

"Well, not really, we decided three months ago to give it a try. What does that have to do with Seth…" Jake's words trailed off at the same time that I dropped the bottle of mouthwash I was holding. I heard Jake's running toward the bathroom, slipping slightly on the spilled mouthwash when he walked in.

"Jake, could it be?" I whispered nervous and queasy.

"I don't know baby" His eyes were shining as he looked at me while placing his huge hand on my stomach.

"Seth there is a pregnancy test under the sink, your body is so different that it may not work, but it's worth a try." Said Emily from the hallway. I debated whether to do it for a few minutes, but thinking that it was Saturday and I would have to wait until Monday to see the doctor, I decided to take the test.

Kicking everybody out of the bathroom I placed a towel on the floor to absorb the mouthwash and retrieved the small box. After reading the instructions I peed on the little stick and placed it out of my sight to wait the three minutes the instructions called for. To prevent me from looking at the test before time, I made myself busy cleaning the floor the best I could. After the three minutes I held my breath as I opened the cabinet door and looked at the test. There was only one line; there was no cross that would signify a positive result. Feeling my face fall, I walked out of the bathroom test in hand, Jake was beaming when he turned around, but his expression changed the second he laid eyes on my somber expression.

"It's negative baby, I'm so sorry." I held to him for dear life, inhaling his scent to help me calm down.

"What are you apologizing for silly?" I felt like I had failed him, like I was incapable of the most basic and natural act. I knew in my mind, I was being unreasonable and extremely hard on myself, but I didn't feel like making much sense. "We're still going to see the doctor on Monday; we're shifters, we don't get sick. We need to find out what's causing this."

"Ok Jake." I didn't see the sense in seeing the doctor, it had only been a few times, so I didn't know what the big deal was. At that moment I didn't feel like arguing so I just agreed.

The next Monday, Jake took me to see Dr. Barnard and after explaining what was going on he asked me to go in the exam room so he could do an ultrasound of my abdomen. He explained that in my case it was the only way to be sure. He squirted some warm blue gel in my stomach and began sliding the wand on it. After a few minutes of playing with the images and taking some kind of measurements he stopped and placed the wand on the holder.

"Seth you are not pregnant." Immediately I felt my eyes well up and Jake's hold on my hand tightened, trying to comfort me. I had been hopeful that since I was male, the hormones detected by the pregnancy test were not the same in me. "Guys, don't jump to conclusions, Seth you are not pregnant, you are_ very _pregnant. You're having twins" Talk about a freaking roller coaster! Less than a minute ago, I felt so despondent and forlorn, but with a few words the doctor had changed my outlook completely. He proceeded to show us in the monitor the position of the babies inside my abdomen. They were side by side in two different sacs that seemed to originate from my prostate. Jake asked him to print a picture for us; he couldn't wait to show his father and the pack our babies.

"How far along am I doc?"

"Since you don't have a cycle that could give us an idea, I'll have to go with the size of the babies, but then again it may not be so reliable either because they may be developing faster. For what it's worth according to their size they are between ten and twelve weeks old." I had been pregnant for almost three months and didn't know? How could I have not known?

"Seth, I can almost see the gears moving in your head, the babies seem to be that age, but that doesn't necessarily mean you have been pregnant that long. Since I learned of your existence I've been studying everything I could find about your unique anatomy and physiology. As you can imagine, there is not much information about pregnancy in someone like you, but the little I found leads me to believe you will not carry for the usual forty weeks. The gestation period of a normal wolf is of two months. I think you'll carry for maybe twenty five weeks or five and a half months, seeing that you are both human and wolf.

That morning we left the doctor's office, picture in hand, a little scared but deliriously happy.

_*End of flashback*_

Watching my children from our balcony the memory of my pregnancy flooded my thoughts. How everybody excluding myself doubted I was even pregnant since my body wasn't changing, with the exception of my height which increased drastically. Aside from their mere existence which was the biggest gift of all, my children granted me a secret wish. As they grew inside me, my body grew, adding seven inches to my height. At the end of my pregnancy I stood a very respectable five feet ten inches high. As crazy as it sounded, I had a growth spurt at twenty seven years of age! Jake pouted every time the doctor measured me and grumbled about not having his little Seth anymore, but eventually he got used to the idea and the fact that I was so happy didn't escape him.

One morning I woke up feeling strange and there it was, a noticeable beer belly that was not there the night before. I jumped out of bed the best I could and stood in front of the mirror for good twenty minutes, looking at my stomach from every possible angle. Jake just stood in awe, proud to finally see me round with his children. After that I was basically sequestered to our house, since I couldn't hide my very prominent stomach.

The pack was very supportive and the biggest pain in the ass at times. They kept pestering both me and Jacob about the babies birth, they kept asking me stupid questions like; do your balls block your vagina? Are you going to poop them out? That went on until my hormones kicked in and I almost tore Brady's head off, after that everybody kept their mouths shut. Dr. Barnard asked a colleague who he sworn the secrecy of our heritage, to help during the delivery of the pups. He scheduled the cesarean as soon as he knew the babies' lungs were developed and they were a good size. After six months of wait, at six forty two in the morning, my two angels were born with one minute difference between them.

"Daddy I want to go to the birthday party, I want cake." Harry had inherited my sweet tooth but Jake's disposition. Most people wouldn't know this but Jake was the sweetest most sensitive man. Through Billy's tales I had learned to see Jake in a different light. He was strong willed but never disrespectful, funny and eternally happy. All the years we had been together he had proved to me over and over again that he changed for the best and dedicated his life to making me happy. He was a devoted husband, a loving mate and a wonderful father.

"Now it's you making daddy upset, I'm telling papa when he gets here." Teased Sarah Elizabeth. My baby girl was a firecracker; I suspected that if she ever phased she would become alpha. She had her father's charisma and decisiveness; she was fearless and seemed more in tune with our heritage than Harry was. Maybe I was mistaken and she just took after Leah, who nobody dared to mess with.

"Don't tell papa lies." Harry then punched his sister on the arm.

"Harold Lowell, what have I told you about hitting? Apologize to your sister this instant!"

"Sorry." He sounded as sincere as a cat telling a mouse it just wants to play.

"Like you mean it or you are not going to Michael's birthday party." Embry was known to go all out with his son's birthday parties. He met his wife Ariana while in med school; she worked as a barista in his favorite coffee shop. Embry bought his coffee there every morning and after a while started coming only during her shift, he was able to learn her schedule from one of her co-workers who was trying to play match maker. They got married and moved back to La Push after he completed his residence in internal medicine. Her Hispanic heritage made her blend in easily; she was bubbly and full of life. Every time I saw them together I couldn't help but marvel at the way they complemented each other. Embry didn't worry about the fact he hadn't imprinted, just like me he fell in love in a very human way.

"I'm sorry, sissy." He sounded more sincere and rubbed her arm.

"That's more like it." At last Jake pulled into the driveway in his new truck. A year after the twins were born, Jake's boss decided to retire and move to a place with nicer climate, which in my opinion could be anywhere. Jake had proved more than once to be a very skilled mechanic and invaluable member of his team, attracting many clients who wouldn't allow anybody else fix their cars. His boss asked Jake if he wanted to buy the shop with all the equipment and list of clients included. The price was fair, putting as collateral our house and Billy's, he was able to get a loan and bought the shop. Known for its fair prices and good honest service, the business soared and soon it was listed as the best garage in the area.

After having the babies I decided to work from home and managed the books in addition to dealing with suppliers and clients. I made a good living managing various businesses from home, including Jake's garage, the reservation's store and Quil's sandwich shop.

"Papa, papa!" The kids ran to greet their dad as he was getting off the truck. Jake picked them up happily, his beautiful smile adorning his face.

"You're late." Scolded Sarah.

"I'm apologize little miss, papa had to take care of something at the shop but I'm here now. Are you ready to go to the party? Get in Daddy's van, let's go." Both kids looked at Jake pouting slightly. I had to interfere before it turned into an all-out tantrum.

Walking towards Jake I kissed him chastely on the lips. It was nice that now he didn't need to bend forward as much anymore.

"Love, you promised, we would go as wolves and they could ride on our backs."

"Of course I remembered; I just wanted to tease you." He kissed each kid on the cheek and placed them on the floor. I grabbed his hand and interlacing our fingers we walked towards the woods to phase.

We took our clothes off placing them in a bag that we gave Harry. Sarah had another bag with the present. We phased and crouched on the floor so our children could climb on our backs. Invariably Harry always rode on my back, while Sarah preferred Jake's. As soon as they were secure on our backs we took off running through the woods, the thick canopy making the bright sunny day seem dark and cloudy. Jumping branches and snaking by the trees to protect our children from getting hit. We could feel their small hands pulling on our fur to steady themselves. Their shrieks of joy could be heard all over and filled my heart with boundless love.

As I ran through this forest that held so many memories, in the company of my three treasures, I had to recognize that my life was perfect. Years ago my fears kept me prisoner and Jake's love gave me wings. My idea of freedom kept me anchored to the ground and prevented me from taking flight. I cherished my freedom and was terrified of losing it, thinking that submissive was a synonym of slave. But I was wrong; Jake's love showed me that my freedom resided inside me. His voice spoke to my very soul and helped me find the better part of me that was being held captive in me. Now I wake up next to him every morning. In his arms I feel like my life is a beautiful dream that I never want to wake up from. I'm thankful for my life, because now I have him, I have my children and the three of them gave me my freedom.

****************************************FIN******************************************


	36. Chapter 36

**Hello everybody!**

**No new chapter here I'm sorry. Just a note to let you know the first chapter of the new story will be posted this coming weekend. Many of you asked me about Quil and Paul and this story will be about them. I left their story unfinished in "I will claim you" on purpose, because I felt they deserved their own story, even if it is short. As I said, it is a very short story (just a few chapters) and will deal with dark themes like suicide and alcohol use. **

**The title is "Five Weeks" **

**Summary: After the death of his imprint Paul swore he was going to take his life as soon as his grandfather passed away. He changed his mind when he began his relationship with Leah. Unfortunately Leah imprints basically forgetting he even exists. It will be up to his only friend Quil to keep him anchored to this world. Quil makes a deal with Paul when he finds him getting ready to jump from the highest cliff towards the rocky floor during low tide. He asks Paul to give him five weeks to show him that life is worth living. It will take all of Quil's energy, friendship and love to convince the man he loves to stay with him.**

**I hope you give it a chance.**

**Thanks!**


	37. Chapter 37

Hello everybody! I wanted to let you know I just posted a new story. The title is Master of My Soul, with my favorite pairing, Jacob and Seth. Please check it out and let me know what you think.

Summary: What happens when a person loses his humanity? Jacob Black, the cruelest dominant of the new world, is the perfect example. In a strict and unforgiving caste system it will take the lowest of the low to help him find what he had long lost. Can Seth, a submissive slave, achieve such task before it's too late? Contains heavy angst, abuse and cruelty.


End file.
